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Short filmTranscript
00:00Come ride the little train that is rolling down the tracks to the junction, forget about
00:12your cares, it is time to relax at the junction, lots of curves, you'll bet even more when
00:22you're getting to the junction, Petticoat Junction.
00:31There's a little hotel called the Shady Rest at the junction, Petticoat Junction, it is
00:38run by Kate, come and be her guest at the junction, Petticoat Junction, and that's Uncle
00:45Joe, he's a-movin' kinda slow at the junction, Petticoat Junction.
01:02Step to the left, to the right, then hop with your partner, that's the Hooderville Hop,
01:08three to the left, to the right, then hop with your partner, it's the Hooderville Hop,
01:13lots of fun to do, it's a step that's new, just a hop, hop, called the Hooderville Hop,
01:20form in a line anyway is fine, when you hop, hop, to the Hooderville Hop, you can dance
01:26with two, three, or four will do, when you hop, hop, to the Hooderville Hop, it's a brand
01:32new step, full of brim and pep, just a hop, hop, it's the Hooderville Hop.
01:38Hi kids, where's Billy?
01:40Hi Ma, you know Paul Henderson.
01:42Oh sure, hi Paul.
01:43Hi Mrs. Bradley.
01:44Where's Billy Joan?
01:45Ma, this is a new dance Paul's dreamed up.
01:46He calls it the Hooderville Hop.
01:47Well, where's Billy Joan?
01:48All the kids are learning it for the school dance.
01:51Come on Mrs. Bradley, it's real easy.
01:52Oh no, no, no, wait a minute, this letter is very important, I gotta find Billy Joan,
01:57now where is she?
01:58Come on Ma, you're getting it.
02:08Great Mrs. Bradley.
02:09Ma, that's it, you've got it.
02:11I have?
02:12Yeah.
02:13I don't want it, I want Billy Joan, now where is she?
02:15She's outside somewhere with Junior Hawker, they went down to the lake to practice.
02:19Practice what?
02:20Archery.
02:21You know, bows and arrows.
02:22Oh, Paul do me a favor, run down to the lake and bring her back, I've got the most wonderful
02:27surprise for her.
02:28Sure Mrs. Bradley.
02:29Mom, what is it?
02:30Come on over here, sit down, I'll tell you all about it.
02:34Your sister, Billy Jo, is gonna be a doctor.
02:37Doctor?
02:39Billy Jo?
02:41The blonde bombshell?
02:43Billy.
02:44Hooderville's own Tuesday Weld?
02:46Bobby.
02:47Miss built best from Shady Rest?
02:49Now that's enough.
02:51Your sister, Billy Jo, happens to have a beautiful face and a curvy figure,
02:56so what's wrong with that?
02:57Nothing, that's great.
02:58Especially if you're a girl.
03:00But a doctor?
03:01Could you two high school know-it-alls bear to let your mother talk for a minute?
03:05Sure mom.
03:06Sorry.
03:07Well, before you girls were born, in fact the day before Billy Jo was born,
03:12your father, rest his soul, took out an endowment policy to send his son to medical school.
03:18Son?
03:20Like all men, he was convinced that his first child was gonna be a boy.
03:24He had his name and his career all picked out.
03:27William Junior, Dr. Bill Bradley.
03:30Gee, I'll bet dad was disappointed when Billy turned out to be a girl.
03:34Not after he saw her.
03:36Then he was the proudest father in this whole valley.
03:39And then when we were expecting you, Bobby Jo, the same thing started all over again.
03:45Only now it was Robert, Dr. Bob Bradley.
03:49And I had to go and let him down again.
03:51And I had to go and let him down again.
03:53Boy, he must have really flipped when I showed up.
03:56No.
03:57Your father loved all of you with all his heart.
04:00Why, he wouldn't have traded you three girls for the Mayo brothers.
04:04Why don't we talk about Billy Jo becoming a doctor?
04:07Well, when Bill, your father, saw for himself that he had an all-girl family,
04:13he went back to his original plan of sending his first child to medical school.
04:18I remember when Billy Jo was yay high, he used to introduce her as my daughter, the doctor.
04:25Hey, Mrs. Bradley, is Billy Jo ever unnatural for Audrey?
04:28Junior says I have almost perfect form already.
04:31Uh, yeah.
04:32Good drink, Doc. Nice going, Willie Boy.
04:35Doc!
04:36Willie Boy.
04:37Pay no attention to these high school cut-ups.
04:39Billy Jo, I've got the most marvelous surprise for you.
04:42Look at this check.
04:43For me?
04:44From an endowment policy your father took out for you.
04:47Five hundred dollars?
04:49Mom, that means I can do what I've been planning and dreaming about for so long.
04:53That's right.
04:54I can go to Hollywood.
04:56What?
05:01Hey, hey, Paul. Hey, there are two over there. This one's mine.
05:05You dreamer.
05:10Junior.
05:11Yeah?
05:12No, no, I want to dance. I want to talk to Billy Jo.
05:25Billy, the last thing in the world your father'd want is to make you do something against your will.
05:30But it was his last wish, so give it a lot of consideration.
05:33Of course I will, Mom.
05:36But I have to be honest and tell you that what I really want to do
05:40is go to Hollywood and become an actress.
05:43Oh, Mom, just think of meeting Rock Hudson
05:46or even playing a love scene with him.
05:50Honey, every year thousands of girls go to Hollywood to try and be actresses.
05:55Young, beautiful, talented, just like you.
05:58And most of them come back home broken-hearted.
06:00Or what's even worse, they stay there broken-hearted.
06:03But some of them make it.
06:05Somebody has to play opposite Rock Hudson.
06:08And maybe I'll be the one.
06:10Maybe I'll become famous.
06:12Maybe.
06:13And when I do, I'll send for you, Mom.
06:15You and Bobby and Betty and Uncle Joe.
06:17And you won't have to work anymore.
06:19Well, you can come live with me in Hollywood.
06:21What's this about Hollywood?
06:22Uncle Joe, look what I got.
06:25It's from that endowment policy Bill took on.
06:28Five hundred dollars?
06:30You know what she wants to do with it?
06:31She wants to go to Hollywood and try and be an actress.
06:34Billy Joe, Hollywood's no place for a young, innocent girl like you.
06:38You see?
06:39Why, them wolves would be after you the minute you got there.
06:41That's right.
06:42Well, they might promise you they'd get you into pictures,
06:44but dollars to donuts you'd never see the inside of a studio.
06:47Oh, honey, I'd be worried out of my mind.
06:49Sure she would.
06:51You can stop worrying, Kate.
06:52I'll go to Hollywood with her and be her manager.
06:55Uncle Joe!
06:57It is Uncle Joe.
07:04Hi, Floyd.
07:05Hi, Kate. Going shopping?
07:07No, I'm going in to see Dr. DePue.
07:09You ain't sick, are you?
07:10Oh, no.
07:11I'm hoping to get the doctor to come out and talk to Billy Joe.
07:18Warden, let her know, Charlie.
07:22Can't you see I'm all in the journal, Smokehead?
07:25Oh, yeah.
07:26I'm sure you can.
07:27I'm sure you can.
07:28I'm sure you can.
07:29I'm sure you can.
07:30I'm sure you can.
07:31Smokehead.
07:32Oh, yeah.
07:33Sorry.
07:40We're all in the journals, ladies.
07:42I'll have to take back that board for a couple of minutes.
07:46Floyd.
07:50Where'd all the women come from?
07:52Pixley.
07:53They're all going in to Dr. DePue's office, too.
07:55What's wrong with the doctor in Pixley?
07:57He ain't young, single, and good looking.
08:00Neither is Dr. DePue.
08:02No, but his young assistant sure is.
08:04Young city doctor, name of Harris.
08:07Real handsome, huh?
08:09Kate, I hear you don't even have to tell the women to say ah.
08:12They say it the minute they see him.
08:14No fooling.
08:16Kind of Rock Hudson type, huh?
08:19Who's he?
08:21Never mind, Floyd.
08:22Sit down.
08:23I'd like to tell you about my daughter, the doctor.
08:30Oh.
08:48Hello, Dr. DePue?
08:50This is Kate Bradley.
08:52No, there's nothing wrong.
08:55I hear you have a real handsome new assistant.
09:00I know he's too young for me.
09:02I want him to come out to Shady Rest
09:04and get Billy Joe interested in medical school.
09:08She wants to go to Hollywood.
09:10Tell him it's an emergency,
09:12a real puzzle in case you can't figure out.
09:15And you won't be lying, because I'm thinking of Uncle Joe.
09:19Oh, wonderful.
09:20The boys are turning the train around,
09:22so send him right down to the station.
09:24Yeah, bye.
09:31Dr. Harris?
09:32Yes?
09:34My, my.
09:36I beg your pardon?
09:38My, um, my uncle is very sick.
09:41Oh, you must be the Mrs. Bradley Dr. DePue told me about.
09:44Yes.
09:45Let's get aboard, shall we?
09:54You go sit down, Doctor. I'll be right back.
10:01Let her go, Charlie.
10:18Oh, look out there. Isn't that interesting?
10:24What's so interesting?
10:26Ha, he's gone now.
10:31Well, tell me about your uncle.
10:34If he's got Dr. DePue puzzled, he must be quite a case.
10:37Oh, he is quite a case.
10:40I was, um, I was hoping that you and, uh,
10:43my daughter could have a consultation about him.
10:46Oh, you have a daughter who's a doctor?
10:48Well, not yet, but I have great hopes for her.
10:50Especially now.
10:52Dr. DePue tells me that you have three daughters,
10:55all of them beautiful.
10:56Billy Jo's the beautiful daughter
10:58that's interested in doctors.
11:00Becoming one.
11:02Good for her.
11:03Most beautiful girls these days just seem to be interested
11:06in going to Hollywood and becoming actresses.
11:08Isn't it the truth?
11:10But I'm sure that you'll encourage Billy
11:13to go to medical school.
11:15Well, if she hopes to become a doctor,
11:17I can recommend it highly.
11:26D reconnection
11:30E reconnection
11:43C'mon, Uncle Joe. Hop a little higher.
11:46He's a great weightlifter.
11:48Take it easy, kids. There's more of me to hop.
11:51I think I better go out in the kitchen
11:53and take on some of that high-protein,
11:55like your ma's lemon meringue pie.
12:03All right for you to rest, hotel doctor.
12:06Oh, what happened to Mrs. Bradley?
12:09Oh, she had to rush some supplies up to the hotel.
12:11Except for me and Charlie to bring you along in a little bit.
12:14Oh, that won't be necessary. I can find my own way.
12:16Kate wants me and Charlie to hold you up a little.
12:20Hold me up?
12:21Climbing the path to the hotel.
12:23It gets a little slippery this time of year.
12:25Is that what she meant?
12:27Yeah, yeah.
12:31Stop the dancing. Quick, stop the dancing.
12:33Have some respect for the sick.
12:35Who's sick?
12:36Uncle Joe, where is he?
12:37In the kitchen loading up on pie.
12:39Well, everybody sit down and look worried
12:41because the doctor's coming to examine Uncle Joe.
12:43But mom, he was just...
12:44And you, Billy Joe, you look worried but beautiful.
12:47What gives?
12:48I don't know. It sounds like it's gonna be dull, Phil.
12:51Hey, Billy, let's cut out, huh?
12:53I'm with you.
12:58Uncle Joe, I gotta ask you a quick, serious question.
13:04Anybody that can make pie this good can ask me anything. Shoot.
13:07If you and Billy Joe ran out of money and got stranded in Hollywood,
13:11could you support her by acting?
13:13Easy. I got acting in my blood.
13:15That's where Billy Joe gets it.
13:17Well, can I be sure about it? Could I give you a test?
13:20Of course. Throw me a scene from Shakespeare, I'll eat it up.
13:24Which is more than I'm getting to do with this piece of pie.
13:26Well, never mind Shakespeare. I got a better test.
13:30Can you convince a young city doctor that you're really sick?
13:35Easy as pie.
13:37I'll take that back. Pie ain't so easy around here.
13:40You hurry up the back stairs and hop into bed.
13:43Please, Kate, don't ask me to hop. I'm all hopped out.
13:46Billy!
13:47Can I take my piece of pie with me?
13:48You do a convincing job on that, doctor, and I'll serve you a whole pie in bed.
13:53Look out, Spencer Tracy. Here comes acting Joe Carson.
14:05This is a puzzling case.
14:07How long have these dizzy spells been occurring?
14:09A year.
14:11How long?
14:12A year and a week, exactly.
14:14That's a long time.
14:16Why haven't you told Dr. DePue about this?
14:18Well, I haven't really noticed the dizzy spells on account of the fierce stabbing pain in my arm.
14:27Where does the pain seem to be?
14:29Mostly on the inside.
14:31You take any medication for the pain?
14:33No, I only notice it when my knee stops throbbing.
14:36Your knee bothers you, too?
14:38Oh, terrible. It's almost as bad as my back.
14:42You also have a bad back.
14:44I'm just one big mass of misery.
14:48You certainly are. Arm, knee, back, dizzy spells.
14:52How do you ever get any work done?
14:55Grit. Sheer grit.
14:58Dr. Harris, I'll go get my daughter, Billy Jo, so you two can have your consultation.
15:03Well, I'm afraid I'm going to have to give your uncle quite a thorough examination.
15:06Perhaps you'd better wait downstairs until later.
15:09Oh, all right.
15:11We'll be anxious to talk to you, my daughter, Billy and me.
15:16Uncle Jo, remember how to act.
15:22He gets out of hand sometimes.
15:25Don't worry about me, Kate. Just have that pie ready.
15:30I don't believe we should eat any pie.
15:32Well, I wasn't planning on sharing it with you, Doc.
15:35What I meant was you're going to have to start losing some weight.
15:38Kate, where from?
15:41It's all solid muscle.
15:44Wide.
15:46Stick out your tongue. Further.
15:49A little further.
15:51That's all the tongue I got, Doc.
15:53And they're on back of strobes.
16:02Charlie, maybe you better stop hopping. It's kind of shaking me upstairs.
16:06I'm real glad to have an excuse to stop.
16:09Where's Billy Jo?
16:10Oh, she and Junior went back to the lake.
16:12Oh, no. She's got to be here when Dr. Harris comes down.
16:15I'll get her back for you, Kate.
16:17Well, see if you can get her back without Junior.
16:19Okay. Come on, Kate. Do the Hooterville Hop with us kids.
16:22Sure, Mom. You're coming to the high school dance.
16:24Oh, we'll be so proud of you, Mom. You'll be the only mother who knows the hop.
16:28Well, all right, but let's hop quiet.
16:37Dr. Harris!
16:39I'm glad to see you're not worried about your uncle. I'll be running along.
16:42Oh, but I am worried. Awful worried. We're all worried.
16:45Well, dancing's a good way to relieve tension.
16:47Oh, no, girl. We weren't dancing.
16:49No? What do you call it?
16:51The Hooterville Hop. This young fella started it.
16:54It's spreading like wildfire. It's a terrible disease.
16:58Disease?
16:59It makes your foot muscles twitch. You hop a lot.
17:02I think you'd better quarantine the hotel.
17:11Mrs. Bradley, I'd love to meet your daughter,
17:13but I have a lot of paperwork waiting for me at the office.
17:15Well, Doctor, she'll be back in just a second.
17:17I've got everybody out looking for her,
17:19and I do so want you to help her pick out the medical school she should go to.
17:23Well, why don't you let me know when you get back?
17:25I'm afraid I can't. I've got a lot of paperwork waiting for me at the office.
17:29I'd love to help her pick out the medical school she should go to.
17:32Well, why don't we make it next time?
17:34Next time? It might be too late.
17:36Or she'll be running off to Hollywood. Do you like some tea?
17:39No, thank you. I've really got to get back to Hooterville.
17:42Well, we've looked everywhere for Billy Jo, Mom.
17:45There's no sign of her yet.
17:47Suppose we do make it next time.
17:49Oh, Betty Jo, you show the doctor how your poison ivy has spread.
17:54Spread? Where? It's practically gone.
17:57Take a quick look at her, Doctor.
18:00Show the doctor your leg, dear.
18:02All right, Mrs. Bradley, if it'll make you feel better.
18:05Oh, Mother, for heaven's sake.
18:10Hmm?
18:12Well, I'm afraid I'm too late, Mrs. Bradley.
18:15You mean it's serious? No, it's gone.
18:17Well, how about the other leg?
18:19Very pretty. They make a nice pair.
18:22Doctor, I hate to hold you up like this, but as long as you're here,
18:25could you take a look at my foot?
18:27I've had this terrible pain.
18:30You have? Yes, I have.
18:33And you run along about your business, and you know what that is.
18:38All right. What seems to be the trouble?
18:40Well, I don't rightly know, Doctor. The pain seems to come and go.
18:44Well, if you'll take off your shoe, we'll see what we can find.
18:47Oh, thank you, Doctor.
18:49Where does it seem to hurt?
18:51On the bottom, in the middle.
18:54Does this hurt?
18:56It tickles. Stop it.
18:59It tickles and it hurts is what it does.
19:03Well, it didn't seem to hurt you when you were jumping up and down
19:06and hopping a few minutes ago.
19:08Well, it doesn't hurt when I hop. It's just when I walk.
19:11And then I limp all over the place.
19:13Well, you're doing the right thing for it, just what I'd do.
19:16Oh, really? Yes, if I had a sore foot, I think I'd limp, too.
19:20Don't you want me to do anything for it but limp?
19:23Well, you can soak it in some hot water and some Epsom salts
19:26and that should take care of the trouble.
19:28Anything else?
19:30Oh, let me see now.
19:32Well, if you think of anything else, Mrs. Bradley,
19:34you just drop by the office.
19:36Goodbye.
19:37I think I've got something in my eye.
19:41All right, Mrs. Bradley, let me take a look.
19:46Well, look who's here.
19:48My daughter, Billy Jo the doctor.
19:50What?
19:51Uh, my daughter, Billy Jo the doctor.
19:54Dr. Clayton Harris.
19:56How do you do, doctor? How do you do?
19:58Somebody sick?
19:59Your Uncle Joe again.
20:00Again?
20:01It's getting to be a terrible problem, isn't it?
20:04Now, Billy Jo, I know you're anxious to get upstairs
20:06and see your poor sick uncle.
20:08And Dr. Harris will go with you.
20:10And you can watch while he takes Uncle Joe's pulse
20:13and temperature and blood pressure and things like that.
20:16I've done all that.
20:17But not for Billy Jo.
20:19She's never seen a real doctor
20:21make a real examination on a real patient.
20:24That's the real truth.
20:26Well, I suppose there are a couple of other tests I could run.
20:29Oh, wonderful.
20:31If there ain't nothing serious wrong with me,
20:33why are you back up here getting ready to do all these things?
20:36Just routine.
20:37Uh, besides, this young lady wanted to see you.
20:40What for? Last look, is that it?
20:42Oh, Uncle Joe, calm down.
20:43How do you feel?
20:44Terrible. Hate. Hate, I'm sinking.
20:47I want the rest of them up here to tell me goodbye.
20:49Doc, level with me.
20:50How much time have I got?
20:52Now you're getting yourself all worked up over nothing.
20:55Miss Bradley, this will be a good illustration
20:58of how nervous tension can elevate blood pressure.
21:01When I took his pressure before, it was normal.
21:04Now we'll see to what extent his anxiety
21:06has increased the pressure.
21:07Isn't this thrilling?
21:09Fine, niece.
21:10I'm dying and you're thrilled.
21:13Doctor, could Billy please do that?
21:16Certainly.
21:17Mom, squeeze the bulb, just like the doctor.
21:21Get the feel of it, you might like it.
21:26Well, that proves I'm a goner.
21:28Letting amateurs practice on me.
21:31Now observe.
21:32This higher reading is the systolic pressure.
21:37And this is the diastolic.
21:39And I was right, it is relatively elevated.
21:41Kate, get me a pencil and paper.
21:43I want to dictate my last will and testament.
21:47Now we'll try a hemoglobin determination.
21:49Billy Joe, isn't this exciting?
21:52Well, sort of.
21:53Go ahead, doctor, you're doing just fine.
21:55First we'll extract a little blood.
21:57From who?
21:58From you.
21:59Now this is pure alcohol.
22:00Great, I can use a slug.
22:04Now if you'll moisten some cotton with the alcohol
22:07and cleanse the end of his middle finger.
22:11Oh!
22:14Doctor, look.
22:15Look, she's a natural born finger cleanser.
22:19I'm going to go get her sister.
22:20They've just got to see the way this girl has taken the medicine.
22:29Now hold on, doctor.
22:30Be careful of that harpoon.
22:32Ow!
22:34There, that didn't hurt us.
22:36Then how come one of us yelled ow?
22:39Now, if you'll hold this hemoglobinometer.
22:45We'll collect some blood between these sterile glass slides
22:49and insert them in the hemoglobinometer.
22:52Miss Bradley?
22:53Miss Bradley?
22:57Hurry up, girls.
22:58I want you to see your sister, the doctor, in action.
23:00Where is she?
23:01She's right there on the floor.
23:02On the floor?
23:04What happened, doctor?
23:06She fainted at the first sight of blood.
23:08Oh, no.
23:09Wake up, doc.
23:11Snap out of it, Willie.
23:12You're wanted in surgery.
23:14Oh, stop teasing her.
23:16Come on, wake up, Billy.
23:18Oh.
23:20I wonder if Dr. Schweitzer's mother had this trouble.
23:37How can you dance down here when my life's heaven away?
23:42Doc, please give me back that blood.
23:45I need it.
23:50Oh, Uncle Drew, I was just going to bring your pie up to you.
23:53I can't eat pie.
23:55I'm a surgeon.
23:56I can't eat pie.
23:57I'm a surgeon.
23:58I'm a surgeon.
23:59I'm a surgeon.
24:00I'm a surgeon.
24:01I'm a surgeon.
24:02I'm a surgeon.
24:03I'm a surgeon.
24:04I'm a surgeon.
24:05I'm a death store.
24:08Well, I'll just take it back.
24:10Just a minute.
24:11I need strength.
24:12Maybe I can force down a bite or two.
24:15Might get me through the night so I can see another sunrise.
24:21How's she doing, doctor?
24:22Fine.
24:23She hasn't fainted once.
24:24You sure have picked up the hood of a lot.
24:27Thanks.
24:28It's the greatest disease I ever danced.
24:30I have family and friends I've got.
24:32Not one of them cares that I'm passing on.
24:43I wonder if there's any more pie in the kitchen.
24:50Wow.
24:51Wow.
25:02Wow.
25:03Wow.
25:04Wow.
25:05Wow.
25:06Wow.
25:07Wow.
25:08Wow.
25:09Wow.
25:10Wow.
25:11Wow.
25:12Wow.
25:13Wow.
25:14Wow.
25:15Wow.
25:16Wow.
25:17Wow.
25:18Wow.
25:19Wow.
25:20Wow.
25:21Wow.
25:22Wow.
25:23Wow.
25:24Wow.
25:25Wow.
25:26Wow.
25:27Wow.
25:28Wow.
25:29Wow.
25:30Wow.
25:31This has been a Filmways presentation.