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Short filmTranscript
00:00On a scale from one to ten, how screwed am I?
00:03A million.
00:04You don't think I'd understand a ten as bad?
00:08I'm suspended.
00:08I'm technically not even a detective anymore.
00:11They said I was consistently reckless, inappropriate, and glib.
00:14Why can't you just hide me on a desk in here or something?
00:16I wouldn't even be doing any real work.
00:18I'd just be checking the websites I like.
00:22You want your job back.
00:23I've got something that the sheriff wants you to drive to Miami.
00:26The arm? That's all they found?
00:28Nah, man, the head's in the passenger seat.
00:30If you're too grouchy to answer the question,
00:31just say I'm too grouchy to answer the question.
00:33You don't have to hit me with the head in the passenger seat.
00:36The widow, Ann Stripling, reported her husband missing.
00:39She needs the arm to bury him.
00:41When did you learn Nick was missing?
00:42I was in Paris.
00:43It was a birthday present from him.
00:45So were these.
00:46Fancy.
00:46They were like ten grand.
00:48Why are we whispering?
00:49I don't know.
00:50What if this wasn't an accident?
00:52I'm telling you, she was trying very hard to cry.
00:55What are you doing?
00:55You're not a cop.
00:56Leave it alone.
00:59I can't get involved in this.
01:00You're the one that got me involved.
01:01You want to stop being polite and start getting real?
01:03Is that the intro to The Real World?
01:04In my defense, I thought you were too young to know that.
01:07Inspector Yancey, I have a few questions.
01:09What time is it?
01:10Just past bathrobe time, so you're still good.
01:12Okay.
01:13I want a lot of immunity.
01:15How about just a normal amount of immunity?
01:16No, it's got to be a lot, a lot.
01:18They did a bad, bad thing.
01:20I have an ungod authority that Eve is in the Bahamas to grieve.
01:24I really need to find her.
01:25Go talk to the Dragon Queen.
01:29None of this is going to go the way you want it to.
01:32They did a bad, bad thing.
01:33All right, I don't want that.
01:35You ever pray with all your heart?
01:36So who's this guy?
01:37He's a little older, talks way too much.
01:39This guy's as dirty as a sock on the highway.
01:42That's not a real expression.
01:43None of them are real expressions until someone says them, okay?
01:45So I'm a groundbreaker.
01:47And his ex-girlfriend is a criminal.
01:49I like her for you.
01:50They did a bad, bad thing.
01:51My gut is telling me that there's somebody who's keeping an eye on me
01:54because of what I know, but I really don't know what I know.
01:58You had a concussion.
02:00I'm fine.
02:01This time you didn't drive here.
02:02I don't think I did.
02:06I have a plan.
02:06No, you don't.
02:07I'm gonna make a plan the second you leave.
02:11Your magic ain't working.
02:12All kinds of bad people getting in the water now.
02:18What did you do?
02:19I'm in a bit of a jam here.
02:20Dude, you're a murder suspect.
02:22Maybe it's even a pickle.
02:23On a scale from one to ten, how screwed am I?
02:26A million.
02:27You couldn't just say ten?
02:28You don't think I'd understand that ten is bad?
02:30They did a bad, bad thing.
02:32Your place is a rat trap.
02:33Why didn't you get a cat?
02:34I have one right here.
02:35You have to buy a tiger.
02:36You can't get tigers in Florida, idiot.
02:38There was a documentary about it, dumbass.