Wallace-Matteson-Zappa, 9/88
Transcript
00:00Just when you thought it was safe, it's back, the Gong Show, with celebrity judges George
00:20Wallace, Pam Madison, Dweezil Zappa, Joan Carbone, and the Gong Show guys.
00:28And now, ladies and gentlemen, the toast of the host to Don Blue!
00:41Welcome to the Gong Show. We never push our luck, but we push your luck.
00:45Our first act got the idea for his routine by watching The Night of the Iguana.
00:50You'll see what I mean. Here's Jeff Hewitt and his lizard.
00:59Well, I'm just living in Los Angeles and trying to make my name.
01:07And they say you need a gimmick if you're gonna find fortune and fame.
01:12Well, I thought of mine last night while I was lying in my bed.
01:17I think I could be famous with a lizard on my head.
01:21Oh, won't you please remember me with a lizard on my head?
01:26Think of me day and night, even when you're lying in bed.
01:31If you want to see a guy get famous, just consider what I've said.
01:35And won't you please remember me with a lizard on my head?
01:40Now, you might think it's ridiculous, but there may come a day
01:45when life sounds rich and famous when you hear Robin Leach say,
01:50We're gonna cancel all our other stories. We're gonna do this one instead
01:54about a guy who's living the good life with a lizard on his head.
01:59Well, I can see it now. Deals for movies and TV.
02:04A great big tutor, Matthew.
02:13Boy, I'm sorry that happened. Who did that?
02:16Am I okay? Oh, it's fine. Wonderful.
02:19What's the name of the lizard? Iggy.
02:22Iggy? Yes.
02:24This is pretty rough. He's got a hangnail that's killing me.
02:28You know, this gong thing didn't seem to bother Iggy at all, though.
02:31Well, I don't know. He's pretty ticked off.
02:33He's a little well-balanced, actually.
02:35Yeah, what can I say?
02:36Well, let's find out what happened here.
02:38First of all, it was Dweezil, I think, that threw the gong. Dweezil?
02:42It's nothing personal. I like lizards, and I just felt like throwing the thing at the gong.
02:47It just, every once in a while, he's gotta get off whatever way he can.
02:52We'll maybe see you again with another animal on your head someday, okay?
02:55Thank you. Thank you very much. Thank you for being here.
03:05You know, I thought we were gonna win a Specky with that, too.
03:08From the SPCA, you get this television award, and I thought we were gonna be up for it,
03:11but I guess not. Rappin' Rudy and his mother are here from Canada.
03:15Now, they had to overcome great obstacles to be here.
03:18They're here against the advice of his father and his grandparents,
03:22and two senators, and the entire population of Saskatchewan, Moosejaw, Saskatchewan.
03:28Here's Rappin' Rudy!
03:31Hey, Rappin' Rudy, how come that woman's standing on the corner like that?
03:36Well, Jimmy, it's like this.
03:41She's kinda like a business man. Body shop, body shop, she has an occupation.
03:47Say what? Say what?
03:49She's a salesperson, salesperson, in a sticky situation.
03:55Salesperson, salesperson, in a sticky situation.
04:00Body shop, body shop, she's so inviting, thinks she's so hot.
04:06She thinks she's got something no other girl's got.
04:09She's just a body shop, body shop, no need to stop.
04:13You know a body shop, body shop, a jack-in-the-box.
04:17Ha, ha, ha, body shop, body shop, drive on through.
04:22Body shop, body shop, a jack-in-the-box.
04:26Ha, ha, ha, body shop, body shop, drive on through.
04:30Body shop, that's what I wanna do.
04:40All right, that was great.
04:42Okay, so, uh, no waves today, huh?
04:45No waves.
04:46Had to come down here. You must be Mom, huh?
04:48Here, turn right around here so the people can see you. There you go.
04:51So, uh, Mom, are you proud of your boy, Rudy?
04:54Yes, very proud.
04:56Oh, you sound like you're from maybe somewhere. Where are you from?
04:58I've been born in Germany.
05:00Oh, really?
05:01Yes.
05:02And how long have you been here?
05:03Uh, more than 15 years.
05:06Well, very good. Welcome.
05:07We live in Canada for 10 years.
05:09Rudy is born in Toronto.
05:11No kidding.
05:12He is a Canadian.
05:13Okay, Rudy is a Canadian.
05:16See what comes over the border sometimes you just never know. I like this.
05:20Okay, here we go.
05:21We'll find out your scores here as we meet our celebrity panel.
05:24A very funny guy, comedian George Wallace.
05:27Welcome, George.
05:28Hey!
05:33Yeah.
05:34I like that band.
05:36How about a score here?
05:37Rapping Rudy.
05:38Yeah.
05:39I didn't like you.
05:41But I love your, I love your mother.
05:43How about a big nine?
05:46Moving down the panel, please welcome the many voices of Pam Madison.
05:53Ow, ow, ow, ow, ow, ow.
05:55Can we talk here?
05:56I like the mother, too.
05:57I like the thing in her hair.
05:58But I want the son.
06:00I gave him a five.
06:01Oh, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes, yes.
06:05Now, our next judge has a hit single, My Mother is a Space Cadet.
06:08Please welcome Dweezil Zappa.
06:11Is that a hit?
06:13Well, it's a smash.
06:15We'll get the facts right on the show.
06:17But I'm going to judge this act because it was fabulous.
06:21Unbelievable.
06:22Thank you so much.
06:23A ten.
06:24Wow!
06:25A ten!
06:28Dweezil, Dweezil, we just figured if we mention it, it'll be a hit now.
06:31Okay.
06:32Well, thanks.
06:33Here we go.
06:34Let's recap scores now.
06:35First of all, from George, you got a nine.
06:36Pam gives you a five.
06:38Then, Dweezil, a ten.
06:40So, the mother and son act, a grand total of 24.
06:43Very good.
06:44We'll see you later on.
06:54Well, now, when we come back, we'll have a chance to make an all-new Miranda decision,
06:59right here on the Gong Show.
07:07One love, get closer
07:11When you're closer, that's when closer comes
07:14Wider teeth and a fresh mouth
07:17One love, get closer
07:19In paste, tartar control and gel
07:22See ya.
07:23Whoa, whoa, whoa, did you get everything?
07:24Yep.
07:25Lime, I wanted lemon.
07:26Good enough.
07:27Good enough.
07:28Parmesan, I wanted Romano.
07:29Good enough.
07:30Whoa, whoa, what's this?
07:31I wanted ragu spaghetti sauce.
07:32This is not good enough.
07:35Highlight your life with your own shining light
07:41Highlight your hair with what's naturally there
07:47Halsa
07:49There and there, natural highlights.
07:51Halsa Highlights, yours with Halsa Swedish Botanical Shampoo.
07:55Marigold for blondes, ginger root for redheads, walnut leaves for brunettes.
07:59Highlight your life
08:01Bring out your own natural highlights with Halsa Shampoos and Conditioners.
08:04Halsa
08:05There and there.
08:07There's something about the South Channel 2 knows all about
08:11It's a down-home philosophy
08:14It says every second counts
08:16When the pressure starts to mount
08:18And the action gets heavier on the street
08:21In these fast-moving times
08:23We keep Georgia on your mind
08:25That's what it's all about
08:28So don't get caught nappin'
08:30Cause anything can happen
08:32In a moment, in a heartbeat
08:34Here's the sound
08:36Toyota's closing the doors on the 88s
08:39But the doors are open for bargain hunters
08:41To get big closeout savings
08:43And $500 rebates never offered before
08:46On Corolla Deluxe Sedans
08:48$500 back from the factory distributor on new Camrys
08:51$500 back on new trucks like this
08:53Or this
08:54Plus, when dealers reach objectives
08:56They can pass $1,500 incentives
08:58Right to you on all trucks
09:00$500 rebates
09:01$1,500 incentives
09:03Hurry, while there's still time to save
09:05At Toyota Dealers
09:13Now I know a lot of you were gonna dress up
09:15In shredded crepe paper
09:17And do this accordion act on the Gong Show
09:19But this next woman beat you to it
09:21Please welcome Martha Watson
09:26Martha Watson
09:56Martha Watson
09:57Martha Watson
09:58Martha Watson
09:59Martha Watson
10:00Martha Watson
10:01Martha Watson
10:02Martha Watson
10:03Martha Watson
10:04Martha Watson
10:05Martha Watson
10:06Martha Watson
10:07Martha Watson
10:08Martha Watson
10:09Martha Watson
10:10Martha Watson
10:11Martha Watson
10:12Martha Watson
10:13Martha Watson
10:14Martha Watson
10:15Martha Watson
10:16Martha Watson
10:17Martha Watson
10:18Martha Watson
10:19Martha Watson
10:20Martha Watson
10:21Martha Watson
10:22Martha Watson
10:23Martha Watson
10:25Boy, but you were smiling all the way
10:27I really thought you were gonna make it, you know
10:29Yeah, me too
10:31You looked a little nervous
10:32When you came out
10:33But you're okay now, aren't you?
10:34Yes, fine
10:35Okay, alright
10:36Here we go
10:37Are you married?
10:38Yes
10:39Does your husband know you're here?
10:40Yes
10:41Does he know you're doing this here?
10:43No comment
10:45No
10:46We'll see how he likes it
10:47What do you think, honey?
10:49Okay
10:50Now I think it was Pam
10:51That Gonged you
10:52Okay, now I think it was Pam that gonged you.
10:54Uh-huh.
10:55And now we're going to find out why, aren't we, Pam?
10:57She reminded me of Diana Ross, you know?
11:00She looked like she was in pain.
11:04So I had to stop her.
11:07And so I stopped you.
11:10Well, there it is.
11:11That's as good as anything.
11:14Thanks very much.
11:15Well, whoa.
11:17If you like this next singer,
11:19then you'll like both of these next singers
11:21because they are the identical twins
11:24of Elle and Elle Connection.
11:36Inseparable
11:43That's how we'll always be
11:47Inseparable
11:50Just you and me
11:52It's so wonderful
11:56To know you'll always be
11:59Around me
12:03Well, like a flower to a tree
12:07Like words to a mellow melody
12:10Oh, love, sweet, sweet love
12:16There's no way we can break up
12:20No words that can make us glow, I think
12:25We'll stay
12:30Inseparable
12:33That's how it is
12:36Inseparable
12:39For the rest of our years
12:42It's so wonderful
12:46To know you'll always be
12:51Around
13:00Hello, ladies.
13:01Hello, how are you?
13:02Very good.
13:04That was very, very nice indeed.
13:06Now, you're identical twins?
13:07Yes.
13:08Just a minute now.
13:09Let me just look quickly.
13:10I'd say this one over here is older.
13:11Are you older?
13:12You got it.
13:13Wow.
13:14It's just a wild guess.
13:15I'm amazed.
13:16Tell me this.
13:17Are you truly inseparable
13:18or backstage now do you hate each other?
13:21No, we're inseparable.
13:22Oh, you really are?
13:23We really love each other.
13:24That's different.
13:25Great.
13:28Boy, they look alike, don't they?
13:30George.
13:31And I love you, too.
13:33Uh-huh.
13:34You are wonderful.
13:36You shut up.
13:37I'm running this show.
13:40I give him a nine.
13:41Okay.
13:42That's a good score.
13:43That's a good score.
13:45Do you two work together also?
13:47No, we sing together.
13:48Okay, wait a minute.
13:49What sort of work do you do?
13:50I'm in public relations.
13:52And what do you do?
13:53I'm a teacher.
13:54Okay.
13:55Very nice.
13:56I said shut up.
13:57I'm running this show.
13:59George, I'm running the show.
14:01Okay, Pam.
14:03They have so much love.
14:07I just want to cry and everything.
14:10And I love you very much.
14:11I think you girls are great.
14:12I give you a nine, too.
14:13All right.
14:16Well, then, those scores are identical twins.
14:18That's so wonderful.
14:19Dweezil.
14:20Yeah, well, you know, I love a family act.
14:22And also, I know it's real hard to come on any show and sing,
14:25so I gave five to each of you.
14:27All right.
14:29Well, great scores.
14:31Here we go now to recap the scores.
14:33George said nine.
14:34Pam says nine.
14:36And Dweezil loved the act, gives you a ten.
14:38That's a grand total of 28.
14:41Very good, ladies.
14:42See you later.
14:44Oh, baby.
14:46Oh, baby.
14:49Oh, baby.
14:51Now, this next team is together for better or for worse.
14:54I mean, they both could have done better,
14:56but at least they couldn't have done worse.
14:58So, please welcome the Sensitive Brothers.
15:02Hello.
15:06We're the Sensitive Brothers.
15:16Lord, you know how my head aches
15:20When I'm drinking whiskey
15:23Lord knows that I've made mistakes
15:27Lord knows that I've made mistakes
15:30But I know he'll help me
15:34And I've got a migraine headache again
15:40And I just set fire to my bestest friend
15:46Baby, won't you come and stay with me
15:57Where do we go from here
16:00How about South Dakota
16:03Where the girls all drink malt liquor beer
16:10And they don't get migraine headaches in South Dakota
16:16Which is more than I could say for California
16:22Baby, won't you come and stay with me
16:26I'm getting lonely
16:28Baby, won't you come and stay with me
16:32Even though you're homely
16:34Baby, won't you come and stay with me
16:45Thank you very much.
16:51The Sensitive Brothers.
16:53Okay, come on out here, guys.
16:55Very nice.
16:58You two, they look very, very sensitive.
17:02Boy, I'm sure glad you got through this because
17:05I'm afraid that if this guy right here would have been gone
17:09You're very sensitive.
17:10Thank you very much.
17:11Yeah, he's very sensitive.
17:12Are you really brothers?
17:15Yes, we are.
17:16And what are you laughing about?
17:20Come on, are you really brothers?
17:21Yes.
17:22Okay.
17:23And what do you guys, are you going to do an act when you get older?
17:26What do you want to do when you grow up?
17:28Are you going to school now?
17:29Yeah, I'm going to school.
17:31And what are you studying?
17:33Black studies.
17:34Black studies.
17:36Okay.
17:37And George, you almost gonged him, huh?
17:40Okay, let's look over here and see.
17:43George?
17:44You know, you had yourself an eight, but you just went down to seven.
17:48George, wait a minute.
17:50George!
17:54Okay, okay.
17:56Okay, okay.
17:57Back to an eight.
18:02Pam Madison.
18:04He's so sensitive, and I don't want him to kill himself,
18:08so I gave him a ten.
18:09Okay, that's very good.
18:11Well, you've got some real fans here.
18:14Dweezil?
18:16Well, like I said, I like a family act,
18:18and it's hard to come on and sing on any show.
18:20I gave him a ten.
18:22And a big wave.
18:24Okay, now, as we recap these scores,
18:29we've got an eight from George.
18:31We've got a ten from Pam.
18:33We've got a ten from Dweezil.
18:35Grand total of 28.
18:36Very well done.
18:37There you go.
18:45Next on the gong show,
18:46we're going to see a lady who gets saluted every time that she enters the room,
18:50so don't go away.
18:51We'll be back.
18:56OPA, it's Atlanta's annual Greek Festival,
18:58September 22nd through the 25th.
19:00Great fun for the whole family
19:02at the Annunciation Greek Orthodox Cathedral of Atlanta,
19:05near Byercliff and Claremont.
19:06Easy to reach from everywhere.
19:08Greek music, Greek food and spirits,
19:10arts, crafts, and examples of Atlanta's rich Greek heritage.
19:14Don't miss it.
19:15Atlanta's Greek Festival, September 22nd through the 25th.
19:18For more information, call 633-5870.
19:27Hardy Chevrolet presents the Budweiser Four Nationals.
19:31♪♪
19:44Part of the Redman TNT Pulling Series,
19:46September 30th, October 1st and 2nd at the Omni.
19:49One child gets in free with each paid adult ticket Friday, September 30th.
19:53Tickets at the Omni at all seats locations.
19:56Good evening, folks.
19:57I'm Tom Park, speaking to you directly from Atlanta, Toyota,
20:00with some important information for you.
20:02It's the final closeout on every 88 at Atlanta, Toyota.
20:0589 models are coming in now.
20:07We have to make room for them,
20:08and we still have the largest selection of 88 model Toyota cars and trucks
20:12in all of North Georgia.
20:14Let me show you what we're doing.
20:15You buy any 8101 or 8102 model pickup truck,
20:195-speed or automatic,
20:20get $500 cash back right now this weekend at Atlanta, Toyota.
20:25That's direct to you from Toyota.
20:27You can use for your down payment or your vacation.
20:29Now, keep in mind, you couple that with the fact that we're selling
20:32every remaining 88 this weekend at only $99 over invoice.
20:36It's a tremendous time to save money.
20:38Invoice is what we pay.
20:39You add $99, that's what you pay.
20:41Now, here's Charlotte Earls and Mr. Toyota beside our Thunder Sport Truck.
20:45Here's what invoice pricing is all about.
20:47$74.88.
20:48Special wheels, tires, graphics and AM FM cassette stereo.
20:51All for $74.88.
20:52This weekend until midnight each night at Atlanta, Toyota.
20:56A member of our studio audience will receive
20:58Skyway's beautiful new luggage, Evolution.
21:01Combines fabric elegance with hard side strength
21:04and greater packing capacity from Skyway Luggage.
21:07♪♪
21:14Now, our next act is not only a dancing fool,
21:17but he's great for those of you on a salt-free diet.
21:20Here's Pepper.
21:21♪♪
21:31♪ I bought a picture frame today ♪
21:34♪ I put your picture in it right away ♪
21:37♪ I'm gonna put it on my dresser, yes sir ♪
21:40♪ So every time I look at you I can say ♪
21:42♪ Copper-colored gal of mine ♪
21:45♪ Love your culture so refined ♪
21:48♪ Will you always be my clingin' vine? ♪
21:50♪ Copper-colored gal of mine ♪
21:53♪ Come on, honey, name the day ♪
21:56♪ When bandies all the way ♪
21:59♪ With you we'll always be divine ♪
22:01♪ Copper-colored gal of mine, oh gee ♪
22:05♪ You're sweet as candy ♪
22:08♪ You're aces with me and I mean aces high ♪
22:11♪ Me, oh my, you know why ♪
22:14♪ Come on, honey, name the day ♪
22:17♪ When bandies all the way ♪
22:19♪ Life with you will always be divine ♪
22:22♪ Copper-colored gal of mine ♪
22:24♪
22:28♪ Copper-colored gal of mine ♪
22:33♪
22:35Very good.
22:40Very, very good, Pepper.
22:42Is Pepper your real name?
22:44No.
22:45Tony.
22:46No real name.
22:47Okay, well, this is a hot act.
22:48I think Pepper's a real good name for it.
22:50How about your occupation?
22:52What is it you do?
22:53I'm a professional DJ.
22:54Oh, really?
22:55So we'll see you in the clubs around L.A.?
22:57You know it.
22:58Oh, good, okay.
22:59Well, maybe one night we'll run into you.
23:00George hangs out at a lot of clubs.
23:01George, how did you score Pepper?
23:03Pepper, Pepper, Pepper.
23:07Good, good, good.
23:08I love those red socks, Pepper.
23:11You have on two red socks, Pepper.
23:15I'm going to give you a five for each sock.
23:20All right, a 10.
23:21Way to go, Pepper.
23:22Yes.
23:25Pam Madison.
23:26I thought he was really cute.
23:28He's really good, and I want you, Pepper.
23:31I mean...
23:32But here's a...
23:35Yes, I'm called Pepper.
23:36Get it?
23:37Yeah, that's original.
23:38I give you an eight.
23:41All right.
23:42Move on down the line, please, old Zappa.
23:44I thought it was a good show.
23:45I had to give him a lucky seven.
23:47A lucky seven.
23:48Here you go.
23:49All right, let's recap these.
23:50Don't leave me yet, Pepper.
23:51Stick around here as we get the good news.
23:53George with a 10.
23:54Pam gave you an eight.
23:56And then, Dweezil, a seven.
23:57That's a total of 25.
23:58That's very good, Pepper.
24:00We'll see you a little later.
24:01Yeah, okay.
24:02Oh, wow.
24:05And isn't it almost that magic minute now?
24:07We'll be back with our big winner right after this.
24:12They're coming from the legendary capital of America's movies right here to Georgia.
24:19The Hollywood Movie Makers.
24:21They're bringing big business to Georgia and the South.
24:23And might just be catapulting our fledgling movie industry into real competition with the big boys on the coast.
24:29Channel 2 reporter John Halston brings you an insider's look at some of the movies being made in our area.
24:34The lights, the hardware, the up-and-coming stars.
24:36Can the South reign as the new king of the movies?
24:38Find out in Hollywood South.
24:40Monday at 6, only on Channel 2's Action News.
24:44♪♪
24:48When is it right, when is it wrong to give money to beggars on the street?
24:51Do you think that you are truly helping another struggling soul?
24:55Or are you contributing to their delinquency?
24:57What is the kindest thing to do?
24:59Is it giving money?
25:00Giving food?
25:01Giving time?
25:02Giving up?
25:03Our city streets are jammed with the poor and hungry.
25:06What should be done about beggars?
25:08Your opinion on the next Oprah Winfrey Show.
25:10It's Oprah, tomorrow at 4, here on Channel 2.
25:13♪♪
25:15Good health is priceless.
25:17Today, more than ever, Americans are running, swimming, walking, cycling and eating their way to a clean bill of health.
25:24And it is for that reason Channel 2 and these sponsors have united to produce a series of messages entitled,
25:30To Your Health.
25:32This special opportunity will provide you, the health-conscious viewer, with valuable research and advice from the leaders in the health field.
25:39So watch for To Your Health, because your health is priceless, and we know it.
25:44Here's what real people say about Burlington Goat Factory.
25:47It's a great place, they have great prices, designer stuff, and at discount prices, that's why we come here.
25:53I find the prices much lower than I would find at a department store.
25:57So now that we're working girls, we come here to buy designer names for cheap prices.
26:02If everything is here you need, why go anywhere else? Everything is here.
26:04I have never seen as many coats under one roof than I've seen here.
26:09If you can't find a coat here, you're in trouble.
26:15It's closeout time.
26:17Toyota prices will never be this low again.
26:20And before the doors close on the 88's, we're open for real bargain hunters.
26:24Get home with $500 factory distributor rebates on new Corolla Deluxe sedans.
26:28$500 back on Camrys, $500 on this truck, $500 on this one.
26:32And when dealers reach objectives, they can pass along $1,500 incentives on all trucks.
26:37$500 rebates, $1,500 incentives.
26:40Only at Toyota dealers, while the doors are still open to big closeout savings.
26:45Toyota!
26:52All right, time for this magic moment now.
26:54We'd like to thank our judges for working on the show here.
26:57Where's our check?
26:58Dweezil has the check for $701.
27:00Thanks to George Wallace for being here today.
27:03Also, of course, to Pam Madison.
27:05Now, this is a tough one because it ended up to be a tie between the sensitive brothers
27:12and LL Connection.
27:16The judges have conferred the winner, the sensitive brothers.
27:21Yes!
27:23Come on in.
27:24Take your check.
27:26Take your trophy.
27:28Congratulations.
27:29Who says the family is dead?
27:31The brothers have won.
27:32We'll see you on the next Gong Show.
27:35If you have a weird and unusual act and you would like to audition for the Gong Show,
27:39please call Area Code 213-442-3575.
27:44Some of our departing contestants will receive an authentic reproduction from our past,
27:49a pine plant stand finished in weathered white from Broyhill's Millwood Creek Collection.
27:56The Episana, a 10-minute facial at home.
28:02No healthy skin should be without it.
28:05♪♪
28:10Channel 2's ACC football action is back Saturday at noon
28:13when the Virginia Cavaliers battle Steve Spurrier's rugged Duke Blue Devils.
28:17It's Virginia, fresh from their last, second upset of Georgia Tech
28:21against the biggest surprise in the ACC, a 3-and-0 Duke.
28:25Catch the action Saturday at noon here on WSB-TV Channel 2.
28:30♪♪
28:36♪♪