Category
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CreativityTranscript
00:00 Hi, my name's Marta. For Comic Relief 2007, I've decided to have my head shaved.
00:07 So, let's get the show on the road.
00:11 Right, before I start, are you sure?
00:14 Yes.
00:15 Right, can I start? I ain't stopping.
00:17 Okay.
00:18 Okay?
00:19 Yeah, go.
00:20 [growls]
00:22 If it hurts, just let me know, yeah?
00:24 Yeah.
00:27 Wow, that actually feels really nice.
00:30 It does give it a shaved-off scalp line.
00:32 Yeah, like head shaved.
00:34 Seems to fit round your brain quite well.
00:36 [laughs]
00:37 Not much of a brain, so...
00:39 You've got like a servo, I remember a servo like that, of, um, Flake 7.
00:43 You don't remember it after this.
00:46 Yeah, yeah, yeah.
00:47 Looks like a servo.
00:48 G.I.J.
00:52 Yeah, it is kind of cool.
00:53 Is it?
00:54 It is.
00:56 [laughs]
00:57 See, the reason why it was...
01:02 Wow.
01:03 The reason why it was tugging on you, Paul, is you were doing it yourself.
01:07 No, I do it. I just obviously...
01:09 Oh, you're confident?
01:10 Yeah.
01:11 [laughs]
01:12 Oh, that feels wonderful.
01:18 You're quite serious, aren't you?
01:20 Yeah.
01:21 Oh, wow.
01:22 No washing your hair, if you think...
01:24 Washing your hair is going to be cool.
01:26 Do you know what soap you need?
01:27 No.
01:28 Size of a 5-inch piece.
01:29 Maybe a bit bigger, 10p.
01:31 20p. 20p should be enough.
01:33 It'll, uh, wash so easily.
01:36 Not nearly short enough.
01:44 [laughs]
01:45 Make you look like a Pathfinder, you know, in the American Armed Forces.
01:52 God, there's three loads coming off.
01:55 Well, you'll touch something in bed, Paul, and you won't know whether it's Marta's head or half her arse.
02:01 All I can say is, um, if you ever take up snorkeling, Paul, you've got a great backbone.
02:08 You'll, uh...
02:10 Take up snorkeling?
02:11 Yeah, matches.
02:12 [laughs]
02:13 [laughs]
02:14 What are you doing? What are you doing?
02:27 I don't need your hair, actually.
02:28 That's California.
02:29 Sorry.
02:30 There's just still loads of hair coming off.
02:33 Unbelievable.
02:35 What?
02:41 Nothing.
02:42 Where did all this hair come from?
02:44 You got that?
02:48 What?
02:49 People might just call it a passing on the head as well.
02:52 Passing what off?
02:53 Passing on the head.
02:55 I haven't heard anything as well as yet.
02:57 If anyone asks you, just tell them straight away, "No, I'm not on chemo."
03:01 Okay.
03:02 I'm going to have to put a sign up on my door saying, "Stop stroking the animal."
03:07 [buzzing]
03:09 I'm afraid to throw the key out.
03:14 "No, I'm not on chemo."
03:16 Is that ear giving you a bit of a problem?
03:20 It's just the hair around it that's got to be scratched.
03:23 You've got hair like mine on the back of your neck that grows up.
03:26 Ow, ow, ow. You're scratching me.
03:29 Yeah, because you've got the need to fletch over.
03:32 Paul can do that better.
03:33 Okay.
03:34 [buzzing]
03:36 Right, so you're almost done.
03:45 Head down, turn on your side.
03:47 [buzzing]
03:49 [buzzing]
03:51 You're not going to sleep, is that?
04:16 You said spin round first.
04:18 And then give a speech.
04:20 Right, thank you very much. I hope you enjoyed the show.
04:25 And I'll be coming round to collect money in the next couple of weeks, so please be ready.
04:30 And if you don't, what happens if no one gives you the money?
04:35 If no one gives me the money, I'll send Stuart round to beat them up.
04:38 [silence]
04:41 [silence]
04:43 [silence]
04:45 [BLANK_AUDIO]