• 2 months ago
#loveincoldclimate #byron #bethfreed25 https://dailymotion.com/bethfreed25
As Louisa's coming out ball approaches, Fanny and Linda grow impatient for their own.
Transcript
01:00The main result of Aunt Emily's marriage to Davy Warbeck, apart from an enormous change
01:09for the better in her clothes, was that I now spent all my holidays parked at Alconley
01:13while he carried her off abroad.
01:16Goodbye, Aunt Davy.
01:18Goodbye.
01:19Goodbye.
01:20Goodbye.
01:21Goodbye.
01:22Goodbye.
01:23Goodbye.
01:24Goodbye.
01:25Goodbye.
01:26Goodbye.
01:27Goodbye.
01:28Goodbye.
01:29Bye, Aunt Emily.
01:30What do you do if Uncle Matthew won't get across?
01:33I sometimes wonder whether it's good for Fanny to be quite so much in Matthew's house.
01:37No.
01:38Nonsense darling.
01:39Only a silly crybaby would be upset by that terrible old cardboard ogre.
01:44And Fanny is not a crybaby.
01:51Bye darling.
01:55Bye.
01:57Bye.
01:58Aunt Emily probably felt that if she had to choose between her husband's wishes and my nervous system
02:04her husband's wishes should win the day.
02:08I hope I don't have to wait until I'm 40.
02:11Scoring time darling. Me first.
02:15Well your scores so far are even better than last holiday's.
02:19Mine are worse.
02:21Wrists, ankles, neck and bust. You've beaten me hollow on all of them.
02:25Now then.
02:2718 inches from knee to ankle.
02:30I read somewhere that Venus measured 18 inches from knee to ankle.
02:34How much did she measure from the knee going the other way?
02:36The book didn't say.
02:38I expect the book thought it rude to tell one that about a goddess.
02:40Venus wouldn't have minded.
02:42She was rather a rude goddess.
02:44Goddess of love?
02:46There's some very odd stories.
02:50Very funny too.
02:52Love isn't meant to be funny.
02:54It's meant to lead to romance and marriage
02:56and to last forever and ever
02:58and to go on to the grave and ever so far beyond.
03:00Do admit.
03:02Yes I do admit Linda.
03:04But all the same there are several different sides to love.
03:08And some of them are funny.
03:10Or rude.
03:12You mean it.
03:14I can see that it might seem a teeny bit rude at first.
03:18I mean taking one's things off.
03:20I wonder
03:22can it be funny too?
03:24If you're in love Fanny.
03:26Not just lecherous like boy Dugdale the lecturer
03:28but really and truly in love.
03:32Because if you're in love
03:34it is meant to be so marvellous and sort of sacred
03:38that it can't be funny.
03:40Perhaps it doesn't seem funny to one
03:44but it might to other people.
03:46I mean just think what Bob finally found out that Oscar Wilde got up to.
03:50That wasn't love Fanny.
03:52Strictly not romantic.
03:54Bob said it was to Oscar Wilde.
03:56At any rate it was his way of doing it.
03:58Oh how confusing it all is.
04:02Oh bother.
04:04I thought this was going to come out.
04:06When it does come out perfectly Fanny
04:08if I haven't cheated
04:10then I shall fall in love.
04:12Only I've got to wait for ages and ages anyway
04:14until we come out let alone the patients.
04:16Perhaps it'll happen before then.
04:18Perhaps it'll happen at Louisa's coming out ball.
04:20Now I want you all to listen to my list.
04:22Pay attention Louisa.
04:24It's your ball.
04:26And you too Matthew.
04:28It's your daughter.
04:30Now it goes without saying that all our neighbours will be invited.
04:32Come one come all.
04:34The difficult question is which of them should be asked to bring a house party.
04:36It beats me why people can't stay in their own homes.
04:38I always do.
04:40Perfectly good food here.
04:42Perfectly clean sheets.
04:44Please Matthew.
04:46After long thought I've decided that the following should be asked to bring house parties.
04:48Now in alphabetical order.
04:50Why all this fuss? I've never known you carry on like this before.
04:52Please Matthew.
04:54In alphabetical order.
04:56Brigadier General and Mrs. Bateson.
04:58Major and Mrs. Jackson.
05:00Sir Thomas and Nellie Lulworth.
05:02Lord Merlin.
05:04Now that is going too far.
05:06Merlin real sure.
05:08Fellow who prints up his dogs in diamonds.
05:10Builds fancy gazebos like transparent knocking shops all over his park.
05:12A theatre Matthew is all Lord Merlin has built.
05:14All right what does he do with it?
05:16Fills it with huge orchestras.
05:18Playing beastly squealing modern music.
05:20Not splendid tunes like Thora.
05:22And then spends millions of pounds on filthy foreign pictures.
05:24Not like these.
05:26No not like these.
05:28Watto's I'm told.
05:30Lord Merlin is a man of elegance Matthew.
05:32And if he's asked to bring a house party it will be decorative and distinguished.
05:34Everyone else who comes will be utterly and unrelievably dowdy.
05:36And I long just for once.
05:38I do long.
05:40To look upon young women with properly dressed hair.
05:42London complexions and Paris clothes.
05:44If you ask that hog Merlin to bring his friends.
05:46I wouldn't put it past him to bring some foreigners.
05:48I hear he sometimes has frogs and even wops to stay with him.
05:50I will not have my house filled up with wops.
05:52Dear Lord Merlin.
05:54We're having a little dance for Louisa on the 13th of next month.
05:56And I should be so pleased if you bring over a party from Merlinford.
05:58You're not going to send that.
06:00No Matthew I'm not going to send it.
06:02As I knew what your reaction would be.
06:04I'm not going to send it.
06:06I'm not going to send it.
06:08I'm not going to send it.
06:10No I'm not going to send it.
06:12As I knew what your reaction would be.
06:14I have already sent it.
06:16This is only a copy.
06:32Linda's and my dresses.
06:34White taffeta with floating panels and embroidered bead bells.
06:36Were being made by Mrs. Josh.
06:38The wife of the head groom.
06:40There Miss Linda.
06:42You'll do.
06:44Now Miss Francis.
06:46You won't be quite as easy to turn out presentable.
06:48Oh thank you Mrs. Josh.
06:50Thank you for being so clever.
06:54Oh isn't it lovely to be lovely me.
06:56Now don't go getting over excited.
07:00Oh Louisa.
07:02Well now.
07:04You can tell that that wasn't run up in somebody's back parlor.
07:06You'll be the belle of your own ball Miss Louisa love.
07:10I came especially to show you Mrs. Josh.
07:12And to say that although this is so lovely.
07:14It's not quite the same as the dresses you used to make for me.
07:16Because.
07:18Well.
07:20Just because.
07:22Oh see how lovely Fanny and Linda look in theirs.
07:28Time to take them off and to the ball.
07:30Yours too Louisa.
07:32They will have to look out something else nice for you to wear on Friday.
07:34Friday?
07:36Yes I've had such a pleasant letter from Lord Merlin.
07:38You know his reputation for little jokes and tricks.
07:40When I opened it I half expected a jack-in-the-box to leap out and get me on the nose.
07:44But it's really quite normal.
07:46Except there's a picture of Merlin at the top.
07:48And his telegraphic address is Neighbour Tees.
07:52Yes but don't tell Far.
07:54He doesn't like that kind of thing.
07:56He says he's going to bring a party of twelve.
07:58And he'll present their names to you presently.
08:00It's all very correct I must say.
08:02And he's asked you and me and Far to luncheon with him.
08:06On Friday.
08:08Yes well of course your father won't go
08:10but I don't see why you and I shouldn't have a delighting.
08:12Oh it is unfair.
08:14Why can't Fanny and I come?
08:16For the same reason as your dresses are still being made by me.
08:20Oh I do long and long and long to be grown up.
08:22Just you wait.
08:32Come on.
08:40Lord Merlin was a famous collector.
08:42So avid that a well-known antique dealer
08:44from St James's had found it worth his while
08:46to open a branch in the tiny town of Merlinford.
08:50Simply to tempt his lordship with choice objects
08:52during his morning walk.
08:54And was soon followed there by a Bond Street jeweller.
09:02Oh
09:22It's so warm.
09:24Like everywhere else in the house.
09:26Even the lamp was warm as toast.
09:28They do say too much warmth is unhealthy.
09:30Look at all Merlin's got.
09:32Oh heavenly smells.
09:34Just like the young man
09:36I sat next to at luncheon.
09:38Oh they look so good.
09:40Merlin calls them Apollo
09:42and Hyacinth.
09:44Hyacinth?
09:46But they both smell.
09:48Hyacinth was a boy's name Lady Alkinley.
09:50Oh.
09:52Unusual.
09:54Apollo thought so too.
09:56Pretty birdies.
09:58What are you doing outside?
10:00Merlin dyes the pigeons all the colours of the rainbow.
10:02They're dried in the linen cupboard.
10:04But isn't that frightfully cruel?
10:06Oh no.
10:08They love to look at each other
10:10and they tumble about in the sky just like confetti.
10:12You ought to think about going home.
10:14Goodbye.
10:16Have you seen Lord Merlin anywhere?
10:18He's just coming.
10:20He's got a lovely new surprise for us all.
10:22Oh Lord Merlin.
10:24Louisa and I really...
10:28...
10:30321.
10:32The precise moment
10:34of my birth.
10:38It's all done by electricity Lady Alkinley.
10:40I've had the broadcasting machine
10:42installed in the folly
10:44and a gold figure of the angel Gabriel mounted on the roof.
10:46The angel Gabriel?
10:48Yes, playing that acclamation on his trumpet.
10:50Every day it's going to happen precisely
10:52at 321.
10:54The moment of my gilded
10:56and purple birth.
10:58Oh come, come Lord Merlin. We bring nothing with us into this world you know.
11:00No.
11:02But for some of us, plenty is waiting.
11:04And all this happened
11:06at 321. You say high time
11:08Louisa and I went there.
11:10Oh, beautiful buttons.
11:12Do tell me
11:14where you all hunt.
11:16Dear me, we don't hunt.
11:18Then why do you wear pink coats?
11:20Because we think they're so pretty.
11:26Nobody want to come to your dance?
11:28All the women in England.
11:30No men.
11:32Why no men?
11:34Too busy, too sought after.
11:36Too pampered.
11:38It's a pretty Montaur isn't he? He'd come along
11:40and help you out.
11:42Can't expect him to come from India though.
11:44He hasn't any boys, only Polly.
11:46Jassie and I could dress up as boys.
11:48You won't be there.
11:50How far?
11:52Too young.
11:54The fewer that come the better.
11:56That sewer Merlin and his mob of greenery
11:58yallery boys.
12:00Ain't that enough?
12:12What's the matter?
12:14Do you really mean to say you want more men?
12:16Yes, Matthew. There must be
12:18someone for at least some of the girls
12:20to dance with.
12:22That's what's been upsetting you?
12:24Yes.
12:26I thought it was the prospect of some young brute making up to Louisa.
12:28Upsets me, I can tell you.
12:30If you're going to make yourself ill about not having enough men
12:32then more men you shall have.
12:34But where shall you find them?
12:36London. You know I can't stand the place.
12:38But even less can I stand
12:40having you looking so dark.
12:42Thank you, Matthew.
12:44Time to take steps.
12:46I'll be off to London this very day.
12:48Drum up some blightly fellows.
13:00All right, Matthew.
13:02We undertake to be on parade
13:04for dinner at the beginning of the ball
13:06and to walk through
13:08five dances each.
13:10Except me.
13:12You can hardly expect me to stand up for five dances
13:14but I will positively sit there
13:16in the ballroom.
13:18Five dances each then, Bridge.
13:20A table set up in a room by itself.
13:22And we want our own drinks.
13:24None of that champagne stuff for the ball.
13:26Whiskey. Brandy.
13:28And liqueurs.
13:30And six bottles of my blood as well, I should say.
13:32Anything else?
13:34Yes. We'll have a shoot the next day.
13:36And a car to take me into the Bodleian and back.
13:38Yes.
13:40That means we'll have to stay another night.
13:42So we'll have someone that tailors
13:4486 of yours after dinner.
13:50This then was a ball.
13:52This then was a ball.
14:18This then was a ball.
14:20This was life.
14:22What we had been waiting for all these years.
14:24Here we were.
14:26And here it was.
14:28A ball.
14:30For men so old and ugly.
14:32The women so frosty.
14:34Their clothes so messy and their faces so red.
14:36The oil stove so smelly
14:38and not in the least warm.
14:40Above all the men.
14:42Come on, Fort William.
14:44Time for Bridge.
14:46Oh, I did rather think
14:48another dance.
14:50What nonsense. You dance much longer at your age.
14:52Something will snap.
14:54Oh, Bridge.
15:02I was going to watch you for the next one, Fanny.
15:04God knows it's your turn.
15:06But as Louisa's been so cruelly deserted
15:08by Fort William and as it is her ball.
15:10You do see, don't you?
15:12Excuse me.
15:18Oh.
15:26They balance like King's talk on one leg
15:28and with the other they come down on one's toe
15:30like King Log.
15:32Not Davey.
15:34Even Davey.
15:38Perhaps it's because we never learnt.
15:48Lord Merlin.
15:58Lord Merlin.
16:06It's a miracle.
16:08How true. Too heavenly for words.
16:10Well, Fanny, do admit.
16:18Come on.
16:26What's going on?
16:28He's up to something.
16:30One of his famous jokes.
16:32It's frightfully suspicious.
16:34Here he comes.
16:40One, two, three, four.
16:48Oh.
17:02Oh. Oh, how quite devastating.
17:04Oh, Fanny, I must be like them.
17:06I must live the way they do forever and ever.
17:08I don't think it would quite suit me.
17:10I can introduce you both, if you like.
17:12I know Merlin and some of the rest.
17:14No, we're too dowdy to let you.
17:16We're too dowdy to let you.
17:18This is George's old dress.
17:20What, again?
17:22Yes, soon.
17:46Excuse me.
17:48Excuse me.
17:50Excuse me.
17:52Excuse me.
17:54Excuse me.
17:56Excuse me.
17:58Excuse me.
18:00Excuse me.
18:02Come back at one spot, will you?
18:16There!
18:38Brutal thing.
18:40You unset it, Fanny.
18:42You're more handy.
18:44I'll keep watch.
18:50Gotcha both!
18:52Miss Linder, Miss Francis,
18:54how can I keep a proper head of game
18:56with you two up to your tricks?
18:58You old enough to know better.
19:00I'll be reporting you to His Lordship.
19:02By all the rules in the book,
19:04you are to be sent to bed for a week on bread and water.
19:06But you're too old for that.
19:08Just.
19:10In any case,
19:12something rather special has happened,
19:14in honour of which
19:16your mother has asked me to
19:18drop all charges.
19:26Your sister, Louisa,
19:30we've just had a wire
19:32from Fort William's mother's place
19:34in Sussex.
19:36They're engaged.
19:38Engaged?
19:40Louisa and old lady Fort William?
19:42Don't you be pert with me, Miss.
19:44Louisa's going to marry John Fort William.
19:46Might just as well be his mother.
19:48They're both well over a hundred and fifty far,
19:50do admit.
19:52Lord Fort William is thirty-nine years old.
19:54He'll be a damn sight better for your sister
19:56than some beastly young wart who's still wetting his breeches.
19:58In any way,
20:00you'll be grateful she's got engaged when she has.
20:02If she hadn't,
20:04I'd have mined to whip the pair of you.
20:06If we're too old for bread and water,
20:08then we're too old for whipping.
20:10I wouldn't bet your Sunday best
20:12on that, Miss.
20:14Now, off with you.
20:20Miss Fanny, I want a word with you.
20:26Craven tells me you didn't so much as squeak
20:28when you fell foul of that trap.
20:30Good. Just like your mother.
20:32I'm not sure I want to be like my mother.
20:34Well, you don't want to
20:36romp about with the men,
20:38as she does, that's for sure.
20:40But remember, there are a lot of good things
20:42about the boulter.
20:44She sits on a horse like a...
20:46What are the names of those damn women?
20:48Like an Amazon.
20:50Amazons. Yes, that's it.
20:52And she'd fight like one, too,
20:54if it came to it.
20:56I can just see her swatting one of those Greek chappies
20:58with her sword.
21:00She didn't get too inquisitive
21:02about what sort of form the fellow had
21:04when he was revealed.
21:08Poor old thing.
21:12I suppose she likes him.
21:14But I must say,
21:16if John Fort William was one's dog,
21:18one would have to have him put down.
21:20You're envious.
21:22You'd go off with him yourself like a bullet.
21:24If he'd asked you.
21:26Only he hasn't. He's asked Louisa.
21:28We must get her to tell us all about it
21:30as soon as she comes home.
21:32So you're actually married?
21:34I fail to see why not.
21:36Well, anyway, Louisa won't.
21:38I don't imagine
21:40they'll do it even then.
21:42He's far too decrepit.
21:44His hair looks as if
21:46it's slipping off like an eidolon in the night.
21:48How would you feel
21:50if you were doing it
21:52and then your husband's hair fell off
21:54all over the bed?
22:02At this moment,
22:04I think Linda would gladly
22:06have changed places with Louisa.
22:08Even at the cost,
22:10the heavy cost,
22:12of being happy forever after
22:14with John Fort William.
22:16Dearly beloved,
22:18we are gathered together here
22:20in the sight of God
22:22and in the face of this congregation
22:24and in the face of this church
22:26and in the face of this church
22:28and in the face of this church
22:30and in the face of this congregation
22:32to join together this man...
22:34Louisa was to have two houses.
22:36One in London, Cornwall Square,
22:38and one in Scotland.
22:40First, it was ordained
22:42for the procreation of children.
22:44Her dress allowance would be 300 a year.
22:48Secondly, it was ordained
22:50for a remedy against sin
22:52and to avoid...
22:54She would possess a diamond tiara, a pearl necklace.
22:56But such persons as have not the gift
22:58of continency might marry.
23:00A motor car of her own,
23:02probably two.
23:04Squadrons of servants and a fine fur cape.
23:08You should have gone before we left.
23:10You know what Lucille always says.
23:12Wilt thou have this man
23:14to thy wedded husband
23:16to live together
23:18after God's ordinance
23:20in the holy estate of matrimony?
23:24I will.
23:26A very enviable one.
23:28Granted that she could bear John Fort William.
23:32At last the heart
23:34for whom it sings
23:38When he dead
23:40in the chase
23:44So longs
23:46my soul
23:48O God
23:50for me
23:52And I
23:54I
23:56with rest
23:58embrace
24:00For me
24:02my God
24:04the living God
24:08My thirsty
24:10soul
24:12of mine
24:16It's a shame.
24:18In the middle of Louisa's favourite hymn.
24:20Do have a little bit of pity.
24:22Where are you going?
24:24Over there, behind the box tomb.
24:26I only hope great uncle Matthew doesn't get up out of it and haunt you.
24:28Is she alright?
24:30Where is she?
24:32Going to the bathroom on great uncle Matthew.
24:38Pull yourself together Davy.
24:40Deep breath.
24:42Begin.
24:44In. Out.
24:46In.
24:48Out.
24:50I've twisted my tonsil singing.
24:52In.
24:54And out.
24:56In. And out.
24:58You may return to the service ladies.
25:00Captain Warbeck is out of danger.
25:02And Mrs Warbeck and I can deal with him.
25:06Really too shaming Jassy.
25:08What should I tell people?
25:10You will find that no one will even mention it if you don't.
25:16In and out Davy.
25:18I'm not sure I haven't ruptured my tonsil now.
25:20All that heavy breathing you made me do.
25:22Nonsense. It's the only cure.
25:24In.
25:26And out.
25:28Merlin's so heartless.
25:30Please trust me Mrs Warbeck.
25:32In.
25:34And out.
25:36No sympathy.
25:38In.
25:42And out.
25:44No pity.
25:48Then Louisa went away.
25:50And the wedding guests departed from Alkenley.
25:52And I was taken off to Aunt Emily's house and back to school.
25:56This of course was the time when Linda should have been made to work.
25:58With no time for silly dreaming.
26:00Aunt Sadie made suggestion after suggestion.
26:04That Linda should learn to cook.
26:06Should occupy herself in the garden.
26:08Should be prepared for confirmation.
26:10But Linda furiously refused.
26:12Nor would she do jobs in the village.
26:14Nor would she help her mother run the house.
26:16So that's why I sent for you.
26:18The trouble with you missy is that you're just thoroughly bloody minded.
26:24Yes.
26:26Alkenley speaking.
26:30Oh would you indeed.
26:32And when.
26:34That hog Merlin wants to speak to your mother.
26:36Something about luncheon next week.
26:38I should have given some froggy filth.
26:40Like slugs.
26:42You better go and get her.
26:44You better go and get her.
27:14No the girls don't go to school because Matthew doesn't believe in lessons.
27:18What?
27:20No lessons at all?
27:22No.
27:24My dear Linda.
27:26What do you do all day?
27:28Well she does have the occasional conversations with Lucille.
27:30That's the French governess we have for Victoria and Jassie and little Matt.
27:34Occasional conversations with Lucille?
27:36But Lucille's French.
27:38She tends to be well...
27:40Rather too idiomatic if you follow me.
27:42I follow you.
27:44So we have to be rather careful.
27:46Lucille's very funny.
27:48Sadie gets in a fudge because she uses words like Pat and Matt.
27:50At least she's not bloody boring like everyone else.
27:52Oh now duck.
27:54Now you listen to me Miss Linda.
27:56Oh by your leave Lady Alkenley.
28:00If you are bored
28:02it is not because other people are boring you
28:04but because you are boring yourself.
28:06Which is to say you are not making use of the
28:08plentiful wits and intelligence with which God has endowed you.
28:12So we must whip up
28:14the horses of your soul
28:16and give you a thorough mental scouring.
28:18Please don't mix your metaphors Lord Merlin.
28:20That's better.
28:22Proper criticism not mere rudeness.
28:24Now then we shall draw up a list of books
28:26for you to read
28:28and we shall take you your mother and I to see some well chosen pictures.
28:32Beginning with the ones in this house.
28:42Music
29:02Linda was quite clever enough to perceive that
29:04the world that she wanted to be in
29:06the witty sparkling world of Lord Merlin
29:08and his friends
29:10existed in the arts and things of the mind
29:12and that she would only be able to shine in it
29:14if she became in some way educated.
29:18And another thing
29:20please remember
29:22the arts are not merely for pleasure
29:24they provide consolation and philosophy
29:28sometimes even explanation as well
29:30when things go wrong.
29:32When what goes wrong?
29:36When love grows cold
29:38and there's a betrayal of heart and trust
29:42you'll see pretty Linda
29:44oh yes
29:48you of all people will see.
29:56All dressed up I see.
29:58Off in another of your art binges.
30:00We're going to the Ashmolean with Lord Merlin.
30:02Ah that's sure again.
30:04Well I must admit
30:06since he started you on this culture campaign
30:10some of us have been much more agreeable to live with.
30:14We're planning a little expedition to Stratford far
30:16to see a play.
30:20We thought you might like to come.
30:22Me? I haven't been in a theatre for
30:24twenty years.
30:26The old empire was more my mark.
30:28Nevertheless Matthew
30:30there's a play we think you might enjoy.
30:32Will thou be gone?
30:36It is not yet near day.
30:38It was the nightingale
30:40and not the lark
30:42that pierced the fearful hollow of thine ear.
30:46Nightly she sings on yon pomegranate tree.
30:50Believe me love
30:52it was the nightingale.
30:54It was the lark.
30:56The herald of the morn.
30:58No nightingales.
31:00Look love what envious streaks
31:02do lace the severing clouds in yonder east.
31:16It's all the fault of that damn fool of a padre
31:18mucking up his errand like that.
31:20That fellow, what's his name?
31:22Romeo.
31:24Ought to have known that a damn papist
31:26would mess the whole thing up.
31:28Silly old fool of a nurse too.
31:30Bet she was an arsey.
31:32Desmond old bitch.
31:34And as for that horrible sewer
31:36Capulet, he was a real wob.
31:38Yes Matthew darling.
31:40Emily writes that Fanny's last term
31:42at school ends on the 15th of next month.
31:44We shall have to think very carefully
31:46about the arrangements for her season
31:48in London with Linda.
31:50At last grown up.
31:52At last.
31:54At last grown up.
31:56At last.
31:58Oh isn't it lovely
32:00to be lovely grown up me.
32:02Not so fast miss.
32:04You needn't think you're grown up
32:06because you've been allowed to put your hair up
32:08and take a dancer to in London.
32:10You're grown up when you're 21
32:12or when you're married
32:14or when you can pay your own bills
32:16so don't start getting any ideas.
32:18I've been thinking about our ball
32:20for Fanny and Linda.
32:22Leastly balls.
32:24Down here again I think not in London.
32:26Oh well if we must.
32:28So long as you don't start upsetting yourself
32:30as you did over the last one.
32:32You needn't worry about that.
32:34I feel quite an old hand at it now.
32:36Besides Louisa will be a great help
32:38in providing a lot of young men.
32:40Those dreadfully dull Scottish boys she knows.
32:42Most of the girls who come
32:44will be dreadfully dull as well.
32:46You make the whole thing sound
32:48too impossibly dreary
32:50...
32:52...
32:54...
32:56...
32:58You've improved since last time.
33:00Linda and I have been taking dancing lessons.
33:02...
33:04...
33:06...
33:08That's it my friend.
33:10I must give Linda a turn.
33:12I think Linda's booked by one of Louisa's Scottish boys.
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37:32Come on.
37:36Come on.
37:37Come on.
37:38Come.
37:45There it is.
37:46Over there.
38:02Oh, it's just a calf.
38:32It was the one romantic gesture of Tony Krosig's life.
38:46He said he'd ring me when he got back to Oxford.
38:52Suppose it rings and I'm not there.
38:54Suppose it rings and you are there.
38:56What can you say in front of Uncle Matt?
38:58I'll pretend it's Lavender Davis.
39:02You know how dreary she is.
39:04That'll make it all sound respectable and put Far off his guard.
39:07Alkinley, Linda Radlet speaking.
39:15Just a moment, please.
39:19It's Lavender Davis.
39:22How exciting.
39:24I've been waiting to hear from her for days.
39:28Oh, I didn't know you cared that much.
39:31Dismal girl.
39:33Face like a carp.
39:35I can't stand being in the same room with her when she's talking.
39:39Even on that thing.
39:43Sorry, Lavender.
39:45Tony, I mean.
39:46I just had to sneeze.
39:50But I should never be allowed to.
39:54I should never be allowed to.
39:57He wants me to go to lunch in Oxford next Thursday.
40:00Lunch?
40:01Well, that's what he called it.
40:05But Tony, I shouldn't be able to come without Mummy or...
40:12He says that's all rot.
40:14And several girls are coming from London.
40:16And if I must bring someone, I can bring you if I like.
40:18I don't think I can't.
40:20I know.
40:21But I can't explain to him about Sadie and Far being so medieval.
40:25Oh, Fanny, darling.
40:27If I said yes, Far would kill us.
40:29Whatever shall I do?
40:31Say yes, or you'll die of it anyway.
40:38All right.
40:39Yes.
40:43He hasn't left yet.
41:05Mummy.
41:07Lavender Davis rang.
41:08And she's asked Fanny and me to luncheon there next Thursday.
41:11Well, Doc, I'm afraid you can't have my car.
41:13Well, Mummy, please do let me go.
41:15I do so want to go.
41:16Dismal girl, that Lavender.
41:19Far, you don't understand.
41:21There's a man coming who knows all about baby badgers.
41:24You know how long I've wanted a baby badger.
41:26Now, when you go out to London for the season,
41:28you won't want to be bothered about baby badgers.
41:31But we're not going to London just yet, and we shan't be there forever.
41:34So please, Mummy, darling.
41:36Oh, well, we'll see.
41:39Perhaps I can borrow Far's Morris, or...
41:42Josh can take me in the day now.
41:45You are kind.
41:47Oh, you are kind.
41:49I do long for a baby badger.
41:57We must get hold of some powder.
42:00And rouge.
42:02We can blue our eyes out of Jassie's pain fox.
42:05And sleep in curlers.
42:07Has there ever been a soap out of Mummy's bathroom?
42:09And if we let it melt in the bath and soak in it for hours,
42:11we shall smell delicious.
42:21I thought you loathed Lavender Davies.
42:23Oh, shut up, Jassie.
42:25You said she was a horrible counter-hon,
42:27and that you'd like to bash it in her silly face with Ron's mallet.
42:29She never said that.
42:30You drive, Fanny.
42:31Why have you got your London suits on for Lavender Davies?
42:34Oh, do go away, Jassie.
42:36Why are you starting already?
42:38You'll be hours too early.
42:39We're going to see the badger before luncheon.
42:42How red your face is, Linda.
42:44Oh, you do look funny.
42:46Be careful with the handle, Fanny.
42:48You might catch your eyelashes with it.
42:50If you don't shut up and go away,
42:52I swear I'll put you back in the pond.
42:55Why don't you bring Lavender back here after luncheon?
42:58For a nice, long, cosy chat.
43:02Not very hot, is it?
43:04Do you think they can possibly guess?
43:06Never mind them.
43:07Do you think we've allowed enough time?
43:09We've allowed enough time for two couches, Linda.
43:12And I've got six of them safely for the Clarendon car park.
43:16It wasn't very enjoyable from our point of view.
43:20They all roared with laughter at private jokes
43:22and endlessly showed off.
43:24Still, we felt that this was life,
43:26and would have been quite happy just looking on,
43:29had it not been for our ghastly feelings of guilt.
43:34When you take a drink, everything comes.
43:36Every time the door opened,
43:37we expected it to be Uncle Matthew cracking a whip.
43:40Oh, I go hunting about three times a year, you know.
43:43We had an absolutely marvellous day yesterday.
43:46We found a calvet,
43:47and set off at a spanking pace across the cricker.
43:50And then, by Jove, just short of Molesby's Acre,
43:53my horse went lame.
43:54But would you believe it,
43:55just then my man appeared with my second amount,
43:58so off we went again!
44:04Even in such totally unpropitious surroundings,
44:07love had increased threefold in one short day.
44:23So, how was that?
44:24If that did you roar at your island,
44:25better go and wash before far sees you.
44:27Did you hear what I said?
44:28Yes, I did.
44:30If that did you roar at your island,
44:31better go and wash before far sees you.
44:33Did you see the baby badger?
44:35Oh, leave me alone, you horrible scoundrel!
44:37Not when I've asked you to.
44:39Far wants you both in the business room.
44:41As soon as you came back, he said.
44:43The sooner you can leave by the look of them.
44:46You realise if you were married women,
44:47your husbands could divorce you for this?
44:50No, they couldn't, Far.
44:52I know all about divorce, because I've read all the stuff...
44:54Don't interrupt your father!
44:57Now we know you can't be trusted,
44:58which will have to take certain steps.
45:01Honey, you can go straight home tomorrow,
45:04and I never want to see you here again.
45:07You understand?
45:11Emily will have control of you from now on.
45:14She will turn out the same way as your mother,
45:17as sure as eggs is eggs.
45:20Are eggs?
45:24As for you, miss,
45:26there's no question of a London season now.
45:29Too many chances for slipping off.
45:31You can stew in your own juice here.
45:42Goodbye, darling Fanny!
45:44Oh, you are lucky not to be more miserable me!
45:49Goodbye!
45:51Bye!
45:57Heaven alone knows how they found out.
46:00Pure magic.
46:02Quite simple, really.
46:03Somebody left a scarf in Krosick's rooms,
46:05and he rang Alkenley to ask if it was either of you.
46:08It's all in Sadie's letter.
46:10What now?
46:11Uncle Matthew said there was no more question of a London season,
46:14and that Linda would have to be watched every minute of the day.
46:17As I told you before, Fanny,
46:19Matt Alkenley is like the demon king in the pantomime.
46:22He leaps up out of the trap door,
46:24all horns, hot air and cackle.
46:28John, Fort William and I have quietly explained to him
46:31that what you two did, by modern standards, was perfectly normal.
46:36Though it was very wrong of you to have told such shameless and silly lies.
46:40Matt, of course, has just crawled back through his trap door.
46:43The thin end of the wedge has been inserted.
46:45Linda will get a London season,
46:47and everything will go ahead as planned.
46:49Only you will both have to promise
46:51that you will never act in such an underhand way again,
46:55and that if there is anything you particularly want to do,
46:58you'll always ask your Aunt Sadie.
47:02Only then, of course, it will always be no.
47:05Can you imagine what Sadie would say if he were asked to a nightclub?
47:09Oh, I do long and long and long to go to a nightclub.
47:13We might just as well not be grown up at all.
47:16Oh, those young men.
47:18How dull they are.
47:20How dull they are, Fanny, do admit.
47:22I do admit.
47:23So like one another, you can't tell them apart.
47:26Let alone remember their names.
47:29Oh, darling Tony.
47:31If only he wasn't still at Oxford.
47:33PHONE RINGS
47:36Time to go out to tea with Farthouse, Lord.
47:39No, today it's tea with Aunt Sadie at Gunter's.
47:43And so our season went on.
47:46But then, early one summer's morning,
47:48after the ball was over and we were at last going home.
47:52As we climbed into a taxi with Aunt Sadie,
47:54who would never keep a chauffeur up at night,
47:57when the great hoses were already washing the streets...
48:19DOOR CLOSES
48:25Bye-bye.
48:26Sally home.
48:29Right then, where shall we, er...
48:35Linda!
48:37Coming, Farth!
48:39It's that bloody Han Krizek on the telephone.
48:42I'm telling him to get the hell out of it!
48:45I will not have you mixed up with Germans, do you understand?
48:49Well, I am mixed up, as it happens.
48:53I'm engaged to him.
49:14MUSIC PLAYS
49:44MUSIC CONTINUES
50:14MUSIC CONTINUES
50:44MUSIC STOPS

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