• 3 months ago

Category

😹
Fun
Transcript
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00:02:40Anybody got some tobacco wrappings?
00:02:48There ought to be some reading paper.
00:02:54Why, there be that Bush Hyden Cooper, the revenuer.
00:02:58What have all these lines been meanin', Cindy?
00:03:01Did hear a sayin' that this revenuer
00:03:05is gonna bust up all our stills,
00:03:08like it be a-doin' in other places.
00:03:10Well, I'm gonna stick this up here where Snuffy can see it.
00:03:17Well, I always did want a hogstick of revenuer.
00:03:25Snuffy sure ain't givin' them revenuers no comfort.
00:03:28If I collect the time he put a hornet's nest in Cooper's car,
00:03:34there was a sting in him that leaves as speckled as a guinea.
00:03:38Them revenuers are just a-pinin' to get their hands on Snuffy.
00:03:41You ain't needin' to be a-frettin'.
00:03:43They's just shadow huntin' when they's a-lookin' for Snuffy,
00:03:46cause he be up far on the point of eagle-eyein' him out.
00:03:51Mr. Carson, you're sure discombobulatin'.
00:03:56Comin' here a-choplickin' and a-takin' my dream away.
00:04:00Just when I was gonna shoot me that revenuer.
00:04:10Mr. Carson, you're sure discombobulatin'.
00:04:14Comin' here a-choplickin' and a-takin' my dream away.
00:04:19Three calls.
00:04:20Revenuers.
00:04:48Hey, Wilson.
00:04:49Wilson, you hit me right in the face with that.
00:04:51I'm sorry, Chief.
00:04:52You go first.
00:04:53All right.
00:04:54All right.
00:04:55Come on, now.
00:04:56Let's go.
00:04:59Hey, Wilson.
00:05:00Wilson.
00:05:01Wilson.
00:05:02Wilson.
00:05:03Wilson.
00:05:04Wilson.
00:05:05Wilson.
00:05:06Wilson.
00:05:07Wilson.
00:05:08Wilson.
00:05:09Wilson.
00:05:10Wilson.
00:05:11Wilson.
00:05:12Wilson.
00:05:13Wilson.
00:05:14Wilson.
00:05:15Wilson.
00:05:16Wilson.
00:05:17Hey, Wilson.
00:05:18Oh, Wilson, come here.
00:05:20You know, you're a very nice guy, and I like you very much,
00:05:23and you're very polite.
00:05:25But if you hit me in the back with another branch again today,
00:05:28I'm gonna break every bone in your body!
00:05:30Shh, quiet, quiet.
00:05:32They might hear us.
00:05:33Come on.
00:05:34Well, you've been tryin' to catch that little fella for months.
00:05:36What's the hurry now?
00:05:37Say, I gotta catch him today.
00:05:39Uncle Sam wants me on another job tomorrow.
00:05:43Coma, why do you hate that little mountaineer?
00:05:46Now, look.
00:05:47I don't hate him, but I should.
00:05:50He's been makin' a monkey outta me for months.
00:05:53Not only that, but he's ruined my record with the boss!
00:05:55Shh, quiet.
00:05:56Come on, they'll hear us.
00:06:00Snuffy, don't be a-throwin' lead till you know you can't miss.
00:06:09I hates to be a spy in store-bought clothes,
00:06:12but I gotta stop that revenue.
00:06:17They're shootin' cats!
00:06:19This is the last straw!
00:06:21Let them have it, boys!
00:06:46Shh, quiet.
00:07:17Hey!
00:07:18Hey, Wilson!
00:07:20Wilson!
00:07:21Hey!
00:07:23What happened, boss?
00:07:24Oh, they ain't fightin' fair.
00:07:26They're shootin' hardware.
00:07:27Get this off my neck.
00:07:28Get it off.
00:07:29Get it off.
00:07:30Oh.
00:07:31That is the only gun I ever seen
00:07:33that would kill him and burn him alive.
00:07:35Oh, come on.
00:07:36Come on.
00:07:37Come on.
00:07:38Come on.
00:07:39Come on.
00:07:40Come on.
00:07:41Come on.
00:07:42Come on.
00:07:43Come on.
00:07:44Come on.
00:07:45That is the only gun I ever seen
00:07:46that would kill him and bury him at the same time.
00:07:48When that thing echoes,
00:07:49you're sure gonna spoil a heap of timber.
00:07:54Oh!
00:07:55Hey!
00:07:59Oh, you fuckers!
00:08:03Oh, you little!
00:08:06You!
00:08:13Time's a-wastin'!
00:08:16Luigi!
00:08:20Table of nobles!
00:08:45Come on, woman.
00:08:46Quit stallin'.
00:08:47What a-railin' your poor bees and your breeches?
00:08:49Revenuers.
00:08:50Did they catch the steal?
00:08:52Oh, the bodacious digits weren't even in smelling range.
00:08:57Well, I guess we lost them.
00:08:58What do we do now?
00:09:02Oh, no, we haven't.
00:09:03We'll let Snuffy's dog take us to his cabin.
00:09:06Come on, boy.
00:09:07Come on.
00:09:08Come on.
00:09:09You be out-parkin' these new revenuers, too.
00:09:12Don't ever be forgettin'.
00:09:14They'll catch ya.
00:09:19Was there a travelin' peddler here while I be gone?
00:09:21No, there weren't.
00:09:26Somebody here be smokin' foreign tobaccy.
00:09:28Old Tom Elby's son will buy.
00:09:32Don Elby?
00:09:33Why he come back?
00:09:35He be a lovesickling for Cindy.
00:09:37Balls of fire.
00:09:38If old Saul ever catches Don Elby
00:09:41I'll make into his Cindy.
00:09:42I'll be a killin'.
00:09:44Why don't they be callin' this feud off?
00:09:46They're tired 1313.
00:09:49Yeah, not countin' the hogs.
00:09:51And porks goin' up.
00:10:04This must be Snuffy's cabin.
00:10:08I'm sorry, Mr. Carson, but I couldn't wait.
00:10:10You's too slow.
00:10:11Here.
00:10:12Here's a nice piece of meat for ya.
00:10:17Now easy.
00:10:18Ain't one thing that'll take a man and a dog's appetite away
00:10:22but a revenuer.
00:10:24You wait here.
00:10:35Where's Snuffy Smith?
00:10:36I wouldn't even know him.
00:10:40Well, we saw him today.
00:10:41Hey, you be seein' my Snuffy?
00:10:43Yeah.
00:10:44Are you well?
00:10:45How does he look?
00:10:46Awful.
00:10:47Ah, quit your stalling.
00:10:49Whose place is this?
00:10:50Us hillfolks.
00:10:51Always that's an extra place for people what gets lost.
00:10:54Take a seat in here, Bob.
00:10:57Oh.
00:10:59Come on, crawl outta there, Smith.
00:11:04Hey, come on out or I'll start shootin'.
00:11:07Oh, you will, huh?
00:11:11Ah!
00:11:13Oh, he bit me!
00:11:19He might have bit you, but you ain't tasty.
00:11:26Hey, give me the slip.
00:11:27There's a hole under the bed.
00:11:32Well, he's not out here.
00:11:36Oh, I just saw that corn shock move.
00:11:38I know the liquor up here is potent,
00:11:40but don't tell me that the corn itself is strong enough to walk.
00:11:48Don't tell me.
00:11:49I didn't see it move that time.
00:12:09Oh, boy.
00:12:17Gardenia.
00:12:30Down, Albie.
00:12:31I should be glad to see you.
00:12:34But you had not a bit to drink.
00:12:36But you had not a bit comin' here.
00:12:38I had to see you today
00:12:39because I have to be back at camp tonight.
00:12:41Gosh, honey, you're pretty as a redbird.
00:12:45Your plum's gross.
00:12:46She's too done.
00:12:48Are you a general?
00:12:50No, just a buck private, Cindy.
00:12:53What's in love with you?
00:12:55That's the way I'd be a-feelin' too.
00:12:57I wish your pa favored me.
00:13:00He won't be doin' that till the feudin's over.
00:13:03Hey, by the way, where is he?
00:13:05I'd be a-leavin' him a-guardin' the liquor still.
00:13:08One of them new revenuers has been pestin' around.
00:13:12You suppose he'll feel different about us
00:13:14now that I'm in the army?
00:13:16Boy, ain't he can what you'd be a-doin'?
00:13:18Ifn he be seein' an Albie,
00:13:20and you're an Albie, he'd be a-shootin'.
00:13:23Yeah, maybe.
00:13:25But he can't keep me from lovin' ya.
00:13:28That'd be nice word-makin'.
00:13:31After you done seen all them powdered city women,
00:13:36what'd you be a-havin' in the package?
00:13:39Boy, that's the range finder
00:13:41that I made in technical school.
00:13:44Oh, that here weird-lookin'.
00:13:47What the?
00:13:49With this, you can shoot a cannon
00:13:51as straight as you can a squirrel gun.
00:13:53Why you be a-takin' it?
00:13:55I'm takin' it to the army.
00:13:57And, honey, when they buy it, we'll get married.
00:14:00And I'll dress you up like a peach tree in bloom.
00:14:03Will ya?
00:14:05Maybe a long time.
00:14:07Oh, that ain't no matter.
00:14:10I'm still a-hankerin' for ya.
00:14:15Are ya?
00:14:17Are ya?
00:14:30Da-da-da-do
00:14:32Da-da-da-da-da-da-dee
00:14:35Da-da-da-do-do-do-do-do-do
00:14:40Poor me.
00:14:42Oh!
00:14:44Snuffy smell.
00:14:46Balls of fire.
00:14:48Since when you becomin' a revenuer?
00:14:50A revenuer? This is the army uniform.
00:14:52I thought you was another revenuer.
00:14:55They be up at my cabin.
00:14:57And I be comin' here to hide.
00:14:59Hey, uh...
00:15:01Who would the army be a-feudin'?
00:15:04Ain't been no Indians in these parts
00:15:06for more than 50 years.
00:15:08No, we're not fightin' Indians.
00:15:10I enlisted to help Uncle Sam.
00:15:12Mm-hmm.
00:15:14Mm.
00:15:15Gold buttons.
00:15:17I bet they be a-costin' ya a heap.
00:15:19Oh, no, the government gives them to ya.
00:15:21Mm.
00:15:22Ooh, khaki breeches, too.
00:15:24Yeah.
00:15:25Ain't they workin' ya hard?
00:15:28Ain't ya gettin' ya vittles?
00:15:30No, the government gives ya all you can eat,
00:15:32and they let ya sleep all the time.
00:15:35A place to bed?
00:15:37Gold vittles, gold buttons,
00:15:39khaki breeches,
00:15:42ain't ya gettin' ya smokin's?
00:15:44No, but they pay ya 30 a month,
00:15:46and you can buy them.
00:15:48Snuffy, I bet they be needin' ya up at the still.
00:15:51Nope.
00:15:52So they're standin' by.
00:15:55I hopes.
00:15:56Ha-ha!
00:15:57You be the first L.B.
00:15:59I ever see alive in Saul's cabin.
00:16:02Ha-ha-ha!
00:16:06You ain't livin' long.
00:16:08You ain't livin' long.
00:16:10Be a-lowerin' ya gun, Saul.
00:16:12Don a-comin' to take me to the army.
00:16:14You be goin' alone,
00:16:16because I'm a-sendin' him to the graveyard.
00:16:19Be a peg-makin', Don!
00:16:22Time's a-wastin'!
00:16:28Come on, get in, Snuffy.
00:16:29I'll drive ya home.
00:16:31No, I can't be goin' home.
00:16:33Revenue is a-guardin' my house.
00:16:38I wonder if Saul be a-hardin' me out.
00:16:45Nope.
00:16:46Still mad at me.
00:16:48Bah, jeepers!
00:16:50I'm a-joinin' the army with you.
00:17:00Company, dismissed.
00:17:09You little skunk.
00:17:11You bodacious idiot.
00:17:13I'll be a-bouncin' a raffle ball off your pumpkin head.
00:17:17Why can't I get in there?
00:17:19Now, look, I've been tellin' ya for a week.
00:17:21I can't let you in this army camp.
00:17:23Well, who do I have to see to get in there?
00:17:26Oh, go see the general.
00:17:28Well, I've been over there.
00:17:30Now, come on, get outta the way.
00:17:39Yes, yes, yes.
00:17:41General Rosewater speaking.
00:17:43Hiya, General.
00:17:45Take a seat.
00:17:46I'm a-hearin' you're needin' some good shootin' men for the army.
00:17:50I'm bein' the best squirrel shooter in the new United States.
00:17:54And me and old Tombstone will be a-fightin' you a war.
00:17:57And all I'm a-askin'
00:17:59is that you let me in.
00:18:01I'll be a-fightin' you a war.
00:18:03I'll be a-fightin' you a war.
00:18:05And all I'm a-askin'
00:18:07is a place to bed,
00:18:09vittles, gold buttons,
00:18:12$30 a month, and khaki breeches.
00:18:15How did you get in here?
00:18:17Corporal to the guard!
00:18:18Sergeant to the guard!
00:18:19Officer to the lead!
00:18:25Hey!
00:18:31The revenuer!
00:18:32Snuffy Smith, friend of yours.
00:18:34Friend of yours, eh, Sergeant?
00:18:35Well, not exactly.
00:18:36How'd you get in here?
00:18:37I...
00:18:38So you let him in!
00:18:39Well, get him outta here!
00:18:40Yes, sir!
00:18:41Huh?
00:18:42Uh, yes, sir.
00:18:43Come on.
00:18:48Stay out!
00:18:54Bounce this off your pumpkin head, then I'm goin' home!
00:19:05Bombs a-wasted!
00:19:07Are you hurt, General?
00:19:08Where's that little civilian?
00:19:09The one that went through my legs.
00:19:10He run down the road.
00:19:11Take a detail and find him and bring him back to me.
00:19:13Yes, sir.
00:19:14And don't come back without him!
00:19:35Pa!
00:19:37Be openin' this can for my soap makin'!
00:19:51Pa!
00:19:52If you'd taken your rifle gun down,
00:19:54you'd have got into that army!
00:19:58Pa!
00:20:01Pa!
00:20:03Be a-bustin' up my paddle for kindlin' wood!
00:20:06Sure I'll be.
00:20:08I'll be learnin' you to keep kindlin' cut.
00:20:23Pa, if it's gone!
00:20:31No!
00:20:44Pa!
00:20:49Pa!
00:20:51Pa!
00:20:52Balls of fur!
00:20:53What the tarnation you're doin'?
00:20:55I just be a soap-stern and it whoop!
00:20:58Well, get on with your soap makin' and leave me be.
00:21:06Pa!
00:21:07Some evil spirits will drink up my soft soap!
00:21:10Now, easy.
00:21:12You be givin' me more trouble than the revenuers.
00:21:16Hey, you be sure you're makin' it like you always be?
00:21:19Uh-huh.
00:21:29Well, I...
00:21:51You know that...
00:21:54I'm-a puttin' it in the pot...
00:21:56and it taint!
00:21:58I'm-a puttin' it in the water...
00:22:01and it tears!
00:22:05It be spirits you should be havin'!
00:22:07It ain't nothin' at all but hog fat and lye!
00:22:09What you done you ain't been doin' afore?
00:22:11I was stirrin' it with your great-great-grandpappy's wooden leg!
00:22:14Oh, well, made of coca-cola wood!
00:22:16What be?
00:22:17Disappearin' in the soap!
00:22:19Can I be gettin' another?
00:22:21How?
00:22:22Grandpappy got that when he were a pirate and with Captain Kidd.
00:22:26And I do be hearin' that the sea done swallowed up Coca-Cola Island...
00:22:31and ain't no more like it.
00:22:33Ain't he got a Sunday leg?
00:22:35Oh, they buried him in that one.
00:22:39Why?
00:22:41Thou is he!
00:22:44Thou is he!
00:22:51I'll be disappearin' the still!
00:22:55Paintin' like!
00:22:57Be a-savin' every drop of it!
00:23:08Here come the revenuers!
00:23:14Are you gettin' lost again, revenuer?
00:23:16Never mind that. Where's Snuffy?
00:23:18I wouldn't be knowin'.
00:23:20Take a look under the bed.
00:23:22Ah, my house is a bit upset.
00:23:24It'd be a boy's day.
00:23:37I'll be gettin' lost again, revenuer.
00:23:39Never mind that. Where's Snuffy?
00:23:41I wouldn't be knowin'.
00:23:43Hey, you're gonna shoot me, Mr. Army Man...
00:23:46because I got my burying place all picked out.
00:23:50Up there.
00:23:51I got orders to return you to the commanding general of the 10th Army Corps.
00:23:59Oh, thou is he, quit toddlin' up and makin' yourself a weakling.
00:24:13Come on, Mr. Carson.
00:24:14Wait a minute. You're not takin' that dog with you.
00:24:16Well, any place I go, that dog goes.
00:24:18This is one place you're going that that dog's not going.
00:24:22I'll be a-puttin' him in the house.
00:24:24Come on, Mr. Carson.
00:24:25And leave the door open.
00:24:26Fetch me a jug of drink and liquor.
00:24:29Get back here.
00:24:30Come here, Mr. Carson. Come here.
00:24:31And you'll be doin' a blackout.
00:24:32I air-covin' you with spirit juice.
00:24:43Good-bye, thou is he.
00:24:51Be rememberin' me as I am.
00:24:59Mr. Carson.
00:25:01Mr. Carson.
00:25:32So, you found him, eh?
00:25:34Good. Leave him with me.
00:25:36That's all, sergeant.
00:25:38That's all, sergeant.
00:25:40That's all, sergeant.
00:25:44Now, look here, general.
00:25:46If you're gonna bounce a rifle ball off my head, do it quick.
00:25:51Rifle ball?
00:25:53I want to talk to you. You're a hero.
00:25:55Sit down.
00:25:57A hero?
00:26:02For risking your life to save me from that runaway motorcycle.
00:26:05Then you're gonna be a-lettin' me live?
00:26:07Certainly.
00:26:08And I want to reward you for it.
00:26:10Is there something I can do to make you happy?
00:26:12Well, general, I...
00:26:14I likes, uh, khaki breeches,
00:26:17a place to bed,
00:26:19gold buttons,
00:26:21uh, good vittles,
00:26:23and, uh, $30 a month for my smokin's.
00:26:27You still want to get into the army, eh?
00:26:29Sure I understand it.
00:26:31General, would you be havin' a gurgle of corn drippings?
00:26:36Corn drippings?
00:26:38Yeah. It were comin' from old steel.
00:26:41Liquor? Never touched it in my life.
00:26:43It's not allowed around here.
00:26:45Well, would you be havin' a chore eatin' tobacco?
00:26:48No, thank you.
00:26:50Uh, Mr. Smith, would you mind takin' your feet off my desk?
00:26:54I'll be a-doin' it.
00:26:56But I thinks better with them over my head.
00:26:58Now, how about them khaki breeches?
00:27:01You're a little short for the army.
00:27:03Now, if there's something else that, uh...
00:27:05General, where I be comin' from,
00:27:08folks be a-keepin' their promises.
00:27:10Hmm. Hmm.
00:27:13Hmm.
00:27:19Hmm.
00:27:23I've got it!
00:27:25General!
00:27:26You're so sudden, you done scared me.
00:27:29Some regulations or the classification
00:27:31would permit you to wear a uniform.
00:27:33But the pay is only $21 a month.
00:27:35Do I still be gettin' my khaki breeches?
00:27:38$21 a month and khaki breeches.
00:27:41General, you got yourself a-a soldier.
00:27:44Hmm. Hmm.
00:27:50I be makin' a heap of other sounds, too.
00:27:53Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi! Oi!
00:27:56Eep! Eep! Eep! Eep! Eep! Eep!
00:27:59Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
00:28:02Just a moment.
00:28:04Yes, sir?
00:28:06I'm sendin' over Stubby Smith.
00:28:08Left him under special classification Z.
00:28:10B as in Burrocks?
00:28:12No, Z as in Zanuck.
00:28:14All right, Smith.
00:28:16Report to the quartermaster for your, uh... khaki breeches.
00:28:19General, with me helpin' ya,
00:28:21things are gonna be a-changin'.
00:28:23Two heads, all is four better than one.
00:28:25Hmm. Hmm. Yes, sir.
00:28:27Eep! Eep! Eep! Eep! Eep!
00:28:29Eep! Eep! Eep! Eep! Eep! Eep!
00:28:31Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah! Ah!
00:28:33Eep! Eep! Eep! Eep! Eep!
00:28:43Would you be a-readin' where I to go?
00:28:46Hey, ya thief!
00:28:48A corn squeezer.
00:28:50How'd you get in the army?
00:28:52I'll be a friend of the general.
00:28:54Give me that corn.
00:28:56Be hurryin'. The general might be needin' me.
00:28:58A yard bird, huh? You're not workin' for the general.
00:29:00You're workin' for me. But the general...
00:29:02Never mind about the general. I'm givin' orders around here.
00:29:04I'm running this place. Nobody can tell me anything.
00:29:06Attention!
00:29:08Suck in your stomach! Throw out your chest!
00:29:10Put your heels together, son of a...
00:29:12That's the way to be a soldier.
00:29:14Eep! Just a minute.
00:29:16Just a minute.
00:29:18You better sign to my company.
00:29:20From now on, you take orders from Sergeant Cooper.
00:29:22Do you understand?
00:29:24Oh, Zafar.
00:29:26Takin' orders from a revenuer.
00:29:28Now go find yourself a cot and report to the company kitchen.
00:29:30Why, Pete?
00:29:32Just follow your nose across the street.
00:29:36Eep! Eep! Eep!
00:29:38Be comin', Mr. Carson.
00:29:40Eep!
00:29:42Oh, did I step on your paw?
00:29:45Come on, fuzzy tail.
00:30:16Hey, snuffy.
00:30:18I thought you were still on kitchen police.
00:30:20I do be.
00:30:22But I'm beddin' up for a spell before I be mess-makin'.
00:30:24Still manicurin' those potatoes?
00:30:26I've been doin' that for a flock of days.
00:30:28But I ain't doin' a woman's work no more.
00:30:30You better not let Cooper catch you here.
00:30:32Cooper?
00:30:34That bodacious, edged-air, a-lunkhead.
00:30:36Hey, what are you doin' here?
00:30:38I be arrest takin'.
00:30:40Now, Rookyardburn-Schmidt, I've tried to be nice to you.
00:30:42I've tried to cooperate with you.
00:30:44But if I catch you arrest takin' again,
00:30:46I'm gonna throw you in the guardhouse!
00:30:50Be a-comin', Mr. Carson.
00:30:57My mother told me there'd be days like this.
00:31:02Looks like a rangefinder.
00:31:04Yeah, it's an improved rangefinder.
00:31:06One I perfected in college.
00:31:08What's different about it?
00:31:10Well, it's automatic.
00:31:12You put two prisms on a given point,
00:31:14and by turning the adjusting screws
00:31:16until the images are superimposed,
00:31:18you get an automatic reading in yards on the scale
00:31:20without any mathematical figuring.
00:31:22Hmm, that makes sense.
00:31:24You done anything with it?
00:31:26Can't even get anyone to look at it.
00:31:30Well, if it's as good as you say it is,
00:31:32I'll take it to the general for you.
00:31:34Do you think he'll be interested?
00:31:36He's interested in anything that'll help him
00:31:38win those maneuvers from General Hopkins.
00:31:40He's the commander of the Blue Army.
00:31:42He's an old campaigner.
00:31:44All our generals fought all these battles
00:31:46from a swivel chair with blue prisms.
00:31:48Well, if accurate artillery fire'll help him win,
00:31:50this rangefinder'll do it.
00:31:52You know, this is his first chance
00:31:54to prove his theories with real soldiers
00:31:56and actual maneuvers.
00:31:58Say, if it does work, do you think he'll submit it to Washington?
00:32:01Submit it? Well, he'd take it there himself.
00:32:03Say, if the White Army wins
00:32:05and the general can submit a proven rangefinder,
00:32:07boy, he'll retire happy.
00:32:09Well, that's a good approach. Focused it on an objective.
00:32:21Did you pick out a target?
00:32:27I certainly did.
00:32:31Why don't we see the general?
00:32:36Look, soldier, these hammocks are reserved for officers.
00:32:38I ain't being an officer. I'm a yard bird.
00:32:41Get going.
00:32:43Oh, swallow.
00:32:53Why, now that'll teach him a lesson. That'll...
00:32:56Oh, I'm sorry, sir.
00:32:58What's the meaning of this, Sergeant Cooper?
00:33:00Oh, I didn't mean it, sir. I'm sorry.
00:33:02That's no excuse.
00:33:04Report to my quarters at 3 o'clock.
00:33:07Oh...
00:33:16Can I be of help in your revenue?
00:33:27Rangefinder is correct in theory.
00:33:30Needs an actual field test to prove it.
00:33:32Well, why don't you try it at maneuver, sir?
00:33:34That's a good suggestion.
00:33:36Maybe just what I need to defeat General Hopkins.
00:33:38The old fox.
00:33:40You take charge of it, Sergeant. Watch it carefully.
00:33:43I'll call for it later.
00:33:45That'll be all.
00:33:47Very good, sir. Thank you, sir.
00:33:49Another thing, Sergeant.
00:33:53I wish to compliment you on the high morale of your company.
00:33:56Men from all the other outfits are trying to be transferred to yours.
00:33:59To what do you attribute that?
00:34:01Well, General, my theory has always been
00:34:03that an army travels on its stomach.
00:34:05And I personally see to it
00:34:07that my kitchen crew makes them happy.
00:34:09Very interesting. Let's go down and inspect your kitchen.
00:34:12Now?
00:34:13Certainly now.
00:34:14Oh, but, uh...
00:34:15No buts. Come, Sergeant.
00:34:17Oh, General! General!
00:34:25When Uncle Sam sent out the call for soldier boys
00:34:29Especially to defend our country
00:34:31With a ridge to tee
00:34:33Seems their chance to be in the hills of Tennessee
00:34:36A loyal lad who's called a name with Smith
00:34:39Since Snuffy Smith joined up, he's now a yard bird
00:34:43A little guy, but, my, he's such a hard bird
00:34:46Don't ever get yourself mixed up with Snuffy in a tiff
00:34:49Or you may find you're being flung
00:34:51Bodaciously off on the cliff
00:34:53If you should see a pretty face with naught behind it
00:34:56She's wasting time with Snuffy, so I heard
00:34:59Now, 30 bucks is riches when you're wearing khaki britches
00:35:03Hooray, hooray for Snuffy Smith, the yard bird
00:35:06Since Snuffy Smith joined up, he's now a yard bird
00:35:09And Ball's a fire cousin, he's a card bird
00:35:13The General and the Sergeant and the other guys with braids
00:35:16Are apt to have a rifle ball bounce off on their pumpkin heads
00:35:19Even a fireman's eyes bug out like trumped-on tug frogs
00:35:23The shiftless gonks' emotions Snuffy's stirred
00:35:26He ain't one of our flunkies, he's the captain of our donkeys
00:35:30Hooray, hooray for Snuffy Smith, the yard bird
00:35:33Since Snuffy Smith joined up, he's now a yard bird
00:35:36When evening rolls around, he's sure a tard bird
00:35:40You'd think he'd hit the hay and rest, but he's in town because
00:35:43He's seen a gal with pretty eyeballs and such rosy jaws
00:35:46Whether you hiked the door when Brains was passed out
00:35:49No, sir, he signs the finest ex, but mums the word
00:35:53I swow, he will be faded, don't be discombobulated
00:35:57Hooray, hooray for Snuffy Smith, the yard bird
00:36:17What is this?
00:36:18It's a still, General
00:36:20I'm just cooking up another batch of corn drippings
00:36:23Another batch?
00:36:24Yeah, they'd be drinking it faster than I can make it
00:36:27So this is what goes on in your company, huh?
00:36:29Well, I didn't know
00:36:30It's your business to know
00:36:31Yes, sir
00:36:32I put yard bird on your charge
00:36:33Yes, sir
00:36:34Take him out and make a soldier of him
00:36:35Yes, sir
00:36:36Oh, get out of here
00:36:38Get out of here
00:36:40The boy's gonna be powerful and sorry without their liquor
00:36:44Get out of here before I break your neck
00:36:47Give me that
00:36:49Get out of here
00:37:05Think I'll pass for a soldier?
00:37:07I don't know, that salute's pretty phony
00:37:09I'll get by
00:37:10Well, you'd better
00:37:11If you're caught impersonating a soldier 20 years
00:37:14Look, it's worth the risk if we got that range finder
00:37:17Well, I talked to the hillbilly and I talked to Cooper
00:37:20Your shorts in Cooper's office?
00:37:22Least got it, where else could it be?
00:37:23I'll get it
00:37:24See you when I get back
00:37:25Keep your eye on those civvies
00:37:27Okay
00:37:28Undoubtedly, gentlemen
00:37:30You understand how much these maneuvers mean to me
00:37:33As to when and where we hold them is up to Washington
00:37:36Whether we win will depend a lot on the type of country we operate in
00:37:40Upon what do you base your theory?
00:37:41The Blue Army has twice as many tanks as we have
00:37:44Yes, but we offset that with artillery
00:37:46And incidentally, one of the men has perfected a range finder
00:37:58Which looks like a great improvement over the present one
00:38:00Well, how does it differ?
00:38:02It has an automatic range calculator
00:38:04I'd certainly like to see that
00:38:06I knew you would
00:38:07I've sent for it
00:38:16Thank you
00:38:47With a tank moving at 35 miles an hour
00:38:49You can see how important automatic range calculation would be
00:38:54Yes?
00:38:55Sergeant Cooper reporting with a range finder, sir
00:38:57Send him in
00:39:01Put it right over there, Sergeant
00:39:08Gentlemen, the new General Rosewater range finder
00:39:12When you have this, you practically have the range
00:39:15Oh, it was here the last time I saw it
00:39:21What does this mean?
00:39:22Oh, I can't help it
00:39:24Sergeant, unless you have that range finder's maneuvers
00:39:27You'll be court-martialed for negligence, insubordination
00:39:32And conduct unbecoming a soldier
00:39:35Is that all, sir?
00:39:36Yes, and sabotage
00:39:37Pack your stuff and get out of here
00:39:39Yes, sir, I'm going
00:39:40I'm sorry, sir
00:39:44Yes, sir
00:40:01Cancel all leads and close the gate
00:40:04I'm sorry, gentlemen
00:40:05I'm sure they'll locate the range finder
00:40:10Now as to the maneuvers
00:40:11I don't know what the strategy board will decide
00:40:13But I'm in favor of holding the maneuvers
00:40:15In the Ozark Mountains
00:40:16The water is pure, the weather is ideal
00:40:19And it's rough country
00:40:20Water, mountains, rough country
00:40:22That air sounding a heap like hootin' holler
00:40:24And again I say
00:40:26Now just a minute, General
00:40:29If you are looking for rough country
00:40:32And fitting weather
00:40:34The Great Smoky's be it
00:40:36What's the meaning of this, Yardbird Smith?
00:40:38Now don't be a-stopping me
00:40:40That am a home place
00:40:42I know every bend and crook in that river
00:40:45And every hollow what's got a still in it
00:40:48Yardbird Smith, attention
00:40:50Don't be so bossy
00:40:52You're like my grandpappy
00:40:54All the time of giving words
00:40:56Snobby, you've exhausted my patience
00:40:59I've done everything possible
00:41:00To make a soldier out of you
00:41:02But you'll never make it
00:41:04I'm a-coming down here
00:41:05And you're sending me home
00:41:07You're sending men up to forging me back
00:41:10You put me in the kitchen
00:41:11And then you chuck me out
00:41:13You put me in khaki breeches
00:41:15For a-saving your life
00:41:18Be this a nice way to treat a hero
00:41:25You know where I'm coming from
00:41:26A man an old by his word
00:41:28Because they can't write
00:41:30But I'm forgiving you everything
00:41:32I'm still your friend
00:41:34And if you ever be a need me
00:41:35Just be sending me
00:41:36Three calls to the whippoorwill
00:41:46Where do you think you're going?
00:41:48Going uptown
00:41:49That's what you think
00:41:51All leaves are cancelled
00:41:57Time's a waste
00:41:59What are we waiting for?
00:42:01Let's make haste
00:42:02And don't get this soldier sad
00:42:04I'll get this soldier sore
00:42:05I'll bounce a rifle ball
00:42:07Off every punk and hated critter
00:42:09Got me mad I'm getting mad
00:42:11Give me my gun my jogger liquor
00:42:13Time's a waste
00:42:14Hear the bugle call
00:42:16Let's make haste
00:42:18And get spark plug from his stall
00:42:20Cause if we hitch him to Louise
00:42:22We can lick the varmints easy
00:42:24Time's a waste
00:42:25And what are we waiting for?
00:42:28Let's go over to B Company
00:42:35We ain't appreciated round here
00:42:38I done been working like killing snakes
00:42:41And a general ain't our friend no more
00:42:44That rain barrel Cooper
00:42:46All is a boss in a body
00:42:48All right Mr. Carson
00:42:51Tell me what you got
00:42:53I got a gun
00:42:55I got a gun
00:42:57I got a gun
00:42:59I got a gun
00:43:01I got a gun
00:43:03Catch
00:43:12You know twenty one dollars
00:43:14And khaki breeches are all right
00:43:16But I'm a hankering to look into
00:43:18Your big brown eyeballs again partner
00:43:22Yes sir
00:43:30Trying to make friends with Mr. Carson?
00:43:33Who's Mr. Carson?
00:43:35Yeah my dog
00:43:37Yeah right here
00:43:41Mr. Carson
00:43:42Be a speaky to him
00:43:47Mr. Carson jump up on him
00:43:49Mr. Carson jump up on him
00:44:01Now look if you think you can kid me
00:44:15Us are going back home to Louise
00:44:18Mr. Carson
00:44:22Hello Shorty
00:44:23Hello
00:44:25Going some place?
00:44:26I'll be a going home
00:44:27Where do you live?
00:44:28I live in Hooten Holler in the Great Smoky Mountains
00:44:31They won't let you out
00:44:32The gates are locked
00:44:34I've been a getting away from revenuers all my life
00:44:37Ain't no soldier what can stop me now
00:44:40How you gonna do it?
00:44:42That'll be in my business
00:44:44Take me with you will ya?
00:44:45No I ain't a hankering to help no soldier
00:44:48Traveling there like hunting
00:44:51You'll be better off alone
00:44:56By jeepers I near forgot my jug
00:44:59Where is it?
00:45:00That'll be none of your business
00:45:03All right Shorty I'll roll your pack for you
00:45:16Hey you sure my tacky breeches are in there soldier?
00:45:19They sure are
00:45:20Say how you gonna get to Hooten Holler?
00:45:23I'm a walking down till I come to the end of the road
00:45:26I'm a turning into a wagon road
00:45:28And I'm just keeping walking till I gets there
00:45:30Are you sure you're going?
00:45:32I'm going as far away from this army as I can get
00:45:36And when I gets there I'm a staying
00:45:46Listen now and get this straight
00:45:48I can't get out
00:45:50But I put the range finder in Snuffy Smith's pack
00:45:54He's walking down the main road leading to Hooten Holler
00:45:58Hooten Holler
00:46:01Pick him up in the car
00:46:03And get that pack
00:46:15Do you mean to tell me that you can't locate that range finder?
00:46:18Yes sir I've turned the place inside out sir
00:46:21What else can happen?
00:46:22I've got the games for the Ozarks
00:46:24And the war department puts them in the Great Smokies
00:46:26And you lost the range finder
00:46:28Yes sir
00:46:29It's a fine finish for me
00:46:31Yes sir
00:46:35Yardbird Smith knows that country
00:46:37Send him to me
00:46:38You send him home sir
00:46:40It's the last straw
00:46:41You don't need Yardbird Smith
00:46:43I was a revenue officer in that country
00:46:46Really?
00:46:47I've chased Yardbird Smith all through those mountains
00:46:50Did you ever catch him?
00:46:51No sir
00:46:54I still want Yardbird Smith
00:46:56You want me to get him?
00:46:57Yes sir
00:46:58That'll be all sir
00:47:14Hiya soldier
00:47:16Howdy miss
00:47:18Want a ride?
00:47:19Well I ain't be caring if I do
00:47:22Dead end
00:47:23Yep
00:47:32Oh boy
00:47:34Oh
00:47:36Oh boy
00:47:38Oh boy
00:47:40Oh boy
00:47:43Aren't you going to take that pack off?
00:47:45No
00:47:49You'd be much more comfortable without it
00:47:51It air just like leaning my back up against a tree
00:47:55Oh come on beautiful take that pack off
00:47:58No
00:48:02Don't
00:48:04Please don't
00:48:06Don't miss it
00:48:13Don't
00:48:15Please don't
00:48:17Don't missy
00:48:19Help me Mr. Carson
00:48:24Bite her
00:48:28Something bit me
00:48:33Come back here
00:48:42Come on
00:48:49He er done quit the army like quit work in the field?
00:48:53No just like crawling out of the jail house
00:48:56How come?
00:48:58Well they got some robbers there what the army calls filthconnoisseurs
00:49:01And they done locked the gates for to catch him
00:49:04Why don't you be hunting and a shooting him?
00:49:07They be looking like ordinary folks
00:49:10even be snuff-dippin' with one of the vomits and not be a-knowin' it.
00:49:18Mr. Carson, it appears to me like you've been ghostin' around wrong enough.
00:49:28Appears like Mr. Carson doesn't take on a little weight.
00:49:43Better get tombstone loaded.
00:49:44Here come the biggest hawks ever did see.
00:49:45I'll open the henhouse door and let the chickens in.
00:49:50Oh, them ain't hawks.
00:49:52Them be Army flyin' machines.
00:49:53Here come the revenuers.
00:49:54Thicker than blackbirds in the spring.
00:49:55Oh, you're not be knowin', woman.
00:50:06Them's not revenuers.
00:50:07Them's United States soldiers.
00:50:09What are they doin' here?
00:50:11They's maneuverin'.
00:50:12What?
00:50:13Now, don't ask me what that be.
00:50:19This is a very strategic spot.
00:50:21Position, position.
00:50:22Directly below now, Balbo.
00:50:23Company A, Captain Robinson commanding, sir.
00:50:26No range finder.
00:50:27Stupid sergeant.
00:50:28Smokies instead of the Ozarks.
00:50:30No yard bird.
00:50:33Lieutenant, can you whip a will?
00:50:36Can I whip a what, sir?
00:50:38Oh, you know, uh...
00:50:40That's it, that's it, that's it, that's it.
00:50:47Lieutenant.
00:50:48You go all through these hills and keep repeating that call
00:50:52as loud as you can till further orders.
00:50:55Have Captain Robinson report to me and assemble my staff.
00:50:57Yes, sir.
00:50:58That be the general.
00:50:59And he be a-needin' me.
00:51:00It's yard bird Schmidt.
00:51:14I'm a-seein' you took my advice.
00:51:27Yours in the war colleges.
00:51:29Oh, my, glad to see you.
00:51:30Oh, who we be a-fightin' in this war?
00:51:31The Blue Army.
00:51:32By the way, you haven't got your white armband on.
00:51:33Huh?
00:51:34I thought you done been hit by a rifle ball.
00:51:35All our men are wearing white armbands.
00:51:36We're defending this country.
00:51:37The Blue Army's trying to capture it from us.
00:51:38Oh, I'll be a-bouncin' a rifle ball off their pumpkin head.
00:51:39Why, that Blue Army be.
00:51:40Just a minute, yard bird.
00:51:41You can't use that gun.
00:51:42We're not shooting real bullets.
00:51:43Well, if I can't be a ledge-bitten, I ain't a-fightin'.
00:51:44Come, come, Snuffy.
00:51:45I'm counting on you to be my chief.
00:51:46I'm counting on you to be my chief.
00:51:47Well, I'll be hidin' old Tombstone under the bay.
00:52:01Officer Captain Robinson.
00:52:11The umpires declared all the officers of company A out of action.
00:52:15I am the company commander.
00:52:16You're the company commander?
00:52:17Yes, sir.
00:52:18That's right.
00:52:18All of them are!
00:52:20Yardbird.
00:52:23I've appointed Yardbird Smith my chief scout.
00:52:25He knows this country better than anybody else.
00:52:27You take your orders from him.
00:52:29Wait here.
00:52:30I have some special instructions for you.
00:52:33Now, lad, you understand the rules.
00:52:36Any object hit with flour is out of action.
00:52:39All decisions made by the umpire are final.
00:52:42If you're hit with flour, you're officially dead.
00:52:45And when you're dead, you're dead!
00:52:51Audacious idgits!
00:52:53General Rosewater, killed in action at 850.
00:52:57I know, and now here's the...
00:52:58Uh-huh!
00:53:02What were those special instructions?
00:53:04Look, I'm dead and I can't say a thing.
00:53:07If I were alive, I'd say one thing.
00:53:09If the White Army could hold the top of that hill, they'd win the maneuvers.
00:53:11You want us to be going up low?
00:53:13I can't answer that. I'm dead.
00:53:15Yeah, that's what he means.
00:53:16Well, if you're dead, why ain't you laying down?
00:53:19Oh, look, when you're hit with flour, you're dead.
00:53:22The general was hit with flour and he's dead and he can't do a thing.
00:53:25He can't?
00:53:25No.
00:53:28Oh, wait a minute, he's not that dead.
00:53:30Put it back.
00:53:34Come on, rain barrel, time's a-wasting.
00:53:38Did you forget something?
00:53:40You're dead.
00:53:43Don't be a letter writing that his invention was stolen.
00:53:47Who'd be a-taking it?
00:53:48A barman's what'd have been called a... a fifth columnist.
00:53:52Jump on jaybirds.
00:53:54That'd be what snuffy be a-talking about.
00:54:04What's the matter now?
00:54:05I near did be forgetting.
00:54:07I can't take you up on the nob.
00:54:08Why not?
00:54:09Oh, you're still a revenuer inside.
00:54:11Oh, but things are different now.
00:54:13I'm in the army.
00:54:14If I be taking you up, you'd be no one away.
00:54:16You'd come back and make trouble for my friends.
00:54:18You want the general to win, don't you?
00:54:20Sure, he's my friend.
00:54:21Well, a general can't win unless he gets to the top of that hill.
00:54:25Oh, I was thinking of Saul and the boys.
00:54:28Look, I'll make you a proposition.
00:54:30Take me to the top of that hill.
00:54:31I'll let all your friends go free, providing you break the still.
00:54:36All right, but I'll be doing it for the general.
00:54:42Hey, you fellows over there!
00:54:53That was close.
00:54:54Ain't you been a-telling me all the time them was wax rifle balls they'd been a-using?
00:54:58What's your fear of?
00:55:00Say, if those were wax bullets, the bees must have been eating concrete.
00:55:07That ought to be Saul and the boys a-shooting at us.
00:55:10They'd think we're revenuers.
00:55:12And they're using real bullets, too.
00:55:14Yeah.
00:55:15They'd think us revenuers.
00:55:17They not knowing about the maneuvers.
00:55:19Hey, now, look.
00:55:20You're being a friend of the general who said you could get us up there.
00:55:23Now, go on. Get us up there.
00:55:31Ain't nobody but can get up there a-wearing khaki breeches.
00:55:35Well, come here.
00:55:36Let's hop it over.
00:55:41Tell your men the Blue Army's objective is to capture Nauvailable before the White Army occupies it.
00:55:51Spread out, men.
00:55:52Somebody's using real bullets.
00:55:57Those are fiery, shipless gunks.
00:55:59Can't you see it's me?
00:56:00What do you mean, bringing them revenuers up here?
00:56:03Them ain't revenuers. Them's United States soldiers.
00:56:06The soldiers be a-shooting at the revenuers with the blue rags on their arms.
00:56:11You'll be a-meaning the blue rags is revenuers?
00:56:14Yeah, and we's a-trying to keep them away from this still.
00:56:19You's a mess of them blue rags.
00:56:21You want my friends to help you?
00:56:23We be a-needing them, but we brought out a rifle ball.
00:56:26Well, stop fretting.
00:56:27We'll get you out of here.
00:56:29We'll get you out of here.
00:56:30We'll get you out of here.
00:56:32We'll get you out of here.
00:56:33We'll get you out of here.
00:56:35Well, stop fretting.
00:56:37Can't you see they's a-flotching up a heap of rifle balls and fancy-shooting arms?
00:56:43I be a-knowing he's a revenuer.
00:56:46He was, but he's seen the light.
00:56:48He's a plum-changed character.
00:56:51Well, you gonna help us whoop the blue rags?
00:56:53Oh, sure I am. I mean, I sure am.
00:56:55Don be a-letter telling that Snuffy be acting...taged.
00:56:59What he be doing?
00:57:01He be a-talking to and a-feeding Mr. Carson.
00:57:05When Mr. Carson want that.
00:57:07He want that, but they want a-seeing him.
00:57:12I'll be telling you the secret.
00:57:13If you promise you won't tell Snuffy.
00:57:16I won't promise him.
00:57:22There be Mr. Carson.
00:57:26There be the joke.
00:57:36It was a work of the devil.
00:57:43Where's Snuffy Smith?
00:57:44He be out there with his friend the General.
00:57:47Well, here's the pack where I put the range finder, Janie.
00:57:50You leave that be. That there be Snuffy.
00:57:52Oh, no, you don't.
00:57:58Mr. Carson, hear me talk.
00:58:01What is this?
00:58:02I told you there was a dog.
00:58:06It be dog invention.
00:58:07You be one of them filth-comers my Snuffy be a-talking about.
00:58:10I'm going to take you two filthy stumps to my man.
00:58:13Get going. Get!
00:58:23Range 2600.
00:58:31You missed, Sergeant.
00:58:33You missed, Sergeant.
00:58:41You missed, Sergeant.
00:58:46You missed, Sergeant.
00:58:56Range 2100.
00:59:02You're dead.
00:59:09You're dead.
00:59:14You're dead.
00:59:20Hey, what's going on in here?
00:59:28Hey, what's going on here?
00:59:59I'm dead.
01:00:03One suicide.
01:00:17Mr. Soja, can you tell me where my snuffy bee is?
01:00:20I'm sorry, ma'am, but I'm dead.
01:00:22Whose ghost are you?
01:00:24Look, General, this old gal's batty.
01:00:26I'm taking these two filth cones to my snuffy.
01:00:29What have they done?
01:00:31They've been taking Don's invention.
01:00:33I think it's too late, but if I weren't dead, I'd say they're on top of that peak.
01:00:37What do you believe, Houston?
01:00:39Be a track maker.
01:00:41Hey, Dave, you're just tired. Come along.
01:00:57We're practically surrounded by the Blue Army.
01:01:00What a spot for my range finder.
01:01:02Anything would help.
01:01:04You've only got two hits so far.
01:01:07Oh, I hate umpires.
01:01:13This here army gun ain't no good.
01:01:15I put a bead on them and they ain't a-pullin'.
01:01:17Sir!
01:01:20My no-das are feedin' them.
01:01:26Hey, this ain't no place for a woman, folks.
01:01:28If you're goin' home, we'll catch ya.
01:01:31Get the tripod. Get over here.
01:01:33Look out the way. Get this thing set up. Come on.
01:01:41Range 600.
01:01:43Range 600.
01:01:45Range 600.
01:01:47Range 600.
01:01:49Range 600.
01:01:51Range 600.
01:01:53Range 600.
01:01:56Direct hit.
01:02:02Range 825.
01:02:04Range 825.
01:02:21Direct hit.
01:02:23Direct hit.
01:02:25Ooh, let's go.
01:02:27Range 632.
01:02:32Just put the entire Blue Army headquarters out of action.
01:02:36Boy, this thing sure works.
01:02:38Yeah, I knew it would.
01:02:41I'm a dead pigeon.
01:02:45Come on, let's try something hard.
01:02:47What?
01:02:48Look, look.
01:02:52Formation 3200.
01:02:54How much 3200?
01:03:013200.
01:03:033200.
01:03:053200.
01:03:073200.
01:03:10Direct hit.
01:03:12Chief umpire declares armistice to reorganize Blue Army
01:03:15due to accuracy of artillery fire from Navajo.
01:03:20Hey, what you doin' to my friend the general?
01:03:26Now, we see he be helpin' me bring in these two filth combs.
01:03:32He be tryin' to take my khaki breeches.
01:03:35Take him away.
01:03:40You'd be very proud of your wife.
01:03:42I do be.
01:03:43She's worth her weight in hog livers.
01:03:57You were right about that range finder.
01:03:59I'll send a complete report to the War Department.
01:04:01Thank you, sir.
01:04:02I knew you'd win the war.
01:04:04Gosh, honey.
01:04:07How far up was that flying machine?
01:04:103200 feet.
01:04:12Was that the thing that tellin' Juan to aim the gun?
01:04:16Yeah.
01:04:18Elby?
01:04:20The feudal.
01:04:22So it was that thing that tellin' Juan to aim the gun?
01:04:25Yeah.
01:04:27Elby?
01:04:29The feudal.
01:04:52Oh, sweet!
01:04:54Oh.
01:05:00Ha, ha, ha.
01:05:02Ha, ha, ha.
01:05:22Ha, ha, ha.
01:05:52Oh, sweet!

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