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FunTranscript
00:00Hey, hey, hey, hey, keep it ducky, keep it ducky
00:13Hey, hey, hey, hey, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky
00:43Keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it ducky, keep it d
01:13the thing i love with all my heart and would lay down my life for
01:18coco coco
01:23why thank you for telling me the time precious little clock the time kicks should be arriving soon
01:30um
01:35extreme bathroom break
01:46oh
01:53are you okay oh thank goodness well you almost made it to the bathroom uh gunther i had an
02:02accident shh no no no no no this is all my fault i knew i should have moved the toilet in here
02:09no i crashed into your wall oh well that's no big deal
02:15as long as my prize biking cuckoo clock is okay it's my absolute favorite oh i love it so
02:24if anything ever happened to it i just don't know
02:28what i would do
02:33so
02:36um
02:57okay kraken's list you're my only hope viking helmets viking oars half-price viking sneakers
03:04viking cuckoo clock and it's expensive i gotta find a way to pay for this clock
03:10hmm what do i have that's worth a lot of money that i don't mind selling today only the auctioning
03:15of kick the tasky bot one-on-one this here daredevil starts with agility virility and
03:20authenticity he can jump flip parkour walk in his hands and dance like nobody's business he can take
03:26a beer he can take a kicking he can take out the trash auction titles winner to all inclusive
03:31daredevil services for one day sunrise till sunset this daredevil will do whatever you say
03:36let the bidding begin one dollar sign one dollar sign two now two do i hear three three no four no
03:42four dollar sign five the lady in the glasses i hear six and a half seven now seven give me seven
03:47give me seven and a lady in the mustache seven and a half seven and a half here
03:50and sold to the lady in the mustache he's yours all day tomorrow sunrise to sunset
04:02then you gotta pay up and oh kick i can't wait for tomorrow it's gonna be the most
04:08awesome day ever you have to do whatever i say see you tomorrow at sunrise yeah can't wait
04:17it's just one day with jackie you can do this for gunther
04:30let's rock let's rock yeah you didn't have to take the sunrise till sunset thing literally
04:38oh i take everything literally especially the part about you doing everything i say
04:43hey and i want you to start the day with your favorite cereal
04:53a delicious part of a complete cake stowski breakfast well i do love me some stumps
05:04destructo con 87 i didn't know there were any copies left this is the last one look there's
05:11billy stumps making his first appearance ever
05:21what is this homemade cheetah chug
05:28wow you can really taste the sweat come on i got so much more stuff i want to do sure i'm all yours
05:42you built this for me of course i did wait might want to try this on for size
05:51boom a condor's lucky skate wheel how did you get this um found it
06:00awesome my socks got wet and it's really uncomfortable
06:18awesome jackie i had no idea you'd do stuff like this i mean it's the best day ever you think so
06:27then you'll love what i have planned next wow jackie this is amazing a cheetah chug fountain
06:37cardboard cutouts of all my heroes and of my family creepy but hey still very cool
06:46i'm glad you think so because this is gonna be the best wedding ever
06:52wedding you and me kick married oh no jackie i'm not getting married you have to do whatever i say
07:04remember and i say we get married we're gonna spend the rest of our lives together imagine
07:13the rest of our lives the rest of our lives the rest of our lives
07:21rest of our lives rest of our lives are you done imagining yet yes
07:31then let's get this show on the road i've only got till sunset uh well i can't get married just
07:38yet jackie i i forgot my tuxedo got it right here well i forgot the wedding rings i've had them for
07:47years oh well i forgot my lucky eight leaf clover and i can't get married without that
07:57here's a nine leaf one that's even luckier
08:00there you are
08:19now i just gotta stall till sunset i thought you might get cold feet so i planned ahead
08:27run all you want but there is no escape
08:40can't marry jackie must tell gunther about clock
08:45why kick how could you do this to me it's ruined he must have found the broken clock
08:59i'm gonna get the money to buy my friend a new clock even if it means marrying wacky jackie
09:09wacky jackie
09:14my best buddy's wedding and i'm not his best man our friendship is ruined
09:28you can do this go and show your support he's still your best man even if you're not his
09:38be strong old man be strong
09:49i know you come back you can't resist uh this let's do this thing
10:08so
10:20dear little beloved we are gathered here to join the awesome kick butasky to his number one fan
10:28and as we stand here before witnesses and friends we show them that the importance of this great
10:36bond of love that you're not stop the wedding
10:43jackie i have something to tell you yes my darling kick i'm marrying you for the wrong reason
10:50for my money you should be ashamed of yourself but i'm totally cool with it well back to the
10:58wedding no jackie i i broke gunther's favorite viking antique clock and i
11:05auctioned myself off to pay for a replacement i'm sorry gunther i don't care about the clock
11:13kick i thought you found a new best man no way buddy there's nobody better you mean bester i sure
11:23do well we're still getting married you're online till sunset remember
11:35kick sunset is only a minute away
11:41then i gotta buy myself some time gunther know what i'm thinking i'm with you buddy
11:53kick
12:06jackie you take this man to be your husband i do
12:13kick dj jackie to be your wife i i i
12:17i i don't
12:34oh kick it's the wedding i've always dreamed of minus the actual marrying part there's always
12:40next time i still need to replace gunther's clock now fork over the cash but i spent all
12:47the money on the wedding well i guess i'll have to sell off the wedding gifts the the clock but how
12:55to kick and jackie love gunther gunther you have more than one of these
13:00of course they're like potato chips you can't just have one
13:17hey pummel pals i'm brick bristol host of america's number one game show
13:27face plant all you have to do is survive my impossible obstacle course just conquer
13:33the conveyor slayer resist the remixer
13:40ah freeze by the ball and chain hide from the hammerhead
13:50sidestep the seesaw
13:55and finally bypass the loose screws and hit the big red button to win
14:00fifty thousand dollars think you have what it takes or will you
14:10gunther i could totally win on that show but nobody wins on face plant it's impossible
14:17i'm kick butowski of course i'd win but i wish there wasn't that age restriction and remember
14:23we got rid of that age restriction i wish i had a year's supply of donut bacon burgers
14:31gunther that's not a magic tv oh i think you know what we have to do now let's see
14:37if our next load of contestants have what it takes or if they're destined to face plan
14:47a suite for my suite oh ronaldo you're so romantic butowski what are you doing i'm
14:55gonna be the first person to win face plant face plant ha don't you know that show is
15:01impossible to beat unless of course you have science on your side you stick to science and
15:06i'll stick to awesome now where were we instead of a chewy nougat center these chocolates have
15:13atom models tasty and educational ronaldo sometimes you're too much into science can't you be more
15:22awesome
15:28welcome back everyone and now face plant's youngest contestant ever
15:32kick butowski could he be the very first contestant to ever finish my very impossible course
15:39probably not and he's off look at that little guy go
15:44uh he's leaving no stone unturned on our conveyor slayer not bad for a kid who brought his own
15:53helmet looks like he might actually clear the hammerheads no he got nailed
16:05oh okay kick you can either choose to come back and try again or quit and take the booby prize
16:16so which is it back or booby listen you little twerp nobody ever wins on face plant so just
16:25take your booby prize and quit quit isn't in my vocabulary i'm coming back looks like butowski's
16:34coming back to try and push that button so far so good on the killer drillers
16:45oh call kick a cavity because he just got drilled i'm coming back
16:53is having some trouble on this rocky road that's how i roll i'm coming back
17:10kicks on the hammerhead can he make it through no he really hit that nail on the head
17:18i'm coming back
17:24so
17:32i saw that one coming
17:38oh he's sung this tune before and here comes the remix
17:44face plan you sure you want to go back on that show i have to so you want to be
17:54humiliated for the 27th time i'm not being humiliated gunther wow it's kick butowski
18:01can i have your autograph see now who shall i make this out to to kenny from the world's most
18:08awesome loser thanks i told you kick face plant is impossible but ronaldo said i
18:17ronaldo gunther i need to go see the dark one and viola
18:27i've been expecting you you said i could win on face plant
18:31uh-huh i said it could be one if you had science on your side you're chaos butowski
18:38you have no control i've got control oh really
18:47i knew it was a mistake to come here wait i can give you control i'm listening you see
18:54i've got a little problem of my own kendall seems to think i'm too
18:58predictable she wants me to be more awesome what does she even mean by awesome sounds like
19:04you could use a little chaos tell you what butowski you scratch my back and i'll scratch
19:10yours gross what i mean butowski is you help me be more awesome to kendall and i'll give you the
19:17signs to beat face plant to reclaim what's left of your pathetic tattered reputation
19:23deal okay butowski i want you to avoid the tennis balls using all your senses easy peasy
19:34while wearing this blindfold how am i supposed to see what's coming wearing a blindfold
19:39it's impossible it's the thing you don't see coming that gets you for example
19:47hey that's not fair i wasn't even looking that's exactly why you've got to use your
19:51other senses give me the blindfold this better work i can't see anything that's the point
20:00seeing the danger is one thing but only if you hear feel smell the danger coming will you taste
20:08victory told you butowski you gotta use all your senses hey i wasn't ready
20:24two words face plant you're enjoying this aren't you i admit i'm getting a little
20:30satisfaction out of this i can do this with my own two eyes i don't need your help it's
20:36impossible without my help you'll see butowski i mean uh you'll uh feel and hear and use your other
20:43senses hi everyone it's me brick bristol and everyone's favorite loser is back that's right
20:54folks it's our last episode of the season and kick butowski has more lumps than two-year-old
21:00milk but maybe this time he'll survive my course and win or not
21:15he's through the hammerhead this kid's not screwing around
21:20no shortcuts through the seesaw this might be the farthest anyone's been
21:30he's beating my course no no no relax he's just done this part before
21:37and he's through the beam me up and down the tube of terror what do you know he made it to the final
21:45stage one last obstacle and he'll win piece of cake not if i can help it
21:56slightly larger piece of cake but cake nonetheless and now to really seal the deal
22:06i can't see this is impossible ain't that a shame maybe now he'll come to his senses and quit
22:13senses what did ronaldo say use all your senses not just your eyes
22:21sounds like hammer smells like
22:24must use all senses
22:55so
23:05have a nice trip see you next fail
23:10no i mean it looks like he's gonna make it to the button
23:16oh no you don't give me that button i won fair and square don't you get it this is my show and
23:24my button no one wins face plant people want to see pain failure humiliation so give these
23:30losers what they want i mean no i'm doing it for you guys oh i'll give them what they want
23:37give me that button
23:57should have used all your senses
24:00nice one i beat face plant thanks to you ronaldo now to return the favor i'll show you how to be
24:08more exciting now do not use your senses it's what you don't see coming that makes it awesome
24:14on your mark get set hey wait i don't think i want
24:20don't forget to hook that
24:22sign
24:39i'm sorry candle i wish i could have been more awesome
24:43more awesome what could possibly have been more awesome you rode an ironing board off a cliff
24:48you bounced over every rooftop in town and now we get to ride in an ambulance
24:52it's enough awesome to last a lifetime
24:59well that makes us just about even
25:04and now your prize for beating face plant a check for fifty thousand dollars
25:11kick patowski i'm collecting for ronaldo's hospital bill this should cover it biscuits
25:41so
25:54you