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00:00 [music]
00:08 Who's the glad gladiator? Hercules!
00:12 Who's dad needs a great creator? Hercules!
00:16 Is it bone? No, it's flavor!
00:18 Is it swing? My favorite flavor! Hercules!
00:22 What a guy! Hercules!
00:24 Ask his friends! Hercules!
00:26 Honey, they won't lie! Hercules!
00:28 Yeah, Hercules! Hercules!
00:30 Hercules!
00:32 Now the boys in school!
00:35 He's entrainin', smartin', and the nicest boy!
00:39 No complainin', he's one of the no-ones!
00:42 He's a hero, can't ever quit, too!
00:44 He's our hero, he's the most likely to succeed!
00:48 Say we're the heroes!
00:50 Herc is a hero!
00:52 He'll be a hero!
00:58 Wait and see!
01:00 Hercules and the Visit from Zeus!
01:05 [music]
01:10 Amazing! Fantastic!
01:12 Now that's what I call a geography project!
01:16 What is it?
01:18 A map of the world!
01:19 Careful! Watch out!
01:21 I spent several excruciatingly tedious minutes hiring a professional to construct that model.
01:26 Your geography projects are all lovely!
01:30 I will begin the grading with Prince Adonis' model volcano.
01:35 Miss Cassiopeia, if I may demonstrate, it's a working model.
01:39 [explosion]
01:41 [gasp]
01:43 [music]
01:50 [screaming]
01:57 Surf's up! Okay!
01:59 Inspirational, Adonis! Alpha plus!
02:03 What's not to lava?
02:05 [laughing]
02:06 Lava.
02:07 Now then, Mr. Hercules, this is rather unconventional.
02:13 It's a map of the world.
02:15 Well, it was.
02:17 Oh, dear. Well, I'll give you an incomplete.
02:21 Perhaps you could aspire to something more like Adonis' fine effort.
02:26 You did that on purpose.
02:28 So the traveling salesman asks, "What do you think?"
02:32 And the farmer's wife, she says, "I don't know. It's all Greek to me."
02:38 [laughing]
02:39 Greek to me! Get it?
02:42 Well, oh, yeah. That's a good one, Father.
02:46 Is something wrong, son?
02:48 I wouldn't want to bore you.
02:50 That's what these father-son chats are for. Am I right, Hermes?
02:54 Zeus, babe, they don't come any righter.
02:57 Okay, there's this creep at school named Adonis.
03:00 Now we're getting somewhere. Is he a titan?
03:03 No.
03:04 Monster?
03:05 Uh-uh.
03:06 A demigod?
03:07 He's mortal. Obnoxious, but mortal.
03:10 Oh. Well, you just have to show him who's boss.
03:15 Well, I mean, sure, sometimes I feel like thrashing him, and I could, but that wouldn't be very heroic.
03:21 Oh, but you're my boy.
03:23 It's not that simple. He's a prince, and I'm a--
03:27 The son of Zeus. Start acting like it.
03:30 Well, that's great on Mount Olympus, but where I live, it's another story, Dad.
03:34 Go up there, down here, put him in his place. End of story.
03:38 You don't know what it's like. You wouldn't last 24 hours as a human teenager.
03:44 Hermes, does he seem peevish to you?
03:47 With all due respect, large guy, cut him some slack. I mean, you banished your father.
03:53 That was different. He tried to swallow me whole.
03:57 Here we go.
03:58 Ha! Watch this.
04:01 Whoops. Back in a flash.
04:12 I feel like a kid again, Hermes.
04:14 It's you, sir.
04:16 Ha!
04:18 Okay, bottom line. I'm stuck way down here. Cold, damp, lots of dead people.
04:24 Zeus, on the other hand, is way up there at the all-you-can-eat Ambrosia Buffet.
04:31 Objective, reverse positions.
04:34 Hey!
04:35 Cerberus, drop it. Come on, now. Drop it.
04:39 We're living in Bonserrat, and he's got to use my stuff for a chew toy.
04:43 Hey, hey, listen up. Look, me, master, you, obedient pup. Got it?
04:49 Come on.
04:57 Pain! Panic!
05:02 Present and accounted for, your cheerlessness.
05:06 Nice doggies.
05:09 When you two were whining about getting a puppy, what did I say?
05:14 You have to walk it. You have to feed it. Did I not?
05:17 I guess I'm really more of a cat.
05:20 Nice doggies.
05:27 Help! Ow!
05:33 Help! Ow!
05:35 I could have had a nice three-headed gullfish.
05:41 Prepare yourself, Icarus. Today is the day I beat Adonis.
05:47 At dodgeball? Yeah, right.
05:50 Shh. Here comes Vizettapus.
05:52 Okay, you all know the rules. Throw the ball as hard as you can at anything that moves.
05:58 You may not run. You may not hide.
06:01 Last one standing wins.
06:04 And people, please, please remember, we're here to have fun, okay?
06:10 Ready, set...
06:12 Okay, go get 'em, pal.
06:23 I'll be cowering right behind you.
06:26 Hey, what's with that kid? He's not cowering.
06:31 Ow!
06:33 This time I've got him.
06:37 Gee, that was close.
06:41 Huh? I can't be out. I had him.
06:44 Hey, remember, as one door closes, another one opens.
06:49 Think of this as a learning experience, okay?
06:59 Hey!
07:01 Who is that new guy?
07:04 You mean Mr. I-cower-fur-no-man?
07:08 Who is that guy?
07:26 He cheated. The sun was in my eyes.
07:28 Aw, come on now. You just gotta pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and...
07:32 Well, you know the rest.
07:34 That was so great. I'm Hercules. Call me Herc.
07:38 I'm Zu... Ah, Herc.
07:40 Um, Zack. The name's Zack.
07:43 That person is about to discover that I can be a very royal pain.
07:49 Hermes!
07:52 How goes the second childhood, Your Splendidness?
07:55 Aces. I showed Hercules.
07:59 Uh, technically, sir, with all due respect, you didn't really satisfy the Herc challenge.
08:06 Come again?
08:07 Well, the gig was to be a mortal teenager for 24 hours, and you used your godly powers.
08:12 Okay, fine.
08:14 There. I'm mortal.
08:20 Whoa, sir, I didn't mean...
08:22 Now let's go home. I've got that deep-down nectar first.
08:26 Ah, well, remember Olympus's immigration policy? Uh, no mortals allowed?
08:31 See, you've got that mortal thing happening now.
08:34 Uh, why not try a bed and breakfast? I hear they're fabulous.
08:38 This is ludicrous! Absurd! It's... It's done fair!
08:42 Welcome to your teens.
08:44 Whoa! Hey, slow down! Come on!
08:47 Heel! Heel! Come on!
08:51 Find a tree or something already, you know what I'm saying? A little...
08:54 No! Hey! Bad puppy, come on! Put that down!
08:59 Hades! Have you no control over that flea bag of yours?
09:08 Ah, ladies, forgive me. I'm sorry. He's a bit... How shall I say it? Rambunctious.
09:14 Drop it already! What is it? Come here.
09:18 What is this? It's a... It's an eyeball.
09:22 There! I'm mortal!
09:25 Oops! You weren't supposed to see that.
09:29 Right, understood. Just out of curiosity, that kid with Hermes, who was that?
09:33 There was something kind of vaguely familiar about him.
09:36 No, absolutely not!
09:38 Yeah, all right.
09:40 Yes, of course.
09:42 Sister?
09:43 You keep that beast locked up.
09:46 He's... Sit, sit. He's in the doghouse for, like, ever.
09:49 Okay? Boom, done, gone. Okay?
09:51 Well, all right. That boy is Zeus.
09:57 Zeus! Right, of course!
10:00 Voice, it should have been a dead giveaway that...
10:03 Zeus? You mean the biggest cheese in the universe is... mortal?
10:07 As in no longer immortal?
10:09 As in susceptible to becoming, you know, my province, deceased?
10:14 Leech!
10:16 Yes! Sharpen those scissors, ladies!
10:20 We've got a threat of life to cut!
10:23 You should have seen the look on Adonis' face when that ball hit him in the gut!
10:30 Wham! He was laid out flat! It was beautiful!
10:35 Interesting. We haven't seen your petty side before. I like it.
10:40 Well, of course I take no pleasure in the suffering of others.
10:44 I just expect that Adonis will be a better person for the experience.
10:48 Uh-huh.
10:50 Hey, great to see you again, Zack. I'd like you to meet Cassandra.
10:53 Charmed, I'm sure.
10:55 Anyone who can humiliate Adonis is a friend of mine.
10:59 Zack, you're amazing. You're the kind of guy who can really shake things up.
11:03 No, no! No, no, no, and no! Come on!
11:07 Don't you see? There's a natural order to life which cannot be upset.
11:11 I mean, the last person dumb enough to challenge Adonis on his first day of school was, uh...
11:17 Well, actually, it was you, Herc.
11:19 Looks like we have a lot in common, pal.
11:22 Herc, more than you'd think.
11:24 Tuck it, sighted.
11:26 Poor Zeus. He had a lot to learn about teenage cruelty.
11:31 And what better teacher than Adonis?
11:34 Honey, it's a Greek tragedy.
11:37 Objective, humiliation.
11:40 ♪ There's repercussions from the chores you chose ♪
11:44 ♪ You gotta watch your back and stay on your toes ♪
11:48 ♪ You should've listened to your young son's woes ♪
11:52 ♪ Now you know what every teenager knows ♪
11:56 ♪ It's hard as hate, it's funny when you can't use the power of Zeus ♪
12:02 ♪ Mm-mm-mm ♪
12:04 ♪ You got the screaming, greeching, teenage, awkward, in-between-age blues ♪
12:13 ♪ He's used to doing anything you please ♪
12:17 ♪ But as a mother, you're no big cheese ♪
12:21 ♪ Here on Earth, you're just another target to tease ♪
12:25 ♪ You're having second thoughts now that you're feeling the squeeze ♪
12:29 ♪ You don't need the Oracle or Delphi to give you the news ♪
12:35 ♪ Oh, no, no, no ♪
12:37 ♪ You got the screaming, greeching, teenage, what the heck's his meaning? ♪
12:42 ♪ Awkward, in-between-age blues ♪
12:49 Hermes! Hermes, get down here!
12:52 Yeah, I've only got a minute. Hephaestus is after Athena again.
12:55 Waste of time, if you ask me, which nobody ever does. Thank you very much.
12:59 I give up. Hercules was right. I can't cut it as a mortal. Get me out of here!
13:05 Uh, yeah, I feel your pain, sir. Honest, I do.
13:08 But, uh, you made the rules. You just have to wait it out.
13:12 Nobody knows what it's like to be me, man!
13:17 Uh, yeah.
13:19 Yeah, sorry. Got it, Jet.
13:22 But, sir, that was authentically adolescent.
13:26 All right, one more time. You go on the paper, you don't eat it. You got the concept?
13:33 Ooh, now we're talking. There's only one god in the universe who can fill out a chitin like this.
13:39 [ZEUS GROWLING]
13:41 My patience is starting to wear!
13:43 It's out. Okay, come on! It's gone. Boom! No more patience!
13:49 I'm trying to find Zeus, and you are...
13:52 Hmm. Marauding bloodhound. Mortal Zeus.
13:58 Dog that destroys everything in its path. Enemy that needs to be destroyed.
14:04 Perfecto! Ha-ha!
14:07 You want the toy? Come on. You want the toy? It's out there. Come on. Let's go get it.
14:13 Come on. Sniff it out. Like this. Come on. Come on. You can do it.
14:19 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
14:21 Come on! Come on already! Jeez, you got a nose the size of a barn!
14:24 Three of 'em! You got three big, wet, sloppy... Come on!
14:27 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
14:29 [ZEUS GROWLING]
14:31 [DOG BARKING]
14:34 At 'em, baby! You want 'em? Go get 'em! Go!
14:37 Fetch! Seize! Mangle! Shred!
14:40 There! Right! Go right there! Get 'em!
14:46 Gee.
14:48 I know that look.
14:52 Adonis.
14:54 Ah, buck up. You just have to show 'em who's boss.
14:57 That is quite possibly the lamest advice I ever heard.
15:02 Yeah, I know. My dad said it to me. I thought maybe you'd find it more inspiring.
15:08 Well, sorry. I'm kind of late for class. Hang in there, Zack!
15:14 [GUNSHOT]
15:16 [ZEUS GROWLING]
15:18 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:20 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:23 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:25 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:27 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:29 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:31 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:33 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:35 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:37 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:39 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:41 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:43 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:45 [ZEUS SNIFFING]
15:47 Hades.
15:49 Mmm, Zack! You know, it's hard not to gloat here, so I'm just gonna kind of go with it, okay?
15:55 Zeus is gonna get eaten. I'm taking over.
15:58 [ZEUS GIGGLING]
16:00 [ZEUS GROWLING]
16:02 You'll never get away with this, Hades!
16:04 Uh, wrong. Okay, hey!
16:07 [GUNSHOTS]
16:10 There's a new top god in town, people, and his name is Hades, large and in charge.
16:16 [ZEUS GROWLING]
16:20 [ZEUS GROWLING]
16:24 Hades, this will not go unpunished!
16:27 By whom, mortal you? Forgive me if I fail to tremble.
16:31 Go ahead, knock yourself out! Go, chomp!
16:34 [ZEUS GROWLING]
16:36 [ZEUS GROWLING]
16:38 Leave my friend alone!
16:40 [ZEUS GROWLING]
16:42 Please?
16:43 This is so great, on, like, so many levels.
16:45 Hades! When my father finds out that you're meddling in mortal affairs, you're gonna--
16:50 Well, I got news for you, Junior. Daddy's standing right next to you.
16:54 And when it comes to mortal affairs, he's right in the thick of things. Isn't that right, Zeus?
17:00 Huh?
17:02 Like father, like son. Like, ciao.
17:05 [ZEUS GROWLING]
17:07 [ZEUS GROWLING]
17:10 Let me just make sure I got this straight. You turned yourself into a teenager?
17:14 I wanted to prove you wrong. It didn't exactly work.
17:19 Well, fine. Just change back.
17:22 I love this part. He can't. He actually made himself mortal. You get it?
17:27 Why would you do that?
17:29 My boyish impetuosity?
17:32 Fetch!
17:34 Good thinking, son.
17:37 [ZEUS GROWLING]
17:39 [ZEUS GROWLING]
17:41 [ZEUS GROWLING]
17:43 Okay, let's try this again.
17:46 Fetch!
17:48 [ZEUS GROWLING]
17:51 [ZEUS GROWLING]
17:53 Tenacious beast.
17:55 Tell me about it.
17:57 Get it, boy!
17:59 [ZEUS GROWLING]
18:01 Hello!
18:03 The idea is to fetch them.
18:06 [ZEUS GROWLING]
18:08 Back here.
18:10 [ZEUS GROWLING]
18:12 [ZEUS GROWLING]
18:14 Man, what I wouldn't give for a thunderbolt.
18:16 Sorry, father. Us mortals have to find other solutions to our problems.
18:21 Come on, son.
18:23 [ZEUS GROWLING]
18:25 [ZEUS GROWLING]
18:28 [ZEUS GROWLING]
18:31 [ZEUS GROWLING]
18:34 [PANTING]
18:37 [DRUMMING]
18:39 Is it my imagination or is he slowing down?
18:41 Hey, he's a puppy.
18:43 You played with him, you fed him. Maybe it's nap time.
18:47 They say that music soothes the savage beast.
18:51 [ZEUS GROWLING]
18:54 [MEOWING]
18:56 ♪ Close your eyes until the new day ♪
19:03 ♪ Let the magic of Morpheus whisk you away ♪
19:10 ♪ To the stars in the heavens where dreams all come true ♪
19:18 ♪ High atop Mount Olympus, Zeus is watching over you ♪
19:26 But how could you know that song?
19:30 My mom, my mortal mom, used to sing that song to me as I fell asleep.
19:35 And I listened every night.
19:38 Just because you were living on Earth didn't mean I stopped caring.
19:43 Oh, I, uh, I owe you a big apology, father.
19:47 I shut my mouth off without thinking.
19:49 Oh, nonsense. It's been an education.
19:52 I've gained a great deal of respect for you, son.
19:57 Oh, this is so touching. It's so moving.
20:00 It's so-- I get a lump in my throat the size of Crete.
20:04 He's actually kind of cute.
20:06 Hey, remember me? Little old lord of the underworld, which is incidentally where you're headed, Zeus.
20:13 You'll have to fry me first, Hades.
20:15 Hey, I can deal with that.
20:16 Out of the way, son.
20:17 This is between me and my gloom-from-the-tomb brother.
20:21 Oh, man, you know, I hate to see families in conflict, so I tell you what, I'm kind of a softy.
20:25 I'll torture both at once. How's that?
20:27 Going down!
20:29 Mighty One, your 24 hours of mortalhood is up.
20:41 [explosion]
20:43 Okay, great.
20:51 Somebody might have mentioned a pertinent tidbit of information like a time limit.
20:55 We did tell Hades about that time limit, didn't we?
20:59 Ha ha! He'll figure it out.
21:02 Okay, well, you know, hey, I don't want to intrude on your tender moment, you know?
21:05 It's like a tender-- besides, I think we all learned a little lesson here today.
21:08 I think the kid finds out that you care, you find out being human is, hey, no picnic.
21:12 And me, I mean, I learned that, you know, fry first and gloat later, so, uh--
21:16 Hi-ya-ha!
21:20 Have a nice trip.
21:24 See you next fall!
21:30 [grunts]
21:32 I still can't believe you became mortal just for me.
21:42 Thanks.
21:44 Oh, posh. You're my boy, my boy.
21:46 Well, forget about Adonis. I'll figure out a way to deal with him.
21:50 Very mature of you, son.
21:52 There's no point in wasting your energy on a creep like him.
21:56 Bow and step to the side. Commoners to the left, nobodies to the right.
21:59 All make way for the royal me.
22:02 Then again, that kid is practically wearing a smite me, son.
22:06 What?
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