BEING a kitten 24/7 has been the norm for a 23-year-old since she realised she was a feline at 15. Abigail, of North Carolina, wears cat ears as much as possible, spends a lot of time in her cat bed, and enjoys getting head pats from her 28-year-old partner Adam. The couple have been together for a year and a half and Abigail says it’s the first time in her life she has felt fully comfortable with her partner. She said: “I’m pretty much a kitten 24/7 because I float in and out of it so effortlessly. I wear my ears to work and I never take them off – I try not to let people see me without them."
Follow Abigail at https://instagram.com/bubbdhalybee/
Follow Abigail at https://instagram.com/bubbdhalybee/
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FunTranscript
00:00 COMM: This is Abigail. She fell in love with Adam.
00:04 ADAM: When she first walked into the room, it just kind of star-struck. I was like, "Oh, wow! She's gorgeous!"
00:10 COMM: But their relationship isn't like everyone else's.
00:14 ABIGAIL: I'm pretty much a kitten 24/7.
00:16 ADAM: She usually just hangs out in her little cat bed. You're not really anywhere else, which is okay.
00:22 ABIGAIL: When he gives me head pats, I get kind of like wiggly and excited.
00:27 COMM: Due to the unusual nature of their relationship, many haven't responded well to their dynamic.
00:33 ABIGAIL: The reactions I get online tend to go two ways. It makes me very uncomfortable.
00:39 I didn't expect her cries.
00:41 ABIGAIL: My first encounter of Adam was his Facebook dating profile. He was covered head to toe in car oil.
00:51 And it intrigued me, so I swiped and I wanted to see more about him. I had to meet him.
00:56 Would you like a cup?
00:58 Honestly, when she first walked into the room, it just kind of star-struck. I was like, "Oh, wow! Look at her! Jeez! She's gorgeous!"
01:06 Would you get the creamer out of the fridge for me?
01:10 And then she was a little awkward at first, so I quickly got attracted to just wanting to see what more I was going to experience with her.
01:18 Very good girl.
01:20 We've been together for about a year and a half.
01:25 Not long into their relationship, Abigail and Adam realised they both had a preference for all things feline.
01:32 Abigail enjoyed being a kitten and Adam enjoyed being a kitten caregiver.
01:38 I'm about to spill it.
01:39 I'm about to spill it.
01:40 I'm pretty much a kitten 24/7. I wear my ears to work.
01:45 When I realised I was a kitten, I was 16 or 17.
01:51 When I first started wearing ears, I don't think I thought anything of it. I definitely felt more confident when I had them on.
01:58 I love kitten play because it's kind of just my natural personality and what I like from a relationship.
02:06 Kitten. Come.
02:09 So, being a kitten and having a caretaker is just really natural for me.
02:15 I like having Adam as a caregiver because he's the first presence I've been around that I've dated that I don't feel judgement from.
02:23 Don't do that.
02:26 So, kitten play, I put it into two categories. One of being lifestyle and one of being more like bedroom activity.
02:34 For me, it doesn't ever really lead to that. It's kind of just our day-to-day life. That's what it is now.
02:41 But there are additional complexities at play in their relationship.
02:45 For me, I've never really been attracted to people in a sexual standpoint.
02:50 So, in the simplest terms, asexuality is just lack of sexual attraction.
02:55 So, aces can still have a sex drive. They can still have libido.
02:59 They just don't feel sexually attracted to the people they might be interacting with.
03:03 The first time Abigail actually ever told me she was asexual, I believe it was our second date.
03:08 And I was like, "Huh, that's different. That's strange."
03:11 Because I'm actually a very, very sexually-natured person. So, that kind of threw me off a little bit.
03:15 But I like, so into her personality and so intrigued by her and wanting to learn about her that I didn't even care.
03:21 Like, I didn't need that at that point and I was fine with giving it up for her.
03:26 Are you getting hungry?
03:27 A little bit. I want to see.
03:29 I like to think I'm a 24/7 kitten.
03:35 Because I flow in and out of it so effortlessly, I don't really have to think about it.
03:39 Hungry.
03:40 Zip-a-sh.
03:42 Zip-a-sh.
03:43 I've always been a caretaker. I've always been that dominant figure that likes to not really have someone underneath them,
03:49 but someone to take care of. It makes me feel fulfilled in my relationship to take care of her entirely.
03:55 Enjoy watching you cook?
03:57 Yeah, she enjoys watching me cook. I kind of get lost in my own little world when I'm cooking.
04:02 Yeah, she usually just hangs out in her little cat bed and she's always following around, which is okay.
04:13 I don't like when you disappear.
04:15 Come. Come, kitten.
04:17 Not you.
04:19 Don't play with your food.
04:21 I'm not playing with my food.
04:23 Well, it's considered playing with your food.
04:25 It's not.
04:26 So I think I can be a bratty kitten because I'm extremely stubborn sometimes.
04:31 And a lot of times I'm not expecting him to suddenly bring out his caregiver side,
04:36 and I'll be doing something and he'll like swap my head or swap my hand.
04:40 And I get kind of grouchy because I wasn't expecting to be reprimanded, and I want to do what I'm doing.
04:45 Hello, love.
04:48 I want to talk to you about something.
04:51 I was curious how you felt about my asexuality at this point, with everything we've done.
04:58 Honestly, it's helped shape a lot of my character, and I've learned to really appreciate and love you.
05:06 I more than get what I need with you, more than I ever thought I would in any relationship with someone else.
05:14 Well, I didn't expect to cry, that's for sure.
05:17 So happy.
05:20 Old friends, new friends, they all kind of come to the same consensus, including my coworkers, which is kind of cool.
05:26 They always say they don't think they'd recognize me out in public if I didn't have my ears on.
05:31 I never take them off. I try not to let people see me without them because it just feels weird to me.
05:37 I get more of a judgment online.
05:40 A lot of the negativity is just creepy men.
05:46 People that don't believe that it's not sexual and are kind of picking on at me.
05:53 It's so cold.
05:57 I've had people even in the kidding community come at me saying I'm wrong for involving people in my cake.
06:05 Somebody's doing something and is not intruding into your private life.
06:09 I see no reason to judge it.
06:11 Nobody has the right to judge somebody else for being happy.
06:15 What I love about being in this relationship is he's the first person that I have actually had a physical attraction to.
06:23 I do find him attractive.
06:25 Being a kitten, especially now that I have somebody who supports it and encourages it, it makes me feel safe and warm.
06:32 Just innocently happy.
06:34 Being able to be a kitten in such an accepting relationship has definitely made me more comfortable being myself.
06:40 With that being said, I think that's also done the same thing for him.
06:44 Made him feel more comfortable being himself.
06:46 People leave nasty messages.
06:58 You're a pervert. There's something wrong with you.
07:00 Yeah, that hurts.
07:01 I feel like they're hurting your feelings. They're hurting you.
07:04 People perceive us as weird as a couple because we don't follow the regular status quo.
07:11 You know, what the hell is she doing with that little old wrinkly ugly dude?
07:16 She must be cheating on him.
07:17 There's a lot of people that will bash us at any chance that they possibly can.
07:21 It's so unbelievable that she's together with me that there's no way that she's a real woman.
07:26 There's no way this could be real so she must be in danger.
07:29 You're too short and he's too big.
07:31 People just don't get it.
07:32 He's crazy. He lost his mind. What's wrong with him?
07:36 It never deterred me one bit.
07:38 Interabled relationships are beautiful.
07:52 You can date somebody who's transgender and not be thought of as a weird person.
07:55 I know that it looks weird from the outside but it just makes my little puppy heart happy.
08:00 Humans today, we are all judgmental. All I know is I love her and she loves me.
08:06 We're just going to continue loving each other. No matter what, nothing's going to change us.
08:11 The thing I love most about Mason is how cute he is and nothing else.
08:18 It doesn't matter your gender, your height, your disability.
08:25 Love is love and love will conquer.
08:27 F*** the haters.
08:31 [laughs]
08:33 [music]
08:36 [silence]