7 More Video Game Bosses That Forced You To Cheat
Join Jules and James as they take look at more video game bosses that forced you to cheat! When bosses don't play fair.
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00:00Hello all of you little demons, Jules here for whatculture.com, back again with another
00:04episode of the awesomely named and awfully hosted Choose Your Own Adventure, the weekly
00:09medieval themed format where I, the Crown Jules of whatculture.com, take a list chosen
00:14by you.
00:15Yes, you, the person who has to apologise to James Dowers, I'm very sorry mate, I'm
00:18giving this to you on a Monday to go out on Tuesday, but I've been off last week because
00:22I got the vid, yay!
00:25It sucks, um, triple vaxxed and still managed to get it and it still kicked my ass.
00:31Fantastic, so apologies if my delivery's a little bit off today, I'm still recovering.
00:35Yes, you get to decide what list I dole out to you each and every week, and this week
00:40we have none other to thank than Jackson Loveless for their suggestion of eight video game bosses
00:48that would absolutely make you crush your controller.
00:51Now obviously I had to do a bit of YouTube tinkering and what I thought I'd do is do
00:54a sequel to a video that went out on our channel quite recently, which was video game
00:59bosses that were so unfair, tough, and just downright stinky that they forced you to cheat,
01:05but then condensed the title somewhat.
01:07So let's get on with it, as I'm Jules, this is whatculture.com, and these are seven
01:10more video game bosses that forced you to cheat.
01:14And you know the drill by now, say hi to me here in the live chat and put your suggestions
01:17for next week's episode down in the comment section below, now let's get on with this
01:20rather stinky list.
01:23Number seven, total nuclear disarmament.
01:26Metal Gear Solid V, The Phantom Pain.
01:28Now while you might be expecting the Metal Gear portion of this list to be taken up by
01:33the likes of, I don't know, the internal clock manipulations, seeing an end to the
01:37end, or the fact that you can put an auto-input to just punch Liquid Snake's face right
01:42off, those are indeed cheats in a way, but what we're going to be talking about today
01:47is an actually impossible boss that was only recently discovered in Metal Gear Solid V,
01:52and that was Konami themselves.
01:54So to better explain, we need to discuss the secret total nuclear disarmament ending of
01:59this game, and I use heavy quotations around the word secret, because it was an ending
02:03that actually exposed itself by accident thanks to an update resetting game data, causing
02:08it to trigger.
02:09Now normally this ending would only unlock if every single active player chose to remove
02:13nuclear warheads from their base, thus ensuring a peaceful future for humanity, and was done
02:19by Hideo Kojima and his team as a thumbing gesture to the world that this would likely
02:23never happen.
02:24Yet we gamers are a persistent sort, and so a massive collaboration of players grouped
02:28together to make this dream a reality.
02:31Yet they hit a snag recently when they realised that the ending could never actually be obtained
02:35legitimately thanks to a series of nukes not actually existing to any tangible player.
02:40You see, scores of warheads apparently existed in the game data, but could never be removed,
02:45meaning that this feat was actually and quite literally impossible, which in turn led players
02:50to resort to the same tactics as the devs and cheated their way through to unlock the
02:54ending.
02:55Peace, it seems, was never an option.
02:57That's quite worrying, isn't it?
02:596.
03:00The Sandman
03:01Spider-Man for the nays.
03:02Now when it comes to boss battles that force players to spam low kicks and punches over
03:08and over again as they hide in a corner, then many people are going to think of Shadow Link
03:12from The Legend of Zelda 2, but today we're going to go to a different area of the NES
03:19library and talk about the absolute shin-stabbing actions that came when you battled the Sandman
03:25in Spider-Man for the nays.
03:27Now this was a title that, while not being nays difficult, was full of the jank that
03:32many had come to expect from the console's output.
03:35Iffy controls, enemies that start shooting at you off screen, and of course a run cycle
03:39that turned Peter Parker into a power walker rather than a superhero.
03:43Now the Sandman boss battle is normally a rather intense one, with the criminal merging
03:48into the floor and then appearing in front of you to turn you into today's special
03:51of awful served in spandex.
03:53However, if you do just, well, everything that Spider-Man would never do in this instance
03:58aka just stand still, hold crouch and beat the piss out of Sandman's groin over and
04:02over, you'll be done in no time.
04:04It might not be heroic to smash somebody's plums over and over, but it definitely gets
04:09the job done, and while it might not be considered cheating by some because you don't need to
04:14put in any inputs, you are exploiting the game's AI considerably here by just standing
04:19and just hammering away on that groin.
04:22Come on then, ball back!
04:25He's just there like, oh god.
04:265.
04:27The Mimic Tear, Elden Ring
04:29Now while I would love to freely address the rather FromSoft-shaped elephant in the room
04:34and say that every boss that the developer made is very likely to want to make you cheat
04:40your way through or just grab a cheese platter and fromage your way through every single
04:45encounter, there is actually one recent example that I just found too hilarious that I just
04:50had to include.
04:51I'm speaking of course about the absolutely beautiful bastard that is the Mimic Tear mini-boss
04:56that you can find within the gargantuan thigh slapper known as Elden Ring, for depending
05:01on how you approach this fight it can be one of the hardest, or alternatively, also
05:05one so easy that it's almost laughable.
05:07For you see, dear Tarnish, the Mimic Tear is exactly that, a mimic that will copy your
05:12exact loadout, spells and all, and then use them against you with surprising aggression.
05:18Now if you've entered the fight with a ton of tanky armour and swords that utterly melt
05:21bosses, you're going to be on the rather spicy end this time around, but if you're
05:26a smart little cheater and start the fight absolutely naked, then you'll experience
05:30something entirely different.
05:32Spawning in with only a loincloth as protection, the Mimic Tear can easily be bested by quickly
05:36re-equipping your gear and then slamming it into the ground, thus making this battle absolutely
05:41hilarious and turning what would be tears of frustration into tears of joy rolling down
05:46your cheek as you laugh at the poor old Mimic Tear just flailing against you with its fists.
05:51It's trying to do a Spider-Man against the Sandman, except this time instead of made
05:53of sand, you're made of absolute beef.
05:55Oh god I said it, here he comes, BEEF GATES, NO!
06:00Alright mate, haven't seen you in a while.
06:02You're attacking, somebody's not feeling very well, how does that make you feel?
06:05Number 4, Cromorax the Invincible, Borderlands
06:08So after the rather disappointing final boss of the original Borderlands base experience,
06:13the fanbase was very keen for something to sink their teeth into.
06:17Or should that be for something to sink its teeth into them, who knows, and thus a petition
06:21went out for Gearbox to provide a real challenge.
06:24And boy howdy did they do that with the raid boss Cromorax the Invincible that appeared
06:29in the General Nox DLC, because this, well it made you feel very, very, invincible.
06:35However as the well known and totally real saying goes, you're only as hard to kill
06:39as there are a number of hidden ledges in your boss area, and Cromorax truly fell foul
06:44of just such a hidden pocket of pain.
06:47Normally any fight against this beast would be one of blind panic, with only those tipping
06:51the level cap and with outrageous weaponry able to stand toe to claw, yet thanks to a
06:55tiny little ledge to the left of the arena, players could both shoot at and not be hit
07:00by Cromorax's damaging projectiles, thus it became a battle of attrition and whether
07:04or not you'd actually brought enough bullets to the fight.
07:07They even referenced the power of the ledge in a subsequent Borderlands game saying that
07:10it was the true hero of the battle and I have to bloody well agree with them.
07:14And people wonder where I came up with the whole big ledge thing.
07:17It's not this by the way, but still, this is a big ledge indeed.
07:203.
07:21Lingering Will, Kingdom Hearts 2
07:23For many, the battle against the lingering will in Kingdom Hearts 2 really did live up
07:28to its namesake, because boy howdy did this boss just stick around for absolutely bloody
07:34ever and every time that it defeated you, it stole part of your soul.
07:38Now it might sound like hyperbole, but this boss really is the worst thing that Kingdom
07:42Hearts has ever spewed out, and for most gamers represented a point where the devs just went
07:46a little too far.
07:48With its insatiable appetite for ruining your day with meaty attacks, a sickening ability
07:52to heal itself, and for the entire battle to fall apart with just one or two hits being
07:56taken, Lingering Will might as well have been called Suspended Stink, as it was huffing
08:01up the place with its guffs no end.
08:03But you know what's even stinkier?
08:05This ripe bit of cheese that players found to make this boss an utter joke.
08:09By sinking in the time to beat Sephiroth and acquire slash equipping items that reduce
08:13the number of attacks per combo, meaning that you're always hitting with an aerial finisher,
08:17and then buffing that attack to kingdom come, you'll be able to stunlock the beast and rinse
08:21repeat until it's down to just a fraction of its starting health.
08:24This is by no means an elegant fight, and it can go wrong at a moment's notice, but
08:29still it is so impressive that this boss basically provided such a challenge that the community
08:34just said, right, no, enough of you, we're gonna rewrite the game's data and basically
08:38scratch build an entire, entire build just to take down this one boss.
08:43Take that, mate.
08:442.
08:45The General, Kaiser Knuckle
08:47So when it comes to utter cheese lord fighting game final bosses, there are a few entries
08:52that immediately spring to mind.
08:54You've got the likes of Shao Kahn, you've got Jim Pachy, and of course you've got...
08:58Gil, who I swear has done more irreparable damage to my family name than even Jack Hobo
09:03Stabba Gil.
09:04And that guy strangled dogs.
09:06However, all of those actually pale in comparison to the General from the oft-forgotten title
09:11Kaiser Knuckle, although after facing off against this despot, you might see this as
09:15a moment of collective repression as nobody wants to remember the beatdowns that this
09:19guy doled out, because to put it bluntly, this guy cheats a lot.
09:23For a start, he's got all of the hallmarks of a horror show boss, teleportation, multiple
09:27ghost form attacks, instant grabs, and relentlessly punishing combos, and he wastes no time in
09:32putting all of these to good use.
09:34It's a struggle to last even 10 seconds with the General, let alone beat him, but if you
09:38are dedicated to finding victory, you're gonna have to pray that you're not lactose intolerant,
09:42because there is a whole load of cheese to scoff.
09:45Of the few that have actually bested this beast, the common thread seems to be working
09:48towards a stunlock as soon as possible, clipping the General with a jumping kick to low kick
09:53to uppercut, and then repeating ad nauseum.
09:55So I hear you asking, how is this actually cheating?
09:58Well, it's cheating in the sense that this is meant to be a fighting game where you learn
10:01the nuances of all your characters, but here, every single person has to do the same three-hit
10:05combo again and again and again in order to get through this.
10:08You have to cheat to get past the cheater.
10:11And it sucks.
10:121.
10:13Bendak Starkiller – Star Wars Knights of the Old Republic
10:16Now good old Bendak here is what's known as a legend, having earned himself quite the
10:21reputation on Taris for his skills in the duel ring, and by skills I mean shooting people
10:26in the face before they can mouth oh hot damn.
10:29This is a true killer through and through, and has actually retired from competition
10:33because nobody even piqued his interest as a real challenge.
10:36That was until he started hearing rumours of a young whippersnapper that was as good
10:40with a vibroblade as a blaster.
10:41Oh and by the way, that whippersnapper, that's you.
10:44Thus after basically prodding him with a stick and saying, come on, kill me, Starkiller begrudgingly
10:52returns to the ring for one last fight.
10:54Now under normal circumstances this would be the end of you as after all this is right
10:59at the start of the game and he is now shooting you with pinpoint accuracy from the other
11:03side of the ring.
11:04So I know what you're asking yourself, how do I beat this guy?
11:08Have you not got what this video is about, you cheat, you cheat!
11:12After surviving the initial grenade spam offered up by Starkiller, rush directly towards him.
11:17This would obviously seem like a death sentence, but as you get close he'll put away his
11:21pistol and draw his blade, yet instead of engaging him in a fair duel, just drop back
11:26again and shoot him from a distance, falling back every time he gets close.
11:30Now after an admittedly very long time of running away and just firing just like three
11:35or four shots and then running away again, he finally will be defeated in what must
11:40have been the weirdest thing for people to watch.
11:42Imagine that, you've just realised that Starkiller's coming back out of retirement to do one last
11:46battle and you're sitting there, you've paid your, I don't know, your 50 like million
11:50credits in order to get a front row ticket and what you're doing is watching some nobody
11:54just go like, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh, oh,
12:02Oh he's dead!
12:07Starkiller might have been a champion, but smart, he was not.
12:10And there we go my friends, those were seven more video game bosses who forced you to cheat.
12:14I hope that you enjoyed that and again I am very sorry if my delivery was a bit off today
12:18and the skits were quite low, the time constraints plus my illness, just not a great combination.
12:24But I hope that you enjoyed it nonetheless and let me know what you thought about it
12:26down in the comments section below as well as your suggestions for next week's episode
12:30because I'd love to read all of them and I'd love to make some more juicy content when I start feeling 100% again.
12:35But yes, massive thank you to James Dowse as well for the short turnaround of edit.
12:39Big love to you, mate.
12:40But if you want to chat to me further, you can do so over on Twitter,
12:42at RetroJ with a zero, and you can follow James Dowse over here.
12:45James Dowse-y, an extra e because he is an absolutely big legend.
12:50I don't know where I was going with that one. My brain is still foggy.
12:52But before I go, I just want to say one thing.
12:54Hope you treat yourself with love and respect, my friend.
12:56Don't try and cheat yourself out of things in life
12:58because you deserve the time and effort and love putting into situations
13:02that grow you into a better person.
13:04Don't look for the shortcuts in life.
13:05Always try and knuckle down, work hard, because trust me, if you earn those skills,
13:10if you earn your place up the ladder and whichever goal that you're working towards,
13:14you will feel that reward so much more than just cutting your way to the front of the queue.
13:18No one likes that.
13:19Big love to you, though, my friend.
13:20Take care of yourself, and I will see you next week, my friends.
13:24Buh-bye!
13:25Now back to my crypt.
13:27Ah.