Dr.Saleem Or Agha Majid Ki Chali Gai Yaadasht, Azeem Vikky Ko Sar Ka Dard Karna Parega Bardasht
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00:00 "Hoshiyaariyaan, Hoshiyaariyaan"
00:02 Hello, viewers. I am Haroon Rafiq and you are watching Hoshiyaariyaan.
00:06 Friends, in our daily lives, we prioritize certain things.
00:10 We attach value to certain things.
00:12 For example, if we see a food item with a brand written on it
00:17 that we like a lot, we attach a value to it.
00:20 It will be great.
00:21 Whether it is a dessert or a food item.
00:23 In life, when we need an employee
00:27 or a friend, or a life partner,
00:32 or if we are in search of anything or anyone,
00:35 we attach value to certain things.
00:37 Normally, we have seen that people attach a lot of value to talent.
00:41 People attach a lot of value to money.
00:43 People attach a lot of value to education.
00:46 We see parents and they also matter.
00:49 But today, I want to request you.
00:51 I have learnt that the most important thing in life is sincerity.
00:57 It is sincerity.
00:59 It is good intentions.
01:00 It is purity. It is honesty.
01:03 If you are looking for a friend, leave everything and focus on sincerity.
01:07 He is sincere with you.
01:09 If you are looking for a spouse, focus on sincerity.
01:14 This is something that makes all the lights go out.
01:19 The value of everything goes out.
01:21 And insincerity is such a terrible thing
01:24 that if you are insincere despite having everything,
01:29 then everything is ruined.
01:32 So, for friends, employees, anyone,
01:36 the most important thing is sincerity.
01:40 Let's start today's show with this message.
01:43 Let's take you to the clinic and see what the doctor is doing.
01:46 Tell me why there is red syrup in the drip.
01:49 It's fasting time.
01:51 (LAUGHTER)
01:52 (APPLAUSE)
01:55 -The patients who come here... -Yes.
01:57 ...they have a problem with their stomach.
01:59 Because when they start fasting,
02:01 they don't remember their parents or their mother.
02:03 They only remember samosas and fritters.
02:05 Doctor, why do they become lazy?
02:07 Look, our blood gets thicker with food.
02:11 -Then we don't get this. -No.
02:13 Doctor, I have a problem.
02:15 You have enough. You can't eat one.
02:17 (LAUGHTER)
02:19 Doctor, the problem is that when I sleep after fasting,
02:21 I feel like the food is coming up.
02:23 -What should I do? -Stand up after eating.
02:26 (LAUGHTER)
02:27 You should walk 70-72 steps after eating.
02:30 Why 70-72?
02:31 To go and pray for the doctor at 72 steps.
02:34 Yes.
02:35 -I have seen your show. -Really?
02:37 You are so good.
02:39 You cure half the patients.
02:41 -Yes. -Do you see that?
02:42 -Yes. -I will bring your show
02:44 when you do the operation.
02:46 (LAUGHTER)
02:47 We will pay the fees.
02:49 What is the fee? How much do you charge?
02:52 -What is the fee? -Rs. 5000.
02:53 -They pay it by crying. -Oh!
02:56 I am a neurosurgeon.
02:58 -He is a neurosurgeon. -Oh!
02:59 (LAUGHTER)
03:00 Neurosurgeons are his surgeons.
03:02 No, he is a neurosurgeon.
03:05 (LAUGHTER)
03:06 Have you seen neurosurgeons?
03:08 -They are people of the mind. -Yes.
03:10 You are making fun of me. I am not.
03:11 I have taken degrees. You are laughing.
03:13 Doctor, I think someone has died here.
03:16 Flat lines are coming.
03:17 No one has got the flat lines.
03:19 No, they haven't.
03:20 Then the engine will start. The bed will be in pain.
03:22 (LAUGHTER)
03:23 Is the 84-year-old woman getting a pulse from the bed?
03:25 (LAUGHTER)
03:26 -The patient in the back is going. -How?
03:29 I had brought him here.
03:31 (LAUGHTER)
03:32 I had brought him here to do blood pressure.
03:35 (LAUGHTER)
03:36 (PHONE RINGS)
03:38 Hello. Yes, Mahira.
03:39 We will meet at the canteen during the iftar.
03:41 Mahira.
03:42 Is this a hospital?
03:44 Why don't you let your patients come?
03:46 I have called you 24 hours.
03:48 -The bed is empty. -What do you mean?
03:51 (LAUGHTER)
03:52 Do you know who the patient is?
03:55 No, I know.
03:56 -Sorry. -You keep calling me 24 hours.
03:59 -I have heard the phone. -No.
04:01 I will tell you. I will tell you.
04:04 I will tell you. I will not die.
04:06 You will not touch me.
04:08 I will not touch you no matter what.
04:11 You are late.
04:13 You should have told him the day he came to the job.
04:16 I have kept the bed ready since morning.
04:19 Sir, the patient is not trying to explain.
04:20 He is opening the bed.
04:22 He is telling me to look at it.
04:24 He is trying to tickle me. I told him to look at it.
04:26 I told him that he will come again.
04:29 I will open the bed for him.
04:30 (LAUGHTER)
04:31 -Okay. -Yes.
04:32 Let's do general service.
04:33 (LAUGHTER)
04:35 I am asking you why you are listening to the phone.
04:37 -Sir, I heard the phone. -You are a doctor.
04:41 You are listening to the PCO.
04:42 Is this a place to listen to the phone?
04:44 -Sorry, sir. -The patient is lying here.
04:45 You... Shut up!
04:47 I will show you.
04:50 -Oh! -Oh!
04:55 Check what has happened to me.
04:58 Sir, you said that you will not touch me.
05:01 I will not touch you.
05:02 I will go and get a doctor.
05:04 Listen, you can even cure a leg.
05:06 (LAUGHTER)
05:09 What happened, sir?
05:10 I am absolutely fine, Mr. Shakir. How are you?
05:12 I think you sang a song in the show 'Huchiyariya'.
05:17 (LAUGHTER)
05:19 -Yes. -Greetings.
05:21 -Greetings. -Are you a doctor?
05:22 -Yes, sir. -Okay.
05:24 Listen to me. What do you want?
05:27 I have everything ready.
05:28 (LAUGHTER)
05:29 Listen.
05:31 Sir, I want samosa, chutney, chickpeas, everything.
05:34 (LAUGHTER)
05:36 Please sit.
05:39 -Who are you? -I am a patient.
05:41 What is your problem?
05:43 I don't remember what my problem is.
05:45 -Okay. -Remember.
05:47 It can be a problem.
05:48 One minute.
05:49 -I will tell you. -He has written it.
05:52 Give it to me.
05:53 It is a memory problem, doctor.
05:57 -Oh, forgetfulness. -Yes.
05:59 -What is your name? -I don't remember.
06:02 You must have written it somewhere. Check.
06:05 Yes, Dr. Sajidullah Khan.
06:10 -Dr. Sajidullah Khan? -Yes.
06:12 -I was waiting for you. -Yes.
06:15 I have got a wound on my brain.
06:17 (LAUGHTER)
06:19 Please check me.
06:20 No, I am sorry. I knew you were in an emergency.
06:24 I had a lot of patients.
06:26 -It happens. -Yes.
06:28 -Please check me. -Come here.
06:30 I am in pain. I feel dizzy.
06:32 -I feel dizzy. -Come here.
06:34 (LAUGHTER)
06:35 (GIGGLES)
06:36 (GROANS)
06:39 The doctor has cured me.
06:41 (LAUGHTER)
06:42 Oh.
06:45 -Oh. -Do you have a problem?
06:48 (LAUGHTER)
06:49 You have two hair in your brain.
06:54 (LAUGHTER)
06:55 Open your mouth.
06:57 Your lower teeth have worms and the upper one is eating.
07:03 (LAUGHTER)
07:04 -Does it hurt? -Yes.
07:07 Yes. It's because of the worms.
07:10 -What? -Because of the worms?
07:12 Yes.
07:13 (LAUGHTER)
07:14 Come here.
07:15 -Oh. -She is sitting on the other seat.
07:21 Doctor, you have a thick bedsheet.
07:24 Are you a doctor from abroad?
07:26 (LAUGHTER)
07:27 Forget my name. Tell me your name.
07:30 I don't remember my name.
07:32 Oh.
07:33 You have an X-ray on the printer paper.
07:35 (LAUGHTER)
07:36 I thought you were cutting your nose.
07:40 That's why you have a scissor in your brain.
07:42 (LAUGHTER)
07:43 No. I don't remember my name.
07:46 You must have it somewhere.
07:49 Yes.
07:51 Yes. Dr. Sajidullah Khan.
07:55 -Oh. You are Dr. Sajidullah Khan? -Yes.
07:58 Doctor, I came to see you.
08:00 Where were you?
08:02 What's your problem?
08:03 Doctor, I forget things.
08:05 -Oh. -Oh.
08:06 This is your mental problem. Come here.
08:08 (LAUGHTER)
08:09 (APPLAUSE)
08:10 Oh, God. What's happening?
08:15 I think I have a mental problem too.
08:18 Do you get dizzy?
08:21 Yes. I get dizzy.
08:23 My heart is weak.
08:25 -Do you have a fever? -Yes.
08:26 I had a Sri Lanka fever the other day.
08:28 (LAUGHTER)
08:29 Okay.
08:30 Do you brush your teeth like this?
08:33 It's a broom.
08:35 (LAUGHTER)
08:36 You have your own hair in your eyes.
08:39 (LAUGHTER)
08:40 Oh.
08:43 Don't worry. Don't worry.
08:46 Worries make everything.
08:49 Come here. Come.
08:51 Come here.
08:53 Come. In the name of God.
08:55 Oh. I don't know what diseases you have.
09:00 What's your problem?
09:03 (LAUGHTER)
09:05 Before coming to you,
09:07 I have consulted a doctor.
09:10 (LAUGHTER)
09:11 Forget about the doctor.
09:12 Tell me what your problem is.
09:15 The doctor who checked me here,
09:17 I told him that I have a forgetfulness problem.
09:20 -A forgetfulness problem? -Yes.
09:22 Okay. Tell me his name.
09:24 I can't remember his name.
09:27 He must have written it somewhere.
09:29 Dr. Sajidullah Khan.
09:31 Dr. Sajidullah Khan?
09:32 Where did you go?
09:34 (LAUGHTER)
09:35 Doctor, I feel dizzy. I am in pain.
09:41 Come here.
09:42 (LAUGHTER)
09:43 What a house you have built.
09:47 -Oh. -This is the plan.
09:49 Oh.
09:50 What did you eat in the morning?
09:52 I had a walk in the morning. I had three parathas.
09:55 -Hmm. -Half a kilo of curd.
09:57 -Hmm. -A little sugar.
09:58 One cup of tea.
09:59 Make a bill. How much will it cost?
10:01 (LAUGHTER)
10:03 I think this is very exaggerated.
10:05 You have put such a small table and you have lost your memory.
10:08 Yes, this is exaggerated.
10:09 Otherwise, the memory that is lost,
10:11 some memories are lost because
10:13 the brain deliberately creates this disease in itself.
10:17 -Oh. -Oh.
10:18 That is because some accidents happen in life with humans.
10:22 God forbid, it happens with someone.
10:23 Especially, the people who go to war.
10:25 The armies that are fighting wars in the world,
10:28 they see some such scenes or such traumas of life
10:32 that the brain wants to erase that much memory of that period.
10:37 -Hmm. -Remove it.
10:39 So, it deliberately destroys your memory.
10:42 When it does this, for a long time,
10:45 because there are two registers in the brain,
10:47 there are two memory registers.
10:49 One has old memories.
10:51 One has all the things that are happening now.
10:54 So, it registers in the present.
10:57 You must have seen Deja Vu.
10:58 -Hmm. -Hmm.
11:00 What happens is that your brain, by mistake,
11:02 the things of the present memory,
11:04 which should go to the present register,
11:06 it puts them in the past register by mistake.
11:08 -Oh. -Oh.
11:09 So, you feel that because you are retrieving from the past,
11:12 -you have seen it. -You have seen it.
11:14 You have not seen it.
11:15 So, for a long time, the brain does this,
11:17 it shuts down the memory of the present.
11:20 Hmm.
11:21 Now, I will give you medicine if you keep quiet.
11:24 (ALL LAUGHING)
11:26 When does the world remain quiet?
11:28 Let it say what it says.
11:30 Oh, wow.
11:31 Come.
11:32 Come.
11:33 Come.
11:36 What is your name?
11:39 Dr. Sajidullah Khan.
11:41 Hey, this is my name.
11:44 Dr. Sajidullah Khan.
11:45 Oh, doctor, how are you? Are you fine?
11:47 How are you? What is your temperament?
11:49 (ALL LAUGHING)
11:51 Nowadays, doctor, you are a very cold sweet.
11:54 (ALL LAUGHING)
11:55 I had three to four patients in the morning,
11:58 all three or four were of the brain.
11:59 (ALL LAUGHING)
12:01 (ALL APPLAUDING)
12:02 -Oh, my God. -Thank God, the first customer has come.
12:05 -Just relax. -In fact, double high.
12:08 Oh, wow.
12:09 -Greetings, doctor. -Greetings.
12:11 Atif, son, don't do comedy. You are a patient.
12:13 (ALL LAUGHING)
12:15 Please, please, keep quiet.
12:16 Doctor, this is a routine check-up.
12:18 -Do another check-up. -Yes, yes.
12:19 He is so sick in routine.
12:21 (ALL LAUGHING)
12:22 Is this a routine check-up?
12:23 He has only one disease.
12:24 He has a headache for 24 hours.
12:26 He has a headache for half of his life.
12:27 No, no, sometimes it is here, sometimes it is here, sometimes it is here.
12:30 -Cluster headache. -Oh, my God.
12:32 He has a headache for 24 hours.
12:34 I don't know where to get it.
12:36 I have written it down, Dr. Sajidullah Khan.
12:38 I have written Sadaqat Ali Khan over there.
12:40 (ALL LAUGHING)
12:41 -Where will I get it? -No, no, no.
12:43 -This is the one, Mr. Sajid. -You have to get it.
12:45 -This is our doctor. You are late. -You have to get it.
12:47 Okay, you won't get these shoes and socks.
12:51 (ALL LAUGHING)
12:53 -Look at the doctor. -Oh, God.
12:55 -Son. -Yes.
12:56 Son, can you stop breathing for two minutes?
12:57 I am checking.
12:59 (ALL LAUGHING)
13:00 What happened, son?
13:02 -Oh, God. -What happened?
13:05 It is not a big problem.
13:07 -Actually.. -Don't say that.
13:08 His stomach is bloated.
13:10 -Why? -I think he ate Paratha with the pan.
13:14 (ALL LAUGHING)
13:14 He has no problem, son.
13:16 -He has made it by tilting the belt. -Dad.
13:18 Do it like this.
13:20 Now breathe.
13:21 -Are you feeling better now? -Yes, I am feeling much better.
13:25 Get up, son. You won't get this much tired.
13:26 Come on.
13:28 (ALL LAUGHING)
13:29 Where is his file?
13:31 Doctor, that is the file of your assistant.
13:34 Where did you keep the file?
13:37 (ALL LAUGHING)
13:40 What work do you want to do here?
13:41 You have a patient.
13:42 I have regular check-ups here.
13:45 Where is his file?
13:46 I don't have it in my mind.
13:48 (ALL LAUGHING)
13:49 Keep it in your mind.
13:51 What work is this?
13:52 -Your talent is very good. -Yes.
13:54 -He is sitting with his assistant. -Yes.
13:56 How did you sit here?
13:57 -Like you. -And we are sitting properly.
14:00 (ALL LAUGHING)
14:02 -Sister. -Yes.
14:03 Your file is here and there. It will come. Come tomorrow.
14:06 -Yes. -Is it a routine check-up?
14:07 -Yes. -It's nothing.
14:08 A patient can tolerate pain for a day.
14:10 Okay.
14:11 -Come. -We will get the check-up done tomorrow.
14:12 -Thank you. -Yes.
14:13 When you come tomorrow, bring the file.
14:15 Where is the file?
14:16 Doctor, it was your assistant's call.
14:18 -You gave the file to him. -I gave the file to you.
14:20 (ALL LAUGHING)
14:21 -Gabal. -Get lost.
14:23 I will sit here and give you the clinic.
14:25 You are giving me the file.
14:26 (ALL LAUGHING)
14:27 Doctor, my head is aching.
14:30 Come there.
14:32 (ALL LAUGHING)
14:36 -Dude. -Lie down.
14:38 -Come, doctor. -Yes.
14:41 -Dr. Haseeb. -You don't want it, right?
14:43 -Yes. -Come.
14:44 Who is he?
14:45 Sir, he is Dr. Haseeb.
14:47 He is the biggest neurosurgeon in the city.
14:49 I see.
14:51 I didn't hear his name.
14:52 Sir, he is the one who did the brain transplant
14:55 of half of his head in the rabbit.
14:57 He ate half of the rabbit.
14:59 (ALL LAUGHING)
15:00 Hello, Sajid. How are you?
15:01 Yes, doctor. I am fine.
15:03 What happened to you? You are a doctor.
15:05 Doctor, I have some problem.
15:08 -Some... -Sir, he has a head injury.
15:10 -Yes. -He has a head injury?
15:12 Why are you lying here?
15:13 I checked two patients. I got up.
15:15 (ALL LAUGHING)
15:17 -It's a memory problem. -Yes, sir.
15:18 The injury is the reason.
15:20 -He will be fine now. -Okay.
15:22 Who are you? I didn't recognize you.
15:24 I am a senior doctor here.
15:26 No, sir. He is not a senior doctor. He is a patient.
15:29 My in-laws gave me this job.
15:30 (ALL LAUGHING)
15:31 Tell me the truth. Who are you?
15:33 I am a doctor.
15:34 You are not a doctor. Tell me who you are.
15:36 -Remember. -What kind of doctor is he?
15:40 One minute. I don't remember.
15:42 I have a memory problem.
15:48 -Okay. -You are a patient too?
15:50 -Yes. -Sit. I will check you too.
15:52 Okay.
15:53 Come here. Sit.
15:54 -Ramesh. -Yes, sir.
15:59 Take Dr. Sajid's vitals.
16:00 I don't want to give my vitals.
16:03 (ALL LAUGHING)
16:04 I don't want to give.
16:05 -How old are you? -60 years.
16:07 -Do you smoke? -I don't smoke.
16:09 -Blood pressure? -No. I don't have blood pressure.
16:11 -Sugar? -I don't have sugar.
16:13 -Greetings. -Greetings.
16:22 You seem to be a very good and competent doctor.
16:24 You handled the situation as soon as you came.
16:26 What situation?
16:27 The situation on your right.
16:29 I think it's not a big deal for him.
16:31 What is it?
16:38 What do you want?
16:40 (ALL LAUGHING)
16:41 Doctor, it's been three months. He doesn't pay the rent.
16:44 (ALL LAUGHING)
16:45 Doctor, what is your name?
16:48 Dr. Sajidullah Khan.
16:51 (ALL LAUGHING)
16:52 Ladies and gentlemen, a short break.
16:56 We'll meet again after the break.
16:59 I don't find this cabbage to be so fresh.
17:01 Look at it. Can't you see? It's right in front of you.
17:04 -Show me the quality. -You don't know.
17:06 I can't touch the vegetables.
17:08 That's very good that you can't touch it.
17:10 -Show me. -I can touch it.
17:12 No, no. Don't touch it.
17:13 -Tell me what you want. -Show me two cabbages.
17:17 Why don't you let me touch it?
17:19 You go to the market and ask for your father's father's price.
17:21 So you're my father's son.
17:24 (ALL LAUGHING)
17:25 (audience laughing)