Corn on the Cob - You Suck at Cooking (episode 45)
Category
🦄
CreativityTranscript
00:00 It's corn season, and this is around the time that ears make their way upfield to spawn
00:04 in the forest.
00:05 Ohp!
00:06 You gotta catch 'em quick before, uh, ohp, before they flop away.
00:11 If they get to the forest, you won't have a chance to grab 'em.
00:16 Whoa!
00:17 You suck at cooking, yeah you totally suck!
00:21 This video is brought to you by HelloFresh, the meal delivery service that is neato.
00:26 Shucking, it's a fancy word for peeling, and how you shuck is a personal choice.
00:32 The traditional method is to grab the husk and shuck downward.
00:35 Repeat this motion until the cob is husk-free.
00:38 You can also up-shuck it.
00:39 These methods are hard work and you end up shucking yourself silly, so consider trying
00:43 the golf shuck.
00:44 Corn!
00:45 Or you can try playing shuckminton.
00:48 Or you can use a comprehensive spinning wheel dual momentum shuck system.
00:52 Or you can bucket shuck it.
00:55 You can throw it against a rock, whoops, don't throw it against a rock.
00:58 Or if you're quick enough, you can do the falcon shuck.
01:03 The Shuckatron 6 is new technology that's based on particle theory and magic.
01:07 You just slide it through there and just make sure to wash the particles off of your corn
01:13 after, because particles aren't good for you.
01:15 And if you don't like corn on the cob, you can take a hammer and get corn off the cob.
01:19 Or you can buy this corn I've been developing with Monsanto.
01:22 It's a cobless corn and the way we make it is through genetic engineering and it's perfectly
01:27 healthy and safe, we're pretty sure.
01:29 Or you can try this corn sausage we've been making.
01:31 It looks and tastes like real turkey sausage and the way we make that is by having a turkey
01:36 f*** a cob of corn.
01:38 To cook the corn, a lot of people think you just fill a pot with water, boil the water,
01:42 throw in the corn, add some salt, let it cook for a few minutes and then it's done.
01:46 And those people are correct.
01:47 Applying butter to your corn is also a personal decision.
01:50 Rookies will use a knife, which is a sloppy way to go about it and it leaves your corn
01:54 tasting like butter and metal.
01:56 This is the classic way, you just gently roll your cob in the butter until it's coated.
02:00 A more advanced way is to take a slab of butter and carve a corn hole into the side.
02:05 Slide your cob into the corn hole and twist it while moving it in and out until your cob
02:09 is completely coated with butter.
02:11 If your corn hole isn't big enough, gently twist it with perseverance until it slides
02:15 through easily.
02:16 You can also stick butter onto some tongs, tape those to a broom handle and butter your
02:20 corn from a distance.
02:22 This is a great technique if you suffer from a strong fear of corn.
02:25 Buttered corn can be slippery, so be sure to attach a handle like this 2.71A Phillips
02:30 screwdriver.
02:31 I just made up the 2.71A part.
02:32 But yeah, that's corn on the cob.
02:35 And it's more delicious than corn on the log.
02:37 Or corn in the bog.
02:39 Or corn on the saw.
02:40 Or corn on the dog.
02:41 Or corn in the fog.
02:42 Or corn on the job.
02:44 Or corn in the clog.
02:45 Or corn on Bob.
02:46 Or corn on the slob.
02:48 Which is the same thing, get your shit together Bob, seriously.
02:51 And it's obviously best eaten as corn on the knob.
02:54 And if you're sick of corn, consider trying HelloFresh.
02:56 These meals come out of this box weekly.
02:58 You have to put them together with these fresh ingredients, which is not much more complicated
03:02 than chucking.
03:03 These recipes take around 30 minutes, which is only 19 more than boiling corn.
03:06 And look what you end up with.
03:08 Even Bob could do this.
03:09 And you don't have to risk getting lost in a cornfield, which is dangerous.
03:12 I made this stuff and my friends liked me more after, which boosted my self-esteem,
03:16 even though I overcooked the steak.
03:17 For $40 off your first week of deliveries, go to HelloFresh.com and enter code "WYSACK"
03:21 when you subscribe.
03:22 And now listen to my song about what corn dreams of.
03:24 Another day living in a row, moving toward the sky, painfully slow.
03:30 The sun comes up and the sun goes down.
03:33 Nothing ever changes this close to the ground.
03:35 It seems more exciting to be one of the trees.
03:38 Best thing that happens is a mild breeze.
03:41 She was born in a field, but she don't know why.
03:44 Because at night she dreams of the sky.
03:46 'Cause she wants to be a fighter jet on a mission of reconnaissance.
03:50 Mach 5, gathering intelligence.
03:53 Bomb dive, skim the surface, stay in drive.
03:56 Power across the waves without ever getting wet.
03:59 Back fly, cruising supersonic speed.
04:02 Arms up, hands flapping in the breeze.
04:04 Far from the dirt with no regrets.
04:07 She wants to be a fighter jet.
04:08 [Music]
04:14 (explosion)
04:17 [BLANK_AUDIO]