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00:46 In Kansas land at the start of the trails
00:50 that led to the golden west, the Oregon Trail and the Santa
00:56 Fe were the two that were known the best.
01:00 Here in the town of Old Westport,
01:03 the windswept trails begun.
01:07 But most of the time, all the folks down there
01:10 just drowsed in the Kansas sun.
01:14 Yippee-aye-yay, and the ho-ho-ho get along.
01:17 You swabs get along.
01:20 Come the rolling tree or the lone prairie,
01:23 just sail along the west.
01:25 Ho-ho-ho!
01:25 Steady as she goes!
01:32 [HOOTING]
01:35 It sailed into Westport in a cloud of dust,
01:43 down Main Street and past Quincy Store,
01:46 then hole two at the Star of the West
01:49 started making a tack for shore.
01:52 Ahoy there, mate!
01:55 Bellied a voice from the dust as an anchor dropped over the side.
02:00 It neatly furled round the hitching post,
02:02 and the prairie schooner was tied.
02:05 The folks edged closer for a better look
02:08 and were amazed at what they saw.
02:10 Oh, it's a carvered wagon, Conner Stoketot.
02:13 But there ain't no auction to draw.
02:16 The difference was built above the top.
02:19 A deck ran from stem to stern.
02:21 A mast was rigged with a tattered sail,
02:24 and a tiller the wheels did turn.
02:26 Avast, me hearties!
02:32 The town folks stared and said nary a word,
02:35 then pushed out Mayor Crumb.
02:38 He cleared his throat before he spoke.
02:40 (CLEARS THROAT)
02:42 Howdy! Where be you from?
02:44 Avast there, lubbers!
02:46 I'm Captain Smith, and I've sailed the seven seas.
02:50 Now I've cruised to the west, and I intend to sail the lone prairies.
02:55 Well, your clothes don't look like nothing we've seen,
02:58 but your wagon's the type we approve.
03:01 With no auction or horses to pull the darn thing,
03:05 must be the wind makes 'em move.
03:07 You guessed it, me hearty.
03:09 But now let's toe the talk.
03:11 Till I see what your galley holds,
03:13 I haven't had chow for over a week.
03:15 My innards is furled and foaled.
03:18 He seated himself in the star of the west
03:22 and yelled an order or two.
03:25 Fetch me some grog with biscuit and beef.
03:28 All he got was buffalo stew.
03:30 Served by the mayor's daughter,
03:32 a beautiful craft was she.
03:35 With hair like a Zanzibar sunset,
03:38 and eyes like a blue-green sea.
03:40 She swayed with the grace of a schooner
03:48 and had the lines of a full-rigged ship.
03:51 Captain Smith most swallowed his scuppers,
03:54 and his heart did a hornpipe flip.
03:56 ( knocking )
03:58 ( bell dings )
03:59 ( clears throat )
04:02 My, go take a walk.
04:05 The captain me has got business.
04:08 And business is just man talk.
04:11 ( clears throat )
04:17 Ah, where was we at?
04:19 Huh?
04:20 Oh, yes, about that there wind wagon.
04:22 A question I'll clearly state.
04:25 I know you don't use any critters,
04:28 but will the bling thing haul freight?
04:30 You can bet your last blinkin' barnacle.
04:33 Freight is just ballast, you know.
04:36 Her hold will hold a full cargo,
04:39 and in Kansas the winds always blow.
04:42 ( crowd gasping )
04:43 The prairie is just like the ocean,
04:46 only greener and drier, you see.
04:49 And the billowing waves of buffalo grass
04:52 make sailing quite easy to be.
04:55 Now take the course charted here on the map
04:58 that leads down to old Santa Fe.
05:01 Wind wagons take almost two months.
05:04 I'll sail it in 14 days.
05:07 Now Jake Schaefer was one who could figure things out,
05:11 so took pencil in hand with a pad.
05:14 He scratched down some figures and added 'em up.
05:17 That's a quarter of the time he got.
05:20 I'll write some more figures and push 'em about.
05:23 That's four times the profit, land's sake.
05:26 We could build a whole fleet of wind wagons.
05:29 Now look at the money we'll make.
05:32 But they should be bigger and larger inside.
05:35 Then we'll make twice as much, don't you see?
05:38 Keep to it, you lovers, and stand by a while.
05:41 So happens I have the charts here with me.
05:44 He unfurled the plans of a super wind wagon
05:47 where everyone could see.
05:50 Fates, I'm ready to organize the Prairie Clipper Company.
05:55 ( crowd gasping )
05:57 They signed up and formed a board.
05:59 They shook hands with each other a while.
06:02 And monies were paid for keels to be laid.
06:05 Hit them out into quarter pi.
06:08 ( hammering )
06:10 They laid out the keel of the super wind wagon.
06:13 ( hammering )
06:16 Worked on her day and night.
06:19 White oak and hickory were used in the ribs.
06:22 ( hammering )
06:25 And the wheels were made just for the wheels just right.
06:29 ( music playing )
06:32 Wind wagon met Molly each night after work
06:36 on the unfinished deck that was free.
06:39 As they sat 'neath the moon,
06:41 he'd tell her tales of life on the bounding sea.
06:45 ( moaning )
06:47 Molly's father was one who frowned on such things.
06:50 You could see he was mad as a crow.
06:53 He called his daughter-- Molly!
06:55 Oh, dear.
06:57 Get for the house!
06:59 I've heard about sailors, you know.
07:02 ( music playing )
07:04 Then came the day the wind wagon was finished.
07:07 What a sight for everyone's eyes.
07:10 Her 12-foot wheels had hubs big as barrels,
07:13 and her mast seemed to reach the sky.
07:16 The wagon tongue ran up to the deck
07:19 as a tiller it stood in good stead.
07:21 A tobacco storewood and Indian
07:23 was used for the craft's figurehead.
07:26 So beautifully fitted and greased it was,
07:29 she's mighty pretty,
07:31 she'd move with the touch of a hand.
07:33 Why, a lot of swan.
07:35 And they rolled her out to the edge of town.
07:38 ( gunshots )
07:42 Accompanied by the Westport band.
07:45 ( music playing )
07:49 Molly got set to christen the craft.
07:52 Mid cheers and a toot of a horn,
07:55 she took dead aim on the wood Indian's head
07:58 and broke a jug of old Kansas corn.
08:01 ( glass shatters )
08:03 ( music playing )
08:06 The board of directors were set for the voyage,
08:12 and Miss Molly led them up to the hold.
08:15 When her father said--
08:17 "Molly, go take a walk.
08:19 This cruise is for men," she was told.
08:22 ( sobbing )
08:25 Admiral Winn Wagon Smith mounted the deck
08:27 and whacked the bell eight times o'er.
08:30 Then looked in the hold that was fully packed and yelled--
08:33 "All ashore that's going ashore."
08:36 Now he unfurled the mainsail down to the deck,
08:41 then grabbed the long tiller pole,
08:44 and bellied out in the Kansas breeze.
08:47 And the Winn Wagon started to row.
08:49 ♪ She headed down the Santa Fe Trail ♪
08:52 ♪ She picked up speed in the breeze ♪
08:55 ♪ Down below the directors sat ♪
08:58 ♪ Trying to control their knees ♪
09:01 ♪ Cutting a swath through the buffalo grass ♪
09:04 ♪ The clipper sailed along ♪
09:07 ♪ Winn Wagon Smith was so pleased with his craft ♪
09:10 ♪ He started to sing his song ♪
09:13 ♪ Yippee-aye-yay and a yo-ho-ho ♪
09:16 ♪ On our maiden voyage we sail ♪
09:19 ♪ We're on our way to Santa Fe ♪
09:22 ♪ And we're really a-blazin' the trail ♪
09:25 I calculate we'll go in 60.
09:29 60?
09:31 ( all cheering )
09:32 Coyote reef dead ahead.
09:35 Lincoln Savages hard aboard.
09:39 Engines?
09:41 Rig for off-sea.
09:44 ( gagging )
09:46 Fasten down the hatches.
09:50 Stop this contraption?
09:55 If you don't stop, we'll sue.
09:58 Let us off! Let us off!
10:02 Okay, you swabs, hold on to your seats.
10:05 I'm gonna bring her about.
10:07 He pushed on the tiller and turned back toward town
10:10 The sail angled out from the mast.
10:12 Then he pulled on the handle to straighten her out.
10:15 Lo and behold, the wheels, it stuck fast.
10:18 Smith pulled and tugged with all of his might
10:21 But his efforts were all in vain.
10:23 She sailed in a circle two miles wide.
10:26 The board was still raising cash.
10:29 She's east.
10:34 Now, each time the wagon sailed past the town
10:37 A member or two would jump out.
10:40 Like rats abandon a sinking ship
10:43 They'd hit running and tumbling about.
10:46 Here comes another.
10:55 It is honor the mayor.
10:57 When wagon Smith was now all alone and bowed
11:01 I'll go down with the wreck.
11:04 Then his eyes did pop as a hatch cover opened
11:07 And Molly climbed out on the deck.
11:09 She tacked to the stern and hoved to its Smith's side.
11:13 I was hidden, she coyly did say.
11:16 Well, shiver me timbers and furl me jibs
11:20 You're the wind wagon's first stowaway.
11:23 Now, you'd better get off, 'cause I can't steer
11:26 And I'm afeard her seams will rip.
11:28 We're in for a blow from that hurricane.
11:31 My captain, don't give up the ship.
11:33 Just then the old Kansas twister hit.
11:36 With a howl like a wild Cherokee.
11:40 She sun-fished and bumped and the wheels did shake.
11:45 Then the tiller broke itself free.
11:48 I can steer her again and we'll ride out this gale.
11:54 He fought the storm without rest.
11:57 The wagon sailed out on top of the blow
12:00 As the twister headed due west.
12:03 The old wind wagon wasn't heard of again
12:13 Except in tales old timers told.
12:18 They saw a wagon amongst the clouds
12:23 When the sun set turned to gold.
12:28 She'd be a-sailing in the painted sky
12:33 They'd swear on a buffalo hide.
12:38 Wind wagon Smith was a-steering this rig
12:43 With a beautiful gal at his side.
12:48 Yippee-yi-yay and a-yo-ho-ho
12:52 We're sailing along on high
12:56 Just Molly and me or the lone prairie
13:01 On our wagon way up in the sky.
13:05 On our wagon way up in the sky.
13:14 [instrumental]
13:23 [BLANK_AUDIO]