Being locked up with your partner isn't as rosy as it would seem. Here are some tips on how to survive the lockdown with your partner.
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00:00If you're quarantined with your partner, it's normal that a whole bunch of emotions are
00:14going to come up.
00:15And so you want to help each other deal with that emotional rollercoaster.
00:18One thing you can do is just validate your partner's feelings.
00:20So rather than say, Oh, don't worry about it.
00:22It's not a big deal.
00:23When your partner's anxious, listen and then say, yeah, I completely understand where you're
00:27coming from.
00:28You can influence how they feel by just listening, validating how they're feeling and talking
00:32about how you're feeling as well.
00:33If you feel like your partner's starting to panic and you think, okay, I'm really anxious
00:37right now too.
00:38I can't take on your panic.
00:39You might have to set some boundaries and say, I understand that you're feeling really
00:43upset right now.
00:44I know that you're really anxious, but it's going to raise my anxiety level if I sit and
00:48listen to this.
00:49So for right now, I'm going to go in the other room.
00:56If you and your partner are stuck together in a small room for a long period of time,
01:00it's going to be easy to start getting irritated with each other, to start being mean, maybe
01:04you're unkind and set you up for a downward spiral where you're going to argue, you're
01:09going to bicker, get on each other's nerves.
01:11What you really want to do is just focus on how do you be kind and respectful.
01:15And there may be times where you think my partner's rude to me, so I'm going to be rude
01:17back.
01:18You don't want to do that.
01:19Instead, focus on what can you do?
01:21Can I, how can I be kinder?
01:23How can I be more respectful?
01:24How can I focus on what my partner needs?
01:27Figure out how are you going to cope with this stress and to develop new coping strategies.
01:35Maybe you decide you're going to work out with an app so you can still work out in your
01:39home or you're going to video chat with friends, or maybe you're going to pick up yoga or you're
01:43going to try meditation because you can use an app for that.
01:46You just really want to focus on what are my healthy coping strategies and then make
01:50sure you don't pick up unhealthy ones, eating too much, turning to alcohol and doing things
01:54that would just make you feel better in the minute, but also cause bigger long-term problems
01:58aren't going to do you any favors right now.
02:03You can definitely use it as an opportunity to grow closer, but you have to be proactive
02:09about that.
02:10So we think, what can we do together?
02:12You can watch some of your favorite shows.
02:13You can watch a movie together.
02:15You can say, let's cook dinner together.
02:17And if you can focus on that and make it an opportunity to get to know each other better,
02:21to go through this difficult experience together rather than fighting against each other, you
02:26can bond.
02:27You can feel like your relationship is stronger.
02:35But one thing that you can do to keep things in perspective is to just sort of zoom forward.
02:3820 years from now, what would we tell our grandkids about this?
02:42Or someday when we're talking about this story, how would we want it to be?
02:45And so if you can just zoom out a little bit and focus on the bigger picture, it will help
02:48you keep things in perspective.
02:51And even though that this is a stressful time in your life, it won't last forever.