Rumpole of the Bailey. S06 E02. Rumpole and the Summer of Discontent.

  • 3 months ago
First broadcast 4th November 1991.

Rumpole defends a union activist accused of manslaughter while Hilda goes on strike as Rumpole's cook because of his late hours.

Leo McKern ... Horace Rumpole
Marion Mathie ... Hilda Rumpole
Peter Bowles ... Guthrie Featherstone
Peter Blythe ... Samuel Ballard Q.C.
Julian Curry ... Claude Erskine-Brown
Abigail McKern ... Liz Probert
Jonathan Coy ... Henry
Denis Lill ... Mr. Bernard
Richard Murdoch ... Uncle Tom
Christopher Milburn ... Dave Inchcape
Denys Graham ... Hoskins
Preston Lockwood ... Lord Chancellor
Joanna Van Gyseghem ... Lady Marigold Featherstone
Ronnie Stevens ... Mr. Justice Parsloe
Peter Carlisle ... Wilfred Shadwell
Gordon Gostelow ... Magistrate
Bryan Pringle ... Ben Baker
Ron Pember ... Dennis 'Den' Timson
Robert Austin ... Ernie Elver
Del Henney ... Gerald Jebb
Stephen Gordon ... D.I. Walcroft
Louis Haslar ... Usher
John Mortimer ... Theatregoer in bar at the opera during the interval
David Squire ... Peanuts Molloy

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Transcript
00:00This episode is called Rumpole and the Summer of Discontent. It concerns itself with such
00:12matters as strikes and organised labour. The case is about a brick being thrown at a coach
00:20as it passes a picket line, but more people are going on strike than that. Hilda has gone
00:26on strike and no longer wishes to cook for Rumpole, so you'll see what happens when Rumpole
00:32cooks. It's a fairly disastrous ending to that particular part of the story. Guthrie
00:38Featherstone wants to go on strike because solicitors, who are sort of the other class
00:44of lawyers, want to do more barristering. The judges are very discontented and thinking
00:50of going on strike. There's a lot in it about the trade union, really, aspect of barristering.
01:01As Liz Probert at one moment says, the barristers and the law are one of the most restrictive
01:08practices of all, and isn't that true? You may spot in this episode a young or sort of
01:17just about middle-aged barrister who wrote these stories doing a little Hitchcock act.
01:47I wish to reason with you, brother, as to whether you should cross this picket line
02:13in an officially recognised dispute.
02:43Oh, raise the scarlet standard high. Within its shade we'll live or die.
03:02Oh, cowards flinch and to rate us near, we'll keep the red flag flying here.
03:10Morning's at 11.30 approximately. The temple's dew-pearled, the lark's on the wing, the snail's on the thorn.
03:20God's in his heaven, and all's right with the world. Well, more or less all right, anyway.
03:27They're all waiting for you, Mr. Rampol. Clients, Henry. Do I have a room full of errant
03:32human beings, all of them with a blessed tendency to crime?
03:36Not exactly, sir. The members of Chambers is waiting for you. Mr. Ballard expected you first thing.
03:41Why should I be in first thing? I've got nothing in court today, Henry. I mean to laze around with the
03:46Times crossword. Only dropped in here is a temporary refuge from domestic bliss.
03:53Mr. Ballard expects everyone in by nine, sir. That's what Mr. Ballard says.
03:56What's he think this is, the barrister's chambers or the local cash and carry?
04:00I couldn't say, sir. Anyhow, he's got me waiting for you here at the checkout.
04:06Ballard's in his chambers, and practically everything seems to be wrong with the world.
04:15Oh, no! Not another Chambers meeting. In the new age of efficiency at the bar, Rampol,
04:22it might be more appropriate to call it a board meeting. Quite right. I'm bored to tears already.
04:27I'm afraid yours is a voice making jokes in the wilderness, Rampol. We at Equity Court have decided,
04:32whilst you were away doing your stint of minor crime in the north of England...
04:36It was gross indecency in Leeds. Whatever it was, we've decided to put our full weight behind the
04:41government's plans to drag the English bar into the 20th century.
04:45There was a chap called Wimpering in Chambers in Fountain Cove. Please, Uncle Tom.
04:49He said he could drag the bar into the 20th century. Please.
04:53So he bought an automatic coffee-making machine instead of the old kettle they used in the brews cupboard.
04:59We have decided that to give the consumer a proper service,
05:03three Equity Court will be run on strictly business lines.
05:06You may look upon me as chairman of the board, and Claude Erskine-Brown as managing director.
05:12He will now speak to our new ideas on possible partnership with solicitors.
05:17And how will our new ideas answer him? Rudely, I hope.
05:20The Office Italiano is what this machine was called.
05:23It was supposed to brew up that sort of inky black stuff you used to get in foreign railway stations.
05:29You each have an agenda in front of you.
05:31Now, we're going to start by working proper business hours.
05:34Nine to six, and no more than one hour for luncheon.
05:38And there'll be a simple form for you to fill in every week,
05:41so that we can monitor each member's productivity.
05:44How do we monitor your productivity, Claude?
05:46By the number of years in Chokey you managed to get for your unfortunate client.
05:51Then one day this Office Italiano machine exploded,
05:54and it destroyed a whole lot of original documents, including three wills.
05:59Oh dear, it caused an awful stink.
06:02Poor old Wimpering. He got sued for negligence.
06:05Uncle Tom.
06:06We're aiming for a more streamlined, slimmed-down operation.
06:10Leaner and fitter.
06:11Do you think you could manage a slimmed-down operation, Rumple?
06:15I'll be comical, Claude. Try to remember I make the jokes in chambers meetings.
06:19I hope in the future we can get through our business in an atmosphere of quiet efficiency,
06:23without too many jokes.
06:25No jokes at all, Bollard, if you have anything to do with it.
06:28He had to leave the bar, took up turkey farming in Norfolk.
06:31Who took up turkey farming in Norfolk?
06:33This chap Wimpering, the fellow who introduced the coffee-making machine.
06:38Ah, yes, in the end they went back to the old kettle and gas ring.
06:42Far more satisfactory.
06:44I think I went into the law because I wanted to be a barrister.
06:47I don't want an office job, quite honestly.
06:49Oh, really? Well, times change, Inchcape, and we have to change with them.
06:53Now, to get back to Claude's paper.
06:55I'm not sure we want solicitors joining us. Do we need the competition?
06:59I speak as a man who has four daughters to bring up,
07:02and Jollywell needs every briefing he can get hold of.
07:04Yes, yes. Well, I suppose, Hoskins, it's just possible that some solicitors have daughters too.
07:09If we're making these changes...
07:11We are, Probert, we are. The Lord Chancellor expected of us, very definitely.
07:15No, no, no, no. Carry on, Elizabeth.
07:17We'd like to hear your contribution. Don't be shy.
07:20Then why don't we make it a really radical chambers?
07:23This chap Wimpering...
07:24Uncle Tom was a bit of a radical. War-coloured sock.
07:28I mean, why don't we concentrate on civil liberties?
07:31Stop the government using the courts for another spot of union bashing.
07:36My dad knows a union leader who's been arrested.
07:38Now, that's just the sort of thing we should be...
07:40What? What? Defending trades unions, Miss Probert?
07:44Oh, I don't think that's quite the sort of image we want to give Number Three Equity Court.
07:50I'm afraid I agree.
07:51Standing up to plead for the amalgamated sausage-skin operatives, or whatever they are,
07:56not quite the name of the game at this particular moment in history.
07:59Oh, really, Claude? You're a barrister, aren't you?
08:02You belong to the oldest trade union of the lot, crammed full of restrictive practices.
08:07Oh, got you there, old love. Direct hit, right below the waterline.
08:10Well, really, Elizabeth, isn't that just a little bit hard on a fellow?
08:24Brother Rumpole, Sister Probert, brother from the solicitor's office.
08:30Brothers, sister.
08:31You make it sound like a case in the family division.
08:34You come to me highly recommended, Brother Rumpole,
08:36by Brother Ron Probert, Chair of the South East London Council.
08:39I told you, my dad put in a word for you.
08:41Brother Rumpole, I'm assured that you're taking on this case
08:44as an expression of your solidarity with the workers' struggle
08:47and the right to withdraw labour.
08:49Well, let's say I'm doing it as an expression of my right to do cases
08:52that don't actually bore me to extinction.
08:54Now then, Mr Baker, let me put the case against you.
08:58Manslaughter.
08:59Me? Kill someone? That's a joke, that is.
09:02Oh, manslaughter in jest. No offence to the world.
09:06There is evidence that as the unfortunate coach driver,
09:09now deceased, was being carried to the ambulance,
09:12you were heard intoning some ditty about the people's flag being deepest red.
09:16We singed it at social events. It's just like Auld Lang Syne.
09:19Or somewhere over the rainbow.
09:22I suggest that during this industrial dispute
09:24you behave with utter contempt for the law.
09:27Me? Never.
09:28You're on a picket line with more than six people.
09:30That's not a law, that's a code of practice.
09:32Oh, please, Mr Baker.
09:33Let's leave these niceties to Miss Liz, Sister Liz.
09:37She has the books.
09:38Neither you nor I have the time to read them.
09:40Do you deny you're on a picket line with more than six people?
09:42Some others turned up to give us extra support, yes.
09:46Brothers from your own place of work?
09:48Not necessarily.
09:49Or brothers you'd never seen in your life before?
09:51Well, some of them was, yes, but we needed all the help we could get.
09:54Even illegal help?
09:55I suppose so.
09:57Even the help of a brick chuck through a shabang window?
09:59Oh, it didn't do that, I swear it.
10:01Ah, well.
10:03A witness named Jib says he saw you do it.
10:06He's a bloody liar.
10:08Oh, not a brother then, eh?
10:09Perhaps a more distant relation.
10:14Down at the local nick,
10:15you were subjected to a forensic examination.
10:17They took a liberty.
10:18And traces of brick dust were found on your trousers,
10:20your shirt and your hands.
10:22I was doing some building in the back garden.
10:23A man's got to do something when he's out of work.
10:27Oh, so you indulged in a spot of bricklaying.
10:30How extremely convenient.
10:33So, you think he's guilty?
10:36On the contrary, Sister Liz.
10:38I know he's innocent.
10:41No criminal is going to stand around
10:43singing the red flag over his victim's body.
10:46Certainly not in the presence of the old Bill.
10:49Wouldn't mind the Timpsons doing anything like that, would you?
10:52Well, if he's innocent, we might get him off at the committal.
10:55The only chance of getting him off is in front of a jury.
10:58We say as little as possible at the committal.
11:00All the same, I'd like you there, Mr. Rumpole.
11:02Oh, would you, brother?
11:03Anything to oblige?
11:05Well, you see, I might need a few tips.
11:08Tips, Brother Bernard?
11:10Yes, well, I thought I'd do the advocacy
11:13at the preliminary hearing.
11:15Well, sort of a dummy run for the Lord Chancellor's changes
11:17when we solicitors can appear in the highest courts in the land.
11:21So, if you'll sit behind me, Mr. Rumpole.
11:28Could just get to the bar, thank you so very much.
11:32Oh, what can't ail thee, learned staff?
11:35Alone and palely loitering.
11:37Industrial action.
11:39What? Come again?
11:40I am seriously considering taking industrial action, Mr. Rumpole.
11:43If you take my advice, Henry, you'll take a large drink instead.
11:46Jack, a king-sized Chateau Thames infatement, please,
11:49and a positively mammoth Dubonnet and bitter lemon for my learned clerk.
11:53Oh, put on my slate, why don't you?
11:55You're a generous man, Mr. Rumpole.
11:57Think nothing of it.
11:58If only there were other gentlemen in chambers as generous as you, Mr. Arne.
12:01Meaning?
12:02Meaning Mr. Erskine Brown.
12:04Oh, to name but a few.
12:06There, Mr. Rumpole, you've put your finger on it, sir.
12:09As is your way, sir, as is your invariable way.
12:11Claude Erskine Brown was standing behind the door
12:13when they handed out generosity.
12:15Oh, thank you, Jack.
12:16It's not that, sir.
12:17It's his business plan to slim down chambers, Mr. Rumpole.
12:20Never trust anybody who wants to slim down anything, Henry.
12:24God rot, all slimmers.
12:26He's suggesting taking me off my percentage and putting me on wages, sir.
12:29He says a clerk is just a constant figure on their new balance sheets.
12:32What, should I withdraw my labour?
12:34Oh, industrial action by barrister's clerk
12:37sounds a bit like a strike by poets or pavement artists.
12:41Hardly likely to bring the country to its knees, old love.
12:44Too true, Mr. Rumpole.
12:46Too very true, sir.
12:48So I'd be grateful of your opinion.
12:52My opinion, Henry, is this.
12:54We are the last of the freelancers, the knights errant of the law.
12:59We ride the world with our sword rusty and our armour squeaking.
13:03We do battle with fire-breathing dragons on the bench
13:07and rescue a few none-too-innocent damsels in distress.
13:13We fit into no one's business plan or keep office hours
13:17or meet productivity targets.
13:19And the only choice we offer the client is freedom or chokie.
13:23It could well be, Henry, that our day is done.
13:26Done, Mr. Rumpole?
13:28From too much love of living, from hope and fear set free.
13:32We thank with brief thanksgiving whatever gods may be
13:36that no man lives forever,
13:38that dead men rise up never,
13:40that even the weariest river winds somewhere safe to see.
13:44There, now, Henry, doesn't that cheer you up?
13:47Not very much, sir, if I have to be extremely honest.
13:50Say him again, Jack, please, if there's any room left on the slate.
13:55Hilda!
14:00Hilda!
14:03H...
14:09Hilda?
14:12Answer came there none.
14:14But that was scarcely odd, because she'd went and been and gone.
14:33Ah.
14:35It was hanging on the floor.
14:37What on earth are you doing, Rumpole?
14:39Oh, I was just looking for the note.
14:41What note?
14:42The note which says your stew is in the oven.
14:44There isn't one.
14:45No note.
14:46And no stew in the oven.
14:48Oh, well, er, chops, actually. I'd rather prefer chops.
14:52There aren't any chops, either.
14:55Oh, well, anything, really.
14:58I'm not fussy. Couldn't you whip something up?
15:01No, Rumpole, I'm not whipping anything up.
15:04I waited for you until nearly half-past nine.
15:07Then I went out for a bridge lesson with Marigold Tempston.
15:10Ah, yes, I'm sorry. There was a problem in Chambers.
15:13I had to casimirate, but...
15:15I had... I had to commiserate with Henry.
15:18Yes, I suspect you did.
15:20And no doubt that meant carousing with him, too.
15:23Oh, well, I had to carouse a bit,
15:25to sympathise with him.
15:27Daddy would have drawn the line, that carousing with his father.
15:31Ah, yes, well, your daddy wasn't really one to carouse with anybody, was he?
15:35Let us hope that you drew the line this time at singing.
15:38Oh, no, no, no. No, certainly we did not sing.
15:41No, things had gone well beyond singing.
15:43No, I did recite a bit of poetry.
15:45Oh, look, Hilda, couldn't you turn your hand to a bit of cookery?
15:49No, Rumpole, I'm not a cook.
15:51Hilda, couldn't you turn your hand to a bit of cookery?
15:54No, Rumpole, I'm finished with cooking for you.
15:57When you don't come in until all hours, I'm sorry.
16:00But this is the end of the line.
16:03Hilda, you're not leaving home.
16:05No, Rumpole, I'm not leaving home.
16:07Oh, good, good.
16:09I am taking industrial action, withdrawing my labour.
16:15Oh, Hilda.
16:17Not you, too.
16:22And so far as the brick dust on our client's trousers goes,
16:26we have a complete answer.
16:28Don't tell them what it is.
16:30Where the brick dust comes from, Mr. Bernard,
16:33is surely a matter for the jury.
16:35My sentiments entirely.
16:37But he was building a wall, sir, so there's no evidence.
16:40Mr. Bernard, I have here a statement from Mr. Gerald Jebb
16:45saying that he saw your client hurl the brick.
16:49But, sir, what about the presumption of innocence?
16:52Very well, Mr. Bernard.
16:56What of it?
16:58With the evidence in doubt,
17:00my client is entitled to an acquittal.
17:03That is the golden thread that runs through British justice.
17:07We are all of us innocent
17:09until you can be certain, sure, that we must be guilty,
17:12and I put it to you, sir.
17:14In my humble submission, it is my contention
17:17that you couldn't find my client guilty
17:19on a charge of a non-reviewed dog licence
17:22on the vague and unsatisfactory evidence of this fellow Jebb.
17:27Not now, darling.
17:29We don't do that bit now.
17:32Mr. Bernard, your client will be committed
17:35to trial at the Central Criminal Court
17:38before a jury and a judge.
17:44As you please, sir.
17:47I very much hope he's a judge
17:49with no prejudice against trade unions.
17:52They think they're above the law, these union bosses do.
17:55Over and above it.
17:57I don't know what the country's coming to, Wilfred.
18:00The summer of discontent, that's what I call it.
18:03Brings to mind the French Revolution, my lord.
18:06Does it, Wilfred?
18:08Oh, well, yes, I suppose it does.
18:10I'll tell you one thing.
18:12Old Rumpole is not going to get away with it again.
18:15With the French Revolution, my lord?
18:17Don't be silly.
18:19With manslaughter.
18:21You know, there's a sort of legend going on around the Bailey
18:24that Old Rumpole gets away with it all the time.
18:27Even my wife, even Lady Featherstone
18:30seems to think Old Rumpole can twist me round his little finger.
18:33A very astute lady, if I may say so, my lord.
18:36Be that as it may, Wilfred,
18:38he's not going to get away with this one.
18:40I've been taking a good look at union boss Baker
18:43and I don't like what I see.
18:45I'm going to pot him, good and proper.
18:48In off the red.
18:50Yes, he finally won't be able to go on strike in prison.
18:54Yes?
18:56Guthrie, a moment of your valuable time, if you please.
18:59Now, look here, it's about these dotty schemes of the Lord Chancellor.
19:03No, no, no, do stay, Alfred.
19:05Wilfred, my lord.
19:07Yes, of course, we value your opinion.
19:09Pot him, my lord, all the clerks think so.
19:11In the top court, solicitors sitting on the bench.
19:14Solicitors in the House of Lords before we know where we are, overturning our judgment.
19:18I do so agree. Some of my best friends are solicitors.
19:21Oh, are they indeed?
19:23Not my most intimate friends, of course, but perfectly good acquaintances.
19:26I certainly don't want to have to hear them going on talking all the time.
19:30You and I had enough of that sort of thing when we were at the bar.
19:33Guthrie, I'm so glad you're sound on this.
19:35Oh, yes, I am. I'm perfectly sound.
19:37Now, speaking as the senior judge on the circuit...
19:39Yes, indeed you are, Simon. You are the most senior judge.
19:41A few of us plan to rise early and meet this afternoon.
19:44Mavings from the Court of Appeal and old Ed Burt from Chancery
19:47and I suppose a chap from the Family Division if we have to.
19:50I mean, we've got to take some sort of action.
19:52What? You mean our jobs are at risk?
19:54Well, I mean, who knows? Anything could happen.
19:57Could you make yourself free?
19:59Let them try and stop me.
20:00Sound fellow. Two o'clock then in my room in the law course.
20:02We value your support.
20:04Well, thank you, Simon. Thank you.
20:06Most awfully.
20:10Did you hear that, Wilfred?
20:13Our jobs are at risk.
20:17The summer of discontent.
20:19That's what I call it.
20:21Mr. Jeff, from your position on the picket line,
20:24did you see the defendant Baker stoop down?
20:27My lord, I didn't know that leading questions were allowed
20:30even in cases against trade union officials.
20:32Leading questions are not allowed in any case, Mr. Rumpole,
20:35as you know perfectly well.
20:37Yes, carry on, Mr. Ballard.
20:39I'm obliged to your lordship.
20:41What did you see Baker do?
20:43He stooped down and he picked up a brick, my lord,
20:45and he hurled it at the coach driver.
20:47Did he hurl it hard? Oh, Mr. Ballard.
20:49He hurled it with full force, my lord.
20:51He hurled it with full force at the driver.
20:54Thank you, Mr. Jeff.
20:56Have you any questions for this witness, Mr. Rumpole?
20:59Mr. Jeff, you said that you saw my client stoop to the ground.
21:02Yes, I did.
21:04Had he not just jumped out of the path of a moving shadow bank?
21:07Well, he got out of its way, yes.
21:09And wasn't the driver doing his best to kill him?
21:12I'm not sure what he was doing.
21:14Just as you're not sure what my client was doing
21:17when he stumbled and stooped to the ground.
21:19He's just said that he saw your client pick up a brick and hurl it, Mr. Rumpole.
21:23Oh, I'm sure my learned friend, Mr. Ballard,
21:26will be grateful to your lordship for that intervention.
21:29And just one more thing.
21:31You said nothing to the police at the time
21:33about seeing Mr. Baker hurl that brick.
21:35You made your first statement some three weeks afterwards.
21:38Why was that?
21:40I didn't want to get Basher in trouble.
21:42Oh, you've got him into trouble now, haven't you?
21:44Why did you change your mind?
21:46Because I thought I should tell the truth.
21:48Because I thought I should tell the truth.
21:53Well, have you finished, Mr. Rumpole?
21:55I may have some more questions for this witness, uh, later.
22:00I'm waiting for certain instructions.
22:03I mean, I'm waiting for an inspiration.
22:06Could my learned friend have Mr. Jeb available to be recalled?
22:10He's clearly a vital witness.
22:12I'm sure that with his usual fairness,
22:14Mr. Ballard will undertake to have him available.
22:16You'll undertake to see that he's here, won't you, Mr. Ballard,
22:19just in case Mr. Rumpole can think of any further questions?
22:23Certainly, my lord.
22:27The inspector foresees no difficulty.
22:29Mr. Jeb, before you go,
22:31um, you referred to the defendant as Basher.
22:34The jury might like to know how he acquired that nickname.
22:38My lord, I must object. That is quite irrelevant.
22:40I overrule your objection, Mr. Rumpole.
22:42Because he was always talking about bashing people,
22:45especially them on the boss's side.
22:47Ah, thank you, Mr. Jeb.
22:49That was extremely helpful.
22:51About as helpful as a cup of cold porridge, old darling.
22:54Now, Mr. Ballard, Mr. Rumpole.
22:57My lord.
22:58I'm afraid I shan't be able to sit this afternoon.
23:01Oh, may we ask why, my lord?
23:03No.
23:04No?
23:05Oh, well, I mean, yes, yes, of course.
23:08It's an important matter,
23:10a matter of public duty.
23:13I will rise now.
23:15Be upstanding.
23:20Chop off like a rabbit out of a trap.
23:22Exactly what kind of public duty do you think it is?
23:25Sorry, Rumpole. Lunch will be a bit late.
23:28Isn't she looking delicious today?
23:31Who?
23:32Your learned junior, Rumpole.
23:34It's the contrast, isn't it,
23:36between the impish little face and the strict white wig.
23:40No disrespect to your cross-examination, Rumpole,
23:42but I couldn't take my eyes off her.
23:44How's your wife, Erskine Brown?
23:46Philly.
23:47Doing a rather grand corruption in Hong Kong.
23:50We see so little of each other nowadays.
23:52You want to take Miss Liz Probert to the opera again, don't you?
23:56She'd never come.
24:01She doesn't really like me very much, does she, Rumpole?
24:04I mean, the way she ticked me off at the chamber's meeting.
24:07Look, I don't want you to get the wrong idea about this.
24:10What I have in mind is merely a social event,
24:13and I'm highly innocent.
24:14You do believe that, don't you?
24:16Yes, of course, Claude.
24:17Everyone's innocent until they've proven guilty.
24:20Look, um...
24:22I might just be happy to help you.
24:24Help me, Horace?
24:25Yes, it is true I do have a little influence
24:27with my former pupil, Miss Liz Probert.
24:30Despite my bad luck in not being born a member of an ethnic minority
24:34or female or a one-parent family,
24:37she does sometimes take my advice.
24:39Do you think you could advise her, Horace?
24:41When can I have anything but a purely musical evening?
24:44Purely musical? I promise you.
24:46Scout's honour.
24:47Oh, well, I'll try to do my best
24:50and do a good deed for someone every day.
24:54There'll be bluebirds over
24:57The white cliffs of Dover
25:01Tomorrow
25:05Just you wait and see
25:09There'll be joy and laughter
25:13And something ever after
25:16Tomorrow when the world is free
25:20The ship...
25:23The ship...
25:27The ship...
25:39The ship...
26:00Russell!
26:02Shall I call the fire brigade?
26:04Not necessary. Any longer.
26:06I was just cooking dinner.
26:08I thought you were arranging an interesting collection of fossils.
26:13Oh, look, Hilda, I've had absolutely no training in this line of work.
26:16But you should have thought of that, Rumpel,
26:18before you decided to stay out all hours.
26:20Look, couldn't we refer it to the ACAS conciliation service
26:23or discuss it over beer and sandwiches
26:25like they used to do in the old days?
26:27What's that?
26:29It sounds extraordinarily like the front doorbell.
26:31I'll do.
26:34If you put those potatoes on now, you could have them for pudding.
26:44We never have met, Mrs. Rumpel.
26:46After all, your old man's done for the Timpson family.
26:49A friend of yours, apparently, Rumpel.
26:52Dennis!
26:54Dennis Timpson! How are you?
26:57Senior member of the Timpson clan.
26:59Notorious family of South London villains
27:02that have kept us in saucepanscaras and such like little luxuries
27:06for the last 30 years.
27:08Villains?
27:09Naughty boys. That's what your husband means, dear.
27:11It runs in the family.
27:13God, I'm tickled pink to meet your old ball and chain, Mr. Rumpel.
27:17Well, you know, I was in the vicinity.
27:19Oh, not to get up any naughtiness, Mrs. R.
27:22I wasn't doing over the downstairs or nothing,
27:24but I thought I'd pop up any off chance
27:27having some info that might be of interest to your husband.
27:30Oh, well, sit down, sit.
27:32Why not stay to supper? Hilda hasn't eaten yet.
27:35Thank you, no.
27:37I shall have some cheesy bits at Lady Feverson's bridge lesson.
27:41Goodbye, Mr. Shrimpton.
27:43I don't suppose you'll be here when I get back.
27:47Yeah, I'll see you out.
27:49Thank you, Rumpel. I can find my way out of my old flat.
27:56I'm sorry, Dennis. My...
27:59My wife had a previous engagement.
28:02Yeah, well, I'll call it your place of business, Mr. Rumpel,
28:05but your boy Henry, he said he was out buying groceries.
28:08I said I'd find that hard to believe.
28:10Oh, yes, well, difficult times, Dennis.
28:12They call it the summer of discontent.
28:15Well, now, what is it?
28:17You want to have a bit of trouble, don't you?
28:19No. Oh, no. Well, not at the moment.
28:21Oh, well.
28:23Oh, you're not on strike too, are you?
28:25No. No, of course not.
28:27As a matter of fact, I thought I might help you, Mr. Rumpel.
28:30Oh, really?
28:31Yes, I thought I might tell you about our holiday in Marbella.
28:34Oh, got some snaps to show me, have you?
28:37As a matter of fact, I have brought one along.
28:39Ah.
28:40You see, our enjoyment was just a little bit spoiled
28:43by the arrival of this shower.
28:47Hey, isn't that the Malloy family?
28:49Including young peanuts.
28:51And in view of this case you're working on, as reported in the paper,
28:54you might be interested in the Malloy's vehicle.
28:58Ernie Elwes Luxie Shadows.
29:00Complete with toilets and double glazing.
29:03And young peanuts.
29:05Yes. You'll notice the grey-haired old party
29:08with his arm around Peanuts' Aunt Dolly.
29:10By God, I notice him!
29:12Yeah, Jerry Jeb.
29:13Used to drive getaways for Peanuts' father.
29:15You know what I mean?
29:17Did he indeed?
29:19Oh, you're a treasure, Dennis.
29:21Bless you, old love. Can I keep that?
29:24Look, why not stay for supper?
29:27Er, no, I don't think so, Mr Rumpole.
29:30Look, why don't we attack a chink?
29:32What are you talking about?
29:34What, go for a Chinese?
29:37If you want a radical chambers, Liz,
29:39the only way you'll get it is to persuade Claude Erskine-Brown
29:42to stop trying to be a whiz kid.
29:44Go back to the good old ways.
29:46Equity Court will be a place fit for freelancers again.
29:49We can ride forth and rescue the brothers.
29:51And who's going to persuade Claude?
29:53The person with the most influence on him.
29:55A member of the bar, he'd do anything to impress.
29:58You mean you?
29:59No, you.
30:03Tell him you liked him better when he was an old-fashioned sort of lawyer,
30:07preserving the best traditions of the bar, taking snuff.
30:11Tell him he was sexier like that.
30:15Rumpole, are you suggesting I use my femininity?
30:19It's all in a good cause.
30:21And put up with a bit of Wagner in the interest of justice.
30:31Ah, Wilfred!
30:33Is the judge due to honour us with his presence this morning?
30:37Bless you, yes, Mr. Rumpole.
30:40We're not going on strike yet.
30:43On strike?
30:45We think it may come to it.
30:47That's what our judge was saying.
30:49If the Lord Chancellor wishes to put up a solicitor over our heads,
30:53we may have to take action.
30:55Oh, quite right, too.
30:57So, yesterday afternoon?
30:59Just a taster, Mr. Rumpole.
31:01Just to show the public we're not going to be pushed around.
31:04Of course, there was a meeting.
31:06A union meeting.
31:08A meeting of judges, Mr. Rumpole.
31:10Some of the senior men were there, including ourselves.
31:14Oh, yes, the brothers.
31:16I love that, Wilfred.
31:18Judges and trade unionists call themselves brothers.
31:21It doesn't mean they like each other.
31:23Well, Mr. Rumpole, I must go and get us on the bench.
31:27Yes, must be a bit of a heave for you on some mornings.
31:30And, Mr. Rumpole, you will try not to twist us around your finger, won't you?
31:35Say again?
31:36Because we're determined to pot you this time.
31:39I thought we should warn you.
31:42Oh, how very charming of you, Wilfred.
31:45Charming indeed.
31:57Stop!
31:59I call upon my learned friend, Mr. Bollard.
32:02Bollard!
32:03Makes no difference.
32:04I still call upon him to make the following admission.
32:06That the dark-haired young man on that picket line wearing the red jacket
32:10is Mr. Peter, known as Peanuts Malloy.
32:14I don't suppose your learned friend has any idea.
32:17Then let him ask the detective inspector in charge of the case.
32:20He will very soon find out.
32:27That would seem to be correct, my lord.
32:32Mr. Elver, this dispute at your Cherubin garage
32:35was about your employing non-union untrained drivers?
32:39That's what they said it was.
32:41And my client took the view, rightly or wrongly,
32:44that if you employed these cowboys, there might be an accident.
32:48Someone might get killed.
32:49Now, I suggest that even the most gentle, mild-mannered man
32:52might take industrial action and withdraw his labour in that situation.
32:56Take his lordship.
32:57Mr. Rumpole?
32:59Did you know, Mr. Elver,
33:01that the powers that be have suggested
33:03that solicitors might get jobs as judges?
33:05High court judges? Appeal judges? Lords of appeal?
33:09Mr. Rumpole, these questions are quite irrelevant.
33:12And speaking of appeals,
33:14is your lordship stopping my cross-examination?
33:17No, no, no. Of course I'm not stopping you.
33:19It's just that I fail to see...
33:21If I suggest your lordship sits quietly, all will become clear.
33:24Mr. Rumpole, don't think that you can twist this court around your little finger.
33:28My little finger?
33:30Perish the thought!
33:32Well, now, Mr. Elver, solicitors as judges.
33:35That is the suggestion.
33:37I didn't know.
33:38Well, you know now.
33:40And that suggestion caused even such a reasonable, sensible, moderate man as his lordship
33:46to go on strike.
33:48On strike, Mr. Rumpole? What are you talking about?
33:51Well, yesterday afternoon, my lord,
33:53I seem to remember that not very much work was done.
33:56Was not your lordship on strike?
33:57No, I was not on strike.
33:59Simply withdrawing your labour?
34:01As I told the court, I had to go to an important meeting.
34:04Yes, you did, my lord. You told us that.
34:06Oh, keep out of this, Pollard.
34:08With a very senior judge and other judges from the Chancyon family division.
34:12Ah, yes, the shop stewards. What was the discussion about, my lord?
34:15Mr. Rumpole, are you cross-examining me?
34:19Cross-examining your lordship? Heaven forfend!
34:22Of course, I can understand that if the judges are in dispute with their employers,
34:27then it is a delicate matter. Better kept secret.
34:31No, well, I don't think it is any secret
34:34that certain changes have been proposed in the legal system.
34:38Cowboys on the bench, my lord?
34:40Well, no, perhaps not quite,
34:42but certainly people whose training may not exactly fit them for...
34:45And if these changes are implemented,
34:48are we to expect further industrial action down your belly?
34:52Well, it's a possibility.
34:54I hope that wiser counsel will prevail.
34:57Now, come along, Mr. Rumpole.
34:59It's quite enough of that.
35:01High court judges are not, nor have they ever been,
35:04members of a trades union.
35:06Is that a legal proposition, my lord, or a subject for debate?
35:09Could you get back to the question we have to try?
35:12Did your client commit manslaughter?
35:14I was merely venturing to suggest
35:16that when their jobs are threatened,
35:18even the most reasonable men will withdraw their labour.
35:21I'm sure his lordship will agree.
35:24Do you not think that that is a reasonable proposition, Mr. Elvar?
35:28I suppose so.
35:31But you wanted to make it look as unreasonable as possible, didn't you?
35:35Why would I want to do that?
35:37Well, childishly simple, Mr. Elvar,
35:39because if you could prove there were more than six pickets,
35:42you could get an injunction.
35:44If you could prove that there was violence and intimidation,
35:47you could get the union fine large sums of money,
35:50and you could get rid of that thorn in your flesh, Mr. Basher Baker,
35:53and hire as much cheap cowboy labour as you wanted.
35:56But there was violence on the picket line.
35:58Of course there was, because you put it there.
36:00Usher.
36:06Would you give that to the witness?
36:08You know the Malloy family, don't you?
36:10Not sure.
36:12Oh, come on now, Mr. Elvar.
36:14You employ one of their relations, Jerry Jebb.
36:17They're a pretty hard firm of criminals,
36:19well known to the inspector here.
36:21You hired the Malloy family, didn't you?
36:23To swell the picket line and create as much violence as possible.
36:27And then when you'd arranged the performance,
36:29you videotaped it all from your office window.
36:31Baker was in charge of the picket line.
36:34Of the peaceful pickets, yes.
36:36He did not know the new arrivals.
36:38He took those for sympathetic workers from other firms.
36:41But in fact, they were your gang of hired troublemakers, weren't they?
36:46Mr. Rumperl, are you suggesting that this witness planned the death of the driver?
36:50Oh, no, no, my lord, no.
36:52I'm sure Mr. Elvar was as surprised as anyone
36:55when whoever threw that brick went too far.
36:58Oh, possibly young Peanuts Malloy.
37:00But it was a blessed opportunity
37:02to get the awkward Mr. Baker into real trouble.
37:06How much did it cost you to get Jebb to give that perjured evidence?
37:09My lord, I object. There is no basis.
37:11Or did you get it in a packaged deal for a free holiday in Marbella?
37:16Look at that photograph.
37:18Isn't that one of your luxury charrers in Spain?
37:22It seems to be.
37:23Yes. Do you see Jerry Jebb there?
37:26And young Peanuts and the rest of the Malloy clan?
37:29Yes.
37:30Was that a free holiday, a present from your firm?
37:34I don't think so.
37:35Well, do you have evidence that the Malloys paid for the coach?
37:39Maybe not.
37:40Why not?
37:42Well, Jerry Jebb had been with the firm a long time.
37:45I wanted to do him a favor.
37:47And he did you one in return.
37:49Mr. Rumpole, none of this has been put to the witness Jebb.
37:52Your lordship is perfectly right.
37:54That is why I have asked for the witness Jebb to be recalled.
37:58Very well.
38:00Oh, I see it's a little early, but I will rise now.
38:05A public duty, my lord?
38:07Yes, Mr. Rumpole.
38:09Public duty.
38:11You may put your questions to Mr. Jebb in the morning.
38:14I am much obliged, Your Lordship.
38:16Court will rise.
38:20We'll keep the red flag flying here.
38:24Did you say something, Mr. Rumpole?
38:27I said what an interesting case we're trying here, my lord.
38:47Working hard, Guthrie?
38:49Marigold?
38:51Or are you taking industrial action?
38:53There you are.
38:55Oh, well, a hard day in court, you know,
38:57and I happened to rise a little early.
38:59What was that about industrial action?
39:01I've been reading the paper.
39:03Oh, yes, of course.
39:05A bit about my case in it, is there?
39:07Yes, a very interesting discussion about trade union law.
39:09Can I tell you this, Marigold?
39:11Yes.
39:14Can I tell you this, Marigold?
39:16I'm going to pot that shop, Stuart.
39:19Old Rumpole isn't going to twist me around his little finger this time.
39:22It seems he's already twisted you.
39:24What? No, let me see.
39:26Aren't you fit to be let off the lead, Guthrie?
39:29Ought I to be up there beside you on the bench all the time
39:32telling you when to keep your mouth shut?
39:34Why? What am I supposed to have done?
39:36Well, let me see.
39:38Well, come on, what am I supposed to have said?
39:40Well, something like it, I suppose.
39:42Yes, something very like it.
39:44The judge agreed with Mr Horace Rumpole, counsel for Baker,
39:48that he had been withdrawing his labour yesterday afternoon
39:52when he closed down his court
39:54to attend a protest meeting of senior judges
39:57whom he called shop stewards.
39:59Well, that doesn't make any sense, does it?
40:01Well, it doesn't make any sense, does it?
40:03Well, it doesn't make any sense, does it?
40:05Well, it doesn't make any sense, does it?
40:07...whom he called shop stewards.
40:09Well, that's a libel! It was Rumpole who called them that.
40:12Sounds a pretty accurate description, if you ask me.
40:14There's a leading article on page five.
40:16A leading article?
40:18Judges add to nation's misery.
40:20Oh, Marigold, it's simply not fair.
40:22Train drivers, air traffic controllers, local government workers,
40:26prison officers and drain clearance operatives...
40:29Drain clearance operatives.
40:31Charming company you keep, Guthrie.
40:33...have all managed to put the public through the hell of a summer of discontent.
40:37Now, if you go mad and strangle a porter
40:39when you've been waiting three days for a train at Waterloo,
40:42you won't even be tried for it, according to Mr Justice Featherstone,
40:46who also went on strike yesterday afternoon.
40:49Come off it, your lordships.
40:51Drop the old Spanish practices and offer the public a decent service.
40:55Marigold, it's all the fault of Rumpole.
40:57Of course it is.
40:59Why can't you twist him round your little finger for a change?
41:02You're bigger than he is.
41:04Well, I shall deny it all, in court.
41:06Oh, do. Then everyone will believe it.
41:09I had to read this paper at lunch in Harrods, at the Silver Grill.
41:14I was deeply humiliated.
41:17Oh, Marigold, I'm... I'm so sorry.
41:20I've bought you a present.
41:22Oh, have you, darling?
41:24I knew you'd understand.
41:26Oh, yes.
41:28I understand perfectly.
41:33It's your flat out, Guthrie.
41:35Now you can go down to the working men's club
41:37and play darts over a pint of wallop with the charge hands.
41:41I'm going to my bridge class with Hilda Rumpole.
41:44Her husband may have his drawbacks,
41:46but at least she's not married to a shop steward.
41:52Oh, brother.
42:03This is how I like you.
42:05You do like me a little, Elizabeth.
42:09When you're like this, I...
42:11Like what?
42:13You're old English Babs.
42:15Old?
42:17I'm not particularly old, actually.
42:19Not exactly old.
42:21Old-fashioned, Claude. That's what I meant.
42:24Oh, I see.
42:26I'm not particularly old, actually.
42:28Not exactly old.
42:30That's what I meant.
42:32Oh, I see.
42:34You like that, do you? I should have thought you wouldn't.
42:37It's the old-fashioned elegance I admire.
42:39The English gent.
42:41The bow tie and all that. It's rather sweet.
42:44Actually, it's an old Wickhamist bow tie.
42:46Is it really?
42:48I wouldn't wear it in the daytime, of course.
42:50It goes rather well with a great evening out like this.
42:55You're charming when you look like a good old traditional barrister.
42:59The sort that takes snuff.
43:01Snuff? Yes.
43:03Do you think I ought to take snuff?
43:05As a simple working-class girl, Claude,
43:07I do find that sort of thing a wild turn-up.
43:10Oh. Do you really?
43:13Snuff, eh?
43:15Well, I suppose I might give it a sniff.
43:17Out of a little silver box, I'd find that irresistible.
43:22Stop trying to be a whiz kid.
43:25Talking about slimming down and productivity targets.
43:29Sounds like some naff little middle manager in a suit.
43:32Horrible concept.
43:34Elizabeth, is that why you went off?
43:36And consumer choice.
43:38Consumer choice is absolutely yuck.
43:43You know what I love about you, Claude?
43:46Love? Please, Elizabeth, tell me.
43:49You being so square and vague
43:53and beautifully unbusinesslike
43:55and sort of dusty.
43:57Dusty?
43:59In the nicest possible way.
44:01Dreamy, with all sorts of ideals.
44:05You do believe in freelance barristers, don't you, Claude?
44:08I believe in them passionately, Elizabeth.
44:11Radical ones, too, of course.
44:14Why don't you say so at the next chambers meeting?
44:18That is, of course, if you're not too much in awe of Ballard.
44:22I'll show you if I'm in awe of Ballard.
44:25Elizabeth,
44:27do you suppose we might ever sing the love duet together?
44:31Not now, Claude.
44:33When?
44:35Maybe after the next chambers meeting.
44:37My lord,
44:39I gave the court an undertaking
44:41that the witness Gerald Jebb would return today.
44:44He was warned that he must be available,
44:47but I regret to inform the court
44:50that the witness Jebb has vanished.
44:54Surprise, surprise.
44:56Vanished, Mr Ballard?
44:58Yes, the inspector thinks he has probably left the country.
45:01Try Marbella.
45:03My lord, the flight of this witness,
45:05for it can only be described as a flight,
45:08must cast considerable doubt upon his evidence.
45:11If it can be described as evidence.
45:13Our inquiries have also disclosed
45:15that the defendant was, in fact,
45:18laying bricks in his garden,
45:20which could account for the brick dust on his clothing.
45:25In view of this,
45:27I therefore feel it would not be right
45:30for the prosecution to persist
45:33with these charges.
45:37Mr Brompo.
45:39I'm sure we are all very grateful to my learned friend.
45:42It is a wise decision.
45:44And no doubt your lordship has other matters to attend to.
45:48Yes, Mr Brompo.
45:50I have an important meeting with the lord chancellor.
46:08Lord chancellor.
46:10Ah, come along in, my dear.
46:13Come along in, my dear old fellow.
46:16Sit you down.
46:18Uh, drink?
46:20Oh, thank you, thank you.
46:23Lord chancellor, all this business about striking.
46:26Ah, that's why I wanted to see you, Guthrie.
46:29We really can't have judges going on strike, can we?
46:32I mean, we just fined the drain cleaning operatives
46:34a quarter of a million for not taking a ballot.
46:37Do you have that sort of money in your trousers?
46:40No, no, no, no, no, of course not.
46:44I think the judges are all pretty well agreed, lord chancellor,
46:47that should it come to a ballot,
46:49they might, um, well take action.
46:52Oh, dear, oh, my ears and whiskers.
46:54I don't think the cabinet will like that.
46:56The idea of the judges on a picket line
46:59with an election coming up,
47:01I don't think the, uh, the cabinet
47:03are going to be attracted by that.
47:06Got a cloth cap, have you?
47:08Well, yes, as a matter of fact, I have.
47:10Oh, well, uh, a little something to eat?
47:13Beer and sandwiches.
47:15Sometimes the old-fashioned way is the best.
47:17Now, look here, I don't wish to quarrel with you fellows,
47:20and I don't really know why these solicitor chaps
47:23want to be judges anyway.
47:25Oh, I quite agree. I mean, they make much more money
47:27sitting in their offices selling houses.
47:29Oh, whatever it is they do.
47:31Well, exactly.
47:32In fact, I don't know why anyone should want to be a judge
47:35unless, of course, their practice is a bit, uh, rocky.
47:39That's your trouble, was it?
47:41No, certainly not.
47:44I felt a call. Public duty.
47:47Well, I suppose your wife likes it.
47:49But no more talk about going on strike, eh?
47:52What do you say?
47:53We leave the whole question of solicitors joining the judges
47:57for the judges to decide.
48:00Super.
48:01I'm thinking along those lines.
48:04Good to talk to you, Guthrie.
48:05Thank you, Lord Chancellor.
48:10Now, why don't you try the cheese and tomato?
48:22With all due respect to you, Ballard,
48:24aren't we in danger of throwing out the baby with the bathwater?
48:27We mustn't lose our freedom, our eccentricity.
48:31That's what makes us, us barristers, so attractive.
48:35Ever since the Middle Ages, we have been the great freelancers,
48:38the independent radicals,
48:40the champions of freedom
48:42against tyranny and oppression,
48:44whereso'er it may be.
48:46We must preserve, at all costs,
48:48the great old British tradition.
48:50Erskine Brown, am I to understand
48:52that I can no longer count on your support
48:54in getting chambers efficient, business-wise?
48:56No, Ballard, I'm afraid you no longer have my support on this one.
48:59Does that mean we're not getting a new coffee machine?
49:02Yes, Uncle Tom, I'm rather afraid it does.
49:04Oh, good.
49:05Let's stop trying to be a lot of whiz kids,
49:07talking about slimming down and productivity targets.
49:11It makes us sound like awful little middle managers in suits.
49:15Yuck!
49:24I say, that's a terrible cold you've got, old man.
49:29Oh.
49:46Roast beef.
49:49Yorkshire pudding.
49:53Peace has broken out.
49:56Poor Mary Gore of Featherstone.
49:58She was so upset when Guffley went on strike.
50:00Do you know what she bought him?
50:02A cloth cap.
50:04Rather valuable.
50:06But there are certain people out the top
50:09who really shouldn't go on strike,
50:11in the public interest.
50:13People like judges and generals and...
50:15Decision-makers of all kinds.
50:17So I finally thought that going on strike
50:20really wasn't wrong.
50:21Distinctly off.
50:24It's just not the sort of thing
50:26that people like me and Guffley should do.
50:31You wouldn't buy me a cloth cap, would you, Rumpole?
50:35Perish the thought.
50:37And then I thought,
50:39it's a long time since you had a nice Yorkshire pudding.
50:43Oh, Hilda, thank you.
50:45Thank you very much.
50:47Yes, well, sit down, Rumpole.
50:48You don't want us to get cold, do you?
50:50After all the trouble I've been to.
50:52Sit down, Rumpole.
50:55You must obey.
51:22You must obey.
51:23You must obey.
51:24You must obey.
51:25You must obey.
51:26You must obey.
51:27You must obey.
51:28You must obey.
51:29You must obey.
51:30You must obey.
51:31You must obey.
51:32You must obey.
51:33You must obey.
51:34You must obey.
51:35You must obey.
51:36You must obey.
51:37You must obey.
51:38You must obey.
51:39You must obey.
51:40You must obey.
51:41You must obey.
51:42You must obey.
51:43You must obey.
51:44You must obey.
51:45You must obey.
51:46You must obey.
51:47You must obey.
51:48You must obey.
51:49You must obey.
51:50You must obey.
51:51You must obey.
51:52You must obey.
51:53You must obey.
51:54You must obey.
51:55You must obey.
51:56You must obey.
51:57You must obey.
51:58You must obey.
51:59You must obey.
52:00You must obey.
52:01You must obey.
52:02You must obey.
52:03You must obey.
52:04You must obey.
52:05You must obey.
52:06You must obey.
52:07You must obey.
52:08You must obey.
52:09You must obey.
52:10You must obey.
52:11You must obey.
52:12You must obey.
52:13You must obey.
52:14You must obey.
52:15You must obey.
52:16You must obey.
52:17You must obey.
52:18You must obey.
52:19You must obey.
52:20You must obey.
52:21You must obey.
52:22You must obey.
52:23You must obey.
52:24You must obey.
52:25You must obey.
52:26You must obey.
52:27You must obey.
52:28You must obey.
52:29You must obey.
52:30You must obey.
52:31You must obey.
52:32You must obey.
52:33You must obey.
52:34You must obey.
52:35You must obey.
52:36You must obey.
52:37You must obey.
52:38You must obey.
52:39You must obey.
52:40You must obey.
52:41You must obey.
52:42You must obey.
52:43You must obey.
52:44You must obey.
52:45You must obey.
52:46You must obey.
52:47You must obey.
52:48You must obey.

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