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00:00:00Ellen Musk, the only woman on the Forbes 30 under 30 list, arrives at Atlanta today.
00:00:11What a business tycoon is doing here in Georgia, a forgotten stage no one knows.
00:00:16Angela, my next door neighbor, still selling your hippie junk here?
00:00:20If your mother-in-law sees, she's going to throw a big fit again.
00:00:26Your mother-in-law was right about you.
00:00:28What's the point of watching the news all day about these moguls if you can't even apply it to your penniless self?
00:00:33And how do you know that this is none of my business?
00:00:38All right, everybody get out.
00:00:40We got an important guest coming.
00:00:45You.
00:00:50You deaf? I said pack up and scram.
00:00:52I paid the staff here already, and if you want me to leave, then fine, but you have to compensate for today's losses.
00:01:00I want to say that again.
00:01:03You know who's visiting today?
00:01:05Ellen freaking Musk, one of the richest people in the world.
00:01:09Ellen Musk. Of course, a hick like you probably never heard of her.
00:01:13Just know that you can't afford to piss her off.
00:01:16Really? Ellen Musk is flying all the way to Atlanta just to come to some flea market.
00:01:23You don't think that she could be coming to see me?
00:01:29Coming to see you. All right.
00:01:32You know what? I'll play your game.
00:01:34If she does it so much as give you a glance, I'll I'll eat dirt.
00:01:40Deal. Ellen Musk, get to the flea market within 10 minutes or else you're fired.
00:02:10Prepare the limo.
00:02:15Miss Lockhart requires us immediately.
00:02:23Ah, your 10 minutes is almost up.
00:02:25Good. Hope you don't wet your pants.
00:02:28Five, four, three, two, one.
00:02:40Ellen, I mean, Miss Musk, Ellen, I mean, I'm sorry that I started to frighten you.
00:02:50How's my boss, bitch? Kick ass, girlfriend.
00:02:53So how do you like?
00:02:57She's my boss and I prefer business partner or best friend.
00:03:03No way. Well.
00:03:12No, no, no. I'm sorry for your boss. No, I won't do it again.
00:03:19That's enough. We're not tyrants here.
00:03:28Sir, I found Angela Lockhart.
00:03:36You mean Angela Lockhart.
00:03:41You made me lose one million dollars in just one game of poker.
00:03:46Who are you? Where is she?
00:03:51Atlanta. And you were right.
00:03:53It was secretly her propping up Ellen Musk.
00:03:55My clever bride, I will chase you to the end of the world if I have to.
00:04:04Max, prep the jet.
00:04:06I'm heading to Atlanta.
00:04:12Dr. Wilson, Ben Sterling's on the move.
00:04:14He's headed to Atlanta. Atlanta.
00:04:16The game is afoot. I'm going.
00:04:18Wait, Dr. Wilson, the Prince of Bhutan needs your medical attention.
00:04:21He can wait. I need to pick up my bride.
00:04:28Dr. Wilson.
00:04:34Gino Eisenhower reporting, sir.
00:04:38Ben Sterling and Shane Wilson are headed to Atlanta.
00:04:41Atlanta.
00:04:43Where is that?
00:04:45Warner, prepare my warplane.
00:04:47Those two are going after my fiancee.
00:04:49This is war.
00:05:07I've secretly allowed your husband, Jared Cooper,
00:05:09to win the bid on the Maple Plaza project like you asked me to.
00:05:12Thank you so much, Ellen.
00:05:15This is going to be the best anniversary gift ever.
00:05:18That project is worth billions.
00:05:19He can finally take his company public.
00:05:21But Angela, my boss,
00:05:25I don't understand why you do so much for him behind the scenes
00:05:28without ever revealing your true identity.
00:05:32Without your backing, no offense, but he's nothing without you.
00:05:37Well, three years ago.
00:05:59You saved me.
00:06:04He saved me and I fell in love with him instantly.
00:06:08I didn't want to reveal my true identity
00:06:10because I didn't want him to feel the pressure
00:06:12of being with a billionaire heiress.
00:06:15But now with this contract,
00:06:17I feel like we'll be on more equal footing
00:06:19and then I can finally come out to the public.
00:06:22So that's why you have me secretly helping him.
00:06:26I'm sure he'll be moved when he finds out.
00:06:30But why work at the flea market?
00:06:33Are you disguising yourself to test him?
00:06:36Well, these exotic spices are incredibly rare
00:06:40and cost a fortune to find.
00:06:42Plus, I get to make the best dishes for my hubby and his mom.
00:06:46You seem happy being a housewife.
00:06:52Where the hell are you?
00:06:53Don't tell me you were selling junk at the flea market again.
00:06:57Get home stacked.
00:06:58It's a big day today.
00:07:01That was...
00:07:03My mother-in-law, Carol.
00:07:05She judges me because she thinks I come from a lower-class family.
00:07:08But she's going to be ecstatic tonight
00:07:10when I finally come out and tell her who I really am.
00:07:14You know, she even remembered our third-year anniversary.
00:07:22Please spend more time with my son.
00:07:26Hi, I'm home.
00:07:28I have a big announcement I have to make.
00:07:31Finally, you're back. Now sign the divorce papers.
00:07:36Divorce papers?
00:07:39Is this some sort of misunderstanding, Mom?
00:07:42God, don't call me Mom again.
00:07:46We're ending that relationship.
00:07:48Just look at you. Dirt all over.
00:07:51You're selling the title of Mrs Cooper.
00:07:53You don't deserve my son. You're way below his league.
00:07:58I'm below his league?
00:07:59That's right.
00:08:01You are.
00:08:02Jared is signing a $100 billion contract tomorrow
00:08:06with the Ellen Musk.
00:08:09And then his company's going public.
00:08:11That's how much he's accomplished in three years.
00:08:14But you?
00:08:15You're still just a stinky, hippie peddler.
00:08:20Jared's like the king in the clouds.
00:08:22And you...
00:08:23You will always just be a pawn.
00:08:27Like dirt on our shoes.
00:08:32Dirt on your shoes?
00:08:34But Ellen Musk works for me.
00:08:38You're delusional.
00:08:39You will never upgrade to a queen.
00:08:42How dare you compare yourself to the real deal here?
00:08:48Resorting to lies is definitely not good enough for Jared.
00:08:51And who are you to come into my house
00:08:55and meddle with my family matters?
00:08:59You're nothing but a pathetic excuse for a wife.
00:09:04Jared deserves a queen like Kaylee.
00:09:07Not a lowlife dirtbag.
00:09:09Enough!
00:09:10Jared, I knew you wouldn't divorce me.
00:09:15But I am.
00:09:17Don't fight it, Angela.
00:09:19Here's 500K.
00:09:21You'll never make this much as a hippie peddler selling spices.
00:09:25Now sign the papers, take your check, and leave.
00:09:28Don't embarrass yourself further.
00:09:32I've done so much for you these past three years.
00:09:36Did that not mean anything to you?
00:09:39Didn't expect you to be so greedy.
00:09:42Fine.
00:09:43Here's another 200,000.
00:09:46500,000 is too much for her already.
00:09:49She's done nothing.
00:09:50Hasn't even contributed a grandchild.
00:09:54She just sells cheap grass all day.
00:09:56Is that really how much I'm worth to all of you?
00:10:01I took care of both of you these past three years.
00:10:05You think we can't just hire a maid to cook for us or something?
00:10:09And she wouldn't embarrass us with that permanent stench?
00:10:14A hippie peddler becoming the wife of a CEO?
00:10:18What a joke.
00:10:19If you actually love my son,
00:10:22you'll sign the damn divorce papers already.
00:10:25And leave.
00:10:28You really think that Jared would have gotten that Mabel Plaza
00:10:31bid without me?
00:10:33Let alone taking the company public?
00:10:35I did everything for you, Jared.
00:10:39Now you take credit for my son's success?
00:10:43It's all my work.
00:10:46Baby, we're going to be late for the auction
00:10:50if we keep letting this psycho stall us.
00:10:55You did say you would win me Princess Diana's tiara,
00:10:58didn't you?
00:10:59So, she's the reason for the divorce.
00:11:03She's worth more than you, Angela.
00:11:07Fine.
00:11:10Fine.
00:11:12I'll sign it.
00:11:14But don't regret it.
00:11:17Regret?
00:11:19Do you know who I am?
00:11:21Yeah, a cockroach that only knows how to crawl her way
00:11:23into a married man's bed?
00:11:25I'm Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
00:11:29Jared winning the bid on Mabel Plaza was because of my dad.
00:11:34Because he's business partners with Ellen Musk.
00:11:38It's part of the power that I have as an elite.
00:11:43You can't do shit because you're poor.
00:11:46Social stratum matters.
00:11:49Yeah, social stratum does matter.
00:11:52And the Coopers are beneath me.
00:11:56And you really think Ellen Musk would come to Atlanta
00:11:59if it weren't for me?
00:12:00Ha!
00:12:01You're delusional.
00:12:03Now sign the papers and scram!
00:12:07Ah!
00:12:09You owe me.
00:12:11You dirty bitch.
00:12:12You're sick of me.
00:12:13Ah!
00:12:20You hit me.
00:12:24Now sign the papers, take your check, and get the fuck out!
00:12:38I don't need your penny money.
00:12:42We're finished.
00:12:44You don't want the money?
00:12:45That's your loss.
00:12:47Your check is just pennies to me.
00:12:50But I would like my ring back.
00:13:03Have fun.
00:13:06Have fun on your economy flight
00:13:09while I catch a ride on my private helicopter out of here.
00:13:17And I'm way out of your league.
00:13:24Isn't that the Winston Blue Diamond Ring?
00:13:28It's worth tens of millions of dollars.
00:13:31Oh, it's probably just cheap glass.
00:13:34Something she found at the flea market.
00:13:37You're right.
00:13:38She could never afford anything so expensive.
00:13:43Congrats, Jared Boo Boo, on getting rid of that dirt bag.
00:13:48Oh, my dad says there's going to be a secret big shot financial tycoon
00:13:53at tomorrow's summit.
00:13:55Bigger big shot than Ellen Musk?
00:13:58Yeah.
00:13:59And nobody's met them, but I can introduce you.
00:14:03Everything's thanks to you, babe.
00:14:21Angela, Mr. Vanderbilt, the richest man in Georgia,
00:14:24wants to schedule a meeting before the bidding.
00:14:26Vanderbilt?
00:14:27Yeah, he's actually CEO of one of our companies.
00:14:30Basically our employee.
00:14:31Okay, I'll meet him at the summit tomorrow. It's fine.
00:14:33You're still going to the summit tomorrow?
00:14:35But you and Jared Cooper are already divorced.
00:14:37That's exactly why I'm going.
00:15:02Angela Lockhart.
00:15:05I finally found you.
00:15:07Who is he?
00:15:09That? That's Devin Sterling.
00:15:11He's number one on Forbes' 30 under 30 list,
00:15:14an early investor of crypto,
00:15:16CEO of Sterling Enterprises.
00:15:18Rumor has it he's worth trillions.
00:15:21And he's your fiancé.
00:15:24What? My fiancé?
00:15:27The one and only.
00:15:30So, after running away and leaving me single for three years,
00:15:35have you figured out how you're going to make it up to me yet, babe?
00:15:47That tiara looks perfect on you.
00:15:53What is she doing here?
00:15:57You skank.
00:15:59My son just divorced you yesterday
00:16:01and you're already hooking up with another man?
00:16:04Divorced?
00:16:06That's right.
00:16:08So, I guess this was never meant to be, Mr.
00:16:12Sterling.
00:16:14Devin Sterling.
00:16:16So she has to hide her marital status to find another man.
00:16:20Guess she's not just a forsaken woman.
00:16:22She's also a stinky, penniless whore.
00:16:28How dare you insult my boss like that.
00:16:31Who the fuck are you, bitch?
00:16:34Do you know who I am?
00:16:37They don't know who you are.
00:16:40You hide it well.
00:16:42X-Team!
00:16:44Teach these fools a lesson.
00:16:47Teach these fools a lesson.
00:16:53Sir, you were kind of in a rush when you flew to Atlanta
00:16:56and then to New York.
00:16:58You forgot to bring the security team.
00:17:05Mind if I borrow your men?
00:17:08No.
00:17:12Tell us these ill-mannered apes out.
00:17:14Boo!
00:17:15You bitch.
00:17:16I'll have my son teach you a real lesson.
00:17:23A kiss as a reward, my lady.
00:17:27No.
00:17:35Guest list is very distinguished tonight.
00:17:38You've got Bill Ford, Harvey Buffett, old money like me.
00:17:43Gentlemen, Harvey, Bill, this is Jared Cooper.
00:17:46Pleased to meet you all.
00:17:48Your families all started empires after the Industrial Revolution.
00:17:51What an honor.
00:17:53I heard you secured the Maple Plaza project.
00:17:56It's worth billions of dollars.
00:17:58Congrats, you'll be next.
00:18:01But we haven't received the contract yet.
00:18:03We deserve it.
00:18:04That's nothing.
00:18:05I introduced this kid to Ellen Musk.
00:18:07Vanderbilts and Miss Musk have always had a good relationship.
00:18:10So I thought I'd help the kid out, pull a few strings.
00:18:14Thank you, Mr. Mandel.
00:18:16Now we just have to impress Miss Musk's special guest of honor.
00:18:20Yes.
00:18:21I heard they're a very important and powerful guest.
00:18:25Even wealthier than Ellen Musk.
00:18:28We can just secure a position with this big shot.
00:18:32We can feast for generations.
00:18:37I'll do my best.
00:18:43Excuse me a second, gentlemen.
00:18:46What if it's the Prince of Bhutan?
00:18:51How did a hobo like you sneak in here?
00:18:53Me? A hobo?
00:18:55How did a cheating scumbag like you sneak in here?
00:18:58You sleep your way in?
00:18:59I told you, Angela Lockhart, don't bother stalking me.
00:19:02Nothing will come of it, and it only sickens me further.
00:19:05Don't flatter yourself.
00:19:10This is your ex-husband?
00:19:13What, were you blindfolded when you married him?
00:19:16Who the hell is this?
00:19:18You were cheating on me?
00:19:31Son, you have to avenge me and Kaylee.
00:19:34That wicked ex-wife of yours hired some thugs and a gigolo to beat us up.
00:19:40They even took Kaylee's tiara.
00:19:54You dare hurt my mom and Kaylee?
00:19:59Get your hands off of her.
00:20:05My lady.
00:20:10My lady.
00:20:21My queen.
00:20:32It's...
00:20:34It's him!
00:20:36He scammed a million dollars off me in a game of poker yesterday.
00:20:39Who are these peasants?
00:20:40These seats are reserved for thee, Ellen Musk, and her special guest.
00:20:45Oh, shut up, old man.
00:20:48You're disturbing the peace.
00:20:52Fuckers, you know who that is?
00:20:54That's Eric Vanderbilt.
00:20:56You have any idea how many generations of wealth he has?
00:20:59His ancestors built the railway and steamship empire of America.
00:21:03This civil war would not have been won without his family's involvement.
00:21:06Vanderbilt.
00:21:08The father of that skank, Kaylee Vanderbilt,
00:21:13who only knows how to crawl her way into a married man's bed.
00:21:17That lonely Vanderbilt family?
00:21:26Oh, goddammit, a stomachache now?
00:21:33Whatever.
00:21:34Angela can handle herself. She'll be fine.
00:21:39Fuck.
00:21:49How dare you call one of us low?
00:21:52I'm Harvey F. N. Buffett,
00:21:54the most important investor in the entire stock market.
00:21:58I can wipe you out with a simple pinky only.
00:22:02And I can wipe you out with just a strand of my hair.
00:22:06Not with me around.
00:22:08I, Bill Ford, and the entire Ford Auto Empire stand with these gentlemen.
00:22:13You're all just peasants compared to who I really am.
00:22:18You're a fucking delusion, Angela.
00:22:20We've had enough of your games.
00:22:22Security, break their limbs and toss them out.
00:22:26Looks like the old guard's teaming up against you.
00:22:29But don't worry, you got new money.
00:22:33I can handle myself, thank you.
00:22:36Yes, my queen.
00:22:38You're all despicable.
00:22:41An insult to your family names.
00:22:46Now, it's my turn to rule.
00:22:49Destroy Jared Cooper.
00:22:52Cut off all business ties.
00:22:55And if you don't,
00:22:58I will take away all of your family's wealth and power.
00:23:03I knew it.
00:23:04You're here to fuck with me.
00:23:06You can't fool anyone here.
00:23:08How much money did you spend on that get-up
00:23:10to hire that gigolo to make me jealous?
00:23:12You're an orphan who sells hippie spices at a flea market.
00:23:16You have nothing.
00:23:18And you will always be nothing.
00:23:21She's a gold digger.
00:23:23Gold digger.
00:23:24Gigolo.
00:23:26Wanna try me for a night?
00:23:29Yeah, you're a little too pricey.
00:23:31Mr. Vanderbilt, we really shouldn't keep these bandits here any longer.
00:23:34They might upset Miss Ellen Musk and her special guest.
00:23:37Angela Lockhart is my spurned ex-wife.
00:23:39She's only here to try and ruin my bill in the Maple Plaza project.
00:23:42I'm gonna kill that sushi chef.
00:23:44Security!
00:23:50Security!
00:23:52You all don't realize that you actually all work for me.
00:23:55And now you're trying to throw a coup?
00:23:58You!
00:24:00Insolent fools.
00:24:02Let me guess.
00:24:03You're that special guest?
00:24:06I don't know.
00:24:08Throw them out!
00:24:09And not without some broken bones, too.
00:24:18Back to that ass.
00:24:23I got this.
00:24:25I got this.
00:24:51What the hell are you two doing here?
00:24:53I thought we were supposed to guard you.
00:24:55No, you're supposed to make sure Miss Lockhart is okay.
00:24:58Oh my god, we're so screwed.
00:25:09Angela!
00:25:11Don't hurt her!
00:25:12Bitch, I've always been sick of you.
00:25:14You just threw yourself at me.
00:25:16How dare you insult my boss like that?
00:25:19Boss?
00:25:20Didn't you say her boss?
00:25:22Miss Musk?
00:25:23That's Ellen Musk?
00:25:25That woman right there is Angela Lockhart.
00:25:27My boss and sole heiress to the Henry Lockhart's fortune.
00:25:31Their lineage is older than this country itself.
00:25:34Past the American Revolution?
00:25:36Back to the Renaissance.
00:25:38If she's your boss, then that means Angela Lockhart is...
00:25:41That's Lady Lockhart to you.
00:25:43She's royalty.
00:25:44And since you're all subsidiaries, she's your boss's boss.
00:25:48What the hell did you do?
00:25:49Kneel before me.
00:25:51Oh, your majesty.
00:25:54Welcome to the United States.
00:25:57We've always been your loyal subjects, haven't we?
00:26:00Yes, your highness.
00:26:02Is it queen or prince?
00:26:04It doesn't matter.
00:26:06My queen, please forgive our insolence.
00:26:09Yes, we didn't mean to offend.
00:26:12Hey, what are you doing, you idiot?
00:26:14Let go of the boss lady and beg for forgiveness.
00:26:19Come on.
00:26:27What rightfully belongs to you.
00:26:46She's a badass herself.
00:26:48I missed out on a good wife.
00:26:50You, you, you told me your wife was a hippie peddler.
00:26:54Turns out you were the freeloading scumbag this entire time.
00:26:57No, no, don't believe their lies.
00:26:59I worked hard for everything.
00:27:01You worked for everything?
00:27:07Hi, honey.
00:27:09So, our 30th anniversary is coming up.
00:27:12And I thought that maybe we can do something special this year.
00:27:15I can't focus on anything trivial like that.
00:27:17I have to figure out this bid for the Maple Plaza project.
00:27:20And if I get it, I can take the company public.
00:27:30You were nothing before me.
00:27:33All your achievements, all your glory.
00:27:36That's all mine.
00:27:38Including the Maple Plaza contract.
00:27:41I can take all of that away.
00:27:44Just like that.
00:27:46No, you can't take that away from me.
00:27:48That's why Elon Musk was urging us to pass on deals to this nobody.
00:27:52Oh, and this antique wedding ring.
00:27:55Yeah, I forgot to tell you.
00:27:57It was Queen Victoria's.
00:27:59And its worth is equivalent to more than an entire country's GDP.
00:28:08No.
00:28:09I gave you back the ring.
00:28:11I divorced a royal heiress.
00:28:14No.
00:28:15No, please.
00:28:16No.
00:28:17No, please take me back, baby.
00:28:19I still love you.
00:28:24Oh, man.
00:28:25Looks like they've started the party without us.
00:28:27No one's allowed to start a fight without Cole Eisenhower.
00:28:36God, these two again.
00:28:38Did he say...
00:28:39Is he Cole Eisenhower?
00:28:41President Eisenhower's descendant.
00:28:43Eisenhower won World War II.
00:28:44Each of his descendants have all gone on to become five-star generals.
00:28:48The highest rank in the nation's military.
00:28:50Bloody buffoons know your history.
00:28:52Sorry I'm late, babe.
00:28:53I got lost trying to find Atlanta.
00:28:55Then lost again on my way back to New York.
00:29:01And that there is...
00:29:03That is the legendary boy genius, Dr. Wilson.
00:29:07He's Dr. House's protege.
00:29:09Dr. House?
00:29:10I thought that was just a TV show.
00:29:12That's based on a real figure.
00:29:13Yep, that's me.
00:29:14Son of James House.
00:29:16Dr. House?
00:29:17He's practically my uncle.
00:29:19I correctly diagnosed the Pope before him when I was just 12 years old.
00:29:22So he's been off carrying himself a waterfall somewhere in the Netherlands for the last 15 years.
00:29:28And I'm late because I ran out of gum and had to make a pit stop.
00:29:36Hey, Ellen.
00:29:37Who are these weirdos and why are they here?
00:29:40Uh, they're all your fiancés.
00:29:43What?
00:29:45Fiancés?
00:29:48Plural?
00:29:49Fiancés.
00:29:50Plural?
00:29:52Watch it, nerds.
00:29:53I'm her fiancé.
00:29:55No, I'm her fiancé.
00:29:56You can both shut up.
00:29:57I'm her fiancé.
00:29:59It's you.
00:30:00It's me.
00:30:01Who the hell is he?
00:30:02I'm Spider-Man.
00:30:05How are all three of these men my fiancé?
00:30:10Your father had arranged these engagements years ago, but I didn't tell you because you decided to marry Jared Cooper at the time.
00:30:17She has three badass fiancés and she marries his dumb ass.
00:30:24Whatever.
00:30:25Since you're all here, help me finish them.
00:30:30Since you're all here, help me finish them.
00:30:35At your service.
00:30:37Me too.
00:30:43One down, two more to go.
00:30:45She's become queen.
00:30:46Bishop to G4.
00:30:51Ow.
00:30:52Ow.
00:30:53Ow.
00:30:54What is that?
00:30:55The most German fest and water in the Nile River.
00:31:01Rook to A8.
00:31:05Hello?
00:31:10I thought I was king.
00:31:11No, you wish.
00:31:13The king doesn't do anything, so Alan can be my king.
00:31:16Oh, fine.
00:31:21Big group to four, it's right this second.
00:31:28I...
00:31:30I've been bankrupt.
00:31:32No!
00:31:34Who is he?
00:31:40I've been bankrupt.
00:31:42No!
00:31:43I told you I would remove all of you from status and power if you didn't cooperate.
00:31:48Well, guess what?
00:31:49Game over.
00:31:50All right, boys.
00:31:51Let's figure out this four-way engagement.
00:31:54Oh, that's serious business.
00:31:56I'm right with you.
00:31:59Wait for me.
00:32:00Nobody beats me to the finish line.
00:32:11Angela.
00:32:14You already have three fiancées?
00:32:17You can't accuse me of cheating.
00:32:19I want compensation.
00:32:24You greedy SOB.
00:32:26Who the fuck is that?
00:32:27My ex-husband.
00:32:29Wait.
00:32:30You were married?
00:32:31Yeah.
00:32:32And if that's a problem for you, then you can totally back out of this engagement.
00:32:36More for me.
00:32:37No, no.
00:32:38Of course not.
00:32:39Just...
00:32:40Do you want me to check your eyes for you?
00:32:42Don't steal my joke.
00:32:43I can make him disappear without a trace.
00:32:45All evidence of your past with him will be gone.
00:32:49What?
00:32:50Is there something on my face?
00:32:51Uh, yeah.
00:32:52Murderous intent.
00:32:54Let's remarry.
00:32:56Let's remarry.
00:32:58You still don't realize.
00:33:00I only fell in love with you because you saved me from drowning three years ago.
00:33:28Sir, it's an emergency.
00:33:30We need to wreck right away.
00:33:32Nicole Eisenhower and Shane Wilson are causing mayhem at the company warehouse.
00:33:36Okay, I'm on my way.
00:33:40She should be okay now.
00:33:45Hey, you.
00:33:46Watch over her.
00:33:47I'll be right back.
00:33:58You saved me.
00:34:03Fuck.
00:34:04Unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:34:08Fuck.
00:34:09Unwittingly gave away my own wife.
00:34:11You've cheated on me.
00:34:13You've hit me.
00:34:14You've insulted me.
00:34:16And after all that, I never want to see you again.
00:34:20I fucking hate you.
00:34:23There's a lady lock on.
00:34:25God, what now?
00:34:27Yes, we understand that you are a very busy person,
00:34:32but if you're not going to give your ex-husband the Maple Plaza project...
00:34:36How about us three?
00:34:37Yes, unlike that scumbag, we won't turn on you.
00:34:41Yeah, no.
00:34:42You're all fired for trying to throw a coup.
00:34:44But...
00:34:46This is your fault, you doofus.
00:34:48We never should have believed your bullshit.
00:34:50No.
00:34:51No.
00:34:53We can't lose our positions with Elon Musk in the lock on.
00:34:58Help me.
00:34:59I'll get you for this.
00:35:07I never should have listened to you.
00:35:08I'm ruined because of you.
00:35:23So, what's the situation here?
00:35:26I don't want to marry you.
00:35:36I don't want to marry you.
00:35:39Listen, I only met you guys a few hours ago,
00:35:43and I'm not interested in flash marriages.
00:35:46But what if I told you that we've known each other for much longer?
00:35:51Much longer than just a few hours?
00:35:53Much longer.
00:35:57Angela?
00:35:58Your parents would like to have a video call with all of you.
00:36:05My lovely princess, how are you?
00:36:08Look, your mother and I are in Italy.
00:36:10The views here are absolutely stunning.
00:36:13Perfect for a wedding, wouldn't you say?
00:36:15I heard you finally divorced that good-for-nothing, blood-sucking,
00:36:21freeloader husband of yours.
00:36:23Can't call his name, but anyway, congratulations.
00:36:27I've selected three prime young men for you to choose from to replace him.
00:36:32Oh, you must pick one of them to marry.
00:36:35Otherwise...
00:36:36Let me do it.
00:36:38You must choose one of them in seven days.
00:36:41Otherwise, we'll kill ourselves.
00:36:46Mom?
00:36:47All right, honey, that's it.
00:36:49Bye. Bye.
00:36:55So, who are you going to choose?
00:36:59Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:37:04Well, what if I want all three of you?
00:37:10That seems greedy.
00:37:16But I can always remove the other two options.
00:37:21Hey, I may be a doctor, but I can take lives too.
00:37:25I know and have access to all the deadliest poisons in the world.
00:37:30Whoa, okay, no murder, please. I was just kidding.
00:37:36You have seven days to win her over.
00:37:38Ooh, it's like The Bachelorette.
00:37:41I know. We'll start with challenge one.
00:37:46Welcome to the show, The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
00:37:50Today, we have our first challenge.
00:37:55What is all of this, Ellen?
00:37:58You'll see.
00:38:07Oh my God! Oh my God! Cockroaches!
00:38:09All women are afraid of cockroaches.
00:38:12And it is every man's job to save their beloved woman from this monstrosity of a creature.
00:38:18What will our three candidates do to prove their undying love for our single, but screaming her head off, heiress?
00:38:33Looks like one of our contestants has already called it quits.
00:38:36It's up to the final two.
00:38:43Oh my God!
00:39:01Crunchy.
00:39:03That is sick, Cole.
00:39:04Hey, when you're stranded in the middle of the battlefield, you'll be glad to see we have these around.
00:39:10There are two more left. Want to try one?
00:39:12Oh my God! No! No!
00:39:16Oh my God! Save me!
00:39:17What? Save you? You're going to save me!
00:39:22I'm a German folk doctor. These hands can't get germs on them. They're for surgery and saving lives.
00:39:39No!
00:39:44Thank God you're here.
00:39:47Are you alright, honey?
00:39:50Angela!
00:39:53Alright, you won the first challenge, so you're a reward.
00:39:56You get to watch over her for the night. Just don't cross the line, if you know what I mean.
00:40:01I'm not her scumbag husband. You have nothing to worry about.
00:40:10Honestly, even if you guys fuck, it's not like it's against the rules or anything.
00:40:13At least my girlfriend gets some.
00:40:15I bet her husband has a small dick anyway.
00:40:20The cockroaches!
00:40:21They're gone, they're gone.
00:40:23There's nothing in this room except you and me, okay?
00:40:26I'm going to kill Ellen when I see her tomorrow.
00:40:33I need a drink.
00:40:40Whoa, easy! You're on an empty stomach.
00:40:43Oh, why do you care?
00:40:46I'm trying to drink away your sorrows, Angela.
00:40:50You guys were right. I was blind from marrying that asshole.
00:40:56You know, I wasted three whole years of my life with him.
00:41:02He never even loved me.
00:41:04And I gave up my entire career for him.
00:41:07And I gave up my entire career for him.
00:41:13Do you really think that you would still be number one on the Forbes 30 Under 30 list if I was around?
00:41:21You may not be number one on Forbes list, but you know what you're number one in?
00:41:26What?
00:41:30You're number one here.
00:41:37You know, we've known each other kind of a long time.
00:41:41Lies.
00:41:44You all just want something from me.
00:41:51Angela, I know it's hard to trust again.
00:41:56But I assure you, I don't care what family you're from.
00:42:02I'm the richest man in the nation. I don't need your power, your status, your wealth, your connections.
00:42:11I just need you.
00:42:15I'll prove my love to you within six days. I promise.
00:42:18I promise.
00:42:29Screw the contest. I just want love.
00:42:34Angela, you're drunk.
00:42:38I'm an adult. Can't a girl just get what she wants?
00:42:42Okay.
00:42:44But love and sex aren't exactly the same thing.
00:42:48Well, they're not mutually exclusive either.
00:43:00If this is what you want.
00:43:13I love you.
00:43:31Nine inch penis.
00:43:33Morning to you too.
00:43:35You sure you were drunk last night? You wouldn't...
00:43:37A girl remembers when she's had a nine inch penis inside of her.
00:43:43Well, glad you enjoyed it.
00:43:46But don't tell Shane or Cole.
00:43:49Because then they would...
00:43:51Say that you were being unfair?
00:43:53Technically, us having sex doesn't break any rules.
00:43:56I won the first challenge, and according to Ellen, my prize was to spend the night with you anyways.
00:44:03Don't make this any harder than it already is.
00:44:08Are you sure you don't want it pretty hard?
00:44:13Stop.
00:44:16Fine, fine, fine.
00:44:20I won't tell.
00:44:22But only on one condition.
00:44:26I won't tell.
00:44:28But only on one condition.
00:44:31You have to go out on a date with me.
00:44:34Fine.
00:44:35Fine.
00:44:39I've had a crush on you since college, Angela.
00:44:42You never noticed me.
00:44:48You should get dressed and get out of here before anyone sees you.
00:44:54It's only 7am. She's still sleeping.
00:44:57Yeah, I'm not letting my fiance be alone with another man for another second.
00:45:02Morning, gentlemen. Oh, or shall I say ruffmen?
00:45:07Oh, don't mind him.
00:45:10What's up, guys?
00:45:12We're ready for the second challenge. No cockroaches this time.
00:45:16Yes, no more terrifying things. That was my bad, Angela.
00:45:19This better be a good challenge, Ellen.
00:45:22I'm sure you'll all enjoy this one.
00:45:24The second challenge is...
00:45:26The second challenge is...
00:45:28A date.
00:45:29Blame? I should have asked for something else.
00:45:31A date?
00:45:33That's it. What's the catch?
00:45:35No catch. Just who Ms. Lockhart enjoys spending her time with the most.
00:45:39As simple as that.
00:45:41I know what I want to do. Let's start with me first.
00:45:43Okay. Who's up first? Then...
00:45:45Me. Save the best for last.
00:45:47Ain't that right, Angela?
00:45:49Then it's decided.
00:45:53Please! Don't take my BMW away!
00:45:56Too bad. You pissed off the Lockharts.
00:46:00I have nothing left!
00:46:10It's that bitch who ruined me!
00:46:15It's that bitch who ruined me!
00:46:18It's that bitch who ruined me!
00:46:25General Eisenhower, sir!
00:46:27At ease, Lieutenant.
00:46:29This is my lieutenant. He also manages this boxing gym.
00:46:32Pleasure to meet you, Madam Eisenhower.
00:46:34He's so serious. But hang on.
00:46:37Lieutenant, I don't know who I'm going to marry yet.
00:46:40Baby, I decided to take you here on our first date so that I can introduce you to my guns.
00:46:44Guns? Like murder weapons?
00:46:47Yes. Murder weapons.
00:47:09You like my guns, babe?
00:47:11Pretty rock hard.
00:47:12Yeah.
00:47:14Let me show you what I can do with them.
00:47:16Lieutenant! Come close!
00:47:19Wait! You're just going to hit him like that? He's not even going to fight back?
00:47:23Fighting back would be treason, ma'am!
00:47:25Treason? You guys are way too serious.
00:47:28Look, you Lockhart bitch! I caught you!
00:47:31If I'm going down, you're all going down with me!
00:47:34Lieutenant! Pinscher attack!
00:47:43Stop!
00:47:46You dare try to hurt my wife?
00:47:50I will make you pay!
00:47:54You don't need to keep beating him up. We could just take him to the cops.
00:47:58Not when he tries to hurt you.
00:48:06Zoe's a bit violent. Some might call it being protective.
00:48:09Poor anger issues. What if we get married and I forget to use a coaster on an antique table or something?
00:48:15Is he going to be, like, rough?
00:48:18Hey, some girls are into that.
00:48:20I don't know if I am.
00:48:23Well, maybe Shane will be your type.
00:48:28Your date with Shane starts now.
00:48:34Hey.
00:48:36Hey.
00:48:38Hey.
00:48:40Cool ride.
00:48:42A gift from the Chancellor of Germany when I saved his wife.
00:48:45Impressive.
00:48:49Your breath smells like peppermint.
00:48:52Refreshing.
00:48:54I got cool mint, too.
00:48:56Or do you prefer spearmint?
00:48:58What do you not have in this coat of yours?
00:49:02Fruit flavored gum. I can't stand those.
00:49:05So, where are you taking me, Shane?
00:49:08Okay.
00:49:14Dr. Wilson!
00:49:16Oh, a VIP of VIPs.
00:49:19Right this way.
00:49:20VIP of VIPs?
00:49:22Ah, just some other guy I saved. I forget who.
00:49:25You saved a lot of people.
00:49:27I do what I can.
00:49:29Oh, my gosh.
00:49:31It's my gold-digging neighbor who just got dumped by her husband.
00:49:35Sandra Miller, what are you doing here?
00:49:38I just thought this was for the VIP of VIPs.
00:49:41Your mother-in-law told me all about the divorce
00:49:43and how you hired some gigolo to beat her and Kaylee Vanderbilt up.
00:49:48Hello of you.
00:49:50What are you doing here, Sandra?
00:49:52Of course your bird brain wouldn't remember.
00:49:54I sell high fashion jewelry pieces so high end,
00:49:57you couldn't even afford even a few soldier organs.
00:50:00The auction begins.
00:50:01I'll deal with you later.
00:50:04Yeah, I'll just be right inside.
00:50:10Cameron, I have a task for you.
00:50:15Our next piece is absolutely extraordinary.
00:50:19Cleopatra's armband.
00:50:21Sold by our vendor, Sandra Miller.
00:50:25For five million dollars.
00:50:28Excuse me.
00:50:29Excuse me.
00:50:31I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:50:34It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:50:36I'd like to donate this piece to auction.
00:50:39It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:50:41What are you doing?
00:50:43Just watch.
00:50:49That is Queen Victoria's ring?
00:50:52Please, I'm an expert and that's a fake.
00:50:55She probably got it at the flea market she works at.
00:50:57You work at a flea market?
00:50:59Not this again.
00:51:01Cut the bullshit, that wouldn't even sell for five dollars.
00:51:04Oh yeah? Here, you want it? For free.
00:51:07Ew, I don't want that trash from a stinky hippie peddler.
00:51:11Well, that's too bad then, because you are the fraud.
00:51:17What are you talking about?
00:51:19Who the hell are you to accuse me?
00:51:21Throw them out.
00:51:23Dr. Wilson, I know you're a legend in medicine,
00:51:25but we're professionals.
00:51:27Oh yeah?
00:51:29And that armband sells for five million dollars?
00:51:32Yeah, mine is the real thing.
00:51:35You two are just upset because you're too poor to afford our luxury items.
00:51:40Why is that so?
00:51:42When a so-called expert failed to recognize Queen Victoria's ring then?
00:51:45Dear Lord, this is real.
00:51:49It's authentic.
00:51:51It's Queen Victoria's ring.
00:51:53Hey!
00:51:56Cameron, what have you found?
00:51:59Yeah, that picture of Cleopatra's armband you sent me? It's a replica.
00:52:04I had the same one right here at the flea market.
00:52:08So, you are the fraud.
00:52:12You just went to the flea market so you can buy some fakes.
00:52:15And Cameron, how much are these fakes being sold for?
00:52:19One-fifty.
00:52:20Wow. Not even five dollars. Sandra.
00:52:25You've been deeping us the whole time?
00:52:28Arrest her!
00:52:30No! Please! He was just a splinter! Please!
00:52:34What's going on, Dr. Wilson?
00:52:36Uh, investigating lead poisoning from cheap jewelry for the Emperor of Japan. Bye.
00:52:41Black Callista from the jewelry industry forever.
00:52:51I had a really great time tonight.
00:52:54Me too. May I have a kiss?
00:53:12Something wrong?
00:53:14Do you always have gum in your mouth?
00:53:21Yep. You never have to worry about stinky breath from me.
00:53:34You owe us a bunch of money, Cooper.
00:53:39I don't have any money.
00:53:41How did you pay for this hotel then?
00:53:43I guess you'll only pay up if I break your other leg.
00:53:50Stop!
00:53:54Mr. Vanderbilt.
00:53:58Mr. Buffett.
00:54:03This is the contract for the Maple Plaza project.
00:54:06That's right. Miss Musk wanted me to give it to you.
00:54:08I knew Angela was still in love with me.
00:54:11I knew Angela was still in love with me.
00:54:14Sorry about those injuries from earlier. It was all just a misunderstanding.
00:54:19Yeah, we could be partners again.
00:54:22And then maybe you can tell Lady Lockhart to put in a good word for us?
00:54:28Angela still loves me. She's just throwing a fit. She'll be back to me soon enough.
00:54:33Do you need any help winning her back?
00:54:35Yeah, do you need any help winning her back? We can give you jewelry to give to her.
00:54:40I was just sucking up to these pricks a few days ago, and now they're all begging me to help them out.
00:54:46It feels so damn good to be in power.
00:54:49Sure. I'll put in a good word for you.
00:54:53I just need...
00:54:54Anything. You tell us, we'll give you anything.
00:54:57Once I take everything from these idiots, I'll go after Angela Lockhart for my revenge.
00:55:06I'm giving the contract to Jared Cooper, just like you asked me to.
00:55:10Well done. He'll be fucked soon.
00:55:13Well done. He'll be fucked soon.
00:55:16I don't get it, Ms. Musk.
00:55:18That contract has a preliminary clause. It requires him to pay 50% of the costs up front as a deposit.
00:55:24And if he can't, then what?
00:55:26He'll be bankrupt.
00:55:28So as long as he's grieving, I have to take it.
00:55:31I'm avenging my best friend.
00:55:33I'm avenging my best friend.
00:55:36I want to show the world that without Angela Lockhart, he's nothing.
00:55:45I signed the Maple Plaza project.
00:55:48We should celebrate.
00:55:50You did?
00:55:52You see, I know my son has it in him.
00:55:54That skank Angela is nothing next to you.
00:55:57And it's all thanks to you, sweetheart.
00:56:00Actually, it's thanks to Angela.
00:56:04What?
00:56:07You're trying to ditch me to go back to your wife?
00:56:10Oh, no, no, no. He's not.
00:56:12Jared, what are you doing?
00:56:14You have such a beautiful and bright future ahead of you.
00:56:17It's my decision, Mom. I'm the head of the house here.
00:56:21I'm telling my dad.
00:56:23Fine. Go right ahead. He has enough problems himself.
00:56:26If you're obedient, I'll keep you around as a side piece.
00:56:29But if not, you can scram.
00:56:30Dad, Jared is being mean to me. Teach him a lesson.
00:56:36Kaylee, be a good girl, okay?
00:56:38Jared has the backing of some very powerful people now.
00:56:42Don't get on his bad side.
00:56:44We can't afford to piss him off.
00:56:46So do as he says.
00:56:48But Dad...
00:56:55I'm sorry.
00:56:57For your side piece.
00:56:58Very good. I'm happy you've come around.
00:57:01Now, let's go celebrate.
00:57:05I mean, do I really want to be with Mr. Minty Mouth forever, though?
00:57:10But that tongue action, though...
00:57:12Tongue is important.
00:57:14In more than just one spot.
00:57:16Ellen, we are in public.
00:57:18That's true.
00:57:20Stomachache.
00:57:22Again?
00:57:24I have to run to the bathroom.
00:57:26Devin should be here to pick you up soon.
00:57:29Not a good sign for a date.
00:57:33This hotel restaurant has five Michelin stars.
00:57:37It's her.
00:57:39And she's alone. With no one to save her.
00:57:43You whore.
00:57:45You seduced my son so he'd get back with you.
00:57:51Let me tell you.
00:57:53I would never go back even if your entire family got down on their knees and begged me.
00:57:59No!
00:58:01Hey, you guys can fight all you want.
00:58:03But you need to take this somewhere else.
00:58:05Whoever gets rid of her for me gets all this.
00:58:08Plus, why do I have to leave? She's the one starting shit.
00:58:11Because I have money and you don't.
00:58:13You're just a stinky hippie peddler.
00:58:16And my son just signed a 100 billion dollar contract.
00:58:20He still got the contract?
00:58:22Hmm. Must be Ellen's doing.
00:58:24Even if he does sign it, he doesn't have the liquidity to pay the deposit up front.
00:58:29He's just gonna...
00:58:31Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
00:58:34Bet you've never seen this much cash before.
00:58:39You take my charity and toss it in my face as if it's your own.
00:58:44My maid wouldn't even pick up such a pitiful amount.
00:58:47One thousand dollars to take her away.
00:58:50Two thousand dollars to drag her away.
00:58:52Five thousand dollars to beat her away.
00:58:58Oh! Oh! Hey! Hey!
00:59:01Ow! Hey!
00:59:04You okay? Are you hurt?
00:59:10Weakling.
00:59:12You! You! Just a few days ago you found yourself a boy toy right after getting divorced.
00:59:17And now you have two more? What a whore.
00:59:20What a whore.
00:59:22Yeah. And Jared wanted to get back with her?
00:59:25What if she has an STD?
00:59:27Oh, like sleeping with a married man wouldn't give you an STD.
00:59:31Let's go. We'll expose her to Jared.
00:59:34Hang on.
00:59:36What do you want?
00:59:38I'll scream.
00:59:40I don't hit women. But I never said I don't kill women.
00:59:44But I never said I don't kill women. I said I don't kill women.
00:59:49Oh God. He is a murderer.
00:59:52What if he murders me?
00:59:54Not him. Definitely not him.
01:00:00We're not afraid of you.
01:00:02That's enough. This isn't a war zone.
01:00:05You'll be removed from being a five-star general if you hurt a civilian without adequate cause.
01:00:09I was just messing with them.
01:00:11Was he though?
01:00:13We're not afraid of you.
01:00:15Jared! You have to avenge us.
01:00:18Look at this slut. She's found two more boy toys. She's cheating on you.
01:00:20Don't get back with her.
01:00:22Oh, Mr. Cooper. It's you.
01:00:24I apologize for this scene.
01:00:26I'll toss out the potty crashes immediately so that you can go to your salvation banquet.
01:00:30Who did you say you were going to toss out?
01:00:32Who did you say you were going to toss out?
01:00:34The potty crashes.
01:00:38You have any idea who that is?
01:00:40That's my wife.
01:00:42We saved that hangout from the real skank over there.
01:00:45That's right. Know your place.
01:00:47Shut up.
01:00:48She's cheating on you.
01:00:51Know your place. You're just a side piece.
01:00:54If I still want you, that is.
01:00:56Eric, have you gone mad?
01:00:58This is Eric Vanderbilt's only daughter.
01:01:00You slap her for this whore?
01:01:02Mom!
01:01:04They really think there's something, huh?
01:01:06Angela's an heiress to a family whose wealth and status goes back to the Victorian age.
01:01:10She's richer even than Ellen Musk.
01:01:12I only got the Maple Plaza project because she gave it to me.
01:01:16What?
01:01:18You apologize right now or I will kick you and your father to the curb.
01:01:28I'm sorry.
01:01:30No.
01:01:32This can't be.
01:01:34I made you divorce...
01:01:38Go home.
01:01:40You're not suited to come with me to my celebration banquet.
01:01:48I apologize on behalf of my mother.
01:01:51Honey, I know you came here to celebrate my achievements.
01:01:55I promise no one will bother you anymore.
01:01:58I didn't come here for you.
01:02:00I'm on a date.
01:02:02A date with two men at the same time?
01:02:06She really is a whore.
01:02:08Angela, please forgive me.
01:02:10I really do love you.
01:02:13Oh-ho! Lady Lockhart is here!
01:02:15Lady Lockhart is here!
01:02:17Oh-ho! Lady Lockhart is here!
01:02:21Yeah, we already know you beat Ford's effort.
01:02:25We're too old for that.
01:02:27They're here for my celebration banquet.
01:02:29Please, you gave me the contract, so if anyone should go as my guest of honor, it should be you.
01:02:35Oh, yes, please, Miss Lockhart, join us.
01:02:37We'll all be one happy business family again.
01:02:41What the hell are you all doing here?
01:02:43Where were you?
01:02:45Stomach issues.
01:02:47Again? Would you like my diagnosis?
01:02:50No.
01:02:52Let me make myself clear, okay?
01:02:56I would rather die than be with you again.
01:03:00Seems that they're not actually on good terms.
01:03:03I can't lose face in front of these pricks.
01:03:06Otherwise, they'll cut me off, too.
01:03:08Angela, I know you're still mad, but please give me a chance. I'll prove it to you.
01:03:12You want a chance?
01:03:13Angela, no.
01:03:15You have three great guys here who all want to marry you.
01:03:18Don't take him back.
01:03:20I'll give you two choices.
01:03:23I'll give you two choices.
01:03:27Me, or the contract.
01:03:31You're kidding me.
01:03:33No, I'm not kidding you.
01:03:35If you choose me, we can remarry this week.
01:03:39But you don't get the hundred billion dollar contract.
01:03:41The choice is all yours.
01:03:44You think so?
01:03:47He either marries a royal heiress or gets a contract that takes his company to the moon.
01:03:51Either way, he benefits.
01:03:53Why can't I have both?
01:03:55You really are a greedy bastard.
01:03:58Angela, I saved you in the pool, remember? I deserve the contract.
01:04:02Did you really?
01:04:07Look who's fashionably late now.
01:04:10He didn't save her at the pool.
01:04:12Wait, what are you talking about?
01:04:15I choose the contract.
01:04:18I knew it. You'll get what's coming to you.
01:04:21With this contract, my company's earning potential is limitless.
01:04:26Angela Lockhart, you humiliated me in front of everyone. I will get you one day.
01:04:31Let me show you something.
01:04:39You saved me.
01:04:45You saved me.
01:04:51You saved me.
01:04:53I'm sorry if his lies led to you wasting three years of your life.
01:04:59But I promise you, I'm going to make it up to you with the rest of our lives.
01:05:04No, no, I wasn't lying. I just couldn't, can't remember exactly what happened that day.
01:05:17Does that mean we both each saved her once?
01:05:21What? Me? Dr. Wilson? Losing out to saving people? No way.
01:05:27You guys, one of you, do something life-threatening right now.
01:05:31You're crazy.
01:05:32You're crazy.
01:05:34And actually, they've all been doing horrible shit behind your back.
01:05:39What?
01:05:41Mr. Sterling had me investigate their company's dealings.
01:05:45Turns out they've been fudging the numbers on your shared accounts and contracts.
01:05:48Put it simply, they've been stealing from you.
01:05:52I can't believe I didn't realize.
01:05:55Ms. Lockhart, I'm so sorry. I should have had third-party accountants check thoroughly.
01:05:59No, it's not your fault. They're just too slick.
01:06:03You like me to punish them for-
01:06:05Oh God, no. Not that again. Please.
01:06:08Max, you know what to do.
01:06:23The banks have pulled all of our funds.
01:06:26All business ties have been severed.
01:06:28We're bankrupt!
01:06:34How did you do that?
01:06:36Who are you? And don't say Spider-Man.
01:06:41I'll tell you who I am.
01:06:44I'll tell you who I am.
01:06:48I am Crypto Punk Number Two.
01:06:52What did he say he was?
01:06:54That's more bizarre than Spider-Man.
01:06:56You're Crypto Punk Number Two?
01:06:59Well, I'm Crypto Punk Number One.
01:07:02See? You are number one at something.
01:07:04The most expensive NFT collection in the world.
01:07:07Forget Forbes' list.
01:07:09It's all about young money now.
01:07:11So, how about our date?
01:07:19I'm not letting anyone off me on this one.
01:07:21I'll spy too.
01:07:26Ugh!
01:07:35They forgot to cancel my contract.
01:07:38I still have the 100 billion dollar project.
01:07:42Yes! I'm rich!
01:07:45I'm going to make them all pay soon!
01:07:53What?
01:07:55Sir, sir. The Maple Plaza contract requires us to provide 50% of the costs up front.
01:08:00Otherwise, it's a breach of contract and we'll have to pay for all financial repercussions.
01:08:05No!
01:08:07I'm bankrupt!
01:08:09I need a little locker.
01:08:11You tricked me!
01:08:17Allow me.
01:08:21I'm sorry I was late, my queen.
01:08:22I had to get some very important materials for our special date.
01:08:29Well, cheers.
01:08:31Cheers.
01:08:40This looks good.
01:08:46Did you use my spices?
01:08:49I know your ex-in-law has never appreciated you.
01:08:53You can have all the money and power in the world and you still can't force a man to love you.
01:09:00I couldn't even remember our anniversary.
01:09:06Angela, your future with me is going to be different.
01:09:15Come on.
01:09:17Upstairs.
01:09:23Come on.
01:09:36Wow.
01:09:38Devon, I can't believe this is what I've been missing out on these past few years.
01:09:43Just because of some silly mistake.
01:09:46Angela, I've known and loved you for three whole years.
01:09:50Actually, I've also loved you for three years.
01:09:55That's right. I fell in love with you three years ago, too.
01:09:59How is all of this possible?
01:10:02I didn't meet any of you until recently.
01:10:05Well, actually, maybe Devon, but...
01:10:09I've had a crush on you since college.
01:10:12You were my motivation to go to business school.
01:10:16Despite who you were, you never judged me for being poor.
01:10:21Are you trying to get hired at Fortune 500 in a suit like that?
01:10:29All you do is babble on and on about Internet money, Bitcoin and shit like that.
01:10:37Are you trying to steal my spot?
01:10:41I'll teach you a lesson.
01:10:44Hey! Get away from me!
01:10:46Get away from me!
01:10:47Angela!
01:10:50Feisty girl. I like her.
01:11:02How is he?
01:11:04It's a rare poison made from a mixture of dried roots found in Africa.
01:11:08Ashtagar saltif.
01:11:10Can it be cured?
01:11:12I actually think I know that poison.
01:11:13It sounds really scary, but its cure can actually be found in any developed country.
01:11:17Household salt.
01:11:25I like her.
01:11:28There you go.
01:11:30Time is up.
01:11:33Oh, shoot. I'm late for swim practice.
01:11:36I like her.
01:11:38We have been rivals ever since.
01:11:41So, that's how I, well, we all met.
01:11:47I barely remember.
01:11:49I should have never let you go to swim practice that day.
01:11:52Matthew Richards, the guy who poisoned me, attacked you out of revenge.
01:11:57You wouldn't have known.
01:11:59I did hear you dropped out and became a loan shark, though.
01:12:00That makes you feel better.
01:12:02Yeah, I think that suits him a little better.
01:12:05Angela, your seven days is almost up.
01:12:08Now that you know they all loved and fought for you for three years,
01:12:12who will you pick?
01:12:18How can that be?
01:12:20Angela Lockhart is an heiress?
01:12:23Kaylee, we've gone bankrupt.
01:12:27Bankrupt?
01:12:29The Vanderbilt's have gone bankrupt?
01:12:32Well, then, get out of here.
01:12:35You can't do this to me.
01:12:39Jared.
01:12:41Mom, it's me.
01:12:43What happened?
01:12:45Jared, I have found you.
01:12:48What?
01:12:49It's me.
01:12:51What happened?
01:12:53Jared, I have carefully reconsidered.
01:12:56Angela is way better than this dimwit.
01:12:58You should get back with your wife.
01:13:00We're bankrupt.
01:13:02What?
01:13:05Jared Cooper.
01:13:08We're here to recompose your belongings.
01:13:12No one is going to save you now.
01:13:15What?
01:13:19What kind of an asshole throws his own mother to the dogs?
01:13:25Who will you pick?
01:13:29I...
01:13:35I brought you fried chicken.
01:13:37Hey, not all girls like sushi and caviar.
01:13:40Yeah, he's right. I did live in Atlanta for three months.
01:13:43Sucking up last minute.
01:13:45At least I don't speak like an AI robot.
01:13:47Hey, stop. Stop.
01:13:50Welcome back to the bachelorette.
01:13:53I mean, the three badasses who want me.
01:13:56I mean, Angela Lockhart.
01:13:59You know what I mean.
01:14:01Today, our heiress bachelorette will choose
01:14:04which one of our three badasses will she marry.
01:14:08Will it be Shane, the doctor?
01:14:12Cole, the general?
01:14:15Or Devin, the CEO?
01:14:21Looks like our bachelorette may need a little more time to decide.
01:14:25Oh, the suspense is killing me.
01:14:28But when she does, she will take this eternal rose
01:14:32made from glass imported from Venice
01:14:34and give it to our winner.
01:14:36Angela.
01:14:39Angela.
01:14:41Oh, I...
01:14:43I need more time to think.
01:14:49While our bachelorette takes a little time to decide,
01:14:53why don't we check in with each of our candidates?
01:14:56Let's check in with each of our candidates.
01:14:59Let's start with Cole.
01:15:01Cole.
01:15:05There's not much to say.
01:15:07Who wouldn't want a five-star general
01:15:09Who wouldn't want a five-star general
01:15:11who has huge biceps,
01:15:13a massive chest,
01:15:15who would protect their wife?
01:15:20Okay, thank you.
01:15:22Uh, Shane?
01:15:25Muscles, money,
01:15:28they only get you so far.
01:15:30But you need a well-balanced man like me
01:15:32that has more than one way to keep a lady happy,
01:15:35if you know what I mean.
01:15:39Okay, I think we do.
01:15:41And Devin.
01:15:44That was quite disgusting.
01:15:48I just hope Angela's okay.
01:15:50I know she's going under a lot of stress right now,
01:15:53a lot of choices to make.
01:15:55And she's my queen.
01:15:57I just really hope she's okay.
01:15:59And one more thing.
01:16:01What kind of a doctor
01:16:03brings fried chicken to a girl?
01:16:05That's a good point.
01:16:07It's bad for her heart.
01:16:09And then you!
01:16:11Well, you know what they say about military men.
01:16:14They beat their wives.
01:16:20Enough!
01:16:23Stand up!
01:16:25Hey, you guys.
01:16:27Whoa, break it up!
01:16:29Hey!
01:16:31Break it up!
01:16:36Cut to commercial!
01:16:37Cut to commercial!
01:16:56This is the hardest decision
01:16:58I've ever had to make in my entire life.
01:17:01Who do I choose?
01:17:08Angela's marrying me!
01:17:10You're not stealing her from me.
01:17:12Oh yeah?
01:17:14I may be a doctor,
01:17:16but like I said,
01:17:18I know and possess
01:17:20the deadliest poisons in the world.
01:17:22What don't you have in that coat?
01:17:24Fruit flavored gum.
01:17:26I won't let you take Angela away from me.
01:17:28I'll fight you to the death.
01:17:30Don't forget about me.
01:17:32It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:17:38These stupid profile cards
01:17:40don't make any sense.
01:17:42They do not help.
01:17:44Who made these?
01:18:03It's time I reveal my true identity.
01:18:08I'm actually a part of the X-Men.
01:18:11And I have the power of
01:18:14telekinesis!
01:18:30We may have to work together to take him down.
01:18:38Oh my God.
01:18:43This battle within our heads
01:18:45is the most intense I've ever experienced.
01:18:47I may not be able to take them both down
01:18:49if they decide to team up.
01:18:51Hmm. Wintermate or Coolmate?
01:18:58You know,
01:19:00I've always really liked our guy.
01:19:02Really?
01:19:04I'm actually pretty self-conscious about it.
01:19:07I appreciate that.
01:19:10And you know,
01:19:12I've always really liked the way you talk.
01:19:15Really?
01:19:19What do you got for me?
01:19:21I've always really liked the way you chew gum.
01:19:25Yeah? That's fresh, right?
01:19:30You know, you're actually a really good doctor.
01:19:33You need me to look at you?
01:19:35Yeah, I got you.
01:19:37Angela's been kidnapped!
01:19:39Angela's been kidnapped!
01:19:41It was Jared Cooper!
01:19:43That fucker!
01:19:45We have to find her.
01:19:47Her ring.
01:19:49Her dad installed a GPS tracking mechanism
01:19:51on her ring just in case.
01:19:53Well, let's go then!
01:19:55My fiancé!
01:20:01Jared.
01:20:06What am I doing here?
01:20:08You destroyed me.
01:20:11And you took everything.
01:20:14What?
01:20:16I have nothing left.
01:20:18It's not my fault you're greedy.
01:20:20I wasn't greedy.
01:20:22Did you have sex with my wife?
01:20:24What?
01:20:26I'm not your wife anymore!
01:20:28Yeah, I know. You wouldn't take me back now.
01:20:30Not unless I get you pregnant with my child.
01:20:32This is illegal!
01:20:33I don't want your child to be away from its father.
01:20:35You won't have me arrested.
01:20:37You will take me back.
01:20:41Come on, bitch.
01:20:44I'll settle you down a little.
01:20:54You will be begging me to fuck you soon.
01:20:58Hey!
01:21:00Angela!
01:21:01Angela, come here!
01:21:05You're too late!
01:21:07I drugged her.
01:21:09She'll be dead soon unless...
01:21:11And yet, have you forgotten who I am?
01:21:13He really does have everything he was supposed to.
01:21:15Everything except for...
01:21:17Except for fruit-flavored gum. We get it already.
01:21:19Just save my boss!
01:21:27You're all good now.
01:21:29Oh, thank God.
01:21:31What do we do with that piece of shit?
01:21:33What? What are you going to do to me?
01:21:35Hey, stop! No!
01:21:39Enjoy your erectile dysfunction forever.
01:21:46Glad we didn't actually have that fight.
01:21:48Turns out he's the most dangerous of them all.
01:21:56So, who did you pick, sweetheart?
01:21:58We've invited the most important figures of the world to your wedding.
01:22:01The prince of Bhutan.
01:22:03And remember, we will kill ourselves if you don't choose.
01:22:11Welcome back to the finale of
01:22:14The Three Badasses Who Want Me.
01:22:16We're down to the wire.
01:22:18Literally, the wedding day.
01:22:20But who's the groom?
01:22:28Uh...
01:22:30Seems our heiress still hasn't decided.
01:22:33Any input from the parents?
01:22:36Maybe that will help sway our bachelorette's choice.
01:22:39Oh, this is exciting.
01:22:41Who should my daughter pick?
01:22:44Let me think.
01:22:46Who should my daughter pick?
01:22:48Who should my daughter pick?
01:22:50Who should my daughter pick?
01:22:52Who should my daughter pick?
01:22:54Who should my daughter pick?
01:22:56Who should my daughter pick?
01:22:58Who should my daughter pick?
01:23:02I like the doctor.
01:23:04He's cute.
01:23:06But the general looks like a strong fellow.
01:23:10And we can't forget about Devon Sterling,
01:23:13the one who's loved her the longest.
01:23:15Isn't that right, Devon?
01:23:17Angela.
01:23:23You are all three very fine gentlemen.
01:23:28And I'm really grateful for all of your love.
01:23:33But this was a really hard decision.
01:23:36And I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:23:41And I decided to devise one last challenge.
01:23:49I'm just kidding.
01:23:51I'm just as sick of this as you guys are.
01:23:53Each of our candidates have saved our main character.
01:23:58I mean, Bachelorette, once.
01:24:00They've all proven their undying love.
01:24:03So who gets to unlock Angela Lockhart's heart?
01:24:07Literally.
01:24:09Could it be the sexy and protective,
01:24:13general with a temper, Mr. Cole Eisenhower?
01:24:17Or the fun, wicked-minded, but kind of weird,
01:24:22Dr. Shane Wilson?
01:24:27And last but not least,
01:24:29could it be the richest man of them all,
01:24:32the man Angela would have married a long time ago,
01:24:35Mr. Devon Sterling?
01:24:40Gentlemen,
01:24:41it's been a pleasure getting to know you.
01:24:43As may the best man win.
01:24:46May the best man win.
01:24:49Drum roll, please.
01:24:53Gotta make you understand
01:24:56Never gonna give you up
01:24:58Never gonna let you down
01:25:00Never gonna run around and desert you
01:25:05Seriously, Ricky?
01:25:07I'm not gonna let you down
01:25:09Seriously, Ricky?
01:25:17I choose...
01:25:28I need the power of a strong man
01:25:31who is willing to know he can protect me.
01:25:34Who could resist those guys?
01:25:39Can I interest you in an F.D., Ellen?
01:25:42Would you like a full-body checkup?
01:25:56Shane, it's you. I'm lovesick for you.
01:26:00You like that minty flavor, don't you?
01:26:05It's that tongue action, ladies and gents.
01:26:08Ellen, be my new queen.
01:26:10I hope we can build together.
01:26:24It's always been you.
01:26:34I'll always love you.
01:26:38Let's give it up for those nine inches, everybody.
01:26:42Would you like a full-body checkup?
01:26:44Have you seen my murder weapons?
01:26:46I'll eat fruit-flavored gum for you.