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MotorTranscript
00:00 Once upon a time, and it wasn't that long ago,
00:02 when people wanted to talk to each other,
00:04 they used a telephone.
00:06 It didn't have a camera or a navigation system
00:09 and couldn't download porn,
00:10 and yet, inexplicably, people loved it.
00:13 At about the same time,
00:14 there existed this thing called the SUV.
00:16 It did one good thing, which was off-roading,
00:19 and no one ever took them off-road.
00:21 They handled like garbage.
00:22 I mean, if you looked at a corner the wrong way,
00:24 it'd flip over and kill everyone.
00:26 It had no room inside, and they were all crappy.
00:29 And yet, people inexplicably loved them anyway.
00:32 Fast forward only a couple of years,
00:34 and we have a Range Rover that was tuned
00:36 and tested on the Nürburgring.
00:38 That's either the stupidest thing I've ever heard,
00:42 or the coolest.
00:43 - Thank you for calling 411 Information Assist.
00:51 My name is Siri.
00:51 How can I help you?
00:53 - Hi, can you tell me everything I need to know
00:54 about this SUV?
00:56 - Well, Jason, first of all, you said it yourself.
00:58 No one ever takes their SUV off-road,
01:00 so go find a real parking space.
01:02 Anyway, this is the new 2015 Land Rover Range Rover Sport SBR.
01:06 But how about we just roll the ignition credits
01:08 and get this amateur hour shift show started
01:10 before I'm as obsolete as that big red phone you're holding,
01:13 and you can wipe that dirty look off your face.
01:15 (upbeat music)
01:22 (upbeat music)
01:24 - The SBR is based on the Range Rover Sport,
01:42 which in stupid SUV naming convention
01:45 is not actually a sporty model.
01:47 It's the smaller of the two.
01:48 So this is based on the smaller Range Rover.
01:50 To make sure that everyone knows
01:51 this actually is a sporty model,
01:54 all of the plastic on the outside is murdered out black.
01:57 To make sure everyone inside knows it's a sporty model,
02:00 there's carbon fiber everywhere,
02:01 and the most gorgeous seats you'll ever find in an SUV.
02:04 There are buckets up front,
02:05 and they look like buckets in the back,
02:07 but they actually seat three across.
02:09 All of Range Rover's typically British charms remain.
02:11 You have an auto start/stop off button
02:14 that turns the auto start/stop on.
02:17 You have another button that apparently teaches
02:19 your hard of hearing friends how to cut a pizza
02:21 in American Sign Language.
02:23 And then you have this touchscreen
02:24 that is so unbelievably slow to respond and stupid
02:28 that you think clearly it's powered by an Apple IIe.
02:31 (upbeat music)
02:34 SVO, or Jaguar Land Rover's Special Vehicle Operations,
02:40 have made a couple of tweaks.
02:42 First thing they did was to tell the supercharger
02:44 to allow more boost.
02:45 Now the V8 sends 550 horsepower to all four wheels,
02:50 and 2,000 million horsepower to the tailpipes.
02:54 The Range Rover Sport already had
02:59 the ZF eight-speed automatic,
03:00 which is the best automatic in the business,
03:02 so they changed the programming
03:04 and instructed it to shift up to 50% more quickly,
03:07 and to keep the torque converter locked
03:09 at all times once you're in second gear.
03:13 (engine revving)
03:16 And remember, no turbos here, so there's instant response.
03:20 All you gotta do is floor it,
03:22 and it's a rocket from the get-go.
03:24 Gas, go.
03:26 30, 50, 60, 70, 80, 90,
03:33 death!
03:38 It does zero to 60 in 4.3 seconds.
03:40 If you ignore all the idiocy coming out of the tailpipes,
03:43 it does it with no drama whatsoever.
03:48 It's got a limited-slip rear diff,
03:50 so it puts all the power down.
03:51 It's got six-piston Brembos up front
03:53 to scrub off all the speed.
03:55 It has hydraulically actuated,
03:57 electronically controlled anti-roll bars,
03:59 air springs, and magnetorheological shocks.
04:02 As a result, there's no body roll at all, zero,
04:09 and it rides like a dream.
04:10 When you're driving it like an SUV is usually driven,
04:14 it's amazing.
04:15 Super quiet, plush, comfortable.
04:18 It's probably the best-riding SUV in its class.
04:22 But if you take it on track,
04:24 Land Rover says it goes around the Nürburgring
04:26 in eight minutes and 14 seconds.
04:29 That's within 10 seconds of the Alfa Romeo 4C.
04:38 This is a carbon-tubbed, mid-engine Italian supercar,
04:42 one that's so lightweight
04:43 it doesn't even need power steering.
04:45 The Rover weighs as much as two 4Cs,
04:48 plus 501 additional pounds.
04:51 If the big, heavy Rover can match the 4C on the Nürburgring,
04:56 they should be evenly matched at Willow Springs too,
04:58 don't you think?
04:58 550 horsepower versus 230, whatever, nothing.
05:05 All right, you ready?
05:06 Because you're about to get spanked.
05:07 (laughs)
05:08 Oh boy.
05:09 (laughs)
05:10 Bam!
05:11 Let's do this on five, four, three, two, one, go.
05:15 (engine revving)
05:17 Torque!
05:17 (engine revving)
05:19 Not enough.
05:20 (engine revving)
05:22 - I have rear braking.
05:23 - Camisa!
05:25 Keep up with me if you can.
05:26 Whatever tires they did that Nürburgring time on
05:31 were not these tires.
05:33 How am I supposed to pass that?
05:34 It's too big.
05:35 (laughs)
05:37 She's about to pass me on the outside.
05:39 Fat chance, bucko!
05:40 (engine revving)
05:42 Oh, holy shit!
05:44 (upbeat music)
05:46 Sorry, Mindy.
05:47 (laughs)
05:48 Oh, bitch!
05:49 (engine revving)
05:51 This is the stupidest thing I've ever done,
05:53 and I've done some pretty stupid things.
05:55 (engine revving)
05:57 Keep trying, racer boy.
05:58 (engine revving)
05:59 No!
06:00 (laughs)
06:01 No!
06:01 (engine revving)
06:02 Not easy to pass unpredictable people.
06:04 (laughs)
06:05 (engine revving)
06:07 No!
06:09 Come back.
06:09 (engine revving)
06:10 This is where we're leaving.
06:11 (engine revving)
06:14 Come on, I got him.
06:15 I gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha, gotcha.
06:16 Not in the brakes.
06:17 Whoa!
06:18 Never, you'll never get me!
06:20 (laughs)
06:21 Totally unstable under the braking.
06:23 (engine revving)
06:24 It seems to be
06:25 that I'm going to die trying to keep up with him.
06:30 Range Rover this, buddy!
06:31 (laughs)
06:33 Do you have any idea how much this thing weighs?
06:35 (engine revving)
06:38 All right, I'm not gonna get him.
06:40 It's clear I'm not gonna get him.
06:42 So now I'm just gonna cheat.
06:44 (laughs)
06:45 Off road.
06:46 (engine revving)
06:49 What the hell, did you crash?
06:52 I'm in an off road vehicle.
06:55 (laughs)
06:57 (engine revving)
07:00 You are not a dude, I'll be.
07:02 (engine revving)
07:05 You're a true freak.
07:08 (engine revving)
07:10 Crazy.
07:10 Oh God, that's a big ravine.
07:12 (engine revving)
07:15 (laughs)
07:22 I got him.
07:23 What the hell, you can't do that!
07:26 Oh, but I just did.
07:29 This is a problem.
07:30 Oh, he's trying on the inside.
07:33 Not gonna do it, buddy.
07:35 I'm bigger than you.
07:36 Where is he?
07:37 I can't see him.
07:37 He's good.
07:38 But not good enough because final corner.
07:41 I'm ahead.
07:42 Nope, sorry buddy.
07:43 And across the line.
07:47 Victory!
07:49 (laughs)
07:50 Oh, foiled again.
07:52 (engine revving)
07:55 (engine revving)
07:57 (engine revving)
08:01 (bell rings)
08:03 (engine revving)
08:11 (engine revving)
08:14 (engine revving)
08:18 (engine revving)
08:21 (engine revving)
08:23 (engine revving)
08:26 (engine revving)
08:29 (engine revving)
08:32 (engine revving)
08:40 (engine revving)
08:46 (engine revving)
08:50 (engine revving)
08:58 (engine revving)
09:01 (engine revving)
09:16 (engine revving)
09:25 (engine revving)
09:28 (bell rings)
09:53 It's funny to drive something so tall on the racetrack.
09:56 We're way up here.
09:57 It doesn't lean at all,
09:59 which is really disconcerting to me.
10:01 No, it doesn't lean much.
10:02 It's really weird.
10:03 And that, and also, you know,
10:05 the higher you are off the ground,
10:06 the slower your perceived speed is.
10:08 You know, like when you're in a plane,
10:10 it doesn't look fast at all.
10:11 You're so high, every time I look down,
10:13 I'm like, Jesus, I can't.
10:15 And people look like ants.
10:16 Yeah, well, you just run them over like ants.
10:18 That's the British way.
10:20 Really what's obvious when you were chasing me
10:22 in the Alpha was, if Jaguar Land Rover
10:25 actually turned an eight minute, 14 second lap
10:28 around the Nurburgring,
10:29 there is no way it was with these tires, right?
10:33 I'll tell you, Jason, I can't believe it.
10:36 Look at the push here in turn eight.
10:37 We're only doing 105 miles an hour.
10:40 Once these tires break away,
10:42 it's almost like they turn into marshmallows.
10:45 (laughing)
10:46 Like that.
10:46 They just, they just roll under and just lose all grip.
10:51 There's no way to get them back.
10:53 - I'll stand for validation of what you were saying.
10:57 - Thank you for that, I appreciate that.
10:59 These tires have no business being on a racetrack.
11:02 The truck, look, the engine's brilliant,
11:04 the tranny's great, the all-wheel drive system
11:07 puts it all down, even will let you drift
11:09 around some of the slower stuff.
11:11 - Yeah, it sounds good, too.
11:13 - Yeah, and then the tires.
11:15 - Then this.
11:16 (laughing)
11:20 - Why don't you dial in three more turns of lock?
11:22 - You know what, it doesn't body roll much,
11:26 but I do think the whole thing tilts.
11:28 - You're right.
11:29 - Maybe it's tire flex.
11:31 - Tires deflect under its own weight.
11:33 - Something's moving, it's not body roll,
11:35 it's the whole thing is tilting.
11:39 - It may be the entire earth,
11:40 given how much this thing weighs.
11:42 - Yeah.
11:42 - 5,411 pounds.
11:45 - Luxurious pounds.
11:46 - Luxurious, sumptuous pounds.
11:48 - British pounds.
11:50 - Oh, aren't they worth like two to a thousand dollars?
11:53 - Yeah.
11:53 (laughing)
11:56 - This is a truck that does power slides.
11:59 It has to be electronically restrained
12:01 to 162 miles an hour.
12:03 It can beat an Alfa Romeo 4C around Willow Springs
12:08 because it's got the 10 and a half inches
12:10 of suspension travel needed to cheat.
12:12 The idea of an SUV that can do this stuff
12:16 is as absurd now as it was 20 years ago.
12:20 And again, in the past 20 years,
12:22 your phone has gone from being a phone
12:24 to being a Cray supercomputer.
12:25 - Hey, when did Adam Sandler start reviewing cars?
12:28 - This kind of thing might be the new normal.
12:31 And that is just fine by us.
12:32 Hey, you know what this car has?
12:39 - What does it have?
12:40 - I know you don't know this yet,
12:41 but it has a refrigerator.
12:43 - Oh, that's great.
12:44 - Right here in the center console.
12:45 Would you like a demonstration?
12:46 - Is that for when we're done making the video?
12:48 - That is.
12:49 So you open this.
12:50 - Pass.
12:51 - Take this out, throw it in the back seat.
12:52 And then you can keep your spotted dick.
12:55 - Oh no.
12:56 - Simpsons premium quality spotted dick sponge.
13:00 - I know it.
13:01 - Yeah, it's good.
13:02 Is it good?
13:03 - It's a dessert.
13:04 I wasn't brave enough to try it.
13:05 - Yeah, I don't really think I ever wanted
13:07 to have any spotted dick.
13:09 If you're hungry, I also have some Hobnobs.
13:11 - What is that?
13:12 - I don't know, try some.
13:13 Hold on, we have this.
13:14 - It's chocolate.
13:15 - Wait, wait, wait, let's see.
13:16 Nice.
13:17 - Ooh, traditional English raspberry curd.
13:19 What do you think?
13:20 - Curd, let me try it.
13:21 It's not that cold, Jason.
13:22 Yummy.
13:29 - Really?
13:30 - I think that raspberry curd would be really good
13:32 on my spotted dick.
13:33 Walker's Shortbread.
13:36 [BLANK_AUDIO]