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📖 "We Can Do Hard Things: Answers to Life's 20 Questions" is more than just a book—it’s a guide to resilience, self-discovery, and finding clarity in the chaos of life. Through raw insights, personal stories, and deep wisdom, this book tackles the 20 biggest questions we all face—about love, fear, purpose, and the courage to keep going.
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Short filmTranscript
00:00:30Oh, God.
00:00:32Hello?
00:00:37Cheryl, we have to talk about our birthday plans.
00:00:40I mean, it's only two days away, and we still haven't decided the perfect way to celebrate.
00:00:44So, I was thinking, maybe we could all take a trip to...
00:00:48Sue, um, I meant to tell you before, but I wanted to be sure.
00:00:52Um, I think I'm gonna spend my birthday with Jake.
00:00:55Uh, I'm gonna lose my virginity to him.
00:00:58You know, I want to surprise him.
00:01:00What? But you can't.
00:01:02I mean, I thought we were going to wait until marriage.
00:01:05Besides, you can't do that to us.
00:01:07You can't break tradition that way.
00:01:09This is bad.
00:01:11You know, I'm gonna tell Lexi.
00:01:13She's gonna be very unhappy about this.
00:01:22Come on, Lexi.
00:01:28Let's go.
00:01:37So, girls, what are we gonna do for our birthday?
00:01:40Sue, we have plenty of time to figure something out.
00:01:45But this is the big one-eight.
00:01:47I mean, every year since our moms met in the hospital, we've done something new and special.
00:01:51But this has to be newer and more special.
00:01:54So, what's something we've never done before?
00:01:57Mushrooms?
00:01:58No, not like that. Like something nice.
00:02:01Like maybe a trip.
00:02:03Like a mushroom trip?
00:02:05No.
00:02:07Sorry, Sue. I have a date.
00:02:10So do I.
00:02:12Sorry, Sue.
00:02:13Don't worry, Sue. We'll figure it out.
00:02:17Oh, flowers. Are these from you?
00:02:19Yeah, sure.
00:02:21Here you go.
00:02:23No card, but I thought I saw one.
00:02:26I didn't know how to put my feelings into words.
00:02:29I guess, um...
00:02:31you still make me nervous.
00:02:34Oh, Jake.
00:02:39I'm sorry.
00:02:41I'm sorry.
00:02:43Oh, Jake.
00:02:47Maybe I should come in and hang out for a minute.
00:02:50Uh, no, Jake. Not yet.
00:02:52When we do it, I want it to be really special.
00:02:55The best night of my life.
00:02:56It will be. I promise.
00:02:58It'll always be amazing.
00:03:00With you and me.
00:03:02Together.
00:03:05Jake, no. I have to go.
00:03:07I have to work on my art project.
00:03:10You know, I thought art was going to be a really easy elective,
00:03:13but I guess I should have taken more math.
00:03:16Uh, so you're going to come to my birthday, okay?
00:03:19The Saturday?
00:03:21Of course.
00:03:25Thanks.
00:03:27Okay. Bye.
00:03:35Bye.
00:03:43Oh, baby. You're so hot.
00:03:45I'm going to do you so good.
00:03:47Oh, yeah, baby.
00:03:49What was your name again?
00:03:50Rob. Sex guy.
00:03:55Lexi is so upset she's speechless.
00:03:59Yeah, right. I bet.
00:04:05Cheryl's losing her virginity on Saturday?
00:04:09Oh, no.
00:04:11Do not compute.
00:04:13Want to talk in person ASAP.
00:04:18Oh, huh. Hi.
00:04:20When did you get home?
00:04:23So, is it true?
00:04:24Yes, it is.
00:04:26It's just, it's the right time and Jake's the right man.
00:04:30I mean, he's handsome and smart and wealthy
00:04:35and he has a really bright future ahead of him.
00:04:37So, I just think it's the right time.
00:04:40Lexi, tell her.
00:04:41Losing our virginity is one of those milestones
00:04:43we should all face together.
00:04:45On our birthday, yes, but not on this birthday.
00:04:47Like, maybe on our 23rd birthday.
00:04:49Or maybe even, like, our 29th.
00:04:52Eight. Maybe.
00:04:55Listen, guys, I know it's tradition,
00:04:58but I'm sorry.
00:05:03I know it's tradition, but I'm sorry.
00:05:11But, Cheryl, Sue is right.
00:05:14We do always do something special on our birthday.
00:05:16Does Jake really have such a tiny little needle dick?
00:05:20It's not Jake.
00:05:22It's the male ideal.
00:05:24Like a Greek god or Sue's dad.
00:05:28Right.
00:05:30Yeah, I guess you're right.
00:05:32I mean, it kind of sucks. I'm not really an artist.
00:05:34Girls, can you just stop changing the subject?
00:05:36The point is, we should all lose our virginities together
00:05:39on the same day, and I'm just not ready yet.
00:05:42I'm waiting for a sign, and then I'll know it's right.
00:05:45Look, I can go either way.
00:05:47I mean, I'm fine with just 69, 79, anal.
00:05:52I don't feel any rush to actually do the deed.
00:05:55Besides, I know it'll never live up to my rabbit anyway.
00:05:58But if you want to do it this year,
00:06:01then maybe we all should.
00:06:04You know, it could be like our big 18th birthday thing.
00:06:10Where are you going at 6.30 in the morning?
00:06:13To church, to pray for you.
00:06:15I want to be first in line.
00:06:17I'm getting this is...
00:06:19Yeah, me too.
00:06:23♪♪♪
00:06:29Forgive me, Father, for I have sinned.
00:06:31It has been four days since my last confession.
00:06:33I accuse myself of the following sins.
00:06:35Mm-hmm.
00:06:37Okay, so I'm really embarrassed to talk about this,
00:06:40but it's about sex.
00:06:43Mm-hmm.
00:06:45I mean, not me.
00:06:47I've never gone past second base with a guy.
00:06:49Mm-hmm.
00:06:51I've never even seen a guy's...
00:06:53Well, there was that one time I took the pants off my Ken doll,
00:06:56but I was dressing him up as Jesus,
00:06:58and I wanted to see his thing,
00:07:00but there was nothing there.
00:07:04Okay, so it's about my friends.
00:07:06My best friends.
00:07:08They're going to do something really bad this weekend.
00:07:10Okay.
00:07:12Third base.
00:07:14What? No.
00:07:16Like, sex. Like, intercourse.
00:07:18With boys, they barely even know.
00:07:20I mean, they really need us intervention,
00:07:22if you know what I mean.
00:07:24All the way. Go all the way.
00:07:26What are you...
00:07:28What?
00:07:30Ah!
00:07:32How could you do...
00:07:34You're a bad, bad person.
00:07:38What?
00:07:44Yes. Yes!
00:07:46Run! Run!
00:07:48Ah!
00:07:50Damn it!
00:07:52Fucking Yankees.
00:07:56Sorry.
00:08:18Sue, it is 1 p.m.
00:08:20Would you have a little consideration?
00:08:22I'm trying to sleep.
00:08:24Jeez, can you guys please keep it down?
00:08:28I have an announcement to make.
00:08:30I want to do it.
00:08:32Do you hear me? I want to do it.
00:08:34This weekend.
00:08:36On our birthday.
00:08:38Do what?
00:08:40It. Screw.
00:08:42You know, screwing, boning,
00:08:44making the beast with two backs.
00:08:46Shagging, fucking.
00:08:50You do.
00:08:52But what about all your religious stuff?
00:08:54And what about your sign from heaven?
00:08:56Oh, I got a sign at church.
00:08:58Really?
00:09:00Well, okay, great.
00:09:02We're all in then.
00:09:04So we'll have a big pool party
00:09:06and we'll do it there.
00:09:08Right?
00:09:10Right.
00:09:12I'll start making the shopping list.
00:09:16Okay.
00:09:22Hey, Frank.
00:09:24Hi, Sue.
00:09:26Guys, we didn't invite Frank to the party.
00:09:28I don't know. Do you think he'd even have fun?
00:09:30Yeah, he's blind.
00:09:32Blind people can do everything regular people can do.
00:09:38Maybe.
00:09:40Hey.
00:09:42I was wondering.
00:09:44It's tomorrow night. It's for our birthday.
00:09:46Do you want to come?
00:09:48Do you think he can see up my short?
00:10:00Well, the house looks done.
00:10:02Tomorrow's the big day.
00:10:04We finally turn 18.
00:10:06And finally lose our virginity.
00:10:08Well, we better get our beady sleep
00:10:10because the party starts tomorrow at 2.
00:10:12So, okay.
00:10:14We know who Cheryl's going to do it with, Jake.
00:10:16And I'll probably do that guy, Rod.
00:10:18But Sue, who are you going to pick to pop your chain?
00:10:20It's easy.
00:10:22I've known for the past six years,
00:10:24ever since catechism.
00:10:26What the fuck is catechism?
00:10:28I think it's a baby panda
00:10:30wrapped in peanut butter.
00:10:38My soulmate.
00:10:42Chris?
00:10:44Sue, you, um,
00:10:46might want to think about picking a backup.
00:10:48I mean...
00:10:50What? No. Chris is perfect.
00:10:52He played Jesus in Jesus Christ Superstar last year at camp.
00:10:54Plus, his name's Chris. It's a sign.
00:10:56Sue, the only sign
00:10:58is that Chris has a major case
00:11:00of gay face.
00:11:02What? He does not.
00:11:04Anyway, there's no such thing as gay face.
00:11:06He looks just like Justin Bieber
00:11:08with a little bit of Zac Efron
00:11:10Just a hint of Ryan Seacrest.
00:11:12Who the fuck's Ryan Seacrest?
00:11:14Look, Chris is my soulmate.
00:11:16Okay, well,
00:11:18sweet dreams.
00:11:20See you in the morning.
00:11:28I knew it would happen someday.
00:11:30I just didn't expect it to happen so soon.
00:11:40You're so perfect.
00:12:10I knew that's what I look like.
00:12:40Too bad no one could ever compare to you.
00:13:02Tomorrow's the day.
00:13:04Tomorrow's the day.
00:13:06Tomorrow's the day.
00:13:08Tomorrow's the day.
00:13:30Oh, my gosh.
00:13:32They're coming.
00:13:34Lexi, Cheryl, hurry!
00:13:38Ew, why?
00:13:40It's for Jake to unwrap me.
00:13:42It's gonna be really sexy. I'm gonna spritz it.
00:13:44You're gonna die of asphyxiation.
00:13:46It's gonna be really sexy.
00:13:48It's stupid. Just screw him.
00:13:50That's what he wants. That's what all guys want.
00:13:52Who hurt you as a child?
00:13:54Oh, Christ. Can I have your mouth, too?
00:13:56Anyway,
00:13:58what guys want is someone who's sexy,
00:14:00not someone they can just have sex with.
00:14:02You're an idiot.
00:14:04A very smooth, plastic wrapped idiot.
00:14:08Guys, seriously, come on. Hurry up.
00:14:14Oh, what a cool bracelet.
00:14:16I love it.
00:14:18Um...
00:14:20You should put that down, though, because it's like...
00:14:22It's very fragile.
00:14:24Yeah.
00:14:26Hurry up.
00:14:28Those are your anal beads, right?
00:14:30Yeah.
00:14:36♪♪♪
00:14:38♪♪♪
00:14:40♪♪♪
00:14:42♪♪♪
00:14:44♪♪♪
00:14:46♪♪♪
00:14:48♪♪♪
00:14:50Whoa!
00:14:52Hold up.
00:14:54We're gonna have some fun.
00:14:56Oh, attack of the wet T-shirts. Nice!
00:14:58Ha-ha-ha!
00:15:00Oh, fuck.
00:15:02Check, check, check, check.
00:15:04Check.
00:15:06Happy birthday, Lex.
00:15:08Oh, Joanna,
00:15:10we said no gifts.
00:15:12That is lip poison
00:15:14to plump your lips, but be careful.
00:15:16It stings. And the other one is
00:15:18edible massage oil.
00:15:20Oh, how did you know?
00:15:22I mean, I'm gonna use both of these tonight.
00:15:24♪♪♪
00:15:26♪♪♪
00:15:28Foster,
00:15:30you're such a cutie.
00:15:32Please don't touch my service tie.
00:15:34All right, sorry. Are you okay now?
00:15:36Yeah, I'm fine, thank you. Okay.
00:15:38See you later.
00:15:40I can't believe
00:15:42you haven't heard of it. This is crazy.
00:15:44Jake! Hi!
00:15:46Hey, babe.
00:15:48Happy birthday.
00:15:50Oh, you didn't have to give me
00:15:52anything. What?
00:15:54You want a beer?
00:15:58No.
00:16:00Oh, hon.
00:16:02Yeah.
00:16:04I have your present here.
00:16:06I'll give it to you later
00:16:08when the time's right.
00:16:10You didn't have to give me anything.
00:16:12And I have a present for you
00:16:14that I want you to unwrap
00:16:16later.
00:16:18Hey, Ralph,
00:16:20we need you to settle this bet over here real quick.
00:16:22What bet?
00:16:26All right, this is my man right here.
00:16:28Hey. How you doing?
00:16:30Hi.
00:16:40Check it out!
00:16:42Dare me?
00:16:46Woo-hoo!
00:16:54That's so cute!
00:16:56Look at the doggie.
00:17:00Oh, dude, look at those.
00:17:02Are those real?
00:17:04Have you guys seen Cheryl?
00:17:06Hey! Dude, move!
00:17:08Oh, all right. Okay. I'll see you guys later.
00:17:10Go do some push-ups or something.
00:17:1220 bucks says by the end of the day
00:17:14I will be motorboating those titties.
00:17:16Yeah!
00:17:18They're fake anyways.
00:17:20Who cares?
00:17:22Okay.
00:17:24Hey.
00:17:26I'm blind, you fucking asshole.
00:17:30Dude, no.
00:17:32It's your birthday. Here, let me.
00:17:34Joanna, no. Just go enjoy the party.
00:17:36What?
00:17:38I win.
00:17:40Hey.
00:17:42Do my lips look any plumper?
00:17:44I put this stuff on, but I can't really feel anything yet.
00:17:46Have you guys seen Jake?
00:17:48I haven't seen him anywhere.
00:17:50He just, like, disappeared.
00:17:54Okay.
00:18:02Are these real?
00:18:04Of course they are.
00:18:06How come I've never met you before?
00:18:08I don't know. Maybe he's gonna be around.
00:18:10Ryan, have you seen Jake?
00:18:12Um, I think he's around or something.
00:18:14Maybe upstairs. I don't know.
00:18:16Oh.
00:18:18Maybe he went to go get my birthday present.
00:18:20That's probably where he went.
00:18:22Oh.
00:18:24Liquid courage?
00:18:26Yeah.
00:18:28Atta girl.
00:18:32Vodka cranberry?
00:18:34Shirley Temple.
00:18:36Well, I guess it's now or never.
00:18:38I gotta go meet Rod.
00:18:40Sue? Are you okay?
00:18:42Sue? Relax.
00:18:44They're just lies.
00:18:46Okay, nothing to be scared of. Seriously.
00:18:48It's gonna be fine.
00:18:50Can I press here?
00:18:56Wow, it's even worse in person, isn't it?
00:18:58No. He does not have gay face.
00:19:00I'm gonna prove it to you.
00:19:02I'm gonna do it.
00:19:08Wow, it's even worse in person, isn't it?
00:19:10No.
00:19:12He does not have gay face.
00:19:14I'm gonna prove it to you.
00:19:16I'm gonna do it. I'm gonna do this.
00:19:18Good luck.
00:19:20Oh, God.
00:19:22Hey, you can do this.
00:19:24Just act like a slut.
00:19:28Just pretend you're Lexi.
00:19:38Yeah, my favorite chapter is Psalm and Glory.
00:19:40Chris.
00:19:42Hi.
00:19:44Can I talk to you?
00:19:46In private?
00:19:48No.
00:20:00Hey, Lexi.
00:20:02You're Lexi.
00:20:04What?
00:20:06Chris, you're so sexy.
00:20:08Ever since you played Jesus at camp,
00:20:10I've just...
00:20:12I've known that we were meant to be together.
00:20:14And I really want to...
00:20:16Oh, what are you doing?
00:20:18Is that wrong?
00:20:20Sue, what's gotten into you?
00:20:22Nothing. I'm sorry.
00:20:24I don't know how to do this.
00:20:26Sue.
00:20:28Sue, Sue, Sue.
00:20:30I understand
00:20:32these urges.
00:20:34And, you know,
00:20:36I like you, too.
00:20:38Really? You do?
00:20:40I do. I really do.
00:20:42It's just...
00:20:44I've devoted a lot of my life
00:20:46to one certain man.
00:20:48Right.
00:20:50Lexi said you were...
00:20:52Jesus.
00:20:54Oh, Batman.
00:20:56Of course.
00:20:58What did you think?
00:21:00Oh, nothing.
00:21:02So we can still do this, then?
00:21:04Oh, Sue.
00:21:06You know,
00:21:08for me,
00:21:10when I think about that man
00:21:12who died for our sins,
00:21:14when I think about him
00:21:16up there on that cross,
00:21:18so helpless,
00:21:20yet so
00:21:22muscular,
00:21:24with his strong
00:21:26thighs
00:21:28crossed over each other
00:21:30so delicately
00:21:32beneath that ragged
00:21:34loincloth
00:21:36growing so hot,
00:21:38so sweaty
00:21:40under that hot,
00:21:42hot sun,
00:21:44I just feel such
00:21:46compassion.
00:21:48I think about those things, too.
00:21:50So you understand
00:21:52why I can't do this?
00:21:54Not really.
00:21:56I just find it too hard.
00:21:58It is to give in
00:22:00to carnal pleasure when
00:22:02he sacrificed so much for us.
00:22:04So...
00:22:08Tch.
00:22:16We're gonna go out there, right?
00:22:18Yeah, totally.
00:22:20Whoa!
00:22:22Have you seen Jake?
00:22:24No. No.
00:22:26All right.
00:22:28Okay. All right. Focus.
00:22:30Focus. Focus.
00:22:32Oh.
00:22:36Oh, there he is.
00:22:40Oh, he got me the puppy
00:22:42that I wanted.
00:22:54How could you?
00:22:56Sue,
00:22:58what happened?
00:23:00Did you guys do it?
00:23:02Sue?
00:23:04He doesn't want me.
00:23:06Because he's gay.
00:23:08No, he's not. He just really loves Jesus.
00:23:10Oh, come on, Sue.
00:23:12The only reason you even liked him
00:23:14is because you knew he was never
00:23:16a real possibility for you?
00:23:18Look, the only way
00:23:20you're gonna find out what kind of man you really want
00:23:22is to know what kind of woman
00:23:24you really are deep inside.
00:23:26What?
00:23:28Come with me.
00:23:30Where?
00:23:32To meet your dark side.
00:23:38Out.
00:23:40Everyone out.
00:23:50Sue, it's time
00:23:52to meet face-to-face.
00:24:04I really can't.
00:24:06I really don't think I can do this.
00:24:08I'm not letting you out
00:24:10until you look.
00:24:14I'm not letting you out until you look.
00:24:18Sue?
00:24:20Can you see it?
00:24:22Sue?
00:24:26I'm almost...
00:24:28I'm almost there.
00:24:32Ugh!
00:24:34What?
00:24:36What? Sue, what happened?
00:24:38What did you see?
00:24:40A raccoon?
00:24:42What?
00:24:44You overshot it. Aim the mirror further up.
00:24:50I can't.
00:24:52Please don't make me do that again.
00:24:54Okay, fine. Fine.
00:24:56I didn't want to do this,
00:24:58but you leave me no choice.
00:25:00What?
00:25:02You really need an orgasm.
00:25:04Honestly, I don't know how you expected
00:25:06to ever have sex with someone else
00:25:08when you've never even had it with yourself.
00:25:10This really has to be your first step.
00:25:12Lex, I'm waiting.
00:25:14Coming. Sue, my black vibrator is somewhere in the top drawer.
00:25:16Just find it and use it.
00:25:18Wait, what does the black vibrator look like?
00:25:20It's black. It vibrates.
00:25:24Come on, Rod. Let's go to Sue's room.
00:25:28And don't come back until you have at least one orgasm.
00:25:42Hey, cutie! Cutie!
00:25:45Oh!
00:25:47Bullseye!
00:25:49Yeah!
00:25:53Bang. Bang.
00:25:55Bang. Bang.
00:25:57Good boy. Straighten up.
00:25:59Good boy. Good boy.
00:26:01He knows over 100 commands.
00:26:05I'm sorry. I can't see anything.
00:26:07That is not funny, Cheryl.
00:26:09What a bitch.
00:26:11Fortunately, when you're blind,
00:26:13you get used to things like that.
00:26:15Ah!
00:26:41Oh, shit.
00:26:46What's wrong with this thing?
00:27:05Cheryl, what is wrong?
00:27:07Lexi, it's Jake.
00:27:09He was getting a blowjob
00:27:11by some pink-eared girl.
00:27:13For sure?
00:27:15I mean, I know I've been putting off having sex with him,
00:27:17so maybe it's my fault.
00:27:19That's no excuse. He's a dirtbag.
00:27:21How dare he?
00:27:23No, it's awful.
00:27:25I mean, I thought I was gonna marry him.
00:27:31It's a text.
00:27:33It's from him. I can't bear myself to read it.
00:27:35Okay.
00:27:37He's looking for you.
00:27:39He wants to give you your birthday gift.
00:27:41I can't face him.
00:27:43Um, I have to go. I'm going.
00:27:45No, you can't just leave.
00:27:47Well, I can't stay and just pretend like nothing happened.
00:27:49I mean, maybe I should confront him.
00:27:51No. He'll either deny it
00:27:53or admit and promise never to do it again.
00:27:55Either way, it's bullshit.
00:27:57I see only one option.
00:27:59I'm leaving.
00:28:01Revenge sex.
00:28:03What? What does that even mean?
00:28:05It means you find a guy, you screw his brains out,
00:28:07and you let Jake catch you.
00:28:09But he... I mean, he doesn't even care.
00:28:11He doesn't even care about me. I mean, why would...
00:28:13He's just into other girls.
00:28:15Trust me. He'll care.
00:28:17Seriously, this is the worst thing you could do to him.
00:28:19To his ego.
00:28:21To screw someone else when you've never even had sex with him.
00:28:23Especially if it's with someone smarter,
00:28:25better-looking, and with a bigger dick.
00:28:29I'm leaving.
00:28:31I'm leaving.
00:28:33I'm leaving.
00:28:35I'm leaving.
00:28:37So, what exactly are you going to do with Jake?
00:28:39No, I couldn't.
00:28:41Plus, I mean, there's no one smarter
00:28:43and better looking.
00:28:45Eric! He's perfect.
00:28:47Eric Hall? Are you kidding?
00:28:49I mean, he wouldn't even be into me
00:28:51if he likes your type.
00:28:53Really? And what type is that?
00:28:55He's slutty.
00:28:57Yeah. Trust me, he's amazing.
00:28:59I fooled around with him once. He has this great tongue ring.
00:29:01Oh, no.
00:29:03I could never fool around with somebody you've fooled around with.
00:29:05Okay, then. Fine.
00:29:06We will find someone else.
00:29:08Someone that I haven't fooled around with.
00:29:11Oh, no.
00:29:14Okay, what does it matter that I fooled around with him?
00:29:16I mean, it's like you're not gonna marry the guy.
00:29:18Mm, no, I just couldn't do it.
00:29:21Fine. If you want to live the rest of your life
00:29:23knowing that you had one chance to do the right thing,
00:29:25to make your boyfriend feel like a total worthless piece of garbage
00:29:29and possibly even scar him with the rest of his existence
00:29:31and you chose not to do it, go ahead.
00:29:34But honestly, I don't know how you'll be able to live with yourself.
00:29:38I don't know.
00:29:41But honestly, I don't know how you'll be able to live with yourself.
00:29:46I don't know.
00:29:47Trust me. It's going to work.
00:29:54I will intercept Jake and get him upstairs.
00:29:58Hi, Cheryl.
00:30:01Oh, no.
00:30:05Hey.
00:30:06Ha, happy birthday.
00:30:09Thanks.
00:30:25Oh, no.
00:30:26I'm so sorry.
00:30:27No, no, no.
00:30:28No, no, no.
00:30:29No, no, no.
00:30:30No, no, no.
00:30:31No, no, no.
00:30:32No, no, no.
00:30:33Have you guys seen Jake?
00:30:44So, happy birthday.
00:30:48Uh, do you know that most people think that the happy birthday song was from Britain,
00:30:54but it's actually from us, U.S. America?
00:31:00United States?
00:31:01I know where we live.
00:31:03Right.
00:31:04Of course.
00:31:05Hey, Jesus, Eric, are you going to make your move or not?
00:31:18You want me to move?
00:31:19Yeah, no, I can totally move.
00:31:20I just...
00:31:21No, you're fine.
00:31:34Jake!
00:31:35So, Eric, do you want to do it or not?
00:31:39Oh, I'm sorry.
00:31:41It?
00:31:42What, um...
00:31:43It.
00:31:44Like, monkey bone in, and like, pigs in a blanket, get real nasty.
00:31:50Oh!
00:31:51Oh, you mean like, uh, right now?
00:31:55I mean, well, yeah.
00:31:57You know, the sooner the better.
00:32:00Yeah, sure.
00:32:01I mean, yeah, of course.
00:32:02Um, I just never realized that you...
00:32:05I mean, whew, uh...
00:32:10It's just...
00:32:13You're so...
00:32:15You're so beautiful.
00:32:17Okay, um...
00:32:19Uh, no kissing.
00:32:21Right, um, of course.
00:32:24Sorry.
00:32:27So, um...
00:32:29Do you want to unwrap me?
00:32:31Oh, wow.
00:32:32Uh, you wrapped up like a Hot Pocket, or a leftover macaroni and cheese.
00:32:37Now that you're leftover, you're not.
00:32:39Uh, you're fresh.
00:32:43Now that you're leftover, you're not.
00:32:45Uh, you're fresh.
00:32:47Organic.
00:32:49Yep.
00:32:51So, the wrap.
00:32:52Right.
00:32:54Um, where's the, uh...
00:32:57It's, uh, the end is...
00:32:58The edge is, like, right over here.
00:32:59Oh, oh, yeah, here it is.
00:33:00Yeah.
00:33:01I see it.
00:33:02Um, let me just, uh...
00:33:03Got it.
00:33:04Uh...
00:33:05Ow, ow, ow.
00:33:06Oh, sorry.
00:33:07Sorry, sorry.
00:33:08I, um...
00:33:09It's okay.
00:33:10Do it again.
00:33:11Sorry, I, uh...
00:33:13I bit my nails, so it's a little difficult to...
00:33:15You know what?
00:33:16Let me just lay you on the bed.
00:33:18Okay.
00:33:23Uh, let me just see.
00:33:27Oh, here it is.
00:33:28I got it.
00:33:29All right, just, um, pull it.
00:33:31Let me just...
00:33:32Ah!
00:33:33Oh!
00:33:34Oh, geez.
00:33:35Uh, Cheryl, are you...
00:33:37Are you okay?
00:33:38Help!
00:33:39Uh...
00:33:41Hey, Cheryl, are you okay?
00:33:43Ow, ow, ow.
00:33:45Oh, geez.
00:33:46Here.
00:33:47There.
00:33:52Well, that was stupid.
00:33:55Yeah.
00:34:01How you doing tonight?
00:34:02I'm good.
00:34:03Are you having a good time?
00:34:04Yeah?
00:34:05Good?
00:34:06Jake, I think I saw Cheryl upstairs.
00:34:08What?
00:34:09I can't hear you.
00:34:11I need another beer.
00:34:13Chips are so damn salty.
00:34:14Jake!
00:34:15It's very weird.
00:34:16Upstairs.
00:34:17Yeah.
00:34:18Hold on.
00:34:19Take a piss.
00:34:21How much beer?
00:34:35Oh.
00:34:36Oh.
00:34:37Oh.
00:34:38Oh.
00:34:39Oh.
00:34:40Oh.
00:34:41Oh.
00:34:42Oh.
00:34:43Finally, I uh, let me just get the blinds.
00:34:53Oh no no no no no no, um, don't, don't worry about it.
00:34:57What?
00:34:58I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:35:02Oh, well okay.
00:35:06Okay.
00:35:07Um, I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:35:26Um, I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:35:32Okay.
00:35:33Okay.
00:35:34Um, I mean, I want us to be able to see each other.
00:36:03Okay.
00:36:09Okay.
00:36:14Uhhhh.
00:36:22What are you doing?
00:36:23Uh, I think it's time, you know, to do it.
00:36:30Um, not yet.
00:36:31More foreplay.
00:36:32Oh.
00:36:39So good.
00:36:41Oh.
00:36:43Yep.
00:36:44Oh, my jaw.
00:36:46Jaw, jaw, jaw.
00:36:48What? What?
00:36:50Oh.
00:36:52Lock jaw, lock jaw.
00:36:54Is that even a thing?
00:36:56I don't know.
00:36:58Ah.
00:37:01Are you okay?
00:37:05No, no, no, no, no.
00:37:07It's fine.
00:37:09I'm just embarrassed.
00:37:11It's probably TMJ
00:37:13or fracture, swollen.
00:37:15You sure you're okay?
00:37:17Yeah, yeah, I'm fine.
00:37:19Okay, great. Have fun.
00:37:21Oh.
00:37:23Ah.
00:37:25Now.
00:37:27Now. Let's do it now.
00:37:30All right, I'm gonna come.
00:37:32I'm gonna come. Are you ready?
00:37:34No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
00:37:36No, no, no, not yet.
00:37:38Lexi, Lexi.
00:37:40Oh.
00:37:42No, no, no, not yet.
00:37:44Lexi, Lexi.
00:37:46Oh.
00:37:48No means no.
00:37:50Oh, I'm so sorry.
00:37:52I'm sorry, I'm sorry. It's been a really long time
00:37:54and I haven't masqueraded
00:37:56for anything.
00:38:00Uh-oh.
00:38:02Oh, hey, Jake.
00:38:04Hey.
00:38:06How you doing?
00:38:08How's it going? Good.
00:38:10Eric? Come.
00:38:12Eric, help me. I'm blind. I can't see anything.
00:38:14Excuse me.
00:38:19Cheryl's in here.
00:38:25What's up, bro?
00:38:27Fuck.
00:38:29Hey, wait.
00:38:31Lex, babe.
00:38:33Still waiting.
00:38:39Oh, I'm sorry.
00:38:41I can't see. I'm blind.
00:38:43Damn it.
00:38:45I'm gonna say something to that bitch.
00:38:47Hey, you.
00:38:49You better stop making fun of the blind
00:38:51or I'm gonna teach you a lesson.
00:38:53Ow!
00:38:55I'm so sorry.
00:38:57I'll never make fun of the blind again.
00:39:19Oh!
00:39:21Oh, man.
00:39:23Oh, man. No more water balloons.
00:39:25This party's ass.
00:39:29Yeah!
00:39:33This just isn't working out.
00:39:35Huh?
00:39:37Nothing. What's the big deal about these vibrators anyway?
00:39:39Ugh!
00:39:41Lock your character, man.
00:39:43And watch this.
00:39:45Spark it up. Yes!
00:39:49Oh, man!
00:39:51I love this game.
00:39:53Where's the controllers?
00:39:55Here, here, here.
00:39:59Whoa!
00:40:01Look at this.
00:40:03Oh, my God.
00:40:05Oh, man.
00:40:07Get that thing away. Jesus.
00:40:15Hey, dude. Nice shot.
00:40:17Wasn't me.
00:40:21Whoa!
00:40:23Whoa! Nice!
00:40:25Are you sitting on me or something?
00:40:29Hey, you found the grenade launcher.
00:40:31Nice. Nice.
00:40:43Do you have the extra controller?
00:40:51Yeah.
00:40:55Whoa!
00:40:57You are the controller.
00:40:59No, I just...
00:41:01I didn't. I swear.
00:41:13Hey, hey, Sue.
00:41:15What's going on, man?
00:41:17It's okay.
00:41:19Hey, Sue.
00:41:31Hey, didn't you hear me calling you?
00:41:33Yeah, I just needed to...
00:41:35Oh, sure.
00:41:37Listen, Sue.
00:41:39I was rethinking
00:41:41what I said earlier.
00:41:43You were?
00:41:45Yeah.
00:41:47So you think we should give it a try?
00:41:51Can we go get a drink?
00:41:55Wow.
00:41:57Your toilet's really...
00:41:59You know what?
00:42:01I got to go.
00:42:03Happy birthday.
00:42:05No, Chris. No, that wasn't...
00:42:07I didn't...
00:42:09God, never mind.
00:42:15This is the worst idea ever.
00:42:17Never going to have sex.
00:42:19Ow.
00:42:45Hello?
00:42:47A little attention here.
00:42:49Oh, yeah. Sorry.
00:42:55Lex.
00:42:57Don't be selfish.
00:42:59Oh, right. Sorry.
00:43:11Ugh. Geez.
00:43:13Who invented
00:43:15this stupid position, anyway?
00:43:17Too much fucking multitasking.
00:43:19Screw it.
00:43:43Oh, Jesus.
00:44:01That was bad.
00:44:03That was so bad.
00:44:13Joanna.
00:44:15Do you know a guy named JJ?
00:44:19I think that guy's name
00:44:21starts with a J.
00:44:23Hey.
00:44:25Does your name start with a J?
00:44:27Yes, it does.
00:44:29So you're JJ?
00:44:31Uh-uh.
00:44:43Hello.
00:44:45Welcome to 1-900-CONFESS.
00:44:47Would you like a priest or a nun today?
00:44:49A nun.
00:44:51Please punch in your credit card number.
00:44:57Please hold.
00:44:59Oh, thank goodness.
00:45:01Oh, thank goodness.
00:45:03Oh, thank goodness.
00:45:05Oh, thank goodness.
00:45:07Oh, thank goodness.
00:45:09Oh, thank goodness.
00:45:11Oh, thank goodness.
00:45:151-900-CONFESSION.
00:45:17How may I be of service?
00:45:19It's been one day since my last confession.
00:45:21I accuse myself of the following sins.
00:45:23One day.
00:45:25Ow!
00:45:31Is that too long?
00:45:33I would have come this morning,
00:45:35but it's my 18th birthday.
00:45:37Go on.
00:45:39I didn't do it appropriately.
00:45:41Well, actually, I didn't.
00:45:43What's her problem?
00:45:45A washing machine touched her.
00:45:47Well, you know,
00:45:49I sat on a washing machine, and, well...
00:45:51All right, freak, time's up.
00:45:53What? But what do I do?
00:45:55Just unplug the thing.
00:45:57No, but I think I might have had an orgasm.
00:45:59Well, then be happy.
00:46:01You found the perfect man.
00:46:03I'm serious.
00:46:05Look, honey, you seem like a nice young lady,
00:46:07but I'll tell you this.
00:46:09Masturbation isn't a sin.
00:46:11No contritions?
00:46:13You broke no covenant with God.
00:46:15It's not in the Bible.
00:46:17So the washing machine
00:46:19could touch me anytime?
00:46:21Like morning, afternoon, night?
00:46:23Yes, and other things can touch you.
00:46:25Accidental masturbation
00:46:27is not a sin.
00:46:29Neither is intentional masturbation.
00:46:31Huh.
00:46:33God's pretty cool that way.
00:46:35He sure is. Now run along.
00:46:39Wow.
00:46:41How do you know all that?
00:46:43Because I'm a nun.
00:46:45Now eat my pussy, bitch.
00:46:47Huh. Accidental masturbation.
00:46:49Who'd have thunk?
00:46:59Revenge sex.
00:47:01What a stupid fucking idea.
00:47:03Oh, God, I'm getting out of here.
00:47:07Yeah, I admit it. I've got no game.
00:47:09I guess I just get it.
00:47:11I guess I don't feel good enough.
00:47:15Fucking douchebag.
00:47:17Damn it.
00:47:19I know I have to get laid
00:47:21if it's the last thing I do.
00:47:23You go, girl.
00:47:25What?
00:47:27What are you doing here?
00:47:29We needed someplace private.
00:47:31But hey, listen.
00:47:33If you're serious about getting laid...
00:47:35Yeah?
00:47:37If you want someone great...
00:47:39I mean, really, the best ever...
00:47:41No offense.
00:47:43Frank, the blind guy?
00:47:45Really?
00:47:47I'm telling you, he's amazing.
00:47:49I had food sex with him a few weeks ago.
00:47:51It was like nothing I've ever experienced before.
00:47:53It was like we used all our senses.
00:47:55Everything.
00:47:57If you're interested,
00:47:59I'll set it up.
00:48:01All right.
00:48:07What about him?
00:48:09Jeremy.
00:48:11Yeah, I know Jeremy.
00:48:13I think I fooled around with him once.
00:48:15I don't know his last name, though.
00:48:17It's Jones.
00:48:19Jeremy Jones.
00:48:21If this all makes sense.
00:48:23Excuse me.
00:48:25Jeremy.
00:48:27Hi.
00:48:29Who was on the phone?
00:48:31Oh, that's my new girlfriend.
00:48:33You'll meet her. She'll be here in like an hour.
00:48:35Wait, you have a girlfriend?
00:48:49Oh.
00:48:51Hi, Frank.
00:48:53Hi.
00:48:57Oh, you meant...
00:48:59You meant the dog.
00:49:01Relax.
00:49:03You need to relax and calm down.
00:49:15Oh, I'm relaxed. I'm fine.
00:49:17Why are you biting your nail?
00:49:19I'm not.
00:49:23What is it?
00:49:25Corner.
00:49:29Sit.
00:49:31Roll over.
00:49:35Oh, you mean me?
00:49:39Roll over.
00:49:43Oh, you mean me?
00:49:45Oh, how do you...
00:49:47How do you want me to...
00:49:49Just lie down.
00:49:53Just...
00:49:59Oh.
00:50:01I shouldn't even be doing this,
00:50:03but considering it a teachable moment...
00:50:05Okay.
00:50:09Oh.
00:50:11See me with your hands.
00:50:17All right.
00:50:23You know, I should really...
00:50:25I have a boyfriend, and I shouldn't be doing this.
00:50:27Really.
00:50:41Mmm, peanut butter.
00:50:53Frank, Frank.
00:50:55Oh.
00:50:59Oh, Frank.
00:51:23Yo, man.
00:51:25Dude, give me a chip.
00:51:27My chips, homeboy.
00:51:29Dude, give me a chip, man.
00:51:31My chips.
00:51:33Dude, my chips.
00:51:35My chips.
00:51:37Guys, why are you making such a mess?
00:51:39Sorry.
00:51:47It's just a case of accidental masturbation.
00:51:49That's all.
00:51:51Come on, let me do this. Go ahead.
00:51:53I got it. I got it.
00:51:55No, really, please. I want to help.
00:51:57Please.
00:51:59Okay, everybody out.
00:52:01Leave. I have to vacuum.
00:52:04Okay, everybody out.
00:52:06Leave. I have to vacuum.
00:52:20You're not even getting the chips.
00:52:22They're over here.
00:52:24I just... I see some dust over here, so...
00:52:29It's just...
00:52:31There's so much dust on this floor.
00:52:33It's just a dirty floor.
00:52:35Such a dirty...
00:52:37Dirty floor.
00:52:57Okay.
00:52:59All right.
00:53:01I think I got all that.
00:53:03I'm just gonna... I'll see you.
00:53:14Frankie.
00:53:16Oh, my... Oh.
00:53:18What?
00:53:20Oh, man, we got a smoky...
00:53:25Stop. Frank, stop teasing Frank.
00:53:28Oh, shit.
00:53:30Sorry, man. We're just looking for a place to finish this roach.
00:53:33Oh, I heard something.
00:53:35Do you want to join us?
00:53:37Come on. You got to do it. Come on.
00:53:39Seriously, guys, I need...
00:53:41What's your dog, man?
00:53:47Frank?
00:53:49Frank, are we gonna do something soon?
00:53:53Bro, you are too funny.
00:53:56Thanks, man.
00:53:58Ooh, this is some good stuff.
00:54:00I haven't smoked since junior high.
00:54:02Dude, I haven't stopped smoking since junior high.
00:54:04Wait, wait, wait.
00:54:06I feel like I was supposed to be doing something.
00:54:10Damn, I really can't remember.
00:54:12This is some good shit.
00:54:27Oh, no.
00:54:29You're the devil.
00:54:31No more.
00:54:35J.J. I... Jeremy.
00:54:37You have to remember that amazing time we had together, don't you?
00:54:40Please.
00:54:42Lex, I can't.
00:54:44I mean, I got a girlfriend.
00:54:46I really like this girl.
00:54:48Fine.
00:54:50It's just so sad because I'm wearing this...
00:54:53...cupless bra,
00:54:55and I also have on crotchless panties
00:54:58with just a little string of pearl in front
00:55:01for extra stimulation.
00:55:03Oh.
00:55:07Ah.
00:55:09We've got, like, 30 minutes before she gets here.
00:55:11Perfect.
00:55:15...before she gets here.
00:55:17Perfect.
00:55:20Come on.
00:55:28Let's do it. Let's do it.
00:55:30Fuck me. Fuck me now.
00:55:36What? What's wrong?
00:55:38I can't... I can't get it in.
00:55:40Try down there.
00:55:42It's, like, desert down there.
00:55:44It's sandpaper.
00:55:46Okay, I get the picture.
00:55:48Just try again.
00:55:50No.
00:55:52Why is this happening?
00:55:54We fooled around before.
00:55:56I was dripping wet. I came, like, four times, remember?
00:55:59Just do what you did then. Come on.
00:56:01I already did my thing. I already tried.
00:56:04What? What is different this time?
00:56:07I don't know.
00:56:09Last time...
00:56:13I honestly don't even know what you're talking about.
00:56:15What?
00:56:17You're not J.J.?
00:56:19But your name is Jeremy Jones.
00:56:21How can you not be J.J.?
00:56:23Who the hell is this J.J.?
00:56:25Where are you going?
00:56:27We're not done here.
00:56:29I can still do this. I just need a little bit of foreplay.
00:56:31I can do this.
00:56:33I don't need J.J. I don't need anyone else.
00:56:35We can do this.
00:56:37Go team.
00:56:41What?
00:56:43Just keep going.
00:56:48Shit.
00:56:58Where's Jeremy?
00:57:00Hi.
00:57:02We were just, you know...
00:57:04Hey, babe. Just working out.
00:57:10How could you, you bastard?
00:57:14You might want to...
00:57:16What?
00:57:18What?
00:57:21Ah! Mariela!
00:57:24Mariela!
00:57:26You know, those aren't mine.
00:57:28At least not all of them.
00:57:30What is wrong with you?
00:57:35What is wrong with you?
00:57:38You used to be so pure.
00:57:41Well, no more. That's it.
00:57:43Really, that's the last one.
00:58:11Cheryl?
00:58:16What is it?
00:58:18What are you doing down here?
00:58:20Waiting for everyone to leave so I can sneak out and get far, far away from here.
00:58:24What?
00:58:26Why?
00:58:28Nothing. Just this blind guy and his dog and...
00:58:30Honey, it's going to be okay.
00:58:33No, it's not okay.
00:58:35God.
00:58:37God, I...
00:58:39And you know whose fault it is?
00:58:41I'm sorry.
00:58:42It's Jake's. Jake's fault.
00:58:44That blind, cheating bastard.
00:58:46Yes. He is such a dickwad. You need to confront him.
00:58:50Yeah. Yeah, I need to confront him.
00:58:53I mean, it's my birthday, and where is he anyway?
00:58:56Like, why isn't he hanging out with me?
00:58:58You know, you just call him here and give him a big piece of your mind.
00:59:01Yeah, a big piece. A big old chunk of my mind.
00:59:04A big piece of it.
00:59:06You know, you might want to...
00:59:09You need to look hot while you break up with him.
00:59:11Yeah, you're right.
00:59:13Why am I wearing a sheet?
00:59:15I don't know.
00:59:21I'm sorry. I'm sorry.
00:59:24I get shy around beautiful women like you.
00:59:28I got no game.
00:59:36It's not important.
00:59:48Hey, um...
00:59:50Eric, I can't talk right now.
00:59:52No, no, no. I really need to talk to you.
00:59:54Really, Eric. I can't right now.
00:59:56No, no, no. I just wanted to say I'm sorry about earlier,
00:59:59and I'm just embarrassed, and I want to make it up to you.
01:00:03Eric, really? I don't care. It's fine.
01:00:05No, but I do.
01:00:07I mean, I do. I care.
01:00:10I haven't known how to tell you,
01:00:12maybe because, I don't know, I'm a little shy.
01:00:15But I was wondering, or hoping,
01:00:18that we could go out sometime.
01:00:21Soon.
01:00:22Because I'm going to be leaving for a little while,
01:00:24and it would be nice to go out...
01:00:26Really? Eric, you're shy.
01:00:28You have no game.
01:00:30No, not really.
01:00:33Yeah, no, I can't do this. Sorry.
01:00:38Okay. Alright.
01:00:40I, uh...
01:00:43Happy birthday, then.
01:00:55I'm sorry. I was trying to kiss your...
01:01:03Wow.
01:01:15Here I come, baby.
01:01:17Get ready for your big birthday surprise.
01:01:21Oh, Eric, stop.
01:01:23Um, we can't do this.
01:01:25Oh, God, Danny, not again.
01:01:27Oh, no, um...
01:01:29Honey, happy...
01:01:32What the fuck is this?
01:01:34Who the hell are you, dude?
01:01:36Okay, guys, don't.
01:01:40Cheryl. Baby.
01:01:42What is this?
01:01:44Aw, geez, Cheryl.
01:01:46You're...
01:01:48I've been looking for you all night, and you've been...
01:01:50Oh, man, no wonder I couldn't find you.
01:01:52You couldn't find me?
01:01:54What about all those girls' vaginas you were in,
01:01:57or your penis getting sucked?
01:01:59Cheryl, honey.
01:02:01You can work this out.
01:02:03Baby, I love you.
01:02:04Jake, no, you have to go.
01:02:05Baby, I'll be faithful from now on, please.
01:02:07I promise.
01:02:08No, Jake, I can't do this. I'm sorry.
01:02:11Cheryl, come on.
01:02:12No, Jake, please, just go.
01:02:14I'm sorry.
01:02:15You're a heartless bitch!
01:02:17How could you do...
01:02:19Yay! You did it.
01:02:21I'm so proud of you. You got your revenge sex.
01:02:23You've left him a mere shell of a man.
01:02:25Revenge sex?
01:02:28It's really not what it sounds like at all.
01:02:31Right.
01:02:33All makes sense now.
01:02:35Wow, I feel really stupid.
01:02:38Eric, I'm really... I'm really sorry.
01:02:41Cheryl, I really liked you.
01:02:44And you used me.
01:02:46Eric, please don't go. Please, Eric!
01:02:50Aren't you happy?
01:02:53Well, no, that's not exactly how it's supposed to feel like.
01:02:56You mean the sex? Was it...
01:02:59No, we didn't quite do it.
01:03:01Oh, you know, I couldn't seem to do it either.
01:03:03Really?
01:03:04I just never found the right guy.
01:03:06Or guys.
01:03:08Anyway, we'd better get downstairs. People are starting to leave.
01:03:11I wonder how Sue did.
01:03:14I can't believe she dumped me, man.
01:03:16This is bullshit!
01:03:18God!
01:03:20Oh! Oh!
01:03:22Suck it!
01:03:24God, I'm out of here!
01:03:26Yeah!
01:03:28He has good hair, though.
01:03:32Don't you puke on me.
01:03:34Don't you puke on me.
01:03:36Don't you puke on me.
01:03:38Don't you puke on me.
01:03:40Don't you puke on me.
01:03:42Don't puke on my car, either.
01:03:56Oh, Sue, are you all right?
01:03:59Was it from sex? Did you pop your cork?
01:04:02I don't think so. Not with a guy, anyway.
01:04:05Oh, don't ask.
01:04:07Every possible object.
01:04:09It's like every mechanical thing.
01:04:11It's like Transformers.
01:04:13They just all became vibrators.
01:04:15I told you.
01:04:17It's addicting.
01:04:19So what about Chris?
01:04:21Well, last time I saw him, he was running away for dear life.
01:04:23I told you he was gay.
01:04:25Well, I think I'm just all cramp.
01:04:31I think it's broken.
01:04:33So, wait.
01:04:35None of us cashed an RV card.
01:04:38Oh, Joanna, you're so sweet.
01:04:41So I was going to go grab some food.
01:04:43Can I go?
01:04:45No, thank you.
01:04:47I think I should finish up here.
01:04:49Did you ever find that guy you were looking for?
01:04:51No.
01:04:53I don't know. For some reason, I just realized
01:04:55he needs to be my first.
01:04:57Or something.
01:04:59Why? Do you know him?
01:05:01Sort of.
01:05:03Oh. Well, hey, if you happen to run into him,
01:05:05tell him I'd like to see him again.
01:05:13Love him.
01:05:15Shut it.
01:05:17I don't want to hear it from you.
01:05:19I don't want to get married.
01:05:21Zip it.
01:05:35Um...
01:05:45Um, no.
01:05:47No way.
01:05:49Ugh.
01:06:01Oh, well.
01:06:03There's always next year.
01:06:19It's you.
01:06:21I've been waiting for you.
01:06:23JJ.
01:06:27Joanna.
01:06:49Hey.
01:07:19Wow.
01:07:35That's amazing.
01:07:37Yeah, I didn't know
01:07:39I had it in me.
01:07:41I guess something inspired me.
01:07:43You really captured
01:07:45his expression and his eyes.
01:07:47Yeah.
01:07:49Even that little cowlick he has in his hair.
01:07:51Whose?
01:07:53Eric's.
01:07:55It's him, right?
01:07:57Oh.
01:07:59Yeah.
01:08:01I have to go see him.
01:08:07Well, I think you know what we should do.
01:08:171-900-CONFESS.
01:08:19Sister Therese?
01:08:21Yeah, hun?
01:08:23Um, there was a problem with your credit card.
01:08:25I just need the last three numbers in the back.
01:08:27Oh, sure.
01:08:29It's 271.
01:08:31Um, sister,
01:08:33I know this isn't a confession, but
01:08:35can I ask your opinion on something?
01:08:37Do you think if you do something bad
01:08:39that God will forgive you?
01:08:41Like, take you back?
01:08:43Sure, hun.
01:08:45Sure, hun.
01:08:47Why not?
01:08:49As long as you're on the right path.
01:08:51Well, how do you know if you're on that path?
01:08:53I always look for some kind of sign
01:08:55from the universe.
01:08:57Something to let me know that it's
01:08:59all gonna be okay.
01:09:01Sister?
01:09:03Can I get up now?
01:09:05I really gotta pee.
01:09:07No! Hustler trap!
01:09:09Okay, honey.
01:09:11I really need to get back to work, but call back anytime.
01:09:13I will.
01:09:15Thanks.
01:09:19Sister?
01:09:21Shut up, or I'll punish you hard, you she-fucker!
01:09:39Eric, wait.
01:09:41Cheryl?
01:09:45Eric, um,
01:09:47look, I am so sorry about
01:09:49everything.
01:09:51I was trying to have revenge sex with you
01:09:53at the beginning, but then at the end I wasn't.
01:09:55I just didn't want to
01:09:57do that with you.
01:09:59The revenge part, not the sex part.
01:10:01Um,
01:10:03I...
01:10:05I do want to go out with you.
01:10:07And I didn't realize that until this morning.
01:10:09I mean,
01:10:11you're a completely different guy than Jake is,
01:10:13and he's all over these...
01:10:15Come on, we gotta get going.
01:10:17Oh.
01:10:19Wow.
01:10:21Um, Cheryl, this is my sister Tina.
01:10:23Tina, Cheryl.
01:10:25Hi, nice to meet you.
01:10:29Uh,
01:10:31so, um,
01:10:33do you mind if I call you in a few days?
01:10:35When I get back?
01:10:37Sure.
01:10:43Oh.
01:10:45Sorry, no kissing, right?
01:10:47No kissing.
01:10:49Oh.
01:11:03Hey, did you ever, uh,
01:11:05do you remember the flowers I sent you?
01:11:09I don't even care that you hooked up with Lexi.
01:11:11Wait, what? I never did that.
01:11:15I mean, you don't have to lie about it.
01:11:17She told me all about your pierced tongue.
01:11:23She must have me mixed up with someone else.
01:11:25I wonder who it was.
01:11:35At least this birthday's over.
01:11:49Dear Lord,
01:11:51please forgive me.
01:11:53I mean, if you could just,
01:11:55I don't know, like, send me a message
01:11:57or something.
01:11:59I don't know.
01:12:01I don't know.
01:12:03At least, I don't know,
01:12:05like, send me a sign.
01:12:33Excuse me.
01:12:35Excuse me.
01:12:37Do you know where the church is?
01:12:39It's on Fountain Street.
01:12:41Um, yeah, that's the church I go to.
01:12:43Or used to go to.
01:12:45Um, it's straight up that way
01:12:47and then left.
01:12:51But you're more than welcome to come with me
01:12:53if you like.
01:12:55Oh, um, I don't know.
01:13:03Well, that's pretty powerful.
01:13:05Oh.
01:13:07250 horsepower, 225 pounds of torque.
01:13:09Like I said,
01:13:11you're more than welcome to hop on.
01:13:15I don't think so.
01:13:17But thanks.
01:13:19What's your name?
01:13:21Sue. What's yours?
01:13:23Jesus.
01:13:25Really?
01:13:27Si.
01:13:29Maybe I could use a ride.
01:13:33Okay.
01:13:43Ah!
01:14:03Ah!
01:14:33Ah!