An uncommon way to beat loneliness || Acharya Prashant (2019)
Video Information:
Advait Learning Camp, 21.12.19, New Jersey, USA
Context:
~ What is loneliness?
~ How to get rid of loneliness?
~ What is the difference between loneliness and aloneness?
Music Credits: Milind Date
~~~~~
Advait Learning Camp, 21.12.19, New Jersey, USA
Context:
~ What is loneliness?
~ How to get rid of loneliness?
~ What is the difference between loneliness and aloneness?
Music Credits: Milind Date
~~~~~
Transcript
00:00 The question that I have for today from the reading, it appears that when one is trying
00:19 to escape from the loneliness, the reading of a spiritual book or practicing some meditation
00:29 techniques is also not considered as the right thing to do.
00:40 Could you share some light on this?
00:46 When the intention is to somehow escape from loneliness rather than go to the root of loneliness
01:08 rather than come face to face with loneliness, then anything that one does is just not honest.
01:24 Honesty does not lie in turning one's face away from the facts of one's life.
01:39 That is obvious.
01:40 And if the fact of one's life is loneliness, then one has to figure out what loneliness
01:54 is.
01:56 One has to squarely look into the eyes of loneliness.
02:04 One has to strike a conversation.
02:09 Instead of that, if one finds an alternative, then the alternative would remain a valueless
02:24 one even if it is a so-called holy alternative.
02:32 Always remember that real holiness lies only in basic honesty.
02:42 So, if from a center of dishonesty, one is turning towards holy books, then the books
02:54 remain holy but one's approach to the books, one's attitude to the books does not remain
03:05 holy.
03:07 How will it benefit you if you touch a holy book in an unholy way?
03:16 When you escape from your loneliness, instead of confronting it, instead of digging deep
03:26 into it, coming to the truth of it, then the approach itself is unholy.
03:36 An unholy approach turns even a holy book useless.
03:44 Remember Shakespeare, the devil can cite scripture for his purpose.
03:55 Now the devil cannot really turn the scripture unholy.
04:03 But the purpose for which the devil would touch the scripture would not be pious.
04:15 Kindly do not try to categorize activities per se into holy or unholy.
04:26 We have a strong tendency to do that because that is so easy.
04:31 Because that does not really require any inner work or discrimination.
04:40 So we find a lazy categorization very easy and compelling.
04:46 We want to say what are holy deeds, reading this, this, this, going to a temple, doing
04:55 such an act, performing charities, helping somebody, meditating.
05:05 So this is the list of holy acts.
05:08 Right, done, finished.
05:13 What are unholy acts?
05:18 Another list of ten things that you can very comfortably tag as unholy.
05:28 It is not the action itself or the object that is holy or unholy.
05:38 It is the way you use it, it is the purpose for which you utilize it.
05:49 There might be a greatly holy place, a place of worship.
05:55 But some debauched mind may use that place to commit a rape or a murder.
06:07 The place still remains holy.
06:10 But look at the fallen mind.
06:11 He has committed the foulest of actions in the highest of places.
06:18 That's what man is capable of.
06:23 Man can use even God for his nefarious intentions.
06:34 I want to exploit others, I'll exploit others in the name of God.
06:38 Has that not happened always the world over?
06:43 Closer still, has that not happened for long in India?
06:50 So God remains God.
06:52 But man is such a rascal, he can appropriate even God for his unholy deeds.
07:04 Are you getting it?
07:09 Traveling can be the holiest of actions if the actor is right.
07:17 Do not try to brand or categorize actions.
07:20 Look at the actor.
07:25 Saying yes might be the holiest deed ever performed.
07:29 Saying no might be the holiest deed ever done.
07:34 Going towards left might be the most pious activity.
07:38 Going towards right might be the most pious activity.
07:41 Depends on the actor, depends on what you are doing there.
07:50 Saying A can be the holiest of actions.
07:56 Saying A can be the vilest of deeds.
08:04 Anything is right or wrong, holy or unholy, good or bad, virtuous or demeaning by itself.
08:19 It all depends on the actor behind the action.
08:25 Unfortunately, the moment you label certain actions as high, holy or godly, the actor,
08:39 the vile actor finds a safe refuge in those actions.
08:46 Are you getting it?
08:49 The vile actor finds a safe refuge in virtuous actions.
08:57 The action is virtuous, the actor is vile.
09:03 And that has been the story of mankind.
09:05 That has been the relation of man with religion.
09:11 Religion is about taking man to the highest point possible.
09:24 And man has misused religion in the meanest way possible.
09:37 What's worse?
09:38 When the results of man's dark relationship with religion show up as harmful, then man
09:52 blames religion.
09:57 Man does not say that he has misused religion.
09:59 Man says religion in itself is unnecessary and evil.
10:12 Give the best of things to the worst of persons and you know the result in advance.
10:26 If you meet the Satan and gift him the Gita or the Bible, then it is not that the Satan
10:37 will be transformed.
10:40 Rather, it is quite likely that the Satan would add another arrow to his quiver.
10:53 Now he has another tool in his arsenal called Gita or Bible.
11:02 Are you getting it?
11:05 Don't be so concerned with only the actions.
11:12 I'm not asking you to ignore actions.
11:13 I'm saying don't be just concerned with the superficial and apparent aspect of actions.
11:19 When you look at actions, probe deep into them so that you may discover the actor.
11:28 It is the actor who suffers and therefore it is the discovery of the actor that would
11:35 lead to liberation from suffering.
11:38 Does the action suffer or is it the actor who receives suffering?
11:44 It is the actor.
11:46 So while looking at actions is important, looking only at actions would not yield you
11:53 any benefits.
11:55 Look at actions and then dig deep into them till you reach the actor.
12:01 Come face to face with the actor.
12:04 That's where liberation lies.
12:07 That's where truth lies.
12:08 Whenever I'm feeling alone, my usual response is TV, some series.
12:16 If I'm really in a good mood, your videos, books.
12:21 And then sometimes I feel frustrated after so many of your videos because I'm not living
12:30 it in my life.
12:32 So I just want to get away from it and do something else like watch a movie or something.
12:38 But this also eventually keeps bringing frustration and then I switch off everything.
12:44 I don't play with my pet and this is when I'm working from home and I don't have anything
12:48 to do.
12:49 Then there is the sadness.
12:51 Then there's maybe tears, sadness, the miserable feeling.
12:59 But I cannot be with that for long.
13:04 I immediately go, my mind already in the background starting to work for the end substitutes like
13:10 alcohol or smoking or something.
13:15 I try to fight it but it doesn't stick for long.
13:19 Maybe 15 minutes, half an hour.
13:22 After that I become a loser and I give up.
13:25 How to have this courage and conviction to proceed for a longer time?
13:35 Learn to lose.
13:36 Learn to lose.
13:37 There is no option.
13:42 Learn to lose.
13:48 There are certain battles that you are certainly avoiding.
13:54 No point avoiding them.
14:01 You'll have to enter those battles even if you get badly beaten.
14:15 You'll have to answer this for yourself.
14:22 There is surely something that demands to be done, that deserves to be done.
14:31 But you are not paying the thing it's due.
14:37 There is some worthy battle that deserves to be fought.
14:41 But you are not accepting the challenge.
14:44 Because you are not accepting the challenge, there is an intrinsic misery in life.
14:55 Self-respect is missing.
15:03 One is not really able to admire oneself.
15:11 That's not at all a nice place to be in.
15:20 Fight the right battle.
15:23 Pick up the right project, the right challenge and lose it and lose in it.
15:41 If that's what to be.
15:45 But you'll find that that kind of a defeat will be far more beneficial to you compared
15:55 to the kind of gains that you might be enjoying in your seemingly secure and ordered life.
16:12 Let there be a little chaos.
16:16 Let there be a little destruction.
16:21 Get beaten up, bleed a little.
16:27 All that will happen.
16:28 Externally you will appear like a loser.
16:35 Certainly to the others and occasionally even to yourself it would appear like a bad deal.
16:45 But the benefits of this approach will become evident when you will look at your inner health.
16:58 You will find that inwardly the climate has improved a lot.
17:12 It is very necessary that one sets the highest standards for oneself.
17:32 Set high standards and live up to them.
17:39 And in living up to them if you have to fail many a times or pay a high price, be prepared.
17:54 You're not someone I need to counsel on what it means to set high standards.
18:04 You already know what is meant by highness.
18:12 You know what high in the real sense pertains to.
18:24 Fight a high battle.
18:31 Be your own hero.
18:38 Heroes don't have to cry in loneliness on their pillows.
18:50 That's one nice thing about being a hero.
18:57 You can sleep peacefully.
18:59 You don't have to wet the pillow.
19:10 That doesn't mean that you have to be one of the silver screen heroes.
19:16 Remember the high standards I'm talking of.
19:20 Set those high standards wisely with love and understanding.
19:32 And then do what it takes to meet them.
19:37 [Music]