A woman who made 'sorry you can’t make it' cards for guests who failed to meet the RSVP deadline for a wedding was trolled - by strangers who called it "tacky" and "harsh".
Nishma Mistry, 39, put together a draft message to send to family and friends who fail to RSVP - after seeing the "frustrations" of fellow brides.
Nishma - who has been married for 14 years - runs the Asian bride Sorority and was constantly hearing from brides irritated by guests who hadn’t let them know if they were attending their wedding.
Nishma Mistry, 39, put together a draft message to send to family and friends who fail to RSVP - after seeing the "frustrations" of fellow brides.
Nishma - who has been married for 14 years - runs the Asian bride Sorority and was constantly hearing from brides irritated by guests who hadn’t let them know if they were attending their wedding.
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FunTranscript
00:00 So I posted this over the weekend and it's created quite a debate. Some people
00:07 have been saying that it's passive-aggressive, some people are saying
00:10 it's just plain rude, some people have said it's tacky and I totally appreciate
00:15 all of these opinions. Some people have said it's not that hard to just call
00:20 your guests up and to see if they're actually coming and I all of these
00:24 opinions are totally totally valid. The bit that gets tricky is if you are
00:30 planning a large wedding, so hear me out here because I know there will be people
00:34 who will be like why are you planning a large wedding if you don't know the
00:36 people why are you inviting them? Culturally with South Asian weddings you
00:41 tend to end up having approximately three to five events across the span of
00:46 a week, sometimes a couple of weeks and when you have so many events you are
00:51 also dealing with probably close to 200 to 500 guests. Now culturally in the
00:58 South Asian culture RSVPing is a bit of a new concept it's probably only really
01:04 caught on in the last 10 to 15 years and culturally they are particularly bad, I
01:10 know I'm generalizing so don't kill me for that, but they are particularly bad
01:14 at RSVPing. I don't know what it is, I don't know if it's an etiquette
01:19 that's not quite embedded culturally and so what you end up finding is that
01:24 people just forget to RSVP, they get the invite they just forget and I appreciate
01:30 some people say oh the RSVP might have got lost in the mail, however
01:34 in a day and age where you have text message, email, whatsapp, social media,
01:39 there are multiple ways to RSVP, it doesn't always have to be a postcard
01:45 that gets sent back and in most cases I would say people aren't even doing that
01:49 anymore because they know it's a waste, it's a waste putting a stamp on it and
01:52 then it doesn't get sent back. So I think as harsh as this does sound and yes
01:58 there could be nicer ways to phrase it, I mean I didn't send this out on my
02:01 wedding, I'm just, this is just an idea that's been put out there, but yes it
02:05 could sound a bit harsh but I also think if somebody got this they would not
02:10 forget to RSVP the next time, they would download, be sure they would RSVP. Let me
02:16 know your thoughts.