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00:00 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
00:05 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
00:10 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
00:15 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
00:20 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
00:25 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
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00:35 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
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00:55 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
01:00 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
01:05 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
01:10 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
01:15 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
01:20 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
01:25 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
01:30 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
01:35 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
01:40 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
01:45 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
01:50 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
01:55 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
02:00 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
02:05 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
02:10 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
02:15 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
02:20 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
02:25 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
02:30 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
02:35 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
02:40 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
02:45 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
02:50 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
02:55 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
03:00 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
03:05 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
03:10 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
03:15 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
03:20 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
03:25 ♪ Homer Simpson ♪
03:30 - Bistin! - Hi, how are you?
03:33 - Bistin! - It certainly is a beautiful day.
03:36 We should thank the leader.
03:38 - What the hell is that? Some kind of leader? - Yes.
03:40 He's the head of our perfect family.
03:42 And when our galactic vehicle is complete,
03:44 he will take us to our new home, Blistonia.
03:47 Why don't you come chat with us about the leader at the Welcome Center?
03:50 - Will there be beer? - Beer is not allowed.
03:52 Homer no function beer well without.
03:54 Would you rather have beer or complete and utter contentment?
03:58 - What kind of beer? - The leader knows how miserable
04:01 you, Marge, Lisa, Bard and Maggie are.
04:04 Really? I'm surprised about Maggie.
04:06 Just come up and watch her orientation film.
04:08 You're free to leave at any time.
04:10 Whoa! A free movie! Thanks! Out of my way, jerk-ass!
04:13 Once we collect enough money for fuel,
04:17 our leader will throw open the doors of the Forbidden Barn,
04:21 where we will all board our intergalactic vehicle,
04:24 rows 1 through 31st.
04:26 And with our arrival, we will begin our new perfect lives on Blistonia,
04:31 well known for its high levels of bliss.
04:34 I don't know about you, but they're not exactly winning me over
04:37 with these lousy production values here. I'm gonna slip out.
04:40 You're free to leave whenever you want,
04:43 but would you mind telling us why?
04:45 Oh, I just didn't, uh... I didn't think...
04:48 Oh, it's pretty good.
04:50 Man, this whole place puffs into wacky-to-backy.
04:54 Going somewhere? Uh, you're free to do so.
04:57 Uh... (CHUCKLES)
04:58 Now, did you just rearrange my underwear?
05:00 Ah, there it is.
05:02 When you surrender yourself to the movementarians,
05:12 you are guaranteed a perfect life of serenity, love and loving serenity.
05:16 Not a guarantee.
05:18 Loving serenity? It's about damn time!
05:21 I love the leader.
05:23 The leader is perfect.
05:25 Wait, I'm confused about the movie.
05:27 So the cops knew that Internal Affairs was setting them up?
05:31 What are you talking about? There's nothing like that in there.
05:34 You see, when I get bored, I make up my own movie.
05:36 I have a very short attention span.
05:38 But our point is very simple. You see, when...
05:40 Oh, look, a bird! (GIGGLES)
05:42 The circle of judgment never fails to destroy their self-esteem.
05:49 Then he'll be ours to mold.
05:51 Let the judgment begin. I'll get the ball rolling.
05:54 You're a fat idiot.
05:56 Yeah, lose some weight!
05:58 Hey, man, you're fat! Moron type!
06:00 (ALL ARGUING)
06:02 Hell, yeah, I guess I could lose a few pounds.
06:04 And I can be kind of thick sometimes. (CHUCKLES)
06:08 You've failed at everything you've ever tried.
06:11 Whoa, you've got my number on that one, buddy.
06:14 This is a smart group.
06:16 And your stink brings tears to my eyes.
06:18 Now, wait a minute, Moe.
06:20 (SNIFFS)
06:21 Oh, my mistake.
06:23 Why isn't our low-protein gruel
06:27 wearing down his resistance like all the others?
06:29 It doesn't wear down your resistance
06:31 if you eat a whole month's supply. He even ate mine.
06:33 (ALL MOANING)
06:35 You gonna finish that, Boonie?
06:39 Oh, Grifin, my boy.
06:41 Let's try the chant. Everyone loves a droning, repetitive chant.
06:44 Attention, everyone.
06:46 Let's all give thanks to the leader for this glorious day.
06:49 The leader is good. The leader is great.
06:51 We surrender our will as of this date.
06:53 The leader is good. The leader is great.
06:55 We surrender our will as of this date.
06:58 (MUMBLING)
06:59 It's no use.
07:01 He's obviously the most powerful mind we've ever dealt with.
07:04 Or...
07:05 (CHANTING)
07:17 (ALL MOANING)
07:19 I mean, "Leader!"
07:21 I love the leader.
07:23 You what?
07:27 Come again, Marge? You what?
07:29 I've joined the movementarians, and so have all of you.
07:31 We what?
07:33 All I had to give them was our life savings,
07:35 the deed to the house, and a commitment of 10 trillion years of labor.
07:38 I can't go along with this, Homer.
07:40 Marge, when I join an underground cult,
07:42 I expect a little support from my family.
07:44 Dad, do you think you might have been brainwashed?
07:46 I have not been brainwashed.
07:48 Kill the girl. Kill the girl.
07:51 Homer!
07:52 What? What did I say?
07:53 Church, cult, cult, church.
07:55 So we get bored someplace else every Sunday.
07:57 Does this really change our day-to-day lives?
07:59 Of course not, except that we're all moving
08:01 to the movementarian agricultural compound
08:03 to be near the leader and serve him.
08:05 I'm not leaving my home.
08:06 Oh, yes, you are.
08:08 I'm afraid it's our home now.
08:10 This house will become the new local welcome center for this district.
08:13 And it didn't cost us a dime.
08:15 The house has been overrun by a strange and almost certainly evil sect
08:18 calling themselves the movementarians.
08:21 In exchange for your home and all your money,
08:23 the leader of this way-out-and-wrong religion
08:25 claims he'll take believers away on his spaceship
08:27 to the planet Blistonia.
08:29 Excuse my editorial laugh.
08:31 [laughs]
08:32 But...
08:33 Ladies and gentlemen,
08:35 I've just learned of a change in the station's management.
08:38 Welcome movementarians.
08:40 Continue to improve our lives.
08:42 I love you, perfect leader.
08:44 I'm your CEO of KBBL Broadcasting.
08:47 Homer Simpson, your family will be housed here
08:51 for the first 100,000 years.
08:53 Then something might open up in a double.
08:55 Huh, why even unpack?
08:57 [groans]
08:58 Dad and all these other people
08:59 are obviously the products of mental conditioning.
09:02 Yeah, maybe it'll wear off, like his interest in CB radio.
09:05 That's a negatory good, buddy.
09:07 I kind of think it's cool.
09:08 Just pretend you're in a zombie movie.
09:10 Besides, this is just another place for me
09:12 to create a special brand of hysterical havoc.
09:15 These rubes and rubes
09:16 haven't met the likes of Bart Simpson before.
09:19 [laughs]
09:21 I love the leader.
09:29 Of course you do.
09:31 This so-called new religion
09:34 is nothing but a pack of weird rituals and chants
09:38 designed to take away the money of fools.
09:41 Lord's prayer 40 times,
09:42 but first, let's pass the collection plate.
09:46 Looks like slim pickings today, Reverend.
09:49 Oh, Lord.
09:51 Try the emergency plate, Ned.
09:53 I don't think that's gonna do it.
09:55 Oh.
09:56 See, Marge?
09:57 Our lives are so much better now.
10:00 You two, stop talking and resume the lima bean harvest.
10:03 When we got married,
10:04 you promised me my harvesting days were over.
10:08 [all gasp]
10:10 What's going on?
10:11 Look, the forbidden barn opens.
10:14 [all gasp]
10:15 He's coming.
10:16 [all gasp]
10:18 [all gasp]
10:20 [all gasp]
10:22 Boy, we get to see the leader pass by.
10:24 We toil in the fields,
10:25 and he rides around in a Rolls Royce?
10:27 Yes, it would be nice if he'd buy American,
10:30 but what are you gonna do?
10:32 I'm covered in the dust of the leader.
10:35 He favors me.
10:36 I am even dustier, dustier than thou.
10:39 [engine rumbles]
10:41 Oh, look who the new pad is.
10:46 I've never been so happy.
10:48 Smithies, why haven't I heard of this "the leader"?
10:52 He's as rich and wicked as I,
10:53 but he seems to enjoy tax-exempt status.
10:56 Actually, sir, with our creative bookkeeping
10:58 and corporate loopholes, we only pay $3 a year.
11:01 You're right.
11:02 We're getting screwed.
11:03 There must be something I can do about this.
11:06 Wait.
11:08 Yes, I think I know just the thing.
11:12 [laughs]
11:14 Uh, sir?
11:20 You have to tell me what your plan is,
11:22 or nothing will happen.
11:23 Oh, yes, of course, the plan.
11:25 You see me as a god, right, Smithies?
11:27 Absolutely, sir.
11:28 You'd kneel before me?
11:30 Boy, would I.
11:31 Yes.
11:32 Uh, then I'll form my own religion
11:35 with its own symbol.
11:36 We'll use this special "K."
11:38 I believe that's already a breakfast cereal, sir.
11:41 And people worship it?
11:42 In a way.
11:43 All right, then.
11:44 Uh, how about this?
11:45 Uh, why don't you leave the symbol to me, sir?
12:04 Ladies and gentlemen,
12:06 behold your new god, Mr. Burns.
12:09 Ahoy, ahoy, lowly mortals.
12:15 In addition to working for me,
12:17 you may now praise me as your almighty.
12:20 Amen, sir.
12:22 Mm.
12:23 [grunting]
12:27 Oh.
12:28 [grunting]
12:30 [grunting]
12:31 [yells]
12:32 Uh, we'll try this again tomorrow.
12:35 Eh, he's all right.
12:37 But he's no ball of special "K."
12:39 [kissing]
12:40 This is ridiculous.
12:41 We're already married.
12:42 But, Marge, we're not mass-married.
12:45 At least you got to choose your mate.
12:49 We got matched up on the printout.
12:52 Hey, remember our agreement.
12:53 I'm the man.
12:54 You're the man.
12:56 I could have done a lot worse, Mother.
12:58 Speak for yourself.
13:00 So, do you enjoy comic books?
13:04 And who can tell me where thunder and lightning come from?
13:08 Yes, Bart?
13:09 The leader, ma'am.
13:11 Very good, Bart.
13:13 And who invented Morse code?
13:15 Oh, I should know this one.
13:18 The--the leader?
13:19 Ah, correct again.
13:21 He's wrong.
13:22 You're wrong.
13:23 The whole damn system is wrong.
13:26 [yells]
13:27 [gunshots]
13:28 Better, Lisa.
13:30 You used to be such a good student.
13:32 Don't you want to please your teachers and get good grades?
13:36 [groans]
13:37 Grades?
13:39 ♪ We love him, he loves me ♪
13:42 ♪ We're the leader's family ♪
13:46 These lima beans are even better than the ones we had for breakfast and lunch.
13:50 Oh, a lima bean that looks just like the leader.
13:53 I'll put it with the others.
13:55 Homer, you know I always try to put the best face on everything,
13:59 but there's no face on that damn bean.
14:02 We hate it here.
14:03 And your family wants to leave.
14:05 No, we don't, Mother.
14:07 We love the leader.
14:09 [kissing]
14:11 [yells]
14:16 All righty, time for bed.
14:19 I'm leaving this place, and you'd better step aside.
14:22 Lady, people are free to go whenever they wish.
14:25 [yells]
14:27 [gunshot]
14:29 [dog barking]
14:32 [gunshot]
14:36 [yells]
14:38 [dog barking]
14:40 [dog growling]
14:42 [sniffing]
14:46 [sniffing]
14:54 [yells]
14:57 [sniffing]
15:03 Oh, I never thought I'd have to do this again.
15:07 Reverend Lovejoy!
15:10 You've got to help me.
15:12 My entire family has been taken in by the evil movementarians.
15:16 Oh, I feel for you, my child, and I'd like to help you.
15:20 [clears throat]
15:23 Hmm.
15:25 Now, how are we going to get my homie back?
15:29 I'll kidnap him for 50, deprogram him for 100,
15:33 and I'll kill him for 500.
15:35 No, no, no, just the first two.
15:37 All right, I'll throw in the killing for three.
15:40 Yay! Here comes the leader!
15:43 What an honor.
15:50 We've been called into the presence of--
15:52 [grunts]
15:54 Marge? You're the leader?
15:56 You don't look anything like the beans.
15:58 Knock him out, Reverend!
16:00 [grunts]
16:02 Oh, the devil has given him superhuman strength.
16:05 Give me that. You noodle-on-choir boy!
16:08 Ow!
16:10 Well, that didn't do it, Mr. Kilt.
16:12 Let's the three of us try it together.
16:14 Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
16:17 Oh, you're gonna break like matchsticks.
16:21 I promise you that.
16:23 Hey, I made some Rice Krispie squares
16:25 for our hungry deprogrammarinos.
16:27 Aw, man! You ruined the atmosphere, you daft bunsy!
16:31 Well, this is my rumpus room.
16:34 Don't call it that!
16:37 Outsiders have kidnapped some of our property.
16:40 We must respond with our deadliest weapon.
16:42 The lawyers.
16:44 Attention, all citizens.
16:52 Even though the leader himself is completely nonviolent,
16:55 he urges you to be as violent as you like
16:57 in capturing the Simpsons.
16:59 What are you doing?
17:05 They're not here, you idiots.
17:07 Idiots? That's slander, sir, and we have it on tape.
17:10 All right, I'll get on my checkbook.
17:12 What was that?
17:14 So, you kids really love the leader, huh?
17:17 Even more than your parents?
17:19 Yeah, of course. Absolutely.
17:21 Right already.
17:23 But do you love the leader
17:25 more than having your very own brand-new hover bikes?
17:29 ( gasps )
17:31 What do you have to say about the leader now?
17:34 Huh? Huh?
17:36 He can fly and leap as far as I'm concerned.
17:38 And who do you love now?
17:40 Hover bikes!
17:42 Close enough.
17:44 Yay!
17:46 Sorry, kids.
17:50 There's no such thing as hover bikes.
17:52 They're just a couple of huffies on a fishing line.
17:54 But we heard them hovering.
17:56 I'm afraid I played a dirty part in this little charade.
17:59 Can we at least keep the bikes?
18:01 Oh, no. No, no, no, no, no.
18:03 They're due back at the store by 6.
18:05 Get off 'em. Get off, off. Get off.
18:07 All right.
18:09 Now, what's so old-fashioned great
18:11 about your fancy-pants leader?
18:13 The leader knows all and sees all.
18:17 Ooh. Well, that is impressive.
18:19 And he's going to take us to a wonderful new planet.
18:23 Oh, this leader, he sounds like a grandfella.
18:26 Willie, I'm not sure we're making any henway here.
18:29 Would you shut up, woman? He's talking about my leader!
18:32 Maybe we should take a little break-a-roonie, huh?
18:34 Anyone like a draft beer?
18:36 Beer?
18:38 Hmm. Would you like a tall, frosty one, Homer?
18:43 No! Must resist temptation!
18:52 Go ahead. Give in.
18:54 Beer. Beer!
18:56 Ooh, these cotton polyplanes are so comfortable.
19:00 Go on, Homer.
19:02 Our commandments clearly state that beer is all right.
19:04 Try some.
19:06 (all gasping)
19:08 This man is coming with us.
19:14 Homer, you don't have to go with them.
19:16 But I want to go.
19:18 Well, I would say the matter is settled.
19:20 You know, I pride myself on being a good host,
19:22 so I'm obliged to offer you a beer.
19:24 But I'm so darn mad, it's gonna be mostly head.
19:28 (glass shattering)
19:30 (roaring)
19:32 (tires screeching)
19:34 Homer, come back! That's my husband!
19:37 He's our husband now.
19:39 (all cheering)
19:41 I'm glad I'm back.
19:43 Because the moment that sweet, sweet beer hit my tongue,
19:46 I was born again!
19:48 (all gasping)
19:50 Hallelujah! Now I can show all of you what I've come to realize.
19:54 The reason we're not allowed in the Forbidden Barn
19:57 is because there is no intergalactic spaceship.
20:00 He's taken our money just so he can...
20:03 build one hell of a spaceship!
20:06 (all gasping)
20:08 Homer Simpson, because of your lack of faith,
20:12 you've ruined mankind's chance for salvation.
20:15 Oops. Nice going there, Homer.
20:17 Oh, my gosh. Maybe he was telling the truth about everything.
20:21 Oh, mercy, he's the real deal!
20:23 (gun cocks)
20:25 (dramatic music)
20:27 (gunshots)
20:29 (crash)
20:31 (sizzling)
20:33 (sizzling)
20:35 (all gasping)
20:37 Come back! Come back!
20:39 Willie still loves you, oh, great one!
20:42 (grunting)
20:44 (grunting)
20:46 (gunshot)
20:48 (grunting)
20:50 Stranger, you're a trespassin' on my dirt farm.
20:53 Uh, do you happen to need a messiah?
20:56 Nope, I'll take them sacks of money from you.
20:59 (groans)
21:01 I should have stayed with the promise keepers.
21:04 Damn it! It fell apart like everything else I've ever believed in.
21:08 Oh, I guess it's back to good old-fashioned voodoo.
21:11 Wow, I need a drink!
21:14 Come with me.
21:16 Uh, is that your collar, Reverend?
21:19 Oh, yes. (chuckles)
21:21 How did that get down there?
21:23 (kissing)
21:24 Come back to Papa, baby.
21:26 (upbeat music)
21:28 I turned to a cult for mindless happiness when I had beer all along.
21:33 (clears throat)
21:34 And you, Marge, the bringer of beer.
21:37 It's wonderful to think for ourselves again.
21:40 You said it, sister.
21:42 You were watching Fox.
21:44 We are watching Fox.
21:46 (dramatic music)
21:49 (dramatic music)
21:51 (upbeat music)
21:53 (upbeat music)
21:58 (upbeat music)
22:03 (upbeat music)
22:08 (upbeat music)
22:13 (upbeat music)
22:18 (upbeat music)
22:23 (upbeat music)
22:28 (upbeat music)
22:33 (upbeat music)
22:38 (upbeat music)