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Short filmTranscript
00:00No!
00:23Touching creep.
00:25What?
00:27What?
00:28Hey.
00:29Hold on.
00:38Vodka. Neat.
00:40Please.
00:45I miss having a man around to take her out the trash.
00:52You got dumped?
00:55Yeah.
00:56Sucks.
01:01Did you love her?
01:03Not sure it mattered.
01:04Her 50,000 followers loved her, and that's all she cared about.
01:08Well, if she's too busy counting likes to see you, she doesn't know you.
01:13And her opinion is shit.
01:15Okay, it is time for our lovely wild jackals to get up and wag those tails.
01:25Come on, wag them!
01:26Yeah!
01:28Oh, dude.
01:29This is what I was telling you about.
01:30Oh, dude.
01:31This is what I was telling you about.
01:32Well, it's time for her.
01:33Come on now, man.
01:34Come on, man.
01:35No, I'm coming up.
01:36No, man.
01:38No, man.
01:39No, man.
01:40No, man.
01:41No, man.
01:42Oh, yeah, no.
01:44No, man.
01:45No.
01:47How about a game of pool?
02:13Bet you 300, I'll win.
02:16You're enjoying this.
02:27Come on, get over here.
02:31Show me how it's done.
02:33Yes, ma'am.
02:37There we go, okay.
02:43How old are you?
02:50Never mind, don't answer that.
02:54I love your accent.
02:56Australian?
02:57Sort of.
02:58My mom moved to Adelaide when I was a baby, and then we moved back when I was 16.
03:04Eight ball corner pocket.
03:13Boom!
03:15My Benjamins, please.
03:22You carry that much gash?
03:25But that was sus.
03:26I feel like I've been hustled.
03:28No.
03:29No.
03:30No.
03:31You're a wonderful teacher.
03:41I wish I got his number.
03:51I wish I got his number.
04:02Your name.
04:04Class.
04:05We have class.
04:08Dakota, honey, wake up.
04:12It's our first day.
04:13I've already made coffee.
04:14That's the daughter in the world.
04:17Mom, you need a shower.
04:24Yeah, I do.
04:31Oh no, this is humiliating.
04:44I can't go in there looking like I bled all over myself.
04:51Not to mention, I'm nearly twice people's ages.
04:54Mom, I've got to close my jetpack on the end of-
04:58Oh, yes!
05:03How'd you get to be so awesome?
05:05All right, I love you.
05:10I've got to get you a glass.
05:11All right, bye.
05:19Hello?
05:20Hi, Caitlin.
05:22This is Helen Brooks.
05:24Who's Brooks?
05:25Hello.
05:26Hello?
05:27You weren't.
05:28You got my notice, I hope.
05:29Of course.
05:30Yes.
05:31Now, you quit in order to pursue a degree at Warren University.
05:34Correct?
05:35Yeah, that's right.
05:36I would like to employ your matchmaking skills.
05:38I'll continue your weekly assistant wage.
05:41I'm sure you could use some money.
05:43Oh, well, I definitely could, but-
05:45My son, Julian, is attending graduate school.
05:47Need to keep him away from gold digging and slutty bar types and steer him back to his charming ex-girlfriend, Gabriella Warren.
05:55Now, it's very important.
05:57Our livelihood depends on it.
05:59Sounds easy enough.
06:00Excellent.
06:01And if you can secure an engagement with Gabriella, you can expect a year's wages bonus on top of it.
06:09Oh, wow.
06:11You can count on me, Ms. Brooks.
06:13Sending you his contact card now.
06:15Good luck.
06:17That's a $40,000 bonus.
06:21I can't see this photo at all.
06:27Can this get any worse?
06:44Well, if everyone could just, uh, sign in using the QR code before we done it.
06:49Please.
06:50No.
06:51Damn it.
06:52No, no, no, no.
06:53Of course, I would forget to plug in my phone last night.
06:57Excuse me, sir, do you have a paper sign in?
07:04My phone died.
07:05No, damn it. No, no, no, no. Of course I would forget to plug in my phone last night.
07:15Excuse me, sir. Do you have a paper sign in? My phone died.
07:28It's you.
07:32It's you.
07:33Oh, really nice to see you. So moist.
07:44Okay, you're a baby. How are you, professor?
07:49I'm a TA, actually. I'm a grad student.
07:52Why don't you put your name, email, and phone number down here at the bottom?
08:03Ah, Caitlin.
08:09Why don't you take a seat up front? I want a good view.
08:14All right. Into the snake pit.
08:30Good move. I bet it was really hard for you to see from the back.
08:34Mal, respect your elders. I like your shirt. You are so brave.
08:43Thank you. It's my daughter's. I did not plan on wearing this today.
08:48How old is your daughter?
08:5018. She's actually a student here, too.
08:53Shut up.
08:55Shut up. So what are you like? 50?
09:00Caitlin.
09:01I'm Mallory. You look really good for 50.
09:05Gabriella. Gabriella Warren.
09:08And that's her? Julian's ex? Seems awful. What would Helen want with her?
09:16Oh, how funny. Warren liked the school.
09:19Yeah, my dad donated 100 mil, so they named the whole school after him.
09:26Wow. Wow.
09:31Okay, that's what Helen sees in her.
09:34Gabs, you're totally going to ace this class.
09:36Look at that poor TA.
09:38He's totally still simping over you.
09:43You know, I heard that he rebounded with some bar whore last night.
09:55Whatever. Now that he's slumming it, he'll miss me more.
10:00Welcome to microeconomics, everyone.
10:06Professor Nelson will be back next class, but in the meantime, we're going to take a quick poll.
10:21So could everyone hit that link, please?
10:23See you, Gabby.
10:49See you, Gabby.
10:49See you, Gabby.
10:53Thanks. You saved me.
11:01You can keep him if you want.
11:02Oh, no, I couldn't.
11:04I insist.
11:07As mine as yours.
11:08I need to pee.
11:12Caitlin, wait.
11:14I can't stop thinking about you.
11:17And now you're in my class.
11:20It's got to be fate, right?
11:22Crisis agenda's playing next week.
11:24They are my favorite.
11:25Come with me.
11:27As my girlfriend.
11:28I really got to go.
11:31I'll be right back.
11:37Helen Brooks' son?
11:39Why would he be calling me?
11:42You better come back.
11:47Holy hell, that is Julian Brooks.
11:49Fuck, you hooked up with Helen Brooks' son.
11:58How am I supposed to take this job now?
12:01He is young, but he's beautiful, smart, rich.
12:09Do you think she meant to be together?
12:13Stop it!
12:16It's too messy working for Helen.
12:19I think I want to give Julian a chance.
12:26Wake up, Caitlin.
12:36Julian's an entitled rich child with no idea who or what he wants.
12:41He's nothing more than a payday.
12:51Mission Warren Brooks accepted.
12:54Make it rain Cupid's fucking arrows.
13:06Hey there.
13:15You are aside for sore eyes.
13:17Hi, Bobby.
13:19Come here, come here, come here.
13:20I want to see my little money magnet.
13:22Come on, come on, come on.
13:23You know, for an old broad,
13:25you really do know how to shake that tail and reel that dough in.
13:29Wow, thanks, Bobby.
13:30That means a lot.
13:31You did some really great sales last night, baby.
13:34Real great.
13:34But I got a question.
13:36When were you planning on cutting me in?
13:39What?
13:42Security camera.
13:43Oh, hey there.
13:43Yeah.
13:46Yeah, I saw you.
13:47I saw that John gave you a wad of cash
13:48and then you fucked on my pool table.
13:53Shit!
13:54Totally forgot about the cameras.
13:56Julian empties my brain.
13:57Baby, baby, baby, baby.
14:00Don't be ashamed.
14:01That was some hot stuff.
14:03I washed it a few times.
14:04No, we've got it drunk.
14:06This is what we're going to do.
14:07I'm going to drum up some jaunts for you
14:09and then we'll split it 50-50.
14:11No, Bobby.
14:12He would never pay for sex.
14:13I would never do that.
14:14It was a bet.
14:15I'm not a goddamn moron, Katie.
14:18Now, come on.
14:18You don't like this deal?
14:20We're going to rip a day shade.
14:21That means you owe me
14:22that two weeks advance I gave you.
14:24This is crazy, Bobby.
14:26That advance went towards my rent.
14:28I am absolutely not a hooker.
14:31Oh, yeah.
14:32And my balls taste like bubble gum.
14:35Oh, you know,
14:37there are plenty of ways to earn it, baby.
14:46Hey, we're closed.
14:47Get out of here.
14:48Get the fuck away from here.
14:53I wasn't going to look for...
14:54Wait a minute.
14:55You're the guy.
14:56Huh?
14:57You're the John from the video?
14:58What the hell are you talking about?
15:01Oh, let me go, you pretty boy.
15:02That seems like you can't do much from there.
15:04I got you both on videos.
15:07America's sluttiest home videos.
15:09That's just going to fuck up her life.
15:10But I'll gladly put you down to her shit pile, too.
15:13Yeah, it's messed up.
15:15She got us.
15:18Listen, you don't have the balls to off me.
15:20I know that.
15:21So this is what we're going to do.
15:22Give you $10,000 and that video, it disappears.
15:25I think you underestimate my connections, creep.
15:34You're going to destroy that hard drive
15:36and apologize to Caitlin or else I make a call.
15:39You got me.
15:47You're pretty good.
15:48You know what?
15:49The price just went up.
15:50About $20,000 now.
15:52No need, Julian.
15:55We're good.
15:55You slutty little thief.
16:03You know, Bobby, a few nights ago,
16:07you partied with some very young girls
16:09with very bad fake IDs.
16:12I wonder if that's on here.
16:14I dictate the terms now.
16:16This comes home with me.
16:18I'm sure your tech-challenged ass
16:21didn't think to make copies.
16:23I am going to leave here,
16:25keep my money,
16:27and never have to see your nasty face
16:31or balls ever again.
16:35Now you can suck it, scumbag.
16:39I quit.
16:44Holy shit!
16:46That was amazing!
16:47You were amazing!
16:49How did you know that I was about to...
17:08Oh, Julian, I...
17:12I need you.
17:31Now.
17:32Get in the car.
17:33Your wish is my command.
17:35Smooth, the way that you're looking in your eye.
17:39New, started us with one the night of you.
17:44Your lips, they taste like whiskey.
17:47Yeah, remove.
17:49But you'll get...
17:51What?
17:54What's wrong?
17:59What's this room?
18:05Shit, I never told him I had a kid.
18:07Now I quit my job,
18:08and his mom's money is the only thing I have.
18:10Caitlin, are you okay?
18:13Fuck!
18:13I need to get out of my own way
18:15and focus on paying rent.
18:17Uh, this was a mistake.
18:18No, no, no, no, it's not.
18:20What's going on?
18:22That scar.
18:23It's from my C-section.
18:26I have a daughter.
18:29Dakota, she's...
18:30also a freshman at Warren and Shared.
18:35I know, it's a lot to take in.
18:37I'm sorry.
18:38Wait, wait, wait, wait.
18:39I, um, are you married?
18:41What?
18:42No!
18:44Look, I...
18:46I can't deny that I feel something for you,
18:49but it's never going to work between us.
18:53I'm...
18:54I'm too old for you.
18:58It's...
18:59embarrassing for both of us.
19:05Embarrassing.
19:12Thank you for your help today.
19:14Yeah.
19:15Um...
19:16Okay.
19:26Eyes on the prize.
19:35Forget about Julian.
19:36Focus on Gabriela.
19:38She broke up with him.
19:39All I need to do is convince her to take him back.
19:41Okay.
19:42Do you mind?
19:51Yes, we do mind.
19:55I brought cookies.
19:57Yes.
19:58Leaves.
19:58Oh, and suddenly I'm all amped up for economics.
20:24Mmm, he is the whole meal.
20:28I know.
20:29Damn, they're not kidding.
20:31Hello, all you beautiful people.
20:32It's nice to see you.
20:33I am Professor Nelson, back from my conference.
20:36Apologies about missing the first day.
20:38I guess you could say the demand for me was a bit bigger than my supply.
20:43Sorry, just hitting you with a little economics humor.
20:46Huey thinks it's a joke.
20:47Katelyn?
20:57Um...
20:57Katelyn West?
20:59Is that you?
21:02Yes.
21:03Hi.
21:06Oh, I'm sorry.
21:06I might not be West anymore.
21:08It's still West.
21:09Or I made my way back out West.
21:14Oh, yikes.
21:15You, uh, you don't remember me, do you?
21:17Ross, my roommate dated yours freshman year at Yale.
21:22You went to Yale?
21:23Oh, he's the scrawny guy who was always asking me if I dumped Frank yet?
21:29Ross?
21:30Yeah, I didn't even recognize you.
21:32Wow, you look so different.
21:34Yeah, late bloomer.
21:39So, um, are you dumb Frank?
21:45Nice.
21:47Let's, uh, let's catch up after class, yeah?
21:58Okay, what gives?
22:00Yale?
22:01Are you a low-key genius?
22:03Oh, it's not much of a story.
22:05I went to school there for a semester for dance, but I dropped out because I got pregnant.
22:10You got accepted to Yale for dance?
22:14You're my hero.
22:15Yeah.
22:15And you're a mad-pulling, sexy professor.
22:18I mean, look at him.
22:21Katelyn!
22:22You're on a mission.
22:23Oh, you know, you and Julian looked mighty cozy yesterday.
22:28You two would make a really cute couple.
22:30Yeah.
22:31They totes were a super cute couple.
22:34It got stale.
22:36I broke things off to spice things up.
22:39Might be time again, though.
22:42Poor guy looks miserable.
22:43So, you should invite him to the Crisis Agenda concert.
22:47I overheard him saying how much he wants to go.
22:50That's such a good idea.
23:02Fire.
23:02Yeah, that'd be great.
23:04I want to work on VIP tickets, you want to work made cops?
23:07VIP.
23:11Katelyn!
23:13I am so sorry for acting so weird the other day.
23:22I understand.
23:23That was a lot to take in.
23:26Look, we made the right choice.
23:27No, you didn't give me a choice.
23:30None of that stuff matters to me.
23:31I need someone more my age, Julian.
23:34It matters to me.
23:36What's going on here?
23:38Feels like I walked into something.
23:39Homework stuff.
23:41Julian marked my paper about Furbies.
23:42He is too young to remember that fiasco.
23:46And I was just telling her that since homework grades aren't recorded, it doesn't matter.
23:52Well, sounds like it's all settled.
23:55Now, Katelyn, I have a bone to pick with you.
23:58Oh, to you?
23:59Yes, you were about to leave before I could get the chance to ask you out.
24:03For a coffee, you know, to catch up his old friends.
24:09I would never date a student.
24:10That would be unethical.
24:12Don't let me stand in the way of a reunion.
24:18Oh, great.
24:26Another hot guy you aren't allowed to date, Katelyn.
24:28Aw, he really does seem into me.
24:34And that shirt.
24:36Rolled up sleeves.
24:37My kryptonite.
24:39Okay, he's my professor, but coffee is harmless, right?
24:46Coffee would be nice.
24:49Great.
24:50I can't wait.
24:50Put your number in my phone.
24:56Oh, shoot.
24:58I think I locked it.
24:59Sorry, I'm bad with Androids.
25:11See you later.
25:11See you later.
25:11Good day.
25:22Oh, yes.
25:23I love dance.
25:25Well, I hate to harsh your buzz, but I had to quit my night job.
25:30Thank God.
25:31That place gave me the creeps.
25:33But I got a new offer.
25:35It's strange, though.
25:36It's not a strip club, is it?
25:39No.
25:39But it is with my old boss, Helen Brooks.
25:42She wants me to play matchmaker to her son, Julian.
25:47What?
25:47That's weird.
25:48Yep.
25:49It's with his ex, Gabriella Warren.
25:52Her dad is a client, and he's loaded, so I'm sure she wants to keep him.
26:08Jody?
26:10You okay?
26:11I'm fine.
26:13I got to realize I'm a dance class.
26:14Hmm.
26:15I mean, I could help you.
26:17I want to help you.
26:18I could get close to her.
26:22Yeah.
26:23Yeah?
26:24Yeah.
26:24How about upgrading that coffee to a nightcap?
26:32Tempting, but I really need to catch up on sleep.
26:36Coffee next Saturday?
26:38Six reasons you should reconsider.
26:40Oh, Caitlin.
26:46Yo.
26:48Caitlin.
26:49What?
26:50Sorry.
26:51I have an idea.
26:52So, it's clear that Gabriella has no dance training.
26:54It shows.
26:55I was thinking maybe we could ask if she wanted a coach.
27:00We could get close to her, gain her trust, make Julian look good, or whatever.
27:05Hmm.
27:06Not that Julian needs in that department.
27:14Mom.
27:16Sorry.
27:18I got distracted.
27:18Sound good?
27:19That sounds like a great idea, love.
27:25Dope.
27:26Making it happen.
27:27Julian, you need to move on.
27:29This is inappropriate.
27:30No means no.
27:34No!
27:35Please don't!
27:39Seriously, chat?
27:40Am I cooked?
27:42This hurts like a mother.
27:44Nothing worth having comes easy.
27:46Gabs, you got this.
27:47And you're slaying.
27:50But you do need both of your hands.
27:53Fine.
27:55Keep it a hundred hotties.
28:03Remind me of Julian.
28:06He was telling me to get off my phone.
28:09I don't think it gets me.
28:11Yet somehow he can read my mind.
28:17You two probably have more in common than you realize.
28:21You do need to stay present to get to know somebody.
28:24You know what I don't get?
28:25You're basically a full-time influencer.
28:27What's up with all this pointless sweat?
28:29Pop off, Mal.
28:31Sound like my dad.
28:33Yeah.
28:36It's not always about a quick buck.
28:38No.
28:40Dancing
28:40is about the soul.
28:42See, I wouldn't do that.
28:56I can't even.
28:57You guys are so lame.
28:58It was better not be for me.
29:11That will kill all chances with Gabriela.
29:13I don't know if you're a fan of Gabriela.
29:17Flowers?
29:18Yeah, I've been watching your stream.
29:20Didn't know you were a fan.
29:21Oh, yeah.
29:22I'm enjoying your journey.
29:25I tried to DM you, but no response.
29:27So here I am the old-fashioned way.
29:30Aw, you're so sweet.
29:33Want to hang out after?
29:35We're almost done.
29:36Uh, Boba?
29:37Oh, wouldn't love that.
29:39Oh, um, you guys don't mind, do you?
29:41Oh, Julian, this is Dakota.
29:45She's the best ever.
29:47Hmm.
29:49Long as we stay focused.
29:51Do you want to practice your jeté again?
30:05Woo!
30:06Yeah.
30:07Yes!
30:07Really think about kicking high with that leading leg
30:14and gliding across the floor.
30:33Mom, don't you have a date with a sexy professor tonight?
30:37It's not a date.
30:38We are catching up over coffee.
30:39Oh, why were you refreshing after Caitlin after class?
30:42And it seems urgent.
30:44Oh, um, well, I met Caitlin.
30:46For tutoring.
30:48And Julian didn't think it was fair to tutor me alone.
30:51So he suggested we all have a study group.
30:55I love that idea.
30:57Let's do it.
30:59Perfect.
31:00I got to go, kids.
31:01Oh, uh, Caitlin.
31:03Wait up.
31:03Gabriela is sweet.
31:17She's closer to your age and she's learning to live off her phone.
31:21I mean, that was the issue, right?
31:24Please don't screw this up by chasing after me.
31:26Are you really saying Professor Nelson?
31:31He's kind of a jerk.
31:32No.
31:34Maybe.
31:35That's between me and him.
31:38Back off or I'll have to report you to admin for harassment.
31:41I'll have to report you to admin for harassment.