Category
🎥
CortometraggiTrascrizione
00:00:00My name is Abbey Whitecloud, I'm just shy of my 22nd birthday, and I live in the godforsaken
00:00:17town of Fossil Ridge, Texas, with one gas station and a main street.
00:00:22We're 100 miles from the closest big city of Abilene, the place I was named after, and
00:00:28where I plan to head to as soon as I can.
00:00:31I just want to get out of here and become one of those famous singers, the kind of singers
00:00:35that get so big they forget where they came from.
00:00:36I'm a direct descendant of Chief Cochise, at least that's what my mom said, who was
00:00:37a keeper of our native traditions.
00:00:38She said my stubbornness comes from him.
00:00:39Maybe even my skills improve one or two.
00:00:40Six months ago my mom was out in the forest, praying to the great spirits, praying for
00:00:41a better life.
00:01:12She said, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going
00:01:19to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going
00:01:28to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going
00:01:34to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going
00:01:35to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going
00:01:36to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going
00:01:37to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:01:38going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:01:39going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:01:40going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:01:41going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:01:42going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:01:43going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:01:44going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:01:45going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:02:07going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:02:31going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:02:58going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:03:27going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:03:56going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:04:25going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:04:51going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not
00:05:21going to die, I'm not going to die, I'm not going to die
00:05:47Last night, baby
00:05:52Mr. Young, yes, sir. You know, that would be a short subject. That would be an Anderson Hall
00:05:58literature
00:06:00So class no longer do we ask when?
00:06:03Mr. Young's answered that question for us. Now. We ask the question why?
00:06:08When it's amazing
00:06:11Be there, it's the Austral pickus africanus upright for the first time
00:06:17What? I got him.
00:06:19We're not going. We're going to town. We're going skiing.
00:06:21Not this year. The yellow.
00:06:23The yellow.
00:06:25Sheldon. So the question why did man become upright? Simple, class.
00:06:31Survival
00:06:35You're stepping in rhythm with my heart beat
00:06:40Oh
00:07:10Oh, baby, this love thing that I've got for you.
00:07:16Oh, baby, this love thing, I know you feel it, too.
00:07:22Come on in.
00:07:26Yeah?
00:07:28Got to head to Billy Wayne's.
00:07:29Billy Wayne's?
00:07:32Thanks.
00:07:36Guess my mom should have bought a certified free-on-vehicle.
00:07:40You know, something with a multi-point inspection.
00:07:43I'm thinking about selling the place.
00:07:46And now this godforsaken town.
00:07:48You know, I was sure sorry when I heard about your mom.
00:07:51I don't want to talk about that right now, though.
00:08:10Ugh!
00:08:19It's going to blunt you.
00:08:20You need to leave him alone.
00:08:21You act like I need this crap, man.
00:08:23I'm going to do like my old man did.
00:08:26Pyramid schemes, limited partner, and white-collar crime
00:08:29is the only way to go.
00:08:30I don't go to school for this crap, man.
00:08:33Honestly.
00:08:36That right there is the whole purpose of continuing your education.
00:08:39That's 7 million years of revolution calling out to me to celebrate.
00:08:42St. Lucas, multiply the union race.
00:08:48What are you doing with my mom's station wagon, man?
00:08:51Detail is detail.
00:08:53I got a surprise for you.
00:08:54Come look in the back.
00:08:55No, no, no.
00:08:56We cannot take this on the trip.
00:08:57We're not doing it, man.
00:08:58Are you crazy?
00:09:00Surprise.
00:09:01Oh, no.
00:09:03Is that Beast?
00:09:04Hey, Sheldon.
00:09:05Hey, Lucas.
00:09:08You got to love them, though, right?
00:09:09All right.
00:09:10Imagine this.
00:09:11Tonight, me and you at the Taos Mountain Ski Resort,
00:09:13four girls, eight titties,
00:09:16and I'm going to have them in your face, man.
00:09:17Girls are going to be all in your face.
00:09:19Why?
00:09:20Because I'm the titty man,
00:09:21and the titty man never disappoints.
00:09:23You ready?
00:09:24Here's your cherry to wait.
00:09:26I hate you.
00:09:27How can you hate me?
00:09:28We're going to Taos.
00:09:36Evelyn.
00:09:38My Evelyn.
00:09:40The prettiest butt I've ever seen.
00:09:44Evelyn.
00:09:45Oh, hey.
00:09:46Boy, listen.
00:09:47We need some more of that secret ingredient now.
00:09:50No stupid squirrel.
00:09:53I've got to have squirrels, son.
00:09:55I've got to have squirrels.
00:09:57That's it, boy.
00:09:58We don't want to give you some squirrels.
00:10:00Go on now, boy.
00:10:01What's that wrong with you?
00:10:03We get to need some too.
00:10:05Talk that talk to me.
00:10:07Just what's your issue?
00:10:09Got a bad side?
00:10:12I want to see it.
00:10:17I want to see it.
00:10:19I want to see it.
00:10:33This wasn't part of the bargain, Billy.
00:10:38I'm sorry.
00:10:40Did you say something to me?
00:10:42I'm not wearing this crap anymore.
00:10:45Now if I recall,
00:10:47I believe your mama bought a truck from me.
00:10:50Now, I'm sorry that she's dead and all,
00:10:53but y'all have a few more payments to go.
00:10:56So, until you're holding the title to that fine automobile
00:11:02and them sweet little hands of yours,
00:11:05you'll wear what I tell you.
00:11:09Get on over there to table number four.
00:11:12Now, get!
00:11:15I want to see it.
00:11:17Hey, Abbott!
00:11:18You know, you ought to hook up with that mad duck.
00:11:21I hear you, and you ain't never going to hook up too, bitch.
00:11:29How y'all doing?
00:11:30I know you're so lucky, so lucky, so lucky
00:11:32to be entertained this evening by Little Willie and the Willettes.
00:11:36Here we go, babies. Ready?
00:11:37One, two, one, two, three, four!
00:11:41Chocolate!
00:11:45Chocolate!
00:11:59Now, I'm going to call in the NAASPCA on y'all.
00:12:02And what about the NRA?
00:12:05We're going to die!
00:12:08We were just leaving.
00:12:14It's been a nice meeting you.
00:12:15She'll write, she'll write, she'll call you.
00:12:17She'll send you e-mails.
00:12:34You're not the titty man.
00:12:35I'm the titty man.
00:12:37Lucas, where are we going, man?
00:12:38Oh, bro, chill out, man.
00:12:40You're the goose, I'm the maverick.
00:12:42I'm in control, baby. I got the wheels.
00:12:44Oh, Beast, come on, man!
00:12:46Oh, bro, no matter what I do,
00:12:50I can live to 200 years old and never run out of stuff.
00:12:54What stuff?
00:12:55Don't act stupid with my stuff.
00:12:58Really, what were you talking about?
00:13:02Love goo.
00:13:04Love goo?
00:13:06Baby batter.
00:13:07Baby batter, man, that's a good one, bro.
00:13:09So it's pretty safe to assume that your life's ambition is to run out of spark.
00:13:14That's it.
00:13:23Marcus, what's up?
00:13:26No, I haven't seen it.
00:13:28Well, I haven't checked my e-mail yet.
00:13:30I'll get it up right now.
00:13:32Got it. I'll call you back.
00:13:36There's a killing in this town called Fossil Ridge, Texas.
00:13:40There's something weird about it.
00:13:42How so?
00:13:43They found the remains. It was killed by an animal, a large animal.
00:13:45They can't figure out what type.
00:13:47What, is it some type of chupacabra crap?
00:13:49Every time one of these podunkicks gets killed by some rabid dog,
00:13:53they say it's space aliens or some crap, and then they call us.
00:13:56Well, if they didn't call us, you'd be out of a job, my man.
00:14:00Just because you believe this crazy crap, don't expect me to.
00:14:04I don't give a damn what you believe, O'Reilly.
00:14:06Do you know why I'm here?
00:14:08This is just punishment.
00:14:10Me screwing the bureau chief's daughter.
00:14:12This is just my version of Siberia.
00:14:14Well, if you think this place is remote, get packing, because we're going to the boonies.
00:14:19And we're driving.
00:14:20Driving?
00:14:21The nearest town is 200 miles from an airport.
00:14:25Great, great. It's perfect.
00:14:27Shalom, chabber. Let's go.
00:14:35I love this commercial.
00:14:37And I love you too, Josie, baby.
00:14:39You love everything.
00:14:41Kiss my butt.
00:14:43You look like you should be shopping at the goth cave with all that stuff you got on.
00:14:47I'm Willie.
00:14:49If you see a slut mart along the way, make sure we stop and drop off little Josie.
00:14:53She needs to get some new clothes.
00:14:55Girl, you better hush your mouth, you little cracker zombie.
00:14:59You better quit picking on Josie.
00:15:00Josie, I love you, baby.
00:15:02You better stop talking about her.
00:15:05Like me.
00:15:06You know, I really do think you should change your outfit.
00:15:08Black does not compliment your skin tone.
00:15:11I happen to like my skin tone and what I'm wearing.
00:15:13It looks a lot better than your old hooker skirt you got on.
00:15:15It is not a hooker skirt and I look fine.
00:15:18Hey, we're going to L.A., baby.
00:15:19We're going to lay out on the beach and we're going to get a tea.
00:15:22It's going to be so much fun.
00:15:29Lucas.
00:15:31Did you know we were almost out of gas?
00:15:35No.
00:15:36Why didn't you fill up the tank with us?
00:15:37We had $24 last year.
00:15:39How much you got this year?
00:15:41I'm not going to buy any of this. I ain't got no cash.
00:15:44I'm going to get this all in my car.
00:15:46Exactly.
00:15:47You are a hassle.
00:15:48I love you.
00:15:49You know what I'm going to do, child?
00:15:51What?
00:15:52I'm going to pull up to the next gas station and I'm going to get us a big old box of Twinkies.
00:15:57I love Twinkies.
00:15:58Do you know what he's talking about?
00:15:59Yeah, Twinkies.
00:16:00Not that kind.
00:16:01Willie's talking about cute guys.
00:16:03I like cute guys.
00:16:04That's cute little white men.
00:16:05That's why I like cute little white men.
00:16:07Me and Josie both like cute little white men.
00:16:09Thank you very much.
00:16:17What is that fat fuck?
00:16:18Beast.
00:16:19What?
00:16:20Man, what is the matter with you?
00:16:25Y'all smell that?
00:16:26Y'all smell that?
00:16:27What is that?
00:16:45Yeah, we're about 20 minutes away.
00:16:47Okay, we'll see you there.
00:16:48CSI's already on the scene.
00:16:50When we get there, let's make sure that we tell them.
00:16:52Oh my God, is that you?
00:16:54Nope.
00:16:55It's a little worse out there.
00:16:56Why does it always stink out in these places?
00:16:59Oh my God.
00:17:00Dude, that's not me.
00:17:01That's not me this time.
00:17:02What are you talking about?
00:17:03Dude, no.
00:17:04You need to see a doctor.
00:17:05No, no, no.
00:17:06I've been with my own sick for 23 years and I know that's not me.
00:17:24Okay.
00:17:47Atwood.
00:17:48Agent, how was the drive?
00:17:51Don't ask.
00:17:52Okay.
00:17:53How y'all doing?
00:17:54I'm Sheriff Morgan.
00:17:55I'm Deputy Jones.
00:17:56Sheriff's son.
00:17:57Special Agent Logan and this is O'Reilly.
00:17:59Special Agent O'Reilly.
00:18:01Nice to meet you.
00:18:02Nice to meet you.
00:18:04Do you have a chance to check anything out yet?
00:18:06No.
00:18:07Well, in all my years, I've never seen anything like this before.
00:18:10We've had some very unusual killings.
00:18:12You know, cattle missing and stuff.
00:18:14But there's never been anything left.
00:18:16I'm talking no remains.
00:18:18But now...
00:18:19He's right.
00:18:20This, this is very unusual.
00:18:22The teeth marks indicate a very large predator type creature.
00:18:25By creature, you mean like a dog or a wolf?
00:18:28Sure.
00:18:29The dog is about 10 feet tall.
00:18:31Actually, over by the creek, we have some very strange footprints.
00:18:35If you can call them feet.
00:18:37So, we talking about a canine?
00:18:39No.
00:18:40I mean, I don't know.
00:18:47We'll still need to run some tests
00:18:49and do the DNA.
00:18:52We still really have a lot of work here.
00:19:03The arm looks of African-American descent.
00:19:06What's odd is how clean it's severed.
00:19:09Here's the crazy thing.
00:19:12That doesn't look like any document I've ever seen.
00:19:16Yeah, I know.
00:19:18Doug, you want a bone?
00:19:20I'll give you my number any time.
00:19:30What if it ain't Dr. McCain?
00:19:34What if it ain't Dr. McCain?
00:19:50You been doing a little hunting there, Doc?
00:19:54Cold front's moving through.
00:19:56And I'm gonna need all your gas filler generators.
00:20:00Say, Abby, it looks like Dr. Cain's wind chute could use a little cleaning.
00:20:04So, if you don't mind.
00:20:06You know, when we say service, here are Billy Wayne, swine, and dime.
00:20:10We mean service.
00:20:31What the hell you think he's raising out there, Billy?
00:20:34Some of them flesh-eating ape men?
00:20:37Nah, that's ridiculous.
00:20:40Sheriff, I think we're gonna have to wait a few more days.
00:20:43There's a lodge about 15 miles back up the road, not too far from the station.
00:20:47Great.
00:20:49I know I don't have to tell you this, but...
00:20:51Don't worry, Agent Logan. We know not to say a word.
00:20:54I'm heading back to Quantico now.
00:20:56We've got all we can get here. The rest is lab work.
00:20:58We'll need you guys to keep this area under lockdown until our people get here tomorrow morning.
00:21:02Sure. No problem.
00:21:19Oh, Abby. Abby.
00:21:21Abby.
00:21:25You know, I'd be damned if I didn't spend my whole life researching.
00:21:31And now can't live to the day that I'm able to share it with the world.
00:21:37You know, Abby, life is... is ironic.
00:21:43Whatever you decide to do, you give it your best.
00:21:49Take care, Dr. Kane.
00:22:14How you boys doing? What can I get for you?
00:22:17Coffee.
00:22:19Same.
00:22:20Where you guys in from?
00:22:22Oh, we're just rolling through, ma'am.
00:22:25You're here cause of the killings, huh?
00:22:29Just a routine investigation.
00:22:31You can stop with the charade. Everyone knows something's going on around here.
00:22:35What do you mean?
00:22:36Carrie-Anne!
00:22:38They're gonna find out eventually.
00:22:40Carrie-Anne, can I speak to you now?
00:22:43Do not say a word to these guys.
00:22:45They can get us into a lot of trouble. We could lose everything.
00:22:48You go out there and just serve them coffee. Don't say a word.
00:22:56We don't want to draw any attention.
00:22:58Like I said, it's just routine.
00:23:00If I were you, I'd go to Old Man Kane.
00:23:02That's enough. That's enough!
00:23:05You guys eating or what?
00:23:07Chicken fried steak.
00:23:09Same.
00:23:10Good choice.
00:23:40Oh, look! Look! There's a town back there!
00:23:42We missed it!
00:23:50There's definitely something going on here.
00:23:52Three people going missing in three months.
00:23:54Not to mention seven dogs and more than a dozen cattle.
00:23:59It's the bloodsucker Chupacabra!
00:24:02Will you not be an idiot?
00:24:03I mean, come on. You gotta see there's something wrong here.
00:24:06I mean, what does that mean? Is it something supernatural?
00:24:09I mean, it could be a number of things.
00:24:11Really? What?
00:24:14Um...
00:24:16I'm listening.
00:24:18Aliens. Oh, for Christ's sake.
00:24:21Not those type of aliens.
00:24:23Illegal aliens.
00:24:25Or drug runners.
00:24:27Drug runners with six-inch teeth that eat people?
00:24:31Come on, man.
00:24:32We gotta see the whole picture and embrace all the possibilities.
00:24:35That waitress said something about an old man Cain's place, right?
00:24:38Let's go there first thing in the morning.
00:25:06Ah!
00:25:13Bro, you just need to chill, all right? It's not my fault.
00:25:15Yes, it is, man.
00:25:16If you would have just swallowed your friggin' pride and just admitted that we were out of gas,
00:25:19then we wouldn't even be here in the first place.
00:25:22Perfect.
00:25:23I mean, that's not even a possible image to recount, all right?
00:25:26I'm sure they got a gas station.
00:25:28Well, yeah, I hope they do.
00:25:35Uh...
00:25:40Uh...
00:25:41Where are we?
00:25:56This is bullshit!
00:26:00Hey, bro, if we were flown,
00:26:02that right there would have been the senior weed mess.
00:26:05Shut up. Let's just get some gas.
00:26:07Come on.
00:26:12Howdy, boys!
00:26:14Y'all here for some of Bill's famous pulled pork?
00:26:17Still got a little bit in the back.
00:26:19I think we're gonna pass.
00:26:21So y'all ain't hungry?
00:26:23Y'all don't need anything inside?
00:26:25Not at this time, man.
00:26:27All we need is some gas, and then we'll be out of here.
00:26:31Looks like y'all ain't going anywhere, see?
00:26:34What do you mean? We just need some gas, man.
00:26:36Yeah, bro. The shaggin' wagon needs fuel.
00:26:39Y'all are shit out of luck.
00:26:42What the asshole is telling you?
00:26:45We ain't got no gas.
00:26:53What the hell is that?
00:27:00Shit!
00:27:12Ooh, this time it's so wacky! Ooh, this time it's so wacky!
00:27:16That's so rich.
00:27:31Who's that?
00:27:35Uh, excuse me, sir.
00:27:37Do you have a mechanical-type like individual that could be working on my bus?
00:27:40You see, it broke down, and we really need to be moving on down the road.
00:27:43We got a big show that we need to be getting on down there.
00:27:45Now, we look... Ooh.
00:27:47Would you happen to be the little mechanical-type like man?
00:27:50No. We just need some gas, man.
00:27:52Well, what's wrong with the gas here?
00:27:54Do you need some Supreme Plus?
00:27:56No.
00:27:58Supreme Plus?
00:28:00No. They ran out of gas.
00:28:02They ran out of gas?
00:28:04What's he mean, they ran out of gas?
00:28:06What kind of gas station runs out of gas?
00:28:08Oh, my Lord, I don't... I don't understand that.
00:28:10This ain't happening.
00:28:14What the hell was that?
00:28:20That there's coming from crazy Dr. Cain's place.
00:28:24Some people say he's growing 20-foot meat-eating emus up there.
00:28:28They say he was kicked out of the big city for doing some sort of freaky-ass experiments.
00:28:33Who knows what he's got up there?
00:28:35But I know this much.
00:28:37He's got all the gas.
00:28:39Till morning.
00:28:43Goodnight.
00:28:45Goodnight? Did he say goodnight?
00:28:47Does that mean we have to spend the night here?
00:28:49Hey, Abby.
00:28:51You lock up tonight.
00:28:55Don't even think about it.
00:29:05Um, excuse me, Mr. Redneck.
00:29:07Where are we supposed to sleep?
00:29:09That's a tour bus, ain't it?
00:29:11Sleep in it!
00:29:13Wait, wait, wait. Where are you going?
00:29:16I'm quitting.
00:29:18What? What are we...
00:29:20No, no, no. Stop. Where are you going?
00:29:23I'm going to my truck.
00:29:24Wait, you've got a truck?
00:29:26Yeah, I broke down.
00:29:27Wait, wait, wait. What about this doctor guy? Where does he live?
00:29:31Dr. Cain? He's pretty reclusive.
00:29:34He doesn't like anybody on his property.
00:29:36No, no, no. You don't understand.
00:29:38Maybe you could take us there and we could just ask him politely, of course,
00:29:41and maybe we could borrow some gas?
00:29:43Please, please take us there.
00:29:46Please.
00:29:48All right.
00:29:49Okay.
00:29:50Run!
00:29:53Run!
00:30:03Lucas!
00:30:05Man, you're not going to believe this.
00:30:07Josie and I, we were in the first grade together.
00:30:09I mean, same class and everything.
00:30:11What was her name? Miss, um...
00:30:13Miss Rutledge.
00:30:15Miss Hutchins.
00:30:16Miss Hutchins. Baby, thank you.
00:30:18You're welcome.
00:30:19Yeah, her pop got locked up and they waited for him to get up or something like that.
00:30:22You've got to get out of here, man.
00:30:24What?
00:30:25You've got to have a week.
00:30:29Hi.
00:30:31Nothing but that girl out there.
00:30:33Nobody around here seems right in the head, man.
00:30:35Yoo-hoo!
00:30:37Butterscotch.
00:30:39He likes you.
00:30:40Oh, dear Lord.
00:30:41Listen, how about this?
00:30:43Why don't you go on without me?
00:30:44By the time you get back, me and my classmate over there,
00:30:47we're already done kissing all over each other.
00:30:49And then I'll be ready to go.
00:30:52Hey, you like the Pulverizers?
00:30:55Yeah!
00:30:57Beast, come on. We're going.
00:30:59Okay.
00:31:00Would you care to join us on this adventure of ours?
00:31:10Oh, yeah. I'd be delighted.
00:31:12After you, my lady.
00:31:15Um, excuse me, Mr. Beastman, but where are you going?
00:31:19To meet the Mad Doctor.
00:31:29What the hell was that?
00:31:31I don't know.
00:31:49Dirt road? Middle of nowhere? Texas?
00:31:56I've seen this one.
00:32:02Look, maybe we got started on the wrong foot,
00:32:06but let me reintroduce myself.
00:32:08My name is Sheldon McAbeech. I'm of Irish descent.
00:32:11My favorite color is green.
00:32:13You know, green. Fighting Irish.
00:32:18My granddad was a veterinarian.
00:32:20You know, that's like a doctor,
00:32:22except, you know, he works with animals,
00:32:24dogs, cats, other assorted critters.
00:32:26You know, it's great to hear that your life is going so well.
00:32:30And you're not stuck in some shithole town like some of us.
00:32:35But you could do us all a favor.
00:32:38Sure. What?
00:32:41Shut up.
00:32:44Sure. Fine.
00:32:48I guess it's safe to say you were exactly this personality in high school.
00:32:54Hello?
00:32:55So you ready for this?
00:32:57Hey. Yeah, what? What you got?
00:33:00Well, the DNA report just came back.
00:33:02But we've got a problem.
00:33:04What kind of problem?
00:33:06Well, it's a bit inconclusive.
00:33:08Or better yet, highly impossible.
00:33:11The closest match was that of the dromosaurid theropod.
00:33:14You say that again?
00:33:16Better known as a velociraptor.
00:33:18Will you say that again? Because I thought I heard you say raptor.
00:33:20Look, I didn't say it as a raptor,
00:33:23but whatever's out there is very closely related.
00:33:26Very closely related to a reptile that hasn't been around since the Cretaceous period.
00:33:31That's over 75 million years ago.
00:33:34Wait, this is incredible.
00:33:36You got that right.
00:33:38Marcus is sending over a small army to quarantine the area.
00:33:41Yeah, sure.
00:33:42One other thing.
00:33:44These things are nocturnal.
00:33:46And one of the most ferocious hunters to ever walk the Earth.
00:33:50Whatever you do, stay indoors tonight.
00:33:53I gotta go. They're calling me.
00:33:55I'll talk to you later.
00:33:56Take care of yourself, Logan.
00:33:58Will do, Atwood. Bye.
00:34:03Oh man, you're not gonna believe this.
00:34:05What?
00:34:25What?
00:34:36Let's go.
00:34:56Who are you?
00:34:57What are you doing here?
00:34:59Get off my property.
00:35:01You shouldn't be here.
00:35:03The king is up.
00:35:05Abby?
00:35:06Yes, come on, let's get you up.
00:35:07Abby.
00:35:08Abby, what are you doing here?
00:35:10You're not supposed to be here.
00:35:11Come on, let's get you up.
00:35:12Let's get you up.
00:35:13Come on.
00:35:17Let's get you in the house.
00:35:18We're taking the house.
00:35:19Come on.
00:35:26Go!
00:35:29We could really use a hand, man.
00:35:32That's okay, man.
00:35:33You go on ahead.
00:35:35I'm gonna stay out here.
00:35:40Maybe some sort of a deranged garden gnome?
00:35:46You know, the kind that'll just rip the flesh right off your bones?
00:35:51You should all leave now, Abby.
00:35:55So you can take all your little friends and get them off my property.
00:36:02It isn't safe.
00:36:04What's not safe?
00:36:06He just said it's not safe here.
00:36:08Well, it certainly isn't for your friend's fear of yard art.
00:36:12Dr. King, I don't know what you're talking about.
00:36:15Well, it certainly isn't for your friend's fear of yard art.
00:36:19Dr. King, we should get you to a hospital.
00:36:22Is there some sort of medication you take?
00:36:24It's upstairs in the attic.
00:36:27But whatever you do, don't touch anything.
00:36:33Because I haven't finished the feeding.
00:36:35And she's gonna be so mad at me.
00:36:41I get just like Mrs. King when I get really hungry, too.
00:36:45I hope that's not Mrs. King.
00:36:47Dr. King has no wife.
00:36:50She died a long time ago.
00:36:52Well, if he's not talking about his wife,
00:36:55who the hell's he talking about?
00:37:01I really have no idea.
00:37:04Where are you going?
00:37:06I'm going upstairs to get his medicine.
00:37:16What's that?
00:37:23Hello?
00:37:27Anybody in there?
00:37:37A Kraken!
00:37:39A Kraken!
00:37:41Oh!
00:37:43Oh!
00:37:45Kraken ho-sauce!
00:37:47A Kraken ho-sauce!
00:38:13A Kraken ho-sauce!
00:38:23Dr. Kane, can we borrow some gas?
00:38:43No.
00:39:14Oh, shit.
00:39:39Sweet child of mine!
00:39:43No!
00:39:47No!
00:39:51Wait. I think something's happening.
00:39:57Can I sit next to the dead guy in the truck?
00:40:03You guys gotta go check out these bald chickens, man!
00:40:06Is that guy dead?
00:40:08I love you, my darling.
00:40:12I love you.
00:40:15You two need to go get a room.
00:40:17Sounds like a plan to me.
00:40:19Come on, guys! Come on!
00:40:21You gotta go check out these Kraken ho-sauces!
00:40:30Check this out!
00:40:37Those don't look like chickens to me.
00:40:42Dad! Go!
00:40:51Cheerio to late.
00:41:03Man, those weren't no chickens I've ever seen!
00:41:05Yeah, man, those chickens had teeth!
00:41:08That colonel totally stuffed some steroids down those chickens' necks.
00:41:15I mean, this is seriously the best trip I've ever been on.
00:41:23What?
00:41:26Okay, guys, we gotta get the hell out of here.
00:41:29Look, I didn't want to say anything, but I saw some really creepy shit up at old man Kane's attic.
00:41:37What kind of creepy shit?
00:41:39Don't spaz out on me. We need to get the hell out of here.
00:41:42Listen, I need for you to go to the truck and get my flashlight.
00:41:49Big guy. Gas cans. Can you handle it?
00:41:52Yeah, you got it.
00:41:54And I need for you to stay right here, where I can keep an eye on you.
00:42:07What the fuck?
00:42:26Hey, guys! Guys, I found the gas can!
00:42:32Hey, you guys with the lights on out there?
00:42:35You see the gas?
00:42:37I could probably use some light.
00:43:00Doors. I love the doors.
00:43:06Fuck!
00:43:09Fuck!
00:43:33Turn the lights back on!
00:43:38Fuck!
00:43:44Shit!
00:43:46I guess there is a deal with this.
00:44:09Fuck!
00:44:17No! Leave him alone!
00:44:24Fuck!
00:44:38What now?
00:45:08Fuck!
00:45:24Oh!
00:45:26That's what I'm talking about. Oh, my God.
00:45:29Oh, stop hugging. Kissing.
00:45:32There's not even any foreplay.
00:45:34What's foreplay?
00:45:36Oh, yeah. Exactly.
00:45:53Home sweet home. This place looks safe.
00:45:56You've been complaining since we left the convenience store,
00:45:58and all I've been doing is offering you my help.
00:46:00Oh, help?
00:46:02You know, if you think you can survive out there, then go.
00:46:04Get out of here.
00:46:06Fine. Fine. I'm done.
00:46:11Sheldon!
00:46:17Look.
00:46:19I really don't know what those things are out there,
00:46:22and I don't know why all this crazy shit is happening,
00:46:24but I do know one thing.
00:46:26We're a lot safer inside than we are out there.
00:46:30Okay. You're right.
00:46:35Ooh!
00:46:37Looks like someone's boyfriend's here.
00:46:48Well!
00:46:51I was just thinking about you.
00:46:55Maybe we can have a menage de deux-trois.
00:47:00A menage de deux-trois.
00:47:13Help me!
00:47:29Help!
00:47:59Let's get the hell out of here!
00:48:29Let's go!
00:48:31Let's go!
00:48:56If you keep doing that, girl, you're gonna wear that little coochie out.
00:48:59Let that little boy jump on down in there.
00:49:02Mm-hmm. That's just cod. That's cod.
00:49:04That ain't cute at all.
00:49:06Get around that little bad-ass boy.
00:49:08You really need to get some.
00:49:10I want to make love with you again. Let's go.
00:49:12I'm sorry.
00:49:14Ooh! Ooh! Ooh!
00:49:16Wait a minute.
00:49:18You look like a pit bull playing friends with a rhino.
00:49:20Hold on now, Mr. Dog.
00:49:22Mr. Dog, I'm just trying to go to the bathroom.
00:49:25It's up to you.
00:49:30No!
00:49:32No!
00:49:43No, no, no! I gotta use the bathroom!
00:49:45I ain't got time to be messing with you!
00:49:47You use the bathroom out there,
00:49:49I'm really gonna use the bathroom in here!
00:49:53In fact, you better shut up!
00:50:00Who is there?
00:50:06I said go away!
00:50:08There's a witness in here!
00:50:12There's a witness in here!
00:50:18Ah! Ah!
00:50:20Ah! Ah!
00:50:22Ah! Ah!
00:50:24Ah! Ah!
00:50:26Ah! Ah!
00:50:28Ah!
00:50:30Yes!
00:50:32Yes!
00:50:34Yes!
00:50:36Yes! Yes!
00:50:38Yes! Wait, no.
00:50:40No, wait, no.
00:50:42No, no.
00:50:44Yes! Yes!
00:50:46Yes! Yes!
00:50:48I'm gonna have to call somebody.
00:50:50Tell them what?
00:50:52I just set a new world record for Lucas, baby.
00:50:54And I've been going for what now?
00:50:56I don't know, 15, 20 minutes.
00:50:58It's a thing.
00:51:00We're just getting started.
00:51:02Ah, yes.
00:51:06What was that?
00:51:12Sorry, that was me.
00:51:14I mean, God, 20 minutes.
00:51:18It's my turn now.
00:51:20Attica.
00:51:26Ah!
00:51:56Ah!
00:52:02Ah!
00:52:08Ah!
00:52:10Ah!
00:52:24Ah!
00:52:34Ah!
00:52:40Ah!
00:53:04Ah!
00:53:06Ah!
00:53:10Ah!
00:53:18Ah!
00:53:40This is pretty safe to say that after what happened to your boss back there,
00:53:43you don't have to go into work tomorrow.
00:53:45If that thing catches up to us,
00:53:47we're all gonna be on a permanent leave of absence.
00:53:52Didn't you say something about seeing something strange up in the guy's attic?
00:53:56I mean, did you happen to come up with some kind of explanation
00:53:58about how creatures that have been extinct for millions of years
00:54:00have all of a sudden come back to life
00:54:02and are chasing our asses all over the place?
00:54:04Don't blame me for all of this.
00:54:05If it's anybody's fault, it's yours!
00:54:07My fault? How is it my fault?
00:54:10You know what? If it wasn't for you, I'd be sitting at home right now.
00:54:13The last time I checked, it was my house that got destroyed.
00:54:16You know what? My little fat friend is dead because of all of this.
00:54:19And when I say little, I don't mean little.
00:54:21I'm talking about 400 pounds of citrus soda, snowballs, and nachos just ripped apart.
00:54:26By what?
00:54:27A blue dinosaur.
00:54:28Bluezilla!
00:54:30Shh.
00:54:42Where did you come from?
00:55:01Ah!
00:55:03No. No! We did not come all the way back to the same place!
00:55:07We went in a complete circle!
00:55:08Sheldon, let's go!
00:55:30What?
00:55:34What?
00:55:49What?
00:56:00What?
00:56:10I could have shot your balls off.
00:56:21Shut your friend up.
00:56:23Right now!
00:56:27Lucas! Lucas!
00:56:29Look at me! Look at me!
00:56:30Truthy-looking, turkey-ball-headed, long-snout, monkey-ostrich bastards!
00:56:34We should really call somebody, bro.
00:56:36We can call the cops!
00:56:37There ain't no cops in this town.
00:56:48Okay. Let's go back to our original plan.
00:56:52Get on the bus.
00:56:54Get the hell out of here.
00:57:00Go, go, go, go, go.
00:57:08Go! Do it!
00:57:10All right.
00:57:11Sorry.
00:57:12I can't just look when this thing works!
00:57:17Okay, okay, okay.
00:57:18I've had a really, really bad day with cars today.
00:57:21So get on mine.
00:57:22Back up.
00:57:23Who is this girl?
00:57:24Who does she think she is?
00:57:25Start the car!
00:57:29Okay.
00:57:47Excuse me!
00:57:48We're leaving my mom's car.
00:57:50We're leaving it behind.
00:57:51What am I going to do?
00:57:53Either I'm going to be killed by the dinosaurs,
00:57:55or my mom's going to kill me.
00:57:57It doesn't matter.
00:57:58We're all going to die.
00:57:59Thank you, Miss Sunshine.
00:58:00You help me a lot.
00:58:02That's a dark road, and I don't want to go down it.
00:58:05Where are we going?
00:58:07We're going through downtown Fossil Ridge.
00:58:09We're hitting the interstate.
00:58:11Which way do you want to go?
00:58:13Left or right?
00:58:15I don't care.
00:58:20That's east or west?
00:58:22East.
00:58:23The girls in Cali are smoking skunks.
00:58:26Shut up, Lucas.
00:58:27Let's just get the hell out of here, man.
00:58:30Idiot.
00:58:41Oh, that's perfect.
00:58:42I love the smell of burning angels.
00:58:45I told you I was a piece of shit.
00:58:57Perfect!
00:59:00You know, it's a story of my life.
00:59:02It really is.
00:59:03I mean, I could have stayed at school,
00:59:04done some extracurricular activities.
00:59:06No.
00:59:07I had to go skiing with Jerk-Off here,
00:59:09and now I'm out in the middle of nowhere with bossy peeps.
00:59:13Sheriff, would you do us all a favor
00:59:15and make yourself useful
00:59:17and shut the back door?
00:59:19You know what, Mrs. Commando?
00:59:20I am not the only soldier in this army here.
00:59:23Why don't you ask one of them two to do something for once?
00:59:25I'm sick of this!
00:59:28What?
00:59:30Kill them!
00:59:32Do it!
00:59:35Okay!
00:59:38Are you happy?
00:59:55No!
01:00:26No!
01:00:39What the hell?
01:00:56Go!
01:01:04Get out! Get out!
01:01:06Go! Go! Go!
01:01:13Sheldon! Sheldon!
01:01:15Sheldon!
01:01:19Go! Go! Go! Go!
01:01:26Open it! Open it!
01:01:43This place is so creepy.
01:01:46I kind of feel at home here.
01:01:49That's what I'm talking about right there.
01:01:52I think we're going to be safe for right now.
01:02:03Why don't you go try the back door?
01:02:07Lucas?
01:02:19Okay.
01:02:20We've done that one.
01:02:21It's not there.
01:02:23And then...
01:02:26That don't sound like any pretty rabbit we've had before.
01:02:49No!
01:03:14God!
01:03:15God!
01:03:22Lucas!
01:03:25Ski buddy!
01:03:28Lucas!
01:03:29Lucas!
01:03:30Lucas!
01:03:45Lucas!
01:03:47No!
01:03:49No!
01:04:16No!
01:04:18No!
01:04:34You want the bone?
01:04:35Come and get it!
01:04:37You like bones!
01:04:38Bones are good!
01:04:40You want the bone?
01:04:42Well, I'm going to protect you, bitch!
01:04:45You even like the bone?
01:04:49Do it!
01:04:57I said do it.
01:04:59And he did it.
01:05:02He did it.
01:05:12Sheldon, are you okay?
01:05:13Sheldon!
01:05:15Lucas, you are on the inside!
01:05:16Sheldon's on the outside!
01:05:17Open the door!
01:05:18Open the door!
01:05:21Dumbass.
01:05:34There he goes again.
01:05:47Oh no!
01:05:55Looks like trouble followed us into town.
01:05:58It's the blue one!
01:05:59It's the blue one!
01:06:10I'm putting my money on the big one.
01:06:11No, no.
01:06:12Forget the big one.
01:06:13It's the small one that can get us.
01:06:14The blue one.
01:06:15How can you say forget the big one?
01:06:16He just flipped the bus.
01:06:17Lucas, for once in your life,
01:06:18size doesn't matter, man.
01:06:20What are you talking about?
01:06:22Pen Beast.
01:06:24Pen Beast?
01:06:25What happened?
01:06:27Remember seventh grade football?
01:06:30Vaguely.
01:06:31Eighteen yard sprint.
01:06:33Yeah?
01:06:35No.
01:06:36No.
01:06:37I don't know, man.
01:06:38We were running for the truck
01:06:39and I looked behind me and he wasn't there.
01:06:42How does 370 pounds just up and disappear?
01:06:44I don't know.
01:06:45He just wasn't there.
01:06:46I think he went around to the front
01:06:47of the doctor's house and...
01:06:51Flamingos.
01:06:53Not the flamingos.
01:06:55Say it ain't so.
01:06:57He chose that blue thing
01:06:59over the flamingos.
01:07:03I mean, there were just body parts
01:07:04flying all over the place.
01:07:07Please.
01:07:09Just drink.
01:07:11Okay.
01:07:13Blue.
01:07:18Probably a Megasaurus.
01:07:21A large, well advanced
01:07:24carnivorous
01:07:27of the Tyrannosaurus family.
01:07:33They're not sure about the color.
01:07:37Until now.
01:07:39Lived for about 70 million years.
01:07:42Middle Jurassic period.
01:07:43All grew enough to be a teenager
01:07:45because they grew up to be 30 feet.
01:07:55Does it say in the book
01:07:56how to kill the things?
01:07:57No.
01:08:00But it says that it was probably
01:08:03a matriarch.
01:08:06A matriarch!
01:08:08A matriarch?
01:08:13What's a matriarch?
01:08:15That means females are in charge.
01:08:21Oh, hell no.
01:08:22I ain't putting up with this shit.
01:08:24Now get me that gun.
01:08:39This is what I'm talking about.
01:08:46That armor's not going to protect you, Lucas.
01:08:48Chill.
01:08:49When are you going to grow up and be a man?
01:08:51Honestly, let's put our skis together,
01:08:53get off the bunny slopes,
01:08:54get on the big boy chair,
01:08:55and we're going to go
01:08:56to the top of that mountain.
01:08:57Why do we even go to the top of the mountain?
01:08:59For titties.
01:09:00The whole point,
01:09:01the whole objectives of this whole trip
01:09:03was to do what?
01:09:04Get some titties.
01:09:05The whole objectives of this whole trip
01:09:07was to do what?
01:09:08Get a titty here and a titty here.
01:09:09And I'm not going to let some little lizard out there
01:09:11stop me from getting titties.
01:09:13Why?
01:09:14Because I'm the titty man.
01:09:17The big one's interested in the little baby boy.
01:09:19The matriarchial dinosaur.
01:09:21So now is our chance, alright?
01:09:23Besides, they're extinct and they're stupid.
01:09:25We're human.
01:09:26We're men human.
01:09:27We're smarter.
01:09:28Lucas.
01:09:29What?
01:09:30You walk through that door and you'll be extinct.
01:09:31What do you know?
01:09:32It's you and your dumbass boyfriend's fault
01:09:33we're here in the first place.
01:09:34Lucas, get back in here, man!
01:09:36You need to make up your mind.
01:09:37You gonna listen to a robo-bitch here
01:09:39or romance at party one?
01:09:42It's me, Lucas.
01:09:44Your friend.
01:09:45Your pal.
01:09:46Your amigo.
01:09:49What are you gonna do with a BB gun, Lucas?
01:09:51I'm gonna take his eye out.
01:09:56Ski buddy.
01:10:04Oh, God!
01:10:30Sorry about your friend.
01:10:35Lucas!
01:10:39What are you doing?
01:10:42I am fishing.
01:11:01What?
01:11:03I don't know.
01:11:05But I got one.
01:11:32No!
01:12:02Where is it?
01:12:32Come on!
01:12:45Help me!
01:12:50Come on!
01:12:51You can do it! Come on!
01:13:03Lucas!
01:13:08Come on!
01:13:09Come on!
01:13:33We should go back in here.
01:13:36Hell no!
01:13:37I'm not gonna become a Jurassic snack pack.
01:14:02Come on!
01:14:32Come on!
01:15:02Come on!
01:15:33Come on!
01:15:41Maybe we'll be safe in here.
01:15:45There's no way in hell she can figure out how to get in here.
01:16:02Come on!
01:16:32Come on!
01:17:02Come on!
01:17:03Come on!
01:17:33This is it.
01:17:37This is how the story ends.
01:17:41There's only two of us left.
01:17:47One of us has gotta go.
01:17:52It's gonna be me.
01:17:57Hey.
01:17:59I guess I've been pretty hard on you.
01:18:03No!
01:18:21No!
01:18:22No!
01:18:33No!
01:18:43Help me!
01:19:02Help me!
01:19:32No!
01:20:02No!
01:20:03No!
01:20:04No!
01:20:05No!
01:20:06No!
01:20:07No!
01:20:08No!
01:20:09No!
01:20:10No!
01:20:11No!
01:20:12No!
01:20:13No!
01:20:14No!
01:20:15No!
01:20:16No!
01:20:17No!
01:20:18No!
01:20:19No!
01:20:20No!
01:20:21No!
01:20:22No!
01:20:23No!
01:20:24No!
01:20:25No!
01:20:26No!
01:20:27No!
01:20:28No!
01:20:29No!
01:20:30No!
01:20:31No!
01:20:32No!
01:20:33No!
01:20:34No!
01:20:35No!
01:20:36No!
01:20:37No!
01:20:38No!
01:20:39No!
01:20:40No!
01:20:47He's alive.
01:20:49Where?
01:20:52You're okay.
01:20:54What did you do?
01:20:56Kay.
01:20:59Kay.
01:21:01♪♪
01:21:07-♪♪
01:21:14-♪♪
01:21:22Thanks, Mom.
01:21:24-♪♪
01:21:31This is for you, Mom.
01:21:33-♪♪
01:21:43It's you and me, bitch.
01:21:45-♪♪
01:21:55-♪♪
01:22:01Go to hell.
01:22:03-♪♪
01:22:13-♪♪
01:22:19Yo, what was that, man?
01:22:21Was that...
01:22:23Was that an earthquake or something?
01:22:25No.
01:22:26No, not really.
01:22:27Not here.
01:22:28That was an explosion.
01:22:29Come on.
01:22:30Let's go check it out.
01:22:32-♪♪
01:22:42-♪♪
01:22:55Hey, guys.
01:22:56We got quite a mess on our hands.
01:22:58What was that explosion?
01:22:59The old factory.
01:23:01Nothing compared to what they found
01:23:02at Fossil Ridge this morning.
01:23:04Remains of...
01:23:06I know this sounds crazy,
01:23:08but those ostriches,
01:23:10they weren't ostriches at all.
01:23:12They were what seemed to be dinosaurs.
01:23:14The real big ones.
01:23:16Where's Morgan?
01:23:17He's got Abby,
01:23:18the daughter of one of the possible victims.
01:23:20Looks like Abby's the only surviving witness.
01:23:22They're just up the road.
01:23:24There's a whole lot of media up there.
01:23:26Thanks.
01:23:29-♪♪
01:23:34Is it true that dinosaur-like creatures
01:23:36have been seen in the area?
01:23:37This isn't Jurassic Park.
01:23:39Get real, people.
01:23:40Just mutated, featherless ostriches
01:23:42that attack these poor folks.
01:23:43Why don't you guys go look for Bigfoot or something?
01:23:45No more questions for now.
01:23:47-♪♪
01:23:53That's how it happened.
01:23:55I told my story to the FBI,
01:23:57but they didn't believe me.
01:23:59Seems the government officials
01:24:00don't take to the mad ravings of a native girl.
01:24:03I guess they'd rather write off such incidents
01:24:05to flesh-eating emus or the chupacabra.
01:24:09Anyway, eventually they released me,
01:24:11and guess what?
01:24:13I took old Doc Kane's advice.
01:24:15I didn't give up on my dream or my future,
01:24:18but I did give up on my past.
01:24:21-♪♪
01:24:26-♪♪
01:24:31-♪♪
01:24:36-♪♪
01:24:41-♪♪
01:24:46-♪♪
01:24:51-♪♪
01:24:56-♪♪
01:25:01-♪♪
01:25:06-♪♪
01:25:11-♪♪
01:25:16-♪♪
01:25:21-♪♪
01:25:26-♪♪
01:25:31-♪♪
01:25:36-♪♪
01:25:41-♪♪
01:25:46-♪♪
01:25:51-♪♪
01:25:56-♪♪
01:26:01-♪♪
01:26:06-♪♪
01:26:11-♪♪
01:26:16-♪♪
01:26:21-♪♪
01:26:26-♪♪
01:26:31-♪♪
01:26:36-♪♪
01:26:41-♪♪
01:26:46-♪♪
01:26:51-♪♪
01:26:56-♪♪
01:27:01-♪♪
01:27:06-♪♪
01:27:11-♪♪
01:27:16-♪♪
01:27:21-♪♪
01:27:26-♪♪
01:27:31-♪♪
01:27:36-♪♪
01:27:41-♪♪
01:27:46-♪♪
01:27:51-♪♪
01:27:56-♪♪
01:28:01-♪♪
01:28:06-♪♪