Not Everyone's a Film Critic - October 03 2023
Category
😹
FunTranscript
00:00 (upbeat music)
00:02 - Hello and welcome back to Not Everyone's a Film Critic,
00:10 a long overdue podcast brought to you by The Scotsman
00:13 and presented by myself as always, Graeme Fogg.
00:16 I'm joined by Dave Hepburn.
00:18 Dave, it's been ages 'cause we've been like doing stuff,
00:21 life, but how are you?
00:22 You all right?
00:23 - Yeah, I'm doing well.
00:24 Well, you've been in Tuscany, haven't you?
00:25 You flashed it to me.
00:26 That's just ridiculous.
00:28 You're going back in the world
00:29 instead of watching films and coming on this podcast,
00:31 but it's good to be back after a couple of weeks off.
00:33 - Indeed.
00:34 Yes, I was staying in a very luxury villa
00:37 for a nice wee press trip where David Bowie was married.
00:40 So today's episode is all about "Labyrinth."
00:42 No, it's not.
00:43 I wish it was.
00:45 But we have seen films.
00:48 I know there was a period of time last time we were here
00:49 where we kind of hadn't because the fringe was on
00:53 and things had happened.
00:55 We have seen films and we are gonna have, as always,
00:59 the topic of the week, which is a bit more basic this week,
01:01 but it makes it no less fun,
01:03 especially not with my picks
01:04 'cause I've purposely gone down the hilarious route.
01:07 Best movie heroes ever.
01:09 But before we get into that, Dave, I've seen a few things,
01:11 but I'll ask you first.
01:12 What have you seen this week?
01:14 - Oh, I've seen absolutely loads of stuff.
01:15 Like since the last time we were here,
01:17 I've seen a lot of stuff,
01:18 but just to narrow it down to a couple,
01:19 I know that you've seen a couple of films
01:20 that I've seen as well.
01:21 So just a couple of films to talk about.
01:23 First up, the big release this week, "The Creator,"
01:26 which is a big kind of sci-fi epic from Gareth Edwards.
01:29 Gareth Edwards, really interesting director.
01:31 He became famous 'cause of a film called "Monsters."
01:36 If you ever saw "Monsters,"
01:36 it's this amazing low-budget film.
01:38 It's absolutely superb.
01:39 And then because of that and the great special effects he did
01:41 with very little budget,
01:43 he's basically become a big budget filmmaker.
01:45 So he did a "Godzilla" film,
01:46 he did "Rogue One" in the "Star Wars" universe,
01:48 and now he's back with an original film called "The Creator,"
01:50 which he's written, directed, the whole works, basically.
01:54 It is a big film that a lot of people
01:56 are gonna absolutely adore.
01:57 It's your classic sci-fi thing.
01:59 It's the year 2055,
02:01 and an artificial intelligence
02:03 has basically taken over the world
02:04 and has nuked Los Angeles.
02:07 So basically Los Angeles is gone.
02:09 The AI has just done it in a "Terminator" style.
02:12 - AI has done it already.
02:13 This is the year 2023.
02:15 You don't need to wait that long.
02:16 - Yeah, I mean, this really doesn't feel like science fiction
02:18 and it does feel a wee bit too far in the future
02:20 when this stuff's gonna happen next year, isn't it?
02:22 But I mean-
02:23 - All my articles are written in AI, Dave.
02:25 - Well, of course they are.
02:26 You don't do anything all day, do you?
02:27 You just do chat and GPT, that's it.
02:30 - This is AI.
02:32 It's not even me.
02:33 - No, no, so I mean, basically this is now,
02:36 but there is a war between humans and AI
02:38 and all of the AI robots have basically fled
02:42 to Southeast Asia like so many gap year backpackers.
02:46 And basically the US is looking to wipe all AI
02:49 off the face of the earth.
02:50 And in quite a refreshing thing,
02:51 the US are the bad guys in this.
02:53 There's no doubt about it, which is really nice to see.
02:55 It'll be interesting to see how it goes over in the US
02:58 because the US are bad guys like they are
03:00 in some of these Starship troopers.
03:02 And they are kind of fascists.
03:04 So it's an interesting idea.
03:06 It looks beautiful.
03:07 You know, Gareth Edwards is brilliant at making spaceships
03:11 and kind of dystopian landscapes and stuff.
03:14 It looks absolutely wonderful.
03:15 The issue that I hide with it is it's very serious.
03:18 It's very, very poor faced.
03:20 It thinks it is very important.
03:23 And it makes that clear to the viewer.
03:25 Also the lead actor in it is John David Washington,
03:30 who's Denzel's son.
03:32 And he just always comes across
03:33 as being a not as good Denzel Washington.
03:35 And it's very hard for him
03:36 because obviously his father's one of the greatest actors
03:38 to ever have lived, but he decided to go into acting.
03:41 No one forced him to do it.
03:42 And you know, you close your eyes
03:44 and he sounds like his dad.
03:45 You close your eyes and go, "Oh, Denzel's there."
03:47 And then you look at it and it's a slightly tedious actor
03:51 who doesn't really have a massive amount of charisma.
03:53 So the film I didn't get on massively well with,
03:56 I found it quite boring
03:57 and I found I had no emotional attachment to it.
04:00 Lots of people love it.
04:01 So I think this is one which is a matter of taste
04:04 more than anything else.
04:05 I like my sci-fi to be kind of spiky and satirical
04:09 and funny, you know, something like "District 9,"
04:11 which I know is one of your favorite films as well.
04:13 That's how I like my sci-fi.
04:14 It's kind of light and serious
04:16 and you can have a giggle at it.
04:17 Whereas I think there's two jokes in here,
04:19 one of which is very funny.
04:21 It also borrows a lot from everything from, well,
04:24 "Star Wars," which is already made a "Star Wars" film.
04:26 A lot of the stuff looks quite "Star Warsy."
04:29 And then because it's set in Southeast Asia,
04:31 lots of Vietnam War film references as well.
04:34 Things like "Apocalypse Now," which is not a bad thing.
04:37 You know, combining sci-fi with a Vietnam War movie
04:39 is a really good idea.
04:41 So it works in places.
04:42 I found it boring.
04:43 Go and see it.
04:44 I would urge anyone to go and see it.
04:45 It's gonna be a massively talked about film.
04:47 And like I say, a lot of people will love it.
04:48 A lot of people will say it's a classic sci-fi film.
04:50 Left me a little bit cold,
04:52 which is something that cannot be said for a second film
04:55 I'm gonna talk about, which is my favorite film of the year.
04:58 And I think it's probably gonna go into,
05:00 if I was to make such a list,
05:01 my top 20 films of all time, and that's "Past Lives."
05:05 And I'm gonna try to sell this to you, Graham,
05:06 so I don't think you've seen it
05:07 and there's nothing you're planning to go and see it.
05:09 And I want you to go and see it.
05:10 I think everyone should go and see it.
05:11 It's kind of a romance.
05:13 And I think that maybe puts some people off.
05:16 But the basic story, I would not wanna spoil any of it
05:18 'cause even though it is a romance,
05:19 it's got more twists in it than a lot of thrillers.
05:21 A lot of really interesting, strange stuff happens
05:23 that you don't expect to happen.
05:25 Wrong fits you a lot.
05:26 The premise of it is very simple.
05:28 There's two 12-year-old kids in Korea, in Seoul,
05:31 and they kind of fall in love at the age of 12.
05:33 They have a crush on each other.
05:34 But then the girl is taken away by her parents
05:38 to go and live in Canada.
05:39 And they're basically destined never to meet again.
05:43 But then 12 years later, she's moved on again to New York
05:47 and they make contact via Facebook
05:49 and they reconnect in a kind of magical way.
05:53 The entire thing is underpinned by the concept
05:55 of something called in-yeon, which is a Korean word
05:58 for a theory that we all live thousands of past lives.
06:03 And in order to meet your soulmate,
06:04 you're gonna meet them a thousand times before in tiny ways.
06:07 Your sleeves might touch in one life.
06:09 You might meet, go out and break up in another life.
06:12 And eventually after 12,000 layers of in-yeon,
06:15 you are with your soulmate
06:16 and you live your best life together.
06:17 So it's a hugely romantic notion.
06:19 It's really quite beautiful.
06:20 And in this, it's kind of used to create
06:22 a funny kind of multiverse almost
06:24 of infinite possibilities within relationships.
06:27 And it's fascinating.
06:28 And it's one of these very rare films
06:29 that made me look at the world a slightly different way,
06:32 which I'm a sucker for.
06:32 I came out of it and had a very emotional response to it.
06:35 And I just find it absolutely fascinating,
06:37 incredibly romantic, incredibly sad.
06:40 It opens with this amazing framing device
06:43 where you see the three main characters
06:45 through the eyes of a stranger.
06:46 And it ends with a scene which, I mean,
06:49 absolutely destroyed me with its beauty and tragedy.
06:52 In my sold out screening,
06:54 everybody started crying at exactly the same time.
06:56 You could actually hear the sniffles happen
06:59 just at this immensely magical moment.
07:01 It's a debut feature film by Celine Song.
07:04 I think she's gonna win the best director Oscar for it.
07:07 I think it might win best picture as well.
07:09 I think all three of the leads,
07:11 Greta Lee, T.O.U. and John Magaro,
07:14 I think they will all get up for best acting honors as well.
07:19 And I just think it is a genuinely perfect film.
07:21 And listening to people come out of the cinema,
07:23 a lot of people have a proper emotional reaction to it.
07:26 Maybe not quite the extent that I had.
07:27 I came out of it, I read nothing about it
07:29 'cause I don't want to hear what anyone else thinks about it.
07:31 I don't want the reader of you,
07:32 even though it's had all going reviews.
07:34 I don't wanna read about anything,
07:36 any other person's attitude towards it
07:38 because how I reacted to it is deeply personal.
07:40 And yeah, I just think it's an absolutely perfect film.
07:43 So go and see "Past Lives".
07:46 It's still in cinemas.
07:47 It's gonna be in cinemas forever
07:48 because it's gonna be up for all the Oscars.
07:50 It'll come back to cinemas later on.
07:51 It's gonna be a bit like "Tar", I think.
07:53 I think it's gonna come back again and again and again.
07:55 More and more people are gonna go and see it,
07:57 even though I don't think many people have seen it so far.
07:59 So go and see "Past Lives".
08:01 I would beg you, Graham.
08:02 - Do I have to wear tweed to watch it?
08:06 - You don't.
08:07 It is not a pretentious film.
08:09 100% isn't pretentious film.
08:10 I don't think, it's also quite interesting
08:12 because when it comes to the Oscars,
08:13 you know how they sometimes do the token Oscar for film
08:17 not in the English language, I think they call it now?
08:19 I'm not sure what category it goes into
08:21 because I think it's pretty much 50% English and 50% Korean
08:24 'cause it is a film set in America for the most part,
08:27 but a lot of dialogue between Korean characters.
08:30 One of whom hasn't spoken Korean for a long time
08:32 is kind of struggling with Korean,
08:33 and we've had this quite interesting concept as well.
08:35 So I don't even know
08:36 if it would fit into that category or not.
08:37 It's kind of one of these weird films
08:39 that doesn't really fit in anywhere.
08:41 I mean, even genre-wise, it's kind of romance,
08:43 but it kind of isn't.
08:44 It's a really interesting film,
08:47 but not pretentious whatsoever.
08:49 You don't have to wear a monocle.
08:50 You don't have to come out and quote poetry after it.
08:53 It's just genuinely a very, very good film.
08:57 - I'm not sure if you're telling the truth or not.
09:00 (laughing)
09:02 So I can't remember if we, I think I did,
09:06 I mentioned "A Haunting in Venice," didn't I?
09:08 - Yes. - On our last show.
09:10 I thought so.
09:11 So yes, if you haven't seen that episode,
09:13 decent enough, would probably go and see it,
09:15 but you can probably wait
09:16 'til it comes onto Netflix or streaming.
09:18 It's not amazing.
09:19 One thing I did see,
09:20 and it was something I was really excited by,
09:22 and I'm pleased to let everyone know it didn't let me down,
09:25 kind of, not perfect,
09:28 'cause there's very few films that are perfect,
09:30 but it did a lot of good stuff, was "Dumb Money."
09:33 - Loved it, absolutely loved it.
09:34 I thought it was tremendous.
09:35 Such a good film.
09:36 - Great movie.
09:37 So for people who don't know,
09:38 we've got Paul Dano in, who is never bad.
09:42 - Never, ever bad.
09:43 I don't think he's made a bad film.
09:44 - No, right?
09:45 I think he's like, because of,
09:48 he's well-known, but because he's so good,
09:52 I feel he's kind of underrated in that sense.
09:55 But the film, for people who don't know about it,
09:57 'cause I don't think it's had that much fanfare,
09:59 and yet, kind of-
10:00 - I don't quite understand why,
10:02 'cause it seems to be a film that would be very popular.
10:05 I mean, it's a proper mainstream, fun film,
10:07 good people in it.
10:09 A bit like "The Big Short."
10:10 It's just, yeah, it's a good film.
10:12 - So basically, it's based on a true story,
10:14 almost kind of is as well.
10:16 It's not like based on it.
10:17 It's more or less a true story, if anything.
10:19 Obviously, some bits will be slightly different,
10:22 but the majority of what actually happens, 100% correct.
10:25 And it's essentially, during the pandemic,
10:28 a YouTube user, a Reddit user, called the,
10:32 oh God, what's he called again?
10:33 The what cat?
10:34 - I can't remember.
10:36 - Oh, it's gone.
10:37 But he's using him anyway.
10:39 He's a guy who has had a little bit of experience
10:42 in the stock market, I believe.
10:45 And essentially, he starts a YouTube channel
10:47 where he looks at stocks that he's interested in,
10:51 that he thinks are interesting, that are undervalued,
10:53 and he finds this stock.
10:56 This is all actually happened as well,
10:58 called GameStop, which is like PC World, essentially,
11:01 but a smaller version of Game, if you prefer, in the UK.
11:05 That isn't really doing very well.
11:07 I think it's, per share, it's about $3 something.
11:11 And he thinks it's underrated, and he's based,
11:13 he does his YouTube video where he says,
11:14 I think it's underrated, I think this is why, X, Y, and Z,
11:17 this is what people at Wall Street are not really seeing.
11:20 I'd recommend investing in this because of X, Y, and Z.
11:24 And basically, loads and loads of different people
11:26 invest in it because it gets viral,
11:29 to where it gets to the point where his shares go from
11:31 a couple of hundred pounds to all of a sudden,
11:34 he has like 53 million, I think it is.
11:37 And it's almost like overnight.
11:39 And what this basically happens is it causes
11:42 the hedge funds to basically go to the wall.
11:46 So the little people that have all invested,
11:48 have all this money, where nine times out of 10,
11:50 you just sell it 'cause you made loads of money on it.
11:52 You can pay off your mortgage,
11:53 you can pay for tuition fees, whatever it may be,
11:56 that you need, your university fees, your debts.
11:59 And throughout the film, it shows you
12:00 all these different fictional people
12:01 who I think were probably based on real people
12:03 to an extent that had made loads of money
12:06 from investing based on his advice.
12:09 But what they all do is they all hold it.
12:12 They don't sell it.
12:13 They hold it because essentially,
12:15 it's breaking down these rich,
12:16 not very kind people that I would like to be,
12:21 which is one of which is Seth Rogen,
12:23 which I find he plays really quite well
12:25 because I actually detested him in it.
12:27 Like I really detested him in it.
12:29 I was just like, I really hope he loses all of his money,
12:31 which is quite a mean thing to say,
12:32 but this guy was like profiteering off poor people.
12:35 And essentially, it's a film about that
12:37 and how it happened because of course,
12:38 the hedge funders were all,
12:40 when one person went down the drain,
12:41 they would just bail them out with their millions of pounds.
12:43 So they were thinking, can we actually beat them?
12:45 Then someone who's meant to be like in line
12:47 with the little people from Robin Hood,
12:50 of all places that it's called,
12:52 actually is in cahoots with,
12:55 cahoots, sorry, with these hedge fund people.
12:58 So they all kind of back each other up.
12:59 And it all comes out and all of a sudden,
13:01 the little people who've made all this money,
13:03 a few things go against and they all kick off.
13:05 And it's all about, it's very meme based,
13:07 which is very funny.
13:08 Like they all talk about holding,
13:09 but the spell hold wrong, it's like hodl.
13:12 You better hodl.
13:13 And it's about the little man basically,
13:15 it's David versus Goliath.
13:16 And it's really great.
13:17 And I won't spoil what happens in the end,
13:19 because obviously there is a real life thing.
13:21 I've done a little article on it,
13:23 if anyone wants to read about like what actually happened
13:25 and where the guy is at now.
13:27 But essentially he has to go to court
13:30 because they say that he's acting illegally
13:32 to be able to do this by going on YouTube,
13:33 'cause he's part of a company already
13:35 that deals in stocks and the same,
13:37 like what he's doing is illegal.
13:38 He goes to court.
13:39 There's a particular line that he says in the movie,
13:43 which is brilliant.
13:44 And he says like on all of his YouTube videos,
13:47 "Me, I'm just interested, I just like the stock.
13:50 I just like the stock."
13:51 And when he goes to court,
13:53 he gives a fantastic testament to kind of defend himself.
13:56 Again, I won't let you know if he survives
13:58 or if he goes down or if he gets court time
14:00 or whatever happens, you watch it.
14:02 I'm genuinely not gonna give it away
14:04 because it's a really interesting ending
14:06 and when you see what happens,
14:07 but he does this whole testimony.
14:09 And I thought the best line in the film was when he goes,
14:12 "Me, I just like the stock."
14:14 Like in court, live on Zoom,
14:16 'cause it's during the COVID time, which is just brilliant.
14:19 Very, very, very funny.
14:21 And correct me if I'm wrong,
14:22 I couldn't quite work this out,
14:24 but does anyone remember the viral thing
14:26 when the guy went to court
14:26 and he couldn't get the cat filter off his face
14:29 and he was in court, everyone's going to court?
14:31 Was that the same court?
14:33 Because it sort of looked like that had been the same thing
14:37 where some guy had like a cat thing on,
14:39 but I couldn't quite work it out.
14:40 But anyway-
14:41 - I think all American courts
14:42 kind of look the same, to be honest.
14:43 - It was very funny
14:44 'cause it's all based around Zoom as well.
14:46 So it's all kind of through the digital age
14:48 because it was during the COVID time that this happened.
14:50 So he goes to court on Zoom
14:51 and he's doing the whole thing in his YouTube room
14:53 and things like that.
14:54 And it's very, very funny
14:55 because it's basically, look,
14:56 unless you're like a super rich person
14:58 and a bit of an a-hole, if I can say,
15:00 that likes draining cash from people who have none of it,
15:05 then you're going to like the film
15:06 because it's basically "Little Man vs. Big Man"
15:08 and the little man wins for quite a lot of the movie.
15:10 I won't tell you what happens at the end.
15:11 Does the little man win?
15:12 Does the big man win?
15:14 It could be either.
15:14 Let's be honest, I'm not going to spit it either way.
15:16 Just watch it.
15:17 But very, very good film.
15:19 I thought it was very, very similar
15:21 if you're a fan of "The Social Network."
15:24 - Yeah, it was.
15:25 - I thought it was a great film.
15:28 And I know a lot of people went,
15:29 "Oh, why do I want to watch a film about Facebook?"
15:32 Well, if you haven't seen it,
15:33 it's because David Fincher's directed it
15:34 and Jesse Eisenberg's the main character in it.
15:36 And also, oh God, his name's gone out of my head.
15:40 Spider-Man, oh God, what did he play again?
15:41 Damn, great looking guy.
15:44 Andrew Garfield.
15:48 Yes, is also in the movie as a younger character.
15:52 And that's a fantastic movie.
15:54 One of my favorite films ever seen at the cinema four times
15:56 'cause it's so good.
15:57 I don't care that it's about Facebook.
15:58 It's about the morals of the people
16:01 and the things that people do for money
16:03 and the things that they'll overlook
16:04 and the things that they won't overlook
16:05 and the kind of battle between good and evil.
16:07 And this is really similar.
16:09 And I thought "Dumb Money" was absolutely classic.
16:11 - I do, I do.
16:13 Also, if you enjoy "The Social Network,"
16:15 a film that's coming out, "Blackberry,"
16:17 which is on at Glasgow Film Festival,
16:19 I think that's out next week.
16:20 And that's a similar thing to "Social Network,"
16:22 but it's obviously about the inventor of the Blackberry
16:24 instead of the inventor about Facebook.
16:26 But actually, "Blackberry" is kind of similar
16:28 to both these films as well.
16:29 And it's dead funny.
16:30 It takes like a really weird true story
16:33 because I didn't really know that much
16:34 by the GameStop thing.
16:35 I was vaguely aware of the story,
16:38 but like you say, I didn't know what happened in the end.
16:40 And it's really tense to see all these people
16:41 'cause a lot of the people you see who have invested
16:43 are just normal people.
16:44 They're like nurses or whatever else.
16:46 And they're normal people.
16:47 And this is proper life-changing money.
16:49 But in order to make that money,
16:50 they need to gamble and need to hold onto it.
16:52 So I was really tense all the way through
16:53 'cause like you say, I had no idea
16:55 if they were gonna come out up, down, or evens,
16:57 and you would not want to spoil that
16:58 'cause it lasts like 40 minutes of the film.
17:00 It's quite tense, but you just hope that they win.
17:02 'Cause like you say, the big men in it are just horrible.
17:05 They're horrible, horrible people who don't even work.
17:07 And they just do nothing.
17:10 They just have parties,
17:12 and this money's being made for them.
17:14 It's not like they're talented, intelligent, or work hard.
17:16 They're just awful, awful people who've got lots of money
17:19 and can turn it into more money.
17:21 So yeah, it's a good film, totally agree.
17:22 Really enjoyed it.
17:23 - Yeah, I thought it was great.
17:24 I give it an eight.
17:25 So I'll continue with it.
17:29 But that's kind of all it seemed.
17:31 'Cause I've explained Houghton and Venice,
17:33 so, and I've been away on holiday,
17:35 as I tend to be doing quite a lot recently,
17:36 which is good fun.
17:38 But I think moving forward, we'll be looking at,
17:41 obviously, "The Exorcist Believers" coming out this week,
17:43 which is either gonna be great or horrendous.
17:46 And I'm kind of excited to see which avenue it goes down.
17:49 As long as it has a really quotable line in it,
17:51 like the original "Exorcist" in '74, then I'm quite happy.
17:55 But topic of the week,
17:56 I've gone down the comedy route for this,
17:59 so don't take anything I say
18:00 from this point forward seriously.
18:02 But the greatest movie heroes ever.
18:04 We always pick a top three from three to one.
18:06 I've been going first.
18:07 I'm gonna let you go first.
18:09 Who's your number three, top three heroes of all time?
18:12 - Well, I'm pleased you've gone, Fanny,
18:13 'cause I've just gone,
18:14 I had a good old think about this,
18:16 and I was trying to come up with clever answers,
18:18 whatever else, but there's some classic movie heroes
18:21 and they're classics for a reason.
18:23 So in no particular order, I couldn't split these,
18:26 but my first one's Harry Callaghan
18:28 out of the "Dirty Harry" films.
18:29 I was obsessed with "Dirty Harry" when I was young.
18:32 Like I could quote all the lines back at you.
18:34 All five of the films are really, really good.
18:38 I don't think any of them,
18:38 I think maybe "Sudden Impact" is the weakest of the five,
18:41 but for those who don't know,
18:42 "Dirty Harry" is a kind of rogue cop
18:45 played by Clint Eastwood,
18:46 who does very bad things to get people to justice.
18:50 So he's kind of an anti-hero,
18:52 but he's probably scuzzy.
18:53 He's not quite up there with bad lieutenant,
18:55 Harvey Keitel's bad lieutenant,
18:56 but he's kind of getting there.
18:58 Like he really pushes boundaries
19:01 and he doesn't care what those fat cats at City Hall
19:04 have to say about it.
19:04 He's gonna bring the criminals in, doing whatever he can.
19:08 It's the great line, "Do you feel lucky, punk?"
19:11 Well, do you?
19:12 Classic line.
19:13 That, that gun, just the look on his face,
19:16 the grimace on his face.
19:17 It's just brilliant.
19:18 Anyone who hasn't seen the "Dirty Harry" films,
19:19 because actually they've gone out of style a wee bit.
19:21 And you don't often see them on telly anymore.
19:22 You kind of have to get them on the DVD.
19:24 I presume they're on one of the streaming services,
19:26 but people don't really talk about "Dirty Harry" that much.
19:27 So for anyone who hasn't,
19:29 start with the first film, "Dirty Harry,"
19:31 which is kind of loosely based on the Zodiac Killer,
19:33 which I think we're both kind of obsessed with,
19:35 the Zodiac Killer.
19:35 It's a great, great serial killer story,
19:37 which has been redone many times,
19:38 but it's based on that and it's great.
19:40 And then just go on from there.
19:42 All good.
19:42 "Dirty Harry Callaghan" is my first hero.
19:45 - Mine is...
19:50 - Oh dear.
19:51 - This is half serious.
19:53 I've basically done it really quick
19:55 and then went, "Ha, wouldn't this be funny?"
19:58 Russell Crowe and Gladiator.
20:01 - Oh, there's nothing wrong with that.
20:02 What a great hero.
20:03 My name is, I can't do the speech.
20:05 I'd love to be able to do the speech, but I can't.
20:06 My name is-
20:07 - My name is Matt Moriarty Smith Smith Smith Smith Smith.
20:09 Jones Smith Steve.
20:11 - Hands through corn, hands through corn, hands through corn.
20:14 - I love the line.
20:17 And I think people haven't quite realized
20:20 how iconic it's become.
20:22 'Cause back in the day, so I used to be in a band
20:27 and I used to be energetic.
20:30 And there was one point where I got a crowd
20:31 that was really like, not really, A, not into it,
20:34 B, kind of like, what is he doing?
20:37 And I did the, "Are you not entertained?"
20:40 (laughing)
20:42 Half got it and some of us didn't.
20:43 But now it has become a thing where I think people do it.
20:46 "Are you not entertained?"
20:47 And I think it's because it went onto Netflix recently
20:50 over the past six months to a year.
20:53 But this one's semi-serious
20:55 because I think Gladiator is a really good film.
20:57 There's a second Gladiator coming out next month.
20:59 And of course I'm from Sunderland slash lived my life
21:03 in South Shields, Ridley Scott, of course,
21:04 is from South Shields.
21:06 The only famous person alongside Joe McElroy
21:09 of X-Factor slash pop star fame from South Shields.
21:12 - It's a lot of him.
21:12 (laughing)
21:13 - And also actually two members of Little Mix,
21:16 but I don't like to brag.
21:18 I had nothing to do with any of these people's successes
21:20 for a disclaimer.
21:22 But Gladiator is a great movie.
21:23 And I think the recent TikTok trend
21:28 of how often do you think about the Roman Empire,
21:31 especially when you're asking towards men,
21:33 the reason we're answering once a week
21:34 or every time in a couple of days, because of Gladiator.
21:37 - You sing like Russell Crowe.
21:39 - 'Cause you just have Russell Crowe on the brain
21:41 all the time ever since the movie came out.
21:42 But a great film acted superbly by Russell Crowe,
21:45 another underrated actor that I think people think
21:47 is a bit daft and he's not, he's very, very good.
21:50 And there's a reason he's been Oscar nominated
21:51 so many times.
21:52 And I think Oscar winning, I think,
21:53 for A Beautiful Mind, I think.
21:55 - I think that's right, yeah.
21:56 - But just a great film, a story of true vengeance.
22:00 I was gonna put Mandy in here with Nick Cage,
22:02 but I'm not funny 'cause I always choose Mandy.
22:04 But a story of like salvation
22:07 and just the little man versus the big man.
22:09 And you know what I like?
22:11 When the little man beats the big man.
22:13 However, I do quite like Joaquin Phoenix,
22:15 but in this movie, pain in the bum.
22:18 - I was gonna say though, I think to have a really good hero
22:21 you need a really good villain, don't you?
22:22 And Joaquin Phoenix, we did best movie villains.
22:25 Yeah, we missed him out.
22:27 I don't know why we missed him out.
22:27 He is absolutely fantastic in the film.
22:30 He's so damaged as well.
22:31 And there's so many good lines.
22:32 - I mean, father to a murderer, whatever it is.
22:36 I don't know the lines,
22:37 but they're all bloody wonderful, aren't they?
22:38 - Father to a murdered daughter,
22:39 but a man that's mostly made of shit.
22:41 (indistinct)
22:43 - Yes, that's exactly what he says.
22:46 I was in, funnily enough,
22:47 like we were saying at the start of the show,
22:48 I was in Tuscany this weekend on a really lovely press trip
22:52 at a fantastic place called the La Massa.
22:55 And the Italians thought it was hilarious
22:56 that English men and Scottish men
22:58 and British men in general think of the Russian,
23:02 sorry, the Roman empire so often.
23:05 'Cause Italian men do not, apparently.
23:10 - No, I mean, it's also,
23:11 I think they mainly think about pasta and vespas.
23:14 - It's a British thing.
23:16 (laughing)
23:17 - Who's your second choice?
23:19 - Okay, I mean, this is so boring.
23:20 This is probably the most boring choice
23:22 I've made in any of these ones.
23:23 I'm going for James Bond,
23:24 just because I know, I know,
23:27 but James Bond, 27 films, 25 in the official thing.
23:31 And you know what?
23:32 They're mainly really, really good.
23:34 I mean, "Doctor No" was first one.
23:35 That's absolutely brilliant.
23:36 "No Time to Die," the last one,
23:37 I think is one of the best James Bond films.
23:39 I will still not spoil what happens in the end
23:41 of "No Time to Die,"
23:42 but it's genuinely a wonderful, wonderful ending of a film.
23:46 And yeah, I grew up with James Bond
23:48 when we first got a video player.
23:51 We had a Betamax video recorder.
23:53 I used to record them off the telly whenever they came on.
23:56 It's awful to say it,
23:57 Roger Moore was my favorite James Bond.
23:59 I know Sean Connery's better.
24:00 I know his films are better,
24:02 but when I was a kid, I just wanted to be Roger Moore.
24:04 He was so cool and his wee winks and everything, fabulous.
24:08 And I think that really the series,
24:10 it's went through some tough times,
24:12 like 10 years ago, but it's come back.
24:15 And I'm really looking forward
24:15 to seeing what they do with it next.
24:17 I don't think they've made many wrong steps
24:19 and just so many iconic scenes, so many iconic storylines,
24:22 so many iconic actors and actresses involved.
24:25 And James Bond is kind of,
24:26 he can be a superhero for anybody, really.
24:29 He can change with the times
24:31 and he could be a woman at some point, who knows?
24:34 He might be black in his next generation.
24:36 We'll see.
24:37 Someone like Lawrence Fox would be very upset about that,
24:39 but I would not be.
24:40 He can be anybody or anything
24:42 'cause James Bond is all of us, Graham.
24:44 James Bond is all of us.
24:46 - I don't like James Bond,
24:47 but one thing I did like this week,
24:48 and I'm pleased you mentioned about it,
24:50 potentially being a woman or potentially being
24:51 like a black man or changing gender, whatever it may be.
24:55 - Yeah, that's what I was.
24:56 - Something we haven't seen in the past,
24:57 which I would think is really great.
25:00 So Piers Morgan tweeted,
25:03 or he said, "If the next James Bond is transgender,
25:06 he will seriously consider killing himself."
25:09 - Well, let's just push him on there.
25:12 - Well, what,
25:13 not that I would advocate that at all,
25:17 but I found Ron Perlman,
25:18 who obviously people will know from "Hellboy."
25:22 What I will say is that he quote tweeted that piece
25:25 and put something along the lines of,
25:27 "He is hoping or wishing,"
25:29 I can't quite remember what he said,
25:31 but he indicated that he's not a fan of Piers Morgan.
25:34 Now, I will not advocate, obviously, him killing himself.
25:38 I do think the fact that he feels that way
25:40 over someone potentially being a transgender actor
25:42 in James Bond is just twaddle.
25:44 - It's absolutely pathetic.
25:46 James Bond can be he, she, they, it does not matter.
25:50 The fact is that James Bond can be anything and anyone.
25:53 - Exactamundo, the whole point of it,
25:56 you doofus.
25:57 My second is Nick Cage, of course,
26:00 but not from "Mandy," from "Willy's Wonderland."
26:03 - (laughs) That's a curveball.
26:05 That's a curveball.
26:07 - And Nick Cage comes in swinging,
26:09 or is it John Travolta?
26:11 No, it's Nick Cage from "Willy's Wonderland."
26:12 - I love that out of all of the action films he's done,
26:15 he's played all like Poole, Arkin,
26:17 and all these amazing action heroes.
26:19 "Willy's Wonderland," absolutely.
26:22 - He doesn't even speak,
26:23 and he beats up toys that are haunted by demons.
26:26 - Amazing.
26:27 - I don't really know if I have to say much more about it,
26:31 but "Willy's Wonderland" is great.
26:32 Nick Cage doesn't speak in it at all.
26:33 He just does this.
26:34 (imitates cage growling)
26:38 Throughout the movie,
26:39 and that's what makes him almost the best hero of all time.
26:44 It's a great movie.
26:44 He doesn't speak during it at all.
26:46 He just does cage as cage.
26:48 He beats up cuddly toys that are possessed by demons
26:50 in a fairground,
26:51 and if you don't think that's heroic,
26:53 then that's your problem, not mine.
26:55 (Nick laughs)
26:56 - That's an inspired choice.
26:58 Well, my final choice is,
26:59 oh, wait a second.
27:00 (Nick screams)
27:02 Who's gonna help me, Graham?
27:03 Who's gonna help me?
27:04 Ellen Ripley's gonna help me get rid of this face hugger.
27:07 Ellen Ripley out of "Alien" is...
27:10 I'm sorry, I'm sorry.
27:11 I had to bring face hugger into it.
27:14 She is an absolutely iconic,
27:16 (Nick screams)
27:17 an absolutely iconic movie hero
27:20 in every way.
27:21 When she made the original "Alien,"
27:24 you didn't get many female heroes,
27:26 is the honest truth,
27:28 and she created this character,
27:31 I mean, genuinely created,
27:32 no one else could have played Ellen Ripley
27:34 other than Sigourney Weaver.
27:36 I think she's been in four of the films,
27:38 and definitely the best of the four.
27:40 You can't really make an "Alien" film without Ellen Ripley
27:43 and without Sigourney Weaver.
27:44 There's very little else to say about her.
27:46 She just kicks ass.
27:47 Can I say ass?
27:48 I can say ass.
27:49 She just kicks alien ass all the way through.
27:52 She's incredibly brave.
27:53 She's incredibly noble.
27:55 She is just a wonderful, wonderful character
27:58 in every single way.
27:59 And apparently there was going to be another "Alien" film,
28:02 which I just found out today,
28:05 that apparently your man who played,
28:06 who made "District 9," Neil Blomkamp?
28:10 - Neil Blomkamp, yeah.
28:11 - He was apparently signed up to do a new "Alien" film,
28:14 and apparently Sigourney Weaver signed up to do it as well.
28:17 But apparently it's all gone horribly wrong now.
28:19 The script is out there.
28:20 I think it's funding issues
28:22 or something happened in development,
28:25 so it's not happening right now,
28:26 but I'd love to see it.
28:27 - No, I don't.
28:28 I love "District 9."
28:30 I do not like anything Blomkamp's done since.
28:31 I think "Chappy" might be one of the worst films
28:33 I've ever seen in my life.
28:35 - That was bad, yeah.
28:36 - Oh.
28:37 The basic, the Antivote film, essentially, as it was.
28:41 - He made a stupid film,
28:42 and then maybe it was just fluke, I suppose,
28:44 that he made that one,
28:45 'cause it's a tremendous film, but-
28:46 - "District 9" was amazing,
28:47 but "Elysium" was by the-
28:50 - It was awful.
28:51 - Yeah, it wasn't great.
28:53 I just kept looking at Matt Damon,
28:55 being like, "He looks terrible with his skin on."
28:57 That's kind of the whole thing.
28:59 But my number one
29:00 film hero of all time-
29:06 - A no.
29:07 - Is the one, "The O.N.A."
29:10 Russell Crowe.
29:11 - Yes.
29:12 - In "The Pope's Exorcist."
29:13 - Yes!
29:14 - Yes!
29:15 (both laughing)
29:18 - And rightly so.
29:19 - Because it's great,
29:20 because he rides a Vespa all the way from Rome
29:22 to Spain in 20 minutes,
29:24 and tell me a hero, James Bond included,
29:26 that can do that.
29:27 They can't.
29:28 They can't do it.
29:29 There's not one single hero that we've mentioned,
29:31 or could mention, that will get from Rome,
29:34 or the Vatican, specifically, to Spain.
29:36 Also, how many of our heroes have backchatted
29:40 to the Pope's mates?
29:42 (laughing)
29:43 They're trying to attack him,
29:44 and he's like, "Nah, I'm the Pope's exorcist, pal.
29:48 "Like, I'm riding Vespas from Rome all the way to Spain.
29:51 "No chance are you sacking me,
29:53 "because I can do, since you said it,
29:56 "kick-ass exorcisms in only the way that Russell Crowe can."
30:01 And the more I think about it,
30:02 I said it was a comedy thing.
30:03 I think I believe in this choice.
30:05 I think-
30:06 - I think so.
30:07 I think that there's gonna be another, like,
30:08 10 installments, and I think in 20 years' time,
30:10 it's gonna be seen to be
30:11 the greatest movie franchise of all time.
30:13 And we'll be right in there at the bottom level.
30:15 We'll have told everybody.
30:17 - We started.
30:19 - We did start it.
30:19 It is now the,
30:21 it is the 36th most profitable film of the year now,
30:25 Pope's Exorcist.
30:26 It's done six copies.
30:28 It's pretty good.
30:29 - It should be better.
30:31 - I mean, it's not Barbieheimer,
30:32 but it's getting up there.
30:34 - No, but I mean, if we're being honest,
30:36 it's better than both together combined.
30:37 (laughing)
30:38 - Obviously.
30:39 - It's the opposite of the feminist Barbie
30:44 that men can just ride motorcycles really fast.
30:47 - Finally, finally a film that does that.
30:50 Finally.
30:51 - The patriarchy was never about horses.
30:53 It was about this.
30:54 - I mean, you're so angry when the Oscars overlook it,
30:57 'cause they're going to overlook it, aren't they?
30:58 It's awful.
30:59 - Yes.
31:00 And if you haven't seen the Pope's Exorcist,
31:02 which we say in every episode, just watch it.
31:05 Like, it's a great film.
31:07 It's genuinely entertaining.
31:09 One of the most entertaining films of the year.
31:12 Right up there with Barbie and Oppenheimer.
31:14 Yes, very different,
31:15 but it does exactly what it says in the tin.
31:17 It's lethal weapon with priests.
31:19 - Amazing.
31:20 - And that is the best way to sum it up.
31:22 But Dave, thanks for joining me this week.
31:25 - Thank you.
31:26 The joy is evergreen.
31:27 - Lots of things to go and see in the cinema this week.
31:29 I will check my application for the Cineworld app,
31:33 just to see what we've got coming.
31:35 - I would say, if you've never seen it,
31:37 go and see Stop Making Sense,
31:38 the Talking Heads film about their concert,
31:42 their classic concert.
31:43 It's the best concert film of all time.
31:45 And I'm going to see it tonight.
31:46 I'm very much looking forward to seeing it on the big screen.
31:48 - And also, most importantly,
31:50 Paw Patrol, the Mighty Movie, is out in 10 days.
31:53 - Yes, I'm looking forward to that.
31:55 - Killers of the Flower Moon is out in 17 days.
31:58 - Very exciting, yes.
32:00 - Most importantly, Trolls 3 is out also in 17 days,
32:03 on the same day, which I'm sure will rival.
32:05 Blackberry, as you say, is out in three days.
32:07 It is showing in Cineworld.
32:09 We have, which we already mentioned,
32:12 The Exorcist, Believer, and the new Michael Caine film,
32:15 The Great Escaper.
32:16 I have no idea what it's about.
32:18 - That's a good one.
32:19 - It's probably terrible,
32:21 but sorry about saying that, Michael.
32:23 I could be wrong.
32:23 I haven't seen it.
32:24 Don't listen to anything I say.
32:26 And if you are very excited about Halloween coming up,
32:31 there is also Hellraiser is playing
32:34 in a 4K restoration at Cineworld
32:37 over the next sort of few weeks.
32:39 I can't remember the date, but yes, we're seeing.
32:41 So yes, plenty of things to see.
32:44 Halloween's coming up.
32:44 Horror's gonna be, go see The Pope's Exorcist.
32:48 Watch Willy's Wonderland.
32:50 You don't need to see Alien again.
32:51 You've seen it a million times.
32:52 Watch The Pope's Exorcist.
32:54 Thanks for joining me this week, Dave.
32:56 - Thank you, Graham.
32:56 Bye.
32:57 (upbeat music)
33:00 (upbeat music)