PREGNANCY TUTORIALS (ONLY FOR WOMEN)
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00:00I'm Dr. Laura Shaheen. Welcome to my YouTube channel. Today, we're going to talk about tips
00:03for sex for baby making. There's so many misconceptions about when to have intercourse,
00:10how to have intercourse, how often. And today I'm going to clarify those misconceptions and
00:15help you make a baby when you're ready. I'm Dr. Laura Shaheen. I'm a reproductive
00:23endocrinologist who's been helping people build their families for over 15 years.
00:27I spent over a decade answering questions about optimizing your natural fertility,
00:33when to have intercourse, how to have intercourse, how often to have intercourse.
00:36And I am going to help you answer those questions today. So let's get started.
00:40Number one, when to have sex. You want to have intercourse during the fertile window,
00:44which is in the middle of your menstrual cycle around the time of ovulation. Ovulation is when
00:50the egg is released from the ovary. It goes into the fallopian tube and you want sperm
00:54there to meet it. If you are ready to make a baby, the fertile window is about six days
01:00leading up to the time of ovulation. And that is when you want to have intercourse.
01:04The menstrual cycle, if it's 28 days long, which most people do not have a perfect,
01:11completely regular and predictable menstrual cycle every 28 days, but that's an easy way to
01:15talk about it. Cycle day one is the first day of bleeding in a menstrual cycle. Cycle day 28
01:21is the day before your next onset of bleeding, which is your next cycle day one. So if you have
01:27a 28 day cycle, you're most likely ovulating or releasing that egg around cycle day 14.
01:34If you have a regular 30 day menstrual cycle, maybe it's around day 15 or 16. If you have
01:39a regular 25 day cycle, maybe it's a little earlier around cycle day 10 or 11. So one of
01:45the best things that you can do is start charting your menstrual cycles and tracking when you get
01:50your period and looking for signs of ovulation. Signs of ovulation can be increased cervical
01:57mucus. So as that egg is maturing, the ovaries are making more estrogen, higher levels of estrogen
02:04increase the production of cervical mucus. When people talk about that egg white or kind of thin
02:11stringy cervical mucus, it's because it's seeing estrogen and the most estrogen and the most
02:18slippery kind of egg white consistency cervical mucus happens within the fertile window.
02:25So if you think you're ovulating around day 14, then you want to start having intercourse
02:31about six days earlier. So do the math maybe around day nine or 10 and do it another time
02:38before day 14. There's so many misconceptions about timing intercourse. Other ways to know
02:45when you're ovulating, you can do ovulation predictor kits. They're not always perfect
02:50and sometimes they're really frustrating, but what you're looking for is when the estrogen level gets
02:55really high, like when the egg is mature and about to release, then that estrogen from your ovary
03:00talks to your pituitary gland and it releases something called luteinizing hormone or LH.
03:07There's a peak of LH that LH goes back and tells that mature follicle in the ovary,
03:14release that egg. So when you're doing ovulation predictor kits, you want to start it earlier than
03:19when you expect to see it be positive. So start checking and peeing on a stick about once a day
03:25around cycle day nine or 10 and do it every day. You expect it to be negative. And then
03:29when it's positive, when you see that peak, that positive ovulation predictor kit,
03:35you're actually releasing the egg about 24 to 48 hours after that first positive ovulation
03:42predictor kit. So when you see that peak, that's a great time to have intercourse. And then maybe
03:48the next day to timing of intercourse, you're trying to figure out when you're ovulating and
03:53you want to have intercourse during that time. Something that's reassuring. And when you're
03:56worried about timing is understanding a little bit more about physiology after the egg is released
04:02and it's in the fallopian tube and waiting for the sperm, it is viable and able to be fertilized for
04:07about 12 to 24 hours. Sperm after ejaculation, it can be in the reproductive tract and waiting to
04:14find an egg for about two to up to five days. And so knowing that there is some overlap in intercourse
04:23and when the egg and sperm can meet, that can hopefully decrease some of your worry about trying
04:28to find this perfect magic moment. You just want to try to have intercourse a few times around
04:34ovulation. Number two, frequency of sex. Oh my gosh. There's so many misconceptions about this.
04:41There's some studies that say that if you have intercourse every single day, then you're going to
04:45have a higher chance of conceiving. There's others that say if you have intercourse every other day,
04:50that might be better. And so it can be really confusing if you're the patient. Frequent
04:56intercourse in the window of ovulation will improve the chances of sperm and egg meeting,
05:03but it's a balance. It can be very stressful, physically demanding. Intimacy can really be
05:08impacted between a couple if it's like very timed and calculated and feeling like you have to have
05:14intercourse like on the spot every single day. So just be mindful of that. And honestly, if you
05:20have intercourse two or three times in that fertile window in the middle of your cycle,
05:25kind of leading up to ovulation and around the time of ovulation, that is going to be the best
05:31way to time it. So try to balance the stress of making it overly clinical to thinking about the
05:40physiology and then balancing your relationship with your partner and just like how intimacy can
05:47really be impacted by this sort of strict timing. So I hope that that helps. A common misconception
05:54is that frequent intercourse will decrease sperm counts and decrease the chances of conceiving.
06:00And for most people creating sperm, this is actually not true. If you look at daily sperm
06:07counts in certain studies, they remain pretty consistent. There are some times where people
06:12have very low sperm counts and daily or frequent intercourse might decrease the amount of sperm
06:18that is seen at the time of ovulation. But for most people, this is a true misconception and
06:24frequency does not decrease the amount of sperm that's there. So when you're having intercourse,
06:28what about position? Is there a position for sex that makes it better for baby making? Short answer
06:35is no. Any position where there is ejaculation and getting sperm into the vagina, the sperm is
06:41in the cervical canal within seconds. It does not matter what position you have intercourse.
06:46There is no evidence that changing position increases your chances of conceiving. There's
06:51also no evidence that position of intercourse changes the sex of the embryo or whether you
06:57have a boy or a girl. So position does not matter. What about lubricants with sex? Are they good? Are
07:03they bad? What about for baby making? Short answer is some lubricants are okay and others are actually
07:08harmful for the function of sperm. So in studies, some store-bought water-based lubricants like
07:14KY or Astroglide have been shown to decrease the function and mobility of the sperm. Other things
07:20that have been tested, they've been shown to slow down sperm function and motility are saliva
07:26and olive oil. Other things that you can find like canola oil or mineral oil, these have been
07:33studied and they actually do not decrease the motility and function of the sperm. Some hydroxyethyl
07:39cellulose-based lubricants like Pre-Seed are sold in the drugstore and they actually have been shown
07:44in studies to not slow down sperm. Be careful of ingredients in some of these store-bought lubricants
07:50because some of them have phthalates and we know that phthalates can impact our reproductive health.
07:54Please see my blog post on phthalates and my video on phthalates to learn a little bit more
07:58about how they impact not only sperm production but also our egg health and reproductive health.
08:04What about sex and orgasm? Is it good? Is it bad? Is it helpful? Short answer is it's not harmful.
08:11Theoretically, female orgasms will help pull sperm from the cervical canal into the uterus and into
08:17the fallopian tubes where the eggs are waiting. So in theory, it might be helpful. This has not
08:22been proven in scientific studies but certainly orgasms are not harmful for baby making. What
08:29about position after intercourse? Hips in the air, standing on your head, feet up. Does that
08:35improve your chances of making a baby? Short answer, no. Positions after intercourse do not
08:40change the chances of sperm getting to the egg. The sperm is within the cervical canal within
08:45seconds after ejaculation and changing positions after intercourse does not improve your chances
08:51of making a baby. The stuff that comes out after intercourse is a mix of ejaculate and then vaginal
08:56secretions and of course there's going to be some sperm in it but that sperm is where it needs to
09:01be so quickly that positions after intercourse do not change your chances of getting pregnant. I
09:05hope this was helpful. There's so many misconceptions when it comes to timing intercourse and frequency
09:11and lubrications and positions. I hope this clarified a few things. If it was helpful,
09:18please like this video, comment below with other things that you've heard. I'd love to bust myths
09:24for you and really clarify all of your questions and please subscribe so you get notifications for
09:30my next video when it's available. Thank you so much for being here. More information on Instagram,
09:37on my blog, at my website and I'm going to link here below a wonderful document from
09:44Fertility and Sterility. It's American Society of Reproductive Medicine
09:49document on optimizing your natural fertility where a lot of the information from this
09:53video came from so you can see the studies and read it for yourself. Thank you for being here
09:58and stick around for more educational videos.