Category
🦄
CreativityTranscript
00:00 The first step to making caramel apples is to locate an apple tree and pick an apple.
00:05 I'll take that one, please.
00:07 Thank you.
00:11 [You suck at cooking, yeah you totally suck]
00:15 Before you make caramel apples, you want to get into the Halloween spirit by putting up some spooky decorations.
00:20 Some spider webs, put in a couple ghosts, then you want to get some blood on there.
00:26 Great, that's looking nice and spooky.
00:29 The Jack-O-Lantern is the most classic Halloween decoration made from a pumpkin.
00:33 Make sure to get your jack off of the counter and outside where people can see it.
00:36 Other lanterns include the Jack-O-Lope, the Pepo Lantern, the Apple Lantern, the Cucumbo Lantern, and the Lantern.
00:44 Halloween is the one day a year children are encouraged to take candy from strangers while trespassing with a mask on.
00:50 The Candy Apple is the egg salad sandwich of Halloween treats.
00:53 You don't really want to eat one if you don't know where it came from.
00:56 They're also a great way to make sure kids don't come back to your house next year.
00:59 Now you're gonna want to get your sticks into the apples in advance.
01:01 You can use a chopstick, or a popsicle stick, a nail file, you can use your favorite Wang Jangler,
01:06 you can insert a sharpie, a nice pair of scissors, a wooden dagger that you carved yourself, a breadstick, whoops, or a carrot stick.
01:14 [crunch]
01:15 Mmm, apples.
01:16 The key to the caramel apple is balancing the tartness with the sweetness.
01:19 You want a nice sour apple to contrast the sugar.
01:22 It's kind of like a sour key.
01:24 Remove the stems from the apples, then keep them in a special place forever.
01:28 We're gonna take these caramels, a liiiiittle bit of liquid, milk, cream, water, step up to the mic.
01:34 [microwave beeps]
01:35 Two minutes, power level six or something.
01:39 Once it starts to bubble up like some kind of sci-fi virus, you want to give it a stir.
01:43 That's how you know it's working.
01:45 Now I just had these in the freezer, so that way the caramel will set immediately.
01:48 Parchment paper here.
01:50 Let's just give it a spin.
01:51 Oh, that is some thick-ass caramel sauce.
01:54 Spin.
01:55 [paper crinkles]
01:56 Get the wine-jangled version on there.
01:58 I'm throwing these right in the freezer.
02:00 Bye.
02:01 I'm gonna take this apple, cut the top off, cut the core out, and let's fill that up with caramel.
02:09 Smear some caramel around here, and we'll just glue that shut.
02:14 Now that is a caramel apple.
02:15 Another thing we could do is take an apple and put some caramel in the middle.
02:21 Think like a caramel apple sandwich.
02:23 It's basically a strip waffle.
02:24 Oh, look at me, I'm from the Netherlands.
02:26 Let's try one more.
02:28 No, it does not want to stick to the inside of the apple.
02:30 It's like nanotechnology or something.
02:32 It's like that magical spray that came out a couple years ago where you can, like, pour
02:35 mustard on your shirt and nothing will stick.
02:37 Maybe we should make, like, clothes out of apples.
02:40 You know, that way you'll never get stained.
02:42 That's patented.
02:43 Alright, so our candy apple's set beautifully.
02:45 And if you want to get even fancier from here, take some melted chocolate, drizzle it all
02:51 over there.
02:52 Oh, look at me, I'm Jackson Pollock.
02:53 This is also good to use if you didn't get on the top here.
02:57 You can just make it look like you meant it.
03:00 And then this handle's a little bit loose here, so use the chocolate to just shore up
03:05 the structural integrity.
03:07 There we go.
03:08 Once that dries, it'll be stronger than cement, but tastier than a brick.
03:11 This is mint chocolate, by the way.
03:13 If you don't like mint chocolate, you're a f***ing tool.
03:15 Maybe we can make a crazy face on here.
03:18 That looks pretty good.
03:20 That's actually my first time ever trying that.
03:22 And then, you know, we do, like, the theater masks, you know?
03:25 Set it on this side.
03:27 Oh, I'm in drama class.
03:29 Which caramel apple are you?
03:32 This obviously is the most dangerous caramel apple a human could ever make, mostly because
03:36 of the dagger, partly because the apple seeds contain cyanide.
03:39 This one's gonna be really awesome if you're hungry and you need to stir some marinara
03:46 sauce.
03:47 You can put the caramel apples in a dark closet for 24 hours to infuse them with maximum
03:51 fear.
03:52 If you want to be that house at Halloween, the house that makes kids super excited, give
03:56 out full-size candy bars.
03:57 If you don't want to give out full-size candy bars, remove the candy bar from the package,
04:01 replace it with breadsticks, and a little fortune cookie-style note.
04:04 Life is full of disappointment.
04:08 Now you're ready to go.
04:09 Another way to do a candy apple is to make the stick out of candy.
04:13 That way you can start with the apple and then finish with the really good stuff afterward.
04:17 Other candy apples you can make are the juicy frapple, the skit apple, the tic-tapple, the
04:22 kit-kapple.
04:23 If you don't want to go through all the trouble to make candy apples, there's lots of other
04:26 treats that kids love, such as sesame snaps, pepperoni sticks, applesauce, seaweed, magic
04:32 brownies, a spoonful of sugar, a can of tomato soup, a handful of prunes, a little box of
04:35 raisins, and old man mints.
04:37 Happy Halloween, everybody.
04:38 [music]
05:03 [toilet flushing]
05:05 [BLANK_AUDIO]