How Not to be RUDE!

Name: How Not to be RUDE!
Uploaded: 2024-07-29T18:52:01+00:00
Duration: 36 min 55 s
Channel: Stefan Molyneux

00:00Good morning everybody, Stephen Molyneux from Freedomain, hope you're doing well, great

00:04questions and comments at freedomain.locals.com, I hope you will check out the community, there

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00:42donate at freedomain.com slash donate, you get that. All right, let's get into it.

00:47Bit of a short answer on the last one that didn't quite seem to answer the question fully,

00:51this is regarding UPP. My answer would be something like this, if UPP is true, it doesn't

00:56need more than one proof to establish that fact, it just needs one correct proof. Similarly,

01:04Jesus doesn't need four Gospels, one is enough. The reason why there are four of them is because

01:08they were written with different audiences in mind, Matthew for the Jews, Mark for the

01:12Gentiles, John for the Greeks, Luke for those wanting a longer version. Similarly, I suppose

01:17there could be different versions of UPP for people who find the existing proof to

01:22be somewhat inaccessible or difficult to comprehend, but I suppose those people could also try

01:26listening to some of the debates you've had about it, perhaps they will find those more

01:29convincing. While it's certainly not necessary to have more than one proof for UPP to establish

01:37its truth value, I suppose it could, in fact, help convince some people who are still stuck

01:41so deeply in unreality that they find the existing proof difficult to process. Some

01:46mathematical theorems also have several different proofs for them, even though one would completely

01:50suffice. I don't think it's impossible that someone might find a different proof for UPP

01:55that's more convincing or accessible to people who are having trouble wrapping their minds

01:58around the original one, but that person would likely not be stiff. Of course, finding such

02:02a proof wouldn't make UPP more true, but it might help convince more people. Yes, that's

02:07true. So how do you prevent an idea from spreading? You demonize, well, first of all,

02:15you ignore the person, right? You ignore the person and hope that they go away. If the

02:20person doesn't go away and is consistent and persistent and starts to gain some traction,

02:25you demonize the person so that nobody wants to defend that person, therefore those ideas

02:31cannot spread. You make it socially unacceptable to defend that person. The spread of the theory

02:41of evolution is interesting. Darwin himself was not out there thundering from the pulpit

02:45about his theory of evolution by natural selection. There was a guy, I can't remember his name,

02:51he was basically referred to as Darwin's bulldog, and he was the guy who went out and argued

02:56and debated and was ferocious and was very pugnacious and did great stuff to help spread

03:03that theory. So for me, what's happened is nobody with any prominence and nobody with

03:17any respectability and nobody with any gravitas, so to speak, or credentials or who does shows

03:26with their shirts on, could be any number of things, but nobody who's that refined and

03:32has the right letters after their name is allowed to talk about me in anything other

03:40than the most negative and contemptuous terms. That's the deal, right? They give you all

03:43these goodies, and then there's a price, and the internet has allowed you to have prominence

03:50without being bought, owned, and paid for with goodies, right? So if you were in academia,

03:57and I was without a doubt the most popular philosopher for a large number of years across

04:03the world, you know, a billion views and downloads is nothing to sneeze at. I've been trained

04:08academically in philosophy. I have a graduate degree. My thesis was on the history of philosophy

04:14with Kant, Hegel, Locke, and all of these great people that I analyzed, and I got an

04:22A, and so, yeah, I mean, I have the credentials and so on. But people, and I propose a sort

04:32of very radical and valid moral theory, right? So that would be something that people would

04:40want to talk about, but they couldn't talk about it, right? It's not an accident, right?

04:46The things that just don't happen that way, that the most popular philosopher in the world

04:51who has a radical new theory proving secular ethics, that's something that philosophers

04:59would get involved in and talk about, right? And it's funny because some of the professional

05:07academic philosophers, they say, well, but he does not have a PhD from Harvard. It's

05:16very funny to me. Oh, these vague parasites, right? And the reason why that's funny for

05:22me is that, did Socrates have a PhD from Harvard? At least 90% of the people who were

05:35taught in an introductory to the history of philosophy series did not have what we would

05:40call modern academic credentials. So it's funny that they base all of the history of

05:45philosophy on people who don't have academic credentials in philosophy. I mean, Nietzsche

05:52was philology and all of that. I mean, there are some who do, Bertrand Russell was well

05:56educated and all of that, but to me, it's just kind of funny that the people who teach

06:04philosophy teach about philosophers who did not have the formal accreditation they demand

06:10of anyone they would talk about in the present. But anyway, so the people can't be out there

06:20defending my thesis about UPB, right? They can't do that because they'll lose all of

06:27the social goodies and little petty rewards and so on. If UPB is correct, it's the biggest

06:36advance in philosophy in the history of philosophy, right? I mean, no question, right? Because

06:40it is a rational proof of secular ethics, no gods, no governments and so on. It is the

06:45final proof. It is the proof of virtue, the proof, and that's never existed before in

06:51philosophy in a way that you can't just discount in one way or another. So it solves the problem

06:57which we're kind of facing in the modern world, which is if morals come from God, you can

07:06sidestep, right? You can sidestep morality by not believing in God. UPB takes that away.

07:13It says that the only way you can disbelieve in UPB is to abandon logic, reason, reality,

07:18and debating in any way, shape, or form. Arguments, debates in any way, shape, or form. So to isolate

07:26and demonize me is the way to make sure that my theory doesn't spread. There's no particular way

07:32around that. I mean, there aren't going to be academics who are going to say, gee, this

07:38incredible philosopher, in terms of like incredibly popular, not incredible, but this

07:43guy is having a lot of influence. We need to deal with his theories because he's getting

07:51philosophy out to the masses, bypassing academia, bypassing the media, speaking directly to people.

07:56So we need to deal with him. If I'm egregiously wrong, then you need to put me in my place,

08:01right? That would make sense, right? And so the fact that academic philosophers aren't saying,

08:07well, we need to debate you because you're just amateur and completely wrong and so on.

08:14They don't care about the morals of society. So let's say that I was some terrible guy who was

08:19teaching evil to people. Then philosophers in the academic sense, who obviously claim to care about

08:28truth and virtue in society, would have to step in to debate me so that I could stop spreading

08:34this, quote, malign influence and so on. But they just ignore it. That's the price. You can't

08:39engage, which means they don't particularly care about morals and virtue. If I'm right, then they

08:44need to get behind me. If I'm wrong, then they need to discredit me through debate. But that's

08:52not happening. So they don't particularly care. Somebody says, so I wonder if depression is a

08:57kind of moral exhaustion, soul fatigue. That's a very interesting thought. I'm obviously no

09:03clinician, don't know smack about diagnosing anyone about anything, but my amateur views on

09:10depression. Depression happens most commonly from what I've seen when people are surrounded

09:21by those they cannot connect with. They've tried every strategy to try and connect with,

09:27to gain empathy, to give empathy, to have a connection, to have a relationship. They've

09:32tried everything they can. They get blocked at every route. And it's the exhaustion that sets in

09:38when you can't connect with people, neither can you get away from them. You can't connect with

09:42them, neither can you get away with them. So you're stuck in this limbo, this dead zone, this

09:47null zone of no connection and no escape. And there is an isolation that is built around you

09:56by defensive people, right? And we'll get to that with a couple of these questions.

10:00So defensive people are just about managing their emotions by manipulating you. And so you

10:06can't connect with them because all they're doing is trying to figure out how to manage

10:08their own emotions. And so when you try to connect with people, they keep dodging you,

10:16evading you, gaslighting you, manipulating you, minimizing you, lying to you, and so on.

10:21Then it gets really frustrating. You want to connect, but it's just always a maze with no

10:25exit, right? You go in trying to get to the person. You just hear laughter around the corner.

10:29There's a bit of moldy cheese, couple of dead rats, and then you're trapped again. And then

10:33can you find your way back out of the maze? Like when you engage with defensive people,

10:36you are entering a maze of manipulation. And by defensive people, what I'm referring to

10:42is people who are managing their own self contempt by manipulating you. They're trying

10:48to avoid themselves by avoiding any sort of direct questions or connection with you.

10:53So when you get lost in that maze, you can't find the person. You can't find your way back out.

11:00What do you do? I mean, you just sit. You just sit and stare. There's no point going on. You

11:06can never catch the person and you can't go back. Defenses lead you into this maze and say,

11:12oh, I'm just around the corner. Oh, just down here. Here's a bit of laughter. Oh, we're having

11:15a great cookout down here. Here's some food here. Some water here. You can go to the washroom here.

11:19Here's some rest. And just lead you deeper and deeper into the maze. And the further you go in

11:24hot pursuit of defensive people, people who avoid themselves by manipulating you, the further you go

11:29into that maze, the less chance you have of getting out. So it's very dangerous, very dangerous

11:38to interact with manipulative people. They will pull you out of yourself and leave you rotting

11:43in the corner of an endless maze. No good. No good. I mean, there are ways out, but there's a

11:50feeling that there isn't. All right. Hey, Steph, can you share some insights about the subject of

11:56judgment? For example, in doing deep shadow work, we are told to take a clear look at our judgments

12:01and identify them and their root causes so we can confront repressed fears, emotions, and desires,

12:06and eventually integrate and accept those aspects of ourselves. I had a thought that judgment

12:10evolved to help us protect ourselves and our loved ones. So the question is how to discern

12:16between it serving us or being a destructive force or limitation in our lives.

12:19It's a great question. It's a great question. Deep shadow work is a sort of Jungian term that you have to

12:27accept your own capacity for evil and manipulation and corruption and all of that in order to be

12:34virtuous. And I mean, I think there's no truth in that. We're all human. The last thing we want to

12:44do is portray ourselves as angels and thus cast thunderbolts down on devils. And you've heard me a

12:50million times in call-in shows saying I'm certainly not above this. I do this myself. I'm right there

12:54in the trenches with you. I'm not casting this judgment from any high place. We are all engaged

12:59in this battle of virtue against what seems like an inexhaustible tsunami of series of tsunamis of

13:05corruption. So I think that's important to accept your own capacity for immorality. If you think

13:12you're an angel, you're not actually that good because you've got nothing to fight against, right?

13:17You've got nothing to fight against. And also if you think you're an angel,

13:24then you can't be dangerous, right? We do have to have a capacity for destructive strength,

13:31right? And I don't mean that in terms of any physical violence or anything like that,

13:34but in terms of like standing your ground and pushing back against corrupt people,

13:38it takes some guts, it takes some strength, it takes some anger, it takes some hostility,

13:43it takes some aggression. Again, I'm talking all verbal and the thrust and parry of debates,

13:48nothing physical or violent, but it does take a certain amount of bloody-mindedness to stand

13:54your ground in a corrupt world. So yes, you need to be in touch with that side of yourself.

14:00Is it serving us or being a destructive force or limitation in our lives? So

14:03you manipulate others when you reframe their intentions to your own convenience.

14:14And I'll get to that. There's an example of this coming up, so we'll get to that.

14:20So the best way you know if your judgments are valid is are they universal, are they rational,

14:25are they empirical, right? So when you judge people, are you judging their actions, not their

14:29intentions, because intentions are just a form of mysticism. Intentions is mind reading, intentions

14:35is astrology, it is tarot card reading, it's reading tea leaves. Reading intentions is a form

14:43of mysticism because it's not empirical. You can just make up anything that you want and it leads

14:46you back into that maze, which is just horrible. So if you apply a judgment to someone, are you

14:53willing to subject yourself to that judgment? Are you willing to subject yourself to a judgment

14:59before you judge others, right? Because a judgment is there to say, this is bad, this is good, this

15:05is evil, this is moral, this is dysfunctional, this is functional. So if you have a judgment,

15:10are you willing to subject yourself to that judgment first and foremost? And are you willing

15:16sometimes to work for months or years to improve yourself relative to your judgments before you

15:21start inflicting them on others? If your first impulse is to inflict judgments on others rather

15:26than apply them rationally to yourself, you're in a bad place, that's a hypocritical place. So you

15:31apply judgment to yourself, I spent 20 years working on my rationality before I became any

15:36kind of public figure. So you apply that judgment to yourself, you apply that judgment to those

15:41around you and particularly those who have power over you, like your parents and so on. You apply

15:46that judgment to your family, you apply that judgment to your friends, you apply that judgment

15:49to your girlfriend or boyfriend or whoever, right? And once you've got your own particular corner of

15:54the world clear and subjected to that judgment, then you can start tentatively putting it out

16:00into the world with a due knowledge that it's difficult to do and it takes a long time.

16:05So physician heal thyself, right? If you've got a judgment that you think is a positive value to

16:09people, you have to first apply it relentlessly to yourself and everyone in your immediate life

16:14and then you can start to spread it outwards. If your first goal is to just judge others,

16:18you're avoiding yourself. All right. Hi, Steph. It occurs to me that until very recently, women

16:25were married early and then constantly pregnant, suffering or recovering from miscarriage or

16:28recovering from birth and breastfeeding. And as I've mentioned recently in shows, and then they

16:34graduate straight to taking care of grandchildren. So you got 20 year fertility window. So by the

16:41time your oldest kids are 20, they probably, evolutionarily speaking, they would have had

16:46children of your own. So your whole, your whole business is dealing with babies and toddlers and

16:52pregnancy and so on. Right. So it says, I wonder if this is why previously women were considered

16:56very delicate, fainting at the drop of a hat and needing to be looked after. Um, I don't have that

17:02experience. I know that there's this sort of Freudian thing about these women with their

17:05fainting spells and the sort of cure nightly hysteria and so on. I'm just referring to a

17:11character in a movie, not the person herself, but, uh, no women, women were hysterical because

17:19they were raped as children. Right. I mean, that's the general, I did a whole speech in New York

17:22about this, uh, that Freud betrayed children by, uh, his adult, his adult patients who had all

17:29these symptoms of, of hysteria and neurasthenia and neurosis and so on. Uh, he found out almost

17:34universally in questioning them that they had been raped as children, usually by parents.

17:40And so what he did was he began to talk about this and then he was threatened, uh, all over the place

17:47because, you know, obvious reasons. And so what he did was he said, okay, well, uh, this guy,

17:55this woman says that her father raped her as a child. Um, if I talk about that, I've got a whole

18:02bunch of kids. I like dealing cocaine and I need an income. So, oh, I got it. Um, yeah, they just

18:13made it up. Yeah. It's, it's a fantasy, right? This is where you come up with the edible complex

18:16and the electric complex and so on. And so, yeah, I mean, people told Freud the truth and Freud then

18:23said, no, they're lying. It's a fantasy and, and wish fulfillment. And, and so the whole founding

18:28of this kind of stuff was based upon the corrupted betrayal of, uh, raped children. No, absolutely

18:34horrifying and appalling. So, uh, I mean, I've known some sort of delicate and hysterical

18:38women. Uh, my mother was, was quite hysterical, but I also suspect that she did not have a very

18:43good childhood that way, to put it mildly. So, um, but I also had my, my aunts, right? Uh, I was,

18:50uh, uh, very close to my aunts when I was a baby and toddler, certainly one of them.

18:54And, uh, they were very strong, healthy, practical, robust women and so on. Right. So anyway,

18:59uh, what does she say here? I wonder if this, uh, fainting at the drop of a hat,

19:03needing to be looked after. Is it possible there wasn't a giant conspiracy by men to keep women

19:08down, but that it was simply true. I've been pregnant or recovering nearly constantly for

19:12the last five years. It's very different to being on birth control. That's true.

19:15Birth control is a kind of mind control. I've really started appreciating things I never cared

19:20about before, such as having heavy things carried for me or being given a seat on public transport.

19:24So many of the women complaining about the patriarchy have never been pregnant and they

19:27wonder if they just don't realize how different it is and how we as a society have never experienced

19:32this before. Uh, well, of course we have, right? So when you tell women to go be independent and

19:38then you force employers to marry them and artificially prop up their wages and, and so on.

19:43And then, um, then yeah, they, they don't feel that they need men because men are forced to

19:49serve them, right? Like if, um, if a cruel man has slaves, he doesn't appreciate labor saving devices.

20:00So when men are forced to subsidize women, women don't, don't feel they need men. Sure. I,

20:07I understand that. Uh, so you tell women, go get educated. You don't need a man. You,

20:15you subsidize and give them all kinds of money and resources. And, um,

20:23they don't feel the need to have kids then. Right. And certainly for women, uh, and I understand this,

20:28uh, being, being flirted with and being taken out to dinner and flown here and there,

20:34and, uh, it's sexy and it's exciting and, and thrilling and, and all of that.

20:38It's a, it's a kind of dopamine drug. Now that dopamine drug is supposed to lead to

20:41pair bonding and children, but women just peel off at that last bit and stay with the flirting

20:47and the dating and the likes and the chatting until they just burn out completely and then

20:52lose the ability to pair bond and blame men. So, uh, but yes, if you don't have a birth rate,

20:57that's reasonable, then women can complain about men because the value of men is invisible to

21:03women. If women, if men are forced to subsidize women, and if women don't get pregnant,

21:08then the value of men, and you see this all over the place, what do we need men for? Nothing.

21:11Blah, blah, blah. While you walk on the roads and live in the houses and drive the cars and all

21:16designed and built largely by men. Uh, this other woman replied, good question. I have four children.

21:21So I've been pregnant, breastfeeding, recovering, and holding babies for almost 10 years now.

21:25I don't think children, I don't think childless women realize how debilitating it can be.

21:29I always appreciate when a man helps me with my stroller or carry something to my car.

21:33Yeah. I mean, absolutely. Always, always, always help a pregnant woman. If there's not another guy

21:37around. All right. Uh, let's see here. Let's do one more. I became interested in the topic

21:46of spanking children after listening to Steph for a while. So I decided to look around and find out

21:50what people think about it. In scouring forums and discussion boards, I was honestly taken aback by

21:55the sheer numbers of people that believe hitting their kids is normal and healthy when there's

21:59overwhelming evidence that says otherwise. I thought by now societies, especially in the

22:03West would have awakened to this. Even among those who don't spank, they still use their

22:08positions to threaten and withhold children's property as a form of punishment. I guess

22:11reasoning with their children is off the table. Yes. Uh, that is, uh, that is true. Uh, that is

22:17sad. That is tragic. It takes a while. It takes a while, but you know, honestly, the internet has

22:23really accelerated these things. So for instance, the voluntary family, when I first started the

22:29show, right, that you don't have to spend time with relentlessly toxic and abusive parents

22:33was so horrifying that it was, you know, I was called a cult leader for even suggesting this

22:39as a vague possibility. And, uh, it's, uh, it's become no contact of zone. It's become quite

22:45normalized, uh, in, in really only 18 years. Uh, that's remarkably fast for a social change of that

22:52kind. All right. Uh, somebody said, oh yeah. So I answered someone's question about talking

22:59politics with people. And he replied, it seems to me that you have basically just avoided answering

23:04the question by making reference to the larger political climate and the fact that the pervasive

23:08power of the state makes it very difficult for people to have any sort of rational discussion

23:11about politics. I recall that in the past you have advocated for simply not having any people

23:16in your life that supported the against me argument, i.e. people who are willing to involve

23:20government in order to settle any arguments or disputes. It seems to me that such people would

23:25be able to recognize the fact that government equal violence and that all politics is simply

23:29a struggle for power, i.e. gap, grabbing the gun in the room as you previously put it.

23:33And would consequently also be uninterested in discussing it. If you have such people in your

23:38life, why was that not the answer? So that's kind of bitchy, right? And that's, uh, that's kind of

23:44bitchy. I just sort of want to want to point it out. It's, it's a little unpleasant to be on the

23:49receiving end of something like that. So, uh, you know, I, I take time out of my day. I put effort

23:55into answering your questions. Uh, I don't charge anything and all of that. So a little thank you

24:00for taking the time to answer my question. Cause it's not just, you know, I got to read the question.

24:04I got to think about it. Sometimes I need to take notes. I got to record it. I got to process it. I

24:09got to upload it. I got to share it. Like it's a long, it's a large amount of effort to answer your

24:15questions. So a little appreciation, you know, kind of goes a long way. I'm not saying you've

24:22got to love the answer. I'm not saying you've got to agree with the answer. I could be totally wrong.

24:26But in general, uh, if people are putting a lot of effort for free on, uh, to you on,

24:30on your behalf and answering a question, uh, then it might be, it might be reasonable to say,

24:37Hey, thanks for the question. Here's what I felt was deficient or missing. If you could,

24:40you know, solve that, I'd appreciate it. I mean, it's just a, it's a nice way to interact with

24:44people just as a whole. So you might want to, you might want to look into that a little bit.

24:49Um, you've basically just avoided answering the question. So, um, avoidance is mind reading,

24:56right? So it's a bit of a sinister accusation, right? Uh, that I'm gaslighting, right? That I,

25:01I know the answer to the question I'm avoiding it because I'm a hypocrite, right? Because according

25:06to this guy, well, I mean, gee, why would you even have people in your life? Uh, blah, blah,

25:10blah, blah, blah, blah. It's like, but the question was about people in your life, right?

25:14I don't have people in my life who advocate the use of violence against me. Of course not.

25:18So, um, this is a bad faith response. Uh, just, just to be clear, right. It's a very bad faith

25:23response. So, uh, of course, I'm not going to answer something that I've said a million times

25:28before, because I assume this is what I assume. I assume that as a listener for a long time,

25:34and you're a donor and all of that, right. And, you know, I say this with affection,

25:37I want you to have a more positive experience interacting with the world rather than have

25:40these weird, sinister, bad faith accusations against people who've done something nice to

25:44you for free. So, um, I assume that you are somewhat familiar with my work. So you're

25:54asking a question that I haven't answered a million times before. So this is why I try to

25:58come up with new answers to existing questions. Otherwise I would just refer you to one of my

26:04existing shows. Right. So as it turns out, you, um, you already have my answer for discussing

26:11politics with people. You already have my answer, the against me answer. So then why would you ask

26:16me the question? Why would you ask me the question if you already know my answer? Right. And so I'm

26:22going to, I assume that, you know, in general, my framework for discussing these things I've

26:25talked about it about a zillion times over the years. So, um, why, why would you ask me the

26:33question if you already know my answer? Right. And then accuse me of being a bad faith answer.

26:39Right. So you've done this mind reading thing where you're basically like, uh, if you have

26:45such people in your life, why was that not the answer? Right. So this is just, it's, it's nasty,

26:49right? Like what you're doing is, is kind of nasty. Right. Which is not to say it's totally a valid

26:53question. You can totally say to me, Steph, I'm curious, do you have people in your life

26:57who, um, uh, who advocate for the use of violence against you directly? Right. That's a perfectly

27:02fine question, right? There's no problem answering that, but this kind of trap, you ask a question,

27:07you already know the answer to you. Then accuse me of avoiding answering the question.

27:11And then you imply that, uh, I'm being a hypocrite because I must have people in my life

27:16who do this. Um, and logically it doesn't follow. Right.

27:22So willing to involve the government in order to settle any arguments or disputes,

27:27uh, no, well settled maybe. Right. So, um, if people advocate for the use of violence against

27:33you, then you can't debate with them, but that doesn't mean that everyone who's pro statist

27:38never debates with anyone, right. They pretend to debate. You just have to identify the gun in

27:42the room. So, um, such people would be able to recognize the fact that the government equals

27:49violence. Uh, no, no, the people do not believe that the government equals violence, or if they

27:54finally do admit it, they say it's the least violence possible, right? This is the, um,

27:59Hobbesian state of nature argument, or, um, Churchill talking, uh, democracy is the worst

28:04system of government that has tried except for all the others. Right. So people will not admit

28:08that the government is, is coercive. And then when you prove that to them, they'll say, okay,

28:13it is, but the alternative is much more coercive. Right. So, um, I, I, maybe you've never debated

28:19this stuff with anyone in which case, I don't know why you're asking the question, but this

28:21is a very, very sort of common thing. Right. So, yeah, I, um, I, I would, I would recommend

28:30not mind reading. I would recommend a little bit of an attitude of gratitude that if someone

28:35takes, um, an hour or two to answer your question, that you show some appreciation for that

28:41just for the time doesn't mean you have to agree. Uh, and, uh, don't be kind of a sinister, uh,

28:47in impugning bad motives when you're the one with bad motives, right? Because you're,

28:52you're asking a question you already know the answer to. And then when my answer is not the

28:58same, it's the same general framework, but it's not the exact same answer as I made previously.

29:02You're accusing me of dodging the question of being hypocritical and all of that. And that's,

29:08you know, that's just unpleasant people, people of quality, people of decent self-esteem.

29:14Uh, they just won't want to deal with you. Like it's a funny thing in life. Like you really got

29:18to understand this. When you become an adult, nobody has to deal with you. Nobody has to deal

29:25with you. Nobody has to interact with you. So how is it that you are going to live a life where

29:31people want to interact with you? Right. It's really, really, really important. Why would

29:38somebody want to engage with you when you're like this, right? Why? I mean, I have a great life. I

29:44have a wonderful family. I have great friends. Uh, I have a deeper, meaningful work and so on.

29:49Right. So why would I want to interact with somebody who accuses me of these negative things,

29:55who asks me a question he already knows the answer to, and then tries to trap me in some

30:00kind of hypocrisy? Like, why, why would, why would I want to interact with someone like that?

30:06That's just a really important question. In life, in life, my friends, you must be a net positive

30:13for quality people to want to interact with you. You must be a net positive. You must be a net

30:18positive. Their lives must be better because you're interacting with them. Now, this doesn't

30:24mean that you can't sell some blunt truths that might be upsetting from time to time, but overall,

30:28in general, as a whole, would you pay $200 a month to a personal trainer when you would,

30:36when you follow his advice to the letter and you get fatter and slower and more tired and more

30:41lethargic? Would you voluntarily go to a restaurant where you hate the food? Would you go to see a

30:50singer whose voice you and music you despise? Like, you just look in your life.

30:58Everything that you interact with, I guess he's trying to have some positive interaction for him,

31:02but at my expense, right? So this must be some, I've got it, man. There's this kind of weird,

31:06petty, silly, gotcha stuff, right? And, you know, maybe you can get me, right? Maybe I've

31:10made a contradiction. It's all perfectly possible and all of that. But this like vaguely sinister,

31:15oh yeah, well, why didn't you do this if that's the case? And I asked this question and you

31:21actually have a totally different answer last time. It's like, okay, well, if I had a different

31:24answer last time, which I didn't, then you can just point that out, right? No need for all the

31:30sinister impunity of motives and so on. So why would, you got to ask yourself this question.

31:37I'm not kidding. Every single day, you must ask yourself this question. How do people in my life

31:42benefit from me interacting with them? How do people that I want to interact with benefit from

31:49me interacting with them? So with me, you asked me a question. I gave an answer. You're not

31:54disagreeing with any of the answer. You're just saying you're making a bunch of assumptions,

31:58which are actually false. And you're impugning my motives and vaguely calling me hypocritical and

32:03eh, right? So it's like, well, why would I want to interact with you again? Why? I don't have to.

32:09It's not pleasant for me. And so this is just a repetition of pushing people away, right? I don't

32:15want you to live in a life with quality people, uh, stepping aside and out of the way from you.

32:19Right? So this is an appeal to insecurity. If I'm like, oh my God, maybe I really am hypocrite.

32:23I'd be sort of bound into this nonsense and I'd follow you into this maze that I was talking about

32:27at the beginning, but I'm not. So, so why, why would people want to interact with you? Why would

32:32I ever want to answer another question of yours? Why would I ever want to engage and interact with

32:36you in any way? I mean, I appreciate the support. I appreciate that if you're a donor, I appreciate

32:43that. That's wonderful. But, uh, you're not buying my time, right? You're supporting the show as a

32:48whole, which is the truth. And I'm telling you the truth and making my case for this. So this is a

32:53larger question for everyone. Everyone constantly think about this. When you go to work,

32:59are the customers, the boss, whoever better off for you being there. If you have a boss,

33:05are you happy to give him a portion of your salary? Cause he makes your life easier and

33:08better and more profitable. If you have a girlfriend, is her life better for you being

33:11in it? If you have friends as a whole, if you want to get married, are you saying to someone

33:15your life will be far better because I'm in it, right? Are you in that positive to the people

33:21in your life? And every time you interact with someone, you have to think about that until it

33:27becomes sort of an ingrained habit. I have it. I absolutely, in every interaction that I have

33:31everywhere in the world, I constantly strive to have people better off after they've talked to me

33:40than before they've talked to me. And even if that's an unpleasant thing in the moment,

33:44like I tell them a blunt truth, like I'm kind of doing now, my goal, of course,

33:47is out of a genuine affection for your potential to have you understand that when you behave in

33:52this way, quality people will avoid you. And the only people who will engage with this is

33:57half-wrecked, self-critical whoever's, right? I mean, you don't want that in your life. You want

34:01quality people in your life. You want confident people in your life. And the confident people

34:07in your life go through this calculation, right? So they interact with you. This is what happens.

34:12All quality people do this. I guarantee you. I've been around tons of quality people over the course

34:16of my life. I'm surrounded by quality people now. I speak for them with one voice, that when people

34:22interact with you, quality people interact with you. They're in touch with their feelings. They're

34:25in touch with their experience. And they say to themselves, am I better off for having interacted

34:30with this person? Now, when I get this kind of nonsense coming at me, I say to myself, huh,

34:38well, that was kind of unpleasant. And I made that reply. So I don't want to answer any more

34:43questions. I'm not obligated to. You can't hook me in while I'm a donor and you've got to answer

34:48my questions. It's like, no, I don't. I really don't. I really don't. Take your money and go

34:53if that's your expectation. So quality people, after you've interacted with them, will say,

35:02do I feel better or worse overall for having interacted with this person? And if you want

35:08quality people in your life, and quality people are people that you're better off after interacting

35:12with, if you want quality people in your life, then people have to be better off after interacting

35:19with you. I didn't like this interaction. I don't want to do it again, and so on. So you just won't

35:25have quality people in your life if you behave in this kind of way. And I sympathize with the source

35:29of it. I get manipulative parents and all of that, but it's unpleasant. And so why would people

35:37do that? Now, most people won't circle back and tell you this, right? So this is why I'm doing

35:41this. And most people won't circle back and tell you, huh, that was really kind of unpleasant,

35:47and here's why. Let me unpack it, and so on, right? Most people will just avoid you and move

35:51on in the same way that if you go to a restaurant and you have a meal you don't particularly like,

35:56you just don't go back. You don't go back and sit down with the chef and here are the ingredients

36:00and let me run through it, right? This is almost impossible to get feedback. I really want you to

36:06understand this. This is almost impossible to get feedback in your life. And so I hope that you will

36:14take it to heart and really, really listen, because I want you to have quality. I want

36:18everyone to have quality people in their lives, which means people have to be objectively and

36:22subjectively better off after interacting with you because, you know, that's economics, right?

36:26So it's got to be a win-win negotiation, right, for a transaction to be of value to both people.

36:32So, all right. So thanks, everyone, so much. Freedomain.com slash donate. Don't forget if

36:37you donate over the next couple of weeks, you get almost 12 hours of the truth about the French

36:44Revolution, which is really some of my greatest work on history. So it was really, really deep

36:48and powerful and a thesis that exists nowhere else to my knowledge. All right. Have yourself

36:53a wonderful afternoon. Talk to you soon. Bye.

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