The Verge's Nilay Patel, David Pierce, and Alex Cranz choose their picks for The Vergecast Streaming Draft of 2024 in front of a live audience at SXSW.
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00:00Hello and welcome to the RoachCast, the flagship podcast of South by Southwest.
00:07Sucking another South by Southwest podcast.
00:10Yeah.
00:11We're the only one.
00:12Yeah.
00:13You just got to take it.
00:14Yeah.
00:15You just got to take it and have it.
00:16I'm your friend, Neely.
00:17That's Alex Kranz.
00:18Hey, I'm your friend who's very happy to be in Texas.
00:20Yeah.
00:21Woohoo.
00:22Alex is from Texas.
00:23It's true.
00:24That's why I wore my little cowboy boots today.
00:25Where's your hat?
00:27It's up in Fort Worth.
00:28Where's your pickup truck?
00:30Also in Fort Worth.
00:31Sorry.
00:32Very good.
00:33David Pierce is here.
00:34I have no cowboy hats.
00:35I wore a cowboy hat one time and literally a stranger told me I looked stupid in it.
00:39That's a true story.
00:40I think you'd look cute in one.
00:42They were like trying to be nice, but it was very much a like, honey, like that's not
00:46for you.
00:47Take it off.
00:48Kind of vibe.
00:49And I just, that was the end of my cowboy hat face.
00:50It's fair.
00:51It's fair.
00:52Were you wearing it in a cowboy hat appropriate situation?
00:53Evidently not.
00:54Were you like at the bank?
00:55Yeah.
00:56I was in Austin.
00:57That's cowboy hat appropriate.
00:58Yeah.
01:00That's true.
01:01New York?
01:02No.
01:03No.
01:04Austin?
01:05Kind of.
01:06Fort Worth?
01:07Definitely.
01:08So you can see that Texas is coming out of Alex now.
01:09We're learning things here.
01:10This is good.
01:11All right.
01:12So here's what we're going to do for this live virtual cast.
01:13By the way, if you're listening to this in your car, we have an audience here at Southwest
01:14Southwest.
01:15Make some noise, audience.
01:16Very good.
01:17I'm very excited for this ridiculous gimmick that David has come up with.
01:22David, explain what we're going to do and we're going to play this game that David's
01:26come up with and at the end we'll have some questions, but explain the game.
01:29Okay.
01:30So about a year ago, we were trying to figure out how to talk about the streaming world
01:35and like who's up, who's down, who's winning, who's losing.
01:37So we did this draft and we all basically picked a bunch of streaming services that
01:41are like ours for the year.
01:44And then everything changed like immediately between recording that episode and putting
01:47out that episode, the whole streaming world changed.
01:50So now we're going to do it again and we're going to go back.
01:53I've made it more complicated and it's going to be much more work for everybody and I'm
01:57the only one who can see everything, so I'm going to win for sure.
02:00David's going to cheat.
02:01Yeah, he's cheating.
02:02But we need help from all of you a few times throughout this.
02:06First telling us who is going to pick first.
02:09I'm going to explain the rules of the draft in a second, but the first thing we need to
02:12do is I'm going to recap last year and then y'all are going to decide who won last year's
02:17draft and thus gets to go first.
02:18Does that sound good?
02:19Okay, cool.
02:20So last year, Nilay Patel ended up, we each ended up with five things.
02:25Nilay had TikTok, the Disney bundle, YouTube TV with Sunday ticket, Apple music, and his
02:31friend Vipin's Plex server, aka right to jail.
02:36I didn't pick Alex's weirdo Plex server.
02:38It's way better.
02:39Yeah.
02:40Uh, Alex Kranz picked HBO max, Paramount plus slash showtime, channels, the app for watching
02:50the internet.
02:51That one's good.
02:52Criterion.
02:53It still exists.
02:56And then Alex got a bonus pick because she spent the least money and she picked Xbox
03:00cloud gaming, which was a choice.
03:02Uh, it was a very entertaining pick.
03:05I like everything.
03:06I would, I would, I would pick all of those again in 2023.
03:09I don't recommend that.
03:10Uh, my picks were YouTube premium, Peacock, Netflix, discovery plus, womp womp, and Hulu
03:17with live TV.
03:18So I won.
03:19I know I just said a lot of things all in a row.
03:22Uh, who thinks Nilay won the draft?
03:25Nothing.
03:26Yes.
03:27Yes.
03:28In your face.
03:29Because I talked to him.
03:30Oh shit.
03:31Who thinks Alex won the draft?
03:32Yes.
03:33Come on, chair.
03:34Yes.
03:35I saw that.
03:36I brought ringers.
03:37Oh my God.
03:38He's, David's definitely.
03:39Uh, who thinks David won the draft?
03:4280 drum and clap for me.
03:45So I won the draft.
03:46Okay.
03:47So the rules of this draft, Alex, you're going to get to go first cause I think you
03:55actually won the draft.
03:56Thank you.
03:57Nilay, Nilay came in last.
03:58That's the most important part.
04:00Nilay lost.
04:01It was brutal.
04:02So for this year, the, the new addition to the draft is we have categories and you can't
04:06just pick anything.
04:07You have to fill the categories with draft picks and we have six categories.
04:11Like I said, this is going to be very complicated.
04:14You both have this on your phone, so you can check it as you'd like to.
04:16Can I have my phone out?
04:17The categories are cheap, which means it has to have a tier that costs under 10 bucks.
04:23Uh, awards, which means the streaming service has to have won an Oscar, an Oscar, not something
04:27else, an Oscar.
04:29There's 4k, which is pretty self explanatory.
04:31It has to have stuff in 4k live, which means it has to have some live stuff niche, which
04:35means it has to be something very specific.
04:38Uh, and we can litigate that as we can.
04:39The Alex Kranz category.
04:42And then there's wildcard, which is anything you want.
04:44Yeah.
04:45So it's not going in category order, but there are going to be six rounds of the draft and
04:48it is your job to fill out all six categories over the course of the draft.
04:52Oh my God.
04:53Sound good.
04:54Everybody feel good?
04:55Yeah.
04:56All right.
04:57Alex Kranz.
04:58You're up first.
04:59So you have to pick a service and a category.
05:00Okay.
05:01I'm going to go 4k for my first one and I'm going to choose Netflix because I've gotten
05:04really into K dramas and they've got a lot on there and also other, it's Netflix.
05:09So here's my proposed wildcard addition to this draft.
05:13Oh good.
05:14If anyone says a streaming service, we have to rank how close to death the streaming services
05:19on the go 90 scale of doom stream because it turns out several of them last year were
05:23very close.
05:24Very close.
05:25Yeah.
05:26So if you are in our audience, you don't know what the go 90 scale of doom streaming services
05:28is.
05:29Uh, Verizon, which is a cell phone carrier launched, just important fact along this road
05:37launched a competitor YouTube called go 90.
05:39This is ages ago.
05:41The competitor featured the ability to turn your phone sideways to watch videos and landscape,
05:45which Verizon tried to brand going 90.
05:48This is a real thing that happened from one of our nation's largest companies.
05:52They also had features in it called like join a crew because they thought the youth would
05:56like a gang related terminology in their video apps.
05:59This is all real.
06:00I'm not making this up.
06:01No.
06:02Uh, it quickly, it quickly failed.
06:03Like I can't even tell you how fast it failed.
06:05It went 90.
06:06Yeah.
06:07So this is going to be another service that was predicated on turning your phone to watch
06:11videos and landscape.
06:12So we have the go 90 scale of doom streaming services.
06:15So zero is alive.
06:1790 is dead.
06:20It's a radio show.
06:21So it doesn't matter that I got the hand directions wrong when I did that.
06:23The audience saw just whatever in your mind.
06:26Zero is alive.
06:27Zero is alive.
06:2890 is dead.
06:29So Alex, where is Netflix on the go 90 scale of doom streaming service?
06:34Okay.
06:35I'm about to be really honest.
06:36I actually only picked it.
06:37So neither of you could pick it because I asked a lot of gamesmanship in this room.
06:41Yeah.
06:42It's, it's all about beating them and feeling good about myself.
06:45So I actually think it's like a 40 because I, because I think they have a lot of programming
06:49problems and they need to improve it.
06:51Like I like the K dramas, but I don't know if everyone else likes the, but Alex, I would
06:56remind you that the scale is not like the, the suckiness scale of its program, the scale
07:02of does it exist in a year?
07:05Yeah.
07:06You don't have to say in a year.
07:07Is it like, yeah.
07:08Does it exist?
07:09How close to death in this moment?
07:10Right.
07:11Hmm.
07:12I still think like 40, I kind of want to say 40 I I'm, I'm out there like, I think Netflix
07:17has some issues.
07:18I feel like this moment in time, it's appropriate to do our disclosures, a Netflix show.
07:26Very good.
07:27It's called the future of you should watch it.
07:29Our company has a significant investment in it from NBC universal, which is owned by Comcast.
07:34They don't like us very much at all.
07:36Given our coverage of Comcast we make other television shows for other services at our
07:41company and I personally watch television.
07:45Yes.
07:46Quite a bit.
07:47Alex does too, but only illegally.
07:50So it's fine.
07:51Yeah.
07:52Yeah.
07:53I don't have to disclose that.
07:54Yeah.
07:55We all have Apple products.
07:56It's a very important disclosure.
07:57Go ahead.
07:58All right.
07:59I'll let you go next because I'm feeling magnanimous today.
08:01What's your first verse serpentine order?
08:03Yeah.
08:04All right.
08:05I'm starting.
08:06I'm starting where I started last year.
08:07Tick tock.
08:08Tick tock is a notably cheap.
08:09Okay.
08:10It's funded entirely by subsidies from the Chinese government and extremely crap garbage
08:16that is sold on a tick tock.
08:17You did see the ban bill that was passed.
08:20Oh yeah.
08:21Tick tock currently in the last 29.
08:22Tick tock is about at an 89.
08:26Okay.
08:27It is the close.
08:28It is the most alive thing that has ever been that close to death in the history of streaming
08:31services.
08:32The most alive.
08:34Okay.
08:35Right.
08:36Sure.
08:37It is the whole go 90 scale all at once.
08:38Yeah.
08:39It is the full spectrum of going 90.
08:40Okay.
08:41Have you ever seen those tick tocks where it's like turn your phone slowly as the plane
08:44flies?
08:45It's that.
08:46It's that thing.
08:47Can I, this fact about tick tock today is to me very funny.
08:51The center for just had this reporting.
08:53So tick tock had a full screen unkillable splash screen on load.
08:58That's a call your representative yesterday.
09:02And the only things you could do were force quit the app or call your representative.
09:07You had no other choices.
09:08Like if you wanted to engage with tick tock, those are your choices.
09:11So Capitol Hill was flooded with calls from angry teens.
09:14And there was one quote from one congressional office.
09:18Our offices are flooded with calls from angry teens and boomers who spend all day on the
09:23app.
09:25Really expands the definition of tick tock there.
09:26I just love a bunch of teens being like, this is the first phone call I've made in my life.
09:30Yeah.
09:32I need this.
09:34So you would think that this would work.
09:36Other apps have famously done this.
09:38Uber famously did this to get preferential treatment in cities around the world during
09:42the Uber time.
09:44This utterly backfired on tick tock.
09:47Congressional Republicans, the bill sailed through to basically punish app stores that
09:51they carry tick tock.
09:52That's how they're going to do it.
09:54They're saying this stuff that congressional Republicans say, China's bad in the accent.
10:00And the quote they gave to Semaphore was, we're worried the Chinese government is programming
10:04our teenager's minds, and this is proof.
10:07Because they got all the teens to call.
10:09I mean, it's very good.
10:13The teens did call.
10:14They did.
10:15They did program the teens to call.
10:16And for some reason they're all speaking Mandarin.
10:18It's very confusing.
10:19Yeah, it's crazy.
10:20Anyway, so it's at 89, but I'm taking it first off the board.
10:23I feel good about it.
10:24Okay.
10:25Fair enough.
10:26I'm torn.
10:27Did Apple TV won an Oscar?
10:28It did.
10:29That's a thing that happened.
10:30Yeah.
10:31Okay.
10:32I'm going to take Apple TV plus in the awards category for my first pick.
10:33I hate you, but good.
10:34I think there's a decent chance that is going to be the most complicated category because
10:35it turns out not a lot of Oscars in those.
10:36So I'm taking that one.
10:37On the go 90 scale, it's like a six.
10:38Yeah.
10:39Like it's Apple just has all the money in the universe.
10:40Yeah.
10:41It's like a six.
10:42Yeah.
10:43Yeah.
10:44Yeah.
10:45Yeah.
10:46Yeah.
10:47Yeah.
10:48Yeah.
10:49Yeah.
10:50Yeah.
10:51Yeah.
10:52Yeah.
10:53Yeah.
10:54Yeah.
10:55Yeah.
10:56Yeah.
10:57Yeah.
10:58Yeah.
10:59So Apple is in the universe and Eddie Q just like hangs out in LA and does whatever he
11:01wants.
11:02Yeah.
11:03Yeah.
11:04Tim Cook likes Ted Lasso.
11:05Yeah.
11:06He's like friends with Lionel Messi now.
11:07That's like it's great.
11:08Yeah.
11:09I will say that Apple keeps claiming that its movies make money and they definitely
11:12don't.
11:13Well, it was great because there was a . . .
11:14They do make money, just they don't profit.
11:15Not enough.
11:16Yeah.
11:17And it was one of those things where they were like, we spent all this money on a handful
11:21of huge movies, Killers of Flower Moon, and a couple of others.
11:25famously invested like $700 million into a few movies.
11:29And they're like, but they're super profitable.
11:30And there were a bunch of people who were like,
11:31you know we can see the box office data, right?
11:33Like it's just right there.
11:35And it's just adding three numbers
11:37that don't come anywhere near $700 million.
11:40But like, whatever, Apple's fine.
11:42Apple's fine.
11:43I'm not worried about Apple TV Plus
11:45making a profit for Apple.
11:46We'll say that everyone says it's the best one,
11:48like people really like it.
11:49It's the new HBO.
11:50And my fundamental belief is like some things are very good
11:54and then the things that are very bad
11:55are some of the most comically bad things
11:57anyone has ever spent money on.
11:59Like Apple, you can't open an Apple TV right now
12:01without it being like, you're gonna watch Argyle.
12:03And it's like, no, I'm not.
12:05Like I read the reviews of Argyle.
12:08I've seen other people react to the concept of Argyle.
12:10I saw Argyle in theaters.
12:12What is wrong with me?
12:13I don't know.
12:14You have a child.
12:15Yeah, he was asleep.
12:16It was fine.
12:17Did you pay for a babysitter?
12:19No, I, the honestly-
12:20I went alone.
12:21The honestly true story is-
12:22You see Argyle alone?
12:24Oh my God.
12:26My wife is doing grad school again
12:28because she collects master's degrees.
12:31I had nothing to do while she was in class
12:34and my child was asleep.
12:36And so I was like, I'm gonna go to a movie.
12:37And the literal only thing playing at the time
12:39that I wanted to see it was Argyle.
12:42Should I watch it for free on Apple TV Plus?
12:44This is what I mean.
12:45The hit rate is good.
12:47Argyle is a movie to watch-
12:47It's a solid, consistent.
12:48In like the last 25 minutes of a plane ride.
12:51When you land and you're kind of like,
12:53oh, I should finish that eventually.
12:54And then you never do.
12:55Like that's Argyle.
12:56So, okay, I've had this idea.
12:57Tell me if this is a good idea or a bad idea.
12:59We review movies.
13:00It's the thing we do at The Verge.
13:01And that's fine.
13:02And most movies are reviewed on like the tomato meter scale
13:05or like five stars.
13:07I have a long thought.
13:08We need to build a product that just tells you
13:10where to watch a movie, right?
13:13That's the actual ranking.
13:14It's like, should you spend money on this in the future?
13:16You mean like physically in the world?
13:17Should you physically take your body to Argyle alone
13:19while your child is sleeping?
13:22See, answered right there.
13:23Should you wait to pay for it when you can buy it
13:25or rent it in the first window?
13:29That's for Argyle.
13:30It's like a hard nose.
13:30What's at the bottom of that?
13:31Like on your phone, five minutes at a time at Starbucks.
13:37In one minute clips on TikTok.
13:39Yes, perfect.
13:41Wouldn't this be like vastly more useful than star ratings?
13:44If I was just like,
13:45this movie is good enough to watch on a jet blue flight
13:49where you're a little bit hungover.
13:52That's all the, we're gonna roll this out.
13:54Okay, wait, now I wanna know,
13:55what is the movie that you've seen the most of
13:57exclusively in one minute TikTok clips?
13:59Moneyball.
14:00The TikTok algorithm is like,
14:02you are gonna watch Moneyball today.
14:04Is it Sully?
14:05Is that what it's called?
14:06The one where Sully lands the plane?
14:07With the plane?
14:08I think it is Sully, yeah.
14:09I never learned because I only see it.
14:11That is a hard movie to watch in one minute clip.
14:13Yeah, they only wanna show me like the plane landing
14:17over and over again.
14:18Similarly, I get a lot of flight with Denzel Washington.
14:22Which is a very intense movie
14:23to watch in the form of one minute TikTok clips.
14:26I'm just gonna call it.
14:27Mine is real steel, by the way.
14:28The one where Hugh Jackman fights robots.
14:30Perfect.
14:31Can I call it just my favorite new podcast right now?
14:33There's a producer, Esplanation,
14:35who has a podcast called The Irishman.
14:37I don't know if you ever finished this product,
14:38this project, but he was watching all of The Irishman,
14:43which is a three and a half hour movie
14:45in one minute increments,
14:47and then making a four minute podcast
14:49about that every single day.
14:52And he calls them mins,
14:54and he's like, this min was really hard to watch.
14:56And it's like, he only watched a min?
15:01It is unclear whether he's gonna do
15:02Killers of the Flower Min.
15:05I want that.
15:06It'll take six months to do that.
15:07I'd love that.
15:08Okay, are we snake drafting,
15:10or are we going back to the top?
15:12Snake drafting.
15:13Snake draft, all right, so I get to go again.
15:14Wait, I hate this.
15:15I know, this is great news for me.
15:16Let's see.
15:17I'm gonna go to the live category,
15:19and I'm gonna pick Amazon Prime Video.
15:22Which is football, which is live.
15:23So I'm gonna pick that.
15:23Oh, that's good, okay.
15:24Wait, are you doing with the $3.99?
15:27Yeah, are you doing ads or no ads?
15:28Yeah, ads or no ads?
15:29Ads.
15:30I'm fine with ads.
15:31Okay.
15:31It's because you're buying it for football.
15:33Not fine with the ads on the Fire TV,
15:36where you turn on your TV,
15:37and it's like, would you like to watch some ads?
15:39No thank you.
15:40But you're taking it for football.
15:42No, I get it because of football,
15:44but I'm taking it because, frankly,
15:46of Mr. and Mrs. Smith, which picks ads,
15:47and I would like that show to go on.
15:48So you're backing into the category,
15:51because there's like one low-rent AFC game a week.
15:53That's it, okay.
15:54Perfect, Al Michaels gets me this one.
15:56This is an ad.
15:56So I'm happy.
15:57There you go.
15:58I'll allow it.
15:59Thank you.
16:00And I now have the two that are never gonna die,
16:02because they're funded by billionaires who don't care.
16:04It's perfect.
16:05It's fair.
16:06Fair enough, okay.
16:07There's only one more of those left on this list.
16:08We'll come back to that, it's gonna be all right.
16:11Wait, how does the serpentine, does this mean?
16:13That means kneel eyes up.
16:14I hate this.
16:15And then you get two in a row.
16:15Okay, yes.
16:17Do you get ever in a row?
16:21You get none in a row.
16:22So you really do.
16:23We actually deliberately did this to screw over Neely.
16:25Okay, then it's all great.
16:27But don't tell him we said that.
16:28I'm still gonna win this draft.
16:29Yeah, we'll see.
16:30I'm gonna do it with my next pick,
16:32which is the Disney bundle, which is unbeatable.
16:35Wait, what is the Disney bundle?
16:36Is it Disney and ESPN and Hulu?
16:39Yeah, and in India, Hotstar.
16:42Okay.
16:42The cricket stands out there.
16:43Yeah.
16:44Do we allow bundles?
16:46I feel like bundles shouldn't be allowed.
16:48It's hard to buy Disney
16:49without Bob Iger coming to your house
16:50and being like, you're gonna get Hulu.
16:52Just take it.
16:53That's actually sort of true.
16:54It is genuinely easier to get the bundle.
16:56Also, Hulu's now integrated into the Disney app itself.
16:58You know, the app for families.
17:00It's like, here's the Handmaid's Tale.
17:01Yeah.
17:02But what are you taking it for?
17:03Are you taking it for live?
17:04Or are you taking it?
17:05Oh yeah, what's your category?
17:06We're taking it for Bluey.
17:08It's dead ahead.
17:09That's not a category.
17:10I just built an insane home theater in our house.
17:14Can I talk about this?
17:14For Bluey?
17:15For Bluey.
17:16Like, what is watched in this thing is Bluey.
17:20It's very good.
17:21Okay.
17:22All right.
17:22Can I, Max rolls up to the TV,
17:25huge TV on the wall,
17:26and she tries to scroll it,
17:28which is wild,
17:29because it's bigger than her.
17:30Oh wow.
17:31So she's just like, come on.
17:32What does she think is gonna happen?
17:34She thinks I'm gonna use the remote,
17:37and then get what she wants.
17:39That's, she's five.
17:41That's good.
17:42Fair enough.
17:42By the way, Disney is, I believe,
17:43at a 30 on the Go90 scale.
17:46The whole bundle?
17:47Disney.
17:48I'm putting all of Disney.
17:50The company.
17:50Okay.
17:51The company.
17:52And that's 10 for,
17:53no one knows what's going on with Marvel.
17:56Just some weird stuff there.
17:5910 for no one,
18:00they've got a big debt load with Hulu
18:02and all this other stuff.
18:02They gotta do that.
18:03And then 10,
18:05because Max made me watch a series of movies
18:07called The Descendants.
18:11Get out.
18:12Get out of here.
18:14Oh, that's Kate.
18:15That's the editor-in-chief of Wired, everybody.
18:20I don't know.
18:22They're horrible.
18:23These are the worst movies I've ever seen.
18:24I'm sorry, Katie.
18:25They're the worst.
18:26They're so bad.
18:28It's the villains of Disney movies
18:30all have had children,
18:32and then they dance fight to bring their cities together.
18:35No, that sounds great.
18:36And they made three of these things.
18:37Wait, is that the one they made after the Hunger Games?
18:39And they were like,
18:40this is kind of like that,
18:41and then it was awful,
18:42and they were like,
18:43don't worry, we're gonna make a bunch more.
18:44I don't wanna talk about it.
18:44That's the rest of this podcast.
18:47It's just, it's horrible.
18:49It's hard pivoting to Descendants 4.
18:52It's very bad,
18:53and that, to me,
18:54I think moves Disney closer to death than not.
18:56I do feel like you have to add like
18:58five or six more points for just like,
19:00Bob Iger might literally just burn it down on the way out.
19:03He might be like,
19:04I'm actually retiring this time,
19:05and just torch Disney.
19:07Just Angela Bassett, the.
19:08Yeah, exactly.
19:10Okay, well, what category do you want that in?
19:12I believe it qualifies for everything you have available
19:15except for niche, because.
19:17Yeah, it's definitely not niche.
19:19I'm gonna put Disney,
19:20the bundle in awards.
19:22I think the awards category is the hardest to fill.
19:24That's my feeling.
19:25Hulu won an Oscar.
19:27You can have it.
19:29I believe Disney,
19:30the Disney Corporation has.
19:31Not Disney Plus, though.
19:34I don't think any Disney Plus originals
19:36are tearing it up at the award shows, right?
19:38Oh, come on.
19:39High School Musical, the musical,
19:40the series, crushing it.
19:41Give it a sound design Oscar.
19:44Hand those out like candy.
19:45That's probably true.
19:46All right, Alex, you get two picks now.
19:47Okay, I get two picks.
19:49I've done 4K.
19:50Correct.
19:51So I need cheap.
19:52So for cheap, I'm gonna go Peacock.
19:55Okay.
19:55Because they got the live stuff.
19:57Yep.
19:58You could watch the State of the Union
19:59if you wanted to on Peacock.
20:00You got the Olympics are coming and stuff like that.
20:03That's true, it's actually a good year to have Peacock.
20:04And it's like, it's mad cheap.
20:06Okay.
20:06It is very affordable.
20:08But for.
20:08It's also where I watch Parks and Recreation.
20:10So it's very important to my life.
20:12Yeah, I know, this was again,
20:14I knew you had picked it last year.
20:15So I wanted to.
20:16It was gonna be my next pick.
20:18That was right there.
20:18Thank you for that.
20:19I got you.
20:20And then, ooh, what are the other categories again?
20:23You still have Awards, Live, Niche, and Wildcard.
20:26See, those are all so easy to fill, I feel like.
20:29One substantially less so.
20:32I'm gonna save Awards for last.
20:34I've got one in the pocket for Awards.
20:36Okay.
20:37But I'm gonna go Niche this time.
20:40I'm gonna go Crunchyroll.
20:42Ooh.
20:43Did you rank your last one?
20:44Oh no, I have to rank it.
20:45You're right, you're right.
20:46Peacock, ooh, I think that's like a 20.
20:5120?
20:52Yeah.
20:53You think Netflix is more likely to die than Peacock?
20:55Yeah.
20:56You think Disney is more likely to die than Peacock?
20:59Peacock is in danger of just directly
21:01being forgotten about.
21:02Yeah, but it's growing.
21:04Just straight up, the Roberts family that owns Comcast
21:06is like, we did Peacock, who named this?
21:08Yeah, nobody knows it exists, but it's still like there.
21:11I think it's like the sixth most subscribed
21:15platform right now, or streaming platform.
21:17So people are doing it.
21:19Mainly it's David and other people
21:21who wanna watch Parks and Rec.
21:22Yeah.
21:23And so, yeah.
21:24And I feel like Parks and Rec is really gonna
21:26let it survive in a way that Netflix can't
21:28because Netflix doesn't own it.
21:29Just a direct subscription to Parks and Rec.
21:31Yeah, yeah.
21:33First of all, I would pay for that for the rest of my life.
21:35Same.
21:36But also Netflix has Suits,
21:38Nila's favorite show on television.
21:40I'm gonna start hissing at you.
21:41I don't know if I've told this story on the podcast.
21:45I have a niece and nephew there in college.
21:46They're doing great.
21:47And they hit their first exams
21:48in their freshman year of college.
21:49And my niece, she wants to do forensics.
21:53So she's a chem major.
21:55She texted me and said, what's law school like?
21:58Because she had encountered her first chem exams.
22:02And I was like, what is going on here?
22:04This is hard, but don't go to law school.
22:05First of all, just like blanket advice.
22:07And she's like, well, I've been watching a lot of Suits.
22:09And I was like, this is a danger to America.
22:13Like this dumb show is single-handedly
22:17taking women out of STEM.
22:18The point of the show is that
22:20the guy doesn't go to law school.
22:22Yeah.
22:23So why would you want to go to law school watching?
22:25The point of the show is also that it rots your brain
22:27and soul every passing minute.
22:30So I just like Suits.
22:31I don't have to come through.
22:33You love it.
22:34I've watched several episodes of the show.
22:35The other thing everybody should know
22:36is Nila auditioned for Suits and didn't get it.
22:38We're the Meghan Markle role, actually.
22:41It was a weird callback.
22:42I could see you in it.
22:44I was like, can you fit in this dress?
22:44And I was like, not at all.
22:45Just a little.
22:47All right, so that was Peacock.
22:49So we like hard diverged into Suits.
22:51Yeah, sorry, sorry.
22:52So Peacock you think is less close to death than Netflix.
22:56Yeah, because Peacock is an entertainment company.
22:58Like I fully believe that companies
23:02that are built on entertainment
23:03are going to have their streaming services
23:05probably survive longer than the companies
23:08who are built around tech.
23:09Because the tech companies are trying to
23:12make art like technology.
23:14And that's just, there's a lot of similarities
23:17between those two.
23:18But there's a lot of things that are not similar.
23:20Yeah, Netflix is like,
23:21can we algorithmically recreate a movie?
23:23Right, and that's dumb.
23:25Whereas Peacock's like, can we make Poker Face?
23:28And that's cool.
23:29I mean, four people watched it.
23:30I was one of them.
23:31But I've had a bunch of people in the crowd.
23:33It's very good, though.
23:33Yeah, Poker Face was great.
23:35That's the only one that I could remember.
23:35Where the audience in the car,
23:37there was dead silence from the crowd.
23:39Shh.
23:40Shh.
23:42We can put that in post.
23:43We can put that in post.
23:45But yeah.
23:46In post.
23:48Yeah, I fully believe in Peacock.
23:50All right, Crunchyroll.
23:51Go 90s scale.
23:52Crunchyroll, ooh, that one's harder.
23:54Because they just are like,
23:56they're killing off a lot of stuff over there, right?
23:58Every time Zaslav notices he owns a company,
24:01he's like.
24:03No, Crunchyroll is Sony.
24:04That's the animator.
24:05Is it owned by Sony?
24:06Sony.
24:06And Sony merged it with a company.
24:08This is a real name of a company.
24:10Funimation.
24:11Oh yeah, Funimation's from my hometown.
24:12Super cool.
24:13Can you imagine the meeting where they had to decide
24:15whether to keep Crunchyroll or Funimation?
24:18It's very good.
24:19So yeah, Sony owns both of them.
24:20They merged them together.
24:21They got rid of the digital purchases.
24:23That was a big outroar, one of those words.
24:26So Crunchyroll, but they're just on Macs then.
24:29They just have a license.
24:30Yeah, they're doing the distribution thing.
24:31Okay, well, ooh.
24:33That changes it a little on the Go 90s scale, right?
24:36If there doesn't have the Spectre.
24:37Well, it depends on how much you think
24:39touching HBO Max immediately brings you closer to death.
24:43Like, if you acknowledge HBO Max,
24:45are you closer to death?
24:46That's true, that's true.
24:47So 10 points because it was on HBO Max,
24:50so it's been acknowledged by that.
24:5210 points because it's owned by Sony,
24:53and Sony also often forgets it owns things.
24:56And then 10 points for the weebs.
24:59I'm a weeb, I'm sorry.
25:01I hope that's not a whole lot.
25:02So you're commenting at 40?
25:04No, I'm at 30.
25:05That's just 30.
25:06All right, okay.
25:07So it's a 30.
25:08You're still less likely to die than Netflix.
25:10Yeah, exactly.
25:11This all makes perfect sense.
25:12Anime fans are hardcore.
25:13Yeah, they are hardcore.
25:14Sure.
25:15Here's a shot.
25:16We just had the president of Crunchyroll in Decoder,
25:19and he was like, we're ready to go.
25:20He was very excited about anime.
25:22That thing started for just people
25:24who wanted to pirate anime from overseas.
25:28And then they were like,
25:28what if we just make ourselves legit?
25:30What if we sold it to them instead?
25:31And they did, and it's like, cool, that's awesome.
25:33I support you, Crunchyroll.
25:35All right.
25:36I love it.
25:37All right, Nila, you're up.
25:38You're on my list here.
25:40All right, I'm gonna fill out 4K last.
25:42Okay.
25:43I feel very confident that I can fill out 4K last
25:46and get ahead.
25:46So I'm gonna go with Wildcard.
25:49Okay.
25:49And I am picking HBO Max, my friends.
25:52First of all, it's just called Max.
25:53Well, if you wanna pick HBO Max, that's fine.
25:55Yeah, yeah.
25:55I'm actually good with that.
25:56I take it back.
25:57You can pick HBO Max.
25:58I refuse to call the streaming service
25:59by the name of my daughter.
26:00We're going full Warner Brothers owned
26:04and affiliated HBO Max.
26:06Okay.
26:06You know, the whole name.
26:08By the way, Dave and I, do you have your tote bags?
26:09Who's got, who picked the Paramount?
26:11Let me say this for the audience, the car.
26:13When you come to South by Southwest,
26:14you register and they give you a tote bag.
26:16The tote bags are sponsored by Paramount Plus
26:19and by HBO Max.
26:20Yeah.
26:21So you get to pick one or the other.
26:22Everybody has to pick one.
26:24Who picked the Paramount Plus one in this room?
26:26I think you know who on stage.
26:27Five people.
26:28Who picked the HBO Max one?
26:30That's everyone.
26:31Wow.
26:32People holding them up.
26:33So Dave and I got our tote bags.
26:34Like 90% for Max.
26:38So we asked all of the people getting out of the tote bags
26:40and they all try to be really diplomatic.
26:42They're like, it's about half and half with the HBO Max.
26:46And then one woman, this is a real thing.
26:48This is reporting.
26:49You cannot cancel me for this.
26:50This is a quote.
26:51I'm a little worried about this quote.
26:53Oh no.
26:54I was there for this.
26:54I can vouch for this.
26:55This is a true thing that was said to us.
26:56And then I just backed away from this situation.
26:59One of them said to us,
27:01the ladies are taking the Paramount one
27:03because the logo is prettier.
27:05Ooh.
27:07I didn't say that.
27:08I didn't make that up.
27:09Someone else said that to me.
27:09I'm just reporting to you what was said.
27:10And I guarantee you this was said to us
27:13just to even out the idea
27:15that everyone was taking the HBO Max bag.
27:17Yes.
27:17Ooh.
27:18Because the first person was like, oh yeah,
27:19it's the Max ones.
27:20And then was like, well, no, I mean, it's like, it's fine.
27:22They're both great.
27:23It's like 50-50.
27:24Don't worry.
27:25Don't even worry about it.
27:26And then there was somebody two seats down who was like,
27:26what if I make some shit up about the logo being prettier?
27:30That was like very much how this was going.
27:32Anyway, I took the HBO Max bag to give to my daughter Max
27:35and then promptly forgot it.
27:36So.
27:37Aw.
27:38That's fine.
27:39Oh, she'll be fine.
27:39She knows.
27:40I hope so.
27:42HBO Max, by the way, also at an 80
27:44on the Go90 scale of Doom streaming services.
27:47How do you measure that?
27:49How do you get those points?
27:51Well, I don't think you have to add them up.
27:52That 80 is a real vibe.
27:54Yeah.
27:55That's just the looming presence of David Zaslav
27:56in his decision-making.
27:58He just looks over and he's like, what's that?
27:59Chill it.
28:00HBO Max, as you know,
28:03a product of a doomed merger with AT&T
28:06in which AT&T convinced a federal judge
28:08that this was quote a vision deal
28:10and that the vision was they would put short versions
28:13of Game of Thrones on Android phones.
28:16Oh yeah.
28:17That would have ruled.
28:18And our nation's justice system looked at this
28:20and was like, sick.
28:22Yeah, because it would have been cool.
28:23It's like a real thing that happened.
28:25Do you ever say a sentence out loud
28:26and be like, that can't possibly be true.
28:28Like there's no way that thing I just said is real.
28:30It's super happened.
28:32They're like, the vision is we're gonna preload stuff
28:35on mid-range Android phones
28:36and it's gonna be Game of Thrones clips.
28:38That didn't pan out as many of you may have noticed.
28:42It all fell apart.
28:43They've got an enormous amount of debt.
28:46And what they have is a lot of AT&T customers
28:49who can't quit HBO Max.
28:51I'm one of these people.
28:52I'm grandfathered into an HBO Max plan.
28:55And so I cannot put this in the 4K category
28:59because my AT&T account no longer knows about HBO Max
29:03and I can't leave whatever version of the service
29:06I'm currently subscribed to, which no longer has 4K.
29:09That sounds right.
29:11These are some of the biggest,
29:13most sophisticated companies in our country.
29:16And they're like, our database forgot about you.
29:19Yeah.
29:20But they'll keep charging you.
29:21Don't worry about that.
29:22They will keep charging you.
29:23They're definitely gonna keep charging me.
29:24So I believe, yeah, the wild card.
29:26Would the 4K have even been good though?
29:28I mean, for Max, excuse me, HBO Max?
29:31No, no, no, no, definitely not.
29:33It would have been bad.
29:34Bad app.
29:36I watched, what's the one where they fight?
29:39Let them fight?
29:40Godzilla.
29:43That's not how my brain works.
29:44I'd watched that in their version of Atmos Envision.
29:48And it was like, what if we do this at two bits per second?
29:51Yeah.
29:52It was just like a series of shapes and colors and noises.
29:54Beautiful.
29:55Like a baby toy was just like happening.
29:57And then the one guy was like, let them fight.
29:59It was good.
29:59That's how you want to experience Godzilla.
30:00Love that, yeah.
30:02All right, I can't believe no one has picked YouTube yet.
30:04I feel obligated to pick YouTube.
30:07Which I'm-
30:07YouTube, wait, YouTube TV or YouTube Premium?
30:09Well, so I'm gonna put YouTube in cheap, so neither.
30:11Oh, and you're on full YouTube with ads.
30:14I'm getting all the ads.
30:15Like, every single ad you can imagine,
30:17I'm gonna watch it.
30:18That is the worst choice on this list.
30:19I'm gonna watch- Love it.
30:19YouTube with ads is the worst choice on this list.
30:22No, I disagree.
30:23We'll see.
30:23That's a good choice.
30:24That's how I watch YouTube now.
30:26I'm logged in.
30:27So I get recommendations.
30:28All right.
30:29But I have to watch all the ads.
30:31I get mad at people who have ads now on YouTube.
30:33That's a thing that has happened recently.
30:35But I'll get over it.
30:37Win the draft, I will get over it.
30:38I think YouTube Premium is the best deal in streaming.
30:40Yes, I agree with that.
30:41But I don't get to have it.
30:42You're going ads.
30:43I'm going YouTube.
30:45You're just going straight American cheese.
30:47Other cheeses are available, but just-
30:49Nope.
30:49Slices in the mouth, all right.
30:50Just want it, just give it to me.
30:52Okay, so that's the end of round three.
30:53YouTube is a zero on the Go90 scale.
30:56Yeah, it's fine.
30:57I feel very good about that.
30:58It's the only part of Google that feels like
30:59it knows what it's doing.
31:00It might be the only thing left on the internet
31:01at the end of all of this.
31:03It's just YouTube and The Verge, and that'll be it.
31:06It'll be great.
31:07Two websites, very different ideas.
31:12Okay, so we are at the end of round three.
31:13We're halfway through the draft.
31:15Alex so far has Peacock, Netflix, and Crunchyroll.
31:18Nealey has TikTok, The Disney Bundle, and Max.
31:22I have YouTube, Apple TV, and Prime Video.
31:24I think it's very clear who is currently in third place,
31:27but we'll leave that alone for now.
31:29I'm in first.
31:30Wow.
31:31Just wait.
31:32Just wait.
31:33Yeah, we're doing fine.
31:34I'm crushed.
31:35Okay, so for round four, I get to go again,
31:37which I am not prepared for.
31:40What are your leftovers?
31:42Haven't you been cheating this whole time?
31:43No.
31:44Is this just like you hustling us?
31:46You're like, I don't know how to play pool.
31:48He's just moving everything around.
31:49He's giving himself Netflix, giving himself Max.
31:51I did briefly give Nealey two of my picks,
31:53so that was confusing.
31:54You're doing great.
31:55So I have 4K, Niche, and Wildcard left.
31:58Okay.
31:59I can't do any of the 4K ones I know of anymore,
32:02so that's bad.
32:05Does Tubi count as niche?
32:07What do we think?
32:08No.
32:09No.
32:09Tubi is like what happens when you turn on Tubi.
32:11I got a yes from the audience.
32:12That's just, they don't know Tubi.
32:13Tubi is like mainstream free ad-supported.
32:19Alex loves these things.
32:20Yeah, it's just free ad-supported television.
32:22It's got all of the stuff.
32:24You just made that sound very boring and very niche.
32:26That's kind of my point.
32:27No, no, because it's got,
32:28well, no way I can describe it as going to support.
32:31But I'm just saying, like, if you-
32:33Damn it.
32:33No, you're right.
32:34If you're like, if you're one of these boomers
32:36and you get off TikTok,
32:37you're on your eight hours of TikTok in the day,
32:39and you go turn on the cheapest TV
32:41that you bought at Best Buy, you're watching Tubi.
32:44Like, it's just happening to you.
32:45Yeah.
32:46That is probably true.
32:47I don't mean that to denigrate-
32:48You could choose Pluto.
32:49TikTok riddled boomers
32:50that populate the middle of the country.
32:52I am one of them.
32:54I mean to say that that is a thing
32:55that happens on TVs by default,
32:56and that makes it not mainstream.
32:58Fair enough.
32:59All right, well, then I won't take that.
33:00I will take Criterion in-
33:02Yeah, that's much more appropriate.
33:03Yeah, that feels right.
33:05Criterion is like, I don't know.
33:08It's like in the 20s on the scale, I would say.
33:11Like, I want it to continue to exist,
33:13and so do lots of people.
33:14I think Criterion wants it to continue to exist.
33:16But like, maybe all of Criterion will not exist forever.
33:21It feels pretty sustainable, yeah.
33:23There was a really great story recently
33:25about just kind of how sustainable it is
33:27and its whole business.
33:30But isn't the sustainability
33:31like James Cameron wants it to exist?
33:33Yes.
33:34Therefore, it will exist.
33:35Yeah, yeah, yeah, that's fair.
33:36It's like the Letterboxd app,
33:37where like, it'll be fine
33:38because Martin Scorsese uses it.
33:40So like, push comes to shove, it's going to be all right.
33:42All right, so I'm taking Criterion.
33:44That's my pick.
33:45Nila, you're up.
33:47You have three categories remaining.
33:48You have 4K, live, and niche.
33:50Those are your three.
33:51YouTube TV with Sunday Ticket.
33:54I don't think you understand
33:55that I'm just recapitulating my draft
33:56that already won this thing.
33:59You two nerds are like,
34:00what do we do with Discovery Plus?
34:02Like, I'm just like, straight America.
34:04But it didn't win.
34:05Huh?
34:06You didn't win.
34:07Well, yeah, you objectively did.
34:08In fact, I won.
34:10So I'm just coming in again.
34:11I'm just saying.
34:12Alex, I like to think that we have a good relationship.
34:14In this situation,
34:15I would like to just directly gaslight you
34:17and say that I won.
34:18I won.
34:19It's cool.
34:19All right, what are you gonna do?
34:20No, you chose YouTube.
34:21YouTube TV with Sunday Ticket is a straight zero.
34:23Yeah.
34:24Like, you can't,
34:25you're fighting the service that delivers Taylor Swift
34:27and Travis Kelce to millions of Americans every week.
34:30Like, it's fine.
34:31It is the fastest growing cable service in America.
34:34It has the most stuff,
34:36because it's a cable service.
34:37And it has the full backing
34:39of our nation's military slash NFL.
34:42I mean, it bought a decade of football,
34:43which means it bought a decade of video games.
34:45It bought a decade of football.
34:46A decade of football,
34:47which means it bought a decade of existing.
34:48Yeah.
34:49Yeah.
34:50So for 10 years, it's a zero.
34:5211 years.
34:53Or until they break up.
34:54But from the reports I've read,
34:56it suggests that he's in Singapore right now.
34:58So I think things are,
34:59and that, you know,
35:00they both discussed taking the next step.
35:02What do you think?
35:04I'm not following this?
35:05Am I crazy?
35:06I run a culture.
35:07I get it.
35:08He's very handsome.
35:09I think you should change his hair.
35:11Go ahead.
35:12You think you should change it?
35:13Let's talk, let's speak on that.
35:14Let's talk about this fade here.
35:15Say more.
35:16Let's talk about it.
35:17I think you look better with long hair.
35:19What do you want from me?
35:19Do you see Jason's retirement speech?
35:20Do you have any thoughts on that?
35:22Do you see Jason's retirement speech?
35:23Did you do any thoughts?
35:24I did not, no.
35:25It's very good.
35:26It was very good.
35:27A lot of people cried.
35:27It was like 45 minutes long.
35:28Did you watch it with ads on YouTube?
35:30It was like a 45 minute ad,
35:33and then 45 minutes to Jason Kelsey with six mid-rolls.
35:36But I got through it.
35:37Yeah.
35:38You do what you gotta do.
35:39All right, so that's yours.
35:41And I want you to know that I'm giving you YouTube TV
35:43because it is a separate product from YouTube.
35:46Yes.
35:46But if you now try to just be like YouTube TV,
35:48but not Sunday Ticket, no.
35:50Yeah.
35:51Nilay, no.
35:52I don't know what you're arguing with
35:53or who you're arguing with, but you won.
35:55I have played these games with you before.
35:56Yes, and I'm now directly gaslighting you.
36:00There we go.
36:01Okay, Alex, you're up.
36:02You get two now.
36:03Okay, I get to go two in a row again?
36:05You get two picks.
36:05Wow, what's left for me?
36:07How do you not know how this works?
36:08I don't know.
36:09I didn't.
36:10Your three left are Awards, Live, and Wildcard.
36:12Okay, I'm saving Awards for last.
36:14That's tricky.
36:15So Live, I'm gonna go Channels again.
36:17It worked last time.
36:18Explain to the people what Channels is.
36:20Okay, so Channels is an app.
36:21It's like a DVR app.
36:22You can plug it into your cable
36:24if you still subscribe to cable.
36:26You can plug it into an antenna,
36:28and then you just DVR everything.
36:30It also gets all the fast channels.
36:31Yeah, it gets all the fast channels
36:32so you can go and just have your Pluto
36:34and have your Tubi, and then have your ABC
36:38and all of your other.
36:39I think it was you that described it to me
36:40as like an RSS reader for TV,
36:43which I found very compelling.
36:44That's kind of true.
36:44It's like the nerdiest possible thing,
36:46but it's awesome.
36:47And it's sick.
36:48The guy's like very actively developing it.
36:49It's got a really pretty UI.
36:51I just dig the hell out of it.
36:53I use it a lot.
36:54So I'm gonna go with that for my Live
36:56because it gives me all of my Lives,
36:59and then my Wildcard.
37:00I think this one's really obvious.
37:03It's gonna be Paramount because, you know.
37:05Somebody had to.
37:06It's like it's an 89 on the 90 scale.
37:09Yeah, the most 89.
37:10Yeah, Channels is like a zero
37:11because I don't think you can.
37:13You can't kill RSS.
37:14Yeah, you can't kill RSS.
37:15But Paramount Plus is definitely like an 89.
37:19It's as close as you can get
37:22until like they sell it in a couple of weeks or whatever.
37:25So, but yeah, I think it's a good Wildcard.
37:28It's a fun, I enjoy the Cowboys,
37:31and I enjoy the Live stuff,
37:34and I enjoy the Star Trek.
37:36So it gets everything for me.
37:38And that wasn't enough to keep a streaming service alive.
37:41Cowboys and Star Trek?
37:42You would think it would have been in 1966.
37:46And unfortunately, me and the Boomers
37:49are the only ones that still watch it.
37:51But, you know, it'll get merged with Peacock or something.
37:53So I'll have it all together again.
37:55There is a really good article
37:56about the demise of Paramount Plus
37:59that just talks about the sheer hubris
38:01which with this product was launched.
38:03It's beautiful.
38:04Where they're like, well, we don't have a lot of stuff,
38:05but we've got CBS, we've got Star Trek,
38:07and we have Taylor Sheridan.
38:09And everyone's like, that's not enough stuff.
38:11They're like, do you know how much stuff Netflix has?
38:12They're like, no, no, no, CBS.
38:15It turned out that the girls-
38:15I mean, it worked for them for like, what?
38:1730 years as a broadcast network?
38:19CBS was the most watched broadcast network.
38:21So they're like, yeah.
38:22When you're one of only three things that exists to watch.
38:25Yeah.
38:26Yeah, when they had like a monopoly,
38:27kind of like a pseudo monopoly, they crushed it.
38:30Yeah.
38:31And more competition came and they,
38:33they're an 89 on 89.
38:34Yeah, it gets tougher when you're 89 channel two.
38:37One thing, single-handedly keeping CBS alive,
38:39this is a true story.
38:41Alex is addicted to 60 Minutes.
38:42Yes.
38:43She walks into our newsroom at least twice a week
38:45and is like, I saw this thing on 60 Minutes.
38:47And all of us have to be like, well,
38:49definitionally, Alex,
38:50that means it happened eight months ago.
38:51It's true, I love it.
38:54It's my favorite show.
38:55It just gives you a really good insight
38:57into what CBS wants boomers to think about.
38:59Yeah.
39:00And I love that.
39:01I want to know that too.
39:02Yeah.
39:03It's a good time.
39:04All right.
39:05Leslie Stahl, I mean, oh my God.
39:07I could talk about her for hours,
39:08but we don't have that much time to go, so.
39:11We don't.
39:12Yeah.
39:13When I think about South by Southwest,
39:14I think about Leslie Stahl.
39:15Yeah, Leslie Stahl fangirling specifically.
39:17We really, yeah, exactly.
39:19David.
39:19You're up next.
39:20Oh, it's me.
39:22Crap.
39:23All right, well, I've got, I've got two left, right?
39:24Yes.
39:254k and niche.
39:27Niche.
39:28Well, this next one can go into either one.
39:30Okay.
39:31I'm picking my new favorite streaming service.
39:33Bravia Core.
39:33Oh God.
39:35The streaming service only available on select Sony televisions.
39:37I just instantly lost the draft.
39:39Congratulations.
39:40It has four movies on it, and they all look amazing.
39:43They're all Spider-Man.
39:44It streams at 80 megabits per second.
39:45It's out of control.
39:45Sony owns no movies.
39:46It owns no IP.
39:47It's just like old Spider-Man movies.
39:49You have to set the TV to allow it to stream
39:53at like this level of bandwidth.
39:54Do you have to like call your cable company?
39:56You're like, listen, it's about to get weird, two hours.
39:59This is a true fact.
40:01Sony is like such a big disconnected company.
40:02They make the TVs.
40:04Only the TVs support the streaming service.
40:06They did not put an ethernet port on the TVs
40:09that is fast enough to support the streaming service.
40:12So you either have to use wifi
40:14or you have to buy a USB to ethernet adapter.
40:16Like a US, this is a true.
40:18So I did it.
40:19It's great.
40:20I love it.
40:21I've never had more fun in my life not watching movies
40:22and instead configuring the settings of my TV.
40:25It's very good.
40:26So where is it on the Go90?
40:27It's like a zero, right?
40:29Oh, it's, Sony loves this thing.
40:30Yeah.
40:31They're never getting rid of it.
40:32Yeah.
40:33If you've ever wanted to watch a Ghostbusters 2
40:34in the most pristine quality of your entire life.
40:37Like you can see every form.
40:38Which I did.
40:38I did it so, I watched the shit out of Ghostbusters 2.
40:42And I showed it to other people
40:43and they were like, why are we watching Ghostbusters 2?
40:46Like 4K IMAX right now.
40:48You don't have to pick this.
40:49You know that, right?
40:50Yeah.
40:51No one from Sony is like back there.
40:54You have choices.
40:54Pointing anything at you.
40:55There's a lot.
40:56In the free, the glorious state of Texas,
40:59I'm exercising my free market rights as an American
41:02to pick BraviaCore.
41:05The best streaming service that is the weirdest to use,
41:07that has a credit system that makes no sense.
41:10Sometimes it just forgets that it gave you.
41:12It's all very bad, but it's all glorious.
41:15Like I want every one of these services
41:17to offer me like, stream a Blu-ray to me.
41:20And that's what David's just looking at me.
41:22He's like, you should stop talking.
41:24Horrified.
41:25It's good.
41:26I just always thought it was a bit
41:27when you would come in and be like,
41:28I watched a movie on BraviaCore.
41:30And now I'm like, oh no, Nealey loves BraviaCore.
41:33I do.
41:34Do you have like a little monitor to show it
41:36so that it always shows you what the bit rate is?
41:38Do you think I don't have the Eero app on my phone open
41:40showing me how fast the internet speed is going on the TV
41:43while I watch something like Zero Dark Thirty again?
41:46You actually don't watch Zero Dark Thirty.
41:47It's just up there while you watch your Eero app.
41:50It's very good.
41:51And then, I've told this story before.
41:53If you watch Zero Dark Thirty
41:54and then you have a small child
41:55who is not compliant about eating,
41:56you start accidentally like saying torture words
41:59to your small child.
42:01Because like Zero Dark Thirty is like very intense.
42:03And then the next day I was like,
42:04your behavior determines how you're treated.
42:06She's like, I'm not eating the apples.
42:08Don't do that.
42:08She's like, don't do that to your child.
42:10It was bad.
42:15I didn't feel great about it.
42:18I'm proud of you.
42:19It's okay.
42:19You've made it through, that's all.
42:21All right, now it's me.
42:24You've got one left?
42:24I have two left, but I get to do them both right now.
42:26Oh wow, spirit.
42:28Which feels like a lot of pressure.
42:29So I'm gonna pick 2B for 4K
42:31because I just now the second confirmed
42:33that there is at least one 4K thing on 2B
42:35and it's a fireplace video.
42:37Like it's like a Yule log situation.
42:40But it counts.
42:41It's 4K and it's on 2B so I get to have it.
42:44So that's going in 4K.
42:45Okay.
42:46Pretty psyched about it.
42:48That works.
42:49I should have picked 2B for a different one.
42:50I did this draft poorly.
42:51Yeah.
42:52As it has turned out.
42:53Here at the end we're just picking stuff.
42:53But we're coming around.
42:54It's gonna be fine.
42:56I just realized all of my wild cards were gone
42:59two rounds ago so it's been like
43:00kind of messing with me for a while.
43:02But it's okay.
43:03So I'm picking 2B.
43:03Okay.
43:04Which I actually think is like
43:0830 somewhere in that range on the scale.
43:11It's like doing really well.
43:13It's like sneakily very popular.
43:15Also Fox has no other streaming anything to do
43:18so they just give everything to 2B.
43:20But also 2B's whole thing was it's free
43:23and there's ads and that's where everybody else is going.
43:26Yep.
43:27So that could be bad.
43:29Yeah.
43:29And so now they're like,
43:30what if we had.
43:32Now they're like,
43:32well we have to get some good content.
43:34How do we do that?
43:35It's like oh no.
43:37Welcome to everyone else's hell from the last tour.
43:39Well they just go to like Zaslav
43:40and they're like hey,
43:41is there any show you wanna cancel?
43:43And can we just like.
43:44Can we just like have it?
43:45Yeah.
43:46He's like no, tax cuts.
43:47Absolutely not.
43:48I gotta put it in the vault.
43:50Can't have it.
43:52Yeah.
43:52That was my Zaslav.
43:53That was good.
43:54I'm sorry.
43:55That was perfect.
43:56You know it was great because I actually don't know
43:57what David Zaslav sounds like.
43:57That exactly.
43:58It's like that.
43:59She nailed it.
44:00Yeah.
44:01Put it in the vault.
44:02Yeah.
44:03Yeah.
44:04What's the other one?
44:05I think for my wild card,
44:08I'm struggling with this.
44:10I think I'm taking Instagram reels.
44:13Which feels insane as I say it out loud.
44:15I just wanna,
44:16you can't.
44:18You know he can't.
44:19If you choose TikTok,
44:20he can absolutely choose the TikTok clone.
44:21TikTok doesn't have pictures.
44:23Instagram famously.
44:25Hey, TikTok has slideshows now.
44:27The slideshows are effectively a form of video.
44:32Videos are just pictures all in a row.
44:34When does the slideshow become a video?
44:39Let's talk about this.
44:41Like what is a video?
44:41If I go through my PowerPoint really fast,
44:43is that a video?
44:44You were swiping a TikTok carousel at 24 frames per second?
44:47It's called persistence of vision, Pierce.
44:50Aren't you a tech journalist?
44:52No, I'm giving it to me.
44:53I'm taping it in here.
44:55By the way, taking Tubi in Instagram reels back to back
44:58is just the saddest, man.
45:00Feels great.
45:01Those are the last two cars in the rental lot.
45:03Do you know how much content I have now?
45:07All the good stuff.
45:08Do you know how much repurposed garbage
45:10from other people's platforms?
45:11He's getting TikTok.
45:13I literally just got TikTok.
45:14Like five rounds after you.
45:17Which is perfect.
45:18You're gonna see everything
45:19and then two weeks later, I'm gonna see it.
45:21That's great.
45:21I'm super happy for you.
45:23With the same UI too.
45:24Yeah, I'm psyched about it.
45:26I think this is great.
45:27But I also, I really feel like we started with like
45:29things that have won Oscars
45:31and we're all the way down at things
45:32that unironically call themselves content.
45:34And that's, this is the spectrum that I have created.
45:37I'm very proud of it.
45:38I'm very proud for you.
45:38Thank you.
45:39Good job.
45:40Oh boy.
45:41All right, who's next?
45:42Neely, you're up.
45:43No, isn't it?
45:43Kranz is next?
45:44I don't know how this works.
45:45Nope.
45:46Crap, I wasn't prepared.
45:47Your last one is niche.
45:48This is all you have left.
45:50So David just updated the spreadsheet
45:52with the word Sony BraviaCore
45:53and somehow Google Docs transmitted his disdain.
45:57When it did that.
45:58All right, so the last category I have left is niche.
46:03Which is tough here.
46:07I have to think of a streaming service.
46:12Okay, I know.
46:13I know what I'm gonna do.
46:14I feel weird about it.
46:16I'm gonna say it.
46:17It's only because my father-in-law's at my house
46:19and he has been watching this streaming service nonstop
46:23since he arrived.
46:24Motor Trend TV.
46:27Tell us about Motor Trend TV.
46:28Motor Trend TV is an app
46:30that plays Motor Trend content at you.
46:34If you are interested in older cars
46:36being turned into nicer cars,
46:38do I have an app for you, my friends?
46:41Have you ever thought about watching a show
46:42where some dudes go to a car auction?
46:47That's it?
46:48That's the whole?
46:49Do they bid or do they just go?
46:52Well, they talk about whether they would bid,
46:54is it worth it?
46:55It's very much like PBS, but with cars.
47:00I also find it captivating.
47:02I'm a car nerd.
47:03I just can't.
47:04The duration it's currently being displayed in my home
47:07is really quite something.
47:09And so just for the family, I'm doing this.
47:10And this is like a thing you can turn on
47:12and it just keeps happening at you.
47:14Yeah, it is like a full grid guide of Motor Trend content.
47:17Fair enough.
47:18Yeah.
47:19It is niche.
47:20Yeah, it's the most.
47:21Yeah, that counts.
47:21I would say that is the most.
47:22I'm pretty certain my father-in-law
47:23is keeping this service afloat.
47:25It's just him.
47:26Is this Motor Trend one word or two words?
47:28It's one.
47:30It's one word.
47:30One word, but two words.
47:32Like TV is a different word?
47:33You know what I'm saying?
47:34Motor Trend TV.
47:35Yeah.
47:36Got it.
47:37Yeah.
47:37Okay, that's not what I thought you were going to say.
47:39All right.
47:40What did you think I was going to say?
47:40Something other than that.
47:41I don't know.
47:43So many choices.
47:44I was really excited to find out.
47:46Yeah, I was really thinking about like,
47:47what's at the bottom of my Apple TV grid?
47:50And then.
47:51Oh, that's interesting.
47:52It's a wasteland of gone 90s.
47:55Mine is like BBC America.
47:57Yeah.
47:57And like a PBS app that won't let me log in anymore
48:00because I canceled my account when I moved.
48:03And they were like, no, you hate PBS in America.
48:05You can't get in anymore.
48:06Yeah.
48:07They get really mad when you move.
48:08Very upset.
48:09PBS is just so.
48:10NPR is mad at me now.
48:11It's a whole thing.
48:12All right, Alex, you're up last.
48:14All right.
48:15Awards.
48:15Last, awards.
48:16I'm going to go Mubi.
48:17Mubi.
48:18That's how you say it.
48:19Which has won an Oscar.
48:20Yeah.
48:21Can you say the name of the thing again?
48:23Mubi.
48:25M-U-B-I.
48:26M-U-B-I, okay.
48:27It's real.
48:28It's real.
48:28And that's not Tubi.
48:30No.
48:31It's Mubi.
48:32Got it.
48:33Okay.
48:34It's real.
48:35I swear it's real.
48:36I saw it when I was walking in,
48:37they had some signs outside and I went like.
48:39You like wrote it down like,
48:41in case they need to think of a fifth streaming service.
48:43I forgot about Mubi.
48:44And then you checked to make sure they'd won an Oscar.
48:46Yeah.
48:47Because Mubi is all independent films
48:51in the last few decades.
48:52That's a good one.
48:53What Oscar did it win?
48:54A lot.
48:55No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no.
48:57This is not a movie that won an Oscar
48:59is available on this service.
49:01Yeah.
49:02That's nothing.
49:02This is a movie original.
49:05He chose Disney Plus as his award.
49:08Because they pay for the movies.
49:09He won an Oscar.
49:11What did he win?
49:12Disney wins the Oscars.
49:12He won a documentary Oscar thanks to Questlove,
49:15Alex Kranz.
49:17And then I made a whole Disney Plus original joke.
49:19Where have you been, Alex?
49:20Wait, wait.
49:21Where have you been?
49:22You're saying that I can't just choose like.
49:23No, that's all of them.
49:25So I couldn't have.
49:26It has a movie available that has won an Oscar
49:29is TikTok in one minute increments.
49:31Exactly.
49:32That's all of them.
49:33Exactly.
49:34I was always all ready for it.
49:35So you were just going to pick.
49:37Like it has a movie available that has won an Oscar
49:39is Reddit.
49:40A hundred percent.
49:41All right.
49:43This was the hardest category because of this rule.
49:46This exact rule.
49:47Because if not for the rule,
49:48it would be the easiest category.
49:49Right.
49:50Because it's all of them.
49:52Twitter has movies on it that have won Oscars.
49:55I know.
49:55By the way, he says it's a video first platform.
49:58Does Twitter count?
49:58You could pick Twitter.
50:01If you can, if Tucker Carlson has won an Oscar
50:04while on X, he can have it.
50:06Yeah, sure.
50:07So it has to have been a streaming service
50:09very specifically.
50:10Yes.
50:11The company that hosts it has to have made it
50:15and it has to have won an Oscar.
50:16Then I'll choose Hulu.
50:18She can do that because she's not in the bundle.
50:20That is true.
50:20Okay.
50:21Bam.
50:23But movie's better.
50:24No.
50:25You heard about movie just now.
50:27I know and it looks really sick.
50:28I'm going to go subscribe.
50:30It's got 4K.
50:31There you go.
50:32It's got a lot of old movies.
50:34Many of which have won Oscars.
50:35Yeah.
50:36It's got award winning content on it.
50:38Yeah.
50:39Sure.
50:40So Hulu produces and theatrically distributes films
50:43by emerging and established filmmakers
50:44unlike everything else that does that exact same thing.
50:46I feel like the best case scenario for buying display
50:49advertising in South by Southwest
50:51is people on a stage Googling what your company is
50:53in front of an audience.
50:54I legitimately was like 40% sure.
50:56Zero people have signed up
50:57but we have definitely Googled it now.
50:59Alex Kranz, where is Mubi on the Go90 scale?
51:02This is the worst case scenario.
51:05Wait, no, it's Hulu now, right?
51:07Well, I'd like you to do both.
51:08Okay.
51:09You want me to do both?
51:10Okay, Mubi is, it feels like it's going to be pretty low
51:14on the Go90 scale.
51:15It feels like a 20.
51:17Because a lot of people,
51:18like it was just like.
51:19You put a Mubi.
51:20It's the year 2028, Netflix is gone.
51:24But Mubi, Mubi versus this.
51:27Because like, nobody knows about Mubi
51:28and Mubi's just like.
51:29Yeah, they can't kill it if you can't find it.
51:31Yeah, it's just like, it's just thriving
51:34over there in a corner.
51:35And periodically you're like, you know what?
51:37I'll turn on Mubi.
51:38And Netflix though, everybody's going to like flip on it.
51:41Yeah, Netflix is like a public company.
51:42Like Reed's got to get out there
51:43and explain his content.
51:44Mubi is just like, I don't know.
51:45We just licensed Oscar winning independent film.
51:47Yeah, they could do whatever they want.
51:48All right, I buy it.
51:50Hulu, on the other hand.
51:53I chose a lot of 89s on this one, huh?
51:55Because that's definitely like an 89.
51:57Like it doesn't have a lot of time left in this world.
52:01Hulu might be the most 89.
52:03More than Paramount Plus.
52:04No, yeah, no way.
52:06Hulu is already actively dying.
52:08The person who owns Hulu has said he's getting Hulu.
52:11Like trying to rank different 89s
52:14is actually why you have other numbers.
52:16I didn't give anything an 89.
52:18What is the most 89?
52:20It's like a question that has long been solved
52:22by the existence of other numbers.
52:23Paramount Plus is now an 87.
52:25Okay, okay.
52:26And then we'll put Hulu at 89.
52:28Okay, there.
52:28And then TikTok is at 89.
52:30TikTok is 89, like that's straight up.
52:3288.
52:33You think it's 88?
52:34Which do you think is more likely
52:35to not be here at the end of the year?
52:37Paramount Plus?
52:38Or TikTok?
52:39TikTok might not be here at the end of the week.
52:41That's fair.
52:43I mean, it probably will.
52:44The teens are strong.
52:45The teens are strong.
52:46People love their TikTok.
52:48And they will VPN into China immediately.
52:50The teens are like,
52:51get me on the other side of that firewall.
52:52Yeah, a lot of people are learning about VPNs.
52:55So I think it'll persist.
52:58I'm putting it at 88.
52:59All right.
53:01Again, what is the most 89 is a baffling question.
53:04I think TikTok is,
53:05right now, at this moment,
53:06who knows what's gonna happen?
53:07Yeah.
53:08I think TikTok is at 89.
53:08I think Paramount Plus is an 88.
53:09I think Hulu is an 87.
53:11Okay.
53:12Hulu is famously unkillable.
53:14Like many, many, many people have tried to kill Hulu
53:17and they can't do it.
53:18I would love if Bob was just like,
53:19couldn't do it.
53:20Just let it persist.
53:21That's his next press conference.
53:22Somehow someone still owns part of it.
53:24I've been trying to kill this thing.
53:25He's like, Hulu keeps going.
53:26We're gonna enjoy it.
53:27But I think they want to merge it into Disney.
53:30I think they want that to be the brand,
53:31like all this stuff.
53:32Yeah.
53:33It's gone.
53:34It's my feeling.
53:36Yeah.
53:36Hulu is not going to be around for very long.
53:38We're gonna be so wrong.
53:39Like, it's gonna be Hulu and movie.
53:41I'm so excited to do this next year
53:42and Netflix has just gone out of business
53:44and Alex is like,
53:45yeah, I told you.
53:46I'm gonna be so vindicated.
53:48Paramount Plus is still around,
53:49Hulu is still around and Netflix is gone.
53:51Please watch my show on Netflix, people.
53:53You can watch it in one minute sections on Instagram Reels.
54:00Please watch the future of in one minute increments
54:02on Instagram Reels.
54:03That's gonna go great for us.
54:04It's perfect.
54:05All right, that is the end of the draft.
54:06Would you like to read it?
54:07It's the end of the draft?
54:08Yes, please.
54:09You've done it.
54:10Okay, Alex Cranston first.
54:11Yes.
54:12And you picked Peacock, movie slash Hulu.
54:16I'm actually gonna give you both.
54:17I just feel like you should have both.
54:18Thank you.
54:19I appreciate it.
54:20Netflix, channels, Crunchyroll and Paramount Plus.
54:24I'm gonna have a great time watching all of my content.
54:26I think there's a...
54:27There was just a dismissive hiss laugh from over there.
54:29I just wanna be very clear.
54:31I think there's a chance only two of yours still exist
54:34by the time we do this next.
54:35Neil, I picked TikTok, the Disney bundle.
54:38Nailed it.
54:39Sony Bravia core, which is a real, real tank.
54:42YouTube TV with Sunny Ticket, Motor Trend TV and Max.
54:46I just wanna point out this is like...
54:47You were all over the place today.
54:49This is breadth, this is depth, this is Oscar winning.
54:52Motor Trend TV.
54:54At this point, if they don't win an Oscar,
54:55what are you doing?
54:57Everyone else has, movie.
54:59Yeah, I would say the range here is unparalleled.
55:02The quality is unparalleled.
55:03The 4K is available if you can get off your AT&T plan.
55:08There's no fight in it.
55:09Is Motor Trend TV in 4K?
55:12No, no.
55:13It's not.
55:14It's 360p.
55:17That is being shot on a GoPro from 1994.
55:20That's the situation.
55:21I love it.
55:22David, what did you pick?
55:23I picked YouTube with ads.
55:26All the ads.
55:27Apple TV, Tubi, Prime Video,
55:30Criterion Collection and Instagram Reels.
55:33Which I'm still having a lot of feelings.
55:34I think you won, actually.
55:36Thinking about it, I'm like, no.
55:38I'm sorry, you picked YouTube with ads and Instagram Reels?
55:40You picked BraviaCore and Motor Trend TV?
55:43Yeah, yeah.
55:4480 megabits per second.
55:45We can't all have winners, man.
55:47Why do you even have a gigabit interconnection?
55:50What was the new movie that just came to BraviaCore
55:51that you were all excited about?
55:52Anyone but you.
55:53A movie which does not contain any sequences
55:55of action fast enough to require 80 megabits per second.
55:58That movie can be compressed into a series of still frames.
56:01Glenn Howell taking his shirt off looking great.
56:03Here's Glenn Powell next to another jacked guy.
56:06Just one frame at a time.
56:08It's just a series of pictures going by very quickly.
56:11With that, you could watch in one minute increments
56:12on TikTok and probably get the vibe.
56:14And I'm confident that that will be.
56:16TikTok's entire content strategy
56:17is just copyright infringement
56:19and also Chinese propaganda.
56:22And you can just see.
56:23I maintain a list of TikToks
56:24that I think should be media studies PhDs.
56:26Happy to share.
56:28And all of them are just layers upon layers
56:30of copyright infringement.
56:32Yeah, that's good stuff.
56:33All right, that's it.
56:34David's like, that's it.
56:34That's the draft.
56:35We're gonna win.
56:36Who won?
56:37David won.
56:38You can't just declare yourself a winner.
56:41I declared him a winner too.
56:42Two out of three.
56:43We have an audience.
56:44Yeah, no, you're right.
56:45Okay, who thinks Neil I won the draft?
56:47Yeah, that's correct.
56:48This is brutal.
56:48One person did raise their hand.
56:50That guy runs Bravia Corp.
56:51That was really nice of you.
56:52Yeah.
56:53That's Steve Sony right there.
56:54Who thinks Alex won the draft?
56:55Alex Krantz.
56:56Yeah, look at that.
56:58Crunchyroll fans out there.
57:00And who thinks I won the draft?
57:05With YouTube with ads?
57:08Yeah.
57:09Yes.
57:10You go to the bathroom doing the ads.
57:12We gotta end this.
57:13That's it.
57:13That's the VertiShast everybody.
57:15Thank you all for coming here at South by Southwest.
57:17To all the people in the cars that are here.
57:19Thank you for listening to our show.
57:21Send us your own draft orders.
57:23We'd love to hear from you.
57:25David and I have received a number of emails
57:27from people showing us photos of decorative plates
57:29in their homes.
57:30Yes.
57:30After an offhand mention of a decorative plate.
57:32That's very confusing,
57:33but continue to send us your parents' silverware.
57:36Yes, please.
57:37That's very good.
57:38And we'll be back next week.
57:40Every week for the rest of our lives,
57:41we'll be talking about these issues.
57:42Yes.
57:43VertiShast, rock and roll.
57:50And that's it for The Vergecast this week.
57:52Hey, we'd love to hear from you.
57:53Give us a call at 866-VERGE-11.
57:56The Vergecast is a production of The Verge
57:57and Vox Media Podcast Network.
57:59Our show is produced by Andrew Marino and Liam James.
58:02That's it.
58:03We'll see you next week.