• 2 days ago
Richard Eagleton's intense pitch of an AI comedy startup goes wrong when his marital problems are revealed live. | dG1fNzk2SWRFVzV5Zkk
Transcript
00:00And that's what the future of stand-up solutions is.
00:03Government applications.
00:05I got a question.
00:10How many people here trust their elected officials?
00:13Boo!
00:15Throw them out with the stinky cabbage, mate!
00:20The elected officials, they get into power,
00:22and they just can't help themselves.
00:24They get bribed, and they take the bribes,
00:26and they can be corrupted, they can be gotten to.
00:28They can be put on a private jet, flown to an island, Epstein.
00:30All these things can happen to them.
00:32They can be gotten to.
00:34But AI can't be bribed.
00:37A fully AI democracy.
00:40Now, we went ahead and did a test in Wisconsin.
00:43This is Portage County in Wisconsin.
00:45If you're running for president in the United States,
00:47you're going to be spending a lot of time in Wisconsin.
00:49And if you're spending a lot of time in Wisconsin,
00:51you're going to be spending a lot of time in Portage, Wisconsin.
00:53This county specifically went for Obama,
00:55then it went for Trump, then it went for Biden.
00:57It can tip the whole state one way or the other.
00:59It's an incredibly important county,
01:01and we went there,
01:03and we asked all the registered Republicans,
01:05and we asked all the registered Democrats,
01:07can we have your 5G data?
01:09And they said, yes!
01:11We took their data.
01:13We took all their...
01:15Unrestricted, we took all their data.
01:17Everything that they're saying on Discord,
01:19everything that they're saying in the middle of the night,
01:21really loud over Xbox Live anonymously.
01:24You know, everything that you type into the text bubble,
01:27and then you say, actually, wait a minute,
01:29before you send it, you go, that's maybe too far,
01:31I don't want that out there in the world,
01:33and you delete it, we still get that.
01:35Take all that information, and we created
01:37fully avatar AI candidates
01:39that can go on the news,
01:41that can answer questions, that can debate one another,
01:43and they don't have to guess what their constituency
01:45wants them to do,
01:47because we have everybody's actual thoughts and feelings
01:49directly in their private chats,
01:51and we put them directly into the AI's brain.
01:53So they don't ever have to guess.
01:55We created a face and a name
01:57based on what people like and their interests.
01:59We created an AI Republican candidate
02:02based on what people actually like
02:04and what they look at most on the internet,
02:06and the AI Republican candidate's name
02:08is Yeti Bareback Breeding.
02:10And the cool thing about this
02:17is he doesn't have to guess,
02:19like, what's the number one thing that my constituency cares about.
02:22We could just take the number one thing
02:24that they care about and put it directly into his brain,
02:27and the number one thing that registered Republicans care about,
02:29what he's running on his campaign promise,
02:31is to get white actors back into commercials.
02:39Now, we went ahead and did the exact same process
02:41with the registered Democrats,
02:44and we created a Democratic candidate,
02:47and that candidate's name is Coxsari.
03:00And he's running on the campaign promise
03:02of getting the West Wing back on television.
03:06And the cool thing about this is you don't have to vote.
03:08You don't have to go to your polling place.
03:10Just use your phone.
03:11We take all of that information,
03:13we tabulate it into a vote,
03:14and a winner is declared by 5G.
03:16It's incredible!

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