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AnimauxTranscription
00:00 I'm literally traumatized I was picking up the cat's toys.
00:04 *crying*
00:06 I almost picked-
00:08 *crying*
00:10 *crying*
00:12 You don't smell like warm kitty.
00:14 *sniffing*
00:16 You smell like-
00:18 *sniffing*
00:20 Stinky.
00:22 *chewing*
00:24 Bowie get away from it!
00:26 Bowie!
00:28 *chewing*
00:30 *sucking*
00:32 *sucking*
00:34 *sucking*
00:36 *sucking*
00:38 Oh my god, Biggs!
00:40 Biggs, you're rolling on it!
00:42 Oh my god, baby boo.
00:44 *crying*
00:46 *sucking*
00:48 *sucking*
00:50 *crying*
00:52 *sniffing*
00:54 I've abandoned my child!
00:56 I've abandoned my boy!
00:58 Attack the D-point!
01:00 Yes!
01:02 Attack the D-point!
01:04 Attack the D-point!
01:06 Attack the D-point!
01:08 I could smell sh*t and I couldn't figure out where it was coming from.
01:10 I was just going to go make myself a coffee.
01:12 My cat has sh*t in the f*cking toaster.
01:18 *snoring*
01:20 *snoring*
01:22 *snoring*
01:24 *snoring*
01:26 So guys, my kitten
01:28 has done this thing, right?
01:30 Where like, anyone touches her kitten
01:32 Yeah, you can look at me and try to judge me
01:34 all day, but at the end of the day, you're just a cat.
01:36 What do you know? You don't know sh*t.
01:38 You wake me up in the morning and try to tell me what to do.
01:40 I know when to feed a cat. I'm a person.
01:42 You can't even watch movies.
01:44 You've never seen Cars? You've seen all the Cars movies.
01:46 You don't know sh*t.
01:48 *farting*
01:50 *farting*
01:52 *farting*
01:54 Are you a male or female?
02:16 I'm a female.
02:18 You're a female?
02:20 *farting*
02:22 *reading names*
02:34 *laughing*
02:48 *laughing*
02:50 You just can't help yourself.
03:06 *laughing*
03:08 *speaking spanish*
03:22 *sad music*
03:34 *sad music*
03:36 You're a kitty.
03:38 You can have a cheeseburger.
03:40 *breathing*
03:42 *cat meowing*
03:46 Oh sh*t!
03:48 Wait, did that just break the monitor?
03:50 *cat meowing*
03:52 Stop! Stop!
03:54 What's that?
04:02 *cat meowing*
04:04 *cat meowing*
04:06 Buddy, I made goulash.
04:08 What do you think?
04:12 Oh, that's insulting.
04:18 It's good.
04:20 *sad music*
04:22 *door creaking*
04:28 *door creaking*
04:30 Well, I'm sorry.
04:36 Okay, bye.
04:38 Sorry, sorry to disturb you.
04:40 *door slams*
04:42 *laughing*
04:44 *laughing*
04:46 *rapping*
04:48 *laughing*
04:54 *laughing*
04:56 Jesus.
05:06 *sad music*
05:08 *fart*
05:16 Excuse me!
05:22 I heard noises.
05:24 Oh, my ear!
05:26 Look what he ate!
05:28 I'm fed up with him!
05:30 You're a villain. Go away!
05:34 Oh no!
05:36 *laughing*
05:38 Stop it, both of you.
05:40 Now you've done it.
05:42 You've made me turn my chair.
05:44 *laughing*
05:50 That's a wide stance, my guy.
05:52 Super solid.
05:54 No one's gonna tip you over.
05:56 They could try, but you'd be like,
05:58 "Nah, this stance is too wide for that."
06:00 Hey, have you seen my-
06:02 Oh.
06:04 Hey man, what's up?
06:06 *sighs*
06:08 It's been so hard these past few weeks.
06:10 My wife's leaving me.
06:12 She's taking all the kids.
06:14 I feel like I have no one.
06:16 You know what that's like, right?
06:18 Yeah.
06:20 Good boy.
06:22 Yo.
06:24 Come on now.
06:28 Move.
06:30 Move.
06:32 *meow*
06:34 *sniff*
06:36 It's wild how you'll have two cats
06:38 and they'll have completely different personalities.
06:40 Like, look how adorable this is.
06:42 I did not put her under this blanket.
06:44 She is just f*cking cute like that.
06:46 We got f*cking big country over here.
06:48 Hey boy.
06:50 *meow*
06:52 *meow*
06:54 *meow*
06:58 *meow*
07:02 *laughs*
07:06 *laughs*
07:12 *laughs*
07:14 *laughs*
07:16 Did you just scoot to get away from me?
07:30 *meow*
07:34 *meow*
07:36 *meow*
07:38 *meow*
07:40 *laughs*
07:42 *laughs*
07:44 *laughs*
07:46 *laughs*
07:48 *laughs*
07:50 *laughs*
07:52 Don't even know what that is.
07:54 Why are you trying to eat it?
07:56 Give it to me.
07:58 It's my ice cream.
08:00 *meow*
08:02 *meow*
08:04 *meow*
08:06 *meow*
08:08 *meow*
08:10 Okay, suede. Too much.
08:16 Hey, too much.
08:18 Why do you keep doing this to yourself?
08:22 Seriously?
08:24 Do you ever let up?
08:28 Excuse you.
08:32 Excuse you.
08:34 I'm trying to make a TikTok here.
08:36 *meow*
08:38 Oh, hey you.
08:42 How dare you?
08:44 We're traveling with my girlfriend's cat.
08:48 And when we do that, we have to give him a pill
08:50 because or else he'll just meow the entire way on the flight.
08:52 And it just kicked in.
08:54 Look at this fool.
08:56 *laughs*
08:58 This guy's tripping.
09:04 Bon voyage.
09:06 *TV playing in the background*
09:34 *speaking in a foreign language*
09:36 This is my cat with the big round eyes filter.
09:52 Let's see what your cat looks like with this filter.
10:02 I'm sorry.
10:04 I'm so sorry.
10:06 My cat has like the most expressive tail
10:12 I've ever seen. Like, just watch.
10:14 Are you the prettiest girl ever?
10:18 Hmm?
10:20 Are you so pretty?
10:22 So I walked in.
10:24 Went to put my shoes in the shoe bin.
10:26 Hey.
10:28 That's not how shoes go.
10:30 Excuse me.
10:32 You love each other.
10:34 I suppose.
10:40 Back you go.
10:42 *laughs*
10:46 See that's the problem right there.
10:48 What is that? The tombinator.
10:50 See the tombinator hooked up to the motor.
10:52 The motor ain't pushing enough pressure out for the gas pedal.
10:54 The gas pedal got a lot of dirt in there.
10:56 If you can look right here,
10:58 you see that dust box?
11:00 *laughs*
11:02 *music*
11:04 (upbeat music)
11:06 you