We Swapped Genders - And Fell In Love | LOVE DON'T JUDGE
CIENNA and Lashaun met on TikTok, where they were both sharing their transgender journeys. It took a few attempts from Lashaun until he finally got Cienna's attention. She explained to Love Don't Judge: "Lashaun was commenting, commenting, commenting and I wasn't really paying any mind, but then the comments were like, 'Girl, go look at his page, go look at his page', and I was like, 'Oh, here he is,' and I saw this handsome gentleman here." The pair are very open about their transitions and sadly, some people dish out mean comments on their content. Cienna said: "We get a lot of judgement on social media and trolls a lot of the time just say that we're confused about gender." Agreeing, Lashaun added: "It really gets dark on TikTok. They'll use the Bible, they'll say, 'What are you going to do when God comes and it's time for you to go to heaven?'" Despite the judgement, the couple refuse to let the hate get them down. Cienna concluded: "To the people who judge our relationship, I would say mind your business. Good thing it has nothing to do with you. Worry about you and not about us. We're happy."
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00:00 This is Sienna.
00:02 She fell in love with...
00:04 LaShawn.
00:05 The transgender couple met on TikTok two years ago.
00:09 And LaShawn was like commenting, commenting, commenting
00:11 and I wasn't really paying any mind, but then the comments were like,
00:13 "Girl, go look at his page."
00:14 And I saw this handsome gentleman here.
00:17 We get a lot of judgment on social media
00:19 and trolls a lot of the times will say that we're confused about our gender.
00:22 And despite proudly sharing their transgender journeys,
00:26 they often face backlash.
00:28 It really gets dark on TikTok.
00:30 The comments were just nasty.
00:32 Anybody that's not trans wouldn't understand what it feels like
00:35 to literally feel like you're in the wrong body.
00:37 Like to literally look at yourself in the mirror
00:39 and see someone that looks foreign to you.
00:41 I'm LaShawn.
00:45 And I'm Sienna.
00:46 And we get judged on our transitions as a transgender couple.
00:50 I'm 23 years old and I'm a full-time content creator.
00:53 I'm 24 years old and I am a fitness content creator.
00:59 We met through TikTok.
01:00 Sienna thought I was a chaser.
01:02 I came in the live.
01:04 She wasn't paying attention to me.
01:05 Her comment section had to help me out.
01:08 On TikTok and being online, a lot of men will say stuff to me,
01:11 but I'm usually just focused on whatever I'm doing.
01:13 And LaShawn was commenting, commenting, commenting
01:15 and I wasn't really paying any mind, but then the comments were like,
01:18 "Girl, go look at his page. Go look at his page."
01:20 And I was like, "Oh, okay."
01:22 And I saw this handsome gentleman here.
01:25 Then we just started talking off and on for some months.
01:28 And then I had my time surgery and then she was in the picture ever since.
01:32 I had never dated anybody trans before LaShawn.
01:36 So that was kind of like a thing for me.
01:38 I was kind of like, "Well, I don't know if once we like, you know,
01:41 me and I get together and stuff, if you'll be for me."
01:44 But then once we started talking like consistently and stuff
01:46 and he showed me how nurturing and how caring he was
01:48 and just how he wore his heart on his sleeve, really,
01:51 that was when my attraction really like broadened.
01:54 We became an official couple January 2021.
01:57 Wait, January 2022.
02:00 January 2023?
02:03 Was that the January that just happened?
02:04 That's crazy how many years you just missed.
02:06 I know because I'm thinking... January 2023.
02:10 All right, there we go.
02:11 And we're live, y'all. Make sure you guys are coming in.
02:13 Tap the screen, share the live, say what's up,
02:15 because what's going on? What's the tea?
02:18 We get a lot of judgment on social media and trolls a lot of the times
02:21 will say that we're confused about our gender.
02:23 When we live stream, we usually have like a lot of views.
02:25 Like we've had up to 4.5K views in one sitting.
02:29 So out of those, it can get pretty crazy.
02:34 People will ask us, "Who's the boy and who's the girl?"
02:37 Which is so weird.
02:38 Like you can clearly see she's the woman, I'm the man in the relationship.
02:43 A lot of people will ask about genitalia.
02:45 A lot of people will say things like, "Why not be with a real man?"
02:48 Or, "Why not be with a real woman?"
02:49 They equate everything to genitalia when it's so much more than that.
02:53 Like maybe for them, that's what they look for in their relationship.
02:56 But I couldn't ask for more of a man than what LaShawn provides for me.
03:00 It really gets dark on TikTok.
03:02 They'll like use the Bible.
03:04 They will say, "What are you going to do when God comes
03:08 and when it's time for you to get in heaven?"
03:10 It'll be a lot of people trying to use religion against us
03:12 or trying to use their own personal beliefs to say that we're going to be condemned.
03:17 That's their favorite word, condemned.
03:19 They do anything for clout.
03:21 Loud and wrong.
03:23 They're lying.
03:25 Loud and wrong.
03:27 What restrooms do you each use?
03:30 Nosy and just in our business.
03:32 Because does it look like I'm walking in a guy's bathroom? No.
03:35 Whenever I call cis women, "cis women,"
03:39 they love to correct me and say, "You mean real women."
03:43 Real in all gaps.
03:45 For the most part, I don't really respond to the hate comments.
03:48 There's no breaking through to people that I ignore and don't want to understand.
03:51 The judgment that we receive on social media, it doesn't faze me anymore.
03:57 Sometimes it will get to Sienna.
03:59 We're trying to raise money for her breast augmentation.
04:03 That was just like a really bad streaming day.
04:06 The comments were just nasty. Like, really, really nasty.
04:10 It irritates me the majority of the time.
04:13 But other than that, I feel like I'm fine because I have her at the end of the day.
04:18 I just am so much more than my trans identity.
04:21 One stereotype that a lot of people have about trans women
04:23 is that we're trying to steal the spotlight or take over the world.
04:27 Or we're trying to take the spot of cisgender being biological women.
04:31 A lot of people think that trans women are trying to transition to get man,
04:34 and that is a weird misconception.
04:37 We just want to feel like us.
04:38 We don't want to go through the constant gender dysphoria or feeling misplaced.
04:42 I feel like anybody that's not trans wouldn't understand what it feels like
04:46 to literally feel like you're in the wrong body.
04:48 Like, to literally look at yourself in the mirror and see someone that looks foreign to you.
04:52 So, yeah, definitely a misconception, definitely a stereotype,
04:55 and one that we need to squash.
04:59 So today we're going to be picking out outfits for our next Ballroom competition.
05:02 Ballroom is a space for queer people to come together and compete for prizes, trophies, and sometimes money.
05:08 Pass me that one and this one.
05:10 This one.
05:12 Which one is more teacher-y?
05:14 Actually, both of them.
05:16 It just depends on the kind of teacher.
05:18 Is this going to be a teacher with a dress?
05:19 Either a teacher with a sass or the teacher with style.
05:22 Let me see this one too.
05:23 One of them.
05:24 I would say this one.
05:25 What kind of teacher is this one?
05:26 That's the laid-back teacher.
05:28 Oh, this laid-back?
05:29 Okay, that's the kind of teacher I would be.
05:30 Do teachers wear heels?
05:31 Do teachers wear heels?
05:32 They definitely do.
05:33 Well, I would be a bad teacher.
05:35 No, baby.
05:36 No.
05:37 That's not teacher-y.
05:39 This is so cute.
05:40 I really like blue on you.
05:41 You like blue on me?
05:42 Yeah.
05:43 I realized that I wasn't identifying with the gender that I was born when I was 13.
05:47 I felt like I was in the wrong body.
05:50 I decided to transition and realized that my actual gender was a transgender woman when I was 20 years old.
05:56 Do you remember the first time you put on the wig?
05:58 Yes.
05:59 I was taking so many pictures.
06:01 I wanted to post them so bad, but I was like, "No."
06:03 I had a mustache and everything.
06:04 I was like, "I'm not posting no videos.
06:06 I'm not posting no half drag."
06:08 I decided to transition when I was 19.
06:12 My name changed in December of 2022.
06:16 I had my top surgery, which was something major.
06:19 I haven't, like, stared at myself in a long time, which is scary to think about,
06:24 because the last time I had to reflect would have been before I had my top surgery.
06:29 In that moment, I really didn't like myself then,
06:32 only because I had breast tissue that I was just really uncomfortable with.
06:36 I wasn't too confident in myself, but I was willing to share that I felt different.
06:42 When that happened, the first person that I came out to relayed my transition to wanting to change my body parts.
06:51 I got upset. Like, I got really upset.
06:55 And my twin overheard, and then my mom found out.
06:58 She asked me, "Do you want to be a boy?"
07:01 And I said, "Yes."
07:02 And she was just like, "Why?"
07:05 And then the conversation about being comfortable came about.
07:08 One of the people in my life that doesn't favor my transition the most would be my dad.
07:13 One of the things that he has expressed concern about is me being safe.
07:17 He knows being a woman, being a black trans woman, that could possibly get me into situations that I don't need to be in.
07:23 I definitely understand the concern.
07:24 I mean, black trans women are getting killed every day for walking down the street,
07:28 and people knowing that they're trans or not being as possible.
07:31 Do I feel like he'll come around one day?
07:34 I hope that we can have a relationship one day.
07:36 I hope that he can inquire more about my transition to learn more.
07:40 And I feel like he's a smart man, so I feel like if he gives the chance to understand, I definitely feel like he would.
07:46 I'm fine with my baby pictures until I see the color pink or anything girly.
07:51 Looking at pictures this young specifically, I feel like even here, I was so feminine.
07:56 I remember that far back, I was still super hyper feminine.
08:00 It's crazy to think that one day I would be on TikTok and I would meet somebody just like me, but different, but the opposite, but the same.
08:09 You just have to throw a little wine in the mix.
08:12 So when me and Lashawn first started dating, everybody was very supportive.
08:15 My mom loved Lashawn. I had told her about us very early on.
08:20 She has said, "As long as he loves me and I love him, and he's making me happy and I'm making him happy, then there's nothing more that she could ask for."
08:27 I didn't really tell my family that she was trans, because to me that doesn't matter.
08:33 I think our relationship works because we're very balanced.
08:37 We have our similarities, but we're definitely very different.
08:40 Him being an introvert, me being an extrovert.
08:42 And also us just both being trans, I feel like he understands my transition to an extent.
08:47 I love her personality. She's very determined as well.
08:50 So those are some traits that I like about her.
08:53 So the people that judge our relationship, I would say, "Mind your business."
08:56 I would say, "It has nothing to do with you."
08:58 I would say, "Good thing relationships are two people and not however many people have something to say."
09:02 I would say, "Worry about you and not us. We're happy. Go find some."
09:06 That's wild.
09:09 [Laughter]
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