• last year
WHEN Aaron, 29, from Dublin, Ireland was interning in New York and was swiping on a dating app, he had no idea that the hook-up he was looking for would eventually become his husband - who is 37-years his senior. Michael, 66, had just come out of a 17-year relationship when he was matched with Aaron. They met in the summer of 2017 when Aaron was 23 and Michael was 61 and had a whirlwind romance, although they didn’t want to admit how much they liked each other. Unfortunately, it took another 2.5 years to see each other again when Aaron invited Michael to Dublin. They became inseparable, and as the pandemic hit Michael knew there was just one place he needed to be. He tried to get a flight for five days, and eventually managed it; it was thanks to lockdown they both got to spend quality time together and in May 2020 they got engaged. Since being married, the couple started an online blog and podcast (QueerDaze) where they’ve received both support and negative comments. Aaron explained: "We blog geared towards age gap relationships, so obviously, you get some, negative feedback referring to, 'daddy issues'". Other comments claim he is a "gold digger" and that "daddy pays [the] bills". Aaron admitted that it can be "a little annoying sometimes, I'm authentically into older men." Adding: "The only thing that bothers me is that I work really hard. I'm lucky to be in a good job and I'm lucky to be able to make good money. But the thing is, I realise that I could be able to say earning a million salary a year, people will still comment gold digger." In this episode of Love Don't Judge Aaron's long-time best friend Luke comes over for a showdown to discuss his initial doubts about the relationship. "One thing you should know about Aaron is that he likes to play the field. So when he said that they're monogamous, I just thought absolute b*******.", he said. "I was worried that he was going to hurt himself or Mike. You hear a lot of people saying that he's working hard to get his name in the will."

Category

😹
Fun
Transcript
00:00 This is 29-year-old Aaron. He fell in love with 66-year-old Michael.
00:05 Aaron has a self-confessed type when it comes to dating.
00:08 Everyone knows that I am into older men.
00:11 This has led to a high level of scepticism surrounding their marriage.
00:15 People will be like, "Oh, he's still a gold digger."
00:17 From, I think, TikTok.
00:18 You know, your daddy issues.
00:20 Today, Aaron's friend is sharing his doubts about their relationship.
00:23 One thing you should know about Aaron is that he likes to play the field.
00:29 So when he said that they're monogamous, I just thought, "Absolute bulls***."
00:34 And you hear a lot of people saying, "Oh, he's working hard to get his name in the will."
00:39 I'm Aaron. This is my husband, Michael.
00:44 And we have a 37-year age gap in our relationship.
00:48 I am 29 years old.
00:49 And I'm 66 years old.
00:52 So we met in New York. I was actually working over on an internship.
00:56 And I was lucky enough to run into this guy.
00:59 Run into?
01:00 Well, to put it bluntly, you know, we messaged each other on Grindr.
01:04 Initially, it was just a plan. It was meant to be a hookup.
01:07 But one thing led to another, and, you know...
01:09 Now we're married.
01:10 Now we're married.
01:11 I was very wary about his age.
01:14 But, you know, he's talked to me on so many qualities and traits that I look for.
01:18 He's just, like, so hot. Like, easy on the eye, so to say.
01:22 So I'm kind of, like, living in dreamland the whole time here.
01:25 [laughter]
01:26 You know?
01:27 We texted each other back and forth for about two and a half years.
01:33 He asked me to come to Ireland. It was before the pandemic.
01:37 And we had a great time.
01:40 And we made plans to see each other again.
01:43 And, you know, things were just getting worse. We were closing up.
01:46 And I just decided, you know, if anything happened, there's only one place I want to be.
01:50 And that was, you know, Aaron.
01:52 After spending two months in a room with each other, ten hours a day,
01:57 I asked him to get married.
01:59 So this is our wedding album.
02:02 I love this.
02:03 Yeah, it's a very good photo.
02:04 I remember being in bed with Mike, and when he proposed,
02:10 honestly, I was lost for words because it was the furthest thing from my mind.
02:14 Surprisingly, it was the easiest decision of my life.
02:18 My relationship history is I tried with girls.
02:21 When I was younger, faking to be straight, I was always into older men.
02:25 I'm physically attracted to older men.
02:27 So that was kind of when it became official. People were like, "Right, he is gay."
02:30 I can't basically get married to an older gay man and not be gay.
02:35 So that's when I came out.
02:36 I suppose the question that would come to people's minds straight away would be like,
02:41 "Oh, this must be your son."
02:42 They'd be like, "Oh, this must be your son."
02:44 "Oh, no, that's my husband."
02:45 There's a gym in the building we work out in downstairs.
02:48 I think we were doing push-ups or something.
02:51 So occasionally, we talk to people, and this guy asked.
02:56 I don't know how he started.
02:57 I think he came over admiring your physique.
02:59 I mean, who wouldn't?
03:01 I would do the same.
03:02 But I think then he was asking, "Oh, is this your son?"
03:05 Yeah.
03:06 And I was there like, "Oh!"
03:08 If you kind of got offended by these situations,
03:11 I mean, look, I don't think people are purposely like, "Oh, they must be father and son."
03:14 I think it's just an assumption, which is a fair assumption
03:17 because it's not your typical relationship by looking in anyway.
03:22 We blog kind of geared towards age gap relationships,
03:26 so obviously, we get some negative feedback.
03:29 Like referring to your daddy issues, your gold digger,
03:33 which can be a little annoying sometimes.
03:35 Right, so here is two from TikTok.
03:40 You know, "Daddy pays my bills."
03:42 And then other comments like, "How much is in the bank?"
03:45 It's kind of funny being called a gold digger
03:47 because, like, honestly, first of all, like, I didn't choose to be gay.
03:51 I didn't want to make life harder on myself.
03:53 Then I wouldn't go one step further and, like, choose to be into older guys.
03:57 There's kind of assumptions about age gap relationships,
04:00 but I can't do anything about that.
04:02 I'm authentically into older men.
04:05 The only thing that bothers me about it is that I work really hard
04:09 and I'm lucky to be in a good job and I'm lucky to be able to make good money.
04:13 But the thing is, I realize that I could be, to say, earning a million salary a year.
04:18 People will still comment and say, "Oh, gold digger, I could be making more money than Michael."
04:21 It's like, it just discredits my life a little bit.
04:24 The thought that somebody is going to like you or be attracted to you for your money
04:31 is just kind of foreign to me.
04:33 They're hostile people and they've been hurt by somebody.
04:35 It's sad. They're just bitter, sad people.
04:37 But, look, honestly, it's more positively supportive rather than negative,
04:42 which is what makes us keep continuing to do it.
04:45 If it wasn't positive feedback, we wouldn't do it.
04:48 So our friend Luke is going to call over.
04:50 So Luke is one of my best mates.
04:52 We've chatted about the relationship, but there's parts we haven't,
04:55 because, you know, I've never said to Luke, like, you know,
04:59 "I want your real thoughts here."
05:02 One thing you should know about Aaron is that he likes to play the field.
05:11 One of the weird affinities that we had that kind of brought us together
05:15 is that we were young twinks on the scene, kind of Bonnie and Clyde or Talman and Louise.
05:23 When I very first found out about Aaron and Michael,
05:25 I didn't think much of it other than, like, another one of Aaron's f***ing escapades.
05:31 Aaron sends over the pictures of Mike, and I was like, "Oh, right, very good.
05:36 He looks rich."
05:38 You definitely come across people that, like, will say Aaron's got daddy issues.
05:44 "Oh, he's working hard to get his name in the will."
05:46 It was when they, like, emerged out of a cocoon after one of our major lockdowns
05:51 and announced over, like, Facebook Messenger,
05:56 along with a photo of engagement rings, only four months into their relationship.
06:01 Yeah, I had some reservations that somebody or both of them were going to get really hurt in a few months' time.
06:07 - Huh? - Hi.
06:09 - How are you? - Good to see you.
06:11 - Go, go. - Where's Mikey?
06:14 - He's just inside. - Hey, Mikey.
06:16 - Oh, how are you doing, Luke? - How are you?
06:19 - I'm good. - Come on.
06:21 I never asked you, so what was, like, going through your head, I suppose?
06:25 I was like, "God, one or both of them is going to get really hurt."
06:29 - (LAUGHS) - Yeah.
06:31 You've got this, like, guy who's (BLEEP)--
06:33 like, he's already got his life set up for himself in Manhattan.
06:37 There's, like, supposedly just dropping everything to come over to Dublin
06:42 to Aaron, who, like, literally, like, can't go a morning without, like,
06:47 - getting the leg over with somebody else. - (LAUGHTER)
06:50 I mean, surprised myself to a certain degree, but, I mean, to be honest,
06:55 I also just never felt like this about someone as well.
06:57 Well, first of all, I can't believe when you saw us together,
07:00 you didn't think it was real? I mean, you didn't think you couldn't tell
07:03 - how happy we were? - A lot of people are cynical.
07:06 Like, a lot of people think that Aaron's gold-digging.
07:11 Some people just like to pass judgment.
07:13 First question I get from all the people I meet at, "Are you guys monogamous?"
07:17 I remember, like, when you were having chats about it,
07:21 and you were, like, seemed pretty adamant about monogamy,
07:24 I was like, "Oh, God, here we go. This is the start of a big drama.
07:30 "Mike doesn't know what's coming."
07:33 And, again, I hate s***. He's proven me wrong, like...
07:36 I'm the best s*** person in this world. There's nobody better.
07:41 Why would I ever want to sleep with anybody else?
07:46 Has your scepticism disappeared yet?
07:49 No matter which way you look at it, you guys are an odd couple.
07:53 But you really, really work.
07:55 And it's great that my friend gets to be a better person
08:01 because of your existence.
08:03 Yeah, and I've gained a cute little friend as well.
08:08 What I love most about Mike, love his personality.
08:11 He's just my, like, crazy little husband that, like, has all his little quirks.
08:15 You've made me, like, just so comfortable in my own skin.
08:18 Waking up to him makes me better because I'm so happy every day.
08:22 [ding]
08:24 [silence]
08:27 [silence]
08:29 [silence]
08:31 [BLANK_AUDIO]

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