Homemade video
Category
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FunTranscript
00:00Good morning.
00:11Arey, uth gayi maharani?
00:13Kal raat main bahot enjoy kar rahi thi. Isliye main late uthi.
00:17Enjoy? Wo kiske saath kya tu de?
00:20Apne superhero ke saath.
00:22Superhero means?
00:24Kal raat mera superhero aaya tha.
00:26Usne mujhe apne rocket pe bitha ke poore jannat ke sahar kar rahi.
00:30Chal yaar, kuch bhi fake thi hai.
00:34Tu na, apne imagination apne paas hi rakh.
00:37Jab dekho, ulti siddhi imagination karte rehti.
00:40Main proof kar sakti ho.
00:42Acha? Kya proof hai tere paas?
00:46Kya hoga?
00:49Yeh dekho kaccha.
00:52Kal raat jab mera superhero mujhe jannat ke sahar kar raha tha.
00:57Toh yeh yaha pe hi chod diya.
01:00Tera acha hai yaar. Tu kuch bhi imagine karke apna kaam nikal sakti hai.
01:05Haslo haslo. Ek din dekhna, tum dono bhi mere baaton pe vishwas karoge.
01:11Chal yaar, teri imagination band kar.
01:13Main late ho rahi hoon aur main jaa rahi hoon.
01:16Chal bye.
01:17Aur haan, aaj raat main nahi aaongi kyunki mera night shift hai.
01:20Chal bye.
01:24Rhea, main bhi jaa rahi hoon.
01:26Mera tuition class ka time ho gaye hai.
01:29Theek hai?
01:30Theek hai. Bye. Main so rahi hoon.
01:40Good morning madam.
01:48Kha chandan se gadraya hua badan hai yaar.
01:54Ek baar iske body ko guard karne ka agar mauka humko mil jaye.
01:59Ram kasam, yeh jeevan mein madam kabhi,
02:04toosre guard ka danda kabhi nahi lege.
02:07Pakka.
02:17Pakka.
02:35Aapka naam?
02:36Urvashi Das.
02:37Do hazaar rupe deeji.
02:48Good morning, madam.
02:49Good morning.
03:03Hello jee, madam.
03:04Ek ek karke marzo ko bhejna shuru karo.
03:06Okay, madam.
03:09Urvashi.
03:10Aaj jee.
03:11Aaj jee.
03:13Okay, madam.
03:15Urvashi.
03:16Aaj jee.
03:17Aap andar jaye.
03:18Okay.
03:26Good morning, Dr. Sahiba.
03:28Good morning. Please have a seat.
03:33Aapka reports maine dekh liye hain.
03:34Koi tension wali baat toh nahi hai na, doctor?
03:37Aapka profession kya hai?
03:40I am a call girl.
03:43I think so.
03:44Mujhe dekh ke laga hi tha.
03:45But abhi toh clear bhi ho gaya hai.
03:48Anyway,
03:49jab aap apne customer ke saath driving karti hai,
03:52toh aapka customer helmet pehnta hai ya nahi?
03:56Matlab?
03:57Matlab aapka customer condom use karta hai ki nahi?
04:02Wo kya hai na, Dr. Sahiba.
04:05Main bina helmet ka kisi bhi customer ko
04:07apni driving seat pe baithne nahi deti.
04:09Par haan,
04:11mera ek best friend hai,
04:12toh aap sirf mein uske saath
04:14bina helmet ka hi driving kar leti ho.
04:18Okay.
04:19Par aage se aisa mat keechega.
04:21Kyu?
04:22Wo kya hai na,
04:23ki aapke bina helmet wale best friend ko AIDS hai.
04:27Aur aapke reports ke matabik,
04:28aapko bhi AIDS ho sakta hai.
04:31Kya?
04:33Dandhi ki koi baat nahi hai.
04:34Abhi toh bas AIDS ke symptoms hai.
04:37Main aapko kuch medicines ke naam likhe de rahi ho.
04:39Usko timetable se aap ne leechega.
04:42Aur haan,
04:43helmet pehndna mat do diyega.
04:46Ji, doctor.
04:51Yeh leeche.
04:54Thank you, doctor.
05:03Ji, madam.
05:05Next.
05:06Okay, madam.
05:08Aap andar jayiye.
05:20Ji, madam.
05:21Andar aayiye aap.
05:26Aur mareez hai kya?
05:27Mujhse bada mareez aur kon ho sakta hai,
05:29madam ji aapka.
05:31Toh phir paas aao na,
05:32aaj tumhara bhi treatment kar deti.
05:42Mani.
05:43Ji, madam.
05:44Kaha khoye ho?
05:46Ji, kahi nahi.
05:47Aur mareez hai kya?
05:49Ji, koi nahi hai.
05:54Hello.
05:56Yes, please come in.
05:58Tum jaa sakte ho.
06:00Okay, madam.
06:18Hi, Ishika.
06:19Hi, ma'am.
06:20Kaisi ho?
06:21Main bilkul theek ho. Aap batao?
06:22Main bhi achhi ho.
06:23Yeh lijiye chai.
06:27So sweet of you.
06:41Acha, suno na.
06:42Wo Kanchan ke ghar jaana hai.
06:44Aapko yaad hai na?
06:47Haan, wo...
06:48Acha jaa, okay, okay.
06:49Ishika.
06:50Aaj ke badai ho gayi.
06:51Tum jaa.
06:52Kya na, mujhe wo kuch urgent kaam se jaana hai.
06:54Kya na, mujhe wo kuch urgent kaam se jaana hai.
06:56Okay.
06:57Bye, ma'am.
06:58Bye.
07:00Bye.
07:14Oh shit, yaar.
07:15Main toh apne ek book hi bhul gayi.
07:23Jab bhi main shaadi ki baat karti ho,
07:24tum hamesha daal dete ho.
07:26Aisi baat nahi hai, baby.
07:27Dekho,
07:28shaadi toh main karne wala hi ho.
07:30Theek hai?
07:31Aur wo bhi main tum se hi karunga.
07:33Theek hai?
07:34Mujhe thoda sa time deto, please.
07:36Aur kitna time chahiye tumhe, Aman?
07:38Dekho, next week na,
07:40mere papa mummy aa rahe hain, America se.
07:42Jaise hi aayenge, main shaadi ki baat karunga na.
07:46Pakka na?
07:47Pakka, promise.
07:49But, aaj raat tum toh mere ghar mein aaogi na.
07:52Aman,
07:53aaj raat meri night shift hai.
07:55Please, parso milte hain.
07:59Theek hai, baby.
08:01Mujhe abhi nikalna hai,
08:02kyunki mere patients aane wali hai.
08:04Lekin usse pehle,
08:06ek goodbye.
08:10Hello?
08:24Yaar, Ishika.
08:26Tu, yeh sab chhod pehle,
08:27yeh pata kar ki yeh chaddichaur hai kaun.
08:51Waah!
08:52Yeh saab door mil raha hai.
08:56Good night, madam ji.
09:10Are you f***ing mad?
09:12Kya karu yaar?
09:13Main jab bhi tujhe dekhti hoon na,
09:15mujhse control nahi hota hai.
09:17Isliye main teri gaadi ki horn baja deti hoon.
09:26Ishika,
09:27teri toh,
09:28teko chhodungi nahi.
09:39Ek baat bata,
09:41tune jo wo bola hai na,
09:43wo kya possible ho sakta hai?
09:46Of course, possible hai.
09:48Lekin tum chaho toh.
09:51Matlab, aise kaise?
09:52Matlab, hum log agar
09:53kisi ko imagine kar rahe hain,
09:55toh wahi cheez
09:56hum log ke saath
09:57idhar ho rahe hain.
09:59Kaise?
10:01Isse hi toh kehte hai
10:02imagination.
10:05Acha ek baat bata,
10:07tum sabse zyada pyaar
10:09kisse karti hoon?
10:11Obviously, Santosh sir.
10:12Aur kaun?
10:14Theek hai.
10:16Toh,
10:17Santosh sir ko apni aankhe band kar ki
10:19imagination kar.
10:21Aur dekh,
10:22wo tere paas,
10:23tere bistar mein rahenge.
10:25Really?
10:26Is possible?
10:27Yes, possible.
10:29Okay.
10:31One minute.
10:35Chalo, uth jao.
10:48Aur ab tum so chao.
10:52Chalo.
10:57Aur yeh patti
10:58tum tab tak nahi khologe,
11:00jab tak tumhare
11:01Santosh sir
11:03tumhare bed par nahi honge.
11:05Okay.
11:06Tab tak main apni writing
11:07complete karke aati hoon.
11:08Okay.
11:09Bye-bye.
11:10Bye-bye.
11:23Historycho
11:47Ishika!
11:49Ishika!
11:50Ishika, wake up. It's too much. You've been sleeping for so long.
12:02Good morning.
12:04Good morning.
12:13Hey, where are my clothes?
12:17Your tuition teacher, Santosh sir, may have removed them.
12:26You're right. I imagined Santosh sir and he was in my bed too.
12:32But how did I know? You're great.
12:37That means you also got on that rocket.
12:41Yes, I enjoyed a lot.
12:44Come, give me a hug.
12:48What's the matter? You both are in love.
12:52I hope you didn't become that.
12:55I mean, is everything fine?
12:57All is well.
12:59Riya, you're great. And your imagination is also great.
13:06Oh God! Are you both crazy?
13:09One day you'll also go crazy because of Riya's imagination.
13:11I'm telling you.
13:13You also trust Riya's imagination.
13:18You know, I don't need anything.
13:21I already have a rocket in my life.
13:23And I'm going to marry him very soon.
13:26Really? Congratulations. When are you getting married?
13:30I told you, very soon.
13:32I'll take a bath and get ready quickly.
13:35You both make your own breakfast today.
13:37Make your own breakfast?
13:42And tell me, Riya.
13:44How's your My Book imagination going on?
13:48Almost done, Riya.
13:50Just some finishing touches are left.
13:53And I'll also pray to God
13:56that your book gets published soon
13:59and you get the award of Best Writer.
14:04Most welcome, baby.
14:05And how's your and Santosh sir's love story going on?
14:10That's not going to happen.
14:12Just the same imagination is going on.
14:15It's a very sad love story.
14:17I don't know what's going to happen next.
14:19By the way, when you're with Riya,
14:22you remind me of Santosh sir and Salman Khan.
14:27By the way, Rangoli.
14:29Tell me something.
14:31Why don't you do it?
14:32Why don't you do it?
14:34Imagination.
14:39Yes, Riya does her imagination very well.
14:43You should try it.
14:45It's such an ultimate scene.
14:47I don't need imagination.
14:50I've had my breakfast.
14:52I'm going now.
14:54You just shifted here last night.
14:56And now you're going again.
14:58I had emergency cases yesterday.
15:00That's why I had to shift.
15:02I have an appointment with my patients.
15:04I have to go.
15:06Bye.
15:08I'm busy.
15:27Good morning, madam.
15:29Good morning. How are you?
15:30I'm fine, madam.
15:32Good.
15:43Hello, madam.
15:45Okay, madam.
15:47Pajhar.
15:49I'm Pajhar.
15:51You also go.
15:57Please sit.
16:01So, tell me.
16:03What's your problem?
16:05Problem is always a problem, doctor.
16:09Actually, no matter what the weather is,
16:12my stick doesn't stand up.
16:14It always bows down.
16:16What do I tell you?
16:18Anyway, leave it.
16:20Madam, give me some medicine
16:22so that I can walk again
16:24and plant the crops of the barren land.
16:26Okay.
16:28So, you are a farmer.
16:30So, when you want to dig with your stick,
16:34how do you do it?
16:36I can't do it, madam.
16:38As soon as I go to dig with my stick,
16:41the water from my pot immediately falls down.
16:45I got your problem.
16:47So, from now on, whenever you want to dig,
16:49tell your wife to foreplay.
16:53All your problems will be solved.
16:56Foreplay?
16:58What's that?
17:00Before doing that,
17:02tell your wife to ring your doorbell
17:05and slowly press both her doorbells.
17:09Go down slowly and open her lock.
17:13And get in.
17:15Hmm.
17:17Now I understand, madam.
17:19From now on, I will first ring my doorbell.
17:23After that, I will press both her doorbells.
17:27The way she is pressing.
17:28Isn't it?
17:30After that,
17:32as you said in English,
17:34go down and get in.
17:36See you.
17:49Don't come back here again.
17:51Dad, what's my fault?
17:53Fault? No one is worthy of this society.
17:55And there is no place for you in this society.
17:56There is a place.
18:00What happened, Riya?
18:02Why did you wake up in such a hurry?
18:04Have you seen the same dream again?
18:07Because of your dream, my dream got spoiled.
18:11It's okay. Go to sleep.
18:13Go to sleep.
18:16Go to sleep, dear.
18:27Tell me.
18:31Okay, Rangoli.
18:33Hmm.
18:35You are going to the hospital very early these days.
18:38What's the matter?
18:40Actually, I am not going to the hospital today.
18:42I am going to meet Aman.
18:44Oh.
18:46That means you will treat Dr. Aman today.
18:49Hmm.
18:51Love treatment.
18:53Hmm.
18:54Oh, please.
18:56Don't make fun of me early in the morning.
18:58Quickly have your breakfast.
19:00Because I am getting late.
19:02Oh, you are getting late.
19:04I think you are going to do night scenes during the day.
19:06Don't you think of anything else other than fucking and sucking?
19:09What to do?
19:11After seeing you, I only think of fucking and sucking.
19:14Why?
19:16Do I have a banana in my mouth?
19:18Baby, if there was a banana hanging,
19:20we would have peeled it and eaten it.
19:22Really?
19:24For now, you both eat this banana.
19:29Because I am getting late and I am going to change.
19:33Thank you, baby.