Goofy-Hockey Homicide
Transcript
00:00 (claps)
00:02 ♪ (theme music)
00:07 ♪ (theme music)
00:28 - Well ladies and gentlemen, here we are out at the
00:30 Elite Deluxe Sports Palace about to witness
00:32 one of the biggest ice hockey games of the season.
00:34 Bringing together two of the top ranking teams in the league.
00:37 In no other game is the feeling of competition so keen,
00:40 affecting both players and spectators alike.
00:42 Turning casual friends into bitter enemies.
00:46 Tonight's game looks like a sellout.
00:48 A capacity crowd of thousands of rabid,
00:50 sports-loving hockey fans has turned out
00:51 to cheer for their favorite teams.
00:53 Yes sir, the stands are filling up.
00:56 They're really packing them in.
00:57 Well it seems there have been a few last minute changes
01:00 in the starting liners.
01:01 Get your pencils ready...now!
01:03 Instead of Hannah at left wing,
01:04 Strawlings will start.
01:05 Put DeGradi in place of Williams at center,
01:07 then Berg over Aliquis,
01:08 and at left defense, McCormick replaces Dunham.
01:10 At goal, Lee Angan takes the place of Nichols,
01:11 and...oh yes, the teams will be the Looseleafs
01:14 versus the Anteaters instead of the Moose and Pelicans.
01:17 All right, the teams are skating out onto the ice.
01:20 Listen to that ovation!
01:22 (crowd cheering)
01:26 And here come the two stars of their teams,
01:28 Icebox Bertino and Fearless Ferguson.
01:31 A heated rivalry has developed between these two boys.
01:34 Both are tied for the top league scoring honors,
01:37 and tonight's game will be the payoff.
01:39 As these boys go, so go their clubs.
01:42 The referee for tonight will be that popular arbiter,
01:44 Clean Game Kinney.
01:45 (crowd cheering)
01:49 A favorite of the fans.
01:51 The entire responsibility of the game
01:53 rests squarely on the shoulders of the referee.
01:55 This keen-eyed individual must follow the course of play
01:58 so closely that sometimes it seems he must have eyes
02:01 in the back of his head.
02:03 (coughing)
02:07 Uh-oh, a penalty!
02:09 There go the guilty players into the penalty box.
02:12 With these stars out, the complexion of the entire game
02:15 may be changed.
02:16 A hush of expectancy settles over the crowd
02:18 as the teams line up for the face-off.
02:20 The referee drops the puck, and the game is on!
02:23 Ferguson's puck over the blue line
02:25 passed out to the right wing,
02:26 checked by the opposing left wing,
02:27 who passes the puck back to the right defense,
02:28 cutting in fast, picking the puck off the board,
02:29 now back to the left wing, and pivots around the center!
02:31 There's a scramble for Ferguson!
02:33 (crowd booing)
02:37 Boots has got it, he's down the ice,
02:39 ties for a shot at the net,
02:40 but the goalie puts up a stout defense,
02:42 knocking it away for a beautiful save!
02:45 (crowd cheering)
02:47 Here comes Colum Negrete fighting for the puck,
02:49 there's the shot, and he scores!
02:51 No, no, no, look at that stop!
02:53 Nothing ever gets past that goalie!
02:56 (crowd cheering)
03:00 (puck whistling)
03:01 (crowd booing)
03:03 Murray Boots has cleared down the rink,
03:04 it's taken by McCormick, McCormick to Papineau
03:06 at the blue line, over to Murray,
03:07 Murray cutting over the loose leaf defense,
03:08 he tries to draw the goalie out of position,
03:09 there's the shot, and, and, and, and...
03:12 (crowd cheering)
03:17 (puck whistling)
03:20 (crowd cheering)
03:23 Nice save, fellow!
03:24 (puck whistling)
03:26 (crowd cheering)
03:32 - What am I saying?
03:34 (puck whistling)
03:35 - Puck shoots out to center right,
03:36 both teams are battling fiercely for possession,
03:39 here come Bertino and Ferguson out of the penalty box.
03:41 (puck whistling)
03:42 (puck whistling)
03:43 (puck whistling)
03:44 (puck whistling)
03:46 (puck whistling)
03:47 And, there go Bertino and Ferguson
03:49 back into the penalty box.
03:51 The loose leafs take the play away,
03:53 now they can pass on the right wing,
03:54 center right, oh, a lovely snag to puck
03:56 and a beautiful puck check at the end.
03:58 There's a long pass rink wide,
03:59 and a scramble for the puck,
04:00 a little rough play out there,
04:01 both sides are trying to score, and...
04:03 (buzzer)
04:04 And there's the buzzer ending the first period.
04:06 (buzzer)
04:09 In order to give the cash customers
04:11 a chance to sit in their seats,
04:13 there are 10 minute refs between periods.
04:16 ♪
04:21 (whistle)
04:26 (buzzer)
04:28 Well, there's the buzzer, starting the second stanza.
04:32 (whistle)
04:34 The team takes to the ice,
04:35 puck is faced off, there's a pass out to the side,
04:37 the loose leafs come up with the play,
04:38 here comes McCormick, cutting down the side,
04:40 that boy's sure burning up the ice.
04:43 Spinning like a top, he crosses the blue line,
04:44 the defense closes in, wow!
04:47 Lee Breedley laid it into him!
04:49 (crowd cheering)
04:54 - Hooray for Raleigh!
04:55 (crowd cheering)
04:59 - Here come Bertino and Ferguson out of the penalty box.
05:01 (puck smacking)
05:02 - Oh wow!
05:03 (puck smacking)
05:05 (whistle)
05:06 - And there go Bertino and Ferguson
05:08 back into the penalty box.
05:09 There's a pass out to Bond,
05:10 and here he comes swinging wide
05:11 with a blinding burst of speed.
05:13 (crowd cheering)
05:14 - Next up is Bond, sliced his way through.
05:16 Puck cuts in fast, picks up the puck,
05:18 takes a shot at the net, and the goalie kicks it away!
05:20 There's another shot, and another, and another!
05:22 The goalie has the situation well in hand.
05:24 No, no!
05:25 He nuts the O-net for a score!
05:27 A score, a score, a score, a score!
05:29 (crowd cheering)
05:33 - Hand-eaters won, loose leafs nothing.
05:35 Well ladies and gentlemen, that score might be enough
05:37 to put the game on ice.
05:39 They line up for the face-off.
05:40 (crowd cheering)
05:43 (dramatic music)
05:45 - There's a scramble,
05:46 puck is forced to the other side.
05:48 (crowd cheering)
05:51 Here come Bertino and Ferguson out of the penalty box.
05:54 (puck smacking)
05:55 (grunting)
05:57 And there go Bertino and Ferguson
05:59 back into the penalty box.
06:01 Coming up to the blue line, it's--
06:02 (whistle)
06:03 Oh!
06:04 He's right down the field trying to knock the count.
06:05 (buzzer)
06:06 And the goalie boots it away for Ferguson's sake!
06:09 And the crowd loses its mind!
06:11 (crowd cheering)
06:14 Here's the play.
06:15 Mohawk pro-checks it away from Williams,
06:16 intercepted by Shaw,
06:17 passed behind to Allen, goes to Slip to DePete,
06:18 and there it goes right, right down the middle.
06:19 He shoots!
06:21 The referee's in the way!
06:22 There's another nice save at the net.
06:23 He clears the puck from the front,
06:25 but it's too hot to handle.
06:26 Now both teams are fighting it out on the ice.
06:27 This is anybody's game!
06:28 Riley shoots, McCormick shoots,
06:30 Bird shoots, Pugley shoots, Weaver shoots,
06:31 DeGradi shoots, Self shoots, Nolley shoots,
06:33 Bushman shoots, Larkin shoots, everybody shoots!
06:35 There's a score, and another, and another, and another!
06:37 The goalie's just standing there ground,
06:39 and gets a handful.
06:40 It's a three-scoring game!
06:41 Shaw is shooting, Moore is shooting,
06:43 Koppelman shoots, Nolley shoots,
06:45 Clark shoots, Stolle shoots,
06:46 the score is piling up!
06:48 326, 327, 328, 329,
06:50 333, 331, 322, 333, 346,
06:53 327, 328, 329,
06:54 there's never been anything quite like this!
06:55 The crowd is going absolutely berserk!
06:57 I've never seen anything quite as spectacle!
06:59 And the crowd loves it!
07:00 And there's a right cross to the chin,
07:01 and a left uppercut,
07:03 and a high one to the centerfield stand!
07:04 Oh, a foul, a foul!
07:06 It's breathtaking, and they're mixing it up!
07:08 Wow, a basket, a basket!
07:09 Perry's off, Perry's off,
07:10 oh, touché!
07:11 And look at that block!
07:13 And look, look now at the sidelines!
07:15 And it's a touchdown!
07:16 Strike, ball, ball, strike, ball,
07:17 strike, he's out!
07:18 Out like a light!
07:19 Here comes the pitch,
07:20 it's a long road drive,
07:21 straight down the fairway!
07:21 Is it a strike?
07:22 Is it a strike?
07:23 No, a spare!
07:24 Oh, bad deuce!
07:25 Oh, bad deuce!
07:26 Oh, bad deuce!
07:26 Robbie!
07:27 Robbie, wow!
07:28 Wow, what a performance!
07:29 What a show!
07:30 It's every man for himself!
07:32 And that's why ice hockey is called a spectator sport!
07:36 (upbeat music)
07:38 (upbeat music)
07:41 (upbeat music)
07:43 [BLANK_AUDIO]