Esquire sits down and chats with GomBurZa star Cedrick Juan to talk about his transition from stage to screen, his portrayal of Padre Burgos and the emotional moment of winning the Best Actor trophy.
Read the cover story here: https://tinyurl.com/2pbh3bfm
Read the cover story here: https://tinyurl.com/2pbh3bfm
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00:00 I was questioning myself, I was questioning my craft.
00:03 It was like an existential crisis.
00:05 I was like, "What is the significance of our work to society?"
00:10 Because I started in theatre, we never worked for fame, we never worked for awards.
00:26 Well, we are eight siblings.
00:30 So I'm the second.
00:32 So our gaps are just a little close.
00:35 I grew up in Arpapa, Manila.
00:38 I studied at Santo Parroquial School.
00:40 Then in 1997, we transferred to Bulacan, to Santa Maria, Bulacan.
00:45 My father is from there, and my mother is from Manila.
00:48 So, elementary to high school, I think I missed two things.
00:54 One, I was a varsity chess player in our school.
00:57 So from 5am, we started training my coach, Kuya Carlo, to dance.
01:03 I also danced at the same time.
01:06 I think that time, we were still dancing more on techno dances and more modern dances.
01:12 The first thing I remember, that became my experience in acting, was
01:22 my first year in college, because there are junior colleges in mass communication.
01:26 By the way, I graduated from mass communication.
01:28 They need to mount theatre play for their theatre subjects.
01:33 So I auditioned for the play "Moulin Rouge!"
01:37 So since high school, I've been dancing until college.
01:42 They got me to be a partner of the Can-Can Girls.
01:46 Then after that, I was in my third year of college, that's when I really entered the theatre.
01:51 My first mentor invited me to do that.
01:55 His name is Joey Biting.
01:58 Since then, I've been doing theatre.
02:01 Definitely, I would love to be part of Love, Diaz films.
02:13 And also, Brilliante Mendoza, Eric Mati, and also our directors.
02:21 There are so many great directors, like Peter Zanvargas.
02:26 And also, senior actors, especially those I look up to, like Tito Joel Torre, Noni Bencamino.
02:35 Because they're the ones who came home from the theatre.
02:37 And also, rest in peace to Tito Eddie Garcia,
02:40 I learned that they're really hands-on in their work.
02:45 They give their heart even off-cam.
02:47 I think the most important thing in our work is not just in the entertainment industry,
02:53 but in any industry, our work ethics, and our relationship with our colleagues.
03:00 That's the most important thing.
03:01 Because there are many good people in all aspects of work, in all industries.
03:06 But sometimes, we tend to not want to work because it's not pleasant or easy.
03:11 We want to work because we're willing to learn, but it's also good to be with our colleagues.
03:19 So, those are the things I aspire to do in my work.
03:22 I think we all got affected by the pandemic, right?
03:32 In 2020, we all have a core memory of how devastated we felt.
03:40 We couldn't work like the usual.
03:44 We couldn't meet our friends, hang out with our friends, our families, and our loved ones.
03:49 We couldn't do anything.
03:50 So, during that time, I can still remember that I was questioning myself, I was questioning my craft.
03:59 It was like an existential crisis.
04:01 I was like, "What's the significance of our work in society?"
04:06 Because we were limited in what we could do, right?
04:10 We were more focused on media, medical work, and other things.
04:20 We were only thinking about food and basic needs.
04:26 We were just trying to survive.
04:27 We just wanted to survive the pandemic.
04:29 So, I was thinking about our purpose in life, especially with what's happening in the world.
04:38 For quite a while, it was depressing for me.
04:42 Because in the entertainment industry, we couldn't do anything.
04:47 Just to kill time, I listened to music.
04:50 Sometimes, I danced.
04:51 I watched movies, I watched films, and series so that I could sleep and doze off.
04:58 Then I realized, "Ah, that's it!"
05:00 Whenever we feel something, it can be any emotion.
05:05 We listen to music, we dance, whenever we want to bond with our families or friends,
05:12 we watch a movie or binge-watch at home.
05:18 So, that's the significance of art.
05:20 It's part of our daily emotions.
05:25 It's an extension of our expressions and feelings whenever we listen.
05:32 If we don't want to say what we feel verbally,
05:36 we listen to music.
05:39 I realized that what we're doing is still significant.
05:44 It's just that there's a pandemic that we can't move around.
05:47 But slowly, we're driving again.
05:51 Then, here comes the audition for "Padre Burgos."
05:55 So, that was the initial offer to audition for "La Madrid."
05:59 As an actor, I always practice looking for a script
06:03 so that I could understand the emotional arc of the character
06:07 and what the character will feel in the film.
06:10 [music]
06:16 [laughs]
06:18 Whenever they ask me, from all the several interviews and even pocket interviews from media people,
06:28 whenever they ask me, "What can you feel like?"
06:32 People who watch the film, from the special screening,
06:35 they keep on saying that my fight for the Best Actor Award is strong.
06:40 So, because I started in theater, we never worked for fame.
06:45 We never worked for awards.
06:47 Why?
06:48 Because we feel that if that's our goal,
06:51 the significance and sense of our role in society will be lost.
06:59 And that's to inspire, to tell stories.
07:03 So, if your focus is about fame and award,
07:07 there's a tendency to always perform as if you want to get something after that.
07:14 So, that's why I always say that I don't want to expect.
07:17 So that I don't feel too disappointed,
07:21 and I don't have too many expectations.
07:23 Then, the glamour of the film comes from the people.
07:28 From 39 cinemas when MMFF started, we reached 133 cinemas.
07:34 Because of their reviews, because of their love,
07:38 they see that the story is still relevant.
07:42 That's what's rewarding for us, for the team of Gumburza.
07:46 And for me, it's a bonus.
07:48 That's what I really said, that if ever I get the award, it's a bonus for me.
07:55 And somehow, it's also a validation of my craft.
07:58 I really said, "Okay, fine, Lord."
08:01 Because they keep on feeding me that if ever I win, and so on.
08:05 I said, "Why not?"
08:07 Maybe sometimes, we can be too literal in what we're praying for, right?
08:13 So, I said, "Okay, why not, Lord?
08:15 Just now, if ever you give it to me."
08:19 I said, "I will use my platform, my craft to widen my knowledge and also to inspire more people with my craft."
08:32 I said, "Why not?"
08:34 But if not, it's okay.
08:36 Because it's just a bonus.
08:39 Then, they called all the nominees.
08:41 I said, "Oh my God, there's a nomination."
08:45 And of course, the ones that got chosen were our seasoned veteran actors.
08:50 So, Piolo Pascual, Ding Dong Dantes, Derek Ramsey, Alden Richards, and Mr. Christopher DeLeon.
08:58 It was like, "Oh my God."
08:59 Then, as I said, it was really 5 Goliaths and 1 David.
09:04 Then, I also called my name.
09:06 I just said it to myself while I was walking because I was so excited to go to the stage.
09:11 I really said to myself, "I need to not forget the people I need to thank."
09:16 That's the most important thing.
09:17 Because I can't do that if we're not together.
09:22 Because I always treat my work as ensemble work.
09:25 So, as much as possible, I want to thank everyone.
09:29 But when I'm about to step on the stairs, I couldn't avoid my emotions.
09:34 My voice was breaking so much.
09:37 I was holding my tears in my mouth.
09:41 But I still have a lot of things to thank.
09:44 True enough, I still forgot a few things.
09:46 But I tried to compose myself because I also want to ally it with the injustices that happened.
09:56 Not just in the Philippines, but in the world.
09:57 That award.
09:58 [Music]