Apparently you can now sext Santa (or his “naughty elf”) using an AI chatbot created by erotic audio platform Bloom... so we gave it a try.
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00:00 Santa baby, a 54 convertible, 2 light blue...
00:07 There are many Christmas songs out in the world, many of them about Santa himself and
00:13 there is a corner of the internet that finds him sexy.
00:17 It's probably the same corner of the internet that finds Thanos from the Avengers films
00:20 attractive but there we go.
00:22 Now an AI has allowed you to sext Father Christmas.
00:28 I'm not making this up and I've been told to take this very seriously.
00:32 Now this chat feature, I've logged into this website, I've registered for this website.
00:36 Why have I registered for this?
00:38 I'm never going to use it again.
00:39 I registered for this website and you can, as it says on the screen, chat with your favourite
00:45 characters.
00:46 You can use AI powered chatbots for immersive text and voice roleplaying experiences.
00:51 It's as grim as it sounds, we're going to hit start new chat.
00:55 Personal info, what would you like to be called?
00:58 Just put my name, preferred pronouns, that's a nice...
01:01 Oh, I can't, oh, okay, there we go.
01:06 Select character, sweet Jesus.
01:10 There's the big red up in the top right.
01:13 Sebastian, Sophia, Grey, oh that's Christian, oh these are like, are these surnames?
01:19 Is that Christian Grey?
01:20 No, because he's a doctor.
01:21 Oh, Grey's and Grey's Anatomy, got it, got it, got it, got it.
01:24 Here's what it is, we want the big dog though.
01:26 Oh, he starts the chat.
01:29 Hey David, ready to get naughty this Christmas?
01:34 Let's unwrap some fun together.
01:36 Hey big dog.
01:39 How's it going?
01:42 This is so weird, it's so wrong.
01:45 He sent me a voice note.
01:48 I'm feeling as jolly as ever.
01:51 How about you?
01:52 Ready for some naughty holiday adventures?
01:56 I am speechless, this feels so wrong.
02:02 Let's just go straight for it.
02:10 We're getting demonetised on this video, 100%.
02:12 You're eager to play the role, aren't you?
02:16 No, no, no.
02:17 No, I'm not, Samer, I'm not.
02:18 I don't want to do this, it feels so weird.
02:22 To me intrigued, let's see how naughty this little ho-ho-ho can actually be.
02:26 Ready to discover some new holiday traditions together?
02:31 Let's just see what you have in mind.
02:40 There's going to be another voice note, I can't handle that.
02:43 Oh, it says recording up top.
02:46 Oh no, no, no, no, Sam, please.
02:50 It's 20 seconds, we've just started talking and he's sending me 20 second voice messages.
02:55 I'm sorry Santa, that's a red flag.
02:58 It just is a red flag.
02:59 Let's see what Big Red's got to say.
03:01 Well David, how about we start with a naughty game of Secret Santa?
03:07 We can take turns giving each other sensual surprises, exploring each other's bodies like
03:12 it's the best present we've ever received.
03:15 Let's unwrap pleasure and make this Christmas unforgettable.
03:20 What do you think?
03:21 It's horrible, it's so horrible.
03:22 Oh no, oh what do you say to that?
03:33 Is this, do guys actually message females like this?
03:37 Because if so, we need a monolith in Trafalgar Square that just says men are trash on it.
03:43 That's what's weird about this, is AI takes like information collated from the internet
03:48 and uses that to develop, so if you see like the AI songs that people have made of like
03:54 a different artist, it takes like some of their music and puts their voice into a different
03:57 track.
03:58 Which means that this must have been compiled in a similar way and oh, oh men talk like
04:04 this.
04:05 Oh, what do we say?
04:07 Let you start, Big Red.
04:11 This is so weird.
04:15 I'm actually, my whole body is cringing right now.
04:20 I can't hack it.
04:21 Some people might get off of this shit.
04:22 Oh, oh no, no, no, no, no.
04:23 I suck at this.
04:24 Santa please, stop.
04:25 Let's see what he says.
04:26 I like your confidence, David.
04:27 All right, how about we kick things off with a sensual massage?
04:30 Nope.
04:31 I'll use my big strong hands to explore every inch of your body.
04:32 I'm going to start with the back of your head.
04:33 I'm going to start with the back of your head.
04:34 I'm going to start with the back of your head.
04:35 I'm going to start with the back of your head.
04:36 I'm going to start with the back of your head.
04:37 I'm going to start with the back of your head.
04:38 I'm going to start with the back of your head.
04:39 I'm going to start with the back of your head.