The Three Badasses Who Want Me Full Movie
The Three Badasses Who Want Me Full Movie
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:00Ellen Musk, the only woman on the Forbes 30 under 30 list, arrives at Atlanta today.
00:00:11What a business tycoon is doing here in Georgia, a forgotten state one knows.
00:00:16Angela, my next door neighbor, still selling your hippie junk here?
00:00:20If your mother-in-law sees, she's going to throw a big fit again.
00:00:25Your mother-in-law was right about you.
00:00:28What's the point of watching the news all day about these moguls if you can't even apply
00:00:31it to your penniless self?
00:00:33And how do you know that this is none of my business?
00:00:37Alright, everybody get out!
00:00:40We got an important guest coming!
00:00:44You!
00:00:49You deaf?
00:00:50I scuff and scram!
00:00:51I paid the staff here already, and if you want me to leave, then fine, but you have
00:00:55to compensate for today's losses.
00:00:58You want to say that again?
00:01:01You know who's visiting today?
00:01:04Ellen freakin' Musk!
00:01:05One of the richest people in the world.
00:01:07Ellen Musk?
00:01:08Of course, a hick like you probably never heard of her.
00:01:11Just know that you can't afford to piss her off.
00:01:15Really?
00:01:16Ellen Musk is flying all the way to Atlanta just to come to some flea market?
00:01:21You don't think that she could be coming to see me?
00:01:26Coming to see you?
00:01:28Alright, you know what?
00:01:30I'll play your game.
00:01:31If she does this so much as give you a glance, I'll eat dirt.
00:01:38Deal.
00:01:47Ellen Musk, get to the flea market within ten minutes.
00:01:50Or else, you're fired.
00:01:55Hmm.
00:02:11Prepare the limo.
00:02:12Ms. Lockhart requires us immediately.
00:02:20Ten minutes is almost up.
00:02:22Good.
00:02:23Eight minutes.
00:02:25Five.
00:02:26Four.
00:02:29Three.
00:02:31Two.
00:02:33One.
00:02:36Ellen!
00:02:37Uh, I mean, Ms. Musk!
00:02:39Uh, Ellen!
00:02:40Uh, I mean, uh, I'm sorry that I, uh, sorry to frighten you.
00:02:46How's my boss bitch?
00:02:47Kickin' ass, girlfriend.
00:02:49So, how do you, like...
00:02:52She's my boss?
00:02:53Eh, I prefer business partner or best friend.
00:02:58No way.
00:03:02Well?
00:03:07No! No, no, I'm sorry for offending your boss!
00:03:09No, I won't do it again!
00:03:13Alright, that's enough.
00:03:15We're not tyrants here.
00:03:23Sir.
00:03:24My fellow Lockhart.
00:03:31You mean Angela Lockhart.
00:03:33The runaway bride.
00:03:36You lose one million dollars in just one game of poker.
00:03:40Who are you?
00:03:44Where is she?
00:03:45Atlanta.
00:03:46And you were right.
00:03:47It was secretly her propping up Ellen Musk.
00:03:49My clever bride.
00:03:51I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to.
00:03:58Max.
00:03:59Prep the jet.
00:04:00I'm heading to Atlanta.
00:04:06Dr. Wilson.
00:04:07Benning Sterling's on the move.
00:04:08He's headed to Atlanta.
00:04:09Atlanta?
00:04:10The game is afoot.
00:04:12I'm going.
00:04:13Wait, Dr. Wilson.
00:04:14The Prince of Bhutan needs your medical attention.
00:04:16He can wait.
00:04:17I need to pick up my bride.
00:04:22Dr. Wilson!
00:04:28General Eisenhower is here!
00:04:31Benning Sterling and Shane Wilson are headed to Atlanta!
00:04:34Atlanta!
00:04:36Where is that?
00:04:38Whatever! Prepare my war plate!
00:04:40Don't you bring out my fiancée.
00:04:43This is war.
00:04:49No.
00:04:52No!
00:04:59I've secretly allowed your husband, Jared Cooper, to win the bid on the Maple Plaza project like you asked me to.
00:05:05Thank you so much, Ellen.
00:05:07This is going to be the best anniversary gift ever.
00:05:10That project is worth billions.
00:05:12He can finally take his cutlery.
00:05:14But, Angela.
00:05:16My boss.
00:05:18I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes without ever revealing your true identity.
00:05:24Without your backing.
00:05:26No offense, but he's nothing without you.
00:05:29Well, three years ago.
00:05:48You saved me.
00:05:53He saved me and I fell in love with him instantly.
00:05:57I didn't want my true identity because I didn't want him to feel the pressure of being with a billionaire heiress.
00:06:03But now, with this contract, I feel like we'll be on more equal footing and then I can finally come out to the public.
00:06:10So that's why you have me secretly helping him.
00:06:12I'm sure he'll be moved when he finds out.
00:06:16But why work at the flea market?
00:06:19Are you disguising yourself to test him?
00:06:23Well, these exotic spices are incredibly rare and cost a fortune to find.
00:06:28Plus, I get to make the best dishes for my hubby and his mom.
00:06:32You seem happy being a housewife.
00:06:34Where the hell are you?
00:06:36Don't tell me you were selling junk at the flea market again.
00:06:39Get home, stat.
00:06:41It's a big day today.
00:06:44That was...
00:06:46My mother-in-law, Carol.
00:06:48She judges me because she thinks I come from a lower-class family.
00:06:51But she's going to be ecstatic tonight when I finally come out and tell her who I really am.
00:06:56I don't know what to do.
00:06:58I don't know what to do.
00:07:00I don't know what to do.
00:07:01She's going to be ecstatic tonight when I finally come out and tell her who I really am.
00:07:06You know, she even remembered our 30-year anniversary.
00:07:14Please spend more time with my son.
00:07:18Hi, I'm home.
00:07:20I have a big announcement I have to make.
00:07:23Finally, you're back. Now stop...
00:07:24Divorce papers.
00:07:27Divorce papers?
00:07:28Divorce papers.
00:07:31Is this some sort of misunderstanding, Mom?
00:07:34God, don't call me Mom again.
00:07:37We're ending that relationship.
00:07:39Just look at you. Dirt all over.
00:07:42You're selling the title of Mrs. Cooper.
00:07:44You don't deserve my son. You're way below his league.
00:07:48I'm below his league?
00:07:50That's right. You are.
00:07:53Jared is signing a $100 billion contract tomorrow with the Ellen Musk.
00:07:59And then his company's going public.
00:08:01That's how much he's accomplished in three years.
00:08:04But you? You're still just a stinky hippie peddler.
00:08:10Jared's like the king in the clouds. And you...
00:08:13You will always just be a pawn.
00:08:17Like dirt on our shoes.
00:08:22Dirt on your shoes?
00:08:24But Ellen Musk works for me.
00:08:27You're delusional. You will never upgrade to a queen.
00:08:32How dare you compare yourself to the real deal here.
00:08:37Resorting to lies is definitely not good enough for Jared.
00:08:41And who are you to my house and meddle with my family matters?
00:08:48You're nothing but a pathetic excuse for a wife.
00:08:53Jared deserves a queen like Kaylee.
00:08:56Not a lowlife dirtbag.
00:08:58Enough!
00:09:00Jared, I knew you wouldn't divorce me.
00:09:04But I am.
00:09:06Don't fight it.
00:09:08Here's $500,000.
00:09:10You'll never make this much as a hippie peddler of spices.
00:09:14Now sign the papers, take your check, and leave.
00:09:17Don't embarrass yourself further.
00:09:20I've done.
00:09:22So much for you these past three years.
00:09:25Did that not mean anything to you?
00:09:28Didn't expect you to be so greedy.
00:09:30Fine. Here's another $200,000.
00:09:34$500,000 is too much for her already.
00:09:37She's done nothing.
00:09:39Hasn't even contributed a grandchild.
00:09:42She just sells cheap grass all day.
00:09:45Is that really how much I'm worth to all of you?
00:09:49I took care of both of you these past three years.
00:09:53You think we can't just hire a maid to cook for us or something?
00:09:58And she wouldn't embarrass us with that permanent stench?
00:10:02A hippie peddler becoming the wife of a CEO?
00:10:06What a joke.
00:10:08If you actually love my son,
00:10:10you'll sign the damn divorce papers already.
00:10:13And leave!
00:10:15You really think that Jared would have gotten that Maple Plaza bid without me?
00:10:21Let alone taking the company public?
00:10:23I did everything for you, Jared.
00:10:27Now you take credit for my son's success?
00:10:33It's all my work!
00:10:37Baby, we're going to be late for the auction
00:10:40if we keep letting this psycho stall us.
00:10:45You did say you would win me Princess Anna's tiara, didn't you?
00:10:49So, she's the reason for the divorce.
00:10:53She's worth more than you, Angela.
00:10:57Fine.
00:10:59I'll sign it.
00:11:01But don't regret it.
00:11:04Regret?
00:11:06Do I know who I am?
00:11:07Yeah, a cockroach that only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:11:11I'm Eric Vanderbilt's daughter.
00:11:15Jared bid on Maple Plaza was because of my dad.
00:11:20Because he's business partners with Elon Musk.
00:11:23It's part of the power that I have.
00:11:28You can't do shit because you're poor.
00:11:31Social stratum matters.
00:11:34Yeah, social stratum does.
00:11:37It does matter.
00:11:39And the Coopers are beneath me.
00:11:42And you really think Elon Musk would come to Atlanta if it weren't for me?
00:11:47Ha! You're delusional.
00:11:50Now sign the papers and scram!
00:11:56You owe me.
00:11:58You dirty bitch. You sicken me.
00:12:00Ah!
00:12:06You hit me.
00:12:10Now sign the papers, take your check, and get the fuck out!
00:12:13Get the fuck out!
00:12:28I don't need your penny money.
00:12:32We're finished.
00:12:34You don't want the money? That's your loss.
00:12:37Your check is just pennies to me.
00:12:40But I would like my ring back.
00:12:43Wow.
00:12:52Have fun on your economy flight while I catch a ride on my private helicopter out of here.
00:13:02And I'm way out of your league.
00:13:09Isn't that the Winston Blue Diamond Ring?
00:13:13It's worth tens of millions of dollars.
00:13:17Oh, it's just cheap glass.
00:13:20Something she found at the flea market.
00:13:22You're right. She could never afford anything so expensive.
00:13:28Congrats, Jared Boo Boo, on getting rid of that dirt bag.
00:13:33Oh! My dad says there's going to be a secret big shot financial tycoon at tomorrow's summit.
00:13:40Bigger big shot than Elon Musk?
00:13:43Yeah. And nobody's met them, but I can introduce you.
00:13:48Everything's thanks to you, babe.
00:14:06Angela, Mr. Vanderbilt, the richest man in Georgia, wants to schedule a meeting before the bidding.
00:14:11Fit?
00:14:12Yeah, he's actually CEO of one of our companies. Basically our employee.
00:14:16Okay, I'll meet him at the summit tomorrow. It's fine.
00:14:19You're still going to the summit tomorrow? But you and Jared Cooper are already divorced.
00:14:23That's exactly why I'm going.
00:14:42Angela Lockhart. I found you.
00:14:47Who is he?
00:14:49That? That's Devin Sterling.
00:14:52He's number one on Forbes' 30 under 30 list, an early investor of crypto, CEO of Sterling Enterprises.
00:14:59Rumor has it he's worth trillions.
00:15:01And he's your fiancé.
00:15:04What? What? My fiancé?
00:15:07The one and only.
00:15:10So, after running away and leaving me single for three years,
00:15:15have you figured out how you're going to make it up to me yet, babe?
00:15:27That tiara looks perfect on you.
00:15:33What is your name?
00:15:36What is she doing here?
00:15:41You skank. My son just divorced you yesterday and you're already hooking up with another man?
00:15:48Divorced?
00:15:50That's right. So, I guess this was never meant to be.
00:15:56Sterling.
00:15:59So she has to hide her marital status to find another man.
00:16:02Guess she's not just a forsaken woman. She's also a stinky, penniless whore.
00:16:10How dare you insult my boss like that.
00:16:14Who the fuck are you, bitch?
00:16:17Do you know who I...
00:16:19They don't know who you are.
00:16:22You hide it well.
00:16:24X-Team! Teach these fools a lesson.
00:16:29Teach these fools a lesson.
00:16:33Sir, you were kind of in a rush when you flew to Atlanta and then tonight you forgot to bring the security team.
00:16:46Mind if I borrow your men?
00:16:49No, I'm good.
00:16:53Toss these ill-mannered apes out.
00:16:56You bitch. I'll have my son teach you a lesson.
00:17:03A kiss as a reward, my lady.
00:17:07No.
00:17:15Guest list is very distinguished tonight.
00:17:18You've got Bill Ford, Harvey Buffett, old money like me.
00:17:24Gentlemen, Harvey, Bill, this is Jared Cooper.
00:17:26Pleased to meet you all. Your families all started empires after the Industrial Revolution. What an honor.
00:17:32I heard you secured the Maple Plaza project. It's worth billions of dollars. Congrats. You'll be next.
00:17:39Thank you. But we haven't received the contract yet. We deserve it.
00:17:43Oh, that's nothing. I introduced this kid to Ellen Musk.
00:17:46Vanderbilt and Musk have always had a good relationship.
00:17:49So, thought I'd help the kid out, pull a few strings.
00:17:53Thank you, Mr. Manning.
00:17:54Now, we just have to impress Miss Musk's special guest of honor.
00:17:58Yes. I heard they're a very important, powerful guest. Even wealthier than Ellen Musk.
00:18:06Now, if we can just secure a position with this big shot, we can feast for generations.
00:18:15I'll do my best.
00:18:17I'll do my best.
00:18:23Excuse me. A second, gentlemen.
00:18:26What if it's the Prince of Bhutan?
00:18:30How did a hobo like you sneak in here?
00:18:33A hobo? How did a cheating scumbag like you sneak in here? You sleep your way in?
00:18:39I told you, Angela Lockhart, don't bother stalking me. Nothing will come of it, and it only sickens me further.
00:18:44Don't flatter yourself.
00:18:49This is your ex-husband?
00:18:53Unfolded when you married him?
00:18:55Who the hell is this? You were cheating on me?
00:18:59Son, you have to avenge me and Kaylee.
00:19:03That wicked ex-wife of yours hired some thugs and a gigolo to beat us up.
00:19:08They even took Kaylee's tiara.
00:19:18I'm sorry.
00:19:20I'm sorry.
00:19:22I'm sorry.
00:19:24I'm sorry.
00:19:25I'm sorry.
00:19:34You dare hurt my mom and Kaylee?
00:19:39Get your hands off of her.
00:19:45My lady.
00:19:55My queen.
00:20:07It's...
00:20:09It's him!
00:20:11He scammed a million dollars off me in a game of poker yesterday.
00:20:15Who are these peasants?
00:20:17These seats are reserved for the Ellen Musk and her special guest.
00:20:22Oh, shut up.
00:20:23You're disturbing the peace.
00:20:27Fuckers, you know who that is?
00:20:29That's Eric Vanderbilt.
00:20:31You have any idea how many generations of wealth he has?
00:20:34His ancestors built the railway and steamship empire of America.
00:20:38This civil war would not have been won without his family's involvement.
00:20:42Vanderbilt.
00:20:44The father of that skank, Kaylee Vanderbilt,
00:20:48who only knows how to crawl her way out of the house.
00:20:50Kaylee Vanderbilt.
00:20:52Who only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:20:56That's the Lee Vanderbilt family.
00:21:05Oh, goddammit.
00:21:07Stomachache now?
00:21:12Whatever.
00:21:14Angela can handle herself. She'll be fine.
00:21:21How dare you call one of us low?
00:21:24I'm Harvey F. M. Buffett,
00:21:26the most important investor in the entire stock market.
00:21:29I can wipe you out with a simple pinky only.
00:21:34And I can wipe you out with just a strand of my hair.
00:21:38Not with me around.
00:21:40I, Bill Ford, and the entire Ford Auto Empire stand with Deezer.
00:21:44Deezer.
00:21:46Deezer.
00:21:47I, Bill Ford, and the entire Ford Auto Empire stand with Deezer.
00:21:51You're all just peasants compared to who I really am.
00:21:56You're fucking delusional, Angela.
00:21:58I've had enough of your games.
00:22:00Security.
00:22:02Break their limbs and toss them out.
00:22:04Looks like the old guard is teaming up against you.
00:22:08You got new money here.
00:22:11I can handle myself, thank you.
00:22:14Yes, my queen.
00:22:16You're all despicable.
00:22:19An insult to your family names.
00:22:24Now, it's my turn to rule.
00:22:27Destroy Jared Cooper.
00:22:30Call business ties.
00:22:32And if you don't,
00:22:35I will take away all of your family's wealth and power.
00:22:40I knew it.
00:22:42You're here to fuck with me.
00:22:43You can't fool anyone here.
00:22:45How much money did you spend on that getup to hire that gigolo to make me jealous?
00:22:49You're an orphan who sells hippie spices at a flea market.
00:22:53You have nothing.
00:22:55And you will always be nothing.
00:22:57She's a gold digger.
00:23:00Gold digger.
00:23:02Gigolo.
00:23:04Want to try me for a night?
00:23:06Yeah, you're a little too pricey.
00:23:08Mr. Vanderbilt, we can keep these bandits here any longer.
00:23:10They might upset Ms. Ellen Musk and her special guest, Angela Lockhart, her ex-wife.
00:23:15She's only here to try and ruin my bill in the Maple Plaza project.
00:23:18Oh, I'm gonna kill that sushi chef.
00:23:20Security!
00:23:25Security!
00:23:27You all don't say you actually all work for me.
00:23:30And now you're trying to throw a coup?
00:23:32You!
00:23:34Insolent fools.
00:23:37Let me guess, you're that special guest?
00:23:41I don't know.
00:23:43Throw them out!
00:23:45And not without some broken bones, too.
00:23:53Back to our mess.
00:23:58I got this.
00:24:10I got this.
00:24:26What the hell are you two doing here?
00:24:28I thought we were supposed to guard you.
00:24:30No, you're supposed to make sure Ms. Lockhart is okay.
00:24:33Oh my god, we're so screwed!
00:24:41Angela!
00:24:43Don't hurt her!
00:24:45You bitch.
00:24:47You just threw yourself at me.
00:24:49How dare you insult my boss like that?
00:24:51Boss?
00:24:53Did she say her boss?
00:24:55Ms. Musk?
00:24:57That's Ellen Musk?
00:24:59That woman right there is Angela Lockhart.
00:25:01My boss and sole heiress to Lockhart's fortune.
00:25:03Their lineage is older than this country itself.
00:25:06Past the American Revolution?
00:25:08Back to the Renaissance.
00:25:10If she's your boss,
00:25:12then that means Angela Lockhart is...
00:25:14That's Lady Lockhart to you.
00:25:16She's royalty.
00:25:18And since you're all subsidiaries,
00:25:20she's your boss's boss.
00:25:22What the hell did you do?
00:25:24Kneel!
00:25:26Oh, your majesty.
00:25:28Welcome to the United States.
00:25:30We've always been your loyal subjects.
00:25:32Yes, your highness.
00:25:34Is it a queen or princess?
00:25:36It doesn't matter.
00:25:37My queen,
00:25:39please forgive our insolence.
00:25:41We didn't mean to offend.
00:25:43Hey, what are you doing, you idiot?
00:25:45Let go of the boss lady
00:25:47and beg for forgiveness!
00:25:57What rightfully belongs to you.
00:26:08She's a badass herself.
00:26:10He missed out on a good wife.
00:26:12You!
00:26:14You!
00:26:16You told me your wife was a Hitler.
00:26:18Turns out you were the freeloading scumbag.
00:26:20No, no, don't believe their lies.
00:26:22I worked hard for everything.
00:26:24You worked for everything?
00:26:32I'm sorry.
00:26:34I'm sorry.
00:26:36Hi, honey.
00:26:38So, our 30th anniversary is coming up
00:26:41and I thought that maybe we can do something special.
00:26:44I can't focus on anything trivial like that.
00:26:46I have to figure out this bid for the Maple Closet project
00:26:49and if I get it, I can take the company public.
00:26:59You were nothing before me.
00:27:02All your achievements,
00:27:03all your glory,
00:27:05that's all mine!
00:27:07Including the Maple Closet contract.
00:27:10I can take all of that away.
00:27:13Just like that.
00:27:15No, you can't take that away!
00:27:17That's why Elon Musk was urging us to pass on deals to nobody.
00:27:20Oh, and this antique wedding ring?
00:27:23Yeah, I feel you.
00:27:25It was Queen Victoria's
00:27:27and its worth is equivalent to more than an entire country's GDP.
00:27:34Oh, no.
00:27:36I gave you back the ring?
00:27:38I divorced a royal heiress?
00:27:41No, no, please, no!
00:27:44No, please take me back, baby!
00:27:46I still love you!
00:27:50Oh, man, looks like they've started the party without us.
00:27:53No one's allowed to start a fight without Cole Eisenhower!
00:27:56God, these two again.
00:27:58Did he say...
00:28:00Is he Cole Eisenhower?
00:28:02President Eisenhower's descendant.
00:28:04After General Eisenhower won World War II,
00:28:06each of his descendants have all gone on to become five-star generals,
00:28:10the highest rank in the nation's military.
00:28:12Bloody buffoons know your history!
00:28:14Sorry I'm late, babe.
00:28:16I got lost trying to find Atlanta,
00:28:18then lost again on my way back to New York.
00:28:20And that there is,
00:28:22that is the legendary boy genius, Dr. Wilson.
00:28:26He's Dr. House's protege!
00:28:28Dr. House?
00:28:30I thought that was just a TV show.
00:28:32Oh, no, that's based on real figures.
00:28:34Yep, that's me.
00:28:36Son of James House.
00:28:38Dr. House, he's practically my uncle.
00:28:40I correctly diagnosed the Pope before him
00:28:42when I was just 12 years old.
00:28:44So he's basically my uncle.
00:28:46He's my uncle.
00:28:47I correctly diagnosed the Pope before him
00:28:49when I was just 12 years old.
00:28:51So he's been off crying himself a waterfall
00:28:53somewhere in the Netherlands for the last 15 months.
00:28:56And I'm late because I ran out of gum
00:28:58and had to make a pit stop.
00:29:03Hey, Ellen.
00:29:05Who are these weebs and why are they here?
00:29:07Uh, they're all your fiancées.
00:29:10What?
00:29:12Fiancées?
00:29:14Plural?
00:29:15Watch it, nerds!
00:29:17I'm her fiancée!
00:29:19No, I'm her fiancée!
00:29:21You can both shut up!
00:29:23I'm her fiancée!
00:29:25It's you!
00:29:27It's me!
00:29:29Who the hell is he?
00:29:31I'm Spider-Man.
00:29:33How are all three of these men my fiancée?
00:29:35Your father had arranged these engagements years ago,
00:29:37but I didn't tell you
00:29:39because you decided to marry Jared Cooper at the time.
00:29:41She has three badass fiancées
00:29:42and she marries his dumb ass.
00:29:46Whatever.
00:29:48Since you're all here,
00:29:50help me finish him.
00:29:53Since you're all here,
00:29:55help me finish him.
00:29:58At your service!
00:30:00Me too.
00:30:06One down, two more to go.
00:30:08She's become queen!
00:30:10Bishop to G,
00:30:12A4.
00:30:16Ow! Ow! Ow!
00:30:18What is that?
00:30:20The most German-fest
00:30:22in water in the Nile River.
00:30:26Rook to A8.
00:30:32Hello?
00:30:35I thought I was king!
00:30:37No, you wish.
00:30:39The king doesn't do anything,
00:30:40but Alan can be my king.
00:30:42Oh, fine.
00:30:46Bankrupt to four,
00:30:48it's right this second.
00:30:53I...
00:30:55I've been bankrupt!
00:30:57No!
00:30:59Who is he?
00:31:05I've been bankrupt!
00:31:07No!
00:31:08I told you I would remove all of you
00:31:10from status and power if you didn't cooperate.
00:31:12Well, guess what?
00:31:14Game over.
00:31:16All right, boys,
00:31:18let's figure out this four-way engagement.
00:31:20Oh, that's serious business.
00:31:22Wait for me!
00:31:24Nobody beats me to the finish line!
00:31:34Angela!
00:31:36You already have three fiancés?
00:31:39You can't accuse me of cheating.
00:31:41I want compensation.
00:31:45You greedy SOB.
00:31:47Who the fuck is that?
00:31:49My ex-husband.
00:31:51You were married?
00:31:53Yeah, and if that's a problem for you,
00:31:55then you can totally back out of this engagement.
00:31:57More for me.
00:31:59No, no, of course not.
00:32:01Just...
00:32:03Do you want me to check your eyes for you?
00:32:05Fuck!
00:32:07I can make him decide my choice.
00:32:09All evidence of your past with him.
00:32:11What?
00:32:13Is there something on my face?
00:32:15Uh, yeah.
00:32:17Murderous intent.
00:32:19Let's remarry.
00:32:21Let's remarry.
00:32:23You still don't realize.
00:32:25I only fell in love with you,
00:32:27saved me from drowning three years ago.
00:32:35Fuck.
00:32:50Sir, it's an emergency.
00:32:52We need to wreck right away.
00:32:54Nicole Eisenhower and Shane Wilson
00:32:56are causing mayhem at the company warehouse.
00:32:58Okay, I'm on my way.
00:33:02She should be okay now.
00:33:06Hey, you!
00:33:08Watch over here.
00:33:10I'll be right back.
00:33:18You saved me.
00:33:22Fuck.
00:33:24I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:33:27Fuck.
00:33:29I unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:33:31You've cheated on me,
00:33:33you've hit me,
00:33:35you've insulted me.
00:33:37And after all,
00:33:39I never want to see you again.
00:33:41I fucking hate you.
00:33:43Lady Lockhart.
00:33:45What?
00:33:46What now?
00:33:48Yes, we understand that you are
00:33:50a very busy person,
00:33:52but if you're not going to give your ex-husband
00:33:54the Maple Plaza project...
00:33:56How about us three?
00:33:58Yes, unlike that scumbag,
00:34:00we won't turn on you.
00:34:02Yeah, no.
00:34:03Okay.
00:34:05This is your fault!
00:34:07We never should have believed your bullshit!
00:34:09No, no.
00:34:11We made our decisions
00:34:13with Ellen Musk and the Lockharts.
00:34:15How can that be?
00:34:17I'll get you for this!
00:34:24I never should have listened to you.
00:34:26I'm ruined because of you!
00:34:34So,
00:34:36what's the situation here?
00:34:38I don't want to marry you!
00:34:48I don't want to marry you!
00:34:51Listen,
00:34:53I only met you guys a few hours ago,
00:34:56and I'm not interested in flying.
00:34:58I don't want to marry you!
00:35:00I don't want to marry you!
00:35:01I only met you a few hours ago,
00:35:03and I'm not interested in flash marriages.
00:35:05What if I told you
00:35:07that we've known each other for much longer
00:35:09than just a few hours?
00:35:11Longer?
00:35:14Angela?
00:35:16Your parents would like to have a video call
00:35:18with all of you.
00:35:22My lovely princess, how are you?
00:35:25Look, your mother and I are in Italy!
00:35:27The views here are absolutely stunning!
00:35:29Perfect for a wedding, you say?
00:35:31I heard you finally divorced
00:35:33that good-for-nothing,
00:35:35blood-sucking,
00:35:37three-letter husband of yours.
00:35:39Can't call his name, but...
00:35:41Anyway, congratulations!
00:35:43I've selected three prime young men
00:35:45for you to choose from
00:35:47to replace him.
00:35:49You must pick one of them to marry,
00:35:51otherwise...
00:35:53Let me do it.
00:35:55You must choose one of them
00:35:57in seven days,
00:35:59or we'll kill ourselves.
00:36:01Mom!
00:36:03Alright honey, that's it.
00:36:05Bye!
00:36:10So, who are you going to choose?
00:36:14Well,
00:36:16what if I want all three of you?
00:36:19Well,
00:36:21what if I want all three of you?
00:36:25That seems greedy.
00:36:30But,
00:36:32I can always remove the other twops.
00:36:35Hey,
00:36:37I may be dirty,
00:36:39but I can take lives too.
00:36:41I know and have access
00:36:43to all the deadliest poisons in the world.
00:36:45Whoa, okay.
00:36:47No murder, please.
00:36:49I was just kidding.
00:36:51You have seven days to win her over.
00:36:53Ooh,
00:36:55it's like The Bachelorette.
00:36:57I know.
00:37:00Welcome to the show,
00:37:02The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
00:37:04Today,
00:37:06we have our first challenge.
00:37:09What is all of this, Ellen?
00:37:12You'll see.
00:37:20Oh my god, oh my god,
00:37:22cockroaches!
00:37:24All women are afraid of cockroaches,
00:37:26and it is every man's job
00:37:27to remove their beloved woman
00:37:29from this monstrosity of a creature.
00:37:31What will our three candidates do
00:37:33to prove their undying love
00:37:35for our single lady,
00:37:37but screaming her head off heiress?
00:37:46Looks like one of our contestants
00:37:48is already gone.
00:37:50It's up to the final two.
00:37:57Oh my god.
00:38:13It's crunchy.
00:38:15That is sick cold.
00:38:17Hey, when you're stranded
00:38:19in the middle of the battlefield,
00:38:21you'll be glad to see one of these.
00:38:23They're left.
00:38:25Want to try one?
00:38:28Oh my god, save me.
00:38:30Save you? You're going to save me!
00:38:34I'm a German folk doctor.
00:38:36These hands can't get germs on them.
00:38:38They're for surgery and saving lives.
00:38:54Thank god you're here.
00:38:58Are you alright, honey?
00:39:00Angela!
00:39:04Alright, you won the first challenge,
00:39:06so you're a reward.
00:39:08You get to watch over her for the night.
00:39:10Just don't cross the line,
00:39:12if you know what I mean.
00:39:14I'm not her scumbag husband.
00:39:16You have nothing to worry about.
00:39:20Honestly, even if you cook,
00:39:22it's not like it's against the rules or anything.
00:39:24At least my girlfriend gets some.
00:39:25I bet her husband has a small dick anyway.
00:39:30The cockroaches!
00:39:32They're gone, they're gone.
00:39:34In this room, except you and me, okay?
00:39:36I'm going to kill Ellen
00:39:38when I see her tomorrow.
00:39:42I need a drink.
00:39:51Whoa, easy!
00:39:53You're on an empty stomach.
00:39:55Why do you care?
00:39:57I'm trying to drink away your sorrows, Angela.
00:40:02You guys were right.
00:40:04I was blind from marrying that asshole.
00:40:07You know,
00:40:09I wasted three whole years of my life with him.
00:40:13He never even loved me.
00:40:15And I gave up my entire career for him.
00:40:21Do you really think that you would still be number one
00:40:23on the Forbes 30 under 30 list if I was around?
00:40:29You may not be number one on Forbes list,
00:40:31but you know what your number one did?
00:40:37Your number one here.
00:40:44You know, we've known each other kind of a long time.
00:40:47Lies.
00:40:50You all just want something from me.
00:40:54Angela,
00:40:57I know it's hard to trust again,
00:41:00but I assure you,
00:41:02I don't care what family you're from.
00:41:07I'm the richest man in the nation.
00:41:09I don't need your power,
00:41:11your status, your wealth, your connections.
00:41:16I just need you.
00:41:20I'll prove myself to you.
00:41:22I'll prove my love to you within six days.
00:41:25I promise.
00:41:36Screw the contest.
00:41:38I deserve.
00:41:41Angela,
00:41:43you're drunk.
00:41:45I'm an adult.
00:41:46Can't I go just get what she wants?
00:41:48Okay.
00:41:52But love and sex aren't exactly the same thing.
00:41:56Well, they're not mutually exclusive either.
00:42:08This is what you want.
00:42:22I love you.
00:42:36Nine inch penis.
00:42:38Morning to you too.
00:42:40You sure you were drunk last night?
00:42:43A girl remembers when she's had a nine inch penis inside of her.
00:42:49Well, glad you enjoyed it.
00:42:51But don't tell Shane or Cole,
00:42:54because then they would...
00:42:56Say that you were being unfair?
00:42:58Technically, us having sex doesn't break any rules.
00:43:01I won the first challenge,
00:43:03and according to Ellen,
00:43:05my prize was to spend a night with you anyways.
00:43:08Don't make this any harder than it already is.
00:43:14You sure you don't want it pretty hard?
00:43:18Stop.
00:43:21Fine, fine, fine.
00:43:25I won't tell.
00:43:28On one condition.
00:43:31I won't tell.
00:43:34But only on one condition.
00:43:36You have to go out on a date with me.
00:43:39Fine.
00:43:43I've had a crush on you since college, Angela.
00:43:47You never noticed me.
00:43:52You should get dressed and get...
00:43:55Before anyone sees you.
00:43:58It's only 7am.
00:44:00She's still sleeping.
00:44:01I'm not sleeping alone.
00:44:02Yeah, I'm not letting my fiance be alone with another man for another second.
00:44:08Morning, gentlemen.
00:44:10Or shall I say ruffmen?
00:44:12Oh, don't mind him.
00:44:14What's up, guys?
00:44:16We're ready for the second challenge.
00:44:18No cockroaches this time.
00:44:19Yes, no more terrifying things.
00:44:21That was my bad, Angela.
00:44:23This better be a good challenge, Ellen.
00:44:25I'm sure you'll all enjoy this one.
00:44:27The second challenge is...
00:44:29The second challenge is...
00:44:31A date.
00:44:32Elaine, I should have asked for something else.
00:44:34A date?
00:44:36That's it.
00:44:37What's the catch?
00:44:38No catch.
00:44:39Just who Ms. Lockhart enjoys spending her time with the most.
00:44:42As simple as that.
00:44:43I know what I want to do.
00:44:44Let's start with me first.
00:44:45Okay.
00:44:46Who's up first, then?
00:44:47Me.
00:44:48Save the best for last.
00:44:50Night, Angela.
00:44:52Then it's decided.
00:44:56Please don't take my BMW away!
00:44:59Too bad.
00:45:01You pissed off the Lockharts.
00:45:03I have nothing left!
00:45:13It's that bitch who ruined me!
00:45:18It's that bitch who ruined me!
00:45:28Do you know Eisenhower, sir?
00:45:30At ease, Lieutenant!
00:45:32He also manages this boxing gym.
00:45:34Pleasure to meet you, Madam Eisenhower!
00:45:36He's so serious.
00:45:38But, hang on.
00:45:40Lieutenant, I don't know who I'm going to marry yet!
00:45:43Baby, I decided to take you here on our first date
00:45:45so that I can introduce you to my guns.
00:45:47Guns? Like, murder weapons?
00:45:50Yes.
00:45:52Murder weapons.
00:46:11You like my guns, babe?
00:46:13Pretty rock hard.
00:46:14Yeah.
00:46:16Let me show you what I can do with them.
00:46:18Lieutenant!
00:46:19Come close!
00:46:21Wait!
00:46:22You're just going to hit him like that?
00:46:23He's not even going to fight back?
00:46:25Fighting back would be treason, ma'am!
00:46:27Treason?
00:46:28You guys are way too serious.
00:46:31Look, you rock hard bitch!
00:46:32I caught you!
00:46:33If I'm going down,
00:46:34you're all going down with me!
00:46:36Lieutenant,
00:46:37here's your attack!
00:46:46Ah!
00:46:49You dare try to hurt my wife?
00:46:53I will make you pay!
00:46:56If you don't need to keep beating him up,
00:46:58we could just take him to the cops.
00:47:00Not when he tries to hurt you!
00:47:08Zoe's a bit violent.
00:47:10Some might call it being protective.
00:47:12Poor anger issues.
00:47:13What if we married
00:47:14and I forget to use a coaster
00:47:15on an antique table or something?
00:47:17Is he going to be, like, rough?
00:47:20Hey, some girls are into that.
00:47:22I don't know if I am.
00:47:25Well, maybe shame will be your type.
00:47:30Your date with Shane starts now.
00:47:35Hey.
00:47:37Hey.
00:47:38Cool ride.
00:47:40A gift from the Chancellor just arrived.
00:47:42A gift from the Chancellor of Germany
00:47:43when I saved his wife.
00:47:44Impressive.
00:47:48Your breath smells like peppermint.
00:47:51Refreshing.
00:47:53Cool mint, too.
00:47:55Or do you prefer spearmint?
00:47:58What do you not have in this coat of yours?
00:48:01Fruit-flavored gum.
00:48:02I can't stand those.
00:48:04So, where did you...
00:48:05Let me show you.
00:48:12Dr. Wilson!
00:48:15Our VIP of VIPs!
00:48:17Right this way.
00:48:18VIP of VIPs?
00:48:20Just some other guy I saved.
00:48:22I forget who.
00:48:23You saved a lot of people.
00:48:25I do what I can.
00:48:27Oh, my gosh.
00:48:29It's my gold-digging neighbor
00:48:30who just got dumped by her husband.
00:48:33Sandra Miller.
00:48:35What are you doing here?
00:48:36I just thought this was for the
00:48:37VIP of VIPs.
00:48:39Your mother-in-law told me
00:48:40all about the divorce
00:48:41and how you hired some gigolo
00:48:42to beat her and Kaylee Vanderbilt up.
00:48:46How low of you.
00:48:48What are you doing here, Sandra?
00:48:50Of course your bird-brain wouldn't remember.
00:48:52I sell high-fashion jewelry pieces
00:48:54so high-end,
00:48:55you couldn't even afford
00:48:56even a few soldier organs.
00:48:59The auction begins.
00:49:01I'll deal with you later.
00:49:04Here, I'll just be outside.
00:49:10Cameron,
00:49:12I have a task for you.
00:49:15Our next piece is
00:49:16absolutely extraordinary.
00:49:19Cleopatra's armband.
00:49:21Sold by our vendor,
00:49:23Sandra Miller.
00:49:24Five million dollars.
00:49:27Excuse me.
00:49:29I'd like to donate this to auction.
00:49:31It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:49:34I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:49:36It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:49:38What are you doing?
00:49:39Just watch.
00:49:46That is Queen Victoria's ring?
00:49:48Please.
00:49:49I'm an expert in not to fake.
00:49:51She probably got it
00:49:52at the flea market she works at.
00:49:54You work at a flea market?
00:49:56Not this again.
00:49:57Cut the bullshit.
00:49:58That wouldn't even be five dollars.
00:50:00Oh yeah?
00:50:01Here, you want it?
00:50:02For free.
00:50:03Ew!
00:50:04I don't want that trash
00:50:05from a stinky hippie peddler.
00:50:07Well,
00:50:08that's too bad then
00:50:09because you are the fraud.
00:50:13What are you talking about?
00:50:14And who the hell are you
00:50:15to accuse me?
00:50:16Throw them out!
00:50:18Dr. Wilson,
00:50:19I know you're a legend in medicine,
00:50:21but we're professionals.
00:50:23Oh yeah?
00:50:24And that armband
00:50:25sells for five million dollars?
00:50:28Yeah.
00:50:29Mine is the real thing.
00:50:30You two are just upset
00:50:31because you're too
00:50:32poor
00:50:33to afford our luxury items.
00:50:36Why is that so?
00:50:37When a so-called expert
00:50:38failed to recognize
00:50:39Queen Victoria's ring then?
00:50:42Dear Lord,
00:50:44this is real.
00:50:46It's authentic.
00:50:47It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:50:53Karen,
00:50:54what have you found?
00:50:55Yeah,
00:50:56that picture of Cleopatra's
00:50:57armband you sent me,
00:50:58it's a replica.
00:51:01They had the same one
00:51:02right here at the flea market.
00:51:04So,
00:51:06you're the fraud.
00:51:08So you just went to the flea market
00:51:09so you can buy suits?
00:51:11And Cameron,
00:51:12how much are these fakes
00:51:13being sold for?
00:51:14One fifty.
00:51:16Wow.
00:51:17Not even five dollars.
00:51:19Sandra.
00:51:20You've been
00:51:21duping us
00:51:22the whole time?
00:51:23Arrest her!
00:51:25No!
00:51:26Please!
00:51:27Even just this one time!
00:51:28Please!
00:51:29What's going on, Dr. Wilson?
00:51:31Uh,
00:51:32investigating lead poisoning
00:51:33from cheap jewelry
00:51:34for the Emperor of Japan.
00:51:35Bye!
00:51:36Blacklist her
00:51:37from the jewelry industry
00:51:38forever.
00:51:47I had a really
00:51:48great time tonight.
00:51:49Me too.
00:51:51May I
00:51:52have a kiss?
00:52:06Something wrong?
00:52:07Do you always
00:52:08have gum in your mouth?
00:52:15Yep.
00:52:16You never have to worry
00:52:17about stinky breath from me.
00:52:26Ha!
00:52:28You
00:52:29owe us
00:52:30a bunch of money.
00:52:32I don't have
00:52:33any money.
00:52:34How did you pay
00:52:35for this hotel then?
00:52:37I guess
00:52:38you'll only pay up
00:52:41if I break
00:52:42your other leg.
00:52:43Stop!
00:52:51I had a really
00:52:52great time tonight.
00:52:54Me too.
00:52:55May I
00:52:56have a kiss?
00:53:05You
00:53:06owe us
00:53:07a bunch of money.
00:53:09Ha!
00:53:11You
00:53:12owe us
00:53:13a bunch of money.
00:53:14Do you always have gum in your mouth?
00:53:21Yep, you never have to worry about stinky breath for me
00:53:34You owe us a bunch of money
00:53:39I don't have any money. How did you pay for this hotel then?
00:53:43I guess you'll only pay up if I break your other leg
00:53:54Mr. Vanderbilt
00:53:57Mr. Buffett
00:54:02This is the contract for the maple plaza project, that's right. This must be given to you
00:54:08New Angelo is still in love with me. I
00:54:12Knew Angela was still in love with me. No. No, sir. Sorry about those injuries from earlier. It was all just
00:54:20Yeah, we could be partners again
00:54:23And then maybe you can
00:54:25Tell the lady Lockhart put in a good word for us. Mm-hmm. Angela still loves me. She's just throwing a fit
00:54:31She'll be back to me soon enough. Yeah, do you need any help winning her back? We can give you jewelry to give to her. I
00:54:39Was just up to these pricks a few days ago, but now they're all begging me to help them out
00:54:44Feels so damn good to be in power
00:54:47Sure
00:54:48I'll put in a good word for you. I need anything you tell us we'll give you anything
00:54:54Once I take everything from these idiots, I'll go after Angela Lockhart for my revenge
00:55:01I'm
00:55:07Giving the contract to Trevor Cooper just like you asked me to well done. He'll be fucked soon
00:55:14Well done he'll be fucked soon I'll get it miss musk a contract has a preliminary clause
00:55:20Requires him to pay 50% of the costs up front of the deposit. You can't then what?
00:55:25They'll be bankrupt. So as long as his greedy have to take it
00:55:30I'm avenging my best friend. I want to show the world that without Angela Lockhart. He's nothing
00:55:42I
00:55:43signed the maple plaza project
00:55:45We should celebrate you did
00:55:48See, I know my son has it in him skank. Angela is nothing next to you and it's all thanks to you
00:55:56Sweetheart actually, it's thanks to Angela
00:56:02What
00:56:04Me to go back to your wife. Oh, no. No, no, he's not
00:56:08What are you doing? You have such a beautiful and great future ahead of you. It's my decision mom
00:56:15I'm the head of the house here
00:56:18I'm telling my dad fine. Go right ahead. He has enough problems himself if you're obedient
00:56:23I'll keep you around as a side piece, but if not, you can scram
00:56:27dad
00:56:29Jared is being mean to me. Teach him a lesson Kaylee be a good girl. Okay?
00:56:35Jared has the backing of some very powerful people now don't get on his bad side
00:56:40We can't afford to piss him off. So do as he says
00:56:44I
00:57:02Mean do I really want to be with mr. Minty mouth forever though, but that time action though
00:57:09Tongue is important in more than just one spot. We are in public. It's true. Oh
00:57:15Stomach ache again. I have to run to the bathroom. Devin should be here to pick you up soon
00:57:23Kevin's late not a good sign for a date
00:57:28This hotel restaurant has five Michelin stars
00:57:33It's her she's alone with no one to save her
00:57:39You whore you seduce my son so he could back with you
00:57:47Let me tell you I would never go back even if your entire family got down on their knees and begged me
00:57:56Hey, you guys can fight all you want you take this somewhere else
00:58:00Whoever gets rid of her for me gets all this
00:58:03She's the one starting shit because I have money and you don't you're just a stinky hippie peddler
00:58:09And my son just signed a $100 dollar contract
00:58:13He still got the contract
00:58:16Hmm must be Ellen's doing even if he does sign it. He doesn't look we need to pay the deposit up front
00:58:22Oh, he's just gonna bet you've never seen this much cash before
00:58:27That you've never seen this much cash before
00:58:30You take my charity and in my face as if it's your own
00:58:35My maid wouldn't even pick up such a pitiful
00:58:38$1,000 to take her away
00:58:41$2,000 to drag her away
00:58:45$5,000 to beat her
00:58:54You okay, are you hurt?
00:58:56You you just a few days ago you found yourself a boy toy right after getting divorced now, you have two more what a whore
00:59:05What a whore. Yeah, and Jared wanted to get back with her
00:59:09What if she has an STD? Oh
00:59:12Like sleeping with a married man wouldn't give you an STD
00:59:15Let's go. We'll explain later. Okay. I'm gonna go get some sleep. I'm gonna go to bed. I'm gonna go to bed
00:59:21I'm gonna go to bed. I'm gonna go to bed. I'm gonna go to bed. I'm gonna go to bed
00:59:25We'll expose her to Jared. Hang on
00:59:29What do you want?
00:59:39Oh god, he is a murderer what if he murders me not him definitely not him
00:59:47We're not afraid of you this isn't a war zone
00:59:51You'll be removed from being a five-star general if you hurt a civilian without adequate. I was just messing with them
00:59:58Was he though? We're not afraid of you
01:00:02Jared you have to avenge us. Look at this slut. She's found two more boy toys. She's cheating on you
01:00:08Don't get back with her. Oh, mr. Cooper. It's you. I apologize for this scene. I'm sorry
01:00:13Oh, mr. Cooper, it's you I apologize for this scene. What's a party crashes immediately so that you can go to his salvation banquet
01:00:21What did you say? You were gonna toss out? What did you say? You were gonna toss out the party crashes? Oh
01:00:29You have any idea who that is that's my wife
01:00:35That's right, no, you're playing shut up she's cheating on you
01:00:41No
01:00:42Your place you just decide peace if I still want you that is Eric. Have you gone mad?
01:00:48This is Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter. You slap her for this whore. Mom
01:00:53They really think there's something huh?
01:00:55Chosen heiress to a family whose wealth and status goes back to the Victorian age. She's richer even than Ellen Musk
01:01:02I only got the Maple Closet project. She gave it to me
01:01:06What you apologize right now I will kick you and your father to the curb
01:01:17I'm sorry
01:01:21This can't be I made you divorce
01:01:27Go home you're not suited to come with me to my celebration banquet
01:01:36I
01:01:38apologize on behalf of my mother
01:01:40Honey, I know you came here to my achievements. I promise no one will bother you anymore. I
01:01:47Didn't come here for you. I'm on a date
01:01:52Two men at the same time she really is a whore. Please forgive me. I really do love you
01:02:06Oh, Lady Lockhart is here
01:02:09Yeah, we already know you beat Ford's ass
01:02:13We're too old for that. They're here for my celebration banquet
01:02:17Please you gave me the contract so if anyone should go as my guest of honor, it should be you
01:02:22Oh, yes, please miss Lockhart join us. We'll all be one happy business family again
01:02:29How are you all doing here? Where were you?
01:02:32stomach issues
01:02:34Again, would you like my diagnosis? No?
01:02:39Let me make my Sarah, okay, I
01:02:43Would rather die than be with you again
01:02:46She's that they're not actually on the good term. I
01:02:50Can't lose face in front of my family
01:02:53I'm sorry, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry
01:02:57I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry
01:03:00I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I'm sorry
01:03:03I can't lose face in front of these pricks. Otherwise, they'll cut me off to Angela
01:03:06I know you're still mad, but please give me a chance. I'll prove it to you
01:03:11You want a chance?
01:03:12Angela no, you have three great guys here who all want to marry you don't take him back
01:03:19I'll give you two choices
01:03:22I'll give you two choices
01:03:26Me
01:03:27Where the cot you're kidding me. No, I'm not kidding you
01:03:33If you choose me, we can remarry this week, but you don't get the hundred billion dollar contract
01:03:40The choice is all yours
01:03:44Did you think so he either marries a royal heiress or gets a contract that takes his company to the moon either way benefits
01:03:51Why can't I have both? You really are a greedy bastard Angela. I saved you cool. Remember I deserve the contract
01:03:59Did you really?
01:04:04Look who's fashion relate now
01:04:07He didn't save her at the pool
01:04:10But what are you talking about? I I choose the contract. I knew it. You'll get what's coming to you
01:04:19With this contract my company's earning potential is limitless
01:04:24Angela Lockhart you humiliated me in front of everyone. I will get you one day
01:04:29Let me show you something
01:04:33You
01:04:41Saved me
01:04:47You saved me I'm sorry if his lies led to you in three years of your life
01:04:55But I promise you
01:04:57I'm gonna make it up to you with the rest of our lives. No. No, I wasn't lying
01:05:02I just couldn't can't remember exactly what happened that day
01:05:12Does that mean we both each saved her once
01:05:16What me?
01:05:19Dr. Wilson losing at saving people. No way you guys one of you do something life-threatening right now
01:05:26You're crazy
01:05:29Actually
01:05:30They've all been doing horrible shit behind your back
01:05:34What?
01:05:36Mr. Sterling had me investigate their company's dealings turns out they've been fudging the numbers on your shared accounts and contracts
01:05:43Put it simply
01:05:44They've been stealing. I
01:05:46Can't believe I didn't realize
01:05:49Miss Lockhart, I'm so sorry. I should have had third-party accountants check thoroughly. You know, it's not your fault
01:05:55They're just too slick like me to punish them. Oh god. No, not that again, please
01:06:02max
01:06:18The banks have pulled all of our funds all business ties have been severed
01:06:25No
01:06:28How did you do that, who are you and don't say spider-man
01:06:35I'll tell you
01:06:38I'll tell you who I am. I
01:06:43Am
01:06:45Crypto punk number two. What did he say? He was more bizarre than spider-man
01:06:51You're a crypto punk number two
01:06:53well
01:06:54I'm crypto punk number one. See you are number one or something the most expensive NFT collection in the world
01:07:02Forget Forbes's list
01:07:04It's all about young money now
01:07:06so
01:07:07How about our date?
01:07:13I'm not letting them one up to us by two
01:07:24I
01:07:33Still have the 100 billion dollar project. Yes
01:07:47What
01:07:54A contract and we'll have to pay for all financial repercussions. No
01:08:00Bankrupt
01:08:04You tricked me
01:08:11Allow me
01:08:14I'm sorry. I was late. My queen had to get some very important materials
01:08:21for our special date
01:08:23Cheers cheers
01:08:34This looks good
01:08:40Did you use this is I know your ex-in-law's never appreciated you
01:08:47You can have all the money and power in the world you still can't force a man to love you
01:08:53Couldn't even remember our anniversary
01:08:59Angela
01:09:01Your future with me
01:09:05It's gonna be different
01:09:23Oh
01:09:29Devon I can't believe this is what I've been missing out on these past few years just because of some silly mistake
01:09:37Angela
01:09:38I've known and loved you for three whole years
01:09:41actually
01:09:43I've also loved you years
01:09:45That's right. I fell in love with you three years ago, too
01:09:49How is all of this possible? I?
01:09:52Eat any of you until recently?
01:09:55well, actually, maybe Devon, but
01:09:59I've had a crush on you since college
01:10:02You're a motivation to go to business school
01:10:06Despite who you were you never judged me for being poor
01:10:12Are you trying to get hired at fortune 500 in a suit like that?
01:10:17All you do is babble on and on about internet money bitcoin shit like that
01:10:26Are you trying to steal my spot?
01:10:30I'll teach you a lesson
01:10:37Feisty I like her
01:10:48How is he it's a rare poison made from a mixture of dried roots found in Africa
01:10:54Osh to go so teeth can it be cured I actually think I know that poison it sounds really scary
01:11:00But it's cure can actually be found in any developed country
01:11:04household salt
01:11:12I like her
01:11:18There you go
01:11:23Shoot I'm late for some practice
01:11:30I
01:11:32like her
01:11:33We have been rivals ever since
01:11:36so that's how I
01:11:39We all met I bear member should I never let you go to swim practice that day
01:11:46Matthew Richards the guy
01:11:49Attacked you out of revenge. You wouldn't have known I did hear he dropped out became a loan shark though that makes you feel any better
01:11:55Yeah, I think that suits him a little better
01:11:58Angela your seven days is almost up now that you know they all loved and fought for you for three years
01:12:04Who will you pick?
01:12:06How
01:12:11Couldn't it be Angela Lockhart is an heiress
01:12:20We've come bankrupt
01:12:24Bankrupt the Vanderbilt's gone bankrupt
01:12:28Well, then get out of here
01:12:30I
01:12:40Have to be considered Angela is way better than this dimwit. You should get back with your wife. We're bankrupt
01:12:51Jared Cooper
01:12:54We are here to propose to no one is going to save you now
01:13:05What kind of an asshole throws his own mother to the dogs
01:13:11Who will you pick I
01:13:14I
01:13:20Brought you fried chicken right? Hey, no girls like sushi and caviar. Yeah, he's right. I did live in Atlanta for three months
01:13:28Sucking up last minute. At least I don't speak like an AI robot. Hey stop stop
01:13:36Welcome back to the bachelorette. I mean the three badasses who want me I mean
01:13:43Angela Lockhart
01:13:44You know what? I mean today our heiress bachelorette will choose which one of our three badasses. Will she marry?
01:13:53Will it be Shane the doctor?
01:13:57Cole the general
01:14:01Or Devin the CEO
01:14:03Uh
01:14:07Looks like our bachelorette may need to do a little more time to decide. Oh the suspense is killing me
01:14:14When she does she will take this eternal rose made from glass imported from Venice and give it to our way
01:14:22Angela
01:14:26Oh, I
01:14:30Need more time to think
01:14:34Uh
01:14:36While our bachelorette takes a little time to decide why don't we check in with the candidates let's check in with each of our candidates
01:14:45Let's start with Cole Cole
01:14:51There's not much to say
01:14:53Who wouldn't want a five-star general who has huge biceps a massive chest?
01:14:59Who would protect their wife?
01:15:04Okay, thank you, uh Shane
01:15:09Muscles money
01:15:12The only you so far, but you need a well-balanced man like me
01:15:16It has more than one way to keep a lady happy if you know what I mean
01:15:23I think we do and Devin that was quite disgusting. I
01:15:30I
01:15:32Just hope Angela's okay. I know she's going under a lot of stress right now a lot of choices to make
01:15:39She's my queen. I
01:15:41Just really hope she's okay
01:15:43Then one more thing what kind of a doctor?
01:15:46Brings fried chicken to a girl
01:15:49It's a good point back for her heart
01:15:53And then you what you know what they say about military men
01:15:58They beat their wives
01:16:04No
01:16:06Stand up
01:16:09Hey you guys
01:16:11Whoa break it up. Hey break it up
01:16:28I
01:16:38This is the hardest decision I've ever had to make in my entire life, who do I choose?
01:16:45Angela's marry me. We're not stealing her from me. Oh, yeah, I may be a doctor
01:16:50But like I said, I know and possess the deadliest poisons in the world
01:16:57What don't you have a guy code
01:17:00Flavor don't I won't let you take Angela away from me. I'll fight you then. Don't forget about me
01:17:06It's time to get to know each other. I'm not gonna let you take Angela away from me
01:17:11Don't forget about me it's time. I reveal my true identity
01:17:19These stupid profile cards don't make any sense. They do not they do not help who made these
01:17:42It's time I reveal my true identity
01:17:48I'm actually a part of the X-Men. I have the power of telekinesis
01:17:54Oh
01:18:09We may have to work together to take him down
01:18:12Oh
01:18:22This battle within our heads is the most intense I've ever experienced I
01:18:26May not be able to take them both down. It is time to team up
01:18:30hmm
01:18:31winterment or cool
01:18:37You know
01:18:39I've always really liked your hair. Really? I'm actually pretty self-conscious about it. So I appreciate that
01:18:49Cool I've always really liked the way you talk
01:18:58What do you got for me I always really like the way you chew gum. Yeah, it's fresh
01:19:09You're actually
01:19:16Angela's been kidnapped
01:19:18Angela's been kidnapped
01:19:20It was Jerry Cooper
01:19:22That fucker we have to find her what help
01:19:26Her dad installed a GPS tracking mechanism on her ring just in case. Well, let's go then
01:19:32My fiance my fiance
01:19:39Jared
01:19:46You destroyed me
01:19:49They took everything
01:19:53Nothing left
01:19:55It's not my fault you're too greedy
01:19:59Greedy have sex with my wife
01:20:03I'm not your wife anymore. Yeah, I know you wouldn't take me back now. Not unless I get you pregnant with my child
01:20:08This is illegal. You wouldn't want your child to be away from his father and be arrested
01:20:14You will take me back
01:20:33Begging me to fuck you soon
01:20:38Come here
01:20:43Too late, I drugged her she'll be doing it. Yeah. Have you forgotten who I am?
01:20:49It really does have everything in scope everything except for fruit flavored gum. We get it already. Just save my boss
01:21:03You're all good now, thank God
01:21:07But what do we do with that piece of shit what what are you gonna do to me?
01:21:12Hey, stop. No
01:21:15Enjoy your erectile dysfunction forever
01:21:23Why we didn't actually have that fight turns out he's the most dangerous of them all
01:21:28So
01:21:33Who did you pick sweetheart we've invited the most important figures of the world to your wedding the prince of Bhutan
01:21:40And remember we will kill ourselves if you don't choose
01:21:48Welcome back to the finale of the three badasses who want me we're down to air
01:21:54Literally the wedding day, but who's the groom?
01:22:10Welcome back to the finale of the three badasses who want me but who's the groom?
01:22:15Ah
01:22:19Seems our heiress still hasn't decided
01:22:22Any input from the parents? Maybe that will help sway our bachelorettes choice
01:22:28This is exciting. Huh? Who should my daughter pick?
01:22:33Let me think
01:22:36I'd like the doctor. He's cute
01:22:41But but the general looks like a strong fellow
01:22:45And we can't forget about Devin Sterling the one who's loved her the longest. Isn't that right Devin?
01:22:51Angela
01:22:57You are all three very fine gentlemen and
01:23:03I'm really grateful for all of your love
01:23:07but
01:23:08this was a really hard decision and I
01:23:12Decided to devise one last challenge
01:23:15and I
01:23:18Decided to do one last challenge
01:23:23I'm just kidding. I'm just as sick of this as you guys are
01:23:30Each of our candidates have saved our main character
01:23:33I mean bachelorette once they've all proven their undying love who gets to unlock Angela Lockhart's heart
01:23:42literally
01:23:45Could it be the sexy and protective general with a temper. Mr. Cole Eisenhower
01:23:56Or the fun wicked minded but kind of weird dr. Shane Wilson
01:24:06Last but not least could it be the richest man of them all the man Angela would have married a long time ago
01:24:13Mr. Devin Sterling
01:24:17Gentlemen
01:24:19It's been a pleasure getting to know you
01:24:22Made the best man win made the best man win
01:24:27Drumroll, please
01:24:29I
01:24:51Choose
01:25:00I need a powerful strong man. I really feel like you can protect me
01:25:07Who could resist those guns
01:25:11They just you in an NFD Ellen you like full-body
01:25:14Choco
01:25:29Shane it's you. I'm love sick for you. I like that minty flavor, don't you?
01:25:37It's that tongue action ladies and gents
01:25:44Oh
01:25:56It's always been you
01:26:06I'll always love you. Let's give it nine inches everybody
01:26:14Have you seen my murder weapon
01:26:44You