Credit: SWNS / Lucinda Rose
A woman said her £40k wedding "ruined her life" - after planning the big day proved so stressful that it left her "broken" and unable to talk about it for three months after.
Lucinda Rose, 39, was thrilled when her partner Ian Brown, 43, popped the big question in January 2023 after 16 months of dating.
They booked a venue for September - and Lucinda told Ian she'd plan the whole thing.
But Lucinda's elaborate plan quickly snowballed in a bid to create a 'perfect wedding', inspired by Hollywood films and influencers' Instagram reels.
A woman said her £40k wedding "ruined her life" - after planning the big day proved so stressful that it left her "broken" and unable to talk about it for three months after.
Lucinda Rose, 39, was thrilled when her partner Ian Brown, 43, popped the big question in January 2023 after 16 months of dating.
They booked a venue for September - and Lucinda told Ian she'd plan the whole thing.
But Lucinda's elaborate plan quickly snowballed in a bid to create a 'perfect wedding', inspired by Hollywood films and influencers' Instagram reels.
Category
🛠️
LifestyleTranscript
00:00 I don't really remember most of my wedding because I was just so stressed and burnt out.
00:11 My name is Lucinda Rose, I am 39 years old and my wedding ruined my life temporarily
00:18 because it burnt me out to a debilitating level.
00:22 Ian actually didn't want a big wedding at all, he kept saying he wanted us to just elope,
00:28 just the two of us and my original plan was to keep it very small, maximum of 50 people.
00:34 I didn't want to spend any more than £15,000.
00:37 Then I found the venue and everything sort of spiralled from there because the venue
00:42 could fit a lot more people but we also wanted a pagan handfasting ceremony because that
00:48 was also incredibly meaningful to us.
00:54 I then just started to become obsessed with the finer details.
00:57 My family were paying for the majority of it, they then wanted to invite people that
01:03 they wanted.
01:04 It then became, okay well if you're having those people then I'm going to invite the
01:07 other people that I haven't put on the list yet and so it just became bigger and bigger.
01:12 We wanted to have it very unique to us, which it did end up being, but making it unique
01:18 meant that all these little details kept popping up and it was like, well I want that too and
01:23 I want that and I just became so obsessed with the details and making it personal that
01:28 the budget went completely out of the window.
01:33 On the day of the wedding I remember having a few minutes to myself in the morning and
01:39 thinking you've really got to take this in because you've spent so much money, it's been
01:44 nine months of your life, you haven't been able to focus on anything else so you better
01:49 enjoy this.
01:50 I cannot remember anything that happened in the church because I was trying so hard to
01:55 focus on it.
01:56 After that I just started drinking for a way to get through it really, which ended up with
02:02 me passing out on the bouncy castle at the end of the night because I had drunk way too
02:06 much alcohol.
02:07 And although I did enjoy the day, I don't feel I was particularly present.
02:11 I didn't really have a conversation with anybody, I would say hi to people and then I was running
02:15 around doing things.
02:16 I don't really remember most of my wedding because I was just so stressed and burnt out
02:22 and then drunk.
02:27 I got home, I burst into tears, I went to bed and I didn't get out of bed for days.
02:33 I just, this pure physical exhaustion.
02:37 I could function but my brain just was not working.
02:40 I could only think of what I had to do in that minute.
02:43 I couldn't respond to messages, I couldn't talk to people, I could barely have a conversation
02:48 with Ian.
02:52 I tried to talk to a couple of people, a couple of friends and they didn't understand.
02:56 They said, "Oh yeah, the wedding blues, you know, it happens to everybody."
02:59 They just dismissed it.
03:01 We are conditioned to only talk about the good stuff and not the bad stuff because the
03:05 bad stuff is shameful.
03:06 I saw stuff about weddings and I was like, "Well, I want that because that looks really
03:10 nice and I want to experience that."
03:12 But then social media is a projection.
03:15 It's a projection of what we want other people to see.
03:18 It's rare to find authenticity within social media.
03:23 I found a community of people who could relate.
03:25 You know, it's all about it looking nice and shiny on Instagram and not actually the
03:31 reality.
03:32 I know that I'm not alone in how I feel.
03:34 [Music]