How not to bake a loch ness monster cake
Category
🦄
CreativityTranscript
00:00 I'm gonna go for this.
00:02 Three looks silly.
00:04 Hey!
00:06 What's going on?
00:08 Today.
00:10 Cooking.
00:12 Shit.
00:14 We had
00:16 a whole thing of eggs in here today.
00:18 And now, there is two left
00:20 after this.
00:22 We need three.
00:24 So we just put them in there, right?
00:26 And they crack themselves?
00:28 No, it's good.
00:30 You got no jawline.
00:36 Stop shaking it.
00:40 I'm scrambling it.
00:42 You're avoiding it. That's what you're doing.
00:44 And a couple more times.
00:48 Is this a cup, right?
00:50 A cup.
00:52 Where's the mug?
00:54 I have the mug.
00:56 Grease butthole.
00:58 We need a pan.
01:00 We need a pan?
01:02 Why do we need a pan?
01:04 I was just gonna put it in there.
01:08 That's a pan you got.
01:12 I have a potato.
01:14 Wait, there's pans up there.
01:16 Where? Top shelf.
01:18 No, in the top shelf of the corner.
01:20 Get it.
01:22 I can't make it.
01:24 I'm gonna put it in the pan.
01:26 Damn it, damn it. Don't scare me.
01:36 Don't scare me.
01:40 I was laughing and I didn't want to hold it.
01:46 This is what you do.
01:48 I poured it in there.
01:50 You can, yeah.
01:52 I mean, it's gonna rise.
01:54 If it's gonna overflow?
01:56 We don't want no overflow.
01:58 I mean, I'm not really sure.
02:00 Well, how much is it supposed to do?
02:02 What do you mean?
02:04 How much is it supposed to make?
02:06 I think.
02:08 From what they decided.
02:10 You know how much I think.
02:16 I think I should wash my hands.
02:18 I should probably get new water.
02:20 Why?
02:22 Because I haven't washed my hands yet.
02:24 You're gonna bake it.
02:26 I haven't washed my hands in like a few days.
02:28 I'm just kidding.
02:30 I was...
02:32 I don't know what's on my hands right now.
02:36 At this moment.
02:38 That's a good idea.
02:40 We also might want to wash the pan because I just put the eggs that were in the water that my hands were stuck in.
02:42 It's fine, we're gonna bake it.
02:44 True.
02:46 Then does it really matter?
02:48 I don't know.
02:50 You're so far behind.
02:52 You haven't done anything yet.
02:54 You get this, Crisco.
02:56 Crisco?
02:58 What's Crisco?
03:00 You just use pan.
03:02 You can do that too.
03:04 That's cracking eggs.
03:06 You think I can do that?
03:10 Yeah, don't.
03:12 That's how you get egg shells in.
03:14 Do you know how to get egg shells out?
03:16 With the egg shell.
03:18 No, you wet the tip of your finger and it sticks to your finger.
03:20 Don't tell me.
03:22 I didn't do much at all.
03:24 Ow.
03:26 It's...
03:28 I need to wash my hands again because I touched eggs.
03:32 Nicole, I'm gonna put your hands in.
03:34 I feel like this is gonna be too much of it in that other thing.
03:42 It's gonna be fine.
03:44 I feel like it's not.
03:46 I feel like it's really not.
03:48 Well, purple is kind of cool. We can do pink.
03:54 What about pink and purple?
03:56 What about make red?
04:02 What will we make?
04:04 We are the champions.
04:06 My friends.
04:08 I don't know how much to put in here.
04:10 Give me something I can scrape the bowl.
04:12 Does it taste good?
04:14 Does it taste good yet?
04:16 You need to hold the bowl while I scrape it.
04:20 I can't.
04:22 You're the worst scraper ever.
04:24 You're the worst bowl holder ever.
04:26 You go like that.
04:28 It's so wrinkly.
04:30 I don't want a wrinkly monster.
04:32 It's gonna bake.
04:34 It's gonna rise when it bakes.
04:36 It's not gonna rise.
04:38 It's gonna rise.
04:40 It's really pretty high when it bakes.
04:42 Can I lick it now?
04:44 Does it taste good?
04:46 No, it tastes good.
04:48 We're gonna get the vanilla.
04:50 I want it.
04:52 What's wrong now?
04:54 I have to pee still.
04:56 I'm not gonna pee though.
04:58 I'm training myself to not have to pee.
05:00 I just don't go.
05:06 Oh gosh.
05:08 This is a disaster.
05:10 This is a disaster.
05:12 That was a mistake.
05:14 I figured it out.
05:16 Where did this go?
05:18 I didn't even know I had it.
05:20 Do we do dishes as we go?
05:24 Or do we just leave it here forever?
05:26 Let me live my life.
05:32 We got some Rice Krispie Treats over here.
05:34 We don't got no Rice Krispie Treats over here.
05:36 We got some Rice Krispie Treats.
05:38 We got marmalade and cake.
05:42 We gonna make...
05:44 What are we gonna make?
05:46 We can make a momster.
05:48 A momster?
05:50 That could be a TV show.
05:52 A momster.
05:54 Living with my momster.
05:56 They look like mozzarella balls.
06:02 Mozzarella balls.
06:04 Is this a ball something?
06:06 I'm just kidding.
06:08 No.
06:10 No more clothes.
06:12 No.
06:16 I have a ball something.
06:18 I'll see you then.
06:20 I'll play soccer.
06:24 Okay.
06:26 Good save.
06:30 Okay.
06:32 Excuse me.
06:34 I'm not playing.
06:38 Oh.
06:40 Switch.
06:42 You're being sassy.
06:46 Hey.
06:48 I'm doing a job.
06:58 Big.
07:00 Oh god.
07:06 Oh lord.
07:08 Use your muscles.
07:14 My big muscles.
07:18 Stop yelling.
07:20 Tell me what I'm gonna do again.
07:22 Don't tell me.
07:26 What to do.
07:28 Do wax paper.
07:30 No. I won't do it.
07:32 Just don't do wax paper.
07:34 Okay.
07:36 Oh my god. I just got wax paper.
07:40 It's hot.
07:44 My hand is a bee.
07:48 Ow.
07:52 It's hot.
07:54 My hand is a bee so bad.
07:56 No.
07:58 I won't.
08:00 Boobs are getting in my way.
08:02 No. It's hot.
08:08 Bitch.
08:10 I wanna do the head.
08:16 Oh.
08:18 We should put butter on our face.
08:20 Pam.
08:22 No. Get off.
08:24 Give me your hand.
08:26 Why do you think that only works for Pam?
08:30 No it doesn't.
08:32 We're gonna find out.
08:34 I need you to spray my other hand.
08:38 Actually no you don't.
08:40 I'm so smart.
08:48 How big should the head be?
08:50 I mean you don't want to make it non-proportional to the body.
08:52 Well I don't know how big the body should be.
08:54 Is it a boy or a girl?
08:56 Can I make a penis?
09:02 No.
09:04 I don't want a penis on it.
09:06 Can you put googly eyes on it?
09:08 Can you get that off?
09:10 What does Nessie look like?
09:12 No one's ever seen him.
09:14 That's a really good question, Nicole.
09:18 You work on the face.
09:20 I'll make the body.
09:22 Work this piece of shit.
09:24 How do we...
09:26 That's like a worm.
09:32 I need something to put under here.
09:34 What is that?
09:36 Will you relax?
09:38 It's done!
09:44 It's gonna have legs.
09:46 No.
09:48 No, it's gonna be a scale.
09:50 Let me do me.
09:54 I'm an artist.
09:56 I'm an artist.
09:58 I'm a woman artist now.
10:00 Working on Nessie's head.
10:02 You got my bottom.
10:04 There it is.
10:12 Nicole, this is too warm.
10:14 You're too warm.
10:16 What? This is falling.
10:18 Because I haven't touched it in a while.
10:20 That's what I'm saying.
10:22 Can we stick it in the freezer?
10:24 No. I need to place this...
10:26 in here.
10:28 Like so.
10:30 If I eat this too thick, I'm gonna be really upset.
10:34 I hope we don't need any more because I ate it all.
10:42 Give it to Nicole.
10:44 There's only a little bit.
10:46 And it's not just a worm.
10:48 It looks like a worm.
10:50 It has scales.
10:52 Oh, wait a minute.
10:54 What?
10:56 I think that's longer than it is.
10:58 So wrap it like the butt around the bottom of the thing.
11:00 Wrap your butt around the bottom of something.
11:02 In a minute.
11:06 Can we name him?
11:08 I have to name everything.
11:10 What are you gonna name him?
11:12 I don't know.
11:14 How about...
11:16 Harrison?
11:18 Harrison?
11:20 No.
11:22 Do you know a Harrison?
11:24 No.
11:26 Oh, I do. He's a dream.
11:28 Oh, Harrison, that friend of mine,
11:30 passed out on me in the middle of sheets.
11:32 Twice.
11:34 Twice.
11:36 I was like, "Ugh."
11:38 Maybe three times my size.
11:40 And I was like, "Um, I can't catch you."
11:42 And then the cops had the audacity
11:44 to ask us if we were drunk and/or high.
11:46 Did not sign up for this.
11:48 And then everyone just like
11:50 looked at me while I was like struggling to hold them up
11:52 and I was like, "Excuse me, somebody do something."
11:54 Did you get them to help?
11:56 "Somebody do something."
11:58 Quick!
12:00 Oh, no.
12:02 Tired of being disrespected in this house.
12:04 No one appreciates what I do.
12:06 I do a lot.
12:08 I really do.
12:10 I may not be in school right now,
12:12 and I may not have a job.
12:14 I'm like...
12:16 I do a damn lot.
12:20 I might just drive around
12:22 randomly and waste gas.
12:24 Waste gas?
12:26 Can we put like,
12:28 yellow ones on his teeth?
12:30 No.
12:32 Because he doesn't have a neck or anything.
12:34 He doesn't have teeth.
12:36 Like a dove.
12:38 Not funny. People with no neck,
12:40 but they got teeth.
12:42 Do they, though?
12:44 Kiss a meal.
12:46 It's making me angry just looking at this.
12:52 I think he's cute.
12:54 I just want to eat it.
12:58 Damn it.
13:00 He was here with the ugly stick.
13:02 He was here with the ugly stick.
13:04 Hit pretty hard with the ugly stick.
13:06 I'm right here.
13:08 Right on the nose.
13:10 Oh.
13:12 Yep.
13:14 Yep, that's ugly.
13:16 Yep.
13:18 What's that gonna do?
13:20 Bring the other thing over here.
13:22 No.
13:26 But, nasty hands.
13:30 You're gonna break it.
13:32 You're gonna ruin it all.
13:34 Wait, we need to get this part on camera.
13:36 We get anything.
13:38 I just know.
13:40 Wait.
13:42 We have to move it up.
13:44 No, his hands are gonna fall.
13:46 I can't.
13:48 Oh no.
13:50 We misjudged the
13:52 size of this big time.
13:54 Oh, oh, oh no.
13:56 Oh my goodness.
13:58 Oh look, it's breaking.
14:00 Oh my god, the cake is breaking.
14:02 You know what?
14:04 I just want to eat the cake.
14:06 No, it looks good.
14:08 This is his home.
14:10 It's like he's sitting on a cracked rack.
14:12 You know, or something.
14:14 Something like that.
14:16 Stop eating the cake.
14:18 Well, the cake is breaking in half.
14:26 Take a bite of it.
14:28 Oh, the scaleys.
14:30 Oh, his head.
14:32 Oh, I just poked his eye out.
14:34 I don't know if it's filled.
14:38 No, there's still toothpicks in this somewhere.
14:40 This cake is not that moist.
14:44 I was expecting more moistness.
14:48 Oh, there's the toothpick.
14:52 There's a little bit of lens in there.
14:54 So you're just gonna leave it like this?
14:56 (coughing)