• 2 months ago
A minor league hockey player struggles with the massive ego of his team's new owner, a hockey legend who was once his ch | dG1fYnNuVjlMWG9yOWs
Transcript
00:00Open the door, you've got to see this.
00:04Jake, you're not going to believe this.
00:05Shut up.
00:06Calm down, man.
00:07This better be good.
00:08It is, trust me.
00:09I'm so happy and thrilled to own the team here in Hemel.
00:12Of course, it's exciting to be a GM and a head coach as well.
00:15Your childhood hero is going to be your coach.
00:17Mr. Szilagyi, Jake McKay.
00:19Jake, good to meet you.
00:20This feud with team...
00:2193 All-Star Game.
00:23JR put a mouse in his bag.
00:25For some reason, he looked at me.
00:27And ever since then, it's been Brad Hall against Team Usulami.
00:31Who bought this happy ending massage last week for you?
00:33You did.
00:34Who bought the trip to Cabo?
00:35What trip to Cabo?
00:36This one.
00:37Five-star hotel, all included.
00:38But I want you to remember one thing.
00:40Keep that mother...
00:41...holly out of this...
00:42...league.
00:43I'm Gary Bettman, Commissioner of the National Hockey League.
00:47Worth every penny I spent.
00:48You sure you're not a casting director?
00:49Go back to New York, Bettman.
00:51Boo!
00:52Mr. Bettman, I'm the Commissioner of the Old West Hockey League.
00:54I get booed wherever I go.
00:55An eight-inch bobblehead.
00:56Six feet shorter than my statue in St. Louis.
00:59You will never get the Barons.
01:01What is he, a ranch hand or a hockey player?
01:03Both.
01:04He works at Dukes during the off-season.
01:05Nobody gets rich in the owl.
01:07He didn't have Korea and Winnipeg the year he got 76 tucks.
01:10Yeah? But he had Ty Domi, didn't he?
01:12And no one would go near him.
01:13And if they did, Ty would beat the f*** out of him.
01:16I got those owners right here in the palm of my f***ing hand.
01:21I really want to learn more about hockey.
01:22And I was wondering if you'd mind spending a couple hours with me after work someday?
01:27I can't do this, Jake.
01:28You know how I get when I'm alone with a hot girl?
01:30I either freeze up or I can't stop talking or I just start sweating like a pig.
01:35Hi, honey. What are you doing?
01:37Um, watching porn.
01:39You are watching your highlights.
01:41Changing the name to what?
01:42Camel Flash.
01:43Mike the Finnish Flash?
01:44I get it.
01:45He's gonna put a big statue of himself outside an arena.
01:47He's gonna be a foot taller than Brad Hulls in St. Louis.
01:49One rum and coke.
01:51Boy, would I love to tap that a**.
01:53You and me both.
01:58No, I got a nice little rental.
02:00I know why you bought the f***ing Hawks.
02:01You wanted to hire yourself as coach and have everyone kissing your f***s.
02:04Give your best shot, you minor leaguer.

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