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  • 2 days ago
First broadcast 2nd January 2019.

Sue Perkins

Josh Widdicombe
Richard Osman
Kate Williams
Tom Allen
Griff Rhys Jones
Angela Scanlon

Category

📺
TV
Transcript
00:00Hello you and welcome to Insert Name Here, the show
00:28where we discover surprising facts about people with just one thing in common, they've
00:32all got the same name. Joining me, six of my favourite people with fabulous names and
00:36even more fabulous faces, please welcome Kate Williams, Tom Allen and their team captain
00:41Josh Widdicombe and on the other side, Angela Scanlon, Griff Rhys-Jones and their captain
00:45Richard Osmond.
00:46APPLAUSE
00:53Now, do you have a nickname, Tom? Tom is very short, you do people...
00:59Nobody shortens it to Ter, no.
01:01I do have a nickname with a friend, we both call each other Sue, actually.
01:05Yes, because her mum is called Sue and we like the idea of being like her mum because
01:12she's a teacher, she's very organised, she goes on a lot of cruises.
01:15Have you ever been on a cruise?
01:16No.
01:17I went on a gay cruise.
01:18Did you?
01:19On a boat.
01:22It was wonderful, it was like 1,500 gay men on a cruise ship pootling around the Mediterranean
01:28and people decorated all their cabin doorways with things and one group put
01:32Liberté, Egalité, Beyoncé.
01:36Lovely.
01:37That's all we need.
01:38What a republic.
01:39That's all we need.
01:41We're going to move now to the all-important question.
01:43Which name is going to be featuring on tonight's show?
01:46Well, they can be big, little or slow and it's what five guys are named
01:50because tonight's show is Mo.
01:53And we're going to be talking all kinds of Mo, including Morris, Mohamed, Monica
02:00and maybe I might drop in the occasional Mo in.
02:03I'm just going to tease you with that.
02:05Along the way, our teams are going to collect as many Mo's as they can.
02:09At the end of the show, the winning team has the honour of deciding
02:11who's officially the greatest Mo of all time.
02:14So we've got a movie Mo, a marathon Mo, a miraculous Mo and a muscular Mo.
02:21Richard, you're up first, so choose a category if you will.
02:23Can we have a movie Mo, please?
02:25You've picked movie Mo and you have picked acting legend
02:29Morris Micklewhite, better known as Sir Michael Caine.
02:33Oh, let's have a look at that great man's stats.
02:37Most famous catchphrase?
02:39You are only supposed to blow the bloody doors off.
02:42Second most famous catchphrase?
02:44Not a lot of people know that.
02:46Third most famous catchphrase?
02:48My name is Michael Caine.
02:50Least famous catchphrase?
02:52My name is Morris Joseph Micklewhite, Jr.
02:56Let's go to the chase.
02:58Come on, everyone, give us your best Michael Caines.
03:00Who's got one? Who's got a Michael?
03:01Well, you haven't.
03:02No, I know you haven't.
03:03Can I just say I would really like to hear Tom Allen's Michael Caine?
03:06How is it, it's sort of my name?
03:08My name. It's all for the no.
03:10Well, yes, but it's sinus injection.
03:12It takes food to the no.
03:13Is it particularly?
03:14No, that's not Michael Caine.
03:16He's just got a very leisurely delivery.
03:19But you know why that is?
03:20Why?
03:21No.
03:22OK, so apparently he said he was in a movie that he only had two lines on
03:26and he decided that if he spoke really slowly that he would then be in the movie for longer.
03:32I can't be true.
03:34It's true, it's true.
03:35Also, what I know about Michael Caine, I saw him interviewed on The Late Late Show in Ireland
03:39and so he said he taught himself not to blink.
03:43Oh, yeah.
03:44Because he observed that everybody loves babies but they don't blink for a long time.
03:50So he taught himself not to blink so that people would find him endearing.
03:54It's also the reason why you like people who shit themselves all the time.
03:57LAUGHTER
03:59I've got a theory.
04:00Michael Caine has got to the top of acting and he wants no-one else to get there
04:04so he's giving shit advice so that no-one catches up.
04:08Don't blink!
04:09Everyone's going around, eyes wide open, talking too slowly
04:13and he's going, I'm still at the top here!
04:16He's appeared, Michael Caine, in over 115 films
04:20and he is one of only two actors nominated for an Academy Award for acting
04:25in every decade from the 1960s to the 2000s.
04:29That's because since 2000, no other actor has blinked.
04:31No.
04:33Despite landing his big break in a role in Zulu,
04:35why did the film's studio cancel Michael Caine's contract?
04:39Was it something about, like, they couldn't understand him or something?
04:41It was something to do with the way he looked.
04:43Way he looked? Too tall.
04:45Way more depressing than that.
04:46Glasses. Too cockney.
04:47Who cockney?
04:48They said he looked gay.
04:50Oh!
04:51They were worried, of course, that having someone gay in the film
04:54would undermine its latent racism.
04:56LAUGHTER
04:59Isn't that terrible?
05:00Here's Michael in the film, before the concept of camouflage.
05:04I mean, that is quite a gay outfit.
05:06That's the sort of thing I'd wear.
05:08One of Michael Caine's less celebrated roles came in the 1981 horror movie
05:13The Hand.
05:15Michael's character loses his right hand in a car crash
05:18and it takes on a life of its own, embarking on a series of murders.
05:23The horror is unconvincing.
05:25The sex scene, however, eye-watering.
05:28LAUGHTER
05:30We'll forget that in a hurry.
05:31Why did Michael take on the role?
05:33Oh, he's one of those people that will say, like,
05:35he does shit films to pay for things.
05:37Yes.
05:38I wanted to get a swimming pool so he did The Hand or something like that.
05:41That's the kind of thing he says, isn't it?
05:42Do you know what, Josh?
05:43I'm going to give you that.
05:44He wanted to build a new garage.
05:46This is according to the biography of the film's director,
05:48who was Oliver Stone.
05:49Oliver Stone directed that.
05:51This is a magnificent film and I'm very keen to show you a clip.
05:54Here it is.
05:57Get back!
05:58Get back!
05:59Get back!
06:00Go down!
06:01Go down!
06:02Go down!
06:03Go down!
06:04Go down!
06:05Oh!
06:06Go down!
06:07Come down!
06:08Go down!
06:28đó Deshalb!
06:29So good, look!
06:31So good!
06:33He blinked in that, he blinked!
06:35He blinks quite a lot!
06:37You could have given us a trigger warning before that,
06:39that was unbelievable!
06:40That was great acting, wasn't it?
06:42I'd love to be able to act like that.
06:44I imagine it was quite a complicated shoot for him,
06:46because first of all, he had to do all the acting,
06:49and then he had to come in and they'd say,
06:51can we have you in again, Michael, because we're just going to do the hand.
06:54There's no way he played that.
06:56He's a method actor, he had his hand chopped off at the start.
06:58What does Michael Caine have in common with John Cleese and Mark Boland?
07:04Does anybody know?
07:05Oh, I've never met any of them.
07:07Did they all host Friday on the One Show?
07:11I'll put you out of your misery.
07:14They all bought Rolls Royces before they could drive.
07:17Wow!
07:18So they had their money, but they didn't have the certificate.
07:21Let's have a look.
07:22He didn't pass his driving test until the age of 50.
07:25Wow!
07:26Yeah, the first time he failed when he stuck his right hand out.
07:30LAUGHTER
07:32When Michael Caine took his test, he said,
07:34I got in the car and the guy looked at me and went,
07:36I loved you in The Man Who Would Be King,
07:38you're going to have to be shit not to pass this test.
07:40LAUGHTER
07:42Right, it's time to get competitive because we are playing for the Mo.
07:46The question is this.
07:47During the 60s, Michael had a number of famous flatmates,
07:51including actor Terence Stamp, hairdresser Vidal Sassoon
07:54and composer John Barry.
07:56So the question is, while living with John Barry...
07:58Can I just stop you? Yes.
07:59I've just found out that Vidal Sassoon is a person.
08:02LAUGHTER
08:03APPLAUSE
08:05We saw...
08:06We saw him need to do a sort of supplementary red button show.
08:12Do you have to do that?
08:14Explanatory bar.
08:15I also only just found out that Max Factor is a person.
08:17It is.
08:18Max Factor is a real person.
08:19Yes.
08:20He is.
08:21LAUGHTER
08:22While living with John Barry, Michael became the first person
08:25to do what?
08:26Was he the first person ever to write,
08:28this is my fucking yoghurt, Barry, in the fridge?
08:31LAUGHTER
08:33The first person to hear a particular song?
08:35Yes.
08:36Oh.
08:37Born Free?
08:38No.
08:39Was it Five Colours in Her Hair by McFly?
08:41Goldfinger.
08:42Goldfinger is right, well done!
08:44APPLAUSE
08:46So, did Michael Caine influence him on the composing of it?
08:52He didn't influence him, but he was the first person to hear it.
08:54He was basically kept up all night by the sound of John Barry.
08:58But well done.
08:59You have scored a mo for your team.
09:00Well done.
09:01Yay!
09:06Right.
09:07Josh, it's your turn.
09:08Pick a mo.
09:09You've got a marathon mo, a miraculous mo,
09:11and a muscular mo to choose from.
09:13Can we have a miraculous mo?
09:15Miraculous mo.
09:16Miraculous mo.
09:17OK.
09:18That means you've got Old Testament prophet, writer and lawgiver,
09:22Mo Zez.
09:24Can I have marathon mo?
09:26No!
09:27Um, let's look at his stats.
09:30Career high.
09:32Leading the Jewish people out of Egypt.
09:35How it's gone for them since then?
09:37Patchy.
09:38Career low.
09:40Spending 40 years in the wilderness.
09:43People who know how that feels...
09:45The Lib Dems.
09:46LAUGHTER
09:48Yes, it's Holy Moses, the man who parted the Red Sea,
09:50delivered the Ten Commandments and saw God in a burning bush.
09:53The story of Moses is found in the book of Exodus,
09:56although Moses was traditionally given credit for writing
09:58the first five books of the Bible.
10:00What's the most famous flaw in this particular argument,
10:03i.e. that he wrote more?
10:04Was it the Sinai Desert?
10:06LAUGHTER
10:07The floral argument rather than the physical geological floral.
10:10Sorry.
10:11Is it cos it was...
10:12Dan Brown wrote the first five?
10:14LAUGHTER
10:15Kate, you know, tell us, put us out of our misery.
10:17Well, not only was the Bible compiled much later than we think
10:20Moses lived, but the main reason is because Deuteronomy
10:24includes Moses' death.
10:26So the very book he was supposed to have wrote includes his death.
10:28His death.
10:29One argument was that he'd been dictated it all by God
10:32and he'd also been told about his death and he wrote it down
10:34while crying.
10:35That was one justification.
10:37That's how I wrote my autobiography.
10:38Yes.
10:39LAUGHTER
10:40According to Deuteronomy, chapter 34, if you're interested,
10:42God took Moses to the top of Mount Nebo,
10:44showed him the entirety of the Promised Land whereupon Moses died.
10:47It was hardly surprising because they'd just made a 120-year-old
10:50man walk up a mountain.
10:52LAUGHTER
10:53OK, what was unusual about a version of the Ten Commandments
10:56printed in 1631?
10:58Oh, there was 12 of them.
10:59LAUGHTER
11:00No, it wasn't a number.
11:01Well, they were just, like, totally wrong.
11:03So it was like, no running, no bombing, no heavy patterns.
11:06LAUGHTER
11:07Well, one was wrong.
11:09Yeah, one of them was...
11:10Thou shalt commit adultery?
11:11Yes!
11:12Oh, God!
11:13That's absolutely right!
11:14APPLAUSE
11:15That's what became Strictly Come Dancing.
11:19Yes, so you're absolutely right, Griff.
11:20They left a version encouraging,
11:21Thou shalt commit adultery.
11:22And 1,000 copies of the so-called Wicked Bible were burned.
11:23But in 2015, one of the few remaining copies was sold for 31,250 quid.
11:38The buyer, a certain B. Johnson of London.
11:42LAUGHTER
11:43APPLAUSE
11:47A number of movie stars have depicted Moses over the years.
11:49Sir Ben Kingsley played Moses in a 1995 TV movie.
11:53Oh, my goodness!
11:54He looks like Joel the Explorer!
11:56LAUGHTER
11:57It's like he's wearing a pubic bonnet.
12:01LAUGHTER
12:02He's a little bit confused.
12:03He looks like sort of your mum's friend.
12:05LAUGHTER
12:07Right, time to get competitive as we play for The Mo.
12:11We have seen a number of portrayals of Moses over the years.
12:14Have you played Moses in a BBC One series in 1997?
12:18Nicholas Lindhurst.
12:20LAUGHTER
12:21Was it the, um, Olympic triple jumper Jonathan Edwards?
12:25LAUGHTER
12:26Have you first got no cigar?
12:27You're not going to get this, I don't think...
12:28What's their initials?
12:30JC.
12:31Jesus Christ!
12:32LAUGHTER
12:34OK, it is...
12:36It is Jim Carter.
12:37It's Jim Carter.
12:38CHEERING
12:40Better known...
12:41From Downton Abbey.
12:42From Downton Abbey.
12:43I tell you, this is incredible.
12:44It's very hard.
12:45None of you could have possibly ever got this.
12:47Let's have a look.
12:48He just got it!
12:49Jack!
12:51Jack!
12:52Thou shalt not steal.
12:53Jack!
12:54Thou shalt honour thy mother and thy father.
12:57Jack!
12:58Thou shalt not commit adultery.
13:00Yes!
13:01Thou shalt not covet thy neighbour's ox or his ass.
13:06Jack!
13:07Jack!
13:08I had thou shalt not wank!
13:10I had thou shalt not wank!
13:11LAUGHTER
13:12LAUGHTER
13:13LAUGHTER
13:14APPLAUSE
13:19Oh!
13:20Oh, this is embarrassing.
13:22As soon as I saw it, I've seen this before.
13:24LAUGHTER
13:25Well, your encyclopedic knowledge of your own career...
13:29It was also long ago!
13:30Josh wins them!
13:31APPLAUSE
13:32Richard, it's your turn, my lovely.
13:33You've got to pick a Moe.
13:34You've got the choice of a Marathon Moe or a Muscular Moe.
13:35We'll go Muscular Moe, please Sue.
13:36A very good choice.
13:37You pick Muscular Moe and he is the greatest.
13:38It's a boxing world champion, Muhammad Ali!
13:39Oh-oh!
13:40Ah-oh!
13:41Lovely.
13:42And you've got to pick a Moe.
13:43You've got the choice of a Marathon Moe or a Muscular Moe.
13:45We'll go Muscular Moe, please Sue.
13:46A very good choice.
13:47You pick Muscular Moe and he is the greatest.
13:50It's a boxing world champion, Muhammad Ali!
13:52Oh!
13:53ALL THE END
13:54APPLAUSE
13:56So, let's pick up the stats.
14:00Float like?
14:02Butterfly.
14:03Sting like?
14:04Bee.
14:05Most famous fights?
14:06Rumble in the Jungle.
14:07Thriller in Manila.
14:08Least famous fight, bad altercation in the petrol station.
14:12Kate, have you got a favourite boxer?
14:14You know, we always think of boxing as only recently become a female sport.
14:18But when it was... So, obviously, it was an Olympic sport,
14:20but then fell out with the end of Rome.
14:22And in the 18th century, it came back,
14:24and women were seen as some of the biggest boxers in London,
14:28female pugilists.
14:29And so I've got a really famous one called Mary Ann Pierce,
14:32who was called the Boxing Baroness.
14:34You know, when you...
14:35Because I like to watch that WWE wrestling sometimes with those women,
14:38when they were all in those glittery outfits.
14:40Not going to lie, that has taken me by surprise.
14:45And I watched one where one of them was so beaten,
14:48they called the hospital stretcher on, and they put the neck thing on,
14:52and then when they said the other one had won,
14:53she jumped off the stretcher, threw off the neck brace,
14:56and started to bend back into the ring again.
14:58Oh, someone's going to have to tell Kate some bad news about this.
15:01LAUGHTER
15:05All right, let's move on.
15:07Born Cassius Clay, Muhammad Ali was a three-time heavyweight champion,
15:10and won 56 of his 61 professional fights, 37 of them by knockout.
15:15What inspired him to take up boxing?
15:17Oh, was it, um, female pugilists in the...
15:20LAUGHTER
15:22He was bullied, wasn't he, by younger kids, or...?
15:27In this specific incident, actually, somebody stole his bike.
15:29That was the inciting reason. At the age of 12,
15:32his brand-new red-and-white Schwinn bicycle was stolen
15:34from outside the local army club.
15:36He reported the theft, he told the police officer he was going to
15:39whoop the person responsible, and the police officer said to him,
15:42well, you'd better learn to box first, which is great advice by a policeman.
15:45Nowadays, they just give you a crime number and say, hmm.
15:47LAUGHTER
15:48My dad taught me how to box, um, because I was being picked on at school,
15:54and he was like, you just have to punch my hand, that's all you have to do,
15:56just punch my hand, and I was sort of cowering in the corner going,
15:59no, I can't do it, Dad, I can't deal with confrontation.
16:01It doesn't sound right in my accent.
16:02LAUGHTER
16:04And my dad responded by saying, oh, I thought you'd be much better at this,
16:07I mean, you've already got the silk dressing gown on and everything.
16:09LAUGHTER
16:10He was a conscientious objector, and in 1966, he refused to join the Vietnam War.
16:20As a result, he was stripped of his titles and banned from boxing.
16:24To sidestep the ban, where did promoters consider staging a fight?
16:28The moon.
16:29LAUGHTER
16:30You're...
16:31Am I close?
16:33Well, in the sense that it was above ground.
16:35Yeah. On a boat.
16:36On a boat. On an aeroplane.
16:37On an aeroplane.
16:38Absolutely, on a Boeing 747 on board and mid-air.
16:43Wow.
16:43And if you want to see what a boxing match on a plane looks like,
16:45well, just get on a Ryanair flight to Magdalene.
16:49I don't know, is it historically a weirder sporting event?
16:53In the 18th century was a big...
16:54People were...
16:55The aristocracy went wild for fox-tossing.
16:59LAUGHTER
17:00Tom, have you got anything on this?
17:02Funnily enough, that's what I did for my birthday.
17:07LAUGHTER
17:09Yes, so you ideally have a castle, so you get your castle courtyard.
17:13I'm out, I can't play.
17:14I'm still in.
17:16A war card.
17:17LAUGHTER
17:19So what we do is then we sort of get us a little hammock and Josh holds one end
17:23and I hold the other.
17:24Yeah.
17:24And we've got the fox and then toss it before it realises what's going on.
17:28When you say toss it, is it the furthest or is it up and going like a pancake?
17:31Highest, the highest.
17:31Oh, it's not what I thought it was at all.
17:33LAUGHTER
17:36Did you realise in series two of this that you could get away with saying any old
17:41bullshit and be buying it?
17:42LAUGHTER
17:44There are pictures online of people having a gay afternoon fox tossing.
17:46I'm not googling fox tossing!
17:47LAUGHTER
17:49That's one thing your search engine does not need.
17:52LAUGHTER
17:53In 71, Ali embarked on a UK tour.
17:56What did he do in a Norwich supermarket?
17:59Ooh.
17:59Ooh.
18:00Was there an unexpected item in the bagging area?
18:02LAUGHTER
18:03Did he put nectarines in the bag but then press the lemons because they're cheaper, by the way?
18:08Oh, that's a good idea.
18:09I think that says a lot more about you than Muhammad Ali.
18:12LAUGHTER
18:14He signed tins of Ovaltine.
18:17Oh.
18:17He was on a promotional tour for Ovaltine and after an hour talking to the people of Norwich,
18:22he attempted the world's first Ovaltine overdose.
18:24Really?
18:26So there he is, yeah, that was part of his...
18:27Floats like a butterfly, sleeps like a baby.
18:29LAUGHTER
18:31In January 1961, how did Ali save a man's life?
18:36Oh, did you do that thing where you almost push them in the road and go,
18:38Oh, saved your life.
18:41Didn't he talk someone down from a bridge, like a suicide down from a bridge?
18:44It wasn't a bridge.
18:45It was the ninth floor of an apartment block, but well done, yeah.
18:49And he talked a suicidal man down, so the man had climbed onto the fire escape.
18:53He spoke to the guy for over 20 minutes, promised to help him find a job,
18:57before putting his arm around his shoulders and leading him to safety.
19:00He then drove the man to a nearby police station in the back of his Rolls Royce.
19:03Isn't that incredible?
19:04Did you look at his Rolls Royce before he learned to drive?
19:06LAUGHTER
19:08Even better than that, in November 1990, how did Ali save the lives of 15 people?
19:13Oh!
19:14Or was it a rugby train trying to commit suicide?
19:16LAUGHTER
19:18Think of what was going on, can you...
19:19What was the year?
19:21November 1990.
19:221990, the LA riots?
19:24No, think Middle East.
19:25Gulf War.
19:27Did he negotiate the hostages' release?
19:29He did.
19:30Oh!
19:31He did not, he did.
19:32Woo!
19:33He did.
19:34And if you're clapping, you know I didn't do it.
19:37It was Muhammad Ali who did it, I didn't do it.
19:39I mean, you could not love this guy more.
19:41It's an extraordinary story.
19:43He went to Iraq and he successfully negotiated with Saddam Hussein for the release of 15 American
19:49hostages. In exchange, Saddam got a signed tin of Ovaltine.
19:52LAUGHTER
19:54OK, time to get competitive, we're going to play four.
19:56The Mo.
19:57I feel like you've got to get this.
19:59In 1976, Ali took on possibly one of his toughest opponents.
20:02It wasn't a boxer.
20:04Who was it?
20:05Kangaroo.
20:07No.
20:08Is it an animal?
20:09No, it wasn't.
20:10I'll give you a clue, it was a fictional character.
20:12Aimed at kids.
20:13Aimed at children.
20:14Oh, Peppa Pig.
20:15LAUGHTER
20:16Was it Muhammad Ali versus the Tooth Fairy?
20:19I'm going to give you that.
20:22I'm going to give you that because actually what it was is Mr Tooth Decay was the enemy.
20:27So, yeah, teeth related, yeah.
20:30It was an educational concept album.
20:32The Adventures of Ali and His Gang versus Mr Tooth Decay.
20:37Yeah.
20:37It begins with Ali in training for a fight versus Mr Tooth Decay.
20:41He's accompanied by his sidekicks, Sugarcuber and Willy Plaque.
20:46You do not want to get Willy Plaque.
20:49You've got to floss.
20:50All right.
20:53Well done, Richard.
20:55You win for Moe.
21:02Time to fire up our Moe flavoured fruit machine.
21:04Each spin is going to reveal three faces and our team must match the extraordinary facts,
21:08the extraordinary Moe.
21:09Also a chance to unearth more candidates for the greatest Moe of all time.
21:13So, let's spin.
21:15So, we've got much-missed politician Moe Molum,
21:18much-admired newsreader Moira Stewart and way-less-clothed Mahatma Gandhi.
21:24Which Moe used to write a sex column for a men's magazine?
21:30Josh.
21:31Ghandi, next.
21:35And soon we are also going to go with Ghandi.
21:39Um, OK.
21:40Right.
21:41This game plays tricks on the mind, but it can't be Ghandi.
21:45Would you say Ghandi is the kind of person...
21:47To write a sex column.
21:49To write a sex column.
21:50Not a sentence I ever thought I'd say before I die.
21:54I mean, it's a tough one, but I think, no.
21:57Do we know what magazine it was?
21:58It's just a men's magazine.
22:00I feel like men will definitely give it away.
22:02Yeah.
22:02It was India Weekly.
22:04Yeah.
22:05Do you think the obvious one would be Moira, because she's a journalist?
22:08Well, Mo Mollum...
22:10She'll be going with Mo because she's more unexpected.
22:12In the late 90s, particularly around the time of the kind of lads mags,
22:16where Mo Mollum was a real big character and she was a lot of fun.
22:22So that would be the argument for Mo Mollum.
22:24You know a lot about this period in history and the early dawnings of men's magazines, Josh.
22:29I was in my teenage years at that time.
22:31Were you a nuts man or a loaded man?
22:33Well, nuts was actually later.
22:35Nuts was about 2005.
22:39Did you write letters into them, though?
22:41Yes, I wrote in and I said, Dear Mahatma.
22:46So who are you going to pick out of those three?
22:48I'm not going to go with Gandhi, because if we go with Gandhi and we're wrong,
22:53we're going to look like complete idiots.
22:56So...
22:56That ship's already sailed, Josh.
23:00That ship's sailed at Vidal Sassoon.
23:03Go on, Josh, it's your thing.
23:04Mo Mollum.
23:06So they've gone for Mo Mollum, who do you reckon?
23:07What do you think?
23:08I think...
23:09I mean, they're very left field.
23:10There's very little that connects the three of them.
23:13They've all been played by Sir Ben Kingsley.
23:15Yes!
23:17The truth is that it's Mahatma Gandhi did it!
23:21And I believe that he did.
23:22He had quite an interest in sex.
23:24And I think he probably wrote in a gentleman's Indian magazine.
23:29Listen, if we say Gandhi and it's right, I mean, imagine how stupid Josh is going to look then!
23:34I mean, it would be mind-blowing.
23:38We would go with Gandhi, please.
23:40You're mad.
23:41You're genuinely wrong.
23:43This is about to be the most enjoyable moment of my life.
23:49Or is it?
23:50The right answer is...
23:51It's Mo Mollum!
23:53Yes!
23:54APPLAUSE
23:56She volunteered to write a sex advice column for Zoom magazine.
24:04She sent a copy of her CV in, listing all her previous positions,
24:08including Northern Ireland secretary and her role negotiating the Good Friday Agreement.
24:13When you say all her previous positions...
24:14LAUGHTER
24:16One of her first letters, here it is, sent by Lee from Hull.
24:20Should I have a threesome?
24:21LAUGHTER
24:22What do you think Mo's advice was?
24:24Oh, gosh.
24:25Did she say,
24:26During the Good Friday Agreement, me, Gerry Adams and Tony Blair...
24:30LAUGHTER
24:32Works for us.
24:32LAUGHTER
24:35That was a really Good Friday, she said.
24:37LAUGHTER
24:41This is what she said to Lee from Hull.
24:44You've been taking a risk suggesting it to your girlfriend.
24:47If she's a bit straight, it's unlikely she'll agree and may be very offended.
24:50Oh!
24:51Oh, cautious, cautious advice.
24:53I once had some friends who had a six-some, and then they said to me they had a six-some,
24:57and then they said, then we stopped for some sandwiches.
24:59And I said, what flavour sandwiches?
25:02And they said, and my friend said, how can you ask that question,
25:05when I've told you this about my six-some and you ask about the flavour sandwiches?
25:08But I was just interested, you know,
25:10well, you have a six-some and then you suddenly say, I'm for cheese or ham or...
25:14I mean, thank you.
25:15I think you'd get one of those, you know, those platters you get from Pratt.
25:18Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, you're absolutely right.
25:20It might be a time to invest in one.
25:21I mean, now seems a very good time to ask the question I've been building to all series.
25:26When you're having a sextet slash six-some,
25:28what sandwiches would you have served?
25:30Oh!
25:30Can I start with you, Griff?
25:31I mean, just a very brief answer, please.
25:33What sandwiches for a six-person orgy?
25:35No smoked fish, that's all I...
25:40Richard?
25:41Er, something...
25:42There's plenty of protein.
25:43Yes, plenty.
25:44Wise answer. Angela?
25:45OK, erm, I'm going to go with sprouts, avocado, bitter tomato,
25:50mustard, but the American kind, not with the real kick-toons.
25:53Exactly, because just because you're indulging in some heavy tromboning
25:56doesn't mean you can't be healthy.
25:57Exactly.
25:58Kate?
25:59Are we genuinely going round all six of us?
26:01Yes, yes!
26:02But there's six of us!
26:03Ah!
26:06Can I just... Don't leave me out!
26:09I've got plenty to give!
26:11Sue, can you nip down Pratt?
26:12We're all going to get on with that.
26:13I don't have to do that!
26:15What do you have, Kate?
26:16What would you have?
26:17I think I'd have a cheese and pickle sandwich.
26:19Ooh!
26:20Classic.
26:20Josh?
26:21Toasted sandwich, I'd get the brevel out.
26:23Oh!
26:24That sounds even more important.
26:26I'd have a torpedo roll.
26:29Josh, well done.
26:31You win the Mo!
26:32Woo-hoo!
26:36Right, everybody, let's play Finish the Fact,
26:39and then we can get stuck into a six-person orgy.
26:41I'm going to start by reading out of Mo-based German.
26:44You're going to buzz in when you think you know how it ends.
26:46We're going to start with the former Harrods boss,
26:48Mohammed Al-Fayed.
26:50When Mohammed Al-Fayed got a Dubai passport,
26:53he made himself...
26:55Was it a torpedo roll?
26:57After the passport, he made himself four years younger,
27:02and he changed what?
27:04Sex.
27:05Nationality.
27:09Do you know what?
27:10I'll give you that.
27:11He changed his place of birth from Alexandria to Al-Fayedia.
27:16So, well done, yeah.
27:18Wow.
27:19Just outside made up here, if you're interested in going.
27:21This is, according to his unauthorised biographer, Tom Boer.
27:25Well done, Angela, and well done, Richard's team.
27:26You win the Mo!
27:27Well done!
27:33So, we've come to the end of the show,
27:34and I can tell you that tonight's winners, with the most Mo's...
27:38Josh's team!
27:39Congratulations!
27:40It had to happen.
27:46Who are you going to name, now you're the victor,
27:48as the greatest Mo of all time?
27:51I think, genuinely, Mohammed Ali is not just the best Mo,
27:55he's one of the greatest people that has ever lived.
27:57So, I'm going to go with Maureen from driving school.
27:59LAUGHTER
28:01No, I'm going to go with Mohammed Ali.
28:03A wonderful choice.
28:04CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
28:07I hear by the third,
28:08Mohammed Ali, the greatest Mo of all time, a great choice.
28:12Well done, Josh's team.
28:13You get to take home a fantastic prize,
28:15which is this Mohammed Ali album.
28:18Wow.
28:23No-one leave the show empty-handed.
28:25Richard, you get Michael Caine's murderous right hand.
28:29CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
28:33And his left hand.
28:35Woo!
28:35Oh, nice.
28:36And his middle hand.
28:39Woo!
28:40My thanks to all of our guests,
28:41special thanks to all the Mo's here, there and everywhere,
28:43but most of all, thanks to you at home for watching us.
28:46Good night.
28:47CHEERING AND APPLAUSE
28:59Good night.
29:02Woo!
29:04Touchdown!
29:08&uccess.
29:09Thank you again.
29:11The Mo's here to be a express���