15 Laws of Life That Turn a Boy Into a Man
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00:00 One, stop hoping for a completion of anything in life.
00:05 Most men make the error of thinking
00:08 that one day it will be done.
00:10 They think, if I can work enough, then one day I could rest.
00:14 Or, one day, my woman will understand something
00:18 and then she will stop complaining.
00:20 Or, I'm only doing this now so that one day
00:25 I can do what I really want with my life.
00:28 The masculine error is to think that, eventually,
00:31 things will be different in some way.
00:34 They won't.
00:36 It never ends.
00:37 As long as life goes on, man needs to learn
00:40 to feel the present moment
00:42 and not hope for an unknown future.
00:44 The challenge is to tussle, play,
00:48 and make love with the present moment.
00:50 Two, never change your mind just to please a woman.
00:58 If a woman suggests something
00:59 that changes a man's perspective,
01:02 then he should make a new decision
01:04 based on his new perspective.
01:06 But he should never betray his own knowledge
01:08 and intuition in order to please his woman
01:11 or go along with her.
01:14 Such an action will weaken both her and him.
01:17 They will grow to resent each other
01:20 and the crust of accumulated inauthenticity
01:24 will burden their love as well as their capacity
01:26 for free action.
01:28 Three, don't get lost in tasks and duties.
01:33 Whatever the specifics of a man's purpose,
01:37 he must constantly remind himself
01:39 of the danger of losing himself
01:41 in an endless list of tasks
01:44 and refresh the spiritual aspect of his life
01:47 through regular meditation and retreat.
01:49 Otherwise, he risks becoming a mere mechanical performer
01:54 of duties and routine,
01:56 which leads to a loss of meaning,
01:59 where inner freedom suffers.
02:01 A man must be able to stop, find internal depth,
02:06 and direct his attention to the essence,
02:09 not just superficial tasks.
02:11 Four, your purpose must come before your relationship.
02:18 Every man knows that his highest purpose in life
02:22 cannot be reduced to any particular relationship.
02:26 If a man prioritizes his relationship
02:29 over his highest purpose,
02:31 he weakens himself,
02:32 disserves the universe,
02:34 and cheats his woman of an authentic man
02:37 who can offer her full, undivided presence.
02:40 Five, live as if your father had died.
02:46 A man should love his father,
02:49 but be free from expectations and criticism from him.
02:53 A man needs to grow out of his shadow,
02:55 become himself,
02:57 and take responsibility for his decisions and actions
03:01 in order to be a free man.
03:03 Six, what she wants is not what she says.
03:11 Sometimes a woman will request her man in plain English
03:15 not to get him to do something,
03:18 but to see if he is so weak that he will do it.
03:22 In other words, she is testing his capacity
03:25 to do what is right,
03:27 not what she is asking for.
03:28 In such cases, if the man does what his woman asks,
03:34 she will be disappointed and angry.
03:36 The man will have no idea why she is so angry
03:41 or what could possibly please her.
03:44 He must remember that her trust is earned
03:47 not by him fulfilling her requests,
03:50 but by him magnifying love, consciousness,
03:54 and success in their lives in spite of her requests.
03:58 Seven, lean just beyond your edge.
04:05 At any given moment, a man's growth is optimized
04:09 if he leans just beyond his edge, capacity, and fear.
04:15 He should not be too lazy, happily stagnating
04:17 in the zone of security and comfort,
04:20 nor should he push far beyond his edge,
04:24 stressing himself unnecessarily,
04:27 unable to metabolize his experience.
04:30 He should lean just slightly beyond the edge of fear
04:34 and discomfort constantly in everything he does.
04:39 It is a process of self-discovery
04:42 where a man finds strength and wisdom in his own essence
04:45 and unlocks potential he had never even imagined.
04:49 Eight, trust nobody.
04:55 A man must be prudent, vigilant,
04:58 and able to recognize true intentions
05:00 before placing his faith.
05:02 Trusting someone blindly often leads
05:05 to disappointment and betrayal.
05:07 It does not mean completely isolating himself
05:10 or becoming cynical, but rather learning
05:14 to trust his own instincts and judgments.
05:17 It's about discerning who and what deserves his trust
05:21 and taking responsibility for his decisions.
05:24 Trust is earned, not given.
05:26 Nine, be willing to change everything in your life.
05:35 A man must be ready to dedicate everything to his purpose,
05:39 face or resolve the consequences of his past actions,
05:43 and then be willing to move on
05:45 from this particular way of life.
05:47 He must be capable of entering a period of uncertainty,
05:52 not knowing what to do with his life,
05:55 and waiting for a vision or a new form of purpose to emerge.
05:59 These cycles of specific action,
06:03 followed by periods of not knowing
06:05 what the hell is going on,
06:07 are natural for a man who is shedding layers of karma
06:11 on the way to realizing his potential.
06:13 10, she doesn't really want to be number one.
06:21 A woman sometimes seems to want to be
06:25 the most important thing in her man's life.
06:28 However, if she is the most important thing,
06:32 she feels her man has made her the number one priority
06:35 and is not fully dedicated or directed
06:38 to divine growth and service.
06:40 She will feel her man's dependence on her for his happiness,
06:45 and this will make her feel smothered
06:48 by his neediness and clinging.
06:50 A woman really wants her man to be totally dedicated
06:54 to his highest purpose and also to love her fully.
06:58 Although she would never admit it,
07:01 she wants to feel that her man would be willing
07:03 to sacrifice their relationship
07:05 for the sake of his highest purpose.
07:07 11, don't use your family as an excuse.
07:14 If a man never discovers his deepest purpose,
07:18 or if he permanently compromises
07:20 and uses his family as an excuse for doing so,
07:23 then his core and masculinity become weakened.
07:26 His woman loses trust in sexual polarity with him,
07:31 even though he may be putting much energy
07:34 into parenting and housework.
07:36 A man should, of course, be a full participant
07:41 in caring for children and the household.
07:44 But if he gives up his deepest purpose to do so,
07:47 ultimately everyone suffers.
07:49 12, don't ever chase after someone.
07:55 A man who constantly chases someone
07:59 often ends up with compromises and dependence,
08:02 which robs him of the freedom to be himself.
08:05 By pursuing someone and begging for attention,
08:09 a man diminishes his own value,
08:12 leading to a loss of self-worth.
08:14 True self-worth is found
08:17 when he starts prioritizing himself,
08:19 understands his own needs and values,
08:22 builds his life based on his beliefs,
08:25 and directs time and energy towards self-improvement.
08:31 13, you don't have to please everyone.
08:35 People like it when others give them positive feedback
08:40 and approve of their actions.
08:42 In reality, pleasing and trying to make everyone happy
08:46 only makes a man's life miserable
08:48 and attracts people who only want to use him
08:51 because they know that they will always
08:53 put their needs ahead of his own.
08:56 Everyone has things that they consider important to them.
09:00 If a man doesn't take time to determine
09:02 what is important to his life,
09:05 he will easily find himself swayed
09:07 to focus on what is important to others.
09:10 If we try to please everyone,
09:13 we will end up pleasing no one.
09:15 14, if you don't know your purpose, discover it now.
09:22 Without a conscious life purpose,
09:25 a man is totally lost,
09:27 drifting, adapting to events rather than creating events.
09:32 Without knowing his life purpose,
09:34 a man lives a weakened, impotent existence,
09:38 perhaps eventually becoming even sexually impotent.
09:42 In the end, he becomes a passive observer of his own life,
09:47 plunges into a deep emptiness,
09:49 and loses the ability to self-realization and inner growth.
09:55 15, nobody is coming to save you.
09:58 A man must learn to save himself,
10:02 and it has nothing to do with whether people like him or not.
10:06 They have their own lives to live.
10:08 One must come to terms with this and learn to live with it.
10:12 People will move in and out of his life,
10:16 and if he depends on them, he will be disappointed.
10:19 A man should be responsible for his own life.
10:23 Eventually, the best way to get your life
10:26 to where you want it to be
10:28 is to take control of your own destiny.
10:30 (soft music)
10:34 (soft music)
10:36 (music fades)
10:38 you