Comedy (2003) 90 minutes ~ Color
Making a movie in Hollywood looked easy, especially when you're a sexy aspiring film maker. Sarah Wilder arrives in Hollywood ready to start her career by making her first picture. Sarah's only contact is her Uncle Lou who was a screenwriter in the old days of the studio system. With his guidance and connections, she embarks on a wild journey into the world of Hollywood, where she encounters crazy studio executives, insane producers, and a gangster who agrees to finance her film ... for a price.
Music by The Black Eyed Peas (right before they became real famous!!!)
Director: William Tannen
Writer: David Pasquesi
Stars: Linda Black, Alan Blumenfeld, Carmine Caridi, Mike Myers, Janeane Garofalo, Ben Stiller
We have over 15,000 titles available for licensing to VOD Platforms. Contact: sales @echelonstudios.us
Making a movie in Hollywood looked easy, especially when you're a sexy aspiring film maker. Sarah Wilder arrives in Hollywood ready to start her career by making her first picture. Sarah's only contact is her Uncle Lou who was a screenwriter in the old days of the studio system. With his guidance and connections, she embarks on a wild journey into the world of Hollywood, where she encounters crazy studio executives, insane producers, and a gangster who agrees to finance her film ... for a price.
Music by The Black Eyed Peas (right before they became real famous!!!)
Director: William Tannen
Writer: David Pasquesi
Stars: Linda Black, Alan Blumenfeld, Carmine Caridi, Mike Myers, Janeane Garofalo, Ben Stiller
We have over 15,000 titles available for licensing to VOD Platforms. Contact: sales @echelonstudios.us
Category
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Short filmTranscript
00:00Yeah, you did.
00:04You know, Blue Smoke played with the group dance boys.
00:08Really?
00:10I mean, he could have.
00:12Somebody's got the music in him.
00:16Not anymore. Let's see him.
00:20Just drive.
00:22I'm doing stuff over here you couldn't even comprehend.
00:25Beretta 9mm?
00:28This makes it official.
00:30We're crooks.
00:31That's cool.
00:34.45? Lucky.
00:36That's an expensive gun.
00:38Only two things nicer than an expensive gun.
00:40That'd be your Swiss watch and your pretty girl.
00:42What's that pretty girl's name? Is it pretty?
00:44Is it pretty?
00:45Yeah, Jolly. Yeah, Jolly. Down the ditch, Jolly.
00:47Jolly, down the ditch. Now, Jolly.
00:52That never happens again.
00:55Never.
00:59We live and die by the risk of the heist.
01:01What?
01:02We live and die by the risk of the heist.
01:04What does that mean?
01:05Right now, nothing.
01:09How'd they get this car?
01:11It was Miranda's car. Jimmy's wife.
01:14They didn't steal it or jack it?
01:16No.
01:17Let me get this straight.
01:19They're planning a robbery,
01:21and they're gonna use a car that belongs to his wife?
01:23What, are they idiots?
01:25They aren't the two brightest skies in the world.
01:27Hero.
01:28Okay, good one.
01:30We get in there, and there's a dumb guy who wants to be a hero.
01:32Okay, how dumb are we talking?
01:34All right, everything's going as planned, right?
01:36Smooth as silk, just like clockwork.
01:38All of a sudden, some guy hops up off the floor
01:40and figures, hey, this is a good time to get in the newspapers.
01:42I'll foil this robbery.
01:44I'm a hero! I'm a hero! React!
01:46Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah.
01:48All right, you better just dial it down, all right?
01:50Just dial it down, numb nuts,
01:52before Mr. Thundermaker starts shitting some bullets.
02:02Don't worry. Take another one.
02:04This is going great.
02:06You're doing well.
02:08Pregnant woman's water poops.
02:09Pops.
02:10Pops. Pops.
02:11Pregnant woman's water poops.
02:15Oh, my God!
02:17I'm having my baby!
02:20Blanket of napalm.
02:29Yeah.
02:31Morons. This picture's about two morons.
02:34Jimmy and Virus had practiced and rehearsed the robbery for days.
02:38It was the hardest work they'd done since, well, ever.
02:41And there was no turning back.
02:43This was it, their moment of truth.
02:45We just parked the car. We walked the block, the location.
02:47We walked slow. We're just two guys walking.
02:49What if we see cops?
02:50It doesn't matter. We're just two guys walking.
02:52We're just two guys that happen to be walking.
02:54We determine the area's secure.
02:55Then we move forward. We're at the entrance.
02:56We pull out the guns. We run in.
02:57We grab the money. We run out.
02:58How long are we gonna be there?
02:59Two minutes.
03:00Two minutes tops.
03:01Not two and a half, not three.
03:02Two minutes.
03:03Let's try one.
03:18You ready?
03:19Candy from a bank.
03:20On your mark.
03:22Set.
03:24Go.
03:29What's the name of this store, please?
03:32McClintock's Grocery.
03:36We're here.
03:37We've just done some remodeling.
03:38That's nice.
03:40Not necessary.
03:41All right, listen up, people.
03:43This is a robbery.
03:44We don't want any trouble.
03:45So if you want to be stupid,
03:47let's do it now and get it over with.
03:51Look, nobody plays tough guy but me.
03:54All right?
03:55We have a gun and we got a car, okay?
03:58So we live and die by the risk of the highest.
04:00Hey, fellas.
04:02There's no need for all the shouting.
04:04If you're here for the peaches,
04:06I'm sure we can work something out.
04:08I think I'm sick of this.
04:11I'm sure we can work something out.
04:13I think I'm speaking for the group
04:15when I say nobody here wants to take a bullet.
04:18I know I don't.
04:20Hey, you need to do some shopping?
04:22Great time.
04:25Look, he's cool.
04:26Let's go, huh?
04:27Just like we planned.
04:28Look, wipe that Curly Joe smile off your stupid nose
04:30and just open the register.
04:32You don't have to take that, Lawrence.
04:33Shut up!
04:34You apron-wearing, fake-tooth, pie-baked behavior.
04:37Hey, hey, hey, whoa, whoa, whoa.
04:38Come on.
04:39You don't have to be mean.
04:40It's what we say.
04:41We got guns.
04:42Back off, you beanpole,
04:44Ichabod Cream motherfucker!
04:46I don't remember rehearsing this part.
04:48This whole thing was your idea,
04:49so if I don't meet your expectations
04:50of what a professional grocery store robber should be,
04:52I'd like to take this time to apologize
04:54in front of all the fine folks here at McClintock's.
04:57Hey, everybody!
04:58Peaches on me!
05:03Hey, uh...
05:05Well, we're a little behind,
05:07but we're still professionals.
05:09We deserve better than this.
05:11No, you don't.
05:12But you know what does?
05:14This cow!
05:15This cow deserves better than this!
05:18You and your big McClintock's market!
05:20I got raw meat!
05:22I am crazy!
05:23So let's make with that cash and coin, Colonel Tom!
05:25I do it! He ain't right!
05:26Come on, all of it!
05:27Safe too!
05:28You want to pitch in and help out with that?
05:30All right, now, see, this is why I wanted you to go to the bank...
05:33There's no time for that, dear, now.
05:34These fellas seem to be in a hurry.
05:36No, you had to watch the dog.
05:37Let's all pitch in.
05:38Come on! Geez, come on!
05:40If you have a few more dollars,
05:41we're gonna save to give to the church,
05:43but you might as well take the whole thing.
05:46Thank you, ma'am.
05:50Take us home!
05:51Clean, that's it!
05:52Let's go!
05:54Now!