Raúl González cumplió los 18 años hace poco.
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00:00They had a baby girl of a month and I feel that mine was like that yesterday and next week it turns one year old.
00:05Life goes by very fast so you have to take advantage of it, pamper it and pamper it.
00:09And well, at some point adolescence has to come, and courage.
00:14As courage for the parents of these little ones, no, but these guys are good, those who accompany me every day.
00:18They are the people who are behind the radio La Estrella de Puente Alto.
00:23Through their radio they deliver help, assistance, social assistance to the people who need it the most.
00:28They are examples of teenagers, but teenagers after all.
00:32We are here with Raúl, with Javier and with Itzamo.
00:37We start with Raúl. He has just turned 18 years old and we want to see his vision as a teenager.
00:43And you told us that your big problem is that your parents continue to treat you like a child,
00:47even though you are already legally an adult.
00:49Yes, especially when you grow up, your parents are still like protectors with you.
00:58They don't let you do certain things and they don't understand that you are already 18 years old.
01:05But what kind of things, for example, do they call you a lot, don't let you go to parties, how does it work?
01:10For example, when I go out, they call me every now and then, every ten minutes or every five.
01:19But I know they do it to know how you are, but once in a while it's fine.
01:30Raúl, I understand you perfectly because my dad, I am 38 years old and he is still like that with me.
01:35But adolescence is terrible because you want to go out, be with your friends,
01:40you are full of energy, I imagine maybe suddenly meeting a girl and there is the dad, the mom on the phone.
01:46It's a bit unbearable, but that's what bothers me the most sometimes.
01:55And it generates fights, right?
01:57It doesn't generate fights, but I take it as humor, because somehow they always want to be with you wherever you go.
02:14They are on the phone, they are not close to you, but they are on the phone.
02:20Raúl, look, I want to tell you that you always have to remember when you were a teenager,
02:25and in my case, I just want to tell you that it was a very big generational and technological change.
02:30Because, for example, when I was a teenager, my mom couldn't call me on the phone because there were no cell phones.
02:36Nor messages.
02:38So what my mom did was go look for me inside the party.
02:41And you think, oh my God, I'm so unlucky.
02:47Because they only call you on the phone, maybe they send you a message.
02:51But I think...
02:51There was something else.
02:52What?
02:53The lady was waiting for her dad at the door and they said it over the microphone in the middle of the party.
02:57Yes.
02:58The music stopped and everything.
02:59Yes.
02:59It was terrible, no, but also when you didn't hear that call, my mom came in like this,
03:05but so much smoke, what is this?
03:07What a shame.
03:09But really, I think that here we have to make a difference.
03:11And that's why I want to include what you are telling us, the campus world,
03:15because one thing is the concern, but on the other hand, young people,
03:19teenagers specifically, can take it as a control.
03:23So where is that line? How not to make a mistake?
03:28In fact, adolescence, the etymological root has to do with young, that grows.
03:34In terms of the origin of the word.
03:38And in the intermediate stage between being an infant, that is, dependent,
03:44I have to follow certain rules, I can't self-raise myself alone,
03:48I need protection, protection and raising.
03:50And being an adult, which is exactly the opposite, autonomous, independent,
03:54responsible of my own actions, look at what I'm saying, responsible of my actions,
03:58take care of what I speak, think and do.
04:02Sure.
04:02And no one protects me anymore.
04:04That is, if I had a red light and I was going with a copete, I called.
04:08You can't take me out of my dad.
04:09Yes.
04:09That, on the 17th, 354, the next day, you answer for yourself.
04:16That's what the law says, but the emotional transit, the process of adaptation,
04:21so that not only he, but his parents, we adapt that the rules of the game
04:27must change, is a joint task.
04:30So, because here the path to adulthood began, that is, the day when,
04:36supposedly, if everything goes well, most parents say,
04:40if we are efficient, our children one day leave the house
04:43and make their own life project.
04:45Look at this, out of here, the parents who didn't do the job well,
04:50some children stay at home forever.
04:52Look.
04:53And sometimes the parents who don't do the job well,
04:55the children leave the house too quickly.
04:57Yes, but there is a topic.
04:58Because we are considering here that it can generate a conflict
05:01between the son and the parents, and especially when they call them so much.
05:04They think they are controlling them so much that sometimes
05:07or they don't answer the messages, or they don't answer the phone,
05:10because, hey, if they call me once, twice, three times.
05:12Yes, and here comes a very important point.
05:14Always, the changes of a system are going to be frictionated.
05:18There is no non-fighting.
05:20It is very good that he gives those battles.
05:22When I say those battles,
05:25they say, hey, dad, cut it out, don't call me so much.
05:27It's okay if they call me, but every five minutes, a lot.
05:30Yes?
05:31But that is done by talking and negotiating the new rules of the game.
05:34Because, I insist, one, kid, this has happened to all of us,
05:37one has not realized how he has grown up.
05:40Sure.
05:41And that also happens to parents who have not realized,
05:43because for your dad, you still have eight in your heart and in your head.
05:48One is a child.
05:49Yes.
05:50It's like my mom, who still thinks I'm 15.
05:53The point, then, Priscila, is how, because parents tend to retain.
05:57It is difficult to let go and let your son, because he is afraid,
06:00that something happens to him, that he is going to grow up.
06:02It is the young man who has to go giving the challenges,
06:05and showing that he has already grown up.
06:07And how does Raúl demonstrate, for example?
06:09Demonstrate that he has already grown up, so that they don't call him,
06:12don't insist so much.
06:13Of course, because something can happen to him,
06:15and I finish with this, very short, that they ask,
06:17treat me as an adult, but sometimes there is behavior.
06:19Let me go out, don't call me so much,
06:21everything is messy.
06:22Let's ask Raúl how he behaves.
06:24Then the dad says, but how?
06:26But well, I would be an adult for some things.
06:28I want to ask Raúl.
06:30Raúl, you are well behaved.
06:32How could we qualify your behavior?
06:35Have you shown that you have already become an adult?
06:39Very sincerely.
06:41Yes, well, yes, no.
06:45Especially, I consider myself an untouchable person,
06:53how to say it, because I'm not like,
06:55I mean, I don't go to parties every day,
07:00and things like that.
07:01I don't have friends.
07:03The only friends I have are the people who work on the radio.
07:06And now that I'm getting involved in the field of work,
07:14then you also become more responsible in your things,
07:17in your actions.
07:20What did you say about the order of the piece?
07:22The order of the piece, always,
07:24always the primordial,
07:26you have to have it always in order.
07:28Hey, super good.
07:29Wait, wait.
07:30Do you want to see if that's true or not?
07:33If you are in the open air, we could see your smile.
07:35It's true, it's in order, isn't it?
07:38Yes.
07:41Yes, it's in order.
07:43Hey, the teenager example,
07:46to make you a statue.
07:48Yes, let's see.
07:49I'm going to tell you something, Clarissa,
07:51that someone wants to ask the world, Campuzano,
07:53I don't know if it's Raúl or his friends.
07:55Raúl, what happens is that he commented something very interesting,
07:57that he says, look, I'm one of few friends,
07:59and now, I don't know, Raúl, if I'm wrong,
08:01but you were saying, now that I've gotten a little into the world
08:03of the radio, I'm starting to flourish
08:05and to leave home a little more.
08:07To work.
08:08So, sometimes it happens that in families that have been very atomized,
08:12very careful, always all together,
08:14we go together everywhere, with little social life,
08:16rather just us, more hermetic.
08:18Suddenly, the kids want to grow up,
08:20and suddenly, for those parents, the change is in a year.
08:22Of course.
08:23And it's radical.
08:24So, they get scared a lot.
08:25So, they tend to overprotect more,
08:27because suddenly he, being a child rather of few friends,
08:29of being at home, well behaved,
08:31suddenly he wants to go out, he has friends,
08:33he meets new people.
08:34And all the novelty is threatening for the parents.
08:36Yes, it may happen to the parents.
08:38What I want to say is that suddenly for the parents,
08:41to accompany the process of socialization,
08:43the life of growth, in general, is done outside the house.
08:45The house inside is to protect, care and contain.
08:47And outside are the challenges.
08:49So, to go through that, not from one year to the next.
08:51Hey, it sounds easy, the campus world.
08:53Yes.
08:55You have to call it.
08:57Do you have teenage daughters?
08:59Yes, I have two teenage daughters.
09:01It's more difficult.
09:03It's more difficult than those who are not yours.
09:05Of course, because there you have to set the limits.
09:07Exactly.
09:10You have to agree with her or with him,
09:12depending on who has them.
09:14I think that life gets you used to it,
09:16because first you are going to be a father and a mother, of course.
09:18And you have to get used to it in that period,
09:20in the nine months that the transformations begin,
09:22to get used to how this baby girl is.
09:24And suddenly, as Clarissa said a minute ago,
09:26my baby has been a month, a little while,
09:28and now she is going to turn one year old.
09:30Mine is 16 today.
09:32My baby girl is tiny, as we used to say.
09:34And when they ask you for permission to go out,
09:36because you are already going out,
09:38you have to say,
09:40Marcelo, remember when you were a teenager.
09:42And you are more afraid.
09:44I am more afraid of them than of her.
09:46I am more afraid of little men than of little girls.
09:48And why are you afraid?
09:50Because you know more or less what she raised,
09:52and you know more or less
09:54what she is going to say
09:56and how she is going to act.
09:58But the environment,
10:00that future that can come,
10:02those things are the ones that suddenly torment her.
10:04There is a lot of fear.
10:07You start to remember
10:09one of your friends,
10:11how she was when she was 16.
10:13And I think that is the worst karma
10:15of the father of a teenage daughter.
10:17And there you pay all your guilt
10:19when you have a teenage girl.
10:21Clarissa, let's keep talking with the kids.