But starfish are normally so well-behaved! Welcome to WatchMojo, and today we’re counting down our picks for Patrick Star’s least likable moments. Keep an eye out for some minor spoilers!
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00:00 You're carrying precious cargo now.
00:02 You can't just wander aimlessly around like you've been...
00:05 What?!
00:06 Welcome to WatchMojo,
00:08 and today we're counting down our picks for Patrick Starr's least likable moments.
00:12 Keep an eye out for some minor spoilers.
00:14 Now what is it, Patrick?
00:15 You will never guess what happened to me today!
00:17 You got your license?
00:19 Yeah!
00:20 When SpongeBob decides to bring Patrick along for a day in the life of a boating school student,
00:28 it quickly goes south for him.
00:30 Saying that Patrick is an unruly classmate is like pointing out that the sky is blue.
00:34 Why are they laughing?
00:35 I guess it's just in the timing.
00:37 Oh...
00:38 [laughing]
00:42 He doesn't even care about how much doing well in school means to our yellow sponge.
00:46 He not only disrupts class with his use of spitballs,
00:48 he also creates a deeply offensive drawing of Mrs. Puff,
00:51 which he lets SpongeBob get blamed for.
00:53 When you are turning, it is important to signal at least...
00:56 Oh! Big fat meanie!
00:59 Patrick, you can't do that! She's the teacher!
01:01 He ultimately frustrates his friend to the point that they have a...
01:04 sort of brawl during recess that lands them both in detention.
01:08 Nice going, Patrick.
01:09 I hate you no matter what.
01:11 Yeah, well, I'd hate you even if I didn't hate you.
01:14 I'd hate you even if that made sense.
01:17 SpongeBob, Patrick, and company head to the kingdom of Atlantis in Atlantis Squarepantis,
01:25 but their trip takes an unexpected turn.
01:26 When they're shown what's said to be the oldest bubble in existence,
01:29 Patrick pops it without hesitation when he takes a photo.
01:32 This is the real deal.
01:34 Whoa!
01:36 That's bad enough on its own, but to add insult to injury,
01:41 you can't even call the pink starfish's actions accidental.
01:44 Earlier in the story, he destroyed the prop version of the bubble with the snap of a camera.
01:48 In other words, he essentially learned nothing from that prior experience.
01:52 That's not exactly surprising, but still, destroying ancient artifacts really isn't cool.
01:57 The world saw the perfect bubble!
02:01 Whoa!
02:02 Sometimes, friends tease each other, but nobody likes a bragger.
02:09 While fans know SpongeBob has had a difficult time securing a driver's license,
02:13 Patrick ends up getting one and driven to tears.
02:15 I passed my test!
02:17 You got a perfect score?
02:20 Yeah, I thought you said it was hard.
02:22 Perfect score.
02:25 And that accomplishment is one he continually boasts about,
02:28 to the point that it just gets plain mean.
02:30 We're not saying you can't be proud of yourself,
02:32 but you shouldn't rub it in people's faces,
02:34 especially when you know it can hurt them.
02:36 Thanks for the ride, Patrick.
02:38 No problem, buddy.
02:39 You can't help being a pedestrian.
02:43 While the sea star goes on about how fun driving is,
02:46 it isn't long until he starts to act reckless.
02:49 Driving may be fun, but it's also a huge responsibility, Patrick.
02:53 I don't have a boatmobile anymore.
02:55 What?
02:56 It stopped working, so I threw it away.
02:59 The needle was on E.
03:01 I figured that must mean "end."
03:03 Oh.
03:04 #17. Going on a karate rampage.
03:07 Unfortunately, Patrick is definitely one with himself during "Karate Star."
03:11 The episode finds him learning karate from SpongeBob,
03:14 and once he starts to gain a couple of moves under his belt,
03:16 mainly the chop, he starts to go rogue.
03:19 Hey, look, it's Patrick.
03:20 Hiya, SpongeBob.
03:22 What are you doing in--
03:23 Things get so bad that Patrick loses control of his entire arm.
03:28 He even becomes known as the Mad Chopper,
03:30 performing his signature move on nearly everything in sight.
03:33 There's a Mad Chopper on the loose!
03:34 Mad Chopper?
03:36 Patrick, we need the cops, kid!
03:39 Cops? No, that won't be necessary.
03:41 I'll handle this, citizen.
03:42 Soon, pretty much all of Bikini Bottom falls victim to his wild chopping spree.
03:46 Needless to say, this is not a side of Patrick we want to see more of.
03:49 This just in. A madman is chopping everything.
03:52 Not the giant screen TVs!
03:55 Oh, no!
03:56 Always make sure to practice karate safely,
03:58 and never let too much power go to your head.
04:01 #16. Eating Squibbert's tickets.
04:04 You should never eat anything that doesn't belong to you.
04:06 That goes for food, but it also goes for concert tickets,
04:09 as shown in "Smooth Jazz at Bikini Bottom."
04:11 When Squibbert's ticket to a concert gets close enough to Patrick's mouth,
04:15 the starfish goes to town.
04:17 You're probably not gonna get that back before showtime.
04:22 Don't bother trying to explain to him that it's not food.
04:24 We're guessing it'd be useless.
04:26 At least Squibbert gets another chance to attend the event
04:28 when SpongeBob wins the tickets.
04:30 But Patrick doesn't stop there.
04:31 He goes to the actual concert,
04:33 and also eats both SpongeBob and Squibbert's backstage passes.
04:37 Tommy, want more?
04:44 Squibbert isn't always likable,
04:46 but you can't help but sympathize with him in this situation.
04:48 Patrick really should learn to control himself.
04:51 [laughing]
04:54 All right, come back here with those backstage passes!
04:56 #15. Hunting SpongeBob.
04:59 SpongeBob and Patrick may be close friends,
05:01 but in "Nature Pants," that friendship is put to the test.
05:04 Are-- are-- are-- are you sure you wanna give me this mayonnaise?
05:08 It's all yours.
05:10 [stammering]
05:12 That these old phone books?
05:14 All yours, old friend.
05:16 When SpongeBob starts living amongst the jellyfish,
05:18 Patrick pleads for him to return, to no avail.
05:21 While it's a touching moment that shows
05:22 how much the starfish misses his best pal,
05:24 things take a pretty weird turn later.
05:27 Instead of just being there for his friend,
05:29 Patrick decides to hunt him.
05:30 If I can't have you as a friend,
05:34 I'm gonna make you a trophy!
05:38 I even picked out this nice jar for you!
05:41 And he doesn't go easy either,
05:43 really putting SpongeBob through the wringer
05:44 during his attempts to capture him.
05:46 We don't know what exactly the starfish was thinking,
05:48 but his behavior is disturbing, to say the least.
05:51 I gotcha now, SpongeBob!
05:54 Patrick, no!
05:56 [panting]
05:57 [screaming]
06:00 #14. Being a deadbeat dad.
06:03 Ever wondered what it'd be like if Patrick became a father?
06:05 Well, that kinda happens in "Rock-A-Bye Bye-Belle,"
06:08 and unfortunately, he isn't a very good dad.
06:11 Instead of nurturing the baby scallop, Dub Jr.,
06:13 that he and SpongeBob take in,
06:15 he ignores it in favor of watching TV after work.
06:18 Patrick, what about my break?
06:20 Oh, yeah, your break.
06:21 Tomorrow, I promise.
06:23 In case you were wondering, his job is also watching TV.
06:27 Hey, you wanna be a couch potato?
06:28 Sure, that's fine.
06:30 So, this is work?
06:32 But you can't do that all the time when you have a scallop,
06:34 and partner, depending on you.
06:36 You haven't been helping at all with Junior.
06:38 We made a commitment, and you're not doing your share.
06:41 You never do anything.
06:43 I changed his diaper.
06:44 Yeah, once.
06:45 Patrick has been lazy before,
06:47 but seeing how negligent he is in this situation
06:49 is pretty disheartening.
06:50 You just hate to see it.
06:51 Oh, so this is the thanks I get for working overtime.
06:56 #13. Destroying the Krusty Krab.
06:59 When Patrick is unable to pay his bill
07:00 while dining in the Krusty Krab,
07:02 Mr. Krabs has him work off his debt.
07:04 But that choice proves to be a fatal one for the restaurant.
07:06 The starfish doesn't just royally mess up each task.
07:09 When he tries shredding a bag containing money,
07:11 he breaks the compactor, causing an explosion.
07:14 Well, well, let's see how the poor boy's doing.
07:16 Well, did you earn me money back yet, Patrick?
07:18 This moment of stupidity causes the destruction
07:24 of the cash, the restaurant, and Mr. Krabs' patience.
07:28 Ultimately, this entire episode shows
07:30 how Patrick refuses to use basic logic,
07:32 and it can get really frustrating.
07:34 Almost done, Mr. Krabs!
07:36 You've destroyed me refrigerator!
07:40 You've destroyed many of the things I love!
07:43 It also proves he isn't cut out for fast food.
07:46 Eating it? Sure.
07:47 But working in the industry?
07:49 Eh, well, not so much.
07:51 This is a lot of cash, Pat!
07:54 #12. Taking part in National No SpongeBob Day.
07:58 This isn't something a friend should ever do.
08:01 In the episode titled "Gone,"
08:03 SpongeBob discovers that the entire population
08:05 of Bikini Bottom has vanished.
08:06 Patrick! Open up! Squidward and Gary are missing!
08:10 [grunting]
08:12 [panting]
08:14 Patrick's gone, too.
08:16 What if everybody's gone?
08:18 Seeing the city turn into pretty much a ghost town
08:20 worries him, and that's pretty understandable.
08:22 But in a shocking twist, it's revealed
08:24 that everyone actually left to celebrate
08:26 National No SpongeBob Day.
08:27 Everyone including Patrick.
08:29 [gasping]
08:31 You, too, Patrick?
08:32 Yeah, everybody needs at least one day away from...
08:37 [crying]
08:40 Yeah, SpongeBob can be a lot,
08:41 but this was a pretty messed up thing for anyone,
08:44 especially the starfish to do.
08:45 Hilariously, though, the exact same situation
08:48 then happens to Patrick when they celebrate No Patrick Day.
08:51 Wait till you see No Patrick Day!
08:53 Come on, everyone! Let's go!
08:55 [cheering]
08:57 [coughing]
08:59 See how that feels, Pat?
09:01 Yeah, it's not fun.
09:03 Number 11, not getting SpongeBob proper medical care.
09:06 After catching a disease known as SUDS,
09:08 SpongeBob tries to go to the doctor for help.
09:10 But before that happens, Patrick visits
09:13 and proves to be a major hindrance.
09:14 They make you read all magazines!
09:18 [gagging]
09:19 Then the doctor pulls out his stethoscope!
09:23 - No! - Yes!
09:25 He scares SpongeBob out of getting proper treatment,
09:27 which is bad enough on its own.
09:29 To make matters worse,
09:30 Patrick then tries curing the yellow sponge
09:32 to truly disastrous effect.
09:34 At this rate, I'll be cured in no time!
09:37 In fact, I'm gonna call Sandy and tell her not to come.
09:40 Thanks, Dr. Patrick!
09:42 And they said I'd never make anything out of myself.
09:45 Thankfully, Sandy is ultimately able to get SpongeBob proper care,
09:48 but we go through so much unnecessary trouble and pain
09:51 because of the sea star's idiocy.
09:53 Patrick's ignorance shows that he's definitely not qualified
09:55 to offer medical advice of any kind.
09:57 Show her, SpongeBob! Say, "Ahh!"
10:00 [growling]
10:02 [sizzling]
10:04 He is not who we would call in case of an emergency.
10:07 Also, really, Patrick?
10:09 You're faking the SUDS now to get a lollipop?
10:11 SpongeBob's a nervous wreck about his oral report for boating school,
10:18 no thanks to Squidward.
10:20 So we ask Patrick to help him practice.
10:22 How does Patrick help, you may ask?
10:24 By constantly interrupting his speech,
10:26 putting him through ridiculously over-the-top obstacles,
10:28 and generally adding to SpongeBob's anxiety.
10:31 Boating! Boating!
10:33 Come on, SquarePants! Is this the best you can do?
10:37 On top of it, when it's time for the actual report,
10:40 Patrick breaks the special goggles used to help with SpongeBob's stage fright.
10:43 Here, let me blow some up for you.
10:46 There you go.
10:49 Hey, remember when Patrick used to actually try to be helpful for his friend?
10:53 Clearly, this episode didn't,
10:55 because his helpfulness amounts to hurting the poor yellow sponge.
10:58 They're all staring.
11:00 [screaming]
11:02 Number nine, being a hypocrite.
11:04 In this episode, Squidward gets a hold of SpongeBob's diary
11:07 and reads it to the customers, including Patrick.
11:10 Rather than stop the ordeal and defend his friend's privacy, however,
11:14 Patrick joins in and starts teasing the absorbent fry cook.
11:17 Ah, cook me up a Krabby Patty
11:20 with good old Fifi.
11:23 [gasping]
11:25 Sure thing.
11:26 But when SpongeBob starts crying, the entire town turns on Squidward
11:29 and goes out of their way to antagonize him for his crime.
11:32 Patrick joins in the hypocrisy by chewing out the cephalopod,
11:35 even though he is far from innocent in this.
11:38 - Diary reader! - What?
11:40 - You read it too? - Oh, sure.
11:42 Blame everyone but yourself.
11:44 Reading someone's diary is wrong, but Patrick and the townsfolk
11:47 have no right to sanctimoniously punish Squidward for their hypocrisy,
11:51 unless they actually apologize to SpongeBob offscreen,
11:53 which we really doubt happened.
11:55 There he is, that diary reader. Let's get him!
11:58 Number eight, going mad with power.
12:01 It turns out that Patrick is of royal blood and is possibly a king.
12:04 So like any decent king, he totally abuses his power
12:08 to tax the townsfolk for their valuables.
12:10 Now my 40-year-old life and my comic book collection are complete!
12:15 Mom's gonna be so proud of me!
12:17 No, she won't be, because these comic books are mine!
12:21 SpongeBob's too scared to call his best friend out on his tyranny,
12:24 but thankfully, we have Squidward for that.
12:26 Stop! Patrick's no king!
12:29 Look at him! How can this pink blob be king?
12:32 We know Patrick has no idea how to be an actual ruler,
12:34 so it makes sense that the power would go to his head.
12:36 With great power comes great responsibility.
12:39 You have no clue what I just told you to do.
12:42 No.
12:43 Still, his behavior is truly appalling.
12:46 At least he sort of learns his lesson, though.
12:48 It turns out that Gary is actually the true king,
12:50 and he and Patrick are... somewhat related.
12:54 Ugh, poor snail.
12:56 Gary, you're a royalty!
12:58 Number seven, being ungrateful.
13:02 This season eight miniseries sees the main characters
13:04 showing off their vacation slides, and Patrick is among them.
13:07 Who knew being lazy could be so tiresome?
13:10 I need a break from the hustle and bustle of my everyday life.
13:14 I'm so exhausted.
13:16 Help me, SpongeBob!
13:18 Please help me!
13:19 He can't afford a real vacation,
13:21 so SpongeBob converts the rock into a resort
13:23 to give his best friend a comfortable staycation.
13:25 Your key, sir. And please don't hesitate to let us know
13:28 if there's anything we can do to make your stay more comfortable.
13:30 The little square dude jumps through hoops to make Patrick happy and safe.
13:34 And how does Patrick show his appreciation?
13:36 By running SpongeBob ragged, walking out on him,
13:39 and taking over his bed.
13:41 Patrick, what are you doing here?
13:42 Oh, that resort next door is too crowded.
13:45 And then I found this place. It's quiet and peaceful.
13:49 To top it all off, he never once says thank you
13:51 for his poorest pal's effort.
13:53 After all his hard work, SpongeBob could use an actual vacation,
13:56 away from unappreciated friends.
13:58 You have another nasty old dream?
14:00 Mm-mm.
14:01 Patrick in your bed again?
14:02 Mm-mm.
14:03 Aye. Well, good night, then.
14:05 Number six, making SpongeBob's splinter worse.
14:08 SpongeBob gets a wicked splinter
14:10 and desperately calls Dr. Patrick to fix it.
14:12 Well, I'm pretty booked today.
14:14 But I think I can fit you in.
14:16 Rather than be of any actual help,
14:18 Patrick self-righteously shames SpongeBob
14:20 for questioning his methods,
14:22 and then makes the splinter worse
14:23 in the most graphic and gruesome way possible,
14:26 before proceeding to just walk away.
14:27 That doesn't look good.
14:29 [beeping]
14:30 Yeah, but my shift is over.
14:31 Yep, you heard that right.
14:33 We can't quite get past the way he can just shrug off SpongeBob's dilemma,
14:36 do whatever he wants at his best friend's expense,
14:38 and not face consequences for his snobby blundering.
14:41 Needless to say, Patrick's both very much not a doctor
14:44 and a lousy friend.
14:46 Call me in the morning, if you can still dial a phone.
14:49 Number five, encouraging Sam's destructive temper.
14:52 The fact that they retconned Patrick not having any siblings
14:55 is already a bad start.
14:56 What's my mom gonna say?
14:58 Patrick.
14:59 Oh, my gosh, if my sister finds out--
15:00 Patrick.
15:01 Oh, wait, I don't have a sister.
15:02 Sam's long-lost big sister Sam comes to visit,
15:04 and she's even more brutish than her brother.
15:07 During her visit, Sam repeatedly harms Squibbard and SpongeBob
15:10 and dismantles their houses.
15:12 [Grunting]
15:14 This is way beyond my property line.
15:18 Squibbard is rightfully furious while SpongeBob tries to play peacemaker,
15:21 but Patrick scorns them for being mean to his sister.
15:24 Sam only shows regret after accidentally hurting Patrick,
15:27 but continuously harming the others is A-OK in her book.
15:30 While it's nice that Patrick has such a strong bond with his sister,
15:33 what right has he to encourage her destructive behavior
15:36 and ignore his friend's well-being?
15:37 Now, don't you think, Patrick,
15:39 that it's a teensy bit unfair
15:41 that Sister Sam dismantled Squibbard's house?
15:44 No, I don't.
15:46 Number four, turning against SpongeBob and embarrassing him.
15:49 Believe it or not, even during SpongeBob's golden age,
15:52 Patrick had his fair share of unlikable moments.
15:54 His parents are coming over,
15:56 and he's nervous that they think he's unintelligent.
15:58 SpongeBob decides to act like a dummy
16:00 to make his pink buddy look smart,
16:02 and it initially seems to work.
16:03 He means shake!
16:05 No, SpongeBob, no!
16:07 Shake hand!
16:09 However, Patrick gets caught up in the act
16:11 and starts rudely treating him like he really is dumb,
16:14 even behind the scenes.
16:15 Oh, SpongeBob.
16:17 If only you could see how stupid you sound right now
16:20 with your talk of imaginary plans.
16:23 The family jeers and laughs at SpongeBob
16:25 until he finally leaves in frustration.
16:27 Later, it turns out that the visitors
16:29 weren't even Patrick's real parents,
16:30 meaning he humiliated his best friend for nothing.
16:33 Oh, that's right, honey.
16:35 We don't have a son.
16:37 Oh, yeah.
16:38 Number three, acting like a spoiled brat.
16:41 Getting off to a bad start,
16:42 Patrick mooches off of SpongeBob
16:44 to buy a kid's meal for them to share
16:46 and then eats the whole meal for himself.
16:48 Are you gonna say something after me?
16:50 What?
16:51 Nothing.
16:52 Plus, Mr. Krabs manufactures a Paddy Pal toy
16:54 for the two to share,
16:55 except Patrick goes out of his way
16:57 to keep the toy for himself.
16:58 Hand it over, Patrick.
16:59 I get to play with the Paddy Pal today.
17:01 You can't take it.
17:03 It's not fair.
17:04 The starfish has had some selfish tendencies before,
17:06 but here, he's just a whiny baby
17:08 who fusses and cries when he doesn't get his way.
17:11 He even goes so far as to eat the toy, screaming...
17:13 If I can't have it, no one can!
17:17 Lesson learned.
17:19 Never share anything with a pink brat.
17:21 You'll literally pay the price for it.
17:23 This time, it's on me.
17:25 Patrick, that's my money.
17:28 Have you learned nothing about sharing?
17:31 Number two, neglecting Gary.
17:33 Our porous protagonist is going out for the day
17:35 and asks Patrick, his most responsible friend,
17:38 to watch over Gary.
17:39 What could possibly go wrong?
17:41 And I'm trusting my best pal
17:43 to watch carefully over Gary while I'm gone.
17:46 You got it.
17:47 He's safe with me.
17:49 For starters, he eats Gary's food right in front of him,
17:52 leaving the poor snail to starve.
17:54 Afterwards, Patrick forcibly bathes the pet
17:56 with a fire hose and flamethrower,
17:59 just because, and also floods the pineapple.
18:02 Sheesh, Gary.
18:04 If you wanted another bath, why didn't you just ask?
18:07 We're not sure which is worse,
18:09 Patrick harming his own blood relative without blinking,
18:11 or the cop-out ending making everything all right again,
18:14 even though it's really not.
18:15 In a just world, Gary would be taking care of himself,
18:18 and Patrick would get the babysitter.
18:20 Ah, reading Patrick a bedtime story, I see.
18:23 Snail Tales. That's a good one.
18:25 Snail Tales?
18:27 I thought it was called Meow, Meow, Meow.
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18:44 Number 1. Everything
18:48 SpongeBob has been desperately trying to find a rare Mermaid Man and Barticle Boy training card,
18:53 and guess who ends up with it?
18:54 Number 54! That's the best card there is!
18:57 It sure does the job all right.
18:59 SpongeBob is hell-bent on preserving the card,
19:02 but Patrick keeps putting it, and himself, in danger.
19:05 Then he makes a rather interesting comment.
19:07 SpongeBob, you can't always expect my usual brand of stupidity.
19:11 I like to mix it up. Keep pee on your toes.
19:14 This bizarre statement heavily implies that every dumb thing he does,
19:18 including endangering himself, later ruining the card,
19:21 and making SpongeBob cry, he does on purpose just for kicks.
19:24 Bad job!
19:26 Bad, bad, bad, bad job!
19:29 Go get your pants up in a square, not SpongeBob!
19:32 Though he does make amends with his yellow buddy for the whole card thing,
19:35 the damage is done.
19:36 This small remark paints a once-lovable doofus
19:39 as something of a sociopathic, selfish imbecile.
19:42 No, I'll never have Mermaid Man card number 54,
19:45 the special talking one!
19:47 Aw, sure you will.
19:49 What do you think was Patrick's worst moment?
19:51 Let us know in the comments.
19:53 Patrick Star, we need to talk.
19:55 Just one more minute, I got--
19:56 Don't one more minute me, Mr. Man.
19:58 Hey, I'm missing the coconut!
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20:08 [outro music]