The Lucy Show-S6E3: Lucy And The French Movie Star
30min | Comedy | TV Series (1962–1968)
A European movie company fronted by a famous French movie actor comes to Los Angeles to set up shop. Mr. Mooney's plans to land their account are nearly scuttled when Lucy becomes inebriated on French champagne.
Creators: Bob Carroll Jr., Madelyn Davis, Bob Schiller
Stars: Lucille Ball, Gale Gordon, Vivian Vance
30min | Comedy | TV Series (1962–1968)
A European movie company fronted by a famous French movie actor comes to Los Angeles to set up shop. Mr. Mooney's plans to land their account are nearly scuttled when Lucy becomes inebriated on French champagne.
Creators: Bob Carroll Jr., Madelyn Davis, Bob Schiller
Stars: Lucille Ball, Gale Gordon, Vivian Vance
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00The Lucy Show, starring Lucille Ball, co-starring Gail Gordon.
00:30Good morning, Mr. Moody.
00:51Good morning.
00:52Do you have the mail?
00:53Well, I certainly have, right here.
00:55I've been waiting for it, you know.
00:56You're late, you're late.
00:57Oh, I'm sorry.
00:58Open this one, it looks important.
01:00Yes, sir.
01:01Better open that one, too.
01:02You can't get here on time, I'll never know.
01:04Oh, I'm sorry, Mr. Moody.
01:05I'm never late.
01:06Not me.
01:07Not that late, Mr. Moody.
01:08I am here, right on the spot, all the time.
01:11There's...
01:12Oh, I wonder...
01:13Wow!
01:14Wow what?
01:15This letter's from Mr. Cheever.
01:18Oh, Mr. Cheever, huh?
01:20Oh, does he want to know how I'm handling things here while he's back east?
01:24No.
01:25No, listen to this.
01:26Dear Moony, Monsieur Jacques Dupre will arrive in Los Angeles on Monday
01:32and I have suggested that he visit you in your office.
01:35He's coming here.
01:36He's coming right here.
01:38His company is scheduled to produce pictures in Hollywood.
01:41I am most hopeful you can land the account yours truly, Mr. Cheever.
01:44What do you think of that?
01:45Well, I'm delighted to have the opportunity to accommodate him.
01:49Are you a fan of his, too?
01:51As long as he is president of this bank, I will be a fan of Mr. Cheever.
01:56I meant, are you a fan of Jacques Dupre?
02:00Who is Jacques Dupre?
02:02Who is Jacques Dupre?
02:04Well, he's one of the most famous movie stars in France.
02:07Well, what?
02:08When is this movie star coming?
02:10He arrives on Monday.
02:12That's today.
02:13He might be here any minute.
02:14Oh, yes, any minute.
02:15Well, pick up the letters.
02:17The place looks like a mess.
02:18Oh, yes, yes.
02:20All right, hurry up.
02:24Come in.
02:26Bonjour, bonjour, bonjour, bonjour.
02:33It's him.
02:34It's him.
02:35It's him.
02:36It's Jacques Dupre.
02:38Down, Mrs. Carmichael.
02:40Down.
02:43Monsieur Mouner?
02:44Oui.
02:46Je suis très enchanté de vous voir.
02:53What did he say?
02:55I think it's French.
02:57Does he speak English?
02:58Well, of course I do.
03:00Oh, yes, so do I.
03:02Me too.
03:04Oh, Mrs. Carmichael, my secretary.
03:07Hello.
03:08Oh, thank you.
03:09I mean, I'm very happy to meet you.
03:12The pleasure is all mine.
03:16I have two of them.
03:23Won't you sit down, Mr. Dupre?
03:26Oh, thank you.
03:32Let go of him.
03:37Mrs. Carmichael is such a big fan, she gets carried away.
03:40Oh, I'm fluttered.
03:42Mr. Cheever wrote me a letter and told me...
03:44Will you go and sit down?
03:49Mr. Cheever told me you might be interested in the services of our bank.
03:54That's right.
03:55Well, wonderful.
03:56I can assure you that all of our facilities are at your command.
04:01Yeah.
04:03I'll handle this.
04:07Now, what can I do for you?
04:09I have a few cheques drawn on my bank in France.
04:12And I wonder if you would cash them for me.
04:14Well, I'll take care of the matter immediately.
04:16Yes, indeed.
04:17It would be a pleasure.
04:18Mrs. Carmichael.
04:19Yes, sir.
04:21Perhaps Mr. Dupre might like to look at a magazine while I'm gone.
04:25Oh.
04:26Oh, I must say it's a great pleasure having you here in my office.
04:30Thank you, Mr. Mooney.
04:34I was talking to him.
04:36Oh.
04:40Mr. Dupre, I have a fan magazine here and it has a picture of you in it.
04:45Would you give me your autograph, please?
04:47Oh, I'd be delighted to.
04:49Here, here's a pen.
04:50Now, your name is Mrs. Carmichael?
04:52Would you make it out to Lucy?
04:55Oh, well, let's see.
04:57How about if I write warmest regards to Lucy?
05:01Fine.
05:03Whose irresistible charm and intoxicating beauty
05:09incites the hearts of men to overflow with romantic inclination.
05:16Oh!
05:20Oh, that's lovely.
05:24Oh, would you write it in French? I want to show it to my mother.
05:27Oh, is your mother French?
05:29Oh, she's old-fashioned Irish. That's why you better write it.
05:34Oh, you know something? I saw you three times in Kisses at Dawn.
05:39Oh, did you like the picture?
05:40Oh, yes, yes. I just loved it.
05:42But you know something?
05:43I was absolutely terrified at the scene where the lion tamer got sick
05:49and you had to take his place.
05:50Oh, yes. That was an exciting scene, huh?
05:52Was it a real lion?
05:54Of course.
05:55Weren't you scared?
05:56No, no, no, because you see, before the lion was brought into the cage,
06:00the director insisted on using tranquilizers.
06:03Tranquilizers? Oh, they dope the lion.
06:06No, me.
06:10Oh, oh, well, I still think they were crazy putting a big star like you
06:14in a cage with a real lion.
06:17Oh, no, you see, because the lion tamer told me what to do.
06:20Well, what did he say?
06:21Yes, well, you see, I had a whip.
06:24Ah.
06:25And I had a chair.
06:26Oh.
06:27Now, the idea is to confuse the lion.
06:29Oh, really?
06:30Yes. Now, you do that by yelling.
06:34And by cracking the whip to distract him.
06:37Oh, yes, yes, yes, I've seen them do that.
06:39Now, when the lion raises his paw,
06:42you raise the chair to block off his vision.
06:44Oh.
06:45You see?
06:46Now, take your hand and paw at me.
06:50Oh, you mean make like a lion?
06:51Right.
06:52Oh.
06:53Here we go.
06:55Ah!
06:56Ah!
06:57Ah!
06:58Ah!
06:59Ah!
07:00Ah!
07:01Ah!
07:02Ah!
07:03Ah!
07:04Ah!
07:15Oh, monsieur Dupree, oh, I'm terribly sorry.
07:18Please, accept my apologies.
07:20Oh, I knew that one day this teenage senior citizen would flip!
07:27No, no, monsieur, it is not her fault. No, no, no, no.
07:30I was just explaining to her how I once played the role of a lion tamer in a motion picture.
07:35You see?
07:39Here's your money.
07:41Oh, thank you.
07:42Excuse me.
07:43Oh, thank you.
07:45Well, let's get down to business, shall we?
07:49Mr. Cray, Mr. Cheever tells me that your company is going to make a picture here in Hollywood.
07:55That's right.
07:56Well, our bank has had a lot of experience in that field.
07:59I'm sure you'd be more than satisfied with our services.
08:02I'd be quite interested.
08:04Wonderful.
08:05Then all we need from you is a formal letter of agreement and we can close the deal right now.
08:11Fine, fine, but I must go back to my hotel right now.
08:14I'm expecting a few calls from Europe.
08:16Oh.
08:17But perhaps you could send a secretary to my hotel and I could dictate the agreement.
08:22Yes, indeed, of course I could, and I have just the girl for you.
08:26Oh, Mr. Mooney, you're a doll.
08:29Not you.
08:32I could go over on my lunch hour.
08:34Now, Mrs. Carmichael, I'm...
08:35Now, Mr. Mooney, it's my lunch hour and I'm really a very fine secretary, Mr. Dupre.
08:41Well, I'd be delighted, Mrs. Carmichael.
08:44Si?
08:45Well, of course, anything you say, Mr. Dupre.
08:49Well, I hope it's not unfair to ask you to come on your lunch hour and work at the hotel with me.
08:54It is my pleasure.
08:55Oh, you are so nice.
08:57You are so, so generous.
08:59I don't know what to say.
09:01I just hope you won't be saying, Yankee, go home.
09:07Mr. Dupre, what hotel are you staying at?
09:09The Plaza Royale.
09:10The Plaza Royale. I'll be there at 12.30.
09:12Good, and while we are working, I will order some lunch.
09:16Some lunch with you? Oh, how wonderful.
09:20Okay, thank you so much.
09:21Oh, my pleasure, sir, I assure you.
09:24Au revoir, Darcy.
09:28So long.
09:36Oh, Mr. Mooney, hasn't this been a morning?
09:40Yes, and before it's completely shot, let's get to answering the mail, shall we?
09:45Well, can't we do it this afternoon? I have to get over to the hotel.
09:47You're not due there until 12.30.
09:49Well, I have to go home first.
09:51Why?
09:52Well, I don't want him to see me like this.
09:56To your death.
09:58Mr. Mooney, I want to go home.
10:11That's right. We'll be in production in about ten days.
10:15Fine. Bye.
10:25Bye.
10:31I'm sorry I'm a little late.
10:33Oh, it's all right, it's all right.
10:38You look lovely.
10:40Oh, thank you. I like to be comfortable when I work, so I just ran home and tossed on this little old thing.
10:49You look very chic.
10:51Please, come in, sit down.
10:56I will order some lunch.
10:58Oh, are you sure you wouldn't rather get some work done first?
11:02No, I have a better idea.
11:04First, we're going to have some champagne.
11:07Champagne? Well...
11:10Chateau Bergerac.
11:12Oh.
11:131959.
11:1559. Oh, that was a very good year.
11:19Well, what about our work?
11:21Oh, it will still be here. That's one thing about work, it never runs away.
11:25Touché.
11:26You speak French.
11:28Well, I do, don't I?
11:31Here.
11:32Oh, thank you, thank you.
11:34My, my, I work for a lot of people, but I've never had a job that should drink champagne on.
11:40Well, your secretary, as charming as you, is a very good person.
11:46Well, your secretary, as charming as you, invites hospitality.
11:50Oh, thank you.
11:57Good?
11:58Oh, it's delicious.
12:02Gee, when I saw you in the movies, I never dreamed that I'd be sitting here with you, drinking champagne and talking French.
12:12C'est la vie.
12:14C'est la vie.
12:16Oh, um, hinky dinky parley voo.
12:33I was thirsty.
12:37That sure beats a coffee break.
12:41Well, I am glad that you are enjoying yourself. Here.
12:46Merci.
12:51You mean to say merci?
12:53No, I meant mercy. I know what this stuff can do to you.
13:00Touché.
13:01Oh, thank you. That's the first time anyone ever touché'd me.
13:07You know that you have a delightful sense of humor?
13:10Yes, I know.
13:13Uh, à votre santé.
13:15Hm?
13:16À votre santé.
13:18Uh, mademoiselle from armatier.
13:22Here.
13:35Good.
13:40It's very good.
13:46Oh, uh...
13:49Monsieur Dupré, I don't think I'd better have any more champagne. We do have work to do.
13:55Oh. Would you rather I dictate Mr. Mooney's letter before we have lunch?
14:01Yes. Yes, I think so. I believe I've wasted enough of your time.
14:08A fascinating woman is never a waste of time.
14:12Me, fascinating?
14:14No, really, really, I find you very, very attractive.
14:17On the little bit you've had to drink?
14:22Lucy.
14:23What?
14:25You know something?
14:26What?
14:27You are such a delightful little pixie.
14:29Oh.
14:32You know, you know what I like about you?
14:34What?
14:35You sure know how to treat help.
14:38Oh.
14:43Oh, and I do dig these crazy fringe benefits.
14:50But we, we, uh, we'd better get started, uh, with our work.
14:54All right. All right.
14:56Whatever you're going to do.
15:01I, uh...
15:03I'm ready.
15:05Let's see, we'll start, uh...
15:07Oh.
15:10I beg your pardon.
15:13Uh, let's see.
15:14Oh. Oh, my, I have really got...
15:18I got them. I've got the hiccups.
15:21Oh, I'm terribly embarrassed.
15:23Oh, but I, I know how to get rid of them.
15:25Uh, let's see now, they said take 10, 15 swallows of, uh, of something and hold your nose.
15:31Yeah, that was it.
15:36Oh.
16:01Hey.
16:04There. That ought to do it.
16:06Where are you?
16:07Here, here, here, here, here.
16:10Oh.
16:11Oh.
16:12You, uh, you, you feel better?
16:14I feel fine.
16:16Good.
16:17All right, uh, let's get on with the dictation, huh?
16:20All righty.
16:28All right, uh, address, uh, the letter to your boss.
16:32The letter to your boss.
16:37Uh, dear sir.
16:41Uh, the following, uh, no.
16:43The following is a letter by...
16:45Monsieur Dupre.
16:47Yes?
16:48Did you say address this letter to my boss?
16:51Yes.
16:53What's his name?
16:58Mr. Mooney.
17:01That's right.
17:03That's right.
17:05The following...
17:06How can you remember that with all I've had to drink?
17:12All right.
17:13Uh, the following is a letter of agreement between the Dupre production company and...
17:18I, I don't know what's the matter. I, I can't believe this.
17:22Well, what is it?
17:24This has never happened before.
17:27What?
17:28My ballpoint pen has never failed me before.
17:33You've got it upside down.
17:38So I have.
17:52Are you ready?
17:54For what?
17:59I think you'd better have some, uh, black coffee.
18:02Black coffee?
18:03It will make you feel better.
18:05I am perfectly all right.
18:08I assure you I'm doing my job.
18:11I am a very competent secretary.
18:18I think you'd better have some black coffee.
18:21Black coffee?
18:22It will make you feel better.
18:24I am perfectly all right.
18:27Yeah, of course, of course you are.
18:29But, uh, if you are going to try to, to take dictation,
18:32I think better you should have some, uh, black coffee.
18:35I don't need any black coffee.
18:37I'll be all right if you'll just hold the room still.
18:45Darling!
18:47Je ne sais pas quoi faire.
18:51Je ne sais pas what to do.
18:56No.
19:01You know what? I've never been on such a big boat before.
19:06Boat?
19:08Yeah, what time do you sail?
19:10Same.
19:12You know, the last time I saw somebody off, I wound up in Catalina.
19:16I'd better get off here before they pull up the gangplank.
19:21Oh, my God!
19:24What about the letter?
19:26The letter?
19:30Yeah.
19:32Yes, the letter, the letter.
19:35Don't forget to write!
19:38Darling, je vous aime beaucoup.
19:42Je ne sais pas ce que vous faites.
19:51Je ne sais pas ce que vous faites.
19:59Hello, Mooney.
20:01Oh, Mr. Cheever, sir.
20:03I didn't expect you back so soon.
20:05Well, that's the jet age for you.
20:07Now, tell me, did you get my letter regarding Monsieur Dupre?
20:10Oh, yes, yes, I did, and he was in my office this morning.
20:13Well, I hope you made a good impression upon him.
20:15This could be the biggest deal of the year.
20:17Oh, yes, I think I did, sir.
20:19The secretary is over at his hotel right now getting a letter of agreement.
20:22And when she gets back with that letter, the deal is in the bag.
20:26Oh, that's fine.
20:28Good boy! I knew I could count on you.
20:31Oh, thank you, sir.
20:32Bye, Mr. Dupre.
20:33Je vous aime beaucoup.
20:40Mrs. Carmichael!
20:43Oh, hi, Mr. Mooney.
20:45Mr. Cheever!
20:47Hi, Bank! Hi, World!
20:51I think she's high.
20:55Mrs. Carmichael.
20:56Yes?
20:57I trust you kept your appointment with Mr. Dupre?
21:00I sure did.
21:05Mrs. Carmichael.
21:06Yes?
21:07You have been drinking.
21:09Oh, no.
21:12Only a little champagne.
21:14It was 1959.
21:16It was a very good year.
21:20Mooney, as she has caused any embarrassment with Mr. Dupre,
21:25I am going to hold you responsible.
21:30Mr. Dupre said that I was very charming company.
21:34Well, never mind that. Just give me the letter.
21:40Give me the letter.
21:42What letter?
21:43What letter?
21:45I asked you first.
21:48I sent you to get a letter of agreement.
21:52Oh, that letter.
21:55I didn't get it.
21:58A fine way to lose an important client.
22:01Mooney, we'll discuss this in my office at once.
22:06I'll be waiting for you.
22:09Now you see what you've done?
22:11Well, you didn't give me a chance to explain.
22:14The only thing I will give you is a little pink slip
22:17to go with your little pink eyes.
22:20What do you mean?
22:21You are fired.
22:22Oh, Mr. Mooney.
22:23Now you start cleaning out your desk.
22:25And by the time I get back, you had better be gone.
22:35By the time I get back, you had better be gone.
22:40I'll be gone, all right.
22:42I should have gotten out of here a long time ago.
22:45You'll have to ask me twice.
22:48I can get along without you, you know.
22:51I'll collect my unemployment insurance.
22:56It'll be the first time I got a raise in two years.
23:05Oh, Mr. Dupre.
23:07I was worried about you after you jumped ship.
23:12Oh.
23:13Yes.
23:14We have a little unfinished business, haven't we?
23:19Oh.
23:20Yes.
23:23Here's the letter.
23:25Oh, that letter.
23:28I've never come across in my life
23:30paper enslaving my fingers to the phone.
23:35As an undertake, do not expect a letter of reference.
23:39Pack up and go.
23:43Monsieur Dupre.
23:45Oh, Mr. Dupre.
23:48I dropped in to give Mrs. Carmichael the letter of agreement.
23:52Oh, the letter.
23:53Yes.
23:54We got it.
23:57Well, Monsieur Dupre, I am delighted.
24:00Sir.
24:01How would you like to have lunch with Mr. Mooney and me?
24:05I'm sorry, gentlemen, but I already have an engagement lunch
24:08with Mrs. Carmichael.
24:12Mrs. Carmichael.
24:14Oh.
24:16But remember, no more champagne.
24:18Oh, of course not.
24:19You've had too much already.
24:24Oh, Mr. Mooney.
24:26Mr. Mooney, while I'm gone,
24:28would you tidy up my desk?
24:30What?
24:32You heard her.
24:33Tidy up her desk.
24:36Darling, je vous emboucle.
24:39Je ne sais pas ce que vous dites.
25:00The End