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Court métrageTranscription
00:00 (Musique)
00:02 (Vidéo)
00:04 (Vidéo)
00:06 (Vidéo)
00:08 (Vidéo)
00:10 (Vidéo)
00:13 (Vidéo)
00:16 (Vidéo)
00:18 Steve, c'est une des plus drôles de comedy de ma vie !
00:22 Il faut le voir pour le croire.
00:25 Tu dois le croire, sinon tu ne le verras pas.
00:29 "Ma femme est allée au salon de beauté, elle a un casque de chien et elle a l'air fantastique."
00:34 "Et le casque est tombé."
00:36 "Bonsoir, je suis Kevin Case et vous n'êtes pas."
00:39 Du slapstick à l'étonnant, et aux moments préférés des stars,
00:45 nous avons recherché des stars de côte à côte,
00:48 les favorites américains,
00:50 dans les 100 moments les plus drôles du 20ème siècle.
00:54 Le slapstick, une dépiction exagérée des personnages qui se humilient.
01:10 Depuis le début, l'ingrédient secret a été un pain de cuisson qui se trouve dans la tête de quelqu'un.
01:17 Mieux qu'eux que nous, peut-être c'est pourquoi le slapstick ne va jamais sortir de style.
01:39 "Est-ce qu'on laisse quelque chose d'autre?"
01:41 "Non."
01:42 "Oh, tu as laissé encore une chose?"
01:43 "Oui."
01:44 "Bon, allons-y."
01:45 "Oui."
01:46 "Au revoir, les gars."
01:49 "Ce que je pensais faire, c'est de vous donner une idée de la série."
01:56 "Vous savez, nous ne voulons jamais faire quelque chose de ridicule, juste pour faire rire."
02:00 "Nous..."
02:06 "Nous voulons garder la distance de la comédie du slapstick."
02:09 "Vous savez, nous voulons garder la distance de la comédie qui est si basse, qui nous fait rire, de voir des gens en désaccord physique."
02:15 "La plupart d'entre nous pensent..."
02:17 "Pourquoi est-ce que tout doit être fait de telle manière?"
02:22 "Si vous avez quelque chose de drôle à dire, les gens ne rirent pas."
02:25 "Mais..."
02:31 "Mais pourquoi me tuer quand tout ce que je dois faire est venir vous parler?"
02:35 "Je veux dire, vraiment venir vous voir et vous parler."
02:38 Les années passent, mais Slapstick continue de tirer sur le bonheur de la comédie dans le bon endroit.
02:46 "Cindy, peux-tu m'aider à déplacer cette planche de fer?"
02:48 "Oh, ne t'inquiète pas, je peux le faire moi-même."
02:50 "Oh, bien."
02:51 "Tu peux juste tenir le fer?"
02:52 "Bien sûr."
02:53 "Merci."
02:54 "C'est bon, c'est bon."
03:00 "C'est bon."
03:01 "On devait le tenir par le manche."
03:05 "Oui, je sais, je vais le faire."
03:06 "Je vais juste le donner."
03:07 "Cindy, on a un petit problème ici."
03:11 "Oh, désolé."
03:12 "Lâche-le, lâche-le."
03:13 "Lâche-le."
03:14 "Voilà."
03:15 "Laisse-moi le tirer, laisse-moi le tirer."
03:19 "Je vais le tirer."
03:20 "Reste là, reste là, d'accord?"
03:24 "C'est bon, c'est bon."
03:25 "Je vais le prendre, je vais le prendre."
03:31 "Je vais le prendre, je vais le prendre."
03:34 "C'est vivant, n'est-ce pas?"
03:35 "Il y a de l'argent ici, merci."
03:37 "Benchley?"
03:41 "Oui, madame?"
03:42 "Luella?"
03:43 "Oui, madame."
03:44 "Madame et moi, on va avoir une altercation."
03:46 "Lancecroft, tu es un être humain désespérant."
03:49 "Prends ça."
03:50 "Prends ça."
03:51 "Tu penses vraiment que tu peux me faire ça et m'en sortir,
04:04 "tu créature ennuyée?"
04:05 "Tu as tué une femme?"
04:20 "Tu sais ce que c'est, être mariée à Evelyn?"
04:22 "Bourré."
04:23 "Tu ne me laisses aucune alternative que de terminer cette chose une fois pour toutes."
04:28 "Je suis désolée de devoir faire ça, Lancecroft,
04:42 "mais je vais me tuer."
04:44 "Je dois le faire."
04:45 "Il n'y a pas d'autre moyen."
04:47 "Oh, Evelyn, Evelyn, je ne peux pas vivre sans toi."
05:02 "Je ne peux pas vivre sans toi."
05:09 "Je ne peux pas vivre sans toi."
05:11 "Bien sûr que tu peux."
05:20 De la police de Keystone à la fusil naquis,
05:29 les prattes de des hommes en bleu
05:31 nous ont donné de nombreux moments favoris de slapstick.
05:35 Le film "The Chase"
05:39 Le directeur Max Sennett a créé la recette originale,
05:43 un peu de cirque, un peu de burlesque,
05:45 un peu de vaudeville, et "The Chase".
05:48 L'avent de la sonnerie a donné plus de levité à la loi.
05:54 "Inspecteur Kane en disant."
06:01 "Quoi?"
06:02 "Je vais aller voir mes meilleurs hommes."
06:04 "Les meilleurs hommes"
06:06 "Merci, garçon."
06:27 "Où seras-tu quand je t'ai besoin?"
06:29 "Là-bas."
06:31 "OK."
06:33 "Je vais te donner quelques points sur comment gérer des mecs."
06:37 "La première chose que tu dois faire, c'est de te mettre sur le bord psychologique de ton adversaire
06:42 en te montrant de la suprême confiance."
06:44 "Comment tu fais ça?"
06:45 "Quand tu te brises pour ce premier coup,
06:47 tu te fais du mal tout le temps,
06:49 et rien ne peut te faire mal.
06:51 Je vais te montrer.
06:52 Tu me frappes là-bas,
06:53 le plus dur possible.
06:55 On va faire un coup de dent."
06:57 "Vas-y, Oakes, c'est OK."
06:59 "Je vais te montrer."
07:00 "Vas-y, Oakes, c'est OK."
07:02 "Vas-y, Oakes, je suis brisé, tu vois.
07:05 Tu ne peux pas me faire mal.
07:07 C'est tout ce que tu as. Vas-y."
07:09 "Oakes, tu veux aider Barney dans ce siège là-bas?"
07:18 "Ca a fait mal à Barney?"
07:24 "Non, ça ne l'a pas fait,
07:27 parce qu'il a été brisé pour ça, n'est-ce pas Barney?"
07:30 "C'est pas possible."
07:32 "C'est pas possible."
08:00 "J'ai décidé de venir voir ce que les mecs de l'étudiant ont trouvé sur le veste de Nordberg,
08:04 celui qu'ils ont trouvé dans les docks.
08:06 On peut dire beaucoup de choses sur des samples de fibre si elles ne sont pas trop moches,
08:10 et j'espérais qu'en ce cas, on ne serait pas en pleine douce."
08:13 "Hey, regarde!"
08:15 "Police! Aidez-moi!"
08:20 "Est-ce que quelqu'un peut me prendre un licenciement?"
08:28 "Oui!"
08:30 [Applaudissements]
08:34 "C'est la compagnie de la télévision nationale."
08:37 "Slapstick on the Airwaves" commence par le radio,
08:41 où un moment préféré était le son de la closet de Fibber McGee.
08:45 "Voici le récit de mon casque de gendarmerie de la gendarmerie, Molly."
08:47 "Je ne sais pas où le chercher, mon amour."
08:49 "Je sais où il est, c'est ici dans le hall de la closet."
08:51 "Oh non, non!"
09:00 "Je dois l'étendre, cette closet, un jour."
09:03 C'est comme ça, dans les jours de la télévision.
09:06 Quand la télévision est arrivée, vous étiez là.
09:09 Les fans de la télé de Jack Benny pouvaient enfin voir le château bien protégé de Jack.
09:14 "Comment on va y arriver?"
09:18 "Oh, ne vous inquiétez pas."
09:19 Le guest-star Giselle McKenzie accompagnait le misérable Mr. Benny.
09:22 [Applaudissements]
09:27 [Applaudissements]
09:30 "Quand j'ai eu ce casque, j'ai fait un pont de tol."
09:40 "Et j'ai pensé que c'était si drôle, que c'était seulement moi."
09:43 "Et je vais prendre un peu de l'argent de la closet."
09:48 "D'accord, Mr. Benny."
09:56 "Non, non, non."
09:59 "Désolé."
10:02 "C'est bon."
10:03 "C'est bon."
10:07 [Rires]
10:10 [Cri de la télévision]
10:17 [Rires]
10:36 Dans les années 1950,
10:37 Dean Martin et Jerry Lewis attirent une nouvelle génération de fans pour Slapstick.
10:42 Et les autres comédiennes de Slapstick se sont basées sur leurs corps.
10:46 Jerry a réussi de merveilleux résultats avec son visage remarquable.
10:50 "Je vais vous présenter mon chanson partenaire."
10:52 "Et c'est un très, très beau texte, par ailleurs."
10:54 "Et c'est une chanson que..."
10:56 [Rires]
10:58 "Vous avez l'air d'excuser-moi, je parlais..."
11:00 [Rires]
11:02 "Ah oui, c'est une chanson que mon partenaire..."
11:05 [Rires]
11:07 "Vous êtes très rude."
11:09 "Je lui parlais et vous êtes là."
11:12 "Je vous demande de ne pas être si impertinent."
11:15 "Alors, si vous voulez vous foutre, suivez-moi."
11:19 "Oui, suivez-moi, suivez-moi."
11:22 "Je ne suis pas fou."
11:24 "Ne vous en faites pas."
11:26 "Je vais bien, docteur."
11:27 "Je vais bien."
11:28 [Rires]
11:31 "Bonjour, docteur."
11:32 "Bonjour."
11:33 [Rires]
11:35 "Sit down, please."
11:36 [Rires]
11:38 "Take off your clothes."
11:39 "Here!"
11:40 [Rires]
11:42 "I don't even know you."
11:44 [Rires]
11:45 "Take off your clothes."
11:46 "I will not, sir."
11:48 "Take them all off."
11:50 "Right now?"
11:52 [Rires]
12:09 "Now, we're going to take your temperature."
12:11 "Take my temperature, yes, sir."
12:12 "Yes, we are."
12:13 "Is this important?"
12:15 "This is really important."
12:17 "All righty."
12:19 [Rires]
12:22 [Rires]
12:26 "You're not supposed to eat those things."
12:27 "I like it, I like it."
12:29 [Rires]
12:31 "Let's test your reflexes, right?"
12:34 "Reflexes, yes, that's important, eh?"
12:35 "Oh, sure, now, we've got to see if you're all right."
12:37 [Rires]
12:43 "How does that feel?"
12:44 "I don't mind it at all."
12:45 [Rires]
12:47 "I like it, I like it."
12:49 "That doesn't bother you?"
12:51 "No, not at all."
12:52 [Rires]
12:54 "Nothing?"
12:55 "No, I don't mind."
12:56 "Well, forget it. Get off the couch."
12:58 [Rires]
13:11 "All right, now you're up."
13:13 [Rires]
13:16 "You're right!"
13:17 [Music]
13:19 Steve Allen made slapstick fashionable for the thinking man.
13:23 He used slapstick to poke a little fun at the world.
13:26 "Hey, Danny!"
13:27 "Hey!"
13:28 "How are you?"
13:29 "I feel pretty good."
13:30 "Well..."
13:31 [Rires]
13:32 "I guess the train ought to be along any minute now."
13:33 "I should think so, yes. You look fine."
13:35 "I feel pretty good. How's yourself?"
13:36 "Oh, just swell. Couldn't be better."
13:38 [Rires]
13:41 "We haven't seen each other. Why don't you give me a call sometime?"
13:43 "We'll get together, have a little dinner. You like that?"
13:45 "I'm your boy!"
13:46 [Rires]
13:48 "That was you first. I forgot."
13:50 [Rires]
13:51 "Give me a ring, though, won't you?"
13:52 "I'll do that. What's your number?"
13:53 "Well, that's in the book, but in case you forget it, it's Bayview...
13:57 four, three, two, one."
14:02 [Rires]
14:03 "What extension is it on?"
14:04 [Rires]
14:07 "Extension seven, two, one, five, six, seven, eight, nine, oh!"
14:11 [Rires]
14:14 "How are you?"
14:15 "How are you doing?"
14:16 "Steve, boy, good to see you. I want to tell you, you're just looking great."
14:19 "Yes, well, it's wonderful to see you too, Charlton. I'm a little dizzy, but you look very good.
14:22 Listen, when does the picture open?"
14:24 "Well, it opens around the first of the year, Steve. I certainly hope you can make it."
14:27 "Yeah, well, I hope I live to see it, but I heard it's a very funny picture, Charlton."
14:31 "Funny? Steve, this is one of the funniest comedies I've ever seen in my life."
14:36 "Good, I... you're looking great, boy. You're looking great."
14:38 "Well, I wish I felt that good, but is there a lot of action in the picture?"
14:41 "Action? Steve, this is one of the most exciting..."
14:43 [Rires]
14:50 [Music]
14:51 "Sid Caesar, Emma Jean Coca, and the gifted cast of your show of shows made slapstick seem elegant and intensely funny."
15:00 "My dear, we are going to try something. It's an experiment. I cannot guarantee anything.
15:06 But we may bring back your memory, or we may not. Are you game?"
15:13 "No."
15:15 "Why not?"
15:16 [Laughter]
15:18 "You mean to say that you intend..."
15:19 "Exactly! Bordelais, bring it in."
15:23 [Laughter]
15:30 "All right, prepare the patient."
15:32 [Laughter]
15:45 "This may bring back your memory, or you may be very wet. We'll try it. All right, prepare to immerse the patient."
15:55 "Prepare for immersion."
15:57 "Immerse the patient."
15:58 "Immerse the patient."
15:59 [Laughter]
16:20 "All coming back to an arch."
16:22 [Laughter]
16:28 "All right. First dunk coming up."
16:32 "First dunk coming up."
16:34 [Laughter]
16:39 "I remember! I remember!"
16:41 "Who are you?"
16:42 "Esther Williams!"
16:43 [Laughter]
16:46 "Slapstick was Phil Silver's trademark as television's unforgettable Sergeant Bilko."
16:51 "In one memorable episode, Bilko and his crew, in true slapstick tradition, were served up a generous helping of humiliation from their special guest."
17:01 "All right, man, give me those steely eyes, those hard muscles. I want all you fellas, Dove men, I want you back in the training suit."
17:07 [Laughter]
17:10 "I told you, man, I want Dove men back in that training suit. Bilko, don't freeze on me in an emergency."
17:16 "Sarge, that wasn't Dove men, it was a monkey."
17:19 [Laughter]
17:20 "State your name!"
17:22 "Edwin Dubrow."
17:23 "Edwin Dubrow!"
17:24 "Edwin Dubrow!"
17:25 "Edwin Dubrow, have you ever had rheumatism, pneumonia, smallpox, chickenpox, German measles? Next!"
17:29 "State your name!"
17:31 "Harry, speak up!"
17:32 "Harry, speak up!"
17:33 [Laughter]
17:34 "Harry, speak up! Harry, have you ever had rheumatism, pneumonia, smallpox, chickenpox, German measles? Next!"
17:39 [Laughter]
17:42 "Keep this line going. All right, all right, come on. No smoking!"
17:45 [Laughter]
17:48 "Hey, Dubrow! Dubrow, come back here!"
17:50 "Sir, something, I've got to stop the line. You've got to stop the line!"
17:53 "Please, sir, let me explain!"
17:55 "Next!"
17:56 "Harry, speak up!"
17:57 "Harry, speak up!"
17:58 "Open wide."
17:59 [Laughter]
18:01 "Overdeveloped canines."
18:02 [Laughter]
18:04 "Next!"
18:05 "John D.K."
18:06 "OK."
18:07 "Check."
18:08 "Next!"
18:09 "Harry, speak up!"
18:10 [Laughter]
18:15 "There's a stoppage in foot clutting. There's a stoppage in foot clutting. Foot clutting, why aren't you moving?"
18:20 [Laughter]
18:26 "Next!"
18:27 "Harry, speak up!"
18:28 "Well, Harry, be free to talk. Do you love your mother and father or any frustrations? Do you dream? Are your dreams and dreams of power frustrations?"
18:35 "Calm down, young man. Do you like girls? Be free to talk about it."
18:40 [Laughter]
18:42 "Any insanity in your family? Mother, grandfather?"
18:46 "All right, next."
18:47 [Laughter]
18:48 "All right, Bill Benson."
18:50 "Bill, tell me about your mother and father. Were they kind to you when you were a child? What about your aunt?"
18:55 "Sir, please, just don't say anything until the general is off the post, please."
18:58 "What are you talking about?"
18:59 "You know, let Harry speak up."
19:02 "What about Harry? I just had a nice chat with him. He's going to be all right."
19:05 [Laughter]
19:07 "No one did it better than Jackie Gleason and Art Carney on The Honeymooners."
19:12 "Good night, Norton."
19:13 "Part of their success was the way in which they convinced us they really were Ralph Cramden and Ed Norton."
19:19 "Hey, Ralph."
19:20 "Yeah?"
19:21 "I think I changed my mind. I'm going to have a cigarette now. You want one?"
19:25 "I ain't in that mind."
19:26 [Humming]
19:30 "Hey, Ralph, I dropped the match in the bed."
19:35 [Laughter]
19:36 "What? I dropped?"
19:38 "Nine and a half."
19:39 [Screams]
19:46 [Laughter]
20:04 "Get that in my... Get that in my... I did it... I joined into a YMCA."
20:09 "What happened to your Ralph?"
20:11 "What happened? He started to smoke."
20:13 "What's so terrible about that?"
20:14 "He used me for an ashtray."
20:16 And finally, Orson Welles, best remembered for serious works like Citizen Kane and War of the Worlds,
20:24 left us this marvelous moment of slapstick on the airwaves.
20:28 In the days of silent films, the secret of success was to keep things moving.
20:33 Nobody did that better than Charlie Chaplin.
20:36 You could almost hear the sounds in Chaplin's silent classics.
20:43 You certainly knew what they were trying to say to each other.
20:46 But silent movie audiences often wondered, if slapstick did have a voice, well, what would it sound like?
20:56 "My name is Cecilia."
21:00 [Laughter]
21:09 "S-I-S-S-O-N."
21:13 "I starred in the first all-talking picture, Mrs. Hippy Melody."
21:22 "My career was going great guns."
21:27 "When suddenly, something happened."
21:31 "Overnight, I hit the skid."
21:35 [Laughter]
21:40 "So to speak."
21:42 [Laughter]
21:44 "Now, when I watch all the old movies on TV, I say to myself..."
21:50 "Cecilia?"
21:54 [Laughter]
22:04 "Old girl, with your looks and talent, you could have been one of the greatest stars today."
22:12 "If you'd only been able to keep your big mouth shut."
22:16 [Laughter]
22:18 "Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen."
22:22 "This is your old fiend, Phil Bruce-a-ling."
22:25 "Phil Lucid-ling."
22:27 "I'm bringing you a prescription, a description of today's pain."
22:31 "Phil Clank, game!"
22:33 "Down on the field I see, digging out of the mud hut, cutting out of the kumquat, out of the dugout."
22:40 "There's Stacy Mendel, Casey Stinkle, and Michelle."
22:44 "Who do we have in the sea field?"
22:46 "Who do we see in the outfield?"
22:48 "Ah, none other than that mighty Mackey Mendel."
22:52 [Laughter]
22:53 "Mini-Michael Massey, mighty Mickey Mouse, Mickey Mantle."
22:58 "I didn't play, he was going to take the day."
23:01 "And if you were on the plane, the players are feeling no pain."
23:05 [Laughter]
23:06 "The players are on the field, so now I'd like to turn over."
23:10 "I'd like you to turn over."
23:12 "I'd like to turn you over to your regular announcer."
23:15 [Applause]
23:16 "How do you do, Mrs. Broadbottom?"
23:18 "How do you do, Mr. Hibbert?"
23:19 "Do you mind taking care of the baby while I go to the drugstore?"
23:22 "I'd love to, I'd love to."
23:24 One voice America loved was the craggy, cranky man who hated babies and most other things.
23:30 "My little woolly bitches, don't you know that swallowing a thing like that would kill you?"
23:35 "I'll get it, here she is."
23:37 [Gunshot]
23:38 [Laughter]
23:42 [Music]
24:07 Spike Jones and his troupe added music to the sounds of slapstick.
24:11 Here's Spike's crew ravaging cocktails for two.
24:14 [Music]
24:41 [Music]
24:51 [Music]
24:54 [Explosion]
24:55 [Music]
25:23 [Music]
25:29 [Explosion]
25:30 [Laughter]
25:32 [Glass breaking]
25:33 [Laughter]
25:36 Ernie Kovacs in the middle of his distinguished Nairobi trio.
25:40 [Music]
26:07 [Laughter]
26:14 [Music]
26:28 [Gunshot]
26:29 [Laughter]
26:43 [Music]
26:55 [Gunshot]
26:56 [Laughter]
26:58 [Music]
27:25 [Laughter]
27:28 [Laughter]
27:33 [Laughter]
27:40 [Music]
27:46 [Laughter]
28:00 [Laughter]
28:13 [Laughter]
28:17 [Laughter]
28:40 [Applaudissements]
28:44 [Gunshot]
28:45 [Music]
28:56 [Laughter]
29:00 [Music]
29:24 Victor Borga then and now shows us that humor abounds in the sounds of slapstick.
29:31 [Music]
29:48 [Laughter]
30:00 [Laughter]
30:05 [Laughter]
30:13 [Music]
30:31 [Laughter]
30:41 [Applaudissements]
30:50 [Music]
31:00 [Applaudissements]
31:04 [Music]
31:06 Buster Keaton, the great stone face of the silent screen.
31:10 The chairman emeritus of the slapstick school of body language.
31:14 [Music]
31:18 Keaton was an incredible acrobat who added many original moves to the art of physical comedy.
31:23 [Music]
31:35 We've selected our next favorite moments from a gifted group of stars who, like Buster Keaton, mastered the art of physical comedy.
31:43 [Music]
31:44 [Bruits de téléphone]
32:05 [Rires]
32:17 [Rires]
32:45 [Rires]
32:55 [Rires]
32:57 [Rires]
33:22 [Rires]
33:28 [Rires]
33:42 [Rires]
34:06 [Rires]
34:20 [Rires]
34:22 [Rires]
34:30 [Rires]
34:44 [Rires]
34:51 [Rires]
35:01 [Rires]
35:23 [Rires]
35:45 [Rires]
36:03 America also had a favorite slightly polluted pitch woman.
36:07 It's so tasty too.
36:09 [Rires]
36:13 [Rires]
36:18 [Rires]
36:25 [Rires]
36:49 [Rires]
37:01 Lucy teamed up with Gail Gordon for some electrifying slapstick on Here's Lucy.
37:06 [Rires]
37:18 [Rires]
37:28 [Rires]
37:38 [Rires]
38:05 [Rires]
38:12 [Rires]
38:20 [Rires]
38:28 [Rires]
38:57 [Rires]
39:04 Tim Conway is the dentist you'll never forget with Harvey Korman.
39:08 [Rires]
39:12 [Rires]
39:38 [Rires]
40:05 [Rires]
40:34 Laverne and Shirley herbal wrapped and trapped at the fat farm.
40:38 They'll try anything to get to the snack cabinet.
40:41 [Rires]
40:53 [Rires]
41:02 [Rires]
41:12 [Rires]
41:22 [Rires]
41:30 [Rires]
41:40 [Rires]
41:50 [Rires]
42:00 [Rires]
42:27 [Rires]
42:31 Fatty Arbuckle was a king-size star with king-size talent.
42:36 Who sometimes played the lady in the piece.
42:40 Outrageous costumes have always played a major part in the shaping of slapstick.
42:45 Since Fatty's time, many of our greatest comedians have delighted their audiences by dressing in drag.
42:52 Here come some all-time favorites just around the bend.
42:57 Could that possibly be Cleopatra, Queen of the Nile?
43:02 Or another sultry senorita from south of the border?
43:05 It certainly could be if it was Milton Berle on television's first great comedy show.
43:11 [Music]
43:26 Milton Berle led the way for television's greatest ladies.
43:30 Our guest tonight is someone who has hit the top of the music business.
43:33 Let's welcome her now.
43:34 The leading producer of song hits and the Queen of the Now sound, Big Maudie herself, Maude Prickard.
43:41 [Applause]
43:42 >> Reach out, you cats.
43:44 Here comes Big Maudie.
43:46 I'm a red hot chick with a stone cold body.
43:50 [Laughter]
43:52 [Screams]
43:53 >> Oh!
43:54 >> Oh!
43:55 >> Oh!
43:56 >> Oh!
43:57 >> What's wrong, Big Maudie?
43:58 >> I just had a drum roll in my girder belt.
44:01 [Laughter]
44:02 >> All over my body.
44:05 >> Don't the names of the recording groups sound a bit...
44:07 >> Pull those real hard ones.
44:09 [Laughter]
44:13 >> That's a little thing we play at the home.
44:16 [Laughter]
44:17 >> Back to the subject, please.
44:18 >> Yeah.
44:19 >> All right.
44:20 >> I don't care.
44:21 >> What is your latest song hit?
44:22 >> What is that?
44:23 >> I don't know.
44:24 I have a pet toad and I just squashed it.
44:26 [Laughter]
44:28 >> I'll give it to him for keeps this time.
44:30 [Laughter]
44:33 [Applause]
44:37 >> Service.
44:38 What about a little service?
44:39 Where is my bunny?
44:40 Service.
44:41 [Laughter]
44:43 [Applause]
45:07 >> You got to see it to believe it.
45:09 [Laughter]
45:11 >> You better believe it because you ain't going to get to see it.
45:14 [Laughter]
45:18 >> I don't know why you call this thing.
45:20 You think it tastes like sarsaparilla.
45:22 It really does.
45:23 >> Don't touch me.
45:24 >> I'm sorry.
45:25 >> Don't touch me.
45:26 You got a lot of nerves, honey.
45:27 [Laughter]
45:29 >> Don't put your hands on me.
45:31 You don't know me.
45:32 Don't come near touching me.
45:34 You got a lot of nerves.
45:35 You can't just come and grab something.
45:37 [Laughter]
45:38 >> They got rules against bunny touching.
45:42 Just because I'm dressed like this doesn't mean I'm a loose woman.
45:46 [Laughter]
45:49 >> Dear Lord, this is the church lady.
45:53 Yes, I'm fine.
45:54 Thanks for asking.
45:56 Today Satan appeared to me in the form of a young busboy at Wally's Burger House.
46:00 [Laughter]
46:03 >> Yes, sir, it's true.
46:04 But with your help I spit on his shoes and slapped his little face.
46:08 You know what?
46:10 He called me a crazy old hag and I said, "Try telling that to the Lord, devil man."
46:15 [Laughter]
46:18 >> I will continue to fight the beast master in your name.
46:21 The Lord Almighty, the big man upstairs, the great kahuna, the cloudmeister, the heavenly stud.
46:28 [Laughter]
46:32 >> Sorry, it always excites me a little bit when I say that.
46:35 God.
46:36 Hey, man.
46:38 Now a little exercise and off to bed.
46:41 All righty.
46:42 The body is the Lord's temple.
46:43 Up to heaven and down to hell.
46:46 And up to heaven, down to hell.
46:48 Up to heaven and down to hell.
46:50 And you're jogging in place.
46:51 Yes, you are.
46:52 Your knees are up.
46:53 You're running from Satan.
46:54 Running from Satan.
46:56 Satan's coming to get you.
46:57 He's coming to get you.
46:58 Satan's on your buttocks.
46:59 Satan's on your buttocks.
47:00 Shake him off.
47:01 Shake Satan off your buttocks.
47:02 Shake Satan off your buttocks.
47:05 And superior.
47:06 And superior.
47:07 And superior.
47:08 And superior.
47:10 >> Hey, Neptune.
47:12 Neptune.
47:13 I'm not through yet.
47:15 [Laughter]
47:16 >> And neither is Slapstick, still going just as strong as these venerable statues.
47:22 >> Are you through?
47:23 >> Almost.
47:24 [Laughter]
47:28 >> I guess when your plumbing gets old, you keep going.
47:31 [Laughter]
47:35 >> Between the water and having to look down at those coins in the fountain is driving me crazy.
47:40 [Laughter]
47:41 >> Hey, Neptune.
47:42 Guess what?
47:43 >> What?
47:44 >> Come Friday, I'll be 500 years old.
47:47 >> Androphonies.
47:49 >> You're 500?
47:51 You don't look a day over 380.
47:54 [Laughter]
47:55 >> Are you kidding?
47:56 It's been that long since my toes fell off.
47:59 [Laughter]
48:00 >> It has?
48:01 >> Yeah.
48:02 I really miss those toes.
48:04 >> Well, you've been here as long as I have.
48:07 You'd be surprised what you can get along without.
48:10 [Laughter]
48:12 [Inaudible]
48:17 >> Oh, honeymoon.
48:18 Shine on in June.
48:19 Oh, hear me prune this lovely tune.
48:22 Trees and bees are sighing and crying.
48:26 Oh, honeybee, be sweet to me.
48:29 My heart is free.
48:31 Here's the key.
48:32 Lock up your garden gate, honey.
48:34 I know you'll wait under the rambling rose tree.
48:37 Pick your, pick your pepper for your poppers fried.
48:40 Beg a burning blossom for your blushing bride.
48:43 Rotten like a flower.
48:44 Cutting me in half.
48:45 [Laughter]
48:47 >> An unforgettable moment with Jack Benny and George Burns.
48:52 One of our 100 funniest moments of the 20th century.
48:56 [Music]
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