Coronation Street 24th June 2023-n
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TVTranscript
00:00 [MUSIC PLAYING]
00:03 You, um, you sure you don't want me to cancel things
00:26 and come with you today?
00:29 Volunteering to hang out in the M&E consultants room?
00:31 What are you trying to get out of?
00:33 Yeah, well, you know, it's nothing like that.
00:36 Oh, maybe just a little.
00:39 What could be possibly worse than my hospital, then?
00:43 A meeting about climate change and sustainability
00:46 in the church.
00:48 I can postpone it.
00:49 No, it's all right.
00:51 Don't have anything new to tell me.
00:53 Well, it's not about that, though, is it?
00:55 It's about making sure you're receiving the best treatment
00:57 and that everything's updated.
01:00 About as useless as an oil change on a write-off.
01:03 You are not a write-off.
01:05 You are a Subaru Impreza rally car.
01:11 How do you remember that?
01:12 Because when you said it was your dream car,
01:13 I had to look it up.
01:14 I didn't know what one was.
01:15 [LAUGHS]
01:17 What'd I do without you?
01:19 It's a good job you don't have to think about that, isn't it?
01:22 Because I'm right here.
01:26 Hey.
01:27 I thought you'd have gone by now.
01:29 I didn't realize the time.
01:30 Honestly, I had to fill out that many forms
01:33 to get Harry into holiday club.
01:34 And then they were asking me about that many allergies.
01:36 I almost developed one myself.
01:39 I'll tell you what.
01:40 I'll do a swap with you if you want this morning.
01:41 I'll go and beat Elle Woods, and then you
01:42 can go and visit Uncle Stephen.
01:44 No, you're all right, thanks.
01:46 What's that look for?
01:49 Mum's saying that Gran doesn't want
01:50 to do anything for her birthday.
01:52 It's not like her.
01:53 No.
01:54 Look, I really blame her after the fiasco of last year.
01:56 You don't think she's struggling again, do you?
01:58 Well, don't make the same mistake.
02:00 Go find her and ask.
02:01 If nothing else, she'll appreciate that you care.
02:03 Yeah, OK.
02:04 I'll just add it to the very long list
02:06 of things I've got to do today.
02:07 I just-- I think things would be so much easier if people were
02:10 honest about how they feel.
02:11 Like, I don't mind helping, but I'm not a mind reader.
02:13 Hiya, it's, uh, Palforman.
02:23 Take a seat over there, please.
02:24 Yeah.
02:27 Oh, it's kept in awkward.
02:30 Shouldn't you be somewhere walking on eggshells?
02:31 Look, I'm, um, sorry I disappeared.
02:43 I had to get off, because, um--
02:44 I know why you left.
02:46 Everyone does first time.
02:48 Took me a few goes.
02:50 But inside that room, it's your future.
02:53 It's not easy seeing what's coming down that road.
02:56 Don't worry, I wasn't offended.
02:59 Oh, good.
03:01 You'll be back.
03:03 Curiosity will get you in the end.
03:05 Might even pick up some life hacks.
03:08 Death hacks, I call them.
03:09 Hitchhikers' Guide to Dying.
03:12 All the accessible pubs.
03:14 Best gin to drink, or morphine.
03:17 You always had that sense of humor.
03:18 Very much.
03:19 It's definitely getting worse.
03:22 Great thing is, you can say anything.
03:25 I mean, who's going to tell you off?
03:29 Probably get away with murder.
03:30 I got away with stealing a car.
03:41 Now that's the kind of positive mental attitude
03:44 I can get behind.
03:45 They're running behind.
03:50 Hope you like waiting.
03:52 Actually, let's grab a magazine.
03:54 We can have a flick through together.
03:57 I always play hot or not in the pictures.
03:59 Oh, not.
04:11 Tell me what you see.
04:18 Packet of biscuits.
04:20 Cheap ones.
04:21 Don't even have chocolate on them.
04:22 No, you are both missing the point.
04:25 How about I tell you what I see?
04:28 Because I see--
04:29 I see marketing meetings and product design.
04:32 I see the hopes and the dreams of a biscuit manufacturer.
04:36 I see overheads and profit margins.
04:38 I see the wheels of commerce going round and around
04:40 and around.
04:41 I see a corporate machine, and it is a beautiful thing.
04:45 Yeah, well, shame it tastes like cardboard, innit?
04:48 And your point is?
04:49 Well, you need to start seeing these things.
04:52 You need to look at the work and the detail behind the products.
04:55 Because you know, you're going to ascend to the tippity
04:57 top of the corporate ladder.
04:58 You're going to join the elite.
05:00 I'm not, though.
05:01 I'm a glorified chauffeur.
05:02 For now, it's only a matter of time
05:03 before you're the heart of it all.
05:05 No, I mean, we all have to pay our dues,
05:08 grease the wheels, so to speak.
05:09 I mean, this is just an initiation.
05:11 I mean, I did crunch some numbers last night.
05:13 Showed them to Darren.
05:14 See?
05:15 That's my buddhist ambition.
05:18 You're going to be in that office before you know it, son.
05:20 Darren's wife will be devastated.
05:22 What do you mean by that?
05:23 Well, she'll lose her ride, won't she?
05:26 Morning.
05:27 Amy, tell me what you see.
05:30 Packet of naff biscuits.
05:31 Why?
05:32 Ignore him.
05:33 Morning to you, too.
05:34 Shh.
05:35 Head's in the zone.
05:39 His head is swimming with figures and projections.
05:42 You go on, my son.
05:44 You thrust your talent in their faces.
05:46 [THUD]
05:46 [GASP]
05:47 That was rather a letdown.
05:54 Well, it was a gardening mag.
05:57 Well, do not think having a gardening mag in an MND clinic
06:00 is a bit poor taste.
06:03 I'm closer to pushing up daisies than pruning them.
06:05 [CHUCKLES]
06:06 Do you mind if I ask you how long it's been?
06:14 You've already seen my consultant.
06:17 I'm waiting for employee of the month to take me to church.
06:20 No, I meant how long have you had MND?
06:23 No.
06:25 I'm not playing that game.
06:27 Don't go trying to chat yours by mine.
06:31 We can chat about every little detail.
06:34 But talking about time, it's just a waste of it.
06:37 I guess.
06:39 Besides, you might not have my sunny disposition
06:41 to get you through the bad days.
06:44 I don't mean that in a bad way.
06:47 In the grand national of life, some ponies fall out the first.
06:51 I hope you don't, of course.
06:54 Strapping men like you?
06:58 It's ironic.
07:00 It's your mental strength that matters the most now.
07:03 If only all them gym bunnies knew.
07:06 That's the more important one.
07:09 Oh, want to come through?
07:11 Aye.
07:12 (SIGHS)
07:13 Are you going to be all right without your carer?
07:23 Carer? Not baby.
07:25 Babies have carers.
07:27 Me and you, we have personal assistants.
07:29 My PA will be here soon.
07:32 But good luck.
07:34 Ask him if he can still play the piano.
07:36 The look on his face will be priceless.
07:38 (LAUGHS)
07:41 Mum, we've got a visitor.
07:43 Oh.
07:49 Hello.
07:50 I'll just take myself anywhere else.
07:55 Erm, your last text said you were staying here.
08:01 Erm, I just wanted to pop by and see how you are.
08:05 Oh, well...
08:07 I'm...
08:09 I'm all right, you know.
08:11 Good.
08:12 Erm, I did hear about you and Stephen parting ways,
08:18 and, well, I know this will be very forward,
08:24 but, er...
08:26 I just wondered if I might take you for a drink sometime?
08:29 Oh.
08:30 I'm very flattered.
08:32 And I'd love to say yes, but...
08:35 But I just don't think I'm ready.
08:38 Oh, of course, I totally understand.
08:40 Thank you, though.
08:42 (SIGHS)
08:43 Our... Tai Chi night out was exactly what I needed.
08:48 (SIGHS)
08:49 It... It reminded me that nice men like you do actually exist.
08:53 Oh, I don't think...
08:55 And if I'm honest...
08:58 it gave me the push I needed to end things with Stephen.
09:03 I'm happy to have helped you in your thoughts.
09:07 (BIRDS CHIRP)
09:09 Getting your murder mystery on?
09:14 Yeah, I was hoping it'd put me to sleep, but it's so bad,
09:17 I'm, er... I'm weirdly hooked.
09:19 (BOTH CHUCKLE)
09:20 How's everything in the factory?
09:22 You're in hospital, OK?
09:23 You're not meant to be worrying about that kind of thing.
09:25 I, er... I got you some PJs.
09:27 Oh, thank you.
09:28 Hey, listen, I was wondering if you could give my car keys to Michael?
09:31 Maybe he could make use of my car while I'm out of action.
09:33 Well, he won't say no to that. That's very nice of you.
09:35 Well, with everything, I want to concentrate on me,
09:38 be the... the best version I can, first start.
09:41 Seems like you're in a very positive place.
09:43 Oh, I am.
09:45 Oh, er, and also, I was wondering if you could get my briefcase.
09:48 Someone recommended a book and I wrote it down.
09:50 Yeah, sure.
09:51 Yeah, only so much of this literary genius I can take.
10:04 Hey, Al. You still here?
10:06 Yep. Can't get rid of me.
10:08 Do you know when your, er, PA will be back?
10:12 Hopefully soon.
10:14 Apparently, this is a safe place to leave me and my home.
10:18 It's a change in the guard. One shift's finished and the other's stuck in traffic.
10:23 How many have you got?
10:25 I'm collecting them. It's like stamps in a book.
10:28 Few more, I'll get one free.
10:32 To be honest, I'd be lost without them.
10:34 Good PAs are hard to find.
10:36 Mine lot are brilliant.
10:38 How was your appointment?
10:41 He said I'm cured.
10:44 Great!
10:46 Oh, put you on as a PA on my roster.
10:49 It's an easy job and you don't have to cook for me.
10:52 What is that? Is that for food?
10:56 It's an NJ. It's not a peg one.
10:59 Cos apparently I have a high-riding stomach.
11:01 Who knew?
11:03 Don't worry, he'll get used to all the acronyms.
11:05 Just cos I've got one, don't mean you will.
11:10 I've been trying lots to think about when I can't eat.
11:14 Mm. It's hard to shove a bacon bomb through this.
11:18 Sauce gets everywhere.
11:30 I'm really scared, Shelley.
11:32 Me too.
11:36 I've been trying to convince myself that I wasn't.
11:39 Stop it.
11:41 Just let it in.
11:43 If you weren't scared, there really would be something wrong with you.
11:47 When I was at school, I was really into drama.
11:52 I stood on stage petrified once.
11:54 My drama teacher bellows,
11:56 "If you're nervous, it's cos you're not making choices."
12:00 It's just always stuck with me.
12:02 So you're saying I have to start deciding stuff?
12:08 Take back control.
12:10 The one thing this can't take from you - free will.
12:15 But there will come a point
12:20 when you won't be able to tell people what you want.
12:23 So you need to plan.
12:27 It's the last chapter, Paul.
12:29 If there's anything you're desperate to do,
12:33 jump out of a plane, get married.
12:36 Now is the time to do it.
12:39 How the book ends, that's up to you.
12:44 MUSIC PLAYS
12:47 - Oh! - Sorry.
13:00 I thought you'd have your head in a book, not a phone.
13:03 - I'm reading the news. - I try not to. It's all too bleak.
13:06 - Mind to adjust. See you. - Ta-ra.
13:08 Oh, Paul.
13:11 Yeah. I was just about to text you. How did it go?
13:14 Er, good, actually. Yeah, really good.
13:17 I mean, the appointment was boring,
13:19 but I met Shelly again from the support group.
13:22 We just got chatting properly. She's a great laugh.
13:25 Oh, good. Oh, this is... this is great.
13:28 Yeah, actually, it helps me clear up some things in my head.
13:32 Anything you want to share?
13:34 Yeah, actually, there is something I want to ask you.
13:37 - Can we meet at the flat in a bit? - Yeah, sure.
13:40 - OK, I won't be long. - All right.
13:42 Get a room, will ya?!
13:45 I thought you had a lunch date.
13:51 I do.
13:52 With you.
13:54 This isn't a date.
13:56 Well, that's odd, because all the signs are suggesting otherwise.
14:00 Nice place, table for two...
14:03 ..drinks.
14:05 No candle. It's not a date without a candle.
14:08 Well, I'm sure I can get a candle-lap.
14:11 It's not a date.
14:13 Then why are we going to leave here?
14:16 To go and have sex?
14:18 We're not.
14:20 Last night, I...
14:22 I shouldn't have done that.
14:24 - You regret it? - Yes.
14:27 So you didn't...
14:30 - ..like it? - Yes.
14:32 No, I mean, I did like it.
14:37 (Door opens)
14:39 - Amy, hi. - Hi.
14:43 This is Amy from our shop.
14:45 Courtney. Lovely to meet you.
14:47 Nice to meet you, too.
14:49 Your dad sent me in for a posh coffee.
14:51 Anything to get away from him and the stock take.
14:54 - It's doing my head in. - I would say join us, but, erm...
14:57 ..we're just about to leave.
15:00 No worries. Nice to meet you.
15:05 - Where are we going? - You'll see.
15:07 Come along.
15:09 Are you timing my lunches now?
15:14 You've had a letter.
15:16 - What's with the excited face? - Come on, just open it.
15:19 Come on!
15:21 "Been nominated for Young Funeral Director of the Year."
15:34 Yes! I knew it! Same envelope they always use.
15:37 - Is that even a thing? - Oh, yes.
15:39 I remember when I was nominated for a stiffy.
15:41 - A beggy pan? - No.
15:43 It's what we in the trade used to call it.
15:45 It's the Emmys of the funeral world.
15:47 The actual award used to be a little gold man in full rigor mortis.
15:50 Hence the name.
15:52 Until someone said it was in poor taste, so...
15:54 It's just a coffin-shaped award now.
15:56 But I got nominated one year.
15:58 Did you get us...award?
16:00 No. No.
16:02 I lost out to Pep from a rival Italian firm.
16:05 He sings "Conte Partiro" for free as he lowers the casket.
16:08 Voice of an angel, mind.
16:10 Have a right of your po' bearers have heard of him.
16:12 But my father received the Lifetime Achievement Award.
16:15 Oh, yeah? What do they call them?
16:17 Lifetime Achievement Award.
16:19 Ah. That's rather disappointing.
16:21 Oi, that's...
16:23 That's my dinner!
16:26 DOOR OPENS
16:28 - Fuck! - Argh!
16:39 You realise that could have been someone robbing the place?
16:43 What? With a key?
16:45 What you listening to?
16:47 Metro booming in the weekend.
16:49 Some called Creeping.
16:51 Quite good, actually.
16:53 I knew who they were.
16:55 Well, it's a cover of a 2004 Mario Wynans song.
16:59 Yeah, well, I was already uncool in 2004.
17:03 Well, in the original, they sampled an Enya track.
17:07 Oh, I do recognise Enya, but I probably shouldn't admit to that.
17:11 Enya's super cool.
17:13 Anyway, what are you, erm...
17:15 What are you up to now?
17:17 Er, nothing. Why? What do you fancy doing?
17:19 Wait, it was just...this morning, me and Paul,
17:22 we were just having a moment.
17:24 Oh, so you just want a little private time?
17:27 No, it's just...he said he got something to ask me.
17:31 Really?
17:34 What, you don't think it could be, like, getting down on one knee?
17:38 Well, I must admit, the thought did cross my mind.
17:41 What would you say?
17:43 Yes, obviously, but my job...
17:45 We wouldn't let your job get in the way.
17:47 No, no, but it's...you know, it's complicated.
17:49 Oh, no, it isn't. Billy, just say yes.
17:52 And I will go and get a coffee.
17:55 THEY LAUGH
17:58 Right.
18:01 Coffee table.
18:05 Right hand side, second fired up.
18:08 Yeah, I can see it. Just give me a minute.
18:10 You might have to get dressed and fetch another bottle.
18:12 Oh, I'm gonna have to call you back.
18:14 Addy!
18:16 Addy, you've got a guest!
18:18 Sorry, I'm a bit...a bit out of breath.
18:21 I need to explain some things you really can't unhear.
18:24 Who is it?
18:26 Oh...
18:28 Yeah, I can't explain it. It's exactly what it looks like.
18:33 Good to know. We just needed this file for the stock take.
18:37 How's it going?
18:39 Are you seriously asking me that right now?
18:42 I'm gonna go.
18:47 DOORBELL RINGS
18:49 You know, I never knew who to sit at the beach track.
18:59 She's cute.
19:01 Now, come on, tiger, let's go.
19:03 Rrrrr!
19:05 So how did it go with the pacemaker?
19:08 Don't call him that.
19:10 He asked me out.
19:13 Respectfully, you know, cos he knows I've only just broken up with Stephen.
19:18 Did he start by saying, "Don't let the sun catch you crying"?
19:21 Oh! Are you leaving us?
19:23 When did he pack that?
19:25 It was packed already.
19:27 I hope you're not taking a ferry across the Mersey.
19:29 Timothy!
19:31 Old Jerry's just been asking her out.
19:34 Whoa, he didn't waste any time, did he?
19:36 Was he saying, "I like it, I like it"?
19:38 Do you know what? One more of those and I'm really gonna get angry.
19:41 So what did you say?
19:43 I said no. I just...
19:45 I just need some time to be me.
19:47 Yeah.
19:49 Do you want Tim to carry your bag back to the flat?
19:51 No, I'm not going back to the flat.
19:53 I'm, er... I'm gonna stay with my friend Sue in Scarborough.
19:56 Well, you know you should really stay here, Mum. Let us look after you.
19:59 No. No, no, no. I need time to think.
20:02 But this is all my fault.
20:04 I've made up my mind.
20:07 DOOR OPENS
20:09 DOOR CLOSES
20:11 Hiya.
20:13 You spill your tea down you or something?
20:15 No, I just... I'd get spruced up out of my work here.
20:19 What's that smell?
20:21 Oh, it's a candle.
20:23 Thought it smelled nice.
20:25 Well, erm, how was the climate thing?
20:30 Oh, yeah, it was fine.
20:32 I, er...
20:34 I, er...
20:36 thought you'd got something you wanted to ask me.
20:39 Yeah.
20:42 I've been doing some thinking.
20:45 Go on.
20:47 About what I want, you know.
20:49 How I want this to play out.
20:51 Speaking to Shelley, erm...
20:54 She's right. Time isn't on my side, so...
20:57 I've got a plan.
20:59 Get on with things.
21:02 I'm going to ask me to you.
21:04 Me?
21:06 What if what I want gets you into trouble, you know, with the big man?
21:12 Well, erm, without knowing what it is, it's hard to say.
21:17 But...
21:19 you do know that you come first, right?
21:23 You are my number one priority.
21:25 Your happiness means everything.
21:31 I'm sorry, Dad.
21:33 Knowing what I'd like and what you're allowed don't exactly go together.
21:38 I love you.
21:42 And I wouldn't want to put you in a position
21:44 where you have to choose between me and your faith.
21:48 Just...
21:50 ask me.
21:52 OK?
21:55 I know that someday...
21:58 I won't be able to say and do the things that I want.
22:01 So before that happens...
22:03 I want you to promise me that you'll help me end my life.
22:09 (Sips)
22:11 This isn't funny.
22:31 I'm being serious.
22:35 You want me to kill you?
22:38 I didn't say that.
22:40 You can dress it up however you like, but that's what you're talking about.
22:43 You'd be putting me out of my misery.
22:45 Like a dog?
22:47 Maybe you need some more time to think about it.
22:50 You are?
22:54 Are you serious? Are we...
22:56 Are we really having this conversation?
22:59 I told you I'd been speaking to Shelley.
23:02 Is that what she's gonna do?
23:04 No, I don't think so, but...
23:07 but she's stronger than me.
23:09 If she can deal with what's coming, I can.
23:11 You don't know how you're gonna be feeling!
23:13 I'm just asking you to think about it.
23:15 Yeah? I come first, that's what you said.
23:17 Well, prove it.
23:19 You love me, don't you?
23:21 That isn't fair.
23:23 Fair?
23:25 (Clears throat)
23:27 Right, I'm 32, and I struggle to get out of the bath on my own.
23:31 At some point, I won't be able to speak.
23:34 I won't be able to feed myself.
23:36 You'll have to help me get on and off the toilet.
23:38 And it's only gonna get worse, so...
23:41 don't talk to me about fair.
23:43 Will you at least think about it?
24:00 Wow. Just wow.
24:03 You're not gonna tell anyone, are you?
24:05 I mean, wow.
24:07 Stop saying wow.
24:08 She must be, like, 40.
24:10 She's only 30.
24:11 She's your boss's wife!
24:12 I know.
24:13 Your dad is gonna kill you.
24:15 Her husband's gonna kill me.
24:17 How long's this been going on for?
24:19 It started last night.
24:21 What were you thinking? Or weren't you thinking?
24:23 I'm... I'm just trying to keep everybody happy.
24:26 Well, she looked happy, I'll give you that.
24:28 Look, if you're just gonna take the mick...
24:30 Stop panicking, OK?
24:32 I'm not gonna say anything.
24:33 It's not gonna happen again.
24:35 It's her.
24:41 What am I gonna do?
24:43 Don't think he wanted to take that call.
24:51 It's the woman from the wholesalers.
24:53 She's very pushy.
24:56 DOOR BEEPS
24:58 The kettle's just boiled.
25:00 Well, I can't stop her.
25:01 I've got to go and pick something up for Uncle Stephen, but listen...
25:04 So, Gran still doesn't want to do anything for her birthday,
25:07 but I was thinking maybe me and you could go out.
25:09 1940 Audrey was born.
25:12 She's seen it all.
25:13 From World War II to the pandemic.
25:15 Mm. Well, we're the same hairdo.
25:17 So, do you fancy it, then?
25:19 Me and you go somewhere for our tea?
25:21 Yeah. Yeah, if you like.
25:23 Don't sound too excited.
25:25 Is everything OK? Yeah.
25:27 OK, well, listen, you can tell me now,
25:30 or I can get it out of you tonight, cos I know there's something.
25:33 I don't know how to panic inside yesterday.
25:37 It didn't last very long. I don't know what caused it.
25:40 Me? I caused it.
25:42 This is why I didn't want to tell you.
25:44 I've done this to you. I mean, you've been paranoid...
25:47 I haven't helped myself, OK? It's pathetic.
25:49 Audrey was the one brought up with bombs and rations,
25:52 and I'm the one having panic attacks.
25:54 Stop it. Come on. Stop acting like it's nothing.
25:56 You can't pull up how you feel.
25:58 I just want it to stop happening.
26:00 Well, listen, we can talk about it tonight, yeah?
26:03 We'll sort it. Together.
26:05 You're not thinking straight.
26:18 You're depressed. It's understandable.
26:22 I am not depressed.
26:24 Sad, yeah. Angry, yeah.
26:27 Scared, obviously.
26:30 Of dying, but what I'm most scared of is getting to the point
26:33 where I don't want to be here any more
26:35 and there's nothing I can do about it.
26:37 I just have to sit there and suffer
26:39 while everyone else makes decisions for me.
26:41 Is that how you want me to go out?
26:43 What I want is for us to make the most of the time that we've got left.
26:47 So do I.
26:49 I just want to cut out the nasty bit at the end.
26:52 That's still part of life.
26:54 That's easy for you to say.
26:56 Look, I've got stuff I need to do at work.
27:01 It's not as important as this.
27:04 I am not going to help you kill yourself.
27:07 It's called assisted dying.
27:10 As far as I'm concerned, it is still killing, and it is wrong.
27:14 Not to mention it's against the law.
27:16 I don't think anyone's ever been banged up for it.
27:19 That doesn't make it right.
27:21 Look, I'm not saying I'm definitely going to do it.
27:24 Yeah? I'm going to look into it properly.
27:27 Do the research, and if it is something I decide to do,
27:31 then I hope you'll support me.
27:33 Let's just look at a few websites, yeah?
27:39 Like I said, I've not done the research,
27:41 but I do know that it's legal in some countries,
27:43 so I don't know, maybe we could go abroad.
27:46 Could we? Get a nice little holiday out of it?
27:49 Kill two birds, and my boyfriend?
27:51 Look, you're not even prepared to talk about this, are you?
27:54 No. I'm not sitting here planning ways to make sure
27:57 that we have less time together.
27:59 Well, yeah. Great.
28:01 Just think of all those extra weeks we could have
28:03 where I can't move a muscle, and you're feeding me through a straw.
28:06 Can't wait.
28:09 DOOR OPENS
28:11 DOOR CLOSES
28:17 Take care of yourself, OK?
28:19 She's going to Scarborough, she's not climbing the Himalayas.
28:22 Give us a ring when you get there, eh? Free rings.
28:24 Yeah. She knew already.
28:26 THEY CHUCKLE
28:36 Do you think I should warn her about Stephen?
28:38 And say what? I mean, you don't trust him anyway, do you?
28:42 She's with Owen, she's not interested in Stephen.
28:45 Is Elaine leaving?
28:49 Looks that way.
28:51 Erm, how's Stephen?
28:54 There was a point we thought we were going to lose him.
28:57 But, yeah, he seems to be doing all right, actually.
28:59 I'm just back off to the hospital now.
29:01 Oh, well, give him my love.
29:03 Well, maybe you could. I'm sure he'd love to see you.
29:06 No, you can't be here.
29:17 Well, you weren't saying that a couple of hours ago.
29:19 My dad'll be home any minute.
29:21 All right, calm down.
29:23 She come to get me glasses. I think I left them in the bedroom.
29:26 I remember taking them off when I was looking for something in my handbag.
29:29 Didn't know you wore glasses.
29:31 I thought you didn't know about me. You're a quick learner, though.
29:34 Would you lighten up? It's just a bit of fun.
29:38 Won't be much fun when your husband finds out.
29:40 He might start paying a bit more attention to me.
29:43 You're not going to tell him?
29:45 Of course not.
29:47 Amy's not going to say anything.
29:49 Right. Well, we've got nothing to worry about, then, have we?
29:51 Unless someone finds my glasses.
29:53 Hey, what are you doing tonight, by the way?
29:55 No, we can't.
29:57 No, it's just I've got two tickets for a box at Weatherfield County.
30:00 Darren's out golfing again and I don't want to go on my own.
30:03 I don't think that's a good idea.
30:05 Look, you're just my driver from now on, OK?
30:07 It's strictly professional. I know, but...
30:09 You want to help your dad get this deal over the line, don't you?
30:12 It's going to look a bit suspicious if we start avoiding each other.
30:15 OK.
30:17 All right, then.
30:19 Now, glasses. Off you pop.
30:21 (thudding)
30:23 (clears throat)
30:29 (typing)
30:47 (typing)
30:49 (sighs)
31:02 It's your birthday. You should be out gallivanting.
31:05 Oh, my gallivanting days are well over, sweetheart.
31:08 Oh, come on, we can go for a quick snifter on the way home.
31:11 No, thank you. Oh, just one drink.
31:13 Happy birthday!
31:15 Oh, you remembered the cake.
31:17 I hope you're not expecting me to blow out 83 candles.
31:20 Where's these? Oh, I see.
31:22 Oh, no, I can manage that. Thank you so much.
31:25 I haven't had a chance to get you anything.
31:27 I don't want a present. I want you to pull through, please.
31:30 Oh, well, I won't bother giving you that
31:32 and voucher for the massage parlor, then.
31:34 Massage? Oh, it's not one of those knocking shocks, is it?
31:37 Ooh, I hope so, cos I'm coming with you.
31:40 Erm, I brought your briefcase in and I bumped into Jenny
31:44 and she said she might pop in.
31:46 Jenny? Oh, as one door closes.
31:49 Oh, we're just good friends.
31:51 Look at you. Young funeral director of the year.
31:57 And I said you'd never amount to anything.
31:59 You said I'd never amount to anything.
32:01 I'm joking. I'm dead chuffed for you.
32:03 Is it like the Oscars? Do you get a goody bag at the funeral awards?
32:06 You get a coffin on a keeling and a jar of embalming fluid.
32:09 You're not funny, right? Either of you.
32:11 Be on your own, love.
32:13 More ways than one.
32:15 You know what? I'll have a shot and all.
32:18 Erm, what's that blue stuff?
32:20 Curacao. That bottle's been here longer than I have.
32:23 Yeah, go on, then, why not?
32:25 Try something new while you still can. That's my motto.
32:28 Are you all right, love? Never better.
32:31 Are you sure? Can I just have the shot, please?
32:34 # That's the life I want
32:39 # That's the life I want
32:43 # That's the life I want
32:48 # That's the life I want
32:53 # That's the life I want
32:56 # That's the life I want
33:00 What about a new suit for the big night?
33:04 Can you at least pretend to be interested about this funeral thing?
33:08 You've done nothing but joke about it.
33:10 Anyway, I've told you, I'm not going.
33:12 You are going if I have to drag you. This is a big deal to George.
33:15 I don't care how big it is.
33:17 What, are you talking about giving you a pay rise?
33:20 I suppose I could show my face for a bit.
33:25 If you have to stop and take a little drive in an electric car,
33:29 it's probably not a sport, but it's all he wants to do.
33:33 Two more. We should be getting to the match.
33:37 Oh, by the way, I forgot to tell you.
33:39 I've got two VIP tickets to see Olly Mays in Liverpool next month.
33:42 Dallin did a charity golf too, of course, so...
33:45 You'd be interested? It might start getting a bit weird.
33:48 No, I know. I prefer his old stuff as well.
33:51 # I just want you to dance with me tonight... #
33:55 Well, not just.
33:58 People are looking.
34:00 I can't help it. I like nice things.
34:03 And I like being able to walk.
34:05 Your husband's going to break my legs with a five-iron.
34:08 I'll push you.
34:10 Look, it's not like I'm going to leave him to shack up with an 18-year-old.
34:13 But it doesn't mean we can't have some.
34:16 Come on.
34:18 Hey, I've booked a room upstairs.
34:21 You didn't really want to go to the football, did you?
34:26 HEAVY FOOTSTEPS
34:29 So?
34:38 Did he propose?
34:40 Paul, er... No. No.
34:42 Oh.
34:44 What did he want to ask you?
34:46 Oh, no, it was... It was nothing.
34:48 Well, it must have meant something.
34:50 He just, er, he wanted to talk about where we were at
34:53 and all this benefit stuff, his pip, his income support.
34:56 I don't want to bore you with it.
34:58 So there's not going to be a wedding, then?
35:01 No. No, I'm afraid not.
35:04 I'm sorry.
35:07 Me too.
35:09 Tell me what's wrong.
35:11 Nothing's wrong. I'm fine.
35:13 Jeez, I'm just trying to have a quiet drink.
35:21 Oh, which apparently is impossible in here.
35:23 You looking for business?
35:25 Whoa, that came out wrong.
35:27 It was a joke, you know, cos you work in a funeral parlour and I'm dying.
35:30 Yeah, I got it.
35:32 It's a bit early for shots, isn't it?
35:34 Well, that's the thing with M&D.
35:36 Everyone just assumes you're drunk anyway, so...
35:38 What's all this about?
35:40 Oh, putting it on the bad side.
35:43 Very sneaky.
35:46 HE SIGHS
35:48 I asked Billy, would he help me?
35:53 You know, when the time comes, he didn't take it so well.
35:57 Help you with what? Washing up? Times cross with?
36:00 He didn't.
36:06 Only when I can't do stuff for myself anymore.
36:08 You know, when I can't speak or move or swallow properly.
36:12 I mean, would you want to carry on living like that?
36:15 Er... Probably not.
36:17 This is Billy we're talking about.
36:19 It goes against everything that he believes in.
36:22 So, what, he just wants to see me suffer?
36:25 Of course he wouldn't.
36:27 It's a massive thing that you're asking him to do.
36:30 Not just cos of his job, but cos he doesn't want to lose you.
36:35 Come on, then.
36:38 Ah, here she is, the birthday girl, 83 years old.
36:41 Oh, and I've still got all my marbles.
36:43 Well, almost.
36:45 Oh, there's plenty of life in this old dog.
36:48 Oh, sorry, sweetheart.
36:52 What was that about marbles?
36:55 Er, happy birthday, Audrey.
36:57 - All the best, Audrey. - Thank you.
36:59 83?
37:01 I'll just talk to Billy, sort it out.
37:10 (SIGHS)
37:12 So he's playing up for ten and he's cards 106 on the 72 course?
37:18 I mean... Oh, I had to laugh.
37:20 Well, you would, wouldn't you?
37:22 Don't ask.
37:24 If that isn't bad enough, OK, get to the clubhouse and guess what?
37:27 He's booked a table for two and Miss Courtney is a no-show.
37:31 - Have we gone for a meal? - She's stood him up.
37:34 But you haven't seen her, have you?
37:36 Courtney? No, not since this afternoon in the bistro.
37:39 I'm telling you, Darren, he was shooing.
37:41 Listen, come here, just between us.
37:44 OK, I think they're having problems in the bedroom department,
37:48 - if you know what I'm saying. - I think we know what you're saying.
37:51 - Sexually saying. - Dad!
37:53 - Something wrong with your neck? - I'm not one to gossip, OK,
37:56 but I don't want no marital problems, put a moccasin on this deal.
37:59 OK, so the next time you see this Courtney,
38:01 do a bit of digging, get under her skin.
38:03 I'm really sorry, I've got to go.
38:05 Just dropped by to pop the file back.
38:07 - Yeah. - Addy, see me out?
38:09 - Bye. - Bye.
38:11 See you.
38:13 You have got lipstick on your neck.
38:17 I thought you said you weren't going to see her any more.
38:19 I couldn't help it.
38:34 I, erm, I don't want to fight.
38:37 Someone's going to have to get something for tea.
38:40 She'll be back any minute.
38:42 I don't want to fight either.
38:44 I haven't told her what you said.
38:49 And I'm really sorry, if you think I'm being selfish, maybe I am.
38:53 Obviously, you can tell her if you want to,
38:56 but I'm not going to change my mind.
38:59 You don't have to. I've changed mine.
39:02 I shouldn't have asked. Forget I said anything.
39:05 Forget? Because you don't want to end your life,
39:09 or because you're going to go and do it without me?
39:12 I don't want to end my life.
39:15 You seemed pretty certain about it before.
39:21 You were right, I wasn't thinking straight.
39:24 You're not just saying that.
39:28 I want to spend more time together.
39:31 Not less.
39:33 You know, when you said you'd got something to ask me,
39:38 I thought that...
39:40 Oh, no, it doesn't matter what I thought.
39:43 What?
39:44 No, no, just forget about it.
39:47 No, go on.
39:49 I thought you were going to propose.
39:55 I know, stupid, innit?
39:59 Did you want me to propose?
40:01 No, obviously, yes,
40:04 but only if that was something you wanted to do.
40:06 Just forget I said anything.
40:08 No, no, it's a good idea.
40:10 I mean, I think I'm going to struggle to get her down on one knee,
40:13 but will you marry me?
40:15 No, honestly, forget it.
40:17 I'm serious.
40:19 You sure?
40:24 I'm sure.
40:29 Will you marry me?
40:31 Yes, of course I'll marry you.
40:34 You go out for five minutes?
40:40 LAUGHTER
40:42 No rest for the wicked, eh?
41:00 Oh, well, it's just a bit of paperwork.
41:02 How are you feeling?
41:04 Better now.
41:06 Flattery will get you nowhere.
41:08 Oh, thank you.
41:10 Hey, listen, have a seat.
41:12 So what have you done to yourself, then?
41:15 I hear it was almost good now at Vienna.
41:17 Was that Mark Twain quote?
41:20 "Reports of my demise have been greatly exaggerated."
41:23 What about the reports of your relationship?
41:26 No, that is definitely dead.
41:29 I saw Elaine leaving before.
41:31 Well, Elaine's a wonderful person,
41:34 but I don't think we were ever really meant for each other.
41:38 Well, I've got to be honest, I never really thought she was your type.
41:42 Who do you think is my type?
41:45 PHONE RINGS
41:48 Oh! It's Owen.
41:51 Hi, Owen.
41:53 Huh? Tonight?
41:56 Cheeky! I am not that kind of girl.
41:59 Actually, I'm completely that kind of girl.
42:02 Yeah, well, you'll just have to wait and see, won't you?
42:06 So, are you going to talk to anyone?
42:10 I'm speaking to you.
42:12 I know. I mean a professional.
42:14 I mean, it's happened more than once now,
42:16 and if you don't do anything about it, it might keep happening.
42:19 Hey, you OK?
42:21 Yeah. Yeah, good, actually. Really good.
42:23 I'm good. Adam's good.
42:25 So, yeah, we're both good.
42:27 Well, that's good. He knows I had another panic attack.
42:30 HE SIGHS
42:32 He knew before I did.
42:33 Look, I didn't want to worry you when I'm fine.
42:35 Well, you're not fine, because it keeps happening.
42:38 All right, if it happens again, I'll think about speaking to someone.
42:41 You'll think about it? I'll speak to someone.
42:44 Cheers. Cheers, you mind if I just...?
42:46 Yeah.
42:48 Do you mean that?
42:52 Yeah, I promise.
42:54 I've got the scan tomorrow, haven't me, so if I'm going to be a dad,
42:57 I need to be in good shape.
42:59 Where are these starters?
43:01 Chips on the way home. On a Monday?
43:04 I'll treat you.
43:05 Seems you've been nominated for Young Funeral Director of the Year.
43:08 You have to get nominated more often.
43:10 I've had chips for my lunch.
43:12 So what? You can have chips twice in one day.
43:14 Hang on, did you say Young Funeral Director?
43:17 Don't you start.
43:18 Yeah. Listen, what did you say to our Paul? Is he all right?
43:21 You're probably just about to find out.
43:25 I guess he was getting married.
43:28 Are you kidding me?
43:30 No, Paul's just proposed.
43:32 Oh, congratulations!
43:34 Oh, my God! Oh, my God! Oh, my God!
43:37 Shall we have one more drink? Yeah, go on.
43:39 Bottle of fizz, please, Jed.
43:41 He talked to me about the other day.
43:45 You were right. It was a bad idea.
43:47 I didn't say that. I just said, "Talk to him."
43:50 I did.
43:52 I've decided to drop it.
43:54 Is that what you want?
43:56 You know, when you can't do stuff for yourself any more?
43:59 Yeah. Of course it's what I want.
44:02 Oh, yeah!
44:08 If you have been affected by issues raised in tonight's episode,
44:17 you can go to itv.com/advice for support information.
44:22 Next year on ITV1, it's all new Long Lost Family.
44:26 (theme music)
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44:37 (theme music)
44:39 (upbeat music)