• last year
Bamboo camera-wielding filmmaker-artist-shaman-extraordinaire Kidlat Tahimik reflects on the power of cosmic faith and duendes throughout his life. Here, Esquire's "Artist of the Year" sits down with us to discuss his own circumnavigation and eventual "awakening," his art practice, and what it's like to have an indio-genius as a father.
Transcript
00:00 If your father is a military fascist.
00:05 "Son, what's 2+2?"
00:09 "Huh? 2+2 is 5!"
00:12 "Huh? I told you it's not 5!"
00:15 You know the concept I used for Duende?
00:27 It's kind of a metaphor.
00:29 We often talk about the Duende of the woods,
00:33 the Duende of the river,
00:35 or the Duende of the mountains.
00:36 It's a colonial word from Spanish.
00:38 But it's really part of our language.
00:42 So Duende for me is like an energy,
00:45 like a force that comes from within.
00:48 Usually when there are young artists,
00:51 filmmakers, painters,
00:55 who ask me, "Oh, sensei, what's your secret?"
01:01 It's not because I studied here,
01:06 or some prestigious place,
01:08 or I was under some great mentor.
01:12 Duende for me is our creativity,
01:17 our language that can only be original
01:20 because it comes from within.
01:25 What do I mean by this?
01:27 For me, Duende is a product.
01:30 Your own Duende is really a unique entity
01:34 that frames the world.
01:36 Your Duende will have that frame,
01:38 whatever shape it is,
01:40 nobody else can have.
01:41 If your Duende is free,
01:45 this is the combination of,
01:47 for me, two strong influences.
01:51 Where you grew up, or how you grew up,
01:54 that's the first influence,
01:55 your personal upbringing.
01:56 It can influence later on,
01:59 how you see the world.
02:01 So, just as an example,
02:03 it's my favorite example,
02:04 if your father is a military fascist,
02:09 "Son, what's 2+2?"
02:13 "Huh? 2+2 is 5!"
02:16 "Huh? I said it's not 5!"
02:19 If that's your first influence,
02:22 it's going to affect the way you look at the world
02:25 and how you interact with the world.
02:27 I mean, compared to, let's say,
02:29 if your father was a very gentle theater artist,
02:34 "Son, maybe 2+2?"
02:38 "Let's see if 5 is the right answer,
02:40 or we'll go."
02:41 So, these kinds of early influences
02:45 are one factor.
02:46 The other factor is your overall cultural influence.
02:51 So, if you grew up in a village,
02:54 let's say, like Forbes Park Village,
02:57 you look at it differently
02:58 compared to if you grew up in a culture of,
03:01 let's say, an Ifugao village.
03:02 So, if you see somebody walking on the street
03:05 wearing a bag, like me,
03:07 if you're a college student,
03:10 if you ride every day in a Mercedes-Benz
03:13 and you only see Makati,
03:15 you see a kid walking along the street,
03:23 that's your framing.
03:24 "Wow! Tweet, tweet!"
03:28 But if you grew up in a village
03:30 where every day, there's someone wearing a bag,
03:33 and the use of the bag
03:36 also shows the personality of the person,
03:39 you take it as a normal thing,
03:41 your reaction is different.
03:42 So, your framing is affected
03:44 mainly by those two things.
03:46 Because of that,
03:46 you have a very special Duende framing.
03:50 And as an artist,
03:51 that's what I tell young indie filmmakers,
03:54 find your own Duende.
03:56 Don't be a copycat.
03:57 After 400 years of colonization,
04:00 it's easy to become a copycat culture.
04:02 You want to be the Disney of the Philippines.
04:04 You want to be the Beatles of the Philippines
04:08 or the Picasso of the Philippines.
04:10 But we're good at it.
04:13 Why don't we look inside our own bag?
04:16 Because your Duende framing is already there.
04:20 It's already inside.
04:21 And that will be your storyline in your film.
04:24 That will be your framing in your canvas
04:27 or in your novel you're going to write.
04:30 That to me is the easiest way
04:32 I can share it with young people.
04:34 Find your Duende,
04:35 that unique, creative entity inside of you.
04:39 And take care of it, nurture it.
04:41 Then write your play,
04:42 make your film,
04:43 or do your book.
04:44 And I think the world is waiting for that.
04:46 Raising a family is a big challenge.
04:50 And again,
04:51 maybe you can do it the mainstream way
04:54 or you can follow the footsteps of the old.
04:58 But I said,
05:00 "Straying on track."
05:01 I grew up in a family where
05:03 my father was a member of the Rotary Club,
05:06 my mother was the head of the Girl Scouts.
05:07 I was taught at Maryknoll School.
05:11 I was good at English when I was a little boy.
05:14 If I followed that track,
05:16 maybe my children would have done an MBA.
05:19 I don't know.
05:20 All my sons are artists.
05:23 I think that's why you asked the question.
05:25 Aside from hearing what I was talking about,
05:28 finding your own Duende and nurturing it
05:30 as against being a copycat.
05:32 First of all,
05:33 maybe because I wanted my children to be my friends.
05:36 My father was a son of a generation.
05:39 It was a hierarchy.
05:41 My eldest son, Kidlat,
05:43 would play with my cameras.
05:45 He'd say,
05:46 "Hey, your cameras are holier than thou."
05:49 "No, don't touch it."
05:50 So they learned to shoot with a bamboo camera.
05:54 To shoot with our local eyes.
05:58 To tell a story from a local point of view
06:02 and not what the formula tells you.
06:04 I taught them in public schools
06:07 here in Sped, Baguio.
06:10 There was a People Power Rally in 1986.
06:15 They were in grade school.
06:16 There was a People Power Rally.
06:19 I joined them.
06:20 You learn a lot more out here
06:22 than memorizing hecacy books in school.
06:27 Because I was working on myself.
06:29 Decolonizing myself.
06:31 I wanted to change the concept of parenthood
06:34 and the generation of my parents.
06:37 And to give freedom to my children's twins.
06:40 Maybe,
06:42 even if my intention is conscious or not,
06:45 that's the goal of my fatherhood.
06:50 As a matter of fact,
06:51 you probably heard this,
06:52 when I was teaching film courses in UP,
06:56 the last thing I said at the end of the semester was,
06:59 "Okay kids, whatever we learned this semester,
07:03 whether it's technical or artistic
07:06 or how to mix a film story,
07:10 there's only one thing I want you to remember
07:11 at the end of the semester.
07:13 That Gilat Tahimik is a father
07:15 and a filmmaker in that order."
07:18 My priority is my fatherhood.
07:20 My career as a filmmaker is only secondary.
07:23 And I think it's,
07:25 in everything we do,
07:27 if we know our priorities,
07:29 I think we will not abuse our capacity as creative people
07:40 because we have a sense of responsibility to our audiences.
07:44 Maybe that's the kind of thought I have
07:48 that I passed on to them because they are my friends.
07:51 So I'm quite proud now to make it short.
07:55 As long as I let them be,
07:57 I avoided the usual dictum of my parents,
08:00 "Huh? You're going to do fine arts?
08:02 You'll just starve, don't do that.
08:03 Just do your MBA."
08:06 And especially the "Bahala na" philosophy that I picked up.
08:10 Just remember, "Bahala na" was framed by the foreigners
08:13 as a negative value.
08:15 "Bahala na."
08:16 But I think, in my opinion,
08:19 "Bahala na" is like,
08:21 "I don't have anything else to do, I'll just do it."
08:23 Or like Phantomad,
08:25 "Bahala na, I'll just wait for the banana to fall.
08:28 I have nothing else to do."
08:31 These kinds of negative framing of letting,
08:37 you let your thoughts and events interplay in your life.
08:44 I think "Bahala na" came from "Bathala na."
08:48 "Bathala na" is,
08:49 "Do everything you need to do.
08:51 You use your brain, you use your brawn,
08:55 you do whatever you have to do,
08:57 and then the final outcome,
09:00 "Bathala na."
09:02 You're humble enough to say,
09:05 "Okay, wherever my film or my work goes,
09:09 "Bathala na."
09:11 But it also means,
09:13 "You'll do everything you need to do
09:15 so it goes in your direction."
09:19 It is a proactive word.
09:21 So maybe that's what I passed on to my children.
09:24 Maybe if I became a banker on Wall Street,
09:26 their growth would be different.
09:29 My child-rearing would be different.
09:31 And I have to thank my wife a lot for that.
09:34 When I met Kathryn,
09:35 she catalyzed my becoming an artist,
09:39 which maybe I passed on to my kids.
09:42 Kathryn was part of the new generation in Germany
09:46 that was very much against the fascistic ways
09:50 of World War II.
09:53 She was born in 1950, right after the war.
09:56 And I'm happy that my children's dwendes are kicking and alive.
10:01 They're all crazy creators.
10:06 Well, if they want to become a banker one day,
10:09 what can I do?
10:10 But at least,
10:10 I think in that way,
10:16 So that's a little way of culture-bearing.
10:22 I'm aware that I don't want my parents to be strict with me.
10:31 But to be playful,
10:32 to let it flow,
10:35 I think, wow, full of surprises.
10:40 But hell on earth.
10:41 [BLANK_AUDIO]

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