Get in, loser, we're ranking every "Mean Girls" song. Welcome to MsMojo, and today we’re ranking all the tracks from the musical based on the popular 2004 teen flick based on how fetch they are.
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00:00 "Why be so down hearted, blast some trashy pop, and drop into this hot and sexy hood?"
00:07 Welcome to Ms. Mojo, and today we're ranking all the tracks from the musical based on the popular 2014 flick "Meme Girls"
00:14 based on how fetch they are.
00:16 If you're unfamiliar with the story, you can't sit with us.
00:19 Just kidding, but this is your spoiler warning.
00:22 "See us mark our territory, as I follow in her train."
00:30 "Just so you know, nobody, that's not what counts, it's somebody's house and they got no bouncer."
00:39 Remember that scene where Katie plans to host a small gathering at her home, which turns into an out of control house party?
00:45 Yeah, that's where this song comes in.
00:48 Since news of a party was spread by word of mouth, most party goers turn up with no clue who their host is, hence the title.
00:55 "Whose house is this?" "It's my house now!" "Whose house is that?" "It's my house now!"
01:00 "Seriously, whose house is this?"
01:02 It evokes similar vibes to "Big Fun" from Heather's The Musical, depicting high schoolers getting wild without the anchor of adult supervision.
01:10 However, this version is more chaotic and even a little disorientating, so much so that we, the audience, feel swept up in the commotion.
01:18 Almost like we've also had one shot too many.
01:20 "Shot! Shot! Shot! Shot! Shot! Shot! Shot! Woo!"
01:25 Number 17. "Do This Thing."
01:28 Not that we're rushing out to join the mathletes anytime soon, but the club got a rough deal in the film and stage adaptation.
01:35 So the songwriters' nod to them with this strong 11 o'clock number seems only fair.
01:39 "Maybe the haters gonna make fun of you, all you can solve is the problem in front of you."
01:44 The songwriters shared that their winning equation for the track originally involved some inspiration from the Bollywood movie,
01:50 "Dilwale Dulanya Le Ha Jenge," before transitioning to rhythmic marching band beats.
01:55 The result? A number where the limit does not exist on how much it achieves.
01:59 "I got squirrels to break!" "Squirrels!"
02:02 "Let's do this thing!" "Let's do this thing!"
02:07 They formulate plenty of math references and double-entends in a creative rhyme scheme, all while Katie sheds her plastic exterior.
02:14 It might not be the most memorable number, but we enjoy its algorithm.
02:18 "No, the limit does not exist!"
02:23 Number 16. "More Is Better."
02:26 "I'm always cold because the air conditioned air, though in fairness that could be how I dress now."
02:32 Fun fact, apparently this lyric is actually inspired by real gripes from folks who made the transition from Kenya to the U.S.
02:39 We guess Americans really love their air con.
02:42 The number centers on a private moment between Katie and Aaron away from the house party chaos.
02:47 Katie's pretty plastered at this point and stumbling over the tightrope between who she was when we first met her,
02:52 and the person she's evolved into since joining the Plastics.
02:56 "More is always better, more people know my name, I have more shoes."
03:04 Apparently, the melody is meant to evoke a more authentic side of Katie, while reminding us why she turned Aaron's head in the first place.
03:11 It's simple, endearing, and proof that more isn't always better.
03:15 "I should have thought it through a bit. You know what, I had more of stars."
03:33 Number 15. "A Cautionary Tale."
03:35 Ever wish your teen years came with a warning? Maybe every high school orientation needs a Janice and Damien to give a heads up about what lies ahead.
03:43 "Maybe this will make you think twice, kick, lay out, bust in."
03:49 But let's back up a second. Did you catch the overture right before this song?
03:53 Sounds a lot like "World Burn" from Act 2, huh? Perhaps foreshadowing drama to come?
03:58 Anyway, Janice grabs the audience with a punchy, if slightly off-bass opening line, which Damien quickly chimes in to correct.
04:05 "It's a cautionary tale of fear and lust and pride based on actual events where people died."
04:14 "No one died."
04:15 In essence, the song sets the scene and teases expectations.
04:18 Our narrators break the fourth wall again at the top of Act 2 with a reprise that isn't featured on the cast album.
04:25 "You can't buy integrity at the mall, it's not for sale."
04:32 "Nice." "Thank you."
04:34 Number 14. "Fearless."
04:36 "Those rules aren't real." "They were real that day I wore a vest."
04:40 "Because that vest was disgusting." "You can't sit with us!"
04:44 This song follows the iconic moment. Only in the musical, it's Katie who stands up to Regina, leaving Gretchen and Karen in awe.
04:52 "You were strong, you were brave, no, you know what you were. You were fetch." "So fetch!"
04:58 They ponder life beyond Regina's tyranny and celebrate Katie as the one who dethroned the Queen Bee.
05:04 Originally titled "Justice," the song got a makeover that involved swinging the spotlight back to Katie and acquiring a new title.
05:10 "A girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do. I did it for me, sure, but really for you!"
05:16 As mentioned, "Fearless," which appears at the end of Act 1, signifies a pivotal shift in North Shore's social hierarchy.
05:23 The familiar poses of Katie, Gretchen, and Karen mirror the introduction of the Plastics.
05:28 Subtly signaling to audiences that North Shore has a new Queen Bee.
05:32 Theater audiences hear Katie revisit the melody after her own ring crumbles.
05:36 "Got no time for trouble, she'll go right among 'em. And now I know I'm gonna be fearless!"
05:54 Interestingly, this song was added post-Out of Town tryouts after audiences had a hard time connecting with Katie in the original track "Wild Life."
06:01 In "It Roars," Katie intertwines the literal roars of the Kenyon Savannah with the primal sound from within as she sings about her present life and the one she longs for.
06:11 "Like high school, and skateboarding, and rapping, and Starbucks venti chai!"
06:16 At first, it's almost reminiscent of a Disney Princess' "I Want" song, full of innocence and sincerity.
06:22 However, there's a noticeable shift once she gets to high school.
06:25 It echoes her desperation to be one of the pack, and a reminder that being in high school can sometimes be a beastly experience.
06:32 This song flips the script on your typical love ballad.
06:45 Instead of singing about happiness, Gretchen opens up about how much she depends on Regina.
06:49 "What do I do that for? Please don't ignore me."
06:58 She's fully aware of Regina's cruelty, which has fueled her crippling self-doubt. Yet she can't bring herself to sever those ties.
07:05 The melody avoids your typical lovey-dovey meter signature, perfectly matching Gretchen's inner struggles.
07:11 "What's wrong with me? What can I do? What's wrong with me? Could it be you? It's probably me!"
07:18 Writer Tina Fey and lyricist Nell Benjamin wanted a number mirroring relatable teenage girl dynamics.
07:24 After writing it, they realized Gretchen was the perfect character to voice those feelings.
07:28 The reprise, sung by Gretchen and Mrs. George, offers another perspective while drawing parallels between the two characters.
07:35 This one hits us in the feels every time.
07:38 "Why can't I do anything right?"
07:45 Number 11. I See Stars
07:47 "Don't be frightened like me. The darker the night, the brighter you shine."
07:53 Attention theater kids, you might want to cover your ears for this bit.
07:57 The final song, as we know it, apparently didn't take shape until Tech.
08:01 They replaced the classic feel-good finale with a gentle introspection, similar to Katie's spring-fling speech in the movie.
08:08 "Fake, easy to break. That's how I used to be."
08:13 "Here, take it."
08:15 We love how it revisits More Is Better, a time when Katie had lost the ability to appreciate something as simple as a star-studded sky.
08:23 But now, she realizes it's up to her to find that beauty in herself and others.
08:27 It's also a cute nod from the writers to their talented cast.
08:31 The number sends its audience away with a message that everyone deserves to shine.
08:35 "I will look out for you. We'll light each other's way."
08:42 Number 10, Stupid With Love
08:44 "I didn't get it. I couldn't get it until now."
08:49 "Do you have an eraser?"
08:50 "I would love to."
08:51 Like Katie, do you find more comfort in solving math problems than calculating matters of the heart?
08:56 This song revolves around her crush on Aaron Samuels, highlighting how, unlike the straightforward logic of math,
09:03 there is no calculator to help her find the answer to her feelings.
09:06 It's adorable and hilarious, making anyone who's ever had a crush feel very seen.
09:11 "I'm astounded and not blust. I am filled with calculus. Does this guy work out? He must. I'll swear to you at the gym."
09:19 Also, let's take a moment to appreciate the brilliance of rhyming nonplussed with calculus.
09:24 The reprise later on marks the pivotal moment when Katie decides to play the "bad at math" card to win over Aaron.
09:31 Oh, and it gives a friendly reminder of the most important day on the Mean Girls calendar.
09:35 "Acting dumb times x equals love."
09:39 "Hey, what's the date?"
09:40 "October 3rd, my new favorite day!"
09:44 Number 9. Meet the Plastics.
09:47 If teen movies featured Bond-like villains, they might sound like Regina George.
09:51 At least, that's what the songwriters envisioned.
09:53 This song smoothly transitions from "Where Do You Belong?" to "Introduce the Plastics."
09:57 "My name is Regina Church, and I am a massive deal."
10:06 Regina kicks things off with a melody that's the prettiest poison you'll ever hear.
10:11 Alluring yet sinister, her composure never wavering.
10:14 Gretchen's part is more erratic, highlighting her eagerness to please.
10:18 "If Regina is the sun, then I'm a disco ball 'cause I'm just as bright and fun if you've had alcohol."
10:24 Lastly, Karen sweetly sings about herself, showcasing her unique charm.
10:29 "I may not be smart, that's it."
10:33 "Thanks, Karen."
10:35 Despite the musical shifts, their harmonies are flawless,
10:38 underscoring the importance of social cohesion to high schoolers.
10:42 The number concludes with the trio inviting Katie to join them for lunch.
10:46 And, of course, on Wednesdays, we wear pink.
10:49 "Say, here's where you belong. Say, here's where you belong."
10:55 "No really, say it."
10:56 Number 8. Where Do You Belong?
10:59 You know that scene where Janis hands Katie a hand-drawn cafeteria map?
11:02 Picture that moment as a classic show tune led by a theater kid.
11:06 "Let's take a walk around the cafeteria, shall we?"
11:08 "Yeah."
11:09 "I'll show you the world as I see it."
11:12 Damien briefs Katie on North Shore's cliques, underlining the importance of finding her place.
11:17 This is among the most classical Broadway numbers in the production.
11:20 The other is also sung by Damien, which is no coincidence.
11:24 He knows where he belongs.
11:25 "We're not exactly joiners, but we'll be good friends to you."
11:31 No classic show tune is complete without a scene-stealing dance break.
11:34 And Damien, supported by the show choir, delivers just that.
11:38 It's a lively, playful tune that might inspire you to summon your own show choir for a kick line,
11:43 or, at the very least, break into some jazz hands.
11:47 "You need protection with pizzazz, and helping hands, but also jazz."
11:54 Number 7. Stop.
11:56 Think back to some of your most regrettable decisions.
11:59 Don't you wish you had someone like Damien telling you to stop before it's too late?
12:03 "It keeps coming out like word vomit. Stop! Eat a cracker and stop."
12:10 "Okay."
12:10 Originally, Act 2 was slated to open with a song named "Bossed Up,"
12:14 showing Katie reveling in her newfound popularity.
12:17 However, as she remains oblivious to the slippery slope ahead,
12:21 it made more sense for her friends to try and open her eyes to it.
12:24 "What have you learned from your worst ideas?"
12:27 "Oh, stop!"
12:28 As more voices join in, the rhyme scheme loosens up,
12:31 reflecting decisions made on a whim rather than thoughtful consideration.
12:35 If their stories don't give you pause, the dance break and lively melody
12:39 will at least distract you long enough to forget about whatever ill-advised decision you were contemplating.
12:45 "Stop! Why did she get me? Stop!"
12:50 Number 6. Revenge Party.
12:52 "Imagine a party with dresses and cake and singing and dancing and cake."
12:58 Is it even a party without dessert?
13:01 In this song, Katie, Janice, and Damien cook up their infamous plan to serve Regina her just desserts.
13:06 The trio decides to end Regina's reign after Katie catches her kissing Aaron,
13:11 and this song encapsulates the highlights of their scheme.
13:13 "It's your revenge party with your two best friends."
13:17 "And I end up with Aaron when she's gone."
13:19 "Yes, Katie."
13:20 We see them mess with Regina's look, expose her infidelity, crack Gretchen,
13:25 and, of course, the iconic "Glen Coco, you go, Glen Coco."
13:29 The song feels like the best, most rocking party that could even encourage
13:33 the least vengeful person to join the action.
13:35 While we may not have ever personally felt victimized by Regina George,
13:39 revenge has never sounded so sweet.
13:41 "A party with revenge is what it's like."
13:49 Number 5. Apex Predator
13:51 "Every food chain has exactly Regina George eat steak."
13:59 In the movie, Katie often draws parallels between her new world and the animal kingdom.
14:04 This song takes that idea, likening Regina's social status to the Apex Predator at the top of the food chain.
14:10 As intensified guitars emphasize Janice's warning,
14:13 Katie begins to see the benefits of belonging to Regina's pride.
14:17 Janice is one of the earliest to voice her desire to topple the status quo
14:21 and have others see Regina for the wolf in sheep's clothing that she is.
14:24 "Like a lioness, only with less fur. Do not mess with her. She's the Apex Predator."
14:33 The song builds up powerfully, with Janice and Katie, despite their differing perspectives,
14:38 uniting to label Regina as the ultimate frenemy.
14:41 Katie can't say that Janice didn't warn her.
14:43 "Will she braid your hair? Will she eat your heart? How can you outsmart?"
14:56 Number 4. Someone Gets Hurt
14:58 If Katie had heeded Janice's caution, we might have missed out on this song and its two reprises.
15:04 "It's fine, 'til someone gets hurt."
15:11 It mirrors the moment Regina betrays Katie by rekindling her relationship with Aaron.
15:16 She uses all sorts of mind games to seduce him, making betrayal look strangely odd.
15:22 Meanwhile, audiences are entranced by the vocal prowess and range needed
15:25 for such a deviously sincere performance.
15:28 "Oh, I can only be your traffic fabulation."
15:34 The dramatic conclusion perfectly sets the tone for Katie's upcoming villain era.
15:38 Regina reprises the number again, straight after Fearless, once the power dynamics have flipped.
15:43 Janice also sings a reprise after learning about Katie's party.
15:47 It marks Katie's complete transformation from someone who gets hurt to the one doing the hurting.
15:52 "Til someone gets hurt. Til someone gets hurt."
16:01 Number 3. Sexy
16:03 "I am dressed up and dream big, disguised as someone else who is not me but is still hot."
16:09 While the movie presents, let's call it, outdated views on how teenage girls choose Halloween costumes,
16:15 the musical takes a more empowering stance.
16:17 Don't worry, Karen's still a mouse, duh.
16:20 However, this song shows more dimensions to her character and gives her the chance to shine,
16:25 all set to a funky dance beat.
16:27 Sure, she feels the pressure of dressing to her peers' expectations,
16:30 but more importantly, Halloween allows her the freedom to be whoever she chooses to be.
16:35 "I can be a sexy doctor and cure some sexy cancer. That's not right, is it?"
16:42 The message is clear. Embracing your sexiness doesn't have to negate your other qualities.
16:47 By the final note, we all feel like we can run the world in shoes we cannot walk in.
16:52 "I can be who I want to be and sex, sex, sex, sex!"
17:03 "I am a sexy mouse."
17:04 Number 2. I'd Rather Be Me
17:08 Raise your right finger if you've ever been betrayed by someone you thought you could trust.
17:13 If your hand is raised, this is the song for you.
17:16 "Cause sometimes what's meant to break you makes you brave."
17:22 In this empowering anthem, Janice rejects societal expectations that pit girls against each other.
17:28 She embraces authenticity, discards the game playing, and sends a powerful message.
17:33 You don't have to cancel yourself out for social acceptance.
17:36 "Let's call our damage even cleanest slate till it's like new. It's a new life for me, for I'd rather be me."
17:43 It's a universal sentiment. We've all been in Janice's shoes. The lyrics, brilliantly penned
17:48 by Benjamin, deliver a liberating truth we all wish we had heard sooner. Plus, it's such a bop.
17:54 It takes everything we have not to climb onto our seats and join in as the ensemble chants Janice's name.
18:00 "I'd rather be me, I'd rather be me, I'd rather be me than be with you."
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18:23 Number 1. Worldburn
18:26 You know those moments of fiery anger when you see Red and start entertaining revenge fantasies?
18:31 Well, then you might just relate to Regina as she enters her ultimate Bond villain-esque era.
18:36 "And in case you're keeping stark, Katie may have won the battle, but I will end the worldburn."
18:44 After discovering Katie double-crossed her, she turns her rage into reality,
18:48 setting North Shore ablaze with the infamous Burn Book. The song rebels against societal
18:53 expectations for women to suppress anger, showcasing Regina's extraordinary defiance.
18:58 "I'm a one-star worldburn and everywhere get me."
19:08 The energy and vocal agility the song demands are next level. A well-performed rendition will
19:13 send chills down your spine. It's the perfect choice to crank up for those revenge fantasy
19:18 levels of anger. It captures the fiery spirit of a woman unabashedly embracing rage and leaving
19:24 chaos in her wake. Which song do you think is the most gruel? Let us know in the comments.
19:37 "Ooh, I gotta go. Mwah!"
19:39 "Um, did she just leave while I was actively caring about her? No.
19:42 Katie Marie Heron, get back here!"
19:44 Do you agree with our picks? Check out this other recent clip from Ms. Mojo.
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19:54 [Music]